HALLELUJAGOBBLE! Seamugu's tattoo, safari & arrest!

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Posted: Wed Oct 04, 2006 4:52 pm

u kidding? Homer is never sober. You picked a very unreliable man to answer your calls! Laughing

Posted: Wed Oct 04, 2006 5:30 pm

Whart are ye talking about matey? I'm as jober as a sudge!

Posted: Wed Oct 04, 2006 7:21 pm

I just sent him this:

Quote:

Dear Austine,

I just heard from Captain Pugwash, on the SS Riskyfree. Becuse he has
to take some members out from Accra to the MV Freekowtski as well on
Saturday, he will be in Lagos Harbour ONLY between 3pm and 5pm
Saturday.

You can call him on his sattelite phone, The number is a USA code
(because the sattelite company is based in Toledo, Ohio) I think from
Nigeria you have to ring 0091 for the USA, then 419-xxxxxx. Don't
call him until 3pm, or you will waste your credit. Because of the
tides, he HAS to leave by 5pm.He is unlikely to call you, though I
have passed on your number. To be honest, I dont think he knows how,
though he is a very good sailor.

He is very wary of strangers, and picking up an imposter, and suggests
that so he can clearly see the Church tattoo, you stand on the
quayside with your shirt off, and shout 'Hallelujagobble!' to him.
Then he knows he is dealing with the right person.

He will take you to the MV Freekowtski, where Captain Scarlet and his
Angels Harmony, Symphony, Melody, Destiny and Rhapsody will look after
you for the voyage to England.

Hallelujagobble!

Brother Roy

Captain Pugwash has been briefed, the idea is to make him run around frantically, half naked, shouting 'Hallelujagobble!' at strange boats until a drunken Pugwash sinks/gets arrested/leaves without him, I leave that to you, HJF!

Lad is then stranded 220 miles from home. Ahhh! Crying or Very sad

Master Baiter Joined: 21 Jul 2005 Posts: 137

'Captain Pugwash' ha ha ha .....

I am really looking forward to Saturday - if only we could get this on video it would be priceless.

Great job.

Posted: Wed Oct 04, 2006 9:58 pm

Oh man, how I wish I could be at that port Saturday afternoon!

Posted: Wed Oct 04, 2006 10:32 pm

I'd rather be Horatio McAllister, but Pugwash would do.

Hello I'm New here! Joined: 01 Oct 2006 Posts: 7

omg, you are such a bastard Twisted Evil

Posted: Thu Oct 05, 2006 9:09 am

Damn, HJF, thats 2 days running I've learned something from you. I would've chosen Captain Horatio McCallister, only I'd no idea that's his real name. I'm so sad I know Apu's second name is Nahasapeemapetilon, and what the 'J' in Homer's name stands for, but I alwys thought the Captain was just called 'the Sea Captain'. Rolling Eyes

Pugwash is a proper pirate, but he does sound a bit camp. Still, the email's gone now. Tell you what, Homer, be Pugwash, but sound like Cpt. H McC!

Quote:

"Yarr, I don't know what I'm doin'."

Best not tell him you have 2 glass eyes, though!

Must go, I've a new Seamugu on the hook!

Quote:

Dear Brother Roy,
Goodmorning and thank you for your candid email to
serve. Please am interested and will like to have your
visa form.

I sincerely agree to the terms. Looking forward to
hear from you.

GAIUS

Posted: Fri Oct 06, 2006 4:30 pm

man you doing a great job with this, next time you should tell him a priest life is very humble work and thus he should not bring any money with him for they will not allow it on the boat?

Do you think that would work. they you could get him stranded

Posted: Fri Oct 06, 2006 4:35 pm

I did suggest he wouldnt need money or luggage, he doesnt seem to have much cash anyway.

I'm worried that I havent heard from him since Wednesday, though he may well be in transit, and therefore be unable to check his email. Maybe he has told his mommy, who knows who Captain Pugwash is, or something...

We'll find out soon (or not, but he'll always have his 'Conman' tattoo.. Very Happy

).

419Eater is my life Joined: 06 Oct 2005 Posts: 277

I do hope the ship doesnt sink! That would really upset the Sea Mugu!

Posted: Sat Oct 07, 2006 1:54 pm

The Captain Pugwash line is open! A shame I got into a wee but too much grog earlier today.

419Eater is my life Joined: 25 Aug 2006 Posts: 403

Anchors aweigh Mateys.... Avast.... Is that an Iceberg off the port of Accra? Sure hope that Capt. Pugwash can avoid it.

Posted: Sat Oct 07, 2006 3:25 pm

He's in Lagos! I had to call him though, but at this point he's looking for the ship.

http://members.419eater.com/~homerjfong/pugwash-calls-him.mp3

Posted: Sat Oct 07, 2006 4:18 pm

I do believe the lad is lost.

http://members.419eater.com/~homerjfong/pugwash-calls-him-again.mp3

Posted: Sat Oct 07, 2006 5:06 pm

Hallelujagobble! Laughing

Thanks for that HJF. I honestly thought that rats had been smelt, and the lad wasn't coming. Hopefully he's still running round the harbour with his shirt waving over his head.

The Riskyfree and the Freekowtski have sailed without him. Crying or Very sad

Shame they wont be back for many weeks, Maybe we can get him back for a repeat performance.

Poor lad thought that by now he would be steaming away, looked after by Capt Scarlet and the Angels....

Posted: Sat Oct 07, 2006 7:47 pm

At this point, no messages have been left on the Captain's voice mail. Would ye object to another phone call to him, yelling at him for not being at the ship?

Preferably at about 3am Nigerian time, when Captain Pugwash has returned from the Freekowtski and is sloshed beyond all recognition?

Posted: Sun Oct 08, 2006 10:11 am

Any time you like, Homer, he hasnt emailed Brother Roy yet, so we don't know where he be. Arrr!

Posted: Sun Oct 08, 2006 10:37 am

HJF what a classic call. I love the "do ye have bilgewater in ye ears" line Laughing

Master Baiter Joined: 13 Jul 2005 Posts: 186 Location: GA

Quote:

The one being tattooed later became 'Christ on a Bike'.

One of my favorites!

I'm looking forward to the hate mail you're gonna get over this one...

Posted: Mon Oct 09, 2006 3:46 pm

I can't believe the tatoo is so bad. My 4-yr old writes better than that.

Posted: Mon Oct 09, 2006 7:30 pm

Sadly, they let him go again, but this is hilarious - Hallebleedinlujagobble!

Quote:

so much pain
Dear brother Roy,
yes am a full member of the church with extra faith and committment,but why won`t i have extra happiness,for real brother Roy the lagos habour you told me to go was a place i found out that terrorist attacked and Robbed goods in the ship few days ago,thats why security was strictly there,i later bought my way in from the police man that told me about what happened few days ago.and also adivce me to always hide my self while looking around b/cos i told him that i only wanted to witness how ship looks like(which is a lie)then am in since 3.00pm kept calling pugwash number but no picking,i was worried although in every little time i came out from my hiding place to look around i coundn`t notice any riskyfree ship till when the time was going to 5.00pm i got a call from pugwash asking me to come around to lagos habour i told him that am coming not that am not there already,but when i came out from my hiding place i didn`t see any thing like him i still went back b/4 i got his second call when he said that he was about to leave the country that i should show up fast i only pleaded that he shouldn`t leave without me.immediately i didn`t knew what came over me i walked out openly with my shirt off and as God just had it,within a short time i notice a ship like riskyfree including three white men with white Tshirt then i started shouting HALLELUJAGOBBLE but none of them notice me,i felt bad and still strong in mind.immediately police arrested me due to the shouting,later they asked me my mission to the habour,i told them that i really wanted to witness how ships looks like,they searched me but they couldn`t see any evidence against me and @ the same time they accused me as one of the terrorist but when the first police man heard what is going on he pleaded on my behalf that since they dont have any evidence,they should let me go,so after few mins i was released when it was already night.actually i dont know any body in that city,not even a place to stay or money to get back to my city.i became fustrated and i started doing what u can not believe (begging money in the street)that later lead me back to my city,
Honestly Brother Roy i started this b/cos i trusted you even when i dont know your face and also the impression u put in me about the church but if you can understand me for once ley the church fulfill the promises they made to me as soon as i draw the tattoo membership.then when i have my way to UK.i will show the whole members of the church that 14 days is too much for me to involve more than 10 new members in my country,this is a promise i will never live to relax till i fulfill it,reply as soon as possible.
HALLELUJAGOBBLE
Austine

F*cking Priceless!

Posted: Mon Oct 09, 2006 8:00 pm

That is f*^king incredible! I simply love that last letter, could just imagine that lad standing with his bare badly tattoed chest screaming his lungs out at the 'white men on the risky free'. Would love to read the statement he gave to the police. I think they added drug use to the charges after hearing that story Laughing