Short fuse?

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Posted: Wed Jan 16, 2008 10:39 am

Mike Smith is a busy little UN person arranging for the payment of contractors owed money by the Government of Nigeria:

Quote:

With due privileged and great honor I hereby write to address the honorable contractor whose email account is in the receipt of this email. On a scale memorandum meeting held with the United Nations organization and the senate board of Nigerian government with the aim to create an avenue which is to ensure that all eligible contractors receive part of their fund at this last quarter of the year via ATM CARD with the sum of $15,000,000.00 (fifteen million united stats dollars) has vividly quicken the heart of diseased contractors who out of ignorance lost their hard earn money to majority of fraudsters across the globe. The two bodies has therefore warned that all contractor should desist from who ever they are presently dealing with and possibly forward a copy of what ever has been given to them by their supposed associate to help steam and counter the activities of fraudsters.
In regards to your ATM CARD, the UN after the meting with the Nigerian senate and taken note of Nigeria present economic stability and high poverty, therefore advised that all eligible contractors after intensive screening will be entitle to the sum of $15,000,000.00 only as part of contract fund via ATM CARD while balance along with annual interest would follow on a mandated outlined instructions from the UN secretary general BAN_KI-MOON. This is to help the economic stability of the country Nigeria and utilized an avenue to aid and abet all eligible contractor from spending unnecessary money on documents/certificates such as; Fund ownership certificate, contract award certificate, and contract completion certificate, UNIMCC certificate, antiterrorism certificate, none residential tax clearance certificate, and some other unlisted. As a result of this medium, eligible contractors is gifted an equal opportunity of receiving their ATM CARD provided all mandated instructions is apparently adhere to through out the process of the ATM CARD to assure a swift and successfully delivery.

This turned up while I had a similar ATM bait, so I decided to draw him in and see if I could intertwine the two.

Quote:

This has come as a surprise. To the best of my knowledge my contact at the treasury department (Mrs Egobia) was legitimate; I understand that you�re now telling me that she is not so. Please confirm this.
For the record, my contract payment is $12.5 million, not $15 million. You can therefore pay the full amount. I would like to know more about this ATM card, however.

There were exchanges with a bank, and more with the Lad. Once or twice I made references to the Lads in the other baits, but Smith didn't notice. All the way through the Lads were referring to $15 million on the card. Finally I wrote:

Quote:

I told you before - and I'm gobsmacked that I have to tell you again - that my payment is $12.5 million TOTAL. If that card had $15 million on it, I don't want it! Tell them to issue another. I've told them already but they didn't listen either.

Off script at last:

Quote:

To re-issue your CARD is not a probelm but this can only happened after you had paid your fess. Your new CARD will be re-issue on express mode after your payment.

My reply was short:

Quote:

I am NOT going to pay for a faulty card!

At this point the Lad seemed to forget that he was working for the UN and dropped all pretence of politeness.

Quote:

ARE YOU STUPID WHO TOLD YOU OUR CARD IS FAULTY. DO YOU KNOW WHO YOU ARE DEALING WITH.
NO ONE NEEDS YOUR LITTLE $350, IS ONLY FOR YOUR DELIVERY AND IF YOU DONT PAY IT IS NOT A PROBLEM. WE SIMPLY UNDERSTANDS THAT YOU ARE NOT THE BENEFICIARY BECAUSE NO BENEFICIARY WOULD LEAVE HIS/HER ATM CARD FOR JUST $350 FOR THE DELIVERY.
PLEASE DO NOT CONTACT THIS OFFICE IF YOU ARE NOT THE RIGHTFUL BENEFICIARY AND NOT WILLING TO PAY TOUR DELIVERY FEE.
DO NOT WRITE THIS OFFICE AGAIN

No intro, no sign-off either.

I fired back:

Quote:

Listen, you stupid little bonehead, this has nothing to do with that gorram $350!

YOU told me the card was faulty when you told me that there was $15 million loaded against it. I don't want to be overpaid and have that used against me later. My payment is $12.5 million, not $15 million, as I told you THREE TIMES, and then you seem to shrug it off! Well, that doesn't exactly give me confidence in you, does it?

I'll pay the fee, WHEN YOU HAVE THE CARD READY WITH THE PROPER AMOUNT LOADED AGAINST IT. And if you don't understand that, then I wonder how the Sam Frick you ever got your gorram job!

I may not hear from him again... but doesn't take that kind of talk from any pen-pusher!

Trophy Videos · Posted: Wed Jan 16, 2008 1:29 pm

yastreb,

Malcolm Reynolds is one honest and tough businessman. Who are they to insult you, and tell you not to write again? The UN is such a poorly run organization. Smile

Posted: Wed Jan 16, 2008 3:31 pm

The post heading was just perfect Laughing

It did not take that much
to bring out the nugu's true personality.

Posted: Wed Jan 16, 2008 3:39 pm

Quote:

NO ONE NEEDS YOUR LITTLE $350,

Classic

Posted: Wed Jan 16, 2008 8:17 pm

He knuckled under... well, sorta:

Quote:

Sir,
One more insult from you I will have your CARD sized.
I told you that the San Paolo bank is presently once again processing your ATM CARD, it will be ready in the next couple of hours and they would be the one to send a copy to you via the internet.
Once you receive it, contact this office for payment details for your delivery charges.
Don�t you know I am under pressure here at my office, lot of contractors are sending in their fees and booking their ticket.
Any way I am sorry for the insult.
Sincerely, Mr. Smith

Posted: Wed Jan 16, 2008 8:58 pm

Quote:

Don�t you know I am under pressure here at my office, lot of contractors are sending in their fees and booking their ticket.
Any way I am sorry for the insult.
Sincerely, Mr. Smith

He seems to have his scams mixed... Laughing

Can't wait to hear that he's using "gorram" and "gobsmacked" in his replies to you! You have singlehandledly created a whole new scammer vocabulary.

Posted: Wed Jan 16, 2008 9:07 pm

I wrote back:

Quote:

I'm glad that someone's got his act together!
No amount of pressure can justify your outburst. I expected a little more maturity from someone at the United Nations. I don't have fond memories of the UN from my time in Somalia, but I'm prepared to let it go. Just keep your cool from now on, OK?
BTW - "lot of contractors are sending in their fees and booking their ticket" - ticket for what?

He had a quick answer:

Quote:

What i meant by ticket is securing space for their ATM CARD delivery.

OK, but ATM cards aren't that big!