"Nickname: Mal, Captain, Captain Tight Pants"

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Posted: Tue Jul 23, 2019 8:33 am

In 2013 I was baiting a Lad named "John Doe" who, when asked how he had heard of me (Captain Mal) posted a link to a comic book site: https://forum.419eater.com/forum/viewtopic.php?p=1964293&highlight=serenity#1964293

Now another Lad has decided to go one better.

Claiming to be from "Department of Homeland Security Accra Ghana," he wrote:

Quote:

... I am writing to confirm the fact if you are (Dead) Or
(Alive)? Because
you have a consignment box in our office here in Accra, and Mr. Jude
Betsy came to our office stated that you are dead and failure to reply
back in the next 24hrs simply means what Mr. Jude Betsy said was right
that you are dead. And Mr. Jude Betsy has agreed to pay the needed
valued of $925 dollars required for the delivering charge fee of your
consignment box to your country. But we have not gotten the fee from
him yet as we want to find out if you are dead or not, so if you are
still (alive) you are advice in your own best interest to reply back
within 24hrs.
Your are advice to send the delivering charges fee through western
union or money gram. Send through the name of my assistance security
officer as below :
Name :
Country : Ghana
City : Accra
Amount : $925 dollars
I want you to send us your residence address and telephone so that the
diplomat will call you as soon as he arrive to your city and hand over
your consignment to you. I
am waiting to receive the delivering charges fee from you and
immediately I will proceed for your delivering.

I asked about the consignment, and was told:

Quote:

Mr. Jude Besty is a friend to Mr. Chukwu J Ibeh from United Bank Of Africa who submitted your package to my office here in Accra Ghana...

... and to send money.

Some exchanges later, after I'd told the Lad that

Quote:

You've got a fucking hard-on for that delivery fee, that's for gorram sure!
But I'd like to point out that I don't know this Chukwu Ibe guy, or anything about a consignment box. Is that clear to you?

Along came something truly unexpected:

Quote:

Since you did not know Mr. Chukwu J Ibe. Are you ready to receive your package from us? Below is your information we receive about you when your package was submitted in my office.
Name : Nathan Fillion as Malcolm Reynolds
First appearace Serenity
Created by : Joss Whedon
Portrayed by :Nathan Fillion
Information
Nickname : Mal, Captain, Captain Tight Pants (Kaylee)
Gender : Male
Occupation : Captain of Serenity
Spouse : Saffron"
Relatives : Unnamed mother
Homeworld : Shadow
I still advice you to ahead to send the delivering fee charges and immediately i will proceed to delivering your package to you.

I'm wondering whether to outright deny being married to Saffron, or simply disavow all knowledge of Joss Wheedon.

Edited to tidy up the thread title

Elite Baiter Joined: 30 Apr 2017 Posts: 1055

I think the lad just Googled the name Malcolm Reynolds and went with this the lazy little devil.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Malcolm_Reynolds

Posted: Tue Jul 23, 2019 12:59 pm

Mr Dapper wrote:

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Malcolm_Reynolds

The article states:

Quote:

Conceived by Joss Whedon, the character Malcolm Reynolds was the only definite character he had in mind when formulating the ensemble cast

I'm pretty sure there should be lots of questions about how the lad knew Joss Whedon, alone, conceived Mal. Laughing

Posted: Tue Jul 23, 2019 2:02 pm

Mal's denied ever being married to Saffron. Let's see what (if anything) comes from that.

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