Rev. Eze - stranded for 3 days in Cotonou

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Posted: Mon Oct 01, 2018 11:59 am

Congratulations everybody! The reverend looks pretty happy wringing his hands in anticipation of the money. So much sweeter will it be when he gets nothing. Laughing

Posted: Mon Oct 01, 2018 12:46 pm

^^^ Ohh, yeah! He will be delighted a little bit later, when he will receive all the good news about "the car reparation". Laughing

13.42 - Manager Akwoodi wrote to our moron:

Quote:

Salam brother, everything is all right, there to you? I hope that the car repair will end as soon as possible. I told my nephew Joojoo to keep you up to date with the situation. Mash'Allah, Akwoodi

- Rev. Eze, calm and patient:

Quote:

Still waiting for them here
Thank you
PrinceAnthony

Already there are more than 3 hours since the idiots looked after the company's car. Laughing

- Manager Akwudi:

Quote:

Brother Eze, salam! Have you been eating something for lunch? Send me the picture with the receipt of the restaurant so I can arrange the settlement of the amount. Mash'Allah, Akwoodi

===

14.17 - Brother Josephus sent the message above to "dear pastor" Francis (by forward)... the one message that "revealed" the fact that Eze is now in Cotonou to take over the parcel with money and electronics... we all hope this will create big disagreements between all those bastards. Laughing

Quote:

Rev Francise,

Can you shed some light on what is going on here? I have not heard back from Bishop Select Eze, his priority this weekend was supposed to be finishing up his requirements to be officially named Bishop of Africa and we were to begin serious work on the cathedral. Well I have not heard from him, and now I find out he is picking up the package that is meant for YOUR Parish?
Can you shed some light on what is going on here? I have not heard from him and now with this new development?

Brother Josephus

===

14.47 - Our Reverend Eze, worried:

Quote:

My friend,
While we're waiting, I want to know the position of the car.
Thanks

PrinceAnthony

... and, ten minutes later, the same message to Joojoo:

Quote:

My friend,
While we're waiting, I want to know the position of the car.
Thanks

PrinceAnthony

15.04 - My manager Akwudi:

Quote:

Salam brother Eze!
From what I see on the company's servers, the position of the GPS transmitter attached to the package indicates a position somewhere in the Bohicon peripherals. That is, exactly where Joojoo told me there was that workshop where he tried to repair the car. I'm going to get in touch with him so we can see what the exact situation is. Please tell me if everything is okay with you, if you have everything you need (water, food). Were you somewhere to eat?
Mash'Allah,
Akwoodi

The idiots are waiting there for over 5 hours. Laughing

===

15.17 - Our Reverend, more worried:

Quote:

My dear friend Akwoodi,
Thank you so far for all your efforts.
We haven't been relaxed enough to talk about eating because we we're looking at going back to Lagos today.
Please I just want to know the exact time it will get to the stadium area.
Once again thank you.

PrinceAnthonyG.Eze

- Manager Akwoodi:

Quote:

Brother Eze, salamu alaykum! Joojoo has not yet responded to my messages, so I suppose it's beside the car, somewhere outside. As soon as I know something, I will come back with all the details to you. Please do not stay there for nothing! Go and eat something, stay comfortable and do not worry about spending. We will settle any kind of invoice or receipt! Mash'Allah! Akwoodi

===

Posted: Mon Oct 01, 2018 2:33 pm

I love the smell of lad pain in the morning. Congratulations to Birlic, sparky905, and sportbluecanyon! Nicodim will send a message to the lads asking about what is happening.

Posted: Mon Oct 01, 2018 3:14 pm

^^^ Congrats to all members of the Eze's Team: sportbluecanyon (as initiator of this story), sparky905, Thursten3rd and MrMystery314.
Gentlemen, it was a real great pleasure for me to work with you! clapping

===

15.30 - Our Reverend wrote to manager Akwoodi:

Quote:

Alright my brother,
I will try and do that while for an information from you and hoping to do businesses with you in a higher capacity after this.
Thanks
PrinceAnthony

16.12 - My manager's answer:

Quote:

Salam! My brother, what do you do in yours everyday life? My family sells African art products in some commercial galleries in the US. I take advantage of my position in the company and transport all my family products from Benin directly to Seattle headquarters without additional costs. There I have some relatives dealing with selling. These are wooden statuettes, traditional jewelery, traditional fabrics. This genre of authentic art, which sells quickly and at good prices. You? Because you are also a Muslim brother, maybe together we can make business profitable for both sides. Mash'Allah! Akwoodi

I'm trying to keep him in Cotonou for as long as it's too late to go back to Lagos. Laughing

===

16.21 - Rev. Eze, again:

Quote:

Dear brother Akwoodi,
Greetings to you. In line with what you said about your family line of business, when I get back to Lagos, I will give you a link with some top exporters of these crafts.
I believe that they're going to be a big part of the progress of your family business.
Meanwhile have you heard anything about the position of the Van and your brother Joojoo?

Thanks
PrinceAnthony

16.31 - Manager Akwoodi:

Quote:

Brother Eze, yes, I was able to get in touch with him. He was in one of the local Bohicon's restaurants (he was hungry) but he promised me to go back to the workshop to see what the situation is. Probably it takes 30-40 minutes. I will be back to you with details. Salam, Akwoodi

===

16.37 - Our moron, to Joojoo... he starts to become desperate because he seems to have waited too long. No shit, Sherlock? Twisted Evil

- Well, our dear Reverend, there will be more than a few delicate moments. Laughing

Quote:

Dear Joojoo,

Having been here for about 7¹/2 hours, I feel I should know your position now.
How are you and the Van?

Waiting for your response.
PrinceAnthony

16.45 - Joojoo finally answered to our moron... of course, everything will be more clear in 30 minutes.

Quote:

HAFL AN HOUR AM RITURN TO DA CAR . WI TALK LATR . NOW AM SOMWHRE RESTURANT TO LUNCHH

16.56 - Rev. Eze, patient:

Quote:

Alright my friend.
You mean that you're going to be here in about half an hour time?
Thanks while I wait.

PrinceAnthony

=== === === ===

THE CRISIS

17.25 - After 7 hours of waiting, our idiots have found that the van (carrying their valuable parcel) can not be repaired today. Laughing

Quote:

Brother Eze, salam! I managed to communicate right now with Joojoo, who is extremely upset.
1) Repair can not be done today because the new piece (the radiator is broken and could not be glued) will arrive at the workshop only tomorrow morning. Under these conditions, Joojoo will have to sleep in Bohicon tonight.
2) We chose the Des Princes Hotel because it has an excellent cuisine and is in the middle of the city. I told Juju that you would arrive there tonight and he would have to pay for your personal room and all your expenses.
3) From where you are now, in a straight line, are just 4 km to the Place de l'Etoile Rouge, where is the main bus station. There are many local buses and you have to take a bus to Alada - Bohicon. It's just 120 km and it's a short road of 1.5-2 hours. Hotel Des Princes is located right in downtown of Bohicon and everyone knows where it is. Juju will be there.
4) Tomorrow, after the repair will be done, Joojoo will bring you back to the border with Nigeria. All your expenses are the responsibility of our company. I deeply regret the unpleasant situation and I hope your stay is as pleasant as possible under these conditions! Mash'Allah! Akwoodi

17.44 - Well, our idiots decided to spend the night in Cotonou. Laughing

Quote:

Dear friend Akwoodi,
It's a regrettable situation anyway, but it's an act of God. No blame to anybody.

However I want to inform you that instead of traveling that this night after standing outside even under the rain, I will rather Lodge in a hotel in here in Cotonou and wait patiently till tomorrow morning.

Thanks for all your efforts so far.
PrinceAnthonyG.Eze

- My manager Akwoodi:

Quote:

Masah'l Kheir, frere Eze! I'm glad you're optimistic and I feel we'll get along well after all this business is over. Please send me a picture after the hotel invoice, as well as a picture of you and your brother in front of the hotel. I want to ask those in the headquarters to allow me to settle all your expenses on this trip. I will go to my home and we resume the discussions tomorrow morning. Salam! Akwoodi

===

Baiting Guru Joined: 25 Jul 2017 Posts: 2107

In the background of the main story is the scamming banker and wannabe hacker, Victoria. She has been feeding Eze's associate "Dr. E." with insider information knowing full well it gets back to Eze. Since Eze has neglected his religious obligations of late in favour of more secular pursuits (i.e. the package), there are undercurrents of his funding being cut off, including the re-call of the package....just as it is almost within his grasp.

Quote:

Can you, as his friend, enlighten me as to what is keeping him from his duties? I can advise he be given more time but he must provide a timetable for each of the church's directives. There is even talk of all funding being withheld until he complies.

If the church recalls the package it will be because of the bishop elect not complying with church protocols. As always, it is the lad's fault.

Posted: Mon Oct 01, 2018 7:05 pm

When I asked both of them for updates, Eze responded:

Quote:

Dear Father Nicodim,
Grace and peace be multiplied to you in Jesus Christ name.
In the grace of the Holy Lamb of God, I have come all the way from Lagos to Cotonou to pick up the package.
While waiting at the venue that we agreed to meet and pick it up, your email came and I have to reply immediately.
As we make progress, I will surely keep you posted.

Shalom ha'mashach!!

He sounds very cheerful for someone who is going to be stuck in Benin for a few days. It will be a good experience for him. Nothing from Francis, surprisingly enough.

Posted: Mon Oct 01, 2018 7:14 pm

20.13 - From manager Akwoodi, a short poke.

Quote:

Salam! Everything is okay with you? Where are you staying overnight? You need something, can I do something for you? Tesbah'la Kheir brother! Akwoodi

Posted: Mon Oct 01, 2018 7:39 pm

Nicodim sent a long message to both of them:

Quote:

I should apologize for being curt before, but I had to send off an email before a friendly meeting with some of the other clergy about your case. All shipping updates are being relayed to me intermittently and only based on what I have been forwarded/told by others, but is it true that you are currently spending the night in Cotonou while waiting for the driver to meet you? These delays are inevitable, of course, but we must learn to take them in stride and move on. Perhaps these delays are a test of your faith; now that is an interpretation which I could support. It's beautiful in a way: this pilgrimage months-long in the making is testing your faith and drive to move on. We must all accept what He plans for us, and who knows? Maybe He wishes for us to all fret and worry together about when we can finally succeed in our task. Who are we to wonder how long He wishes this to take? I would have thought that you would be back in your beds at home right now, dreaming of all the good you can do for your parish. But maybe it is something else. Maybe you will spend years out there. Maybe you will spend days. I would hope that you would have to only spend days, but your destiny is in His hands now. And you can take all the steps you would like to speed up or slow down, but what is done will be done when it is done. I cannot be more succinct than that.

But I cannot make this clear enough: do not return empty-handed. Do not render all of our struggles to be in vain. Do not make weeks of tracking the package as it inches its way from Aberdeen to Africa a waste. That would be a travesty the likes of which I had never seen before. And I do not think that you would be too happy with this outcome either, would you? Would you really be happy with this outcome, having wasted months of your time and your parish's time, having wasted tons of naira on things that do not matter, having raised your parish's hopes all for nothing? Is this really what you would want? I would like to imagine that as I type this email, your parish is all eagerly waiting to hear some good news from you, and your pastor is assuring them that you are getting the job done, that you are getting them the rewards they deserve. Do you not want this to be true? I have no doubts that you do want this to happen, somewhere in your mind, but especially given your past actions I am hesitant to think that this desire will translate earnestly into your actions. As much as I want to believe that you will be firm in your determination, as much as I want to believe that these trials and tribulations you have gone through for all these months will not halt your progress, I still have a nagging suspicion that as soon as the going gets tough, you'll be on a bus coming back to Lagos with nothing but a bruised ego to bear. This would certainly be a terrible outcome. And as you address your parishioners on whatever day that may end up being, you will have nothing to say but how you failed. You could blame local transportation, potholes, armed robbers, or whatever you had to overcome to get back to where you stand then, but you know that all of these would be mere excuses. In that eventuality where you stand empty-handed in front of everyone, there will be no doubt that you have failed. You may ask what you should do then. But, I think the more important question would be to ask what we would do then, our church that has watched you grow and grow and grow only to fall flat on your face once given the opportunity. Do not think that our mercies would be granted to you under that circumstance. And why would we be merciful when all of our money and time is left to languish in a warehouse somewhere, nibbled upon by rats, all because you turned your tail and fled? That would spell the end of your happy little parish, and we do not want that. Do not think that with our hyperbolic threats, that we would somehow want you to return empty-handed so we could revel in your failure. We are kind and merciful, and we simply demand the best of you and what is best for your parish. And considering some of your prior violations of your responsibilities, that really seems like a reasonable demand. We do not mean to claim that you are a sinner or anything like that in your current state. We simply mean to claim that should you fail, deceit would be your name, and dishonesty is a sin before God. And if you have pledged to Him, may He help you thus, that you will do what is necessary for your flock and fail, then there is a special space in Hell carved out for you. There you may rot and be scourged while watching over and over again the moment where you sinned.

Think about that, I ask. I am not making this statement as the weighty opinion of everyone here. I am merely offering some advice, based off how I have watched you grow over the last few months, that may prove to be true in the coming days. I hope it is false. I know you have the capability to make this advice false. But the choice rests with you. The choice should be obvious.

Be blessed,
Nicodim

That should get their hopes up. It should be clear that Eze has no option but to retrieve the package, and if it was not implied clearly enough, I am sure that we can spell out for them that no package = no parish.

Posted: Mon Oct 01, 2018 8:25 pm

^^^ Muhahahaha! Poor Eze! Twisted Evil

Clearly, all the idiots that he left at home will never believe Eze did not take the money.
There will surely be some "bad" discussions, quarrels and doubts.
For us, it's a classic situation of win-win! Laughing

Posted: Mon Oct 01, 2018 9:48 pm

Birlic wrote:

Clearly, all the idiots that he left at home will never believe Eze did not take the money.
There will surely be some "bad" discussions, quarrels and doubts.

In the scammer world, as in many criminal sub-cultures, there is no such thing as an honest mistake, I'm sure of that.

Posted: Tue Oct 02, 2018 1:22 am

Congratulations here, too!

Posted: Tue Oct 02, 2018 4:11 am

Edit to add: seeing as sportbluecanyon can no longer edit the thread title, could a mod add something like (Safari #1) to the end of the thread title? Thanks!

Eze is confused and a bit worried, as expected:

Quote:

Dear Father Nicodim,
Having read through your mail, I write in response to same as courtesy demands. Father I am an African, a Nigerian and I know when an adage is pointing at certain directions.

After much argument about going out of Nigeria to pick up the package, I decided based on your insistence to move going by the advice of the children of God and our Lawyers.

It was smooth at the beginning and later on it turned out that they have a mechanical problem on the way. Yes that cannot be ruled out. But there's something that is keep me worried here and that is;

1. Some points in your mail which sound like a revelation. See below; (he quotes large chunks of my previous message; the exact text is not important, but I'm cutting it out because I'm lazy)
Now dear father from the reference points above, I want to be informed about anything you feel or think is going on because they spell a lot.

Secondly God is a Righteous Judge. From the beginning of my following the path of the Holy Lamb, I decided with all my heart with the belief that I will receive more grace to my striving for more righteousness.

This is not supposed to be more than a days journey but......
Father could be kind to shed more light on the points above in order to redirect my thoughts?

Shalom Ha'mashach!!

The parts of my email he quoted were the ones that suggested that even if the trip takes longer than expected, he has no alternative but to stay. I guess he wondered, as expected, if that meant I knew something that I should tell him. Of course, this is intentional; as I can explain this all as divine revelation, I can imply that Eze is being paranoid and he should simply be quiet and respect God's will. He may begin to disagree with this interpretation in the future, but this only supports that he is being punished for something. Who knows. I'm reading The Scarlet Letter right now, so I am a bit more inspired than usual to write long religious things. My response:

Quote:

Note: I am copying your pastor on this email because this will do him some good too to know what is happening.

I am sorry if I have made you assume some sort of malicious or dire intent with my message, as it was merely written in response to a mood which I felt at the moment. And, seeing as I am writing you another email in the dead of night (I am a light sleeper, especially when something gnaws at me like this), I feel as if I have a need to write something, but I do not know what. It often strikes us in the faith to write what we do, or preach what we do, at strange times. And in these strange times, we must wonder if we have a higher motive for what we are saying besides the whims of our own minds. I would like to think that He grants those of faith little pearls of wisdom, that which manifested in our preaching or writing appear to be portents of something mysterious and evil. Thus, looking out from my cell into the garden, with its plants all gloomy in the night, I think that perhaps He is sending me a sign of some sort. Certainly He is a righteous judge, but I think we all know from our own personal experience that His verdicts can be swift and sharp in their nature, and sometimes He shows us love in ways that we cannot comprehend with our levels of wisdom now. And that is where these little pearls of divine wisdom come in, for that is how we learn what He has planned for us. All of us are unique in our own way, and all of us are told our own things in our intimate thoughts that serve to guide us anon. We must not be afraid of these messages, for even when sad in import they serve to elevate us to a higher level. This process only demands some observation and self-reflection to be adequate, which as you grow in your age and faith you will prove to be quite adept at.

When I was roused from my light sleep (I have learned to only require a few hours to be satisfied, and often my clearest thoughts come at night when only a few of us are awake), I decided to take a walk around the grounds to clear my head and perhaps observe something which I may relay to you. This was even before I, in my lucidity, checked my email and saw your email, which I must admit clarified a lot of what I was thinking about! As I paced the grounds in the cool air, just cool enough to warm the mind without being bitterly cold, I mulled over what I had told you previously, and whether I was too strong in my words. But I did not think that what I said was too strong, because as I was writing my message the words were flowing as if they had some divine justification to them. That convinced me that somehow, even though I myself did not quite understand the full nuance of what I was saying, that I was right in some way. I do not believe in seeing the future beyond what miracles He grants to us, yet somehow I had that quaint feeling that something was being foreshadowed! I found this quite hard to reconcile, which of course is why I woke up and went for a walk to clear my head, as in my sleep I was busy with thoughts which overcame me. It is quite fascinating how in our dreams we mimic lucidity with such astonishing clarity that we seem to deem it fact. I digress.

The cloudy skies seemed to reflect my mind, as my own mental state was muddled compared to my earlier flash of brilliance. Aside from a few lamps scattered around, I only had my own memory to rely on as I walked my usual path. Up the stairs, down the stairs, past the Monument, through the garden, around and around until I returned to my starting position. A quite satisfying walk, and one that I would love to walk with you in November. And while staring at my feet, I felt as if I was retracing a path that I somehow did not know, yet could walk with such a familiarity I would have sworn that I had done it since I was a child. Exactly like what I was saying earlier about being asleep yet awake at the same time. Perhaps at that time just a short while ago I was walking through my thoughts, looking for some light that would guide me toward the Truth that He was attempting to reveal to me. But there was only silence. In all the paths that I retraced, I was still walking in circle after circle at such a frantic pace that I could find nothing new.

Then, I realized my mistake. I was attempting to find some way to clear the mists in my mind, but what I needed was to embrace the mists, for that is what He was trying to show me! How foolish was I to ignore what was plainly in front of me in search of something illusory that did not exist! When life provides a haze, we must not try to blow away the haze but instead explore it. We must embrace His lesson, that the path is not always clear. I think this may reflect on you, too, for judging by when you sent your last message you have been staying up late as well. Have you tried to wander the streets as well to clear your head? Perhaps pace about the room a bit. Observe every facet of every wall and see what you can uncover. I can guarantee that a revelation will come to your head at some point. Only a fool would take this to mean that a choir will descend from the heavens above and deliver what you are looking for on a gilded scroll. It is something simpler most of the time, a nagging thought that passes across your mind like a ship traveling uncharted waters. And when we are on this ship plowing full speed ahead toward the unknown, we sometimes forget to appreciate the water below. Endless ripples spreading in all directions, waves lapping toward shore, all inscrutable to our feeble eyes. When we stare at the endless expanses ahead, sometimes our mind imagines things that are not there, yet to our eyes seem fully tangible. Just as sailors long ago saw mermaids and krakens in tempestuous seas, we see mirages that deceive. Our mistake is not wondering about a deeper meaning behind these mirages, these flashes in our mind's eye. We see a kraken with tentacles flailing and take it as a bad dream, only to then go below deck and sip grog and play canasta, sing sea shanties and jauntily dance. What a terrible mistake! These mirages are omens that He wishes us to see, and all of us, even the unenlightened, see them; only the wise among us who have been granted but a piece of His will see them as messages.

So, let us do some analysis here of what I have seen in my nocturnal wanderings. The light of the church through my mental fog is simple to comprehend, once I realized that it was there: glory awaits us through an uncertain path. The rose bush blooming in the night: beauty is found in the darkest places, for He has put beauty in every little thing. The shadow of a fellow brother in the building, walking with candle and robe toward a study, perhaps: people do not deceive in their intent in times of uncertainty. A common thread remains here which you, claiming to see dire undercurrents in my messages, will see as well. All hope is present, just as it should. These signs are abundant around us, just like those fragrant flowers which remain buds in the night. We must be taken where He takes us, and as He takes our hand as we walk our dim paths, we must not walk astray. You ask me to shed some light on my previous musings, but I can only say that I am a lantern guiding your way through uncertain mists: you must remain headstrong in your pursuits as you wander for that elusive guidance you need. There is a reason for my warnings, even if I myself do not quite understand it. He has not shown that to us yet. But as you walk those winding and forking paths, one foot tremulous after the next, remain tall and alert as you proceed. Something wicked this way comes, and your faith shall be a shield to guide you. I will pray on your behalf, and I hope that I have shed some light on my thoughts.

Be blessed,
Nicodim

Assuming Eze reads all of that (I honestly have no doubt that he will), he should still be a bit confused, but at the very least he should be satisfied with my very vague explanation. As everything I know is God delivering His wisdom to me, if he says it's time for him to suffer in hell, then I guess it's just fate. I also hope that Francise sees my email too and wonders what on earth is happening with the package. Fun times lie ahead...

Posted: Tue Oct 02, 2018 6:12 am

^^^

Tuesday - THE SECOND DAY IN COTONOU

- Our idiots slept their first night in Cotonou Laughing

... if things go the way I want them, they will sleep in Cotonou even this night. Twisted Evil

Last night, very late - Rev. Eze wrote to manager Alwoodi:

Quote:

Yes my dear friend,
Everything is okay but God's grace. I am in a hotel now. We'll experience you feedback.
Thanks

PrinceAnthony

===

07.01 - Akwoodi, to Eze:

Quote:

Sabah'l Kheir, my brother! I am happy to hear that everything is okay with you and that you spent a good night in Cotonou. It's really a big city and, for some young people like you, it can be a remarkable experience.
Please send me a copy of the hotel receipt, a picture with you in front of the hotel and any other supporting documents you have (bus ticket, various receipts, etc.). I have already discussed this with my Seattle superiors and we will try to solve all your expenses during this stay here. Of course, accountants are like hyenas and claim to have copies of all your receipts.
In two hours I will contact my nephew Joojoo to check what is happening there and when he thinks he can get to Cotonou. He told me last night that the auto-workshop is running from 09.00-19.00, but the mechanic promised to come to work early.
As Salam Alaykum! Akwoodi

Today's a very simple day:
- The new radiator will reach Bohicon only at noon time.
- The mechanic will work 2-3 hours
- Joojoo will sit on a terrace with some locals and drink... obviously, in the afternoon, when the mechanic finishes the repairs, Joojoo will be too drunk to drive.
- The manager Akwoodi will apologize and promise to look for another available driver... obviously, he will not find him!
- It's late again and things are postponed for "tomorrow". Laughing

===

THE SLAP OF THE DAY!

07.54 - Father Elephterie wrote to ALL... Laughing

Quote:

Pastor Francis, Reverend PrinceAnthony,

According to this yesterday message, I want to believe that starting today everything will be ok and there will be no more syncope in our MUIE Lagos Parish's daily operation.
Electronic products are intended for MUIE Lagos Parish operation and will only be used for the purposes for which they were donated. They can not be resold or donated!
The amount of $ 40,000 (from the parcel) consists of:
- $25,000 - money destined exclusively for our local MUIE congregation, as financial aid from the mother-church,
- $15,000 - money for the Project Manager of the Cathedral - C.P.M. (Rev. PrinceAnthony is proposed to be). The money was donated by Brother Josephus as a private donation.

At this point, unfortunately, Rev. Prince Anthony CAN NOT occupy the BOA function (by default, it can not be either CPM), because it is not officially invested.
He has to make a last step, the Sacred Tattoo of the Lamb.

As such, the sum of $25,000 will be divided equally among all members of the parish. Pastor Francis, I want you to take care of this, and I want to see a nominal table with names and surnames + the signature of each parish believer. They must sign that they have received the money. You understand me?
The sum of $15,000 remains also at the disposal of Pastor Francis, until Rev. PrinceAnthony investment procedure as BOA will be finalized. After that, all the $15,000 will be made available to him for full possession.

This is our will and must be respected!
Father Elephterie

Well, I'd like to be a bite here at the meeting place between Eze and Francis. I'd like to see Francis's reaction when Eze says he has neither money nor electronic products. Muhahahaha! Laughing

===

08.10 - Rev. Idiot, to manager Akwoodi:

Quote:

A very beautiful morning to you my dear friend. How are you this beautiful morning?
Yes we're alright and thanks for caring about us.

We'll be waiting for the time they will be through and arrive here.
PrinceAnthony

- Akwoodi's answer:

Quote:

Salam brother! Thank you for your care! Alhamdulillah, I'm happy and I have a perfect family.
Wives love me and I'm trying to share it fairly. It is not easy to satisfy 3 women, but I try to be as impartial.
The Prophet says us "Take care of them equally, and let none be above the other!" You are married? How many wives you have in your care, through the grace of our Prophet?

I spoke now to Joojoo and is already on a terrace next to the mechanical workshop.
He is waiting there, with the driver and other locals, to come up with the new radiator.
He promised to keep me posted on the details and to tell you straight when he goes to you.
If you want, you can also get on the bus and go to Bohicon. Otherwise the minutes pass when you can talk to someone next to you.
After the car repair is complete, you can all come back to Seme border area.
Please, send me your picture at the hotel and your accomodation receipt.
Mash'Allah!
Akwoodi

===

08.53 - Joojoo sent a short info-text to our Rev. Idiot... yeap, everything is ready and all what's missing is the NEW radiator!
Who will be at the workshop only at noon time. Laughing

...
When Joojoo will be already too drunk to can drive the van Laughing

...
Wow, what a bad luck for our dear Reverend! Laughing

Quote:

GUD MORNIG AM HERE NA WORKSHUP AM WAITNIG FO DA CURIER WITH NEU RADIATUR .MECHNIC PROMIS MI REPAR 2 HORUS .AKWUD TEL MI TO LET U KNO WHN AM GO TO COTONU

===

10.01 - Manager Akwoodi wrote to our idiot... yes, everything is on the schedule.

Quote:

Salam my brother! The courier who brings the new radiator is on his way and will reach Bohicon in 45-50 minutes. Juju is already there and is waiting, along with the mechanic. The repair will take ~ 1.5 hours and then Joojoo will start directly to Cotonou. Please reconfirm the meeting place and send me the requested pictures in my previous message. I've already told Joojoo that he has to pay you some extra money, but I need the copies of those documents and a picture to confirm your presence at the hotel. Mash'Allah! Akwoodi

===

11.00 - Our dear Reverend wrote to Joojoo:

Quote:

Good morning my friend Joojoo,
I just read your letter now. What is the situation of the Van now? I pray you're safe.

PrinceAnthony

- The answer:

Quote:

MECHNIC WORKNG ON VAN RADIATUR .NEW RADITUR ARIVNG PROPR TIME AM AN RESTURNT WITD SOME BOYZ FO HERE .2 HORS AM GOENG TO COTONU .WHRE AR U NOU ?

===

11.14 - Our dear Reverend Eze wrote to Joojoo:

Quote:

Alright my friend. So are you on the way to Cotonou now? I am in the Stadium gate as we agreed yesterday.
Thanks

PrinceAnthony

12.46 - Eze, to Akwoodi:

Quote:

Greetings to you my brother Akwoodi,
How's your day going on? It's almost 1 pm and I want to know how we're getting to the close of the matter on ground.
I waiting for your response.

PrinceAnthony

13.00 - Manager Akwoodi, to Eze:

Quote:

Salam!
Let me check the situation and come back with details. Normally, if Joojoo is already on his way, then he can not answer the messages.
If you are already at the meeting place, please send him a picture for confirmation. Joojoo must be able to recognize you and see how you dress today. I'm sorry for all these delays.
You have still not sent me a copy of the hotel receipt nor the promised pictures. Please proceed accordingly in order to settle the cost of accommodation.
Mash'Allah! Akwoodi

===

13.18 - Manager Akwoodi, to Eze... yes, yes, everything will be ok! Laughing

Quote:

Salam brother! He does not answer the phone, so I suppose he's somewhere on the way and he's driving. Did you send him your fresh picture from the stadium, from today? I still have not gotten the materials that I have asked you: accomodation receipt + your photos of the hotel. Akwoodi

13.22 - Eze, to Akwoodi:

Quote:

This is the receipt of the hotel we slept last night.
As for the food, we did not eat in the hotel. We ate in one of the restaurants by the Stadium and they didn't have receipt to show.
Thanks a bunch for the brotherly love.

PrinceAnthony

The invoice is extremely relevant:
- there are 2 rooms!!!
- is cashed on the nam Onyekwebe C (one of the parish believers). Laughing

So, at least 4 idiots stay and wait for money in Cotonou, starting yesterday morning. Laughing

Baiting Guru Joined: 25 Jul 2017 Posts: 2107

If my math is correct, the 25,000 CFA is only $43 USD. I was hoping it broke the bank for these guys!
I found a video for the place.....

www.youtube.com/watch?v=xjG0uopjgcw[url][/url]

Since Benin has a VAT (18%), and it was not included in the receipt total, can the shipping company be party to an illegal "cash" deal? Tax evasion is not something a 5 star shipping company wishes to be a part of. Everything it does should be above board and legal......submitting this cash deal to the accountant might actually be grounds for non payment of this expense.

Posted: Tue Oct 02, 2018 1:31 pm

THE BAD NEWS! Laughing

14.25 - Manager Akwoodi wrote to Eze... well, Houston, we have a problem! Twisted Evil

Quote:

Brother, Salam alaykum!
1) We have an embarrassing situation but I have to bring it to your attention.
My nephew Joojoo is unable to drive because he drank all day long with some locals whom he met yesterday at the hotel.
I think he was also drugged, even though the hotel manager could not confirm that.
2) I am ashamed of him because he is my nephew and I am responsible for his deeds. He's sleeping now for I do not know how long.
I do not know what to say, but it's obvious he can not drive the company's van in his condition.
I'm now trying to find another available driver to send from Parakou directly to Bohicon.
3) I've already announced this unfortunate incident at our Headquarter and they told me to do whatever the customer desires.
So, I'm waiting for your decision and I will do whatever you want.
4) If you want to come here in Bohicon, you can take a taxi and tomorrow morning Juju will lead you back to the border.
5) If you still want to remain in Cotonou, then tomorrow morning Joojoo will start from the early hours of the day.
The journey to Cotonou takes 2-3 hours, so he can be there until noon. It is only your choice and I will respect it altogether.

On the othe hand, if you were there, just like I asked you on yesterday, then Joojoo would NOT have gotten drunk!
Brother Eze, let me say that all this misery is just your fault!
Because you preferred to stay in Cotonou in luxury instead of going to Bohicon to supervise delivery directly and personally.
With deep regrets, mash'Allah!
Akwoodi

- Theoretically, they should stay one more night in Cotonou... now, they can not return home empty-handed after they've lost nearly two days here. Right? Laughing

- Tomorrow morning, Joojoo heads to Cotonou... but, unusually, he opens the parcel and discovers the hidden money there. He steals the company's car and disappears with all the money! Laughing

===

One hour before my last message, brother Josephus wrote to our moron:

Quote:

2 Chronicles 6:7-8 Now it was in the heart of David my father to build a house for the name of the Lord, the God of Israel. But the Lord said to David my father, ‘Whereas it was in your heart to build a house for my name, you did well that it was in your heart.

1 Corinthians 14:33 For God is not a God of confusion but of peace. As in all the churches of the saints

Bishop Select Eze,
I am so very confused. At our last exchange, I thought we had made it clear and agreed that your #1 priority this passed weekend would be to fulfill your requirements for making your appointment to Bishop official, so that we could move on to cathedral business. Now I find out that you have taken a road trip to pick up a parcel for the Parish? I understand there was also some procedural issues with the previously conducted baptisms. And it was you that officiated them all?

I do not understand. What SHOULD have happened is that you SHOULD have properly baptized Rev Francis, and he AS LOCAL PASTOR should have attended to the ceremonies for his flock, while YOU worked on your duties as BISHOP.

And then that begs the question, as this is a PARISH courtesy parcel, it should once again be tended to by the local parish, not the Bishop.
This is simple organizational delegation.

So what SHOULD have happened, is that you SHOULD have completed your tasks to become officially named Bishop and we should be working on Cathedral business this week. Instead, you are doing the tasks of the local reverend and then have taken it upon yourself to take a road trip that should have been delegated?

Meanwhile you are STILL not officially appointed Bishop of Africa and my cathedral project manager is unavailable to handle cathedral business?

Please do explain you rationale here because I am oh so confused and oh so upset right now.

Brother Josephus

===

14.52 - Manager Akwoodi, one good news for our idiots! Laughing

Quote:

Brother, I have good news for you! I have identified a delivery-agent of our companny who is now in Cotonou and headed for Parakou. He will go through Bohicon and, of course, he can carry you there until you agree. Where are you now, so I can tell him your exact coordinates? Salam, Akwoodi

===

15.10 - Eze is angry, very angry. Laughing

Quote:

My dear friend Akwoodi,
In view of the the message that you sent to me now, every right thinking man will see the whole issue as if there's something underground.

Why would you think that I left Lagos Nigeria to suffer under the rain yesterday and stayed out in the sun with Prince David leaving his school and you call it a luxury?
By way of law, I am not supposed to be running after the package because your company has been paid to deliver directly to receiver's address.
I did not ask you to pay my hotel bills but you willingly obliged to do so. The story of your brother being drunk as an excuse for non performance does not speak well of your company which according to you people, is rated the Finest among the 5 Star Shipping Companies in the world.

From the legal point of views, my presence wouldn't have changed anything if I were to be there. As I write this message, many things run through my mind until you are able to erase my doubts, I continue to see it from the angle of my thoughts. PROVE ME WRONG!!! because action speaks louder than voice.

I wait for your response to enable me know if I am to report back to the overall Leader of the Church in Aberdeen and afterward fly back to Lagos today.

PrinceAnthony

- Akwoodi, to Eze:

Quote:

Salam, brother Eze!
It is a shame that I fully assume and do not hide it. Joojoo has filled our family with immense pain and a huge obligation now presses on me. He is young and he has not resisted temptation.
Did you get my previous message? Regarding the delivery agent who is now in Cotonou and who could take you in his car to Bohicon?
I will pay, as I have already determined yesterday, all your expenses. Please answer quickly, because my driver is hurrying to come his home in Parakou.
Mash'Allah!
Akwoodi

- Eze, answering to my previous message (see above):

Quote:

This is a civilised world. Going by the the way things have been going, it is becoming very clear that there is a security issues behind the screen.
If there's nothing to worry about, why can't the new delivery Agent bring it down from Bohicon to Cotonou. Why is it a must for me to go to even come to Cotonou to pick it up and you're compelling me to move to Bohicon? Why? Is there anything hidden somewhere? The hand writing is clear on the Wall!!

From the onset, the package was supposed to be delivered straight to Nigeria.
Well every bit of the communication from the beginning is Intelligence Department of the Nigerian security.
My Ambassador here knows that I am here waiting for my Edo brother.

PrinceAnthony

- Manager Akwoodi, to Eze... Maybe we can make idiots spend another wonderful night in Cotonou...

Quote:

Brother, Allah is great and we are so small!
Honestly, I regret everything that has happened and I just try to repair all the crap that my young nephew did today.
No, you do not have any reason to come to Bohicon if you do not want to. The parcel will arrive tomorrow morning in Cotonou, and can be taken over as was the original deal. No problem!
All I did was try a moral repair. And nothing else! I feel profoundly offended and did not think another Muslim beloved brother can talk to me this way.
Tomorrow morning at 11.00, the package will be in Cotonou and Joojoo will look for you by email.
Send him the address of your hotel for him to bring the parcel directly to you, at the hotel address. After that, it's only your problem with the parcel.

Mash'Allah!
Akwoodi

Posted: Tue Oct 02, 2018 2:19 pm

I received this optimistic message from him about 8 hours ago titled "A NEW DAY":

Quote:

Dear Father Nicodim,
Grace and peace be multiplied to you in Jesus Christ name.
In the grace of the Holy Lamb of God that was slain for our propitiation, I write to inform you that I seen a new day in Cotonou.

The hotel is good and the management nice to us. Thanks father for every bit of the encouragement from you that moved me from Lagos to Cotonou.

I will update you as we make progress.

Shalom!

Rev. Pince Anthony G Ezze

He seems unusually optimistic, but I guess a good night's sleep will do that to you. My response:

Quote:

That is great to hear. Please keep me informed.

Be blessed,
Nicodim

I am curious to see if he will hold out any longer to try and get the package. Based on what he sent me, he seems quite comfortable in his hotel. Too comfortable.

Posted: Tue Oct 02, 2018 4:39 pm

15.41 - Well, our moron sent the same "alarming" message to everyone: the church and the company. Laughing

Quote:

My dear friend Akwoodi,
In view of the the message that you sent to me now, every right thinking man will see the whole issue as if there's something underground.

Why would you think that I left Lagos Nigeria to suffer under the rain yesterday and stayed out in the sun with Prince David leaving his school and you call it a luxury? By way of law, I am not supposed to be running after the package because your company has been paid to deliver directly to receiver's address.
I did not ask you to pay my hotel bills but you willingly obliged to do so. The story of your brother being drunk as an excuse for non performance does not speak well of your company which according to you people, is rated the Finest among the 5 Star Shipping Companies in the world.

From the legal point of views, my presence wouldn't have changed anything if I were to be there. As I write this message, many things run through my mind until you are able to erase my doubts, I continue to see it from the angle of my thoughts. PROVE ME WRONG!!! because action speaks louder than voice.

I wait for your response to enable me know if I am to report back to the overall Leader of the Church in Aberdeen and afterward fly back to Lagos today.

PrinceAnthony

Father Josephus answered to Rev. Eze... a big slap.

Quote:

Bishop Select,

I am confused as to what this is all about? You continue to ignore the business that you and I are involved in and keep bringing things to me that I know nothing about or have no authority to do anything about? I have copied Father Elephterie here as HE HANDLES ALL THIS NEW PARISH BUSINESS, NOT ME. And You should not be involved in local parish business either. That is for Rev Francis. YOU are supposed to have completed your needful duties to be officially appointed Bishop of Africa and we are supposed to be working on Cathedral Business. Instead you are doing someone elses job.

You have the wrong priorities, the wrong focus and you keep bringing the wrong issues to the wrong people.

So I did a little research and after talking with the appropriate people, I do not understand what the problem is. The shipping company is apparently renegotiating their charter in Nigeria and their ability to deliver into Nigeria has been temporarily suspended. This was an unforseen issue that could not have been anticipated. As I understand it the shipping company has offered SEVERAL different alternatives to see this through, willing to bear all costs associated with same. So I do not understand what the issue is.
Their job is to get the parcel delivered. They have indicated they will be paying all expenses to do so, including any costs incurred. So once again I do not understand what the problem is nor do I understand why you are bringing the non existent problem to me.

My ONLY concern is my legacy, the Cathedral which is once again on hold progress wise because my cathedral project manager has not fulfilled his duties to be appointed Bishop and has taken it upon himself to take a road trip to work on getting a package that his local reverend should be attending to...

My Concern is my Cathedral Project Manager is AWOL in is not at his post where he should be attending to the things he should be attending to.

Father Elephterie I am sure will look into the non issue of the parcel delivery....as once again, as I understand it, the shipping company has been more than accommodating with regard to resolving.

Eze, to brother Josephus:

Quote:

Greetings to you sir,
Please I am sorry for the delay in responding to your letter.
I have been in Cotonou Benin Republic since 2 days now to pick up the package and it's been stories all along.
Please sir, I will fix everything tomorrow by His grace.

Thank you Sir.
Rev. PrinceAnthonyG.Eze

Brother Josephus, the 2nd slap:

Quote:

All concerned,

So as I understand it, while many of the items in this email still remain unaddressed, Now we have our Bishop Select doing Rev Francise job
Rev you have not gotten back to me either on the aforementioned items.
And now Bishop Select is on a road trip ?

Rev we need answers to the questions .... plain and simple......

There are apparently issues with the organization of our African Diocese and that is most concerning.

Reverend Francise, can you speak to the issues in the email below that was sent a week ago that directly concern you?

Please advise ASAP

Brother Josephus

===

16.30 - Brother Josephus, again... the slap #3:

Quote:

Bishop Select,

This is part of the problem. I do not understand why the Bishop Select of Africa and my supposed cathedral project manager is doing what the local reverend and his congregation should be dealing with.
This package is NOT the Bishop's responsibility. It is for the LOCAL PARISH.

Your priority this passed weekend was supposed to be to finish whatever you need to finish so that you could be officially appointed Bishop and we were supposed to be starting seriuous work on my legacy the Cathedral.

instead you take a road trip to pick up a package that is not even meant for you, but for the local reverend and his parish?

Meanwhile you are STILL not officially appointed Bishop of Africa...and the cathedral project remains dormant because of YOUR priorities being out of whak.

So now what is your plan to rectify all of this?

===

I do not know what decision our idiots made, because they did not respond to the latest messages written by Akwoodi.
I hope they will stay in Cotonou also this night. Laughing

===

17.53 - Directly from Niamey, manager Qesha answered to the "alarmistic" message of Eze:

Quote:

Sir Eze,
What is this message?
Akwudi does not answer to my phone calls and I have no information.
I do not understand anything!

Masha' Allah!
Qesha

Tomorrow is going to get involved in the story also the good customer care manager, Mr. Claude. Directly from Seattle.
Yeap!... a lot of people wants to help our poor Rev. Eze. Laughing

Posted: Tue Oct 02, 2018 7:56 pm

A NEW AND WONDERFUL NIGHT IN COTONOU! Laughing

20.34 - From our moron, to manager Akwoodi:

Quote:

Good evening my dear friend, just wanted to inform you that I am staying in one of my brother's house at Dan Tokpa because I didn't have money again for hotel bills.

I will be coming out to the stadium area tomorrow since you said that it will be sorted out by 11 am tomorrow.

Thanks.
PrinceAnthony

- It looks like he will sleep another night in Cotonou, so tomorrow will be the third day since he's waiting for the money pack. Laughing

- As I said earlier, tomorrow morning Joojoo heads to Cotonou... but, unusually, he opens the parcel and discovers the hidden money there.
- He steals the company's car and disappears with all the money! Laughing

===

21.38 - Rev. Eze wrote to "the good manager Qesha":

Quote:

Good evening and peace be multiplied to you my dear friend.
Sorry my reply came a bit late. Have you heard anything from Akwoodi?

Well I came into Cotonou as agreed and waited under the rain, later he told me that the Van carrying the package from Aberdeen ran over a goat and developed radiator problem.

After a long while, he told me that it will be delivered today as they couldn't fix it yesterday. As day break, after receiving one email from Joojoo, no other words from him.
He now asked me to come down to another town not minding my Pains. His excuse was that his brother was drunk and drugged at same time.

Where I am now is in somebody's house because I have spent all the money with me.

PrinceAnthony

21.58 - Directly from Niamey, manager Qesha wrote:

Quote:

Sir Eze, my coleague Akwoodi is an honest man and I guarantee for his moral integrity. No doubt, because I have known him for almost 20 years (we worked together at the beginning of our career).
Another situation is, unfortunately, with the rest of his family. My friend Akwoodi comes from a family of head hunters, from somewhere in northern Benin. They are very cruel and half-wild people, who still live in a primitive and very bloody society. I do not know who his brother is, that you tell me he drank and was drugged. I am surprised that Akwoodi has not used an official company driver. Perhaps everything is my fault, because I strongly insisted that he help you "as a true brother of Allah." What happened to the delivery when it's scheduled? Tesbah ala Kheir, Qesha

===

Posted: Tue Oct 02, 2018 9:56 pm

Birlic wrote:

- It looks like he will sleep another night in Cotonou, so tomorrow will be the third day since he's waiting for the money pack.
- As I said earlier, tomorrow morning Joojoo heads to Cotonou... but, unusually, he opens the parcel and discovers the hidden money there.
- He steals the company's car and disappears with all the money!

Will you be sending in the mercenaries again?

Posted: Wed Oct 03, 2018 3:56 am

^^^ Every time! Laughing

I'll need Cpt. Hydell's services also in the Linoline's story (with Musa, the gambian lad).
===

Wednesday - another beautiful day in Cotonou! - THE MORNING TIME

06.40 - Akwoodi responds to Eze's yesterday message ... of course, Akwoodi is mad and offended by the fact that Eze has claimed the company's services.
- The relationship between Akwoodi and Eze will never be "friendly"... as they have been so far. Laughing

- Joojoo (the driver) will have to arrive in Cotonou this afternoon. Of course, things will be complicated and funny ... Joojoo steals the money and disappears.
- But, let's not anticipate anything yet! Laughing

Quote:

Sabah'l Kheir, Mr. Prince_Anthony_G._Eze,
All the heavy words that you threw right in my face yesterday, have hurt me and made me to doubt your sincerity. I have never believed that a brother of Allah can treat me in such a way. Unjustified suspicions and serious unspoken accusations, all of which are not likely to create a long-lasting relationship between us. Starting today, we will focus on simple business-client relationship. I was also informed that you already made some complaints to the company's headquarters and this thing will seriously damage my career. I have a big family, which I can hardly financially sustain and the loss of my income is a tragedy for my brothers. In my family, such things are neither forgiven nor forgotten.

Joojoo will go to Cotonou today, in about 2 hours. I estimate he will reach the meeting area somewhere between 13: 00-14: 00.
I have given him directions to keep in touch with you, and you will have to tell him where you are and how many people are with you there. A confirmation's photo of your presence at the meeting place is mandatory and absolutely necessary. I have an important delivery today, so I do not think I can be online all day. I really hope that in the afternoon everything will be already solved and I hope things will end well.

Masha' Allah!
Akwoodi Osuaze

It is the 3rd morning when our idiots see sunrise in Benin!!! Twisted Evil

=== === === ===

Things get more funny. Laughing

- Rev. Idiot's trying to apologize to Akwoodi... too late! Twisted Evil

- The Customer Care Manager Claude (from the TSC headquarter) responds to yesterday's messages ... of course, some serious actions will be taken against Akwoodi. Laughing

Conclusion? Akwoodi will be fired and this will give rise to threats from the Akwoodi's "head-hunter" family. Woops, there will be some serious problems for Eze. Laughing

06.54 - Eze, to Akwoodi:

Quote:

Good morning my dear friend Akwoodi, I hope that your night was restful.
Well here we didn't sleep comfortably because of the nature of the place.
Now I want you to tell me exactly what we are going to do today.
I wanted to go back to Nigeria yesterday but because you said that the Van will deliver the parcel to me today, that's why I had to stay in someone's house.
So what do you advise me to do?
Thanks

PrinceAnthony

06.59 - Five minutes later, he sent another message:

Quote:

Well my friend,
Sorry anyway I didn't do anything with bad intentions. However I want you to put yourself in my shoes and think of how it hurts that a company was contracted to deliver a package to a particular destination for close to 2 months, nothing happened instead it was diverted and that's a breach contract in law.

I want to assure you that you are not going to lose your job and my relationship with your will definitely make you happy sometimes, someday.
You will get to know me better and I promise you that your family will live to thank God that you met me. I am not boasting but I am sure of what I am talking about.
I am sorry my brother.

PrinceAnthony

07.12 - From Seattle company's headquarter, manager Claude wrote to Eze:

Quote:

Dear client PrinceAnthony,

Yesterday, I received some worrying messages from you, but only today I was able to read my emails. My wife gave birth to our second child and I was free for a few days.

I understand that delivery has not yet been made and that you are dissatisfied with the services provided by our regional manager Osuaze's team?

Well, this will be brought to the attention of the Board, and I think President Wiloughby will take severe measures.

I assure you that our concern for customer satisfaction is a priority.

Thank you for your trust in our 5-Star Services.

Claude

===

07.31 - Joojoo wrote to Eze... yeap, the car is ready and Joojoo will go to Cotonou in about 1 hour. Of course, a new fresh photo will be useful. Laughing

Quote:

GUD MORNG THE VAN REDY AN AM GO COTONU 1 HOUR .AM GET THRE NOONTIM .WHRE IZ MITENG PLACE ?AM NEEID PICTUR YU AN YUR FRENDS .AKWUD IZ VERY VERY UPSED AN AM AFREID TU GO HOM AFTRWARD

07.50 - Eze, to Joojoo:

Quote:

Good morning my friend Juju,
Meeting place is Stade de'lamitie.
Please don't be afraid of anything I have taken care of the situation.

PrinceAnthony

- Five minutes later, Joojoo answered:

Quote:

WHEN AM DRIV VAN AM CANOT CHEK MESGES .SEND ME YUR PICTUR NA STADUM SO AM SEE YU DRESSD OK ?

===

In the meantime, our moron is scared of the possibility that Akwudi's head-hunter family will take it as a "target"... so, he write to Claude:

Quote:

Greetings to you Mr. Claude,
CONGRATULATIONS!! Thank God for the arrival of your new baby. The baby shall live to fulfill his destiny in life and make you proud.

I sincerely appreciate your concern over my plight. I will however plea for Mr. Osuaze, he's been a nice guy but his team caused the the whole mess.
Please I sincerely plead on his behalf. Forgive him please. I have already taken it as one of the things anybody can see in life. Remember; to err is human but to forgive is divine.
Thank you so much for your understanding and pardon granted to Osuaze.

PrinceAnthonyG.Eze

- Manager Claude explain all the potential consequences...

Quote:

Dear client PrinceAnthony,

You do not have to worry because I've already discussed with our manager Osuaze and he has confirmed that delivery will be done today.

He explained to me the whole situation and admitted he was guilty of everything that happened yesterday.

I warned him very seriously that he risks professional sanctions if he does not do his duty and if our clients are dissatisfied.

Please fill in and send a customer satisfaction questionnaire regarding only Benin team services. Just as you aready did for the Niger team.

Thank you for your trust in our 5-Star Services.

Claude

Today's Events:
- Our moron it's gonna wait all day long for the driver Joojoo to get to Cotonou.
- Joojoo discovers the money inside the parcel and steals the company's car ... it disappears.
- TSC Headquarter will take desperate measures: manager Akwoodi is fired and Benin TSC Branch is temporarily shut down for restructuring.
- Akwoodi's family (the head-hunters) will want to get revenge, so our idiot Eze will get severe death threats. Laughing

Posted: Wed Oct 03, 2018 7:52 am

THE CONFIRMATION OF THE 3rd SAFARI DAY!

08.40 - Manager Akwoodi, to Eze... some unspoken threats. Laughing

Quote:

Salam, Mr. PrinceAnthonyG.Eze,
According to the signal transmitted by the satellites monitoring the GPS signal sent by the parcel # 7UZGM2YKA9V4****, it is confirmed that the company's van already went to Cotonou. Please, be in direct contact with the driver and send him the confirmation photo from the meeting place. I was informed that my professional future in the company depends on your degree of satisfaction. I do not know what your relationship with the company leadership is, but the situation seems to be serious. Thank you for all of this mess, you've already ruined my day and probably will ruin my life with great ease. I saw yesterday how you are able to judge people only after minor appearances. In the name of the Prophet I say to you that my brothers are blood of my blood, and my family's motto is "The blood spilled requires another blood."

Mash'Allah!
Akwoodi

08.48 - Rev. Idiot has already reached the Stadium and is waiting there. Laughing

Quote:

We are at the Stadium de lamitie.

===

- Last night, our moron Eze wrote to brother Josephus:

Quote:

Good morning to you sir
It's 3 am here. In order to put the record straight, I write in the grace of the Holy Lamb of God who continually guides us.

Prior to my baptism which I passed through the needle's eye to fund the building of the Pyramid, bought the goat and everything required for it, you encouraged me to do it that you will personally include a stipend from your pocket for me. I struggled to do so.

Sir, before this said package was shipped, I was asked to choose where to go and pick them. I said that I will not leave Nigeria to another country to claim it and you later assured me that it will get to Lagos.
After nearly 2 months of moving the said package out Aberdeen, I was finally asked to go to Niamey, at point, frankly speaking every member became skeptical of what is going on but I still controlled the situation and they remained submissive because they have never seen me to be double sided in whatever I do.
There are good Lawyers, Journalists, businessmen and civil servants among the members that I am raising for MUIE in Nigeria.
If the instruments are truly safe with TSC, I was the one that chose what the church needs to move on. The said package was shipped in the name of Prince_of_DavidC.Eze with my name as the reference.
Sir your message as seen below has truly defined all my labour thus;
1. First of all it shows that my labour makes no meaning at all.

2. Looks as if I don't really know what I have been doing and also don't know what I have believed in.

3. Don't forget sir, that all the current members of the Holy Lamb family in Nigeria, I am the one gathering them as the Lord will.

I have been involved in church planting for more than 2 decades, a baby must learn how to crawl, stand up and walk before running. From all I have seen about the Holy Lamb church, it's only very few people that will be able to make it acceptable to Christians here in Nigeria. I am one of the few that can make it happen.

If you are saying that I am not relevant to the church anymore, let me know my stand now but posterity will hold us accountable for either the growth or failure of the Holy Lamb family in Nigeria. Heaven knows that I have been working with an open heart with the church and I been using whatever I have to move the church forward but all I see coming back to me is either blames or humiliations.

The calibre of Personalities I am going flood church with, will even surprise the Headquarters. I can't even speak with anyone on phone, twitter or Skype.
I rest my case in the hands of God the creator of heaven and earth who remains the righteous judge and before whom I stand blameless in following this church.

Put me through sir!!!

Shalom ha'mashach!!!

Rev.PrinceAnthonyG.Eze

===

09.20 - Our idiot begins to feel the fear ... tomorrow, after Joojoo steal the money and manager Akwoodi is fired, things will get worse. Akwoodi's brothers will ask for blood! Laughing

Quote:

My friend, I don't understand why you are threatening my life.
I have already spoken with Mr. Claude that he should be good to you and that you have been nice all along and you are threatening my life.
Why?

You what it means? Are you sending some of your boys after me?
I need an explanation of this.

- Akwoodi's answer... cold, polite but indifferent.

Quote:

Salam, Mr. PrinceAnthonyG.Eze! I can not afford to threaten a client of the company where I am employed. I just warned you that you made a big mistake yesterday, in all your appreciations at my address, as well as in all the messages you sent to my superiors. That's all I had to say. Nothing more! Now I have to leave the office and I'll be back in the afternoon. I wish you an excellent day! Stay in touch with Joojoo and tell him exactly where you want him to meet with you. He is the son of one of my brothers, and I'm trying to take care of him. I bear the responsibility of his deeds. Masha'Allah! Akwoodi

09.24 - Eze, to Akwoodi... I already can smell his fear. Laughing

Quote:

I have told you already that I am a friendly type of man and I know that all these dust will settle down and you will see what will make you thank God that we met.

I have already told Claude not to worry about it and that you have been nice.

Take care I will get back to you as soon as I see Joojoo.

09.31 - Joojoo made the first pause on his route ... because he does not know how to get to the stadium, he told to Eze that the new meeting place will be at the airport. Laughing

Quote:

AM STOP CAR PAUZ AT HOUGBO VILAJ . AM SERCHNG FO STADUM ADRESS NA FUOND NOTIN .BUT AM WEL WEL KNOU TO ARIVE AT COTONU AEROPORT BIG PARKING ENTRNCE TOURISTS .SEE THRE 1 GOUR OR 1 HOUR HALF OK? SEND MI YUR PICTUR THRE AM NOT RICIEV NOTIN FO YU UNTL NOW OK?

It would be a real pity for the idiot team not to visit the airport area, right? Laughing

===

09.53 - Reverend Eze is reluctant to leave the Stadium area, so he insists on Joojoo:

Quote:

Our picture Terrain kouhounou stade de l'amitie

10.11 - Another message from Eze, the same subject:

Quote:

Hi dear friend,
Our picture at Terrain kouhounou stade de l'amitie. Ask people to show you the road to this place.

If you take a bike to lead you to this place, I will pay him.

- Obviously, Joojoo is driving and can not check the messages.
===

10.33 - Joojoo made his 2nd pause on the route... in Abomey.

Quote:

ABOMEY STOP VAN PROGRM PAUZ 10 MIN .AM NOT KNOU STADUM AREA AN NO TRUSTIE ANYONUE .AM COMENG TO AEROPORT 40MINUTUES AM WAITNIG FO YUR PICTUR THEER PARKING ENTREE OK ?

What's next?
- Rev. Idiot Eze must arrive at the airport in 40 minutes and must send his "confirmation" picture from there. Laughing

- Joooo will become suspicious and will check the package ... woops, there are $40,000 and phones, laptops, camcorders, etc?
- Joojoo steals everything and disappears in the direction of Lome-Togo. Laughing

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10.38 - Rev. Idiot, to manager Akwoodi:

Quote:

Greetings to you my dear friend,
Please I am at the Stadium gate waiting for Joojoo. Kindly reach him I don't know what he's saying.
If he's not coming, let me know if I am to go back to Lagos any moment from now. Thanks.

PrinceAnthony

10.45 - Akwoodi explain everything... Eze have to go to the Airport, in the main entrance are. Laughing

Quote:

Salam! Joojoo said he does not know the Stade l'Amitie area at all and can not get there. But he knows very well to reach the International Airport in front of the main entrance where there is a large parking lot. He has been there a few times and that area is familiar to him. Just a few kilometers between the stadium and the airport, any local driver can take you there. He told you to wait in front of the airport entrance and send the required picture. It gets there in ~ 30 minutes. Mash'Allah! Akwoodi

Posted: Wed Oct 03, 2018 10:04 am

THE DOLLA-CHOP

11.01 - Joojoo checked the contents of the parcel and discovered the money ... trying to negotiate with Eze.

Quote:

AM LOOK UR PACKAG AN VERY VERY INTRESTD IN CONTENT OK .CAN WE MAK A DEAL AM BRING U PACKAG BUT SHOUD GET SOMTING FOR GOOD SERVIC PROVID TO U OK ?? AM WORK HARD FOR AKWUDII BUT MAK NOT A LOT OF PAY I TINK IT GUD IF U CAN HELP TOO OK ?? WE TALK NEST HOOR AM COMING TU YU .SEND YUR TDAY PICTUR NA AERPORT OK ??

11.12 - Eze, to Joojoo... he tries to stay calm and relaxed. The money is so close to him! Laughing

Quote:

My dear friend,.
I am a friendly and kind type of person. Tell any Keke to bring you to the kouhounou Stade de l'amitie I will pay him.

As for you, I will surely give you something good. I am waiting.
I have already send you my picture at the Stadium gate today.
The same cloth.

- Joojoo, stressed and scared of the value of the package (he discovered the money), he does not trust anyone. Laughing

Quote:

WANT TO CHANG METING PLEICE BICOS AM FRAID YU CAL POLIS .METING PLEICE IZ FRONT AEROPRT COTONOU . SE YU THER IN 30MIN SEND PICTUR. IF YU NO COME AM SELL ALL ELECTRONIC COMPUTAS AN PHONAS AN REST IN TOGO MARKT .AM FIND MONY HIIDEN INSID PARCL NA CAN NO GO HOME BAK

11.27 - 15 minutes later, Joojoo sent another message to our Reverend Idiot.
- Joojoo must look frightened and stressed ... he has just discovered he is carrying an impressive fortune, so it's not easy to resist the temptation. Right? Laughing

Quote:

AERPORT ENTRNCE .PICTUR .ALON. NO POLIS OK? AM HER HIIDN ON SMOL STRET

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11.34 - Rev. Idiot, to Joojoo:

Quote:

Anyway my friend, I have no business with the Police. I have the list of everything in the package and you will be treated well if you behave well.
Those things belong to the church take care of it.

- Joojoo:

Quote:

IZ FORBIDN TU TRANDSPORT MONY SO AM TOUGHT TEK AL 40 000DOLLA FO MI .YU CAN KIP COMPUTAS AN PHONAS OK .NO TAWK TU POLIS OR AKWDII OK??

- Rev. Idiot to manager Akwoodi... well, the theft becomes official Laughing

... Akwoodi is out of the office, so he'll see the message later.

Quote:

My dear friend Akwoodi,
Below is a message from your brother Joojuoo. How can he work that way? You know that this is not a healthy arrangements in a company as big as yours.
How do you think the headquarters will see it if they discover that Joojoo opened the package? It's just between me and you, tell him to come to the Stadium gate. I am waiting for him.

------
WANT TO CHANG METING PLEICE BICOS AM FRAID YU CAL POLIS .METING PLEICE IZ FRONT AEROPRT COTONOU . SE YU THER IN 30MIN SEND PICTUR. IF YU NO COME AM SELL ALL ELECTRONIC COMPUTAS AN PHONAS AN REST IN TOGO MARKT .AM FIND MONY HIIDEN INSID PARCL NA CAN NO GO HOME BAK

===

More & more fun with our moron. Laughing

- Rev. Eze, to Joojoo... try to involve the authority of the church:

Quote:

Money is for the organization my friend. I know what to do about it and you will be happy.
Please let's do it in a friendly way.

- Joojoo... he was not very impressed by Eze's words. Laughing

Quote:

AM NEAR AERPOR WHUER R YU ?AM IN NORD CORNR OF PARKNG HIDEN .SEND PICTUR IF YU WANT TU SEI MI OR AM GO TU TOGO .URGENT

- Ten minutes later, Eze:

Quote:

I am leaving the Stadium now coming to meet you..

- Joojoo:

Quote:

TEK PICTUR IN FRONT OF ARPORT OR AM DISAPEAR IN TOGO OK??

- Eze, in front of the airport entrance???... he send me an empty message, just this picture is attached.

12.02 - Joojoo, inflexible:

Quote:

WHAAT THIS PICTUR? YU STUPID ?AM WANT TO SII AEROPRT ENRTANCE BEHIND YU

- Reverend Idiot:

Quote:

I will soon be there

===

12.22 - Rev. Idiot, to Joojoo:

Quote:

I am at the Airport now wearing the same cloth

- Joojoo:

Quote:

FUCKNG PICTUR OF FOREGOT MI .YU MEIK ME CREWZY MUGUN

- Rev. Eze:

Quote:

At the Airport garage

- Joojoo:

Quote:

YES NA ARPORT GARAJ ENTRNCE .PICTUR OF YU AN ENTARNCE

- Eze, again:

Quote:

What is the meaning of all this?

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12.35 - Our moron, making complains to manager Akwoodi. Laughing

Quote:

My dear Akwoodi,
I'm at the Airport and Joojoo has not been seen. He keeps abusing me via emails.

12.39 - Eze, to Joojoo... he's trying to be smart. Laughing

Quote:

Please send me your own picture so that in case you can't find me, I will recognize you.

=== === === ===

12.47 - I really do not know why the idiot refuses to send me another trophy (his picture from the airport), but I think it's time for Joojoo to steal the money and disappear. Laughing

Quote:

MUGUN I SAW DAT YU ASKED FO MONI .YOURE STUPID YU TINK YOURE GONNA GET MONI WITHOUT MAI HEP , OK ?BICOS YU REFUSED FO WRK WIT MI , I CHOP ALL 40 000 DOLLA .AM SEE YU AN YU AR NOT ALON AN YU ARE GUYMEN WAHT CHURCH YU TAWK TU MI ??BI YU STUPID OR BI YU JUSS DI PIKIN ? AM GO TO TOGO BYE

12.58 - Eze's completely desperate... he don't want return home with nothing.

Quote:

Joojoo I am telling you the truth I will not do you anything.
Meet me and let us talk like man and friends.
You take some and give us some to transport the electronics.
I will not tell the headquarters of your company. I am begging you.

- Joojoo:

Quote:

AM NO SEE ANY PICTUR .YU ARE NO ALON .AM GO .GUDBY !

- Rev. Idiot, trying to negotiate with JooJoo. Laughing

Quote:

How much do you want? With all my heart, I will give you. Nobody will hear about it

- Joojoo, cold & inflexible:

Quote:

AM ALREDY ALL MONY AN ALL PRODUCTES

- Eze's really desperate:

Quote:

Please I am going to take another picture now and send to you please.

- JooJoo:

Quote:

AM NO SEE ANY PICTUR .YU WAST MI TIME

Posted: Wed Oct 03, 2018 11:53 am

I can't escape the feeling that Eze's shirt was once his mother's or his sister's frock.

Elite Baiter Joined: 28 Mar 2015 Posts: 1916

^^ his mama's old maternity smock. Laughing

Posted: Wed Oct 03, 2018 12:35 pm

^^^ Muhaahahha! Laughing

13.24 - Our morons, waiting near Cotonou International Airport.

Quote:

See

... another funny "negotiation" message:

Quote:

I promise you that I will not tell anybody about how much you are taking so long as you will give me back some with the properties

So let's make it a deal. You take some and give me back some.

13.30 - Eze, desperate:

Quote:

Where are you now? What do you want me to do now please?

But Joojoo has already gone to Togo, so he will respond to the messages only tomorrow... In a few hours, manager Akwoodi will return to the office and read the messages. Tomorrow will be also a very fun day:
- Joojoo will be declared missing... The TSC company will hire Cpt. Hydell's mercenaries.
- Akwoodi will be fired and the TSC Benin Branch will be disbanded ... Akwoodi becomes a bandit and poor Eze is threatened with death. Laughing

- manager of Niger (Qesha) will become Eze's first adviser, because he knows very well everything that's happening in "the area". Laughing

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13.45 - Our idiot reverend wrote to manager Akwoodi... still waiting in Airport area. Laughing

Quote:

Mr Akwoodi,
I have been here for almost 2 hours and taken some pictures and send to Joojoo, he said that he had already seen me yet could not come to meet me.

Now he has stopped communicating with me.
Please try and reach him to enable me know what to do.

Thanks

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14.01 - Just for fun... Joojoo wrote to Eze and proposed a meeting in which to share money and products... in Ouidah City, vest of Benin (on the Togo route). Laughing

Quote:

AM IN COCOCODJI TO TOGO ROUTE .AM NOT TRUST YU AM SEE YU NOT ALON AT AEROPRT .IF YU WANT TO SHARE MONI WITH ME WE MEET NA OUIDAH CITY THIS NIGHT .TOMORO MORNIG AM WIL GO TO LOME TOGO

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In the same time (14.08) our moron wrote to father Nektarie and brother Josephus:

Quote:

Dearest Fathers and brother Josephus,,
I write with Pains in my heart but with thanks to the Almighty God for making me to see another side of Christianity on earth.

Having spent 3 days in Benin Republic with my son PrinceDavid and some of the Parishioners to retrieve the package, the TSC driver asked me to move from where we agreed to meet and come to the Airport and I did just that.

While at the Airport, he kept telling me to take some pictures at the Airport garage and send to him, I did just that and finally I couldn't find him.
He started threatening me that he saw the money hidden in the electronics and that he will take it.

How hard I tried to bargain with him, he called me a stupid man, a mugu and etc.
What a humiliation! What a tragedy!
I wish I had listened and obeyed the divine direction I had received before now. What are we doing?

I have never seen this type of pain and shame since my 36 years in the Ministry.

PrinceAnthonyG.Eze

=== === === ===

Rev. Idiot Eze and his team went back home to Lagos.

14.08 - Eze, to manager Qesha and manager Akwoodi:

Quote:

I am on the way to Lagos after wasting my time for 3 days in Cotonou.
Your brother Joojoo said he's on the way to Lome with the load.

So, he clearly refused the meeting proposed by Joojoo. Laughing

- Qesha's answer:

Quote:

Salamu as Alaykum, Sir Eze! What happened there? Please explain!
What you say is very serious. My coleague Akwoodi, what he thinks about all this mishaps?
Masha' Allah!
Qesha

14.32 - Eze, to manager Qesha (Niger team):

Quote:

He has not said anything yet. I am going to inform the church in Aberdeen and to TSC headquarters.

I will forward all the messages the guy from Akwoodi to you later.

- My Niger manager Qesha, to Idiot Eze:

Quote:

Salam, Sir Eze!
Maybe Akwoodi is away to supervise any major transport. It often happens that managers are forced to accompany a high-value package (because customers are very important persons and do not want to be seen when they receive their values). Please give me a summary of the whole period, starting from the first day you arrived in Cotonou. I think it would have been useful to rent a car and go personally to their Parakou warehouse, but now it is too late to give advice.
I'm waiting for that summary as complete as possible.

Masha' Allah!
Qesha

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