Charity lad begging for pain

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Not quite a Newb Joined: 28 Jul 2014 Posts: 70

He's a lazy SOB - got this from him:

Quote:

Hello Mr. James i appreciate your kind effort and i thank you so much from the bottom of my heart, i am so glad to hear this news but i am actually confused at the moment because the bank contacted me needing some information about me which i think is unusual so i will like to know if they can't do a normal transfer to the bank account details i gave you i guess you should do something about it, i know you trust them and you have been working with them for ages but i am not really comfortable with their demands because no bank will ask for what they are needing and this is beyond my knowledge, i don't know why they will be asking a client to provide all those details before a transaction can be done. I will be happy if you could call Walsh or someone at the bank to help transfer the money since they have the bank account details already, thank you so much once again Mr. James you are indeed a good brother, God bless you.

Kind Regards
Steve James

It looks like he have forgotten his name it's no longer Jobs but James Very Happy

I have answer him that I need to talk to our trusted banker to understand what information they require just to drag this one out a bit, and finally I'll answer 'just fill out the required papers".

Posted: Mon Sep 28, 2015 2:39 pm

Joe the Banker is NOT pleased with Stevie's silence. It looks like James's money will go to my fake lad...

Quote:

Dear Comodore,

Before she died, miss Gina expressed some concern about your being somewhat unreliable. As I came to know you better, I was certain that you were simply struggling with mental issues. Now, however, I can see that you are just lazy. I opened my heart to you and offered you the opportunity of a lifetime. And, In return, you have managed to squander the chance to help those in need and become incredibly wealthy using hollow words and empty promises.

If you are what passes for an officer in the U.S. Military, it is no wonder you haven't won a war since the middle of the twentieth century. Personally, I think it more likely you are some PFC pretending to hold an office you couldn't hope too achieve. What is your real job? Cleaning latrines, I shouldn't wonder!

At this point, you've managed to tarnish several friendships and acquaintances, not to mention causing my standing in my church to slip somewhat, since judgement of character is a highly regarded skill among us. Thank goodness I can count on the Reverend Peter to sort your mess out. As for you, I can only say that iI fear for those poor little orphans who have fallen into your incompetent clutches.

Good day to you,
Joseph B. Walsh
Branch Manager, HSBC

ETA: ^Joe will be more than happy to send an appropriately condescending letter to our boi about his inability to fill out a simple anti-terrorist form.

Posted: Tue Sep 29, 2015 2:33 pm

James and Joe just met at the bank and the result was not good for Stevie.

Quote:

PFC Jobs,

Well, now I am confuse. It would seem, from your refusal to reply to any of my emails, that you no longer wish to be involve in our business venture. But then Mr. James came to me asking why you were unable to fill out a simple anti-terrorist form in order to expedite his initial 20,000 Euro money transfer. He said that you even asked hi for assistance! Is this true? Never mind. Don't answer that. I believe Mr. James is telling me the truth. Unfortunately, due to your gross mishandling of this very simple, straight forward procedure, I had to return Mr. James' money to him as it is illegal for us to keep it beyond a certain time frame.

I did mention to him that I knew of another man of the clothe in Nigeria who has an orphanage and is most trustworthy and competent, but I'm afraid his faith in me has been badly shaken by your buffoonery. I don't think I have o tell you what a difficult position your inability to function has put me in. I just want to know why you would think of doing business when you not only lack even the faintest scintilla of business acumen but any desire to succeed at all?

Joseph B. Walsh
Branch Manager, HSBC

Not quite a Newb Joined: 28 Jul 2014 Posts: 70

I mailed the Lad my "just fill out the forms" mail, but he did not answer, so following the steps of Mr. W@lsh mail I hit him with this

Quote:

Mr. Jobs.

I have talked with Mr W@lsh and you don't seam to understand what is required to transfer funds. He just returned the 20.000 EUR to me and I must say that I'm very disappointed. My small group of very wealthy friends have just made it clear to me that they will no longer have any thing to do with you and your donation have been cancelled and we are now working with a different orphanage that have been recommended by Mr. Walsh. They have no problems in filling out the required documents.

I'm sorry about all of this, but I can't change the minds of my friends. I will however be willing to help out on a personal level and offer to donate 20.000 EUR on my own. I have talked with my bank and there is only one way of getting the transfer done with out filling out the forms and that is by a personal appearance in a branch of my bank. So if you don't feel like filling out the forms you can just catch the next military transport to Europe (may I suggest Germany) and I will meet you and we can get this done.

I don't know if he will respond to this, but there is still a small hook and a possibility to get the money, but there's no way of getting out of filling out the forms. I doubt that he'll take a Safari to Germany Very Happy

Posted: Wed Sep 30, 2015 3:17 pm

Nice work. Thanks for the dovetail! Joe will give Stevie one last chance. Of course, ya never know, but I think this bait is in the can.

Not quite a Newb Joined: 28 Jul 2014 Posts: 70

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
I have to agree this time it's over - no mails from him today. I'll give it a few days before I declare this bait dead Very Happy

How ever I do have an idea - and I might send him a mail in a few weeks from a different character (Mr. J@mes lawyer) with some sad news Evil or Very Mad

It have been fun baiting with you hope we'll bait again some time - thank you

Posted: Fri Oct 02, 2015 2:54 pm

^ Thanks. I appreciate your help. Along with several other baiters, it made for an entertaining Summer! Very Happy

I like the lawyer angle. Probate?

BTW, I really think he's scraping for money at this point.

Joe sends one last email in confusion and disgust.

Quote:

Dear PFC Jobs,

So this is how you walk away from hundreds of thousands of pounds sterling? I find it mystifying that a man, even of your limited mental capacity, would simply walk away from the opportunity of a lifetime without a single word. Well, have it your way. I've done all I could to help you enrich your life and the lives of those starving kaffirs you say you care so much about. I/m sure it's possible that your man in Africa really is as good as you say but, given what I've seen of your business acumen, so far, I'm not terribly hopeful. And God help those poor little frogs in your French facility.

I truly wish I could save you from your own incompetence. But there is nothing I can do without two-way communications. I wish you the best of luck with your orphanages. You obviously need all you can get, not to mention the children living in them.

Best regards,
Joseph B. Walsh
Branch Manager, HSBC

Posted: Mon Oct 05, 2015 6:04 pm

Well, Stevie is not dead, he just smells that way. Just got his whine-fest which Joe will respond to tomorrow.

Note: no major ground activities in Afghanistan in the past month.

Quote:

Hello Mr. Walsh i hope you have been hearing what is happening here on news? (Yup. One hospital bombing) it is not easy and we find it hard to even communicate with each other not talking of outsiders, this has been very though to us at the moment and nothing is more important to us than to try to resolve the craziness issues going on here... well there is no need to be disappointed in me because i haven't even gotten time for myself and someone like you should understand what is really going on here, if you haven't seen the news kindly try to read something about afghanistan online and you will understand my point of view, (Ibid) i am actually not happy about what is really going on my self and i really want to know if this people of yours really want to help the organisation then they should do it in a way which won't bring about problems (Well, they are serious about causing you the pain you asked for. And the problems are all YOUR fault, schmuck!) with us all so every donation can go through successful, i hope all is well with you and kindly get back to me soon as you get this email, thanks for your time and everything.

Kind Regards

Steve Jobs

Posted: Tue Oct 06, 2015 2:29 pm

For some reason, Joe isn't buying the B.S.

Quote:

PFC Jobs,

I cannot believe you actually expect me to believe that one hospital bombing has you running about like a flock of heedless chickens. I must apologize but you are going to have to do much better than than that pitiful excuse. From what I've read and heard, your superiors are considering air strikes and, while I can see the benefit to the war effort of you out of an airplane, I serially doubt that that is your superiors' plan.

Now to my dissapoint ment. Whether you think I need to be or not, I am. It is you who have shown yourself to be playing with this business. It is you who decided not to fill out a few simple forms. It is you who have left people who were sincerely trying their possible best to help you in the lurch. It is you who were unable to follow through on a few simple tasks. If it weren't for Reverend Peter (fake lad chops really are fun!) stepping in and succeeding where you have so miserly failed, I would not have been able to restore my standing in my church. But, thanks to his enthusiastic work, his orphanage is now receiving the support it needs and he is inline to be the next Pastor of T.W.A.T. in African. And the best part is that I'm in the middle of it all.

Well, I must be off as I have a 4:00 tea time. Do drop me a line if you can find the time in between latrine cleanings. Always good to read from those in the trenches.

Kindest regards,

Joseph 8. Walsh
Branch Manager, HSBC

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