Taxi for Mr Mugu

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Posted: Fri May 08, 2015 4:56 pm

There's not really much reason to visit Bellinzona, the beautiful capital of the Swiss canton of Ticino, unless you like castles, mountains and people speaking Italian. Bally the wash wash lad has a good reason to visit though, his maga Conte Capra Á has $10,000,000 worth of black money that he needs to clean after being scammed by a previous partner.

Bally arrived in Zürich from Sweden (or so he claims) yesterday and after the usual arguments of "it would be better if you came here to Zürich", he agreed to make the journey south towards the Swiss Italian border.

It's currently 18:45 here in Switzerland and he has just rung me to say that he is in a taxi and will be arriving in Bellinzona about 40 minutes. I double checked with him and he confirmed that he had decided to get a taxi all the way from Zürich to Bellintona, which, according to Google is a 110 miles (that's 177km for Pastor Frank), 2 and a half hour drive each way. I don't know what sort of deal he has done with the taxi driver, but the only price estimate that I could find to give an idea of the taxi fare was a website that estimates that a 50km taxi journey in Switzerland would cost about 200 Fr. - someone is going to be a lot poorer tonight.

Posted: Fri May 08, 2015 5:16 pm

Posted: Fri May 08, 2015 5:52 pm

w00t!!! Congratulations, B8er!! Do keep us informed of the lad's itinerary and tourism plans! Laughing

Posted: Fri May 08, 2015 6:34 pm

Oh, this is just beautiful news.

Posted: Fri May 08, 2015 6:47 pm

The texts are starting to arrive and he seems to be having a problem finding the hotel. Rolling Eyes

Baiting Guru Joined: 10 Oct 2010 Posts: 3876

congratulations Smile

if you need someone who speaks german and english with a (fake)swiss dialect, just contact me Smile

(although today could be difficult, tomorrow is much better for me).

Posted: Fri May 08, 2015 7:16 pm

^^^Thanks, but he's already spoken to me a few times using my best mangled English with the odd Italian word thrown in here and there, so he'd probably twig.

Don't you love lads who manage to totally fuck up without any help. I gave him the name of a made up hotel (the Hotel Laughing

) that I told him was just by the station and he's managed to end up at a restaurant right on the edge of town off a dual carriage way - it'll take my character at least 1/2 an hour to get there.

Posted: Fri May 08, 2015 7:23 pm

B8er wrote:

The texts are starting to arrive and he seems to be having a problem finding the hotel. Rolling Eyes

If I hadn't bought one of those keyboard protectors you pointed out to me many moons ago I would be in need of a new one right now! Laughing

It should be getting nice and chilly up in the Alps about now...another fine Swiss safari!! Thumbs up

Posted: Fri May 08, 2015 7:30 pm

Unfortunately, the weather here is quite good at the moment - the local weather stations seems to be recording a temperature of about 15C.

But, he's managed to fuck up yet again, by giving me the name of a restaurant that actually has 3 locations in the town - 2 of them with very similar names and the vic is now travelling to the wrong one. Laughing

Posted: Fri May 08, 2015 8:15 pm

Ah! A self-baiter...this gets better and better!

Posted: Fri May 08, 2015 9:20 pm

The name of your character cracks me up. Goat Abuser. Laughing

I do so enjoy your contributions to the Swiss tourism industry. I hope you can keep this lad there for a few more days.

Posted: Fri May 08, 2015 10:05 pm

Excellent work, B8er! And you wondered why that Metallica song seemed appropriate....

Posted: Fri May 08, 2015 10:15 pm

Quote:

Don't you love lads who manage to totally fuck up without any help.

Great work, B8er! clapping

Posted: Sat May 09, 2015 1:26 am

I left him last night with a final phone call saying that I had just passed the Movenpick Hotel and was nearly at the Restaurant Marché Sud (bottom right of this map https://goo.gl/maps/CzVop).

Unfortunately, he was sitting in the Marché Sud Autobahn that is shown in the top of the map. They're only about a km apart as the crow flies, but, driving between them is a 15km journey as one of them is on a dual-carriageway with 5km to the nearest exit. I told him that I would now have to drive to the other one and to wait there and then I switched off my phone and went to bed Laughing

This morning I've woken to a dozen missed phone calls and a number of texts asking where I was ans then silence until 00:40 CET when there is a text saying that he is back in Zürich and "disappointed" that we didn't meet.

I doubt that I will get him to travel again, but he still seems keen to do the deal, so I'll try and waste a bit more of his time and money by keeping him in Zürich for another day or two.

Trophy Videos · Posted: Sat May 09, 2015 1:50 am

Bellinzona?? oops! I meant, Bologna! No wonder you can't find it...

3 h 16 min (320.3 km) via A1/E35 ???
Laughing

05/29/15

WTG, B8er !!!