OMG the NSA!

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Posted: Mon Oct 19, 2009 10:40 am

Captain Mal has been at loggerheads with the FBI and the EFCC for a while now. So, the Lads brought in the National Security Agency! (emphasis added)

Quote:

We are American's alliance prospect, attached to the world bank group, and federal bureau of investigation, we minimize the excesses of crime, most importantly, monetary movement from Nigeria and united kingdom to the united states of America. Sir/Madam this is to notify you that we have giving you more seven working days extension to provide the required documents demanded from you for proper certification of your fund . We work in affiliation with FBI and carry out the required duty as mandated by FBI Washington dc, we need the below stated document as stated by Fbi memo sent to u

Diplomatic immunity seal of transfer (dist)

If after this grace, you do not get back to us with the above listed document, we shall consider this money as an act of terrorism, money laundering and drug trafficking. Our security men will then head to your City to apprehend you and bring you in for further interrogation.Contact john fr33man via email xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx for proper briefing and acquisation of dist doc

Now Captain Mal is no lover of Feds:

Quote:

As a taxpayer and retired Marine Corps officer, veteran of Operation Iraqi Freedom, twice decorated with the Bronze Star and bearer of three Purple Hearts, I am telling you to focus on fighting The War Against Terror and stay out of my business! I have sent the money to Mr Mue11er to settle the fee for the DIST as I do not believe that John Fr33man of the EFCC could micro-manage a lemonade stand, and for some reason Mr Mue11er said he was unable to collect the money, which is sheer gorram horsepuckey. How am I to blame for his apparent stupidity?
Feel free to arrest me because I have the documentation to prove that I made every effort to pay the fee and I will sue and I will win.

Posted: Mon Oct 19, 2009 12:17 pm

I always think its most decent of them that they tip you off that they will be coming to arrest you Smile

Posted: Mon Oct 19, 2009 1:27 pm

You're really in trouble now. Laughing

Elite Baiter Joined: 19 Jan 2009 Posts: 1440

Quote:

Our security men will then head to your City

And what city would that be? Rolling Eyes

Posted: Mon Oct 19, 2009 3:19 pm

I'm trying to figure out how you can consider money as an 'act', even more puzzling is that they're planning to consider it as an act of terrorism, money laundering and drug trafficking...

I'd leave the city if I were you...

Posted: Tue Oct 20, 2009 12:21 am

When in trouble with the FBI and other international organizations, Mr Smith Martins, in his capacity of a Barrister of the highest calipler, will intercede on your behalf for a share of the cash, and a date Very Happy

Posted: Tue Oct 20, 2009 10:43 am

Well, well... the NSA seems to have dropped the threats for now:

Quote:

Could you please, kindly forward the full payment information of US$950 you made in the Name of the Director of Federal Bureau Of Investigation (FBI) (R0B3RT MU3LL3R) immediately to us for record purposes, and then we will help track the money as you directed please.
Thank while waiting for the full information as soon as you receives this mail now.

Mal still doesn't like the Alliance - oops, I mean the Feds:

Quote:

I didn't ask you to get involved; nor did I ask you to ask as Mr Mue11er's gorram nursemaid; so I suggest that you get on with your job, which is National Security after all, and stay out of this business.