"Hello beautiful" - Cammy's new Lad

By joining our community you will have the ability to post topics and access other forums reserved for members. Registration is quick, simple and absolutely free. Join our community today by clicking here.

Posted: Thu Jun 20, 2019 7:18 am

Thursday

08.15 - Lagos local time - The lad just received this message (from the PithLog servers):

Quote:

Dear Sir, Madam,

You have a parcel on its way to you. The parcel has GPS-tracking enabled, so you can check its location whenever you want.

To track the parcel, simply head over to www.P-log and log in with the following details:

Username: the email address of the lad
Password: one standard password

For security reasons you are required to change the password the first time you log in.

The sender of the parcel will provide you with the necessary tracking information.

Kind regards,

PITH Log...

A "personalized" message from Customer Care Department will follow in short time.
===

08.57 - Directly from the Customer Care Department, to our idiot:

Quote:

=== PACKAGE NOTIFICATION! ===

TRACKING CODE: TRK927911***
PIN: 40***

Dear KEVIN ***,

A parcel has been allocated for delivery by the following customer: CAMILLE ***.
Please visit our web site at http://www.P-log.com and use the following code to track your parcel: TRK927911***
If you are already a Pith-Log customer, you may go directly to our login page to track your package.
The email on record for tracking code TRK927911*** is: ***

Should you experience any difficulties, please contact Customer Care Department at *** and reference the tracking number of your parcel in the "Subject" line (on the title) of the message.

Thank you for using Pith-Log, the finest in 5-Star Customer Service!
Claude Postumierre
Manager at Customer Care Department

This is an automatically generated message. In case of emergency, you can always use my personal email address: ***

===

Tomorrow I will "move" the parcel to the Singapore Airport. Laughing

===

10.17 - Still nothing from our dear Kevin. Cammy can ask, innocent: "Have you been contacted by the Pith-Log company?" Twisted Evil

===

Posted: Thu Jun 20, 2019 10:44 am

Let's hope that Birlic's hard work isn't spoiled by Kevin's idiocy - tonight's chat doesn't body well.

Hello cammy
O HAI
Or not. Did I say something wrong?
Not really
Why do you ask ?
The time it took you to reply.
The network is bad
That's why
OIC.
Did you get my email?
On Gmail?
It's the only one I've got for you.
Ok
So did you?
I just saw it
Kewl.
Will it be delivered to my doorstep
Ask the company. It's out of my hands!
How am i suppose to do that.... This is the first package I'm receiving
How about you open the email and read the fucking attachment??????
ARGH!!!!!!1
Ok cammy
Am i paying a fenders fee
A what?
What the Hel is that?
To claim the package
Did you truly really actually open the attachment?
And be honest!
You didn't open it... am I right?
I haven't
OMG. Just do it.
For my sanity's sake.
Because of the network
Oh fuck...
For every solution there's a fucking problem.
I will
When?
Soon
Before I actually do tear out some hair?
I will cammy
Just do it and then everything is going to be fine.
I'll get back to you sometime on Saturday. You should have good news for me.
Love and peace.

Cammy will be going dark for the next two days. Let's hope that Kevin does the needful.

Edited to add italics.

Posted: Thu Jun 20, 2019 10:55 am

Quote:

For every solution there's a fucking problem.

that made me LOL, just because it's so true in this case. Nice one

Posted: Thu Jun 20, 2019 10:56 am

^^^ Hopefully our idiot will be communicative!

11.50 - Nigeria local time

From the Pith-Log servers, a new promising message:

Quote:

=== PACKAGE NOTIFICATION! ===

TRACKING CODE: TRK927911***
PIN: 40***

Dear KEVIN ***,

UPDATE: Your package has passed first processing procedure.
Please visit our web site at http://www.P-log.com and use the following code to track your parcel: TRK927911***

We will send you the necessary details to take over the package.
Please reconfirm all the shipping details (name, surname, phone number and the exact address of the Receiver).

Thank you for using Pith-Log, the finest in 5-Star Customer Service!
Claude Postumierre
Manager at Customer Care Department

===

12.40 - He send me one very short message... that means it has received my messages. Right? Laughing

Quote:

TRK927911***

===

13.15 - Claude to our dear Kevin:

Quote:

=== PACKAGE NOTIFICATION! ===

Dear KEVIN,

Did you get my previous message regarding the accuracy of the data?
I need you to confirm that you are the authorized person (The Receiver) to pick up the parcel with the number
Please tell me:
- full name
- delivery address
- telephone / fax number

Thank you for using Pith-Log, the finest in 5-Star Customer Service!
Claude

At this stage of the story, it is important that the idiot know our new characters and have confidence in them. Laughing

===

Posted: Thu Jun 20, 2019 1:43 pm

Kevin asked Cammy just after she logged out:

Quote:

Is the money with the package

He won't know for sure for a couple of days...

Posted: Fri Jun 21, 2019 5:45 am

Friday

Kevin to PithLog:

Quote:

I'm having trouble logging in

and

Quote:

Yes, I confirm.

Full name :Kevin smith

Address: No 2, okeowo close, off akinwowo street, Alaguntan road iyana ipaja ,Lagos

Phone number: 08114290*** or 09035466***

I "moved" the parcel's position in Singapore ... he can check this. We also want to see his ID. Laughing

So, directly from the PithLog servers, my customer care manager Claude writes:

Quote:

=== PACKAGE NOTIFICATION! ===

Dear KEVIN,
Your parcel is on the way for delivery.
Today it has reached the commercial hub of Changi airport / Singapore.
For delivery, it will be necessary but sufficient to identify yourself correctly with a valid ID document: National ID Card or Driver License or Passport.

Thank you for using Pith-Log, the finest in 5-Star Customer Service!
Claude

===

08.30 - Our dear lad send some ID paper... of course, he has another real name. Will be funny. Laughing

Claude (from his personal address), one innocent message:

Quote:

=== PACKAGE NOTIFICATION! ===

Dear KEVIN,
It seems that our main servers (those that automatically track all the parcels) are extremely busy these days, and there seems to be some technical dysfunctions in receiving and sending messages.
For these reasons, we will continue to maintain contact through my personal email address.
I hereby inform you that the parcel #TRK927911*** arrived today in Singapore Airport's commercial hub on its way to Africa.
For delivery, you will need to be able to authenticate yourself correctly with a valid ID: National ID Card or Driver License or Passport.
Please send me a scanned copy of any of these documents. For any kind of explanation, I'm at your disposal.

Thank you for using Pith-Log, the finest in 5-Star Customer Service!
Claude

===

09.30 - Our idiot sent, again, the same paper shit. To the "main server".
- Claude writes back:

Quote:

Dear Kelvin,
The IT Department is working to resolve the issues previously reported.
Please use this email address to communicate with me.

Thank you for using Pith-Log, the finest in 5-Star Customer Service!
Claude

===

09.50 - Let's the show begin. Our dear lad send to Claude that ID paper. Laughing

Quote:

Thank you, I will do that.

Claude, friendly:

Quote:

Dear Kevin, thank you for your message.
I received from you a strange document, which is nothing but a simple useless receipt for the identity of a person called Yusuf Joseph.
Who is that person? Is he a relative of yours? I have noticed that the home address matches what we have in our records (for your delivery).
Let me repeat my previous request to send a scanned copy of one of these 3 documents (the only ones that are accepted for delivery identification):
- National ID Card
- Driver License
- Passport

Cheers,
Claude

===

Few hours later, he reply to Claude:

Quote:

Actually that's me in the attachment I sent to you. My full name is Yosuph Joseph Kevin. Smith is the name I'm known for.

If the National ID card weren't mine, it won't contain the same address Camille M*** W*** gave to your courier company and also if it weren't mine, I wouldn't have sent it to you.

Kevin.

We will have some problem with this, but not now... later. Laughing

===

15.05 - Claude to Kevin:

Quote:

Dear Kevin,
Okay, it's okay, I understand your address issue now. It's perfect!
But we really need a scanned color photocopy (or a simple phone photography) after a valid ID: National ID Card or Driver License or Passaport.
Student passes or other unofficial papers are not admitted. That NIN Receipt (the document you sent to me) is NOT an official act!
When you get the official document? I mean your own National ID Card.
I would not want to have problems or delays in delivery because you are unable to identify yourself correctly and legally.
At the time of delivery, you will need to be able to identify yourself with that ID document in the original form and sign a Receipt of the package.
And nothing else, the rest of the fees already paid by The Sender.

Let me explain again. We need a copy of the ID (your personal ID) with which you will identify yourself in front of the delivery agent.
Only Passport, Driver License or a National ID Card are and will be accepted for delivery validation / identification.
I hope you understand me now.

Cheers,
Claude

===

17.05 - The lad, to Claude:

Quote:

Like I said in my previous mail, the attachment I sent to you is my valid ID card and the NIN is what is recognized here in Nigeria.

It's what you will use to recognize any citizen(s) here in Nigeria; except you need a clear photo of me, then I can send one to you immediately. But this is my national ID card so I don't think there should be any difficulty or whatsoever to getting that aspect sorted out.

All I need you to understand that the attachment I sent is my own national ID card. You can have that looked up on google so that you'll know that it is affirmative sir.

Claude:

Quote:

Dear Kevin,

No, this is a simple receipt that only confirms that you applied for a ID Card.
In fact, write black on white there: "You will be notified when your National Identity Card is ready."
So, we will need a copy of THAT National Identity Card... not from this simple slip (receipt). I'm sure there will be no problems, is not it?
If you are not able to get your National ID Card in a timely manner, then I will try to check the situation and see if there are similar cases.
Surely we'll solve this problem!

Cheers,
Claude

The lad:

Quote:

Okay now I comprehend what you're trying to say and you're affirmative.
The main national ID card hasn't been issued, and I don't have a driver's license or an international passport.

So I only have a student's ID card and a worker's ID card. Is that okay??

Nope my dear lad, it is not OK! Not at all!
I will try to make him accept to identify with the method of "The Vitruvian Man" (you know what I'm trying to say Laughing

).

===

20.15 - Our boy checks the parcel's position repeatedly. Tomorrow morning I'll move his parcel to Dubai Airport. Laughing

===

Posted: Sat Jun 22, 2019 2:38 am

Go Birlic, I'm loving this!

Kevin seems to have taken to heart Cammy's aside about being out of touch until Saturday - nothing in Hangout since his question about the money.

Quote:

So I only have a student's ID card and a worker's ID card.

Kevin said nothing about having a job, but then if he had, he wouldn't be able to say he doesn't have any money. He's still a lying asshole no matter what.

Posted: Sat Jun 22, 2019 5:58 am

Saturday

06.50 - The parcel has reached Dubai airport.
- Claude writes to Kevin:

Quote:

Dear Kevin,

Good morning and sorry for my late response. Our web-servers are overcrowded and do not cope with the input and output data stream. I do not know if you've already been informed. From the satellite channel records that monitor international routes of our parcels, I can confirm that the parcel #TRK927911*** has arrived in Cargo Area - Shipping Hub - Dubai International (DBX) Airport - Dubai.

Theoretically, you should be in possession of the parcel within 7-8 days. You will be contacted by our local branch manager and together you will agree on the date and time of delivery. No additional costs! You must be able to identify yourself correctly and sign the document certifying that the parcel has been delivered sealed and intact.

Send me the scanned copies of your Student ID and Worker ID and I'll try to convince the legal team members to accept them. The fact that you do not have an official identity document (those documents are legally useless) is an major impediment. I will try to get a special derogation for you but you may need to provide another type of identification (biometric, visual, etc.). I will come back to you later, with many details.

Cheers,
Claude

===

07.21 - The lad is tracking his parcel. Laughing

Quote:

Hi!

Someone logged into PITH-log to track a parcel.

Trackingnumber : TRK927911***
Time : 08:07 CET
Lad IP : 197.210.53.135

This message was brought to you by:

PITH-Log

===

08.30 - Our boy writes to Claude (2 new trophies in attachment):

Quote:

Ok, thank you.

By name, both pictures are made in 2016, so I do not think he has "the originals" anymore.
He's probably going to try to find an excuse not to send any better copies. We will see. Laughing

Claude:

Quote:

Dear Kevin,
Thanks for the message, I hope everything is all right.
Please resend the two documents again (better copies).
These photos sent now is blurred and I think they will not be accepted for validation.

Cheers,
Claude

===

10.05 - The lad just sent me two more pictures, as bad as the first.

Quote:

Sure, here it is.

Claude:

Quote:

Dear Kelvin,
Thanks, I received the two pictures. I will send them to the Legal Department for study and analysis. In any case, I have checked the "limit situations" and we do not have to worry because there is an identification procedure that is used for people who do not have a stable home and / or identity papers. For those people, identification is made "biometric" (using a software algorithm that analyzes several photos of the subject and creates a biometric profile). I'll come back with many details, probably Monday.

Cheers,
Claude

===

11.36 - The lad:

Quote:

Ok, thanks for the update.

===

Tomorrow, I will move the parcel to Cairo (Egypt)... then, to Casablanca (Morocco).
From there, we will see... I have more options, but I will wait for Yastreb's opinion.

Baiting Guru Joined: 25 Jul 2017 Posts: 2107

Love the Vitruvian Man photos! What else can you squeeze from him?

Posted: Sat Jun 22, 2019 12:33 pm

A brief delay in Casablanca would be in order, methinks - say 2-3 days; more if Kevin doesn't comply with the ID requirements. Is the overall plan still to make travel to another country a requirement?

Meanwhile, chat tonight turned into farce...

O HAI!
Do you have good news for me?
Lol....
Can't you just tell me?

He attached the notification from PLog.

That was sent to me.....they said I'll receive it in 7-8 day
That's OK, isn't it?
Yes it is
Is the money with the package
Oh that... yes it is.
It'll be fine.
Ohh...in printer ?
Don't you worry about it.
And yes.
Ok
I'm just scared
Of what?
Is my toyboy-to-be losing his nerve?
Lol....I'm just scared because i don't want anything to happen to the money and then loose your trust
What in Freyja's name is a "special derogation"?
Huh??
It's in that PNG file you loaded! Didn't you read it?
Ohh yeah.....I don't understand that either
Fuck...
Have you thought of maybe, I don't know, asking them?
Don't bother yourself about that
Maybe I should if you won't!
Whoa, just wait a minute!
What's wrong
How did I miss that?
"Worker ID"?
You've got a job?
No....it's fake
What?
What the actual fuck?
You sent them a fake ID card?
Say it isn't so!
They asked for either a driver's license, international passport or a national ID card i only have a national ID card but they said it wasn't accepted so i made a worker's ID card in a cafe
But it's not illegal here
It's legal to have and to use a fake ID?
It's not exactly fake if i was working i would be asked to have an ID card recognition but since i wasn't working i just had to do it or else i won't be able to collect the package
"Not exactly fake"? Is that like "alternate facts"?
Cammy trust me it's safe
What kind of worker are you then? According to your card?
An hair stylist
A hair stylist? LOLOLOLOLOLOL!!!!!!!!1
Lol
You know that hair stylist is about the gayest job there is?
Not that I mind, but still, it's sooooo funny!
Lol....not in Nigeria

Then he dropped in both "IDs" and the ID card application.

"Yussuph Joseff Kevin"???
That's the name I'm using on all my ID's
But that not the person I sent the package to!!!!!!!!!!!!!!11
This is turning into a fucking train wreck!
Don't worry yourself about that i explained to them already
It's fine
I had a headache.
Now I have a much worse headache.
I thought this was all so simple.
It is cammy trust me
It's like this web of lies thing from a thriller novel.
"Cammy White did not realise it, but she would soon be caught in her would-be lover's web of lies, and that was the beginning of a nightmare that would drag her to the brink!"
(Can I write or what!)
Lol.....cammy trust me on this
I'm not sure I can.
You're not the man I was chatting with at the start.
I'm not a lair believe me....you need to see me first
But you are a liar. I mean. fake IDs, dewd.
In Nigeria when working they don't give you an ID card so it's left for the worker to make one.... That's what i did, the difference is i don't work
Words fail me, dewd. Seriously.
Cammy please.... If i was not to be trusted i wouldn't tell you to come to Nigeria
I LOVE you so much to lie to you
Just to other people.
The ones I entrusted with the package.
If i didn't give them an ID they won't deliver the package, would you like that?
If I had known then what I know now...
I don't get
... I wouldn't have sent the package.
Oh gods.
Cammy please
What?
I'm sorry, please forgive me.....don't be angry with me i beg you
I just got an update from them

He attached the latest PLog notification.

And?
And i actually need a list of the things you sent
I didn't tell you?
Not exactly
Then what exactly did I tell you? Exactly.
You said you bought me a phone, shoes, a laptop, i think a console.......
But i don't know how many shoes or if there's something else you bought
I didn't get the shoes.
Oh ok
I figured we could buy them when I got there.
Ok
Can you tell me again the things you bought
2 iPhones (Samsung Galaxy S10)
2 Laptops (MS Surface Book 2)
1 Playstation
1 Printer
1 BVLGARI gold chain
1 BVLGARI Solotempo watch
1 pair diamond earstuds
1 gold bracelet
Total value of the listed items is a tad under 20K.
Ok.....you bought 2 iPhones and a Samsung galaxy s10
Samsung Galaxy is an iPhone, right?
No it's not...... Apple is an iPhone
You wanted a Samsung Galaxy S10! That's what you told me!
You know what?
I need coffee.
Ok cammy
How much did you send
Coffee and Neurofen... I feel so much better.
Lol
How much did you send
Why don't you ask me that again?
How?
Oh, no reason.
Except just me being me.
Oh, you're no fun now.
The full 50K.
Lol... OK baby
You know I'm on my own here because my BFBEs think I've been too tetchy to go out with? That's just wrong for me.
What if i was with you so you won't be alone
You're not. Fact of life, dewd.
When you come i could go back with you
You'd need a passport, for a start.
Yes cammy
And get past the DICMA Gestapo.
Huh...what's that
What would your family say?
Nothing
My mom totally agrees
DICMA is the Department of Immigration, Citizenship and Multicultural Affairs.
And from what I've heard, they make the KGB look trusting.
Ok
Lol...cammy easy with the abbreviations
What's KGB
The old Soviet Secret Police.
Ok
How's your visa going
That's another issue. I thought I had it like totally covered.
There's a requirement for an invitation letter apparently. How the fuck would a first-time tourist get one of those?
I'm suppose to send that but i don't know how to get it
You... write it?
Maybe?
I'm not sure I'll have to find out
If you don't do it, I ain't coming, which means I got those jabs and went through all that grief for nothing!
I'll try and get it
Do or not do, there is no try!
Or whatever that line was.
Ok cammy
Can i have another picture of you
Full
Full?
I mean a full picture of you
Are you asking for a nude pic????
No
Just as well!
The one you sent for me was just face
That's why I'm asking for a full picture
I'll find something that's not in my portfolio.
Ok
Tell you what - get me the letter and you get the pic. Deal?
Come on cammy
Ok deal
Kewl.
I'll be going now. Ciao!

So, will he actually produce an invitation letter?

Posted: Sat Jun 22, 2019 1:00 pm

^^^ LOL!

Yastreb, Cammy wants to visit Nigeria?
Why she not go (along with a girlfriend as sexy as she) somewhere in a luxury resort, into a national park? Benin or Cameroon?... of course, Cammy will rent a bungalow and pay for Kevin. He just needs to get there, along with another friend of him.

See your PM.

Posted: Sat Jun 22, 2019 1:26 pm

My name is “idiot”, and I have asked Cammy to come to my country to prove to her that although I have used a fake name and forged a work pass, I am genuine, and can guarantee I am not a scammer. I am perfectly capable of supporting her during her visit, despite not having a job, having the full support of my mother in this

I just hope the money hidden in the parcel and whatever she brings with her is enough for a hotel, because where I live is pretty grim

Visa please.

Posted: Sat Jun 22, 2019 2:05 pm

Generally, the procedure is that for some reason involving licensing, the company can’t deliver to Nigeria. As Casablanca is the main African hub, that’s where the package is kept for lack of anywhere else to send it. The lad can either go pick it up there or choose between a list of alternative shipping hubs that the company operates. These are located in major cities in other West African countries. Casablanca generally becomes a temporary stopping point in this scenario, as lads generally don’t want to go there; in comparison, jr makes whichever safari location the lad chooses himself from the list a lot more hospitable. Naturally, any travel expenses the lad incurs are fully reimbursed upon arrival. What could go wrong?

Posted: Sat Jun 22, 2019 2:06 pm

^^^ LOL!

Meanwhile, the lad continues to tracking his parcel. He's full of confidence. Laughing

Posted: Sun Jun 23, 2019 1:35 am

Birlic wrote:

Why she not go (along with a girlfriend as sexy as she) somewhere in a luxury resort, into a national park? Benin or Cameroon?... of course, Cammy will rent a bungalow and pay for Kevin. He just needs to get there, along with another friend of him.

If Kevin fails to deliver with the invitation letter, that's a definite fallback position. Mind you, Cammy will have to choose which of her BGFFs to invite along, and it might have to be Nikki (the lesbian), leaving Cheryl (the bisexual one) for AJ... hey, I'm sure that Kevin and friend would love to watch some of the time.

Posted: Sun Jun 23, 2019 6:36 am

Birlic wrote:

Tomorrow, I will move the parcel to Cairo (Egypt)...

DONE!

Posted: Sun Jun 23, 2019 10:49 pm

Last night's chat was interrupted (and eventually ended) by Firefox fuckups.

O HAI!
How are you doing
Staying indoors. Hey, it's winter.
Ok
Have you eaten
Eating some muffins e'en now.
Ok
What did you have for breakfast?
Nothing
Why?
Nothing....... Not yet hungry
Oh, OK.
Yeah
What's the latest?
Nothing much... Just waiting to hear from the courier service support
What's gone wrong?
Nothing
Just waiting for an update
I thought that service support was whoever you contacted when there's a problem.
Or whoever contacts you.
You know what I'm saying.
Yes cammy
Let's put that aside anyway
Like the Help Desk.
Hey, no need for that snark, dewd.
So what else do you want to talk about?
Ok cammy
How much are you bringing for your stay
Huh? Why would you ask me that?
Because you said you're staying for 4 weeks
I don't know what anything costs over there. I can't plan without knowing about that.
Put yourself in my shoes.
Well, not literally. You wouldn't like it, Bigfoot!
(LOL)
That's why I'm asking because the amount you're bringing determines how long you'll stay
Lol
No it doesn't. Four weeks is four weeks.

I went for a colourful mashup of metaphors that Kevin probably didn't notice.

How much money I bring, like the swallows that bloom in the spring, doesn't matter a hairy rat's ass!
Ok
Is there some fucking equation the immigration people use that works out how long foreigners stay?
No
Because hotels here are very expensive, plus your feeding, the buying and so on....that's
Get me some prices then. I don't want to go to a travel agent - I've had enough ducking and weaving.
And "your feeding"? I'm not a fucking house pet!
Ok....so what would you like me to find out about

First interruption - Cammy will explain

Sorry - gmail crashed.
To answer your question - prices.
Hotels, eateries, admissions to those places you were talking about.
Ok cammy
Can you pass the airport there with $30,000
Four weeks would set me back 30K? Are you jerking my leg?
Lol....I'm not saying that.... I'm just asking just in case ,because things are fucking expensive here
Details please.
Especially the hotels
And remember i still need to get you an officer to defend you

And at that point, Firefox went titsup and I gave up for the night.

ETA - I added some thoughts to Hangouts.

I thought your mama was going to arrange that one.
Anyway, I need to know what costs there are like. They shouldn't be that fucking expensive compared to Australia.

Posted: Mon Jun 24, 2019 5:12 am

Monday

06.10 (nigerian time) - Claude writes to our moron... we need a real & strong identification of the Receiver of the parcel.

Quote:

Dear Kevin,

I've been able to enter the Head's of the Legal Department office and have exposed your case. I have all the necessary details.
The 2 documents earlier presented (your Student Card and Worker's ID Card) are not formally accepted, so they are useless.
The issue related to that receipt (National Identification Number Slip) was studied also by my colleagues at the Legal Office and everyone concluded that the risk is too high to allow identification on the basis of a "precursor" paper to the official act. Nobody understands why you are not taking your National ID Card from the authority that issued that receipt.

Anyway, finally I have managed to use the Internal Regulation and we can use the provision for people without identity (those homeless who sleep on the streets and who do not have a residential address or identity papers). In their case, the so-called Biometric Identification Procedure (BIP) is applied: various body photos (to see any particular signs: scars, tattoos, etc.) are analyzed from multiple angles and the computer creates a unique personal biometric profile.

Please check again if your National ID Card has been issued and send me a scanned copy. It should be the easiest option. I'm, waiting for you.
If not, then we will proceed to the biometric identification (BIP) and I will give you the necessary explanations (there is an exact and clear procedure).
We will have to solve this delicate issue of your correct identification as quickly as possible, otherwise delivery of the parcel will be impossible to do.

Cheers,
Claude

===

07.30 - Kevin, to Claude:

Quote:

Thank you for the update.

Like i said before my identity can has not been issued to me yet just the slip i sent to you that was given to me...according to the authorities in my country it takes a long time before it can be issued.... Please help me in anyway you can

Claude:

Quote:

Good morning Kevin,
In this case, we will use authentication through the BIP (Biometric Identification Procedure).
I will send you a simple sketch, from which you have to understand the two required positions:
#1) With raised hands at the horizontal and feet close to each other,
and
#2) With your hands high above your shoulders and your legs away.

This specific position is called The Vitruvian Man (you can google it) and was imagined by the great scientist Leonardo DaVinci.
It is used in various studies related to ideal human proportions, in recognition of human movements in software programs and was even included in space-sent messages.

I need 8 pictures:
- 2 photos from the front (those two positions: #1 and #2),
- 4 photos from the side / lateral position (2 pictures from the left side and 2 pictures from the right side),
- 2 photos from the back (those two positions: #1 and #2).

You do not have to be completely nude! I repeat, you must have a cloth or wrapped material around your hips!
The pictures must be very clear - so that any particular signs (scars, tattoo, any born sign) can be noticed.

A software algorithm analyzes all those photos and creates a personal biometric profile (yours) that will be used for authentication (at the time of delivery).
Cheers,
Claude

===

08.24 - A short info-message, directly from the PLog servers. Laughing

Quote:

UPDATE: Package #TRK927911*** has been "frozen" and is in the temporary custody of our PLog office in Cairo / Egypt.
For more details and additional information, please contact the Customer Care Department.

The PLog Team

Claude explains that the "frost" procedure is standard, if there are issues related to correct customer authentication / identification... of course, our dear Kevin must send his BIP photos as soon as possible. Laughing

===

10.10 - Kevin_The_Lad to Claude... he seems to be worried. Laughing

Quote:

Thank you for the information.

But i just got a mail that my package has been frozen

Claude explain all the procedure:

Quote:

Hi Kevin,
Yes, this is the standard message when there are legal issues related to the correct identification of the Receiver of the parcel.
You do not have to worry, because this is the procedure in all cases where The Receiver is not able to prove identity.
Send me your BIP photos as soon as possible! If you manage to do it today, then we will be able to unfreeze the package tonight.

Cheers,
Claude

===

10.40 - Half an hour later, our lad wrote to Claude:

Quote:

Ok, I will do that.

===

Posted: Mon Jun 24, 2019 10:44 am

^ Promises are cheap. Kevin seemed to be equivocal at best on chat.

He opened with a frame grab of a message from Birlic; the package is frozen in Egypt!

Oh. What happened?
I don't know
Didn't you ask?
I already did..... I just got their response

He has to send a BIP photo!

What's a BIP Photo?

The Vitruvian Man!

That's it
What the Hel?
I said the same thing
That's BIP?
Yes
A picture of a naked man with eight limbs is a BIP?
Yes...only they said it won't be a nude pic
You've left something out. They must have told you what a BIP pic is!
Yes they did

The detailed explanation of the BIP.

You said you didn't know!
I meant i didn't know why it was necessary
That's odd. Seems like they're reusing an old ID system from over a hundred years ago.
I read a lot of true crime, you see.
Yes cammy
There was a French guy called Bertillon who invented a system of identification that involved measuring parts of the body. It was a neat idea but lost out to fingerprints.

Another jumbled metaphor...

He also invented the idea of the mugshot, so he didn't get totally kicked to the bus.
It makes a sort of sense, but I'm wondering why they'd need it.
Unless.... uh oh...
Because,according to the customer care representative I'm talking to he said the ID's i presented were not good enough
I was about to say, they found out your ID is fake!
So much for that idea!
Lol....no they didn't
How do you know that?
Because he didn't mention anything about the ID being fake
Yeah, whatever.
So what are you going to do?
I'll have to send the BIP
Needs must, yada yada yada, I guess.
Fuck, though. I thought all my worries were over when I handed over that package.
But like I said before, for every solution there's a fucking problem.
Lol...it will be fine
That sounds like the kind of thing that's said just before something goes horribly wrong.
Like when someone says "I got this!"
Lol
And when the dust settles, someone else says, "That was why we can't have nice things."
Lol...cammy you're making me laugh a lot
Hey, I try.
Lol...that's why i can't wait to see you
By the way I'll need a copy of the data page of your international passport and your info
That's, your full name ,age and address
My passport?
Yes
For the invitation letter

I took some time out to think, and decided to go with Cammy's passport (which is the new sort) being unable to be copied (after some issues with copying places balking at xeroxing it).

Fucking chat dropped out again.
My passport's kept in a safe deposit box, so I can't get to it before tomorrow.
I suppose there's no hurry. You need to make certain you get the package first.
Anyhoo, it's pet feeding time, and my turn to cut up the meat for the little darlings. They are so spoiled!

Posted: Mon Jun 24, 2019 11:38 am

^^^ LOL!

- Surely he'll send me some pictures of poor quality, so Claude will ask for some new ones... better ones. Twisted Evil

- Yastreb, please tell me when you want the package to go to Benin / Niger?
As the last destination, because the operating license for Nigeria has been suspended. From there we will begin the pressures, so the idiot will travel. Laughing

Regarding Cammy's passport... hmm, did not it expire last month? And Cammy will only notice this tomorrow?
Of course, Cammy will need to get a new passport ... it's a 2-3 weeks process (until we've resolved "Safari #1 - the trip to Benin").
After that, we can try Safari #2, in the Korup / Pendjari National Park.
===

We have The Vitruvian Man photos (v.01)! Laughing

It's a good start, the idiot understands how to stay in the pictures... but the pictures have to be made out, in the sunlight. Laughing

Quote:

Dear Kevin,
Yes, that's exactly what we need to be able to record your pictures on the visual identification servers.

There is only one issue related to the brightness of the photos. Why did you do it indoors (in the house)? For the light to be excellent and for all the shadows and eventual private born-signs to be analyzed by the software, the pictures must be made in bright light. I mean, outside.
Please re-make them, in exactly the same sequence of movements, but be careful to be out (in the sunlight). The pictures can be taken anywhere: on the street, in the yard, somewhere outside the city. It does not matter as long as there is plenty of light outside.

I'll unfreeze your package now, but I'm waiting for the new set of photos, made in the right conditions and clear.

Cheers,
Claude

===
One hour later, the lad wrote to Claude:

Quote:

Ok, I will do that. But at the moment it's raining....so that will be later

Claude:

Quote:

Hi Kevin,
Yeah, sure, no problem. Tomorrow it will be okay.
I'll unlock the package, but it's absolutely necessary to have the photos needed for identification.
Failing, the frost procedure will come again.

Cheers,
Claude

===

This idiot is one of those with whom Linoline is playing now in the topic here: http://forum.419eater.com/forum/viewtopic.php?p=2397189#2397189
We have the same lad in two different stories! Laughing

Posted: Tue Jun 25, 2019 1:16 am

^ Cf. Cammy's passport expiring... that would mean she'd got a passport at 16. Then again, she might have done that in order to have a commonly acceptable ID, given that she can't get a driving licence, and in the name White in order to have a clean break with her father by rejecting his family name. So I'll go with that.

And that's why we can't have nice things.

Posted: Tue Jun 25, 2019 5:18 am

Tuesday

Yesterday, late evening, Kevin wrote to Claude:

Quote:

I'm sorry but there is a problem now......it's still raining and everywhere is kind of cloudy so i promise to do it first thing tomorrow morning

06.00 - I've already moved his parcel in Algiers.

Quote:

UPDATE: The parcel # TRK927911*** is located now in our warehouse at Houari Boumediene Airport - Algiers. We will keep you up to date.

The PLog Team

===

- As I said yesterday, I discovered that this idiot is one of the guys Linoline works with in this topic: https://forum.419eater.com/forum/viewtopic.php?t=299985 (page#20)
- From what we know for now, our boy (Kevin) is a friend of Egobia's son / nephew (Egobia is a cunning scammer, whom we have met many times).
Laughing

===

07.42 - From our lad:

Quote:

Sorry but why does it look like my package is going the wrong way.... It's suppose to be heading for Nigeria.....

By the way I'll send my BIP soon

Claude, innocent 100%. Laughing

Quote:

Hi Kevin,

I do not understand what you mean by "the wrong way"! Please explain.
Your package has been unlocked and is now on its way to the final destination.
I'm waiting for the new BIP photos and I hope they will meet the requirements.

Cheers,
Claude

===

10.09 - Let's make him happy! Laughing

Quote:

UPDATE: The parcel # TRK927911*** is located now in our warehouse at Mohammed V Int'l Airport - Casablanca / Morocco. We will keep you up to date.

The PLog Team

===

12.20 - Kevin to Claude... he also sent me 8 new photos. Laughing

Quote:

The package is ought To come straight to Nigeria, Lagos to precise. I don't understand why it's going the wrong way.

It's ought to come down to Nigeria, please understand this explanation.

Claude:

Quote:

Hi Kevin,

All parcels shipping are based on what is called, in the specialized language, The Consolidation Process. This operation requires that several packages (from different countries or directions) be gathered together (in the same location) and then sent together to a unique destination. Sometimes there are delays and parcels do not arrive in a timely manner, so the pickup time is prolonged. But the Consolidation process reduces massively the transport costs. I checked our servers right now and I can confirm that your parcel has just reached our main hub in Africa (Casablanca - Morocco).

I confirm that I have received those 8 photos and I will immediately send them to the IT department for processing. Your personal and unique biometric profile will be created that will be compared to the one made on the day of delivery. I repeat, on the set day for delivery you must send a second set of pictures. Computerized processing takes 60-90 minutes, so it's good to do it in a timely manner. The two biometric profiles (today = profile #1 and the one on delivery date = profile #2) are compared and are thus established if the person taking the parcel (profile #2) is the same as the person analyzed in profile #1.

Probably within 1-2 days, all the parcels to be brought in the same part of Africa will be collected in Casablanca and the shipment to the destination will be resumed. You will be permanently informed about this and you of course will be able to track online the route of your package.

Cheers,
Claude

The Vitruvian Man v.02 - accepted! Twisted Evil

===

===

13.15 - Kevin:

Quote:

Will the package be delivered to my doorstep?

Claude... assuring the idiot that everything will be perfect! Laughing

Quote:

Yes Kevin, if possible, then the courier comes directly to the address. Normally, there is a mail contact beforehand.
We have local delivery teams, and the local manager will notify you when your parcel arrives in the destination country.
There is also the option where you can take the package directly from the local warehouse. As you wish.

Cheers,
Claude

Posted: Tue Jun 25, 2019 12:39 pm

Are you there
I'll just check.
Yes!
How are you doing
Straight off, some not-good news.
I went to get my passport - you wanted a copy, right?
Fucking thing's expired. Just three weeks ago, too.
Yes
Your passport?
Ya think, Kevin?
Of course my fucking passport!
I'll have to apply for a new one.
Fuck !!....
Dunno how long that's going to take.
My thoughts exactly.
A couple of weeks, minimum.
Cutting things a bit fine, I know.
Ok.....will it affect your visa application
Well, duh, of course.
OMG
How are you going to do the invite letter without it?
You said you'd need it.
I'll just have to wait until you get it
Again, well, duh, of course.
What's the latest on the package then? Good news?
Yeah....it has been unfrozen
And it's in Africa already

He attached the first picture from P-Log.

Kewl!
How long now?
I can't say how long
What's next to Algeria?
Morocco
Must in in Rabat, then. That's the capital.
No it's not

Then he attached the second picture from P-Log.

Nouaceur... how the Hel do you say that?
Lol....i have no idea
Rhetorical question, actually.
Glad you got things going right in the end.
Have you got a place to store the cash when it arrives?
Yeah me to
My account
Isn't that going to attract attention? Maybe the wrong kind?
Did I say something wrong?
No it won't
Seriously?
50K in greenbacks and no-one will even raise an eyebrow at that?
I mean, you're a student, no job...
Apart from the hairdresser's (LOL)
Lol....there won't be any problem
Hey, it's your funeral dewd, just saying...
Something I meant to ask a while back; what's your neighbourhood like?
It's kind of ghetto
Meaning what exactly?
Is that supposed to be in a good way?
Lol...I mean it's rough
Oh. Not a bit like Glebe, then.
Glebe is pretty swish. Lots of professionals, yuppies and dinkies.
Glebe
Not like Balmain, where I grew up. That was sorta rough.
And yes, Glebe.
Dunno why you repeated me.
I said Glebe because i didn't understand
Context, dewd. You should have able to work out that I'm talking about my suburb.
Oh ok
So when are you gonna apply for the passport
As soon as I can.
Ok cammy
What are you doing now
Chatting with you.
Same question, always same answer.
It's like you've made a bet or something.
On what
On whether I'll give you a different answer some day.
No....was just asking if you were busy that's why
Define "busy."
Lol....like if you were watching TV or maybe working on some modeling routine
Actually you're not too far off in some ways.
How
AJ handles the actual contracts; I often do things like look for sites for photoshoots, or see what's trending in cosplay.
Ok
Though this time I was reading some links that a GF in Adelaide sent me.
Ok cammy
Beth tends to the serious news stories.
When you come to Nigeria.... Am i allowed to kiss you
Not until after we leave the airport.
(At the earliest)
Lol....OK
But I'm not really a good kisser
I'd expect that of a virgin. But don't worry, I'll provide tuition.
Now for a delicate question...
Actually one delicate and another more ordinary.
The ordinary one first.
How tall are you?
Ok cammy
I don't know
That's the problem i don't know how to measure my height
Find someone whose height you know and stand next to him.
Ok
Or go into a shop where they have the doors marked with black and white stripes so the attendants can say how tall the robbers are.
Ok
But I'm guessing I'm 5.1

That came as a surprise. Was it actually a misprint?

That's 155 cm.
I'm taller than you.
How tall are you
161 cm, or a touch of 5 foot 3 in Imperials.
Danm
AJ says I'm a cute little love-bundle.
What's the matter?
Lol....you are sure taller

So he's not going to say he meant 5.11? Not what I expected.

That's what I said.
But you said that like it's a bad thing.
Lol...it's not
So what's with the "Damn"?
Lol....don't mind me
So what's your delicate question
Not sure if there's any point now.
Although, you know what they say about men with big feet...
Lol......just ask your question
They need big shoes.
Ha ha.
Lol
To put it bluntly - how big is your duck?
No! Your dick!
Of all the fucking times to do that!!!!!!1

I actually mis-typed, and then I thought, what the hell, let it go...

I can't say until you see it
Don't tell me you don't know.
Lol...should i send a pic
No!
Dick pix are for fuckwits.
Ok
Let me just say it's big
They all say that.
Every himbo and incel says that.
Anyhoo, it's late. I hope to hear good news tomorrow.

Posted: Tue Jun 25, 2019 1:25 pm

^^^ LOL!

Kelvin writes to Claude:

Quote:

I'll like it to be delivered to my doorstep

Yes, of course, no problem! Laughing

Quote:

Hi Kevin,

All practical delivery details need to be discussed with our local manager there. OK?
I am just a kind of coordinator in the Customer Care Department and I do not know exactly all the details of the functioning of our local branches.
The local specificity is different from one african country to another, so that nobody can ever say they know everything.
Things change sometimes from month to month, but you already know very well what is the rhythm of life in Africa.
In any case, you can track the package in real time and at the time of delivery you will be contacted by the local manager.
If I'm not mistaken, our headquarters in Abuja is now led by Miss Fabienne Ko*******.

Cheers,
Claude

==

One hour later (15.30), Kevin writes to Claude:

Quote:

Thank you for the information. ........when exactly should i send another BIP

Claude:

Quote:

Exactly on the day set for delivery. The morning of that day, before the delivery agent reaches you, you need to send a new fresh set of BIP shots.
Their software processing will likely take about 2 hours, so it's good to do it in the morning so that the delivery is not delayed too much.

Cheers,
Claude

If we manage to send Kevin on a trip, then it will surely be difficult for him to take "panties" pictures in a foreign country. On the street. LOL! Laughing

===

17.20 - More fun with Kevin. He is anxious to send other pictures with him in panties. Laughing

Quote:

Ok, thank you.

and

Quote:

Do you know the delivery day or will i be contacted the day before... So that I'll be ready

Claude:

Quote:

Hi Kevin,

You will be notified when the parcel reaches the custody of the local manager.
So, the day of delivery will be set together, you and him, depending on our branch working program and your free time.

Cheers,
Claude

===

Posted: Wed Jun 26, 2019 7:22 am

Wednesday

08.21 - The parcel has reached Dakar airport. Our lad received a brief info message form the PLog servers. Laughing

Quote:

UPDATE: The parcel # TRK927911*** is located now in our warehouse at Leopold Sedar Senghor - Dakar / Senegal. We will keep you up to date.

The PLog Team

===

In the coming days, the parcel will arrive in:
- Kotoka International Airport - Accra / Ghana,
- Parakou Airport - Benin,
... and finally arrives in Niamey, Niger. The local manager in Niger (Mr. Qesha) will invite our dear Kevin to come and pick up the parcel there. Twisted Evil

Yastreb, when do you want to start "the show"? In this weekend or from Monday (next week)?
===

08.56 - Claude to Kevin:

Quote:

'morning Kevin,
Your parcel has reached Dakar airport commercial hub. I just received one short note from the automate monitoring system.
Cheers,
Claude

===

10.16 - Our lad to Claude... he is happy, but somewhat worried about any other delivery costs. Laughing

Quote:

Great, thanks for letting me know.

and

Quote:

Hope i won't be charged for delivery

Claude to the lad:

Quote:

Hi Kevin,
Our internal documents referring to this package confirms that all fees related to the operation of transport and delivery are paid by the sender Cammy Wh***.
Therefore, there is no additional cost for you. At the time of delivery you will only need to sign a receipt (an internal document that the driver completes there) confirming that the parcel was delivered intact.
Nothing else.

Cheers,
Claude

Our boy is happy. Laughing

Quote:

Thank you for the clarification.

===

"Hello beautiful" - Cammy's new Lad	View next topic View previous topic