| Author |
Message |
godbobdog
419Eater is my life
Joined: 28 Jun 2013
Posts: 274
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 Posted:
Tue Jul 15, 2014 3:06 pm |
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I've been baiting a guy since May. I've gotten three piggies out of him and he's filled out a form. I've gotten him to go on ALL CAPS rants.
Jayhawk is a lawyer working on his behalf. The lad has promised to write out his complaints long hand and scan them for our amusement.
But he's dragging his feet with excuses.
He has promised one of my characters some money if he can drum up some more business for his loan company. So I am drumming...
PM me if interested. You can go to either Western Union or Money Gram. Some of my evil characters will be working at either of these two places in our small town. They'll chop your dollars. |
_________________
 x18 
 Roberto/Jonathan/Harry/Tony "OGUN GO KILL YOU FOR ROAD MANAGER CHIEF CHIEF CHIEF"
Last edited by godbobdog on Tue Jul 15, 2014 3:38 pm; edited 1 time in total |
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godbobdog
419Eater is my life
Joined: 28 Jun 2013
Posts: 274
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| Posted:
Tue Jul 15, 2014 3:24 pm |
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Some lowlights of the story so far:
After the lad filled out some paperwork to prove he wasn't a terrorist, the banker sent one of his employees across town to the Western Union to send over $2000. Instead of money, the employee Lenny sent this
| Quote: |
hey dickhead
my boss sez i gotta use western union to send you like $2000. this is just to let you know that i decided to keep some of it and send you just $500. and if you dont like it you can suck a lemon because i know you are a crook and a scammer and an overall piece of shit. that dumbass banker is just too fucking stupid to know that. but i'll tell him if you misbehave and try to tattle on me. if i get fired--fuck it. i'll just go flip burgers at macdonalds.
and i'm supposed to scan the receipt. yeah i'll do that tomorrow when i feel like it. i don't feel like it right now. you should be happy to be getting $500 because you live in a shithole in africa and have to scam money from stupid americans.
i look forward to spending the $1500. i think i'll buy a sexdoll. |
The lad replies:
| Quote: |
To whom it may be concern
i got your mail, Mr. Banker, the senior account manager has written me an e-mail and all the document legally signed by both party between MR XXXX XXXX and XXXXXX LOAN COMPANY, MR. banker told me he has instructed you to make the payment via western union i want you to act as you were INSTRUCTED.
Regards |
Lenny wasn't cooperative
| Quote: |
hey penisbreath
just so you know, i already went to moneygram and sent you $500. i'd give you the receipt but i don't want to right now. you are taking a bossy attitude with me. fuck that. i'm tired of ppl bossing me around. if you want me to scan the receipt you need to suck up more. i'm in a bad mood cuz those sexdolls i wanted costed too much money. i shouldn't have sent you the $500. live and learn i guess. i should go to moneygram and get my $500 back but i'm an honest dude. you just need to suck up and be nice. then i'll scan the receipt if i'm in a better mood. if i'm not, then you'll just have to suck another lemon haha.
lenny |
Oooooh?? $500? Send it to me!
| Quote: |
Hello
send us the following detail
Sender name
sender country
MTCN NO
along with the scan copy okay
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_________________
x18
Roberto/Jonathan/Harry/Tony "OGUN GO KILL YOU FOR ROAD MANAGER CHIEF CHIEF CHIEF"
Last edited by godbobdog on Tue Jul 15, 2014 3:37 pm; edited 1 time in total |
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godbobdog
419Eater is my life
Joined: 28 Jun 2013
Posts: 274
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| Posted:
Tue Jul 15, 2014 3:34 pm |
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hey shitforbrains
with that attitude youll be waiting for a long time okay. you gotta be nice to me cuz im the one with the receipt okay. don't be demanding stuff cuz you arent my boss okay. you are a just a bucket of shit scammer who should be begging me okay. tell me how you would suck my dick. how would you make me happy? you do that and ill get a good laugh and then ill send you the receipt and you can go buy you some nigerian whores or buy yourself a nice dress and lipstick or whatever the fuck you wanna do with the money. the point is you gotta be nice. im sick and tired of being ordered around okay.
lenny |
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please send us the scan copy tanks for your understanding
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please and please send us the scan copy okay |
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please i am sorry kindly send us the scan copy please i am sorry
okay |
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| how are you doing we are still waiting for the scan copy please i know you are a honest dude please hope to hear from you |
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boss
how are you doing boss please send the scan copy please |
(I love making them wait for a response.)
He's begged enough. I'll reward him with a response:
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dear balllicker
that is sounding much better. yes. i like being your boss. the first thing you have to do is describe how you would suck my dick and how much you would like it. use lots of details. then, if it makes me happy, ill send you a copy of the receipt. itll be sort of like paying a whore. do you like being a whore? will you buy a party dress with the money and a wig and some fake boobs? send me a picture. id like that yes.
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Hello boss
Tanks for your understanding, please boss do send the scan receipt just as you have promise, I wil be waiting to hear from you okay |
That wasn't what I was asking for:
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hey turdburglar
that didnt turn me on much. i didnt promise nothing. i said if you described how you would suck my dick and if it turned me on then i would send the receipt. you havent done your end of the bargain, whore. i dont pay until after services have been rendered. |
He responded by cutting and pasting some online instructions for auto-fellatio.
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hello boss
please send us the scan copy boss
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dear honeybuns
that was great!!! you should write professionally. i had no idea you know so much about sucking your own cock. i just shut my eyes and imagined your lush wet warm lips wrapped around my tiny white dick and ive never been so excited in my life. you were amazing!
as i promised, here is a scan of the receipt. buy yourself a nice dress, sweety. |
And I sent an unreadable Moneygram receipt. |
_________________
x18
Roberto/Jonathan/Harry/Tony "OGUN GO KILL YOU FOR ROAD MANAGER CHIEF CHIEF CHIEF" |
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Padme
Moderator
Joined: 27 May 2005
Posts: 7425
Location: The Rebel Base
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| Posted:
Tue Jul 15, 2014 3:42 pm |
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The email greetings alone area hilarious. |
_________________
"Your knife will surely cut off your head trust me. Useless man zombie."
"Shege danburuba, your end has come. The spirit of all the people you kill is after you now and you can not excape it. See you in hell dan esika."
  x2   x6 x2  Acra>Sngpre Acra>Dkr>Rsso>Bmko>Kpndo>Ctnu -Team Woody
 Akure>Kano -Amos
x8 x2 Owerri>Maiduguri>Owerri>Lagos>Lomé>Bmko>Kolokani Bmko>Nioro>Bmko>Timbuktu>Bmko>Youri Bmko>Mauritania>Kidira>Dakar>Jail -Team Godwin
's - assorted West Africa safaris, Cyril w/ Spindrift, France-Dublin w/ DSW
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godbobdog
419Eater is my life
Joined: 28 Jun 2013
Posts: 274
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| Posted:
Tue Jul 15, 2014 3:50 pm |
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hello
please resend the scan copy its not clear okay |
| Quote: |
LOVE
please i want you to send me the scan copy of the receipt again the one you sent before is not clear okay
tanks for your understanding
Also send the following information along
Sender name:
sender country:
MTCN NO.
Other vital detail
hope to hear from you LOVE |
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hey numnuts
i got fired today asshole. its your fault. did you tell banker about what i did? fuck you buddy.
i can read the scan just fine. whats your problem? maybe youve been sucking your own dick too much. i hear that causes blindness.
lenny
p.s. you really are an expert at sucking your own dick. your message sounded like the voice of experience. |
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I never told him okay, I. Want you to send me the following
Sender name
Sender country
Refence number
Amount sent
Text questn
Answer.
Hope to hear from you, pleas try and resend it or you try to download it and see was not. Cleared, I will help you talk to your boss okay |
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Hello boss
Awaiting your mail so that I can know how to communicate with mr banker okay, you will be called back I keep my words.
Tanks |
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Hello
How are you doing I know how you feel I have spoken to banker about wasyou told me that you have been fired just be claim you will be called back okay, all I want you to do now is to send us the photo copyof receipt make sure its very clear and readable by monday I promise you your boss will call you back to your appointment okay, just play your part and leave the rest for us
Your. Swift mail is needed okay |
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hey hershey highwayman
if you get my job back before the end of next week, ill help you out. otherwise i will get my money back from moneygram and you will just be shit out of luck. dickwad.
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Yes wil get back your job all you need to do now is to send us the photocopy of receipt them my Director with the company lawyer whom signed the transaction will order worthington to restore your job okay
We never told him any thing okay |
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Hello
Send us the following
Sender name
Sender country
Text questn
Answer
Amount
Refence number
Do this an see on monday you will be call by your boss okay
Arrangement are on ground already.
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hey african queen
that sounds just perfect except it has to be the other way around. i get my job back on monday and then you get your photocopy of the receipt okay. |
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Hello I got your mail, this is a deed you took $1500 for your self good, now the deed is this send us the photocopy of the receipt between now to monday morning if you are not cal back to your job go and pick the money but if you are called back leave the money okay.
Tanks for your understanding
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how are you doing please your urgent mail is needed in regards the deed okay, as i speck now our company lawyer is fully involved all you need to do is to send us the photo copy of the receipt between now to Monday morning if you are not call back to your job go to money gram to pick the money but if you are call then leave the money okay.
tanks once again for your usual cooperation, awaiting the receipt. |
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HELLO
how are you doing, while are you delaying this deed all the arrangement are already in place even MR FAKE VICTIM has spoken to your boss for you to been recall back to your job. so we are expecting your part in this deed send us the photo copy of the receipt very clear and readable between NOW TO MONDAY MORNING IF YOU ARE NOT CALL BACK YOUR JOB, GO and pick up the money but if you call back especially on Monday morning leave the money okay
your swift reply is needed. |
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hey felchmonster
i think youve been huffing a lot of spraypaint. you dont make any sense at all. you can go fuck yourself it you think ill send you another copy of the receipt before i get my job back.
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_________________
x18
Roberto/Jonathan/Harry/Tony "OGUN GO KILL YOU FOR ROAD MANAGER CHIEF CHIEF CHIEF" |
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godbobdog
419Eater is my life
Joined: 28 Jun 2013
Posts: 274
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| Posted:
Tue Jul 15, 2014 4:03 pm |
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how are you doing, i am glad to inform you that i have spoken to banker on phone call in regards your your call back, He told me that the reason you were fired was that you did not show up in the office on the 19/06/2014. then we now came to conclusion that we need to stand for you as a guarantor for you to gain back your job he immediately forwarded a document of Affidavit which will be signed and endorse by our company lawyer to testified about you are a good worker, as i speck now things are already been put in place, i want you to know that we can prefer this great task without you send us the photo copy or the following detail:
sender name
sender country
amount
refence number/ RF. N
text question
Answer |
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hey felchmeister
why no more love letters? not that i give a shit. i met a nice girl. her name is rhonda. we went to the local arts and crafts show together and i spent some of that $1500 on her. then later she sucked my dick for real. not pretend like you. i like to fuck girls. not like you. you like to suck your own cock. you sure are one freaky dude.
i dont think i can afford to make another copy of that receipt. i think you need to get your eyes checked. unless i get a job. then i can afford to send you the receipt. like you said, im an honest dude. you are just a scammer who likes to suck his own dick so i cant trust you. |
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i am not a scammer, let make things right here you were given $2000 to send you took $1500 who is the scammer here?
send me the following detail
(blablablah)
Answer |
Some moral outrage:
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i want you to know that i have been claim with you enough of enough of this, if you don't send it with my office i will forward all your email down to banker the senior accountant General, that you are in possession of the money you said you have sent, are you not a human why are greedy you took $1500 you did not work for it now, send us the other one since 18/06/2014 you have been playing around.
if you don't want to send us the receipt or the detail may be you will have to spread it in JAIL you scammer, your banker trust you but never knew he was working with a criminal.
get us the copy other wise |
I let him stew for awhile:
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i have fully involved the law enforcement agent FBI in this case since are playing yourself, MR FAKE MAGA has contact his lawyer along with our company lawyer to fish you out,
you are going to spread the money in JAIL, SECONDLY you must vomit the money BACK, greedy soul criminal |
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hey country blumkin
yeah right. like anyone is going to take the word of a known internet scammer. you just talk a lot of shit. the fbi would throw you in jail so fast you wouldnt have time to get your dick out of your mouth. just get me my job back and ill send your $500. maybe i should tell the nigerian government you like sucking dick. then we see who spreads in jail, wont we?
so just get me my job back okay. |
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| send the $500 first then you get your job back promise on latest 5AM on 23/06/2014 if pass then the both parties will take action,fake maga is aware of this and has promise to help you just act right, don't be greedy you took $1500 use your brain send me the $500 as agreed okay. |
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scammer can you read this? this what you send to us
send us the right one now to secure your job or you prefer $500 then your job? |
(And he attaches a copy of the unreadable scan.)
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Hello lenny
How are you doing speck up time is going |
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hey cumlicker
nobody from the bank has called me up offering me my job back. it is starting to look like you will just have to kiss that $500 goodbye. i think ill use it to buy a new dress for rhonda. then ill tear it off of her and ravish her. hahahaha. unless you and your army of lawyers can help me get employed. |
And in response to the copy of the unreadable scan:
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dear queenie
i can read that just fine. you should get your eyes checked. or get a better computer. or stop jacking off to pictures of morgan freeman. |
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Yes we can get you employed on the conditional that you will be a good boy and you will have to send us the receipt of the payment okay
You can also send us the following detail since you can read it clear stop delaying us
|
And he sends a couple more variations on this same message. blablabla. Lenny isn't impressed.
| Quote: |
| fuck you. you act fast. you have until friday to get me this job or you will never see this $500 again. |
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_________________
x18
Roberto/Jonathan/Harry/Tony "OGUN GO KILL YOU FOR ROAD MANAGER CHIEF CHIEF CHIEF" |
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godbobdog
419Eater is my life
Joined: 28 Jun 2013
Posts: 274
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| Posted:
Tue Jul 15, 2014 4:27 pm |
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Meanwhile, Lenny's roommate Cat has a scheme of his own:
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Dear Sir
You don't know me, so allow me to introduce myself. My name is Cat Xxxxxx and I lives in Xxxxxx, Montana. I am a fry cook at McDonalds, but I would like to enter the world of high finance.
I think you know my roommate Leonard Jones. For reasons I don't understand, he calls himself "Xxxxxxx Xxxxxx". He's kind of unstablish. He's passed out right now. He spended the whole night partying with his new girlfriend.
He was recently fired from his job, but he parties like he gots lots of money. This puzzled me so I sneakinged onto his laptop and looked into his email. That is how I find out about you.
My my. He scammered you out of some money. I think we can should make a deal.
There is a new job openering at the local branch of the Chase Manhattan Bank. I would like that job. I think you have some lawyering people that know Mr. Worthington who workers at the bank. Please have them talk to him.
I also finded a Moneygram receipt. I think you would like to know more about that. If you can get that nice job for me, I can tell you more.
Please help me. |
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| Send us the receipt now it belong to my company okay, have just send your name to mr banker the senior accontant General for you to replace the vecancy okay. |
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I got your mail I am so glad okay I want you to send me the money gram receipt now take a photo of it now send it to me okay. Also with the following detail
blah blah blah
I want to know the lenny is criminal, I want you to act fast after this send me your CV and mobile number I will help you to get a job from mr worthington okay |
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| I must now hurrying to work for the lunch rush. I will writing you again. We haves much to discuss. I needs your help before I help you. |
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Hello
I want you to know that I have already send your name to my good friend Banker. Send us the detail before he go to money gram to pick it up now then we can proceed for your employment okay I keep to my words |
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| I had a longing day at McDonalds. I had to frying 145 Big Macs today because tourists did visiting to Xxxxxx. Tomorrow I will be wear my best suit and visiting the bank. They will get my resume from me then I will find Mr. Worthington and asking him if you gave good word for me. I giving you the Money Gram details when I finding out if you keeping you words. |
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Hello, I got your mail I want you to be careful because of your roommate all you just need to do now is to be claim don't go to mr worthington yet until you are ask to do so okay, send me your cv and other information in less then five day your employment will be ready but if you don't send the information now I can't help because its almost going to 6days of the said payment.
I want you to act fast and send me the detail if you really need this job, prove to me that you are different from jones your roommate okay. |
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I want you to act fast if you really need this job, send us the detail as fast as you can so that we can help you properly in the processing of your employment with chase Bank okay, don't be faster then your shadow don't go to bank yet until 5day from now when all the arrangement has been done by us okay.
Please your reply mail should contain the money gram info if not you don't need the job this could be a golden opportunity for you to be a great man but if you don't make use of it well you end up achieving nothing okay |
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I needs this job. I got a message that I has to work today, so I applying tomorrow. Please talking to Worthington. After Worthington agrees that you know me and saying good things about me, I send you receipt.
I attaching CVS. I thinking you agrees this looking good. |
(And I attach an extremely unimpressive resume.)
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| Be wise I have just forward it to mr banker now he said you should wait until you send me the receipt we cannot help you so act right now. |
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MR Banker just told me that if you provide the receipt along with the following two day time you will be call for interview but this will determine it how trusted you are how honest that you are different from jones if you provid it,its means you are different from jones but if can meaning you are the same we can employ a scam again okay
Prove your self NOW. |
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I just get back from working. It was a hard day. Somebody stealing a chicken nugget but gets caught. He thinks the manager didn't seeing him but manager catched him. The guy gets yelled at and fired. Lots of stress that I not liking.
At McDonald's they teaching us important rule. We having to making the customer pays first. If we giving them the food first they might leaves with no paying. There is the same problems with the receipt. If I giving you the number, then maybe you not talk to Banker and I not get a job. So I asking Banker tomorrow if you says truth. If he says you lie, then I not giving you the reference number. I giving it to Banker instead. Then he knowing I be honest and he knowing you be liar.
I find out tomorrow. |
The blood pressure starts to rise:
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i got your mail if you go to Mr banker you will be arrested as i speck now your roommate will soon be in prison okay.
just act as i have told you and stop beating round the bush send me the detail or you forget about it, i am not a child also if you are not careful you will also part counted among jones, this give me the impression that you are like jones even worst then him, i keep my word I AM A NOBLE MAN.
I TRUST YOU WHILE CAN YOU TRUST ME SEND IT NOW OR YOU FORGET ABOUT IT, ITS OUR COMPANY DETAILS THAT ARE ON IT, JONES TOOK $1500 OUT $2000 YOU NOW WANT TO TAKE $500
WE WILL ALL MEET IN COURT. |
OK. I'll cave in. In real life, I used Moneygram to send $5 to a friend just to see how it works. Also, I got a real life reference number out of it, which I now use.
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Oh. Please please please please don't send me to jail. Please. I'm
raises as a Christian and I never stealing. Bad peoples in jail be
doings bad things to my young body. I looking and looking but not
finds the receipt. I remembers the number, though. The reference
number is xxxxxxx. Also, that bad Leonard has putting bad question
and answer. Question is "Do you suck dick?" and answer is "yes". I
don't remember anymore. Please please don't putting me in jail. I is
good honest person. |
And then there is a lot of back and forth consisting of "Are you sure?" "Yes. Please don't put me in jail. I'm sure."
Finally, he believes me:
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| TANKS FOR EVERYTHING, CAT OKAY. |
| Quote: |
| TANKS FOR THE INFO, THE CRIMINAL JONES ONLY SEND $5 PLEASE SEND HIS PIX TO ME I WANT TO GIVE THE FBI NOW |
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He beating me up. I moves away and live with dad now. I doesn't have
his pix. Please be arresting him. He bad man.
You said I be rewarded. When?
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YES I WILL BUT HE HAS COLLECTED THE MONEY FROM MONEY GRAM OKAY.
SEND ME YOUR PHONE NUMBER |
Cat is intimidated by the ALL CAPS:
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| You mean man. Go away. |
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how are you doing, i want you be our company agent we will pay you well, so your job start now go from house to house collect email address on the sign post and other place of business men and women and any other person for your geographical area send them to me okay,
also you help help us to publish our company in your company very simple okay, go and start pasting it with this information stated below.
Hello.
Do you need personal or business loan without stress and fast
approval? If so, please contact us as we are now offering loans at
prime interest rate. Our loan is secured and safe, for more
information and applications, please reply to this e-mail.
[email protected]
Email: [email protected]
Name: SCAMMY MCSCAMMERTON
once again your job start now i want your story to change for better okay, you can also be posting it in your local site i will you to be fast about it, you can still be doing your present job and still continue with this especially people coming to your place of work send me their email okay.
this is a golden opportunity please accept it with good faith.
matt 7v7 ask and it shall be given seek and you will find knock and the door will be open okay,
i am man who FEAR GOD
hope to hear from you in regard this job, please i need result |
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_________________
x18
Roberto/Jonathan/Harry/Tony "OGUN GO KILL YOU FOR ROAD MANAGER CHIEF CHIEF CHIEF" |
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godbobdog
419Eater is my life
Joined: 28 Jun 2013
Posts: 274
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| Posted:
Tue Jul 15, 2014 4:42 pm |
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Meanwhile, Lenny continues his taunts:
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hey buttmuncher
i havent gotten a call yet from worthington. you better get your ass in gear and help me get that job back. you have until friday. then i get the $500 for myself and you will just have choke on a big pickle. |
The scammer at this point has been in contact with Jayhawk's lawyer and is confident that Lenny will be arrested:
| Quote: |
HEY FOOL
how are you doing, enjoy the money now because your end has come you will route in prison, fool you went to send $5 so that you can have the money gram information, fool you said you send $500.
i see you in prision for years for you to know your reason in hard way, foolish and greedy soul
fuck you and your family. |
| Quote: |
LISTEN UP
to your notice if worthington cannot arrest as i speck now, i have already seek a consultation form DR EZE TEMPLE, to cast a SPELL OF MADNESS ON YOU, SO THAT WHO WILL YOU LEARN YOUR LESSON IN A HARD WAY, YOU KNOW I AM FROM AFRICA YOU USE MY MONEY GOING TO PARTY WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND I PITY BOTH OF YOU,
TO YOUR NOTICE HE HAS GIVE YOU 4 DAY TO RETURN THE MONEY BUT YOU KNOW WHAT I AM NOT GREEDY AS YOU ARE
I WANT YOU TO SEND ME $1000 OUT OF THE $2000 BEFORE 4 DAY TIME IF YOU DISOBEY I HAVE YOUR CORRECT NAME AND YOUR PICTURE YOU, I WILL INSTRUCT DR. EZE TEMPLE TO CAST THE SPELL OF MADNESS ON YOU IMMEDIATELY.
YOUR NAME, PICTURE IS ALREADY IN THE TEMPLE 4 DAY GRACE FOR YOU TO RETURN MY MONEY |
Lenny is unimpressed:
| Quote: |
hey fuckface
it looks like that dumb ass witch doctor threw the spell on the wrong person. hes driven you batshit crazy.
instead of getting me my job back like you promised, youve been sucking your own dick and visiting witch doctors. so i just went to moneygram and got back the $500 i was going to send you. rhonda and i spent the whole night snorting blow and fucking. now with your money we will buy some more blow and party the whole day. hahahahahahaaaaa. do you enjoy the taste of your own dick? |
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hey shitforbrains
i caught that pussy roommate of mine sending email to you. so i punched him in the face and then kicked him in the balls several times. then i beat him up bad. do you like hearing that? i bet you get excited when you hear about one man touching another man in the balls. it must really suck to be a homosexual in africa. thats why you are going so crazy. they had to take my roommate to the hospital. hes such a pussy that he told them he tripped and fell. |
| Quote: |
Fuck you
With your details I have 4day time if you did not send me my money I will instrut DR EZE to cast spell of madness on YOU.
Fuck off you are already in the mood of madness fool. That is why are you are unstable now you will remain restless crazy until you return my money. |
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hey buttpacker
i just went to moneygram and got my $500 back. i got some more blow for rhonda. it makes her hungry for my cock. almost as hungry as you get for your own cock. do you like taking it up the ass? do you like little cocks that dont hurt you much or are you a real man and like big big cocks up your ass? do you like getting tied up and spanked by big black guys? i should get rhonda a strap-on so she could fuck you up the ass. then you would finally know what it is like to have sex with a woman. i think all youve had are men and boys. how many little boys have you fucked? lots i bet. you are one sick guy, robert. sick sick sick. |
| Quote: |
go to hell with the $5 you paid and you fuck liar say its $500
fuck you and your generation i know all this? |
| Quote: |
hey cumbubble
that witch doctor must have made you crazy. or maybe it is all that jacking off you do. you need to find a girlfriend. what the fuck are you talking about with this 5$ shit? all i know is that you should have talked to banker to get me my job back but you went to a con-man witch doctor instead. that means you get no money and i get more money.
and nobody will arrest me hahahaha. when are you going to call the fbi? you are one stupid dumb *DELETED*. |
(And they trade uncreative insults for awhile.)
| Quote: |
hey sugar booger
you once said you loved me so i know you still have feelings for me. i slept for 14 hours last night after partying with rhonda all day all night and all day again. that girl has a nose like a vacuum cleaner and her mouth is pretty good too. we need to go score some more blow. i love going through money like this. i never knew the criminal life was so fun. you should teach me more. im already scheming where ill get my next batch of money. take it easy there guy. i hope you are getting enough cocks up your ass to make you happy. |
| Quote: |
| ARE YOU READY TO RETURN PART OF MY MONEY TO ME? |
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_________________
x18
Roberto/Jonathan/Harry/Tony "OGUN GO KILL YOU FOR ROAD MANAGER CHIEF CHIEF CHIEF" |
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Jayhawk
Baiting Guru
Joined: 07 Jul 2006
Posts: 5727
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| Posted:
Tue Jul 15, 2014 7:11 pm |
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The lawyer is somewhat psychotic, and I have been sending him tons of insults. Here's one of my favorites:
You're swine. You're a vulgar little maggot. Don't you even have the slightest clue as to how pathetic you are? You worthless bag of filth. As they say in Texas, I'll bet you couldn't pour piss out of a boot with instructions on the heel. You are a canker. A sore that won't go away. A cock-wart. You are a fiend and a coward, and you have horrible breath. You are degenerate, noxious; basically, an ideal fuking moron. I feel debased just for knowing you exist. I despise everything about you. You are a bloody nardless newbie twit protohominid chromosomally aberrant caricature of a coprophagic local parasitic pond scum and I wish you would just go away.
If this were Sparta, you would have been cast to death at birth. You're a putrescence mass, a walking vomit. You are a spineless little worm deserving nothing but the profoundest contempt. You are a jerk, a cad, a weasel, a waste of MY oxygen. Your life is a monument to stupidity. You are a stench, a revulsion, a big suck on a sour lemon. You are a bleating fool, a curdled staggering mutant dwarf smeared richly with the effluvia and offal accompanying your alleged birth into this world. An insensate, blinking calf, meaningful to nobody, abandoned by the puke-drooling, giggling beasts who sired you and then killed themselves in recognition of what they had done.
I will never get over the embarrassment of belonging to the same species as you. You are a monster, an ogre, a malformity. I barf at the very thought of you. You have all the appeal of a paper cut. Lepers avoid you. You are vile, worthless, less than nothing. You are a weed, a fungus, the dregs of this earth. And did I mention that you smell?
If you aren't an idiot, you made a world-class effort at simulating one.
You snail-skulled little rabbit. Would that a hawk pick you up, drive its beak into your brain, and upon finding it rancid set you loose to fly briefly before spattering the ocean rocks with the frothy pink shame of your ignoble blood. May you choke on the queasy, convulsing nausea of your own trite, foolish beliefs.
You are weary, stale, flat and unprofitable. You are grimy, squalid, nasty and profane. You are foul and disgusting. You're a fool, an ignoramus. Monkeys look down on you. Even goats won't have sex with you. You are unreservedly pathetic, starved for attention, and lost in a land that reality forgot.
You are a waste of flesh. You have no rhythm. You are ridiculous and obnoxious. You are the moral equivalent of a leech. You are a living emptiness, a meaningless void. You are sour and senile. You are a disease, you puerile one-handed slack-jawed drooling meatslapper.
On a good day you're a half-wit. You remind me of drool. You are deficient in all that lends character. You have the personality of wallpaper. You are dank and filthy. You are asinine and benighted. You are the source of all unpleasantness. You spread misery and sorrow wherever you go.
I cannot believe how incredibly stupid you are. I mean rock-hard stupid. Dehydrated-rock-hard stupid. Stupid so stupid that it goes way beyond the stupid we know into a whole different dimension of stupid. You are trans-stupid stupid. Meta-stupid. Stupid collapsed on itself so far that even the neutrons have collapsed. Stupid gotten so dense that no intellect can escape. Singularity stupid. Blazing hot mid-day sun on Mercury stupid. You emit more stupid in one second than our entire galaxy emits in a year. Quasar stupid. Nothing in our universe can really be this stupid. Perhaps this is some primordial fragment from the original big bang of stupid. Some pure essence of a stupid so uncontaminated by anything else as to be beyond the laws of physics that we know. I'm sorry. I can't go on. This is an epiphany of stupid for me.
The only thing worse than your logic is your manners.
P.S.: You are hypocritical, greedy, violent, malevolent, vengeful, cowardly, deadly, mendacious, meretricious, loathsome, despicable, belligerent, opportunistic, barratrous, contemptible, criminal, fascistic, bigoted, racist, sexist, avaricious, tasteless, idiotic, brain-damaged, imbecilic, insane, arrogant, deceitful, demented, lame, self-righteous, byzantine, conspiratorial, satanic, fraudulent, libellous, bilious, splenetic, spastic, ignorant, clueless, illegitimate, harmful, destructive, dumb, evasive, double-talking, devious, revisionist, narrow, manipulative, paternalistic, fundamentalist, dogmatic, idolatrous, unethical, cultic, diseased, suppressive, controlling, restrictive, malignant, deceptive, dim, crazy, weird, dystopic, stifling, uncaring, plantigrade, grim, unsympathetic, jargon-spouting, censorious, secretive, aggressive, mind-numbing, arassive, poisonous, flagrant, self-destructive, abusive, socially-retarded, puerile, clueless, and generally Not Good.
(Thank goodness for the NSFW tag)  |
_________________
x8  < slacking?
just checked the site for update now, shipment smurfs in Porto Novo. Yes!! - Stanley
i will not share my smurfs with anybody again - Stanley (again)
Yes pets are allowed as far as you will occupy the apartment alone, you can release the Kraken.
i will kill you even if it take me to go to jail i will do that because i hate you with all my life....
assisin killer to Feathers McGraw
PLEASE I BEG YOU TO LET ME KNOW THAT PIGGIES OF YOURS PLEASE... assisin killer to Feathers again
x5 Team Humphere
Long Live Silver Peak Orphanage! - Loan Lad Langwenya Andile |
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BS57
*** BANNED ***
Joined: 12 May 2011
Posts: 141
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| Posted:
Wed Jul 16, 2014 3:49 am |
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epic rant!
got any use for a maga from Germany? I'm testing out using google translate to play with a simple lotto in German, the possibilities for confusion and de-education are endless. The errors just get compounded every time, I write less than perfect English, use Google Translate to German, they use google translate back into whatever language and it gets funnier to read at every step...
Lemme know, "Broom Hilda" could use some practice, she's fresh and young and looking for some action! |
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godbobdog
419Eater is my life
Joined: 28 Jun 2013
Posts: 274
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| Posted:
Wed Jul 16, 2014 4:00 am |
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Thanks. For purposes of this bait, I need the maga to live specifically in Montana. I'm sure a German would fit right in. |
_________________
x18
Roberto/Jonathan/Harry/Tony "OGUN GO KILL YOU FOR ROAD MANAGER CHIEF CHIEF CHIEF" |
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BS57
*** BANNED ***
Joined: 12 May 2011
Posts: 141
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Wed Jul 16, 2014 4:23 am |
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Ya think? I'd like to get some practice with the character living in Germany, I have some theories I'd like to test drive. Just thought I'd make the offer, have fun! |
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Jayhawk
Baiting Guru
Joined: 07 Jul 2006
Posts: 5727
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| Posted:
Wed Jul 16, 2014 12:19 pm |
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Couldn't Broom Hilda be a German nanny living in Montanta and taking care of some rich brats? She doesn't speak english very well, but she does know all the words to Edelweiss, which sealed the deal. |
_________________
x8 < slacking?
just checked the site for update now, shipment smurfs in Porto Novo. Yes!! - Stanley
i will not share my smurfs with anybody again - Stanley (again)
Yes pets are allowed as far as you will occupy the apartment alone, you can release the Kraken.
i will kill you even if it take me to go to jail i will do that because i hate you with all my life....
assisin killer to Feathers McGraw
PLEASE I BEG YOU TO LET ME KNOW THAT PIGGIES OF YOURS PLEASE... assisin killer to Feathers again
x5 Team Humphere
Long Live Silver Peak Orphanage! - Loan Lad Langwenya Andile |
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loualsindor
Elite Baiter
Joined: 23 Mar 2012
Posts: 1999
Location: A little rock in a big ocean
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| Posted:
Wed Jul 16, 2014 6:24 pm |
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Turdburgler?
That ones going right into the arsenal, no doubt.
Epic run you're having with this one, well done. |
_________________
- 229
X 6
X 5
X 1
Budapest/Fiji - 22,500 miles
Save, Collines, Benin/Victoria Island, Nigeria - 448 miles on a bus
Save, Collines, Benin/Accra, Ghana - 700 miles on a bus
Evil Attorney epics - 22
- Why do you give shit about who i scammed you have to stop sticking ur nose on my shoes. Because it doesn't fit your noses
- Please bring me back before i hit my brain on a pan.
- This business is not like selling shoes and clothes in the market sir.
* Help Keep Eater Running - Click here to donate |
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bware419ers
419Eater Admin
Joined: 25 Jun 2012
Posts: 21219
Location: Searching for the Platinum Piggie
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| Posted:
Wed Jul 16, 2014 7:46 pm |
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| godbobdog wrote: |
| OK. I'll cave in. In real life, I used Moneygram to send $5 to a friend just to see how it works. Also, I got a real life reference number out of it, which I now use. |
Please do not do this! This could be used by the lad to scam other victims. While it is more difficult to do so via Moneygram, it is not impossible. A simple phone call in the US can confirm it is a valid transfer. Do not give them something they can reuse! |
_________________
| SCAMWARNERS | PREMIUM | REQUIRED READING | REPORT BANK ACCOUNTS | FOLLOW 419EATER ON TWITTER
  X 7035
 X 17
 "FFS." - Capone
- Toomuchfun
- Irishemigrant
"I started to read it but got bored after the first couple of sentences." - SOOI
"Remind me not to get on your bad side." - jose_cuervo |
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godbobdog
419Eater is my life
Joined: 28 Jun 2013
Posts: 274
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| Posted:
Wed Jul 16, 2014 8:27 pm |
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Thanks. As soon as the scammer announced that he knew the transfer was for only $5, I knew I'd probably screwed up. |
_________________
x18
Roberto/Jonathan/Harry/Tony "OGUN GO KILL YOU FOR ROAD MANAGER CHIEF CHIEF CHIEF" |
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godbobdog
419Eater is my life
Joined: 28 Jun 2013
Posts: 274
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Wed Jul 16, 2014 8:29 pm |
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This evening, I will probably create a couple of new email accounts, giving me some new magas to work with. So far, this guy has interacted with seven imaginary characters. This is much more complex than the simple baits I typically try. |
_________________
x18
Roberto/Jonathan/Harry/Tony "OGUN GO KILL YOU FOR ROAD MANAGER CHIEF CHIEF CHIEF" |
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Jayhawk
Baiting Guru
Joined: 07 Jul 2006
Posts: 5727
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| Posted:
Thu Jul 17, 2014 3:36 pm |
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This lad typed out all the happened to him
Too bad that it must be handwritten (which he was told, but ignored). Btw, the bank account given is obviously a fake, so no personal information was included. Feel free to join in, as this lad needs some serious hurt. 
btw, at no time did Jones admit to being a member of A1-Bundy. I planted that idea in the lads head and after quite a bit of prodding he ran with it.
edit to add - After reading this more closely, I can say that this little guy was probably let down.
 |
_________________
x8 < slacking?
just checked the site for update now, shipment smurfs in Porto Novo. Yes!! - Stanley
i will not share my smurfs with anybody again - Stanley (again)
Yes pets are allowed as far as you will occupy the apartment alone, you can release the Kraken.
i will kill you even if it take me to go to jail i will do that because i hate you with all my life....
assisin killer to Feathers McGraw
PLEASE I BEG YOU TO LET ME KNOW THAT PIGGIES OF YOURS PLEASE... assisin killer to Feathers again
x5 Team Humphere
Long Live Silver Peak Orphanage! - Loan Lad Langwenya Andile |
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godbobdog
419Eater is my life
Joined: 28 Jun 2013
Posts: 274
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Thu Jul 17, 2014 4:30 pm |
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Well done, Jayhawk. That's a reasonably accurate description of the pain he's going through. (I said nothing about a duck, though.)
Last night, one of my characters, the aforementioned RU553L P4N3LL0 got an invitation to try again for a loan. I also invented a new maga.
| Quote: |
Hi There!
My friend Cat told me you loan money. He's SUCH a cutie! I wish he wasn't so bashful lol. He's got such dreamy eyes. I want to open up a boutique. I have to go all the way to Billings to buy nice dresses and that's SUCH a pain. So I think I can make a lot of money selling dresses and jewelry here. What do you think? How much money do you think it will take me to get started? Oooooh!!! I'm so EXCITED! Will you be able to lend me some money?
Hugs and kisses,
Milly |
Also, I happened to wake up at about 3:30 this morning and dashed off a quick foreshadowing of a dollar chop from Lenny. In response to the lad's
| Quote: |
fuck uuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu |
I wrote:
| Quote: |
hey dumbass
thats no way to talk to your future partner. you should be sucking my dick some more. you are a slow learner. |
A few hours later, he produced the above gem. Too bad it was supposed to be hand-written. |
_________________
x18
Roberto/Jonathan/Harry/Tony "OGUN GO KILL YOU FOR ROAD MANAGER CHIEF CHIEF CHIEF" |
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Tsnerd
Not quite a Newb
Joined: 14 Jul 2005
Posts: 41
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| Posted:
Thu Jul 17, 2014 4:37 pm |
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Pretty sure that's a goose, Bob. |
_________________
Fakers: many, many, lots; an SSL and a couple of Resellers.
x 6
AH, AH, AH! Two little ! |
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Jayhawk
Baiting Guru
Joined: 07 Jul 2006
Posts: 5727
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| Posted:
Thu Jul 17, 2014 4:44 pm |
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^^^ Maybe that's why it didn't get sucked.  |
_________________
x8 < slacking?
just checked the site for update now, shipment smurfs in Porto Novo. Yes!! - Stanley
i will not share my smurfs with anybody again - Stanley (again)
Yes pets are allowed as far as you will occupy the apartment alone, you can release the Kraken.
i will kill you even if it take me to go to jail i will do that because i hate you with all my life....
assisin killer to Feathers McGraw
PLEASE I BEG YOU TO LET ME KNOW THAT PIGGIES OF YOURS PLEASE... assisin killer to Feathers again
x5 Team Humphere
Long Live Silver Peak Orphanage! - Loan Lad Langwenya Andile |
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Tsnerd
Not quite a Newb
Joined: 14 Jul 2005
Posts: 41
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Thu Jul 17, 2014 4:55 pm |
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You are saying the lad is a geesist? 
Damn geeists. |
_________________
Fakers: many, many, lots; an SSL and a couple of Resellers.
x 6
AH, AH, AH! Two little ! |
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TheFae
Baiting Guru
Joined: 15 Jun 2009
Posts: 14291
Location: Playing Space in the Street - DECENT!
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| Posted:
Thu Jul 17, 2014 5:03 pm |
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OMG, my office mates are looking at me funny, wondering why I am surfering a sudden fit of giggles. Well done, GBD and Jay! 
ETA: Love the latin phrase. |
_________________
 x 4    x 5 x 6
                  
                x 3,000+
GO GOLD! **CLICKY**
"This is really bad"
"my account has been disable and can not sell anymore and this is all i live on" |
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Jayhawk
Baiting Guru
Joined: 07 Jul 2006
Posts: 5727
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| Posted:
Thu Jul 17, 2014 5:09 pm |
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I guess the good news is that we can add a charge of soliciting sex for water fowl against Jones. That Jones is one sick dude, and the courts do not take kindly to animal abuse.  |
_________________
x8 < slacking?
just checked the site for update now, shipment smurfs in Porto Novo. Yes!! - Stanley
i will not share my smurfs with anybody again - Stanley (again)
Yes pets are allowed as far as you will occupy the apartment alone, you can release the Kraken.
i will kill you even if it take me to go to jail i will do that because i hate you with all my life....
assisin killer to Feathers McGraw
PLEASE I BEG YOU TO LET ME KNOW THAT PIGGIES OF YOURS PLEASE... assisin killer to Feathers again
x5 Team Humphere
Long Live Silver Peak Orphanage! - Loan Lad Langwenya Andile |
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B8er
Associate Boomdazzler
Joined: 16 Feb 2009
Posts: 13579
Location: In self-isolation practicing social distancing
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| Posted:
Thu Jul 17, 2014 5:25 pm |
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| Tsnerd wrote: |
| Pretty sure that's a goose, Bob. |
Not according to Google it isn't http://goo.gl/weQsgc, and we all know that Google never lies. |
_________________
"I DENOUNCE THE MUFFIN MEN" - Ma Kim
"YOU ARE WALKING DEAD MAN. YOUR WOODEN COFFIN IS READY TO SWALLOW YOU AND YOUR DIRTY GENERATION"
"all chaps are ass-less by design otherwise they just be leather pants" - jose_cuervo
x 5 
            x 335  🚽
 x 4 x 1746 x 1904 - Fake cheques: $4,392,620.83
Team Woody - Ghana to Singapore - 11535km |
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