Fishy business still going strong.

By joining our community you will have the ability to post topics and access other forums reserved for members. Registration is quick, simple and absolutely free. Join our community today by clicking here.

Elite Baiter Joined: 30 Apr 2017 Posts: 1055

^ I'll not hold my breath, and there's not much to loose by trying.

Just now

Quote:

Elastic my dear

Are you okay? I'm worried that I haven't heard back from you. Anyway, I just thought I would let you know that Fish Lad has been in touch and the emails he sent seem to indicate that he may be receptive to the offer I was prepared to present him with. Well, I sent the offer earlier this morning and hopefully Fish Lad is giving some serious consideration as I write this. All of us here at the warehouse hope that there will be a satisfactory outcome to all of this once Fish Lad replies. I will of course keep you updated, but I really can't see Fish Lad turning down what's been proposed.

Toodle-pip

Cyril

Elite Baiter Joined: 30 Apr 2017 Posts: 1055

Well, things went as I expected yesterday, but do I detect there may still be hope or am I reading to much in to Fish Lad's last email of the day.

Fish Lad 12:44

Quote:

You are very stupid, I will not do any work for you again since you don't want to pay me my money and for your information if I didn't see the money tomorrow morning, bet me you will join my four father's I promise you that

Cyril 14:14

Quote:

Fish Lad

Come, come my friend, let us not resort to silly name calling, I'm trying my hardest hear to find a solution to the problem we face that will allow us both to part with our dignity intact. On my part I will feel that I did not just hand over all of the money due to your threats you've made. And for your part you'll not only have all of you're money and the package, but you'll also have that nice warm fuzzy feeling that doing something nice for the little orphans will surely give you.

Toodle-pip

Cyril

Fish Lad 14:19

Quote:

I don't want i,t all I want is my money tomorrow or you will not see next month i swear

Cyril 16:14

Quote:

Fish Lad

Look my friend, I'm trying to help you here. It's should be obvious by now that your brother and that stupid bitch he intends to marry really aren't up to the simple job you gave them. I don't know what regiment of the British Army she's told you serves in, but I'm beginning to suspect it's not military intelligence. However, let us put your brother and the bitches short comings aside and try to sort this out. So let's forget the package for the moment and concentrate on the money problem. The way I see it this can all be sorted out quite simply by you doing as I ask. After all I'm bending over backwards here to try to make things as simple as possible for you yet all you seem to want to do is send me threat after threat. I would have thought by now you would have realised that's not going to get us anywhere, and I think we both want an end to this constant bickering. All you need to do is send the photograph that I've requested and this can all be over.

Toodle-pip

Cyril

Fish Lad 20:50

Quote:

You are very stupid am not going to send you any photo and I gave you grace yesterday and you fell it I will tell you that am a bad man

Then 20:51

Quote:

How much is the all the money total

Elite Baiter Joined: 30 Apr 2017 Posts: 1055

Let's see if today brings anything new.

Cyril 06:14

Quote:

Fish Lad

How are you this morning? Sorry I'm only just replying to your last email, but it was Linda's and my own night when we were both off on the guard duty rota at the same time so we thought that we would use the time to catch up on some well deserved rumpy pumpy down in the stock room. Anyway, I'm sure you don't want to hear about our sexual needs so let's get back to the business in hand. I'm sorry, but I'm having a little trouble understanding what it is you exactly want to do about the Santa photo. Most of your emails yesterday seemed to suggest you would not dress up as Father Christmas to make the orphans happy, but then the last email you sent was asking how much in total your 20% of the profits now stood at. Why do you want to know that if you're not going to send the photograph? I thought I had made it clear, no photo, no money. I also thought I had made it quite clear that all of us here in the warehouse are prepared to stay here for as long as it takes. I'm sure your brother must have sent you a report about the delivery from Bensons Beds we received yesterday, that was a dozen bunk beds being delivered. So, as you can see we are making ourselves as comfortable as possible and won't be leaving any time soon. I'll wait to hear what you have to say, but please try to refrain from more idle threats, they only makes things difficult between us.

Toodle-pip

Cyril

Cyril 08:19

Quote:

Elastic my dear

I have to tell you I'm becoming ever more worried about your continuing silence. I hope you're able to read this and something terrible hasn't happened to you. Anyway, I'll assume for the moment there is a rational explanation for your silence and do as I promised and keep you up to date with how things are progressing. I'm afraid the news I have to convey is a little short on facts because at the moment I'm not sure if Fish Lad is accepting my offer or not. The fool seems to spend most of his time asking for his money while in the same breath threatening Linda and I with dire consequences should I not send it. I really don't understand the fool, I give him what most reasonable people would consider an easy way to solve everything and he throws it back in my face. Perhaps you can have a word with him if you're able to, he seems to think highly of you and I'm sure he would value your advice. Can you try to do that for me my dear? I really would like to have this whole mess sorted out by the weekend as there's a fireworks display on the village green that I promised Linda I would take her to and I really don't want her to have to wait another whole year.

Toodle-pip

Cyril

Elite Baiter Joined: 30 Apr 2017 Posts: 1055

The rest of yesterday and the start of today.

Miss Elastic 10:11

Quote:

See let me tell you, don't tell me you value your property more than your life

Cyril 10:45

Quote:

Elastic my dear

Thank God you're okay it's nice to hear from you, I was beginning to have a horrible feeling that I would never hear from you again. It's doubly nice that you seem so concerned for my safety, but you needn't worry because I can't really see Fish Lad's brother and his bitch actually succeeding with whatever it is their planning. It's been over a week now since we barricaded ourselves in the warehouse and despite Jakub and Akimbo making a couple of good sweeps of the surrounding area we have seen neither hide nor hair of the little rascals and the force Fish Lad claims they have with them. I beginning to think they are no longer out there, if they ever where, and that it was just one big trick by Fish Lad to get his hands on his money. What do you think my dear, is it safe for Linda and I to return to our cottage or should I give it a couple more days just to be on the safe side?

Toodle-pip

Cyril

Miss Elastic 11:33

Quote:

Go and send him his money am out of the matter so bye don't text me again nonsense

Cyril 14:57

Quote:

Elastic my dear

I'm not quite sure what you mean when you mention nonsense, but the decision as to whether any money is sent still rests with Fish Lad. I have heard nothing from him concerning the Santa photo so I can only assume he is out looking for a Santa costume as I write this. I will of course keep you informed of any progress made towards the happy conclusion of the predicament we have all found ourselves in.

Toodle-pip

Cyril

Fish Lad 23:54

Quote:

So you think you can eat my money just like that after all the good job I done for you, go and send me all my money tomorrow

Today

Miss Elastic 00:05

Quote:

Is better you go and send the money to Emmanuel if you don't want to have problem

Cyril is that desperation I detect in you email to Fish Lad?

Cyril 04:15

Quote:

Fish Lad

For fuck sake you're beginning to sound like a stuck record. I'm telling you for the last time there will be no money until you send me the photograph of yourself dressed as Santa. Do you think I have nothing better to do than waste my time on this matter? The very fact that I'm sitting here writing this should show that your brother and his bitch are never going to get hold of the money for you. Now send the fucking photograph tor the orphans Christmas cards before one of my competitors beats me to it. The only email from you I shall be replying to from now on is the one with the photograph attached, so if you ever want to see your money you'd better get it to me pronto.

Toodle-pip

Cyril

Cyril 04:23

Quote:

Elastic my dear

Thanks once again for your concern, but I've decided to stick to my guns and hold on to Fish Lad's money until he does the small thing I have asked of him. Hopefully he will eventually see sense and realise my offer really is the only option left open to him. As always I will keep you informed of any positive outcome, but I've just sent Fish Lad an email telling him that I will not reply to any email he sends me that does not meet my requirements.

Toodle-pip

Cyril

Elite Baiter Joined: 30 Apr 2017 Posts: 1055

Oh no! nothing more from Fish lad since he sent this yesertday morning. Can Fish Lad and Cyril's friendship truly be over?

Fish Lad 06:49

Quote:

Is okay I will not email you again, but get ready for me, since you think you are smart I will tell you that no one eat my money and go free you and that your Linda will hear from me soon, soon, soon.

Elite Baiter Joined: 30 Apr 2017 Posts: 1055

Well, Fish Lad may not want to speak to Cyril anymore, But at least Miss Elastic and now Fish Lad's little sister are willing to waste some time. Rolling Eyes

Cyril 04:55

Quote:

Elastic my dear

Terrible news. Fish Lad emailed me yesterday morning saying he would never contact me again, but he would be coming for Linda and I soon,soon,soon. Obviously you'd have thought one soon would have been bad enough to cause panic stations here at the warehouse, but two extra soons were totally uncalled for. However, if it was Fish Lad's plan to scare my loyal staff I'm afraid it's backfired on him. Those two extra soons have only gone toward strengthening our resolve not to give in to Fish Lad threats. Do you know when he'll be arriving? I should imagine we may still have a couple of days to bolster our defensive perimeter. Perhaps when Fish Lad arrives he may have calmed down a little and we'll be able to once again resume some kind of sensible dialogue to sort this all out. Wish us luck my dear, because at the moment it looks like the chance of ever getting your new laptop, phone and shoes is hanging by a thread.

Toodle-pip

Cyril

Miss Elastic 07:02

Quote:

I don't know anything about him so stop asking me because I don't want to put my sekf into problem

Cyril 08:00

Quote:

Elastic my dear

Okay I understand, I don't want you putting yourself in any danger, but could you give me Fish Lad's younger sisters email address. She always seems to know what Fish Lad's up to and perhaps she's a little more intelligent than her brothers and could help to sort this problem we all face out. Don't worry, I won't tell her how I found it I'll just say it was via a search of the Internet or something like that if she asks. Hope to hear from you soon.

Toodle-pip

Cyril

Miss Elastic 12:09

Quote:

If you know is good for you now go and send Fish Lad his money or you and that you Linda will see terrible things

Cyril 14:13

Quote:

Elastic my dear

Linda and I don't want to see terrible things, but we also can not send Fish Lad his money without him providing the photograph I asked him for. Did he tell you why I want it? I only want it to make the little black orphans at St Dismas orphanage happy on Christmas day. How can Fish Lad refuse such a small request, where's his Christmas spirit for Christ sake? You should have seen there little faces light up last year when Kunta Kinte who used to work here played Father Christmas and handed out the presents. Actually I think I may still have a couple of photographs of him somewhere I'll have a quick look before I hit send and I'll attach them if I can find them. Perhaps if Fish Lad hasn't left yet to come and take over from his incompetent brother you could show him the joy on the little orphans faces.

Found them.

Toodle-pip

Cyril

Miss Elastic 14:44

Quote:

How do you think he will send you another photos since you don't want to pay him the one he send to you

Little Sis 14:48

Quote:

Hello am Fish Lad's sister Elastic ask me to contact you

Posted: Thu Oct 31, 2019 6:00 pm

Exit fish lad, enter Little sis.
Rinse, repeat.

Keep it up. I'm sure you'll get that Santa pic!

Elite Baiter Joined: 30 Apr 2017 Posts: 1055

^ Not sure Cyril's going to live long enough, I missed this one. Laughing

Miss Elastic 14:46

Quote:

Do you think you are the only person that know how to eat peoples money Fish Lad will kill you and Linda if you don't make a peace with him soon

Elite Baiter Joined: 30 Apr 2017 Posts: 1055

I really hope Little Sis is going to be Cyril's very own Neville Chamberlain when or if it comes to peace talks.

Cyril 06:03

Quote:

Elastic my dear

Sorry for my late reply, I'm sure you must become frantic with worry every time I don't respond quickly, but you need to understand that we are under siege here and there are many things that require my attention. For instance, most of yesterday was spent organising extra outside flood lighting and setting up external motion sensors. Jed has been a great help arranging all of that and has even offered to give up his two week holiday he and his wife have booked in Teneriefe on the 3rd of November and join us all here at the warehouse. Of course I turned his kind offer down as hopefully all of this will be over by then, but it just goes to show the friendship and loyalty I inspire in everybody that knows me. That's why I find Fish Lad's actions so baffling, if we could just talk and sort this all out like men then perhaps we could avoid all of this unpleasantness. Anyway, thanks to you perhaps a new chapter in this whole sorry saga can begin. I am of course talking about your sterling work of getting Fish Lad's younger sister to contact me. Perhaps with her help I may be able to make Fish Lad see that violence is never the way to sort out minor business disputes. What's needed is calm and rational thought on what's causing the problem and as far as I'm concerned (ignoring all of this extra work and worry Fish Lad's causing) the only thing holding up a happy outcome is his refusal to send one little photograph. I'll let you know how I get on with Little Sis when I contact her, but right now I think it's time for a spot of breakfast.

Toodle-pip

Cyril

Cyril 09:32

Quote:

Little Sis my dear

Thanks for agreeing to contact me, and I hope you're not angry with Elastic for requesting you help us. It's just that the poor girl has been through so much lately waiting for your brother to sort out the problems surrounding the collection of the package that contains Elastic's new Laptop, phone and shoes that I thought I really must try to do something. I'm hoping you can help with that by trying to make your brother see sense and accept the generous and I think fair offer I have put forward. I'm not sure how much Fish Lad has told you of what has transpired over the almost nine months since we became acquainted, but knowing him I'm sure that you've only heard his side of the story where he has probably tried to paint me as the bad guy in all of this when all I have ever wanted to do was help him. Anyway, if you could let me know if you are willing to become the intermediary and perhaps peacemaker in this terrible and woeful tale that would probably bring tears to the Devils eyes then let me know. I don't for one minute think it will be an easy job, but I have a feeling if anyone can pull it off it will be you. Hope to hear from you soon.

Toodle-pip

Cyril

Elite Baiter Joined: 30 Apr 2017 Posts: 1055

Mayhap Cyril's getting nearer his goal. Rolling Eyes

Little Sis 14:37

Quote:

To be honest with you I don't think I can help you or any body in this issue because its going out of hand and my brother has diceded to do something bad and no one can stop him so I can't help you because I don't want to anything to happen to me

Miss Elastic 14:44

Quote:

Go and make a peace with him or you will be having problem every day

Cyril 17:51

Quote:

Little Sis my dear

Thanks for your honesty, I can't say that I'm not disappointed by your decision, but I do understand. I would never want you to put yourself in any danger when this really hasn't got anything to do with you. I was just hoping that you may have been able to guide Fish Lad away from doing anything that he may later regret. I guess all of us here in the warehouse will just have to sit tight and hope that your brother comes to appreciate the futility of trying to get what he wants by force. If you do decide to change your mind you have my email address so feel free to drop me a line.

Toodle-pip

Cyril

Little Sis 18:01

Quote:

Stop texting me go and pay my brother his money or you will have a very big problem that you will mot forget in your life

Cyril 18:26

Quote:

Little Sis my dear

I had hoped that you would have been a little more helpful, but I'll happily stop emailing you if that's what you really want. As I've already said, I don't want you putting yourself in any danger over all of this. As for paying your brother, the ball is still in his court, all he has to do to sort this all out is send the photograph I require I then see no reason why Fish Lad's money can't be on it's way.

Toodle-pip

Cyril

Cyril 18:28

Quote:

Elastic my dear

I guess I should let you know that Fish Lad's younger sister has said she is unable to help because once Fish Lad has made his mind up about something there is very little anyone can do about it. That was obviously worrying news, but what was even more worrying was that his sister actually seemed to fear that Fish Lad would do something bad to her. What kind of man is it that would harm his own sister just because she dare suggest he send the photograph I requested?

Toodle pip

Cyril

Miss Elastic 18:31

Quote:

I told you to stop emailing me go and se d the money to Fish Lad if you want peace in your life

Cyril 18:48

Quote:

Elastic my dear

You too? Little Sis just told me the same thing and I told her that I can't possibly entertain the idea of sending anything to Fish Lad until I receive the photograph I asked for. I know that it seems I'm being a little finicky about that, but just like Fish Lad I will not compromise on my demands. I guess we will have to see who caves in first, but I'll let you into a little secret, it won't be me.

Toodle-pip

Cyril

Little Sis 21:20

Quote:

That is what you normal say all the time pay him for the one he send to you before asking of another one

Miss Elastic 21:23

Quote:

No problem but you are playing with your life from yesterday you will be having problem every day by day untill you pay him the money

Little Sis 21:31

Quote:

See let me tell you I can ask my boyfriend to get the photo for you but the problem is that you are not a good man according to my brother all you want is yours, and you haven't pay my brother for the one he did for you so how can I help you

Why Cyril would want Little Sis's boyfriend to pose for the photograph is beyond me when there's a perfectly good Fish Lad sitting on the sidelines doing nothing. Confused

Elite Baiter Joined: 30 Apr 2017 Posts: 1055

Sadly Cyril's replies have had the expected effect.

Cyril 05:32

Quote:

Little Sis my dear

A very good morning to you, I've been thinking about what you have kindly offered to do to get this whole mess sorted out, but I'm sorry that I must decline having your boyfriend drawn into this. The dispute I have is with your brother and nobody else so I'm afraid that only his photograph will do. I know you are trying your best to help, but what you have suggested would be like myself asking somebody else to pay your brother all of the money he thinks he's owed. Why should either of us get off scot-free when your brother and I have both had our parts to play in this sorry saga. No my dear, I think your brother needs to step forward and admit his mistakes, and his mistakes have been many. Although I think his biggest mistake was contacting me in February pretending to be FBI director Christopher A Warry. Do you know how much of my time he wasted wanting to send a bloody ATM card to me? I tried to explain to him that I wasn't Trevor Davis and it wasn't my card, but he convinced me it was. If only I had realised from the start he was just a bloody scammer I don't think we would be in the situation we are now. You can't imagine how pleased I was when your brother finally came clean and admitted what he'd been trying to do, but he was only doing it so that he could open the electrical shop he had always dreamt of owning. Has he told you all of this or has he just told you I'm a bad man? I'm not a bad man my dear and it hurts that you think I am. I say that because even after everything your brother had put me through I was still willing to help him recognise his full potential. I wish I'd never bothered now because it has just been one problem after another trying to deal with him. I'm sorry to say this, but your brother is a stubborn fool and I'm not sure you will ever be able to make him see sense. You can keep trying if you want to, but until I get the photograph I have asked him for I see no way forward.

Toodle-pip

Cyril

Cyril 06:15

Quote:

Elastic my dear

Thanks for your concern, but hopefully it won't come to that. Little Sis seems to be trying her hardest to find a solution to the problem, she's even offered to get her boyfriend to dress as Santa as some kind of compromise. Of course I had to turn the offer down because this problem is between Fish Lad and myself. Really all we can do now is hope that Little Sis can work some kind of magic and get Fish Lad to see sense. Personally I don't hold out much hope of that happening, but you never know. I will of course keep you informed of any developments as always.

Toodl-pip

Cyril

Little Sis 06:22

Quote:

Okay no problem then go and sort out with him am out of this matter bye

Miss Elastic 06:26

Quote:

You are very wicked and stupid how can you eat this amount of money only you, look let me tell you, you will not have peace in your life until you pay Fish Lad his money

Baiting Guru Joined: 25 Jul 2017 Posts: 2107

If the lad wants to open an electrical shop, perhaps there are some church people who might wish to sponsor him ? He came clean, admitted to scamming and now needs a fresh start. What better way exists to show him true forgiveness and a sense of community than by bankrolling his new enterprise?

Elite Baiter Joined: 30 Apr 2017 Posts: 1055

The rest of yesterday.

Cyril 09:03

Quote:

Little Sis my dear

Believe me when I say I had no intention of offending you when I told you a little something about your brothers past dealings with me. I just thought you needed to know that I am not the bad person that he makes me out to be. I know it's never nice to find out something distasteful about somebody you have probably looked up to throughout your entire life, but I did not want to be dishonest with you. As I've already said, I was over the moon when I had thought I was helping Fish Lad turn his life around, but I also felt he never really appreciated all that I was doing for him. Has he always been so argumentative and stubborn? because I have to tell you there not very endearing qualities. That said, I'm sorry you no longer want to help sort this problem out I guess I shall just have to resort to waiting for your brother to come to his senses and send the photograph of his volition.

Toodle-pip

Cyril

Cyril 09:06

Quote:

Elastic my dear

Wow, you really know how to hurt my feelings. What have I done to you to deserve such insults?

Toodle-pip

Cyril

Miss Elastic 09:59

Quote:

Ask your self the question

Little Sis 10:04

Quote:

He will not send anything to you because if he send it to you now you will take him as a fool and you will not send his money to him look let me tell you no one eat any of my family members money and go free is like you are playing with your life

Cyril 16:20

Quote:

Little Sis my dear

I don't understand why your brother would think that. I'm a man of my word, always have been and always will be, so if I say I will send the money on receipt of the Santa photograph I will do just that. Do you think I really want this bad blood between Fish Lad and myself? Do you think I like putting my staff and Linda in harms way? The answer of course is no, but sometimes we have to do things we don't want to. Sometimes those things are forced upon us by circumstances outside of our control, and I think this is one of those times. I think your brother needs to realise that unless he send the photograph he won't receive a single penny from me no matter what threats are thrown my way. I had hoped that you would have had a little more intelligence than your brother, but I can see that you and he share the same inability to think things through. As I have already said, the solution to the problem is in your brothers hands, if he's to stupid to grasp it then I really do not see what there is left to discuss.

Toodle-pip

Cyril

Cyril 16:34

Quote:

Elastic my dear

I've asked myself, Linda and my staff and none of us can come up with an answer. I know your angry, but perhaps that anger would be better directed towards the person who is responsible for the troubles you and I face in getting your new laptop, phone and shoes to you. I talk of course of Fish Lad who has it in his power to end all of this tomorrow should he wish to do so. So I think instead of saying nasty things to me you should be using your energy trying to convince Fish Lad to get the Santa photograph to me as soon as possible.

Toodle-pip

Cyril

Little Sis 16:42

Quote:

That is not my business

Little Sis 16:43

Quote:

Because you will not pay me after everything

Miss Elastic 16:54

Quote:

I don't know what to say again because if he send the picture to you now as you said you will not send the money to him that is the problem

Miss Elastic 17:19

Quote:

And Fish Lad is not going to spend any money because of you again unless you will send me small money then I will buy the dress for him then tell him to put it on and send the picture to you that is the thing I can do now

Elite Baiter Joined: 30 Apr 2017 Posts: 1055

Radio silence was mantained by both parties over the weekend and Monday which actually suited Cyril just fine. However, all good things eventually come to an end I guess and at the moment this bait seems to be going in that direction.

Little Sis 14:16 yesterday.

Quote:

Hello

Cyril 18:31

Quote:

Little Sis my dear

Do you want something?

Toodle-pip

Cyril

Miss Elastic 18:34

Quote:

I didn't heard from him since 4 days now

Little Sis 18:35

Quote:

Something like what

Today

Cyril 04:22

Quote:

Little Sis my dear

I don't know. I thought you no longer wanted to help sort out this problem between your brother and I. Anyway, that problem seems to have solved itself because I had some terrible news from the orphanage yesterday evening that two of my competitors have already pipped me to the post and sent cards to the orphans depicting a black Santa. I really had wanted to be first, but your brothers dithering on the matter has cost me that prize. I don't expect you to understand what a cut-throat world the bait business is, where every slight advantage one can achieve goes a long way to improving your standing in the eyes of your peers. All I have to say is I just hope your brother is happy about this new upset he's caused me. I guess all that Linda and I can do now is put our heads together and try to think of something different for the cards we want to send.

Toodle-pip

Cyril

Cyril 04:31

Quote:

Elastic my dear

I'm sorry my dear, but your last couple of emails hurt me deeply and I thought it best that we end our relationship before either of us said something we may regret. However, since you've taken the trouble to get back in contact I'll assume that everything is good between us again and we can still be friends. Is that the case my dear or am I interpreting your message incorrectly?

Toodle-pip

Cyril

Posted: Wed Nov 06, 2019 7:50 am

MrDapper, it might be a small consolation, but it was actually Cyril that got my lad convinced to make the picture, so you'll win anyway..... or not, because Cyril had to die

Elite Baiter Joined: 30 Apr 2017 Posts: 1055

^If Cyril was of some small service to you then I'm a happy man and I'll be sure to raise a glass or two in his memory Laughing

Little Sis (full of hope) 06:03

Quote:

So you don't want the picture anymore

Cyril 08:02

Quote:

Little Sis my dear

I wouldn't say that, if you can still get your brother to send me it I may be able to use it next year. However, for this year I don't think it will it's going to be enough to outshine what I have been told has already been sent. That's why Linda and I have now decided to ask for a new photograph of your brother dressed as Santa, but we also want him pictured with a couple of his friends dressed as Santa's elves. We really think a group shot like that would add something special to the orphans Christmas day. Obviously I want this kept between you, Fish Lad, Linda and myself because I don't want one of my competitors getting wind of the idea and pipping me to the post again. Try to talk to your brother and make him see sense that this really is such a small thing to ask for such a large reward.

Toodle-pip

Cyril

Miss Elastic 06:01

Quote:

So what is going on, your office I hope all is well with you

Cyril 08:33

Quote:

Elastic my dear

We're all holding up rather well all things considered. Our moral was boosted over the weekend by the arrival of Jakub's wife Zofia and his little son Kacper. He's a right little rascal and everyone here has taken an immediate shine to him. He's only three, but he's already able to walk a few steps which Kacper has told me proudly is extremely early for a Polish child. As for the current situation regarding Fish Lad, there really isn't too much I can tell you except that Little Sis is back in touch after a short silence and we're now trying to work something out. Speaking of that, I can see there are a couple of new emails just appeared in my inbox hopefully that's Little Sis with some promising news.

Toodle-pip

Cyril

Posted: Wed Nov 06, 2019 8:57 am

Mr Dapper wrote:

He's only three, but he's already able to walk a few steps which Kacper has told me proudly is extremely early for a Polish child.

There went my tea.... Laughing

Elite Baiter Joined: 30 Apr 2017 Posts: 1055

Linoline wrote:

Cyril had to die

But why colon cancer? I've always imagined Cyril dying heroically trying to save a litter of puppies from a burning building. Laughing

Yesterday

Little Sis 08:13

Quote:

So how do you think that my brother will do that because he have to buy the dress for him and for his friends so I think all you need to do is to send moneyto my brother and he will send any photo that you want besides he send you so many photos without ask for money isn't it

Little Sis 08:16

Quote:

So try and sort this out by your self because he will pay those guy that will work with him because there will think that my brother going to make a very big amount of money with the photo why he haven't get paid for the first time so think about it

Then a strange request from Miss Elastic. Confused

Miss Elastic 13:21

Quote:

For your information don't reply any email that is not come from me, Fish Lad, and Little Sis for your own good

Cyril 18:03

Quote:

Elastic my dear

What do you mean, is there some kind of problem I should be aware of? I need to answer Little Sis's emails she sent me this morning, but I think it best that I hold off until you explain what's going on.

Toodle-pip

Cyril

Miss Elastic 18:52

Quote:

Is nothing much just that I don't want you to reply any email that is not from me, Fish Lad, and Little Sis to avoid problem

We certainly wouldn't want that, not when everything has run so smoothly so far. Laughing

Miss Elastic 18:54

Quote:

And please try and email Fish Lad tomorrow and sort things out because i don't understand him anymore

Master of Master Baiters Joined: 05 Jan 2017 Posts: 790

The Christmas rush is on, I suspect your lad is afraid you will be whisked away by another. .awwww in a way he is protecting you ...

Elite Baiter Joined: 30 Apr 2017 Posts: 1055

^Fish Lad needn't worry, I'll stick around for as long as he needs me. Laughing

Cyril 05:44

Quote:

Elastic My dear

A very good morning to you. I've just read the last couple of emails you sent me and I'm still a little confused about the problems you seem to think we may face if I do not follow your warning about replying to anybody apart from you, Fish Lad, or Little Sis. Who would possibly want to contact me about the problem we're facing? And more importantly who else apart from Linda, my staff, Jed and his co workers, Fish Lad's brother and his bitch, Fish Lad's friends who helped with The Black Face of Africa campaign, half the British Army, their families and friends, people high up in the British Government who must have sanctioned the use of said troops against me, their families and friends and old uncle Tom Cobley would know about this? that's what I'm asking myself. If you know something that I don't, you need to tell me because I don't want anything to go wrong when we're all so close to finding a solution to the problem. I really had hoped to have at least been able to email Little Sis this morning as I never got around to replying to her emails yesterday, but now I think it best I await your full explanation as to why you have made your ominous warning.

Toodle-pip

Cyril

Miss Elastic 06:42

Quote:

Why I said that is because Fish Lad friend stole his phone laptop some money from him last that is why I said you should not reply anybody but he bought new phone yesterday that is why I ask you to contact him

Cyril 08:52

Quote:

Elastic my dear

Firstly, I don't think you can really call somebody who steals from you a friend and secondly I still don't really understand why I can't reply to Birlic or Tatiyana. Don't worry I haven't told them anything about what's been going on with Fish Lad and I won't. After all, I don't want Birlic feeling responsible in any way even though it was him that got us into this mess in the first place. If it hadn't been for his enthusiasm for Fish Lad being the right person for The Black Face of Africa Campaign I would have probably terminated Fish Lad's contract and paid him for the work he and his friends did long before it got to this stage. Anyway, no good crying over spilt milk, we are where we are, so I guess I'll just have to plough on until we come to some kind of satisfactory conclusion. So to that end my dear, I need you to ask Fish Lad to contact me, but just so I know the email is coming from him can you also ask him to start his email with the code words "Hi it's Fish Lad" That way I'll know it's really Fish Lad contacting me and not that so called friend of his. By the way, just out of curiosity, can you also ask Fish Lad which one of his friends it was that stole his belongings? Was it that ugly one that wore that damned Manchester United shirt? The one that originally started all of the problems we've faced over the past months. To be honest I never did like the look of him, but I kept quiet about it out of respect for Fish Lad. Now I wish that I'd spoken up at the time, perhaps then Fish Lad wouldn't have had to go through this latest misfortune of his. Anyway, I'll leave having a word with Fish Lad in your capable hands and wait for you to get back to me to say you have passed my message on.

Toodle-pip

Cyril

Addition

Miss Elastic 09:39

Quote:

Hello I have passed the message to him he will contact you soon

Cyril 09:43

Quote:

Elastic my dear

Thanks for doing that, the sooner we can get this all sorted out the better.

Toodle-pip

Cyril

Fish Lad 09:47

Quote:

Hi it's Fish Lad hello how are you doing

Elite Baiter Joined: 30 Apr 2017 Posts: 1055

Cyril 10:14

Quote:

Fish Lad

Despite our present differences I really was sorry to hear about your recent bit of bad luck, It really is upsetting when somebody you considered a friend lets you down. Perhaps you can now understand how I feel regarding all of this continuing unpleasantness between us. I had hoped that we would have enjoyed a long and happy working relationship, but alas that was not to be. Still, I suppose we should let the past stay in the past and try to work out how we are to move forward. Firstly, can I ask where you are at the moment, because the last thing I seem to recall was that you were on your way to the UK to take over command from your brother and that stupid bitch of his.

Toodle-pip

Cyril

Cyril 11:42

Quote:

Elastic my dear

It's been over an hour since I replied to the email Fish Lad sent me and I've had no reply, do you know what on earth is going on? I'm sorry to bother you with this, but I'm not sure if it's safe to contact Little Sis or not.

Toodle-pip

Cyril

Posted: Thu Nov 07, 2019 12:39 pm

Quote:

But why colon cancer? I've always imagined Cyril dying heroically trying to save a litter of puppies from a burning building

Fixed that for you. I'm sorry that Nina wasn't really clear in her explanations earlier on Laughing

Cyril is a hero

Elite Baiter Joined: 30 Apr 2017 Posts: 1055

^thanks and a medal to boot, so proud. Laughing

If Fish Lad wasn't such a little fibber I might think that there was something festively magical in the air.

Yesterday

Fish Lad 12:45

Quote:

Am not coming to UK anymore and am not going to do anything bad to you again let's think the way forward

Miss Elastic 12:49

Quote:

Maybe he is busy now and i talk to him to make a peace with you so that everything will be okay

Cyril 16:47

Quote:

Fish Lad

Well, I have to say it's splendid to find that good news waiting for me, and there really is nothing to think about. All you need to do is get the photograph of yourself dressed as Santa with your two friends dressed as little elves to me as soon a possible and then this whole business can be concluded.

Toodle-pip

Cyril

Cyril 16:51

Quote:

Elastic my dear

Thanks for talking to Fish Lad it looks like it did the trick. I've just sent him an email reaffirming my offer and I feel confident this time there will be a happier outcome.

Toodle-pip

Cyril

Fish Lad 17:03

Quote:

I would have like to do that now but I don't have any money with me to buy all the dress for me and my friends besides there will ask for money so if you want me to get the photo please send me small money like £1000 so that i will use it then when i get the picture to you we will talk of what to do

Miss Elastic 17:10

Quote:

So when he get the photo to you now you will send him the money right?

Cyril 17:28

Quote:

Fish Lad

It seems that you haven't quite grasped the concept of you scratch my back and I'll scratch yours so let me try to make it simple enough for you to understand. First you send the photograph then I send you what you have earned so far. I don't want to hear about your lack of money, you seem to have enough to have your brother, his bitch and half the British Army at your disposal so finding enough to hire a few fancy dress costumes should not be to much of a problem for you.

Toodle-pip

Cyril

Cyril 17:31

Quote:

Elastic my dear

I have just sent an email to Fish Lad confirming that very thing.

Toodle-pip

Cyril

Fish Lad 17:32

Quote:

Okay I will borrow the money but what I send you the picture and you don't send the money to me what will happen

Today with fingers crossed

Cyril 03:52

Quote:

Fish Lad

I don't understand what you mean, why would I do that? Surely we both want the same thing, an end to all of this unpleasantness and a new found sense of trust between us. I look forward to receiving the photograph and finally putting everything that has gone before behind us.

Toodle-pip

Cyril

Let's turn the heat up.

Cyril 05:19

Quote:

Elastic my dear

Sorry to bother you, but do you think it would be okay to reply to an email Father Lawrence has sent me. It's come from his email address so I don't think it could be Fish Lad's ex friend who's sent it. I only ask because it sounds quite urgent as there's been a fire at Linda's old refugee camp and two of the dormitory blocks have burnt to the ground. Linda wants us to send some financial help because things were bad enough when she was there, but now she thinks they must be truly dreadful. Linda says Father Lawrence was always kind to her and it was after all he that made our union possible with all of the help he gave us so Linda really wants to repay him in some way. What we are thinking is if Fish Lad doesn't send the photograph he has promised we could send all of his money to Father Lawrence instead. We could also send the 20% of the profits that were earmarked for Fish Lad once a month. At least that way Fish Lad's share would be going to a good cause rather than just sitting in my bank account. Don't worry, you'll still get you phone, laptop and shoes I'll get them to you somehow. Anyway, do you think it would be safe to contact Father Lawrence? I won't mention Fish Lad's money until Fish Lad has at least had a chance to do what he's promised to do, but I would still like to let Father Lawrence know that Linda and I are here for him.

Toodle-pip

Cyril

Elite Baiter Joined: 30 Apr 2017 Posts: 1055

Not much progress, but I'm hoping all's not lost.

Yesterday

Fish Lad 10:38

Quote:

Is okay I will get it to you

Miss Elastic 10:42

Quote:

Yes reply the email but don't send Fish Lad money out to anyone because according to him he will send you the photo soon so keep the money to him

Cyril 16:12

Quote:

Fish Lad

I saw your email earlier today and I've been sitting here waiting for the photograph. If you don't mind me asking when can I expect you to send it? "Is okay I will get it to you" is not really very helpful when I have a tight schedule to stick to. If you're just mucking me about again then you'd better tell me because I have other plans for your share of The Black Face of Africa profits if you are not serious about sending the photograph for the orphans.

Toodle-pip

Cyril

Cyril 17:00

Quote:

Elastic my dear

I've not long ago sent Fish Lad an email asking where the damned photograph is and as I write this I have still not received a thing from the bloody fool. I don't understand why, when there is so much at stake Fish Lad seems to act in such a blase way. Linda says she's sick and tired of waiting for Fish Lad to act like a man and do what he's promised to do so she wants to send his money to Father Lawrence tomorrow morning at the latest. I really don't know what to do for the best, but I'm also getting a bit sick of Fish Lad's constant failure to do what he has said he will do. Do you think it would help if I sent Little Sis an email asking her to give her brother a swift kick up the arse to get him moving?

Toodle-pip

Cyril

Fish Lad 18:16

Quote:

Are you stupid I told you that am not with money I will get the picture to you on Monday

Miss Elastic 18:25

Quote:

Don't worry about it i will talk to him he will send the money on Monday morning I will try my best okay but don't touch Fish Lad's money if Linda want to send money let him wait untill you sort your self out with Fish Lad because if Fish Lad send the picture to you and you didn't pay him his money he will not be happy with you okay

Today

Cyril 04:13

Quote:

Fish Lad

Monday it is then. Have a nice weekend.

Toodle-pip

Cyril

Cyril 04:36

Quote:

Elastic my dear

Don't worry, I've managed to calm Linda down, but it didn't really help matters when Fish Lad called me stupid in his last email. Linda was all for going to the bank this morning and sending every single penny of Fish Lad's money to Father Lawrence there and then. Luckily for Fish Lad the bank was closed by then so it's given me the chance to calm her down. Anyway we also had the added problem that Fish Lad may not have been honest with us when he intimated he had called of his offensive against us. Akimbo is adamant that whilst on watch he saw a black man and white woman peering through the perimeter fence on the north side of the warehouse and we suspect that it may have been Fish Lad's brother and that bitch of his. I probably shouldn't be telling you this, but the north side of the building is not covered that well by CCTV so if an attack was to come that's were we expect it, hence Akimbo keeping an eye out. Elastic my dear, do you think that Fish Lad suddenly agreeing to send the photograph is really a smoke screen to lull us all here into a false sense of security? I mean, I wouldn't put it past the devious little weasel to try something like that. If you could keep a close eye on him for me there will be another pair of Jimmy choos in it for you once everything is sorted out.

Toodl-pip

Cyril

Elite Baiter Joined: 30 Apr 2017 Posts: 1055

Radio silence was maintained by all parties for the rest of yesterday apart form one short incoming message from Fish Lad.

16:43

Quote:

Okay

Fishy business still going strong.	View next topic View previous topic