Handjob guy

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Posted: Tue Jan 04, 2005 7:47 pm

This is from the Handjob Service guy:

Quote:

From: "G. Horst"
Date: Tue, 4 Jan 2005
To: ibuttmunch
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Payment modalities
Dear Sir,

I presented myself in three different location to have the money
picked up but all of them came up with the same check, no money
found. I was greatly embarrassed especially at the last location.
Please ask the Agency [WU220] validate the transaction them have not
psoted it in their system.

I am greatly troubled and can't sleep at all.

I am waiting anxiously for your immediate response so as to go back
in the morning.

I also did check the transaction myself in western union website
[order status ] but it wasn't there. My telephone line is open and in
very sound order.

Expedite action on this.

Regards,
Johnson

I insisted the money was there...I'm trying to get his ass over to Benin City. 200 miles away or so from Lagos.

Posted: Tue Jan 04, 2005 8:41 pm

Well, if he can't sleep he might just as well go on a safari. The only remedy for insomnia in mugu land.

Posted: Tue Jan 04, 2005 8:59 pm

McFlib...why not send him an email that looks like it came from him stating that he picked up the money in Benin City, and would like you to now ship the package to a street addy, I'm sure that we can locate a good safari address for the lad to roam to, and could you have it arrive on a specific date. This will allow the lad time to get there and wait for the package and possibly get his money back from whoever was impersonating him.
If you haven't gotten any pics of this scammer, then you can send him one of any other scammer and ask if that is him and get him on the scriptlet above for safari goodness.

Not quite a Newb Joined: 06 Nov 2004 Posts: 38

Guest came up with a good way to address the "checked the website" issue.

Posted: Thu Jan 06, 2005 3:51 am

At first blush, the process in the link pointed to by Homesmythe's post sounds like an excellent way to beat the online checking capability WU has provided. After a bit of thought though... I've had lads tell me they know someone in WU, so won't have any difficulty with ID. If they know a clerk, is it not possible that a clerk would tell the lad the test question and answer, allowing him to pick up the fund, albeit small? Am I missing something here?

Posted: Thu Jan 06, 2005 4:55 am

thanks for the suggestions!

I told this lad that he needs to go to Benin City. Period.
Want the money? it's in Benin City. Not gonna change it. Not gonna listen anymore.

He complained to the bishop (who roped his ass into this). But Ima, the lawyer, slapped the lad for that. Dont complain to my clients! What a dick.

Anyway, he has a choice now. The money is in Benin City...will he go?

I think he will. That was a fine banner he made and sent, plus several photos and a couple sets at that...alot invested.

Solitary is right, he'll sleep better in another town. Twisted Evil

Posted: Thu Jan 06, 2005 8:09 am

Quote:

a lot invested.

That's the key! Cool

Not quite a Newb Joined: 06 Nov 2004 Posts: 38

pilgrim wrote:

At first blush, the process in the link pointed to by Homesmythe's post sounds like an excellent way to beat the online checking capability WU has provided. After a bit of thought though... I've had lads tell me they know someone in WU, so won't have any difficulty with ID. If they know a clerk, is it not possible that a clerk would tell the lad the test question and answer, allowing him to pick up the fund, albeit small? Am I missing something here?

So far this hasn't happened, though an interesting question. I imagine though, since the transfer was not in the name of the receiver, nor did they have question/answer or the correct amount, that the person who has rightful claim to the money (namely the sender) would have a serious issue if it were to be picked up by someone else. The breach in security would be obvious. Time will tell if this modality is fruitful, but the risk seems low and the payoff high. For now though, it seems to be a good way to get lazy, WU site-surfing mugus off their asses and into their Nikes.

Posted: Thu Jan 06, 2005 9:51 pm

@rogerme - looks like he opened the door himself to your possibility!
Check it:

Quote:

Dear Mr.Buttmunch,

In the first place I never asked you to send the money to Benin
City,You can see my PAYMENT MODALITY FILE. I don't know why you feel
reluctant to ask the agency to change the payment city. It is a
matter of phone call. It will take me a good hard driving of 12hrs to
drive from my location to Benin City coupled with the bad roads and
armed robbery operation which very rampant on that road, I don't know
why you are doing this to me?, just call the agent and have them
change the location which must be opened and payable in any part of
ther country.

Your request for L/C based on the western union receipt is not
obtainable here. Our economy is basically on cash transaction and not
otherwise.

You must do something right away concerning this otherwise this money
could lost. Pride doesn't pay, if we have to work together we must
respect each others opinion. I am a very humble person therefore it
will out of place for you to tag me as a difficult person, I don't
know how you will feel if you wake up one and discovered that the
money has been given to a wrong person due to your constant
insistence that I must go to Benin City, I am very busy man and it
won't cost you more than a phone call to change the whole
arrangements.

Regards,
Johnson

Payment modality file! lol! I think we should all be required to ask for one prior to sending any fake money from now on.

Well he said someone else might get it...I will send him back a "Why are you complaining when you've already gotten the money. The second installment is on its way with the same modalities" email, complete with name and address of his assistant who got the money. Perhaps that will get him off his arse.

Posted: Fri Jan 07, 2005 2:13 pm

He's bent that someone else got the money...but it looks like he's not going to go to Benin City. Although the next installment is still going there.

Quote:

Dear Mr.Buttmunch,

I wish to state here categorically that I did not collect any money
nor neither have I stepped my foot in Benin City. An imposter must
have forged my name and collected the money. It has been so long
there and someone in western union must have given out the
information to someone else since no one came for the money all this
while, I warned you of this but you were so pround and sturbon to
listen to a simple reason.

I will make my complain to your associate because you threated me
like a scum which I can't stand here and tolerate after having spent
so much to give you all that was required.

Goodday, if you like send the next installment to Benin City again,
and believe me I can never go to BeniN cITY FOR THE SAKE OF
GOLLECTING WESTERN UNION from anyone. It is my heart desire to
honestly work with you but you seemed to it all.

If you are in dount then ask western union to present the ID used in
the collection while I send mine. I gave you a name for the
transaction, and Nigeria means payment to be open for collection in
any part of the country as my business take me round the country, if
you had told me you are sending to Brnin City[ Very Dangerous palce
to do business] I would have advised you otherwise, and when I did
you declined to adhere to my instruction.

Regards,
Johnson

Plus now he's just turning whiney and boring. Have to see what I can do about that...

Posted: Tue Jan 11, 2005 3:16 pm

After many a series of emails, he's finally ready to cut his loses - which is a pretty good amount.

Quote:

Dear Sir,

The attach is the last message I got from Mr.Buttmunch, all efforts
for him to respond to my request proves furtile, what he gave me was
a fake western union control number, I have on many ocassion asked
him to give me the complete control as I discovered that the number
is 9 digits instead of 10. Uptil this moment Mr.Buttmunch has not
responded to my messages, even the telephone number he gave to me was also a fake number, this made me to wonder if this is a true
transaction or if somebody somewhere is playing on some peoples
intelligence.

I think the matter is left for you to be addressed as I have never
received a cent from Mr.Buttmunch, even the purported transaction to
Benin City was all a rouse, nothing was sent to Benin City that I can
proof to you anyday.

If this project is not going to be realistic as promises are never
fulfilled then let me know and count my losses in good faith.

Regards,
Johnson

Plus he still thinks the bishop and ima buttmunch are 2 different people. Rolling Eyes

So maybe I'll have to get my lawyer hauled in on embezzlement charges and get johnson here into the WU a couple more times...

Posted: Tue Jan 11, 2005 3:52 pm

Quote:

I have on many ocassion asked him to give me the complete control as I discovered that the number is 9 digits instead of 10. Uptil this moment Mr.Buttmunch has not responded to my messages, even the telephone number he gave to me was also a fake number, this made me to wonder if this is a true transaction or if somebody somewhere is playing on some peoples intelligence.

Er... take a guess mugu! Rolling Eyes

McF, who's the letter from Johnson addressed to - is it the Bishop? And if so, how can the Bishop be sure that Johnson and Mr Buttmunch aren't in this together? Johnson offered to prove that no money was sent to Benin - so ask him to prove it. Twisted Evil

Posted: Tue Jan 11, 2005 4:06 pm

OH Jez you devil! I like that! A conspiracy...and he *does* think they're different people...yes it was sent to the bishop - he's whining. Crying or Very sad

I asked him to prove his allegations already (prior to your post):

Quote:

Johnson,
This is disturbing news! How do you know he did not
send the money to Benin City as you say? Let me know
your proof, as this is serious business to charge
someone with embezzlement.

Also, I just spoke with Mr. Buttmunch about this
situation, so his phone number is certainly not fake.
Perhaps you have the wrong number.

Finally, I opened the attachment you sent me. (He forwarded me the 3 meg tmp file I sent him from the other account...) It all
looks in order to me. What is the problem? I see 10
numbers, not 9. As has been said before, you can lead
a horse to water, but you cannot make him drink. If
you just print out the attachment, take it to the
bank.

We're there any other problems?

Blessings to you!

But when he doesn't prove anything, of course, I will say I have proof indeed the money was picked up and that the lawyer is 'talking from behind bars'. Laughing

Posted: Tue Jan 11, 2005 4:38 pm

Johnson is going to get seriously mindfucked! I like it Twisted Evil

BTW, next time, try my friend's variation on that horse to water thing:

Quote:

You can take a horse to water but a pencil has to be lead

That should keep him busy for another few hours at least.

Hello I'm New here! Joined: 15 Dec 2004 Posts: 8

Off topic I know, McFlibbish, but what did you do to that nice man Laughing

Chinonso Peter for that rather interesting statement.

Posted: Tue Jan 11, 2005 5:07 pm

@bubs This was the bait >> He knew the whole time he was being baited but couldn't stop himself the greedy turd.

jez's 'friend' wrote:

You can take a horse to water but a pencil has to be lead

Badum crash! Two shows nightly, no shoving people... Very Happy

He won't safari, so I'm wondering how Johnson can 'prove' he didn't embezzle the money with Ima?

Posted: Tue Jan 11, 2005 6:24 pm

He won't be able to prove anything - the only way he'll be able to clear his name is to make a much better effort to collect the money next time. Twisted Evil

Posted: Tue Jan 11, 2005 8:20 pm

oh now he's signing his emails with the name of the guy who I made up got the money in Benin...he's gone and gotten himself in trouble! Very Happy

Quote:

Dear Mr.Buttmunch,

Please accept my sincere apology for the strong words used on your
goodself. This was as a result cheer fraustration. I will attend to
the matter as soon as the bank opens tomorrow morning. Once again
thanks very much for your co-operation.

Sincerely yours,
Johnson C.

This was sent after I told him I left off the leading zero and gave him a new dll to print out.
But he just implicated himself in the whole Benin embezzlement! tsk tsk.

I'm thinking he might be sending a couple more 'strong words' tomorrow Laughing

EDIT: This was sent to the bishop in response to the above email:

Quote:

Dear Sir,

Sorry if sounded so hard to everyone, it was a result of the
situation here jumping from one bank to another only to find out that
the control number is not complete, the issue in question as clearly
stated that I couldn't download the attachment because I don't have
the software, however, Mr.Buttmunch ignored series of my mails
requesting for the correct control number, he has however, a few
moment ago re-send the attachment and all seems to be in order. I
will be at the bank tomorrow morning and will revert to you
accoedingly.

I must commend you for your effort in resolving this matter quickly
and efficiently. And again, I never say there was an act of
embezzelment rather that something is wrong somewhere.

My sincere regards to your entire family. More blessings.

Regards,
Johnson C.

Posted: Tue Jan 11, 2005 9:12 pm

I love it. clapping

Keep us posted!

Posted: Wed Jan 12, 2005 2:39 pm

Wow...*every* WU? Shocked

That's alot Laughing

Quote:

Dear Mr.Buttmunch,

I have been to almost every western union locations in Lagos, No
transaction could be found on your western union control number
0458763215. Please cross check and advise. Also note that your
attachment could not be downloaded because it the file was corrupted,
I suggest you resend same.

Regards,
Johnson C.

Well now Johnson is in for a rude awakening as the money has indeed been picked up again!

Guest

Quote:

Well now Johnson is in for a rude awakening as the money has indeed been picked up again!

Presumably from one of the few WU offices he did not check ! Laughing

Guest

Perhaps he can call a certain WU operator? Smile

There are a lot of WU locations in Nigeria, as this lad found when he called me to get his money transfer.. Wink

you may have already heard that one, it's from a while ago.. 13 minutes worth of WU locations..

no, scratch that link, the audio is terrible! heck, I wonder what happened to the file, it seems to be damaged..

Cheers,
EK

Posted: Wed Jan 12, 2005 4:25 pm

Quote:

I have been to almost every western union locations in Lagos

"ALMOST" is not good enough - he has to go to them ALL!

Posted: Thu Jan 13, 2005 2:52 pm

@jez damn straight!

Well he is a very prolific writer. Just ignore him for a day and he writes and writes...This was his latest offering. I found it humourous:

Quote:

Subject: URGENT FROM JOHNSON CHINOSO
CC: thebishop

Dear Sirs,

I am baffled at your attitudes concerning this, I told you there was
no sign of the money because it is not the western union record or
system, but you feel indifference about this, I thought you should be
worried. The last time you said you sent money to B/City, and that it
was collected by me, I openly told you that I never went to B/City
talkless of making the collection, instead of you to say something
concerning your allegation what you did was send another money to
Lagos without clearing the first fact, now the money purported to
have been sent to Lagos can not be traced anywhere alas you feel as
if nothing has happened. Well if this is a game I don't think I am
worth playing it because I am too old chasing the shadows.

If it is all a designed plan to obtain money from NGO's and pass the
buck to me, then God bless you. I was thinking if this is a true
transaction you will be more worried than me concerning the incorrect
or forged western union control numbers you have sent to me.

Often times have I asked for your elephone number, what you did was
to give a non-functional one which of course means one thing, you
don't want me to reach you at any cost. If you both are sincere in
your dealings then let me have your numbers and complete mailing
address, as well as the correct western union control numbers of the
2 payment[ BENIN CITY AND LAGOS] alike.

I have been embarrassed too many times to venture for another wild
goose chase. Be serious and let me know what game you are up to. And
if you don't wish to continue then let me have my banner back,
including the mailing cost and other expenses incurred otherwise you
will be speaking to my lawyers in USA or the FBI sooner than you can
think of.
Regards,
Johnson C.

Yeah right! Get banner back pffffffffft. Razz

FBI? haha ok.

I sent him 'the money has been picked up again' - it'll be interesting to see his response:

Quote:

Sir,
I do not know what you are speaking about.

I called my branch of the Western Union and they told
me the money had been picked up. Just like the money
in Benin was picked up.

I am beginning to suspect that it is YOU who are
playing a game, saying you did not get the money in
order to get my fine clients at the Helping Handjob
Service to send more money.

There will be a request for a full accounting of the
moneys from Western Union, to be sure.

Also, you keep demanding my mailing address and phone
number. These were given to you and Stiffany many
months ago at the opening of negotiations. Stiffany
even sent mail just recently. Please speak with her
about your anger issues.

Good day,
I. Buttmunch

Posted: Thu Jan 13, 2005 3:02 pm

Did you refer him to www.westernunion.info.ms to retrieve his unique MTCN? Very Happy