Game of TWATs, As Far Away as Timbuktu

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Posted: Fri Oct 07, 2016 2:18 am

^^^ For the record, when Prosper calls Anita a "big for nothing", I really think he's trying to say she's "good for nothing".

Prosper sent Ben pretty much the same letter he sent Phystme but this is the "New and Improved" version -- now with 30% more whining!

Quote:

Ben i took you as My father but you have the mind to do this to me.

I am just a young man trying to saver God .
I have never ne to another man country befroe .

Is because of you people i want an get My international passeport. Which cost me a lot of money .

Now i am going back to Bennin republic in thé morinig. One of thé police man pût me in motor

If you want me to Côme back' you can send filthy money to me i promise you on one will know about it you can send it to My name .

Receviers name:<PROSPER>
Country:Nigerian.
Amounth:$3000

Send it thougty money gram you have ➗ it in to two $1500 ,you did not need to tell William about this,do not tell any one send it with youre money not thé church money .i will pay you back.

.because thé police told me that they did not want to sée me hère aging . you can Côme to Bamako or you can Côme tout Bennin republic.

Among thé two which one can you Côme to ?
Because i can not Côme to timbuk anging

Let me know

Your son

For the record, I still don't think he's getting deported since he's heading back to Bamako. I guess it's *possible*, but I've only heard of people getting deported from a country, not a city. More than likely, he's looking to get the hell out of Timbuktu but doesn't want to tell us he's doing it of his own choice. Or maybe the Timbuktuvian cops are getting tired of watching the buzzards circling the sky above Prosper. Who knows?

In any case, since our boi still wants Ben to meet him in Bamako or the "Bennin" Republic, that means he hasn't twigged and the bait is still on. But ... he's already been to Bamako and Bennin is so mundane. We really need to find somewhere more exotic for him to go.

Posted: Fri Oct 07, 2016 8:14 am

I know you'll be trying, but an up to date pic would be excellent.

Posted: Sat Oct 08, 2016 12:19 pm

^^^ Believe me, we've really been trying to get a pic (if nothing else I soooo want to see how that turquoise outfit's looking these days), but our little
fibber keeps telling us he sold his phone lol Very Happy

Elite Baiter Joined: 28 Mar 2015 Posts: 1916

^^ And the kindly policeman can't take one with his?

Posted: Sat Oct 08, 2016 12:45 pm

Quote:

If you want me to Côme back' you can send filthy money to me

It would be so tempting to send him some black-dyed paper and the address of a wash-wash Lad...

Posted: Wed Oct 12, 2016 11:50 pm

Prosper is finally headed home. Six thousand kilometers there and back again. And three weeks on the road. Not bad for those of us that experienced our first safari. Stay tuned eater. We aren't done with him.

Posted: Thu Oct 13, 2016 1:41 pm

Congratulations to your entire team!

Perhaps he should detail the journey...

Elite Baiter Joined: 28 Mar 2015 Posts: 1916

Many congratulations, team Onion, on what has turned out to be a most auspicious safari. Pity you didn't get the lad as far as the Wall where I'm sure Jon Snow would have been able to make something of him, even if he knows nothing, but we can't have everything, what with Winter coming, an' all.

Anyway, there still be Dragons, so let's hope there remains some fun to be had with the good Ser Prosper.

clapping

Posted: Thu Oct 13, 2016 5:18 pm

Yay! A win for the home team.

Prosper 0
Team Onion 1

I'm up for a rematch. Tickets booked Very Happy

Posted: Fri Oct 14, 2016 5:42 pm

He is an exchange between Rev. Dover and Prosper.

Quote:

Ben . you people have put me in to a big problem the bank that learned me the money that I used to come to Mali is now on my deck they give me from...

My son,

My apologies for not being around yesterday. We were at the Bentley dealership with Omar getting him his TWATmobile. A car like that really will attract some TWAT.

This email upsets me. You're acting like we haven't flown our church members around the world TWICE. The first time it happened you didn't even bother trying to show up.

The second time, we show up when you say you'll be there and you're not there. Then, we make every effort to get someone to You and you get annoyed with Abdul for picking up Omar. Well, maybe ifbyou had been wearing your holy robes none of this would have happened

Look, we had a bad string of luck. We've spent thousands and thousands of dollars trying to get you the money you so rightly deserve.

But I need you to be a little more understanding. Phystme wants to know why this id all taking so long. He doesn't understand why you just up and left Timbuktu. None of us do. It's sad.

But I still don't know why you are in Benin and not Nigeria? Are you not home yet?

We are working on seeing about getting money to you. However, there is a lot going on planning the next FIRE conference. Please be patient. I really need you to understand that this is expensive for our church.

Now explain this to me... why are you going to court? Did you get a loan from the bank to get there?

Posted: Wed Oct 19, 2016 8:15 pm

The wonder Rev Dr Dewey comes back into play! And it appears Prosper can't seem to keep his stories straight.

Quote:

Hello Brother Cheatham , William have told me to contact you regarding matters of money that you are the one who handle it .

Please what is going on , I need to hear from you .

Thanks

Once again, insisting that Dewey must have receipts (got to love the red tape and governmental restrictions), Prosper comes up with a new excuse

Quote:

Dewey , I borrowed money from the bank to come to Mali and right now the bank need there money back ,
I just come back from court today and the court give me the grace from today till 22 of this month to pay all the money back ,

Rev Dr Dewey Cheatham you ask for court documents and hospital bills ,I did not have court document , here is Nigerian they did not give me that ,

How much are you people going to give me ,,,,,,,,?

Thanks
Joel

Quote:

Dear Dewey ,I understand you but to be honest with you the court did not give me any denouement ,this is between me and bank not me and some one els , the money that i am own the bank is only $1500 but that is not all i need i need to get a place to stay and laptop and some other thins

Thanks
Joel

So now the court is not involved in the matter, and didn't give him any "denoement"

Quote:

Dewey i just come back from the court and this is what they give me

I will wait to hear from you

Thanks
Joel

Attached to the e-mail was a really, totally legitimate legal document.

So now he has been caught directly in a lie, I wonder what he plans to do now?

Posted: Wed Oct 19, 2016 9:39 pm

Quote:

Ben . you people have put me in to a big problem the bank that learned me the money that I used to come to Mali is now on my deck they give me from...

Oh dear.... Very Happy

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