F*ck Darla (NSFW) Emma takes it to the Nth!

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Posted: Thu May 02, 2019 8:27 pm

^^^ Thanks!

21.15 - Emma responds to the last message of Danyboi:

Quote:

I didn't say that. Why are you teaching my words the wrong way? Where is Seme?

- The idiot has not yet written anything about where he would like to meet with the driver. Laughing

- Starting Monday (when Linoline returns from vacation) we will be able to start the next part of our little story: The Trip #2 - Safari in Benin. Twisted Evil

===

Later, Danyboi writes to Emma:

Quote:

Close to Nigeria

Posted: Fri May 03, 2019 10:13 am

Friday

11.10 - Directly from his desk, the Benin manager writes to Danyboi:

Quote:

Hello sir,
My name is Akwoodi Osuazee and I'm Regional Manager of the Benin TSC Branch.
I found on my desk a short information about your special situation as well as a few messages from the company headquarters.
I was away from the country on my vacation and my official working program starts only on Monday.
We will discuss all positive ways to solve your problem (I also see here something about a financial reward) starting next week.
The messages I received from my colleague (Mr. Claude Postumierre) say that you are a Nigerian with residence somewhere in the Lagos region.
I suppose you will want your parcel to be delivered in the proximity of the Cotonou area / adjacent to the border.
If you are familiar with the area, we will establish a convenient meeting point for you. If not, then we will discuss all the details together.
I wish you a very nice weekend!
Akwoodi

Half an hour later, our idiot write to Akwoodi:

Quote:

Good day sir nice meeting you,I would like to us to meet at a point in seme border where is ok to get there is ok for me and I would like to meet Monday or tuesday.

===

Of course, the manager Akwoodi no longer checks his personal messages until Monday morning.
I know for sure that our poor Danyboi will have a frenetic weekend. Laughing

===

14.10 - Just to make him happy over the weekend days, Claude wrote to our lad:

Quote:

Dear Danyboi,

It seems like the local manager in Benin has come home from his vacation (because he answered today to my previous messages). I hope everything can be resolved as soon as possible next week. Of course, I have sent it precise and accurate information about all issues with your parcel delivery, including that 3,000 USD Financial Reward. The subsidiary led by manager Akwoodi has excellent Customer Satisfaction ratings, so I'm sure you'll be fully satisfied. As you really deserve!

Thank you for using TSC, the best in 5-Star Customer Service!
Claude

Posted: Fri May 03, 2019 6:24 pm

Birlic, tell the scammer not to carry any money on his travel, because you will sort it out once he meets your top people

Posted: Fri May 03, 2019 6:42 pm

That would be cruel. I like it. Laughing

Emma to Danni

Quote:

Nigeria is big, so I still don't know where it is. Can you explain please?

ETA
Danni to Emma. Apparently he already forgot that Emma has a really crappy internet connection and Google maps won't load.

Quote:

Just type Lagos to seme border in google map you will see it

Posted: Sat May 04, 2019 3:41 pm

Hitty wrote:

Birlic, tell the scammer not to carry any money on his travel, because you will sort it out once he meets your top people

Our plans include at least one night in Benin, so I can promise that things will be at least interesting. Laughing

===

Saturday - 16.00 - Our idiot wrote to my Customer Care Manager Claude, asking for a place to meet:

Quote:

Hello mister I saw your massage he has mail me as well... But am still searching fr our meeting like guest house but which to found the closer place to seme border don't know if you have an idea where will be close to seme border.

My manager Claude:

Quote:

Dear Danynoi,

Ohh, it's great news that manager Akwoodi has already contacted you, because my message to him was very clear. I asked him to do everything humanly possible to solve your problem better and more conveniently. Certainly he will ask for good information from our drivers who are responsible for the southern area of Benin. These people know very well all the places there in area and can make very good recommendations.

It would be good if you write a message to Akwoodi and ask him to look for a meeting place as convenient as possible and closer to the border. I believe that a public place (one restaurant, or parking, hotel, public market, etc.) would be in line with the purpose.

Please tell me if you go alone, or will you be accompanied by the same friend Toseen Isac? Obvious reasons, related to package security rules, forbid our drivers to get in touch with strangers, so the driver who will meet you will have to know exactly who "meets" with.

Cheers,
Claude

I have already studied the map and chose the meeting place:

- hotel 241 (Seme) - in Benin
- is relatively close to the crossing border point (12 km)
- there is a restaurant / barbeque,
- air conditioning and WiFi,
- a large car parking area in front of the hotel.

I'm sure the idiot will accept this place of meeting... of course we recommend that he stay there, to drink & eat and to take advantage of all the facilities in the hotel. Laughing

The hotel has many pictures on the internet, so the place will be easy to recognize... the idiot will have to send his personal photo out there, obviously. For "biometric identification". Laughing

===

LOL!!!
As I have predicted, the idiot is so easy to handle... he will ask for Akwoodi to set up his meeting place. Twisted Evil

Danyboi to Claude:

Quote:

Ok I had you and I will email him as well to get the closet place of near seme border and am going with the same friend...

Danyboi to Akwoodi:

Quote:

Hello sir I want you to help me with the closet place near seme border where we can meet

===

16.40 - Claude to our idiot... sure, everything will be fine. No doubt! Laughing

Quote:

Dear Danyboi, ok, it's perfect!
I will also write a message to my colleague Akwoodi, confirming that two people will come to the meeting (you and your friend) and asking him to choose the most convenient meeting place. Probably Akwoodi will read the messages on Monday morning (then officially begins his work schedule).

Cheers,
Claude

Our traveler boy, very happy and very confident in his success. Laughing

Quote:

Ok thanks

Posted: Sun May 05, 2019 6:22 pm

Birlic, I feel like going on a safari, great hotel with food and drinks, but tell the scammer to hire at least 3 prostitute for the night, your company driver will cover the cost for the entertainment expense when he meets him and need to see the ladies in the morning for proof.

Posted: Sun May 05, 2019 8:16 pm

back on facebook, but not much yet. I'll post when things start to get interesting. Need to do some bingewatching now. Laughing

Posted: Mon May 06, 2019 5:32 am

Monday

On Saturday, our idiot wrote to Akwoodi (manager in Benin):

Quote:

Hello sir I want you to help me with the closet place near seme border where we can meet

06.30 - So, very early in this morning, my manager Akwoodi (chief of TSC Benin branch) responds:

Quote:

Good morning sir, I understand your concern.
I'll try to find out something from my people who work there, in that area.
Since we are talking about delivering a high-value parcel, I would like to see the meeting in a somewhat safe place.
I mean, NOT directly on the street and, in any case, NOT in an isolated area! I'll come back to you with some arrangements details.
I wish you a very nice day!
Akwoodi

Later, I will return to him with the promised details Laughing

... our intention is to manage to "accommodate" Danyboi at that hotel in Benin (Hotel 241) and let him wait there for as long as he can. Laughing

===

09.15 - Manager Akwoodi to Danyboi:

Quote:

Dear sir, I have asked for precise information from our drivers (the agents that delivering parcels in Cotonou).
So, as soon as you cross the border (just 10-12 minutes away, at the first roundabout of the main road), is the well-known Hotel 241 Seme.
It is a 3 floor building, on the left side of the road and with a large parking area in front. In the evening, the hotel is extremely well signposted bright with neon lights.
If you come with a car and if you use navigation programs, then these are the coordinates: 7rue OKOUN SEME PLAGE, Benin (phone number: +229 67 70 40 50).
If you cross the border in a pedestrian way, then it is enough to ask one of the many bikers there (that moped drivers) to take you to the meeting place. It will cost almost nothing.
Hotel 241 Seme is an excellent location with air conditioning, barbeque and free WiFi. Prices are excellent and can eat very well. Many of my drivers frequently stop there on their daily routes.
Mr. Claude has asked me to allocate you a driver who speaks English too, so I will do all the necessary steps in this regard. I'm probably gonna send one driver named Joojoo (he's also my favorite nephew).

Because your identification procedure is based on the biometric profile, it is absolutely essential that you send (both me and the driver) some pictures of you, made right there in front of the hotel.
My delivery driver will recognize the hotel area and he will see how you look and how you are dressed. Take into account the need for a functional smartphone so you can keep in touch with my driver all day long.
Our vans are white colour, with the company names written on their both sides. Our drivers send their exact position at regular intervals (at each 60 minutes), so we always know where our cars are.
Depending on the time you expect to arrive at the meeting place, you will receive the necessary information directly from the delivery driver.
You will receive the parcel (#***5REMVTVFMO***) and an sealed envelope containing a sum of $3,000.
Please check the total amount of money in the presence of my driver, because any subsequent claim will not be considered.
You will also need to sign an internal document (which the driver will have already printed) attesting that your parcel was delivered in excellent condition.

Please tell me exactly the day you want to receive the parcel and please tell me exactly the time you can get to the meeting place.
My driver will come to you as soon as he finishes the remaining deliveries that he has to do in Cotonou. Warning! Delivery will not be done unless you send those pictures from there in front of the hotel.
Because of Nigerian law, our delivery-vans are not allowed to officially enter in Nigeria, so please do not try to bribe my nephew in this regard. OK?
After you receive the parcel, transporting it to your home is only your problem and my driver can not be involved. I hope you understand this.
Please tell me if everything is okay with the proposed meeting place. I expect from you a clear message with the exact date and time when you will be present at the meeting place.
Have a nice day!
Akwoodi

Wannabe Baiter Joined: 28 Oct 2018 Posts: 90

Oh no, not Joojoo!!

Posted: Mon May 06, 2019 2:50 pm

^^^ Ohh, yes! Joojoo will be present again. Laughing

14.38 - Danyboi to my manager Akwoodi:

Quote:

We get there by 12:00 tomorrow and I hope we will meet at this point

15.13 - My manager Akwoodi:

Quote:

Dear sir,
So, tomorrow, will you be there (at Hotel 241 in Seme) starting at 12.00? Have you checked the bus timetable in your area and are you sure you'll be there at that time? I ask you very seriously, because I need to have a firm and precise confirmation that tomorrow you will be present at the meeting point.

The package is now in our warehouse in Parakou, 6 hours away from Cotonou and the driver who brings it needs to be sure that you will be present at the meeting. My nephew Joojoo (the van driver) will be assigned to meet with you at Hotel 241 in Seme. I hope you will get there in good time.
Joojoo will leave Parakou in the morning and he will report his position every 60 minutes.

When you get to the meeting point, I'll need those photos. I hope you understand that Joojoo does not release the package unless you do the correct identification.
Have a nice day!
Akwoodi

It looks like tomorrow will be a fun day. Laughing

===

Posted: Mon May 06, 2019 3:13 pm

Posted: Mon May 06, 2019 4:42 pm

Obviously, we will need another set of his "biometric photos", right? Laughing

17.35 - Claude to our moron:

Quote:

Dear Daniel,

My colleague Akwoodi has sent me the information that you have settled delivery for tomorrow and that you have decided together on the meeting place. This is true? I am very glad that everything will work out well, finally.
Please do not forget that biometric identification is a process that lasts at least 100-120 minutes, so I will need you to send me those photos (made at the meeting place) before the driver comes to you. The recognition program will analyze your tomorrow's photos and compare them to those previously sent, so your biometric profile will be confirmed.

What is the time you reach the meeting place? Akwoodi has not given me too many details.

Cheers,
Claude

===

Our little idiot is scared of the idea that he have to undress in panties and make those biometric pictures there in Benin. He wrote to Claude: Laughing

Quote:

I don't get what photo again,is it not the one I will take at the hotel for him to recognise me what is it

and

Quote:

You should talk now cos am not doing any demn photos apart from the one to recognise me what kind of thing is that and don't waste my time

And, to Akwoodi:

Quote:

There's something I need to confirm from Claude until he sort it out befr I can tell you when am coming what he's saying now is not in my a gender which i can't do again the ones I make befr is in his system why is he requesting fr another for what reason they all know what happened to my last trip I make those biometric photos I don't get what I want a last let him use that cos am not interested in making any than to make u recognise me

===

20.10 - Two hours later, Akwoodi responds... innocent 100%. Laughing

Quote:

Dear sir,
I do not understand what you are talking about and whether tomorrow the meeting is taking place, or if you want to change your plan.
Since you do not have valid IDs (passport or ID card), I understand that you have chosen the biometric identification procedure and then that requires a new set of photos. Made in the same positions. The computer analyzes both sets of pictures and determines if it is the same person. Honestly, I do not understand what the problem is.

Everything I want from you is to confirm that tomorrow at 12.00 you will be present at the meeting place. The confirmation has to come up tomorrow morning, so Juju knows if to take your parcel in the van that will come to Cotonou.
Have a nice evening!
Akwoodi

===

20.20 - More fun with Danyboi. He wrote to Akwoodi and confirmed his presence, tomorrow, in Benin. Laughing

Quote:

That hotel 241 is not too far from the market square right to avoid interruption I don't want any force problem like my last trip....any way I understand tomorrow by 12:00 I will be there.and make sure your driver arrived on time

Akwoodi:

Quote:

I'm trying to catch Claude on the sat-phone.
We have to solve the problem of biometric authentication and I have an idea.
We'll see if they can get approval.
I will come back to you immediately.
Akwoodi

20.35 - 15 minutes later, Akwoodi writes again to Danyboi... good news, only good news! Laughing

Quote:

Dear sir,
I managed to talk to Clyde and understand the nature of the dilemma. Good Lord, everything is solved now!
We've got a special waiver, just for you: You can take those pictures for biometric identification tomorrow morning before going to Seme.
Send them to Clyde and then get in the bus. Until you reach the meeting place, the biometric profiling process will already be completed.
When you get to the hotel, you only have to send to Juju a picture of you and the other person who is with you (Claude told me that you would be accompanied by a friend).
So everything is solved:
- tomorrow morning, send Claude those photos needed for biometric identification
- then, get on the bus and make sure you get to the meeting place at the scheduled time.
OK?
Have a nice evening!
Akwoodi

Posted: Tue May 07, 2019 4:24 am

Yesterday, very late in the night... Danyboi wrote to Akwoodi (Benin manager).
- regarding the biometric photos:

Quote:

If I send to you,you will send to him as well

- he want to talk with Claude (by phone):

Quote:

Like you send me the number

- regarding the hotel phone number:

Quote:

Whose number is that

===

Tuesday

Theoretically, today is a new Safari Day! Laughing

05.40 - Manager Akwoodi to our idiot... everything is good. Twisted Evil

Quote:

Dear sir, my nephew Joojoo (your driver) prepares now to go to Cotonou.
He took your parcel as well and will come to Hotel 241 in Seme only after finalizing the rest of the deliveries that are scheduled today in Cotonou.
His email address is: < snipped >
Joojoo understands English a little bit and he can communicate with you.
Do not forget to send your new biometric photos (before you leave home) and remember that Joojoo needs to know when you arrived at the Hotel241 and that you need to send a picture of yourself and your friend, in front of the hotel.
Have a nice day!
Akwoodi

===

I will prepare a short series of messages that will be sent by Joojoo to Danyboi, at each stop... I am convinced that our idiot will not really study the map, but all the messages will create "a reality of the fact" that the driver left Parakou to Cotonou.
===

06.43 - Danyboi to Akwoodi:

Quote:

What time will he be back and will he make it to that meeting time good morning

Akwoodi, very polite and amable:

Quote:

Dear sir, my nephew Joojoo is already gone on his way for nearly 40 minutes, probably soon he will send us the first confirmation message.
Theoretically, there are 6 hours from Parakou to Cotonou, and then there will be a number of 7 other parcels in his van.
Afterwards, it comes directly to you (from Cotonou to Seme are less than 30 km). No more than 30 minutes.
I appreciate he will be able to be present at the Hotel241 - hotel parking lot - at 2pm today.
Maybe sooner, maybe later, everything depends on local traffic conditions.
If you arrive early, you can go into the restaurant and order something to eat, until Joojoo arrives there.
He has been given instructions to pay all your expense today.
Please do not forget the photos and I ask you to count the money in the envelope ($3,000) in the presence of Joojoo to confirm that everything is okay.
If you will be there with your friend, then he must also appear in the pictures you sent, otherwise Joojoo will not allow your access to the van.
These are the company's safety rules and we are compelled to respect them!
Have a nice day!
Akwoodi

07.00 - Danyboi to Akwoodi:

Quote:

We will be there and make picture and I will mail him as well

===

07.25 - This moron sent to Claude exactly the same set of photos from April 18th.
07.39 - He wrote to Joojoo:

Quote:

Good morning

07.48 - Manager Akwoodi wrote to Joojoo (Danyboi is in CC):

Quote:

Joojoo, s'il vous plaît communiquer en anglais et mettre Monsieur Daniel dans CC.
(Joojoo, please communicate in English and put Mr. Daniel in CarbonCopy.)

Dear sir,
As you can see, my nephew has already made the first stop in the small village of Tchaourou and tells us what the situation is and where he arrived at that moment.
This will happen every 60-70 minutes, so you will know the position of the package with great precision.

I'm going to the north of Benin today, because I'm forced to assure the army escort for a HVC parcel containing many jewels that an rich American customer bought for his african mistress.
The north area may not have a good network coverage, so we may not be able to communicate for a few hours.
That's why I insisted that you communicate with Juju directly.
Do not forget about photos because they are extremely important in the success of delivery.

Have a nice day!
Akwoodi

07.52 - The driver starts and sends his exact position at somewhat regular time intervals...so, Joojoo writes to Danyboi:

Quote:

BOS AM OK IN THCAORUOU TO OUGUOI RODA

09.01 - Joojoo to Danyboi:

Quote:

STOP A OUOGUI NO PRBLEM

10.00 - Joojoo to Danyboi:

Quote:

AM ON DASA ZUME ALL OK
UNA DRIVR WHU CAM FO SETO TOLD MI ROUD IZ CROWD AN TRAFIC HAVY

===
In the same time, our idiot sent this message to Joojoo:

Quote:

OK Sir am on my way now to seme border

===

Unfortunately, Joojoo had a car accident and hit some goats that crossed the road Laughing

... but no, it's nothing serious. Yet! Laughing

Quote:

SETO NOW I HAD INCIDNT WIT GOAT CROSS DA ROUD AN NOT COULD AVOID
AM HIT GOAT HARD AM KILL HER AM PAID OWNR OF GOAT
HAVY TRAFIC MANY GOAT AN CHIKEN ON ROUD

===

10.52 - Our moron sent two messages to Joojoo:

Quote:

Alright then we are on our way now

and

Quote:

And we will meet at hotel 241 as you say ok

===

Few minutes later, my driver confirm he's on his way to Bohicon...

Quote:

AM OK ON MA WEY TO BOHICON
SOM DAMAJES TO VAN NO SEVER PROBLM

I am very convinced that these idiots (Danyboi and his brother) are not looking at the map and can not appreciate the distances... but maybe they will study these messages in the next few days, and then I tried to create the appearance of a " real routes ". Laughing

===

11.05 - Innocent 100%, my manager Akwoodi writes to Danyboi:

Quote:

Dear sir,
I have now reached an area where the network has coverage and we can communicate,
I did not get anything from you and I do not know what the current situation is.
Please confirm your current position as well as Joojoo's position. Have you reached Hotel241?
Did you send those new biometric photos to Clyde? Do not forget the photos for Joojoo in front of the hotel. OK?
Have a nice day!
Akwoodi

===

More fun with our moron...
It seems the two fools are somewhere on their way to that hotel in Benin.
Where exactly they are now, it's hard to say, because our idiot is not able to provide any accurate information.

11.17 - Danyboi to Joojoo:

Quote:

How long will it takes you back

11.22 - Danyboi to my manager Akwoodi:

Quote:

Hello sir am on my way now to seme and when I get there I will send you the photo of me and my second and pls let your nephew don't delay us cos of our trip back to lagosl

11.53 - Joojoo to Danyboi:

Quote:

AM HAV BROKN RADIATEOR AN BARLY MANAJE TU GET TU BOHICON
AM LOST WATER FO ENGINE AN GO SLOWY SLOWY AN MEEK MANI PAUZ TU COOL ENGIN
NO AM A CAR ATELER AN MECANIC TEL MI DA PROBLM WAS GOAT ACCIDNT AN REPARS TEEK MEYBE 2 HOORS LONG

11.57 - Our lad is panicked. Laughing

Quote:

Are you kidding me what time will you be back,we re close to seme border and what are you telling me

and

Quote:

How long now I don't understand you car breke down pls you have to do this snabby and fast

12.05 - Joojoo to our moron:

Quote:

VAN REPAR IZ 1-2 HOOURES LONG
AM WIL COM TU DA HOTEL 241 AFTA REPARATION
WAITNIG MI DHERE AN SEND MI YUR PHOTOGRPHYES OK

===

Danyboi to Akwoodi:

Quote:

Pls make me understand your nephew I don't know why he's given me an excuse by now he should be on his way back to hotel 241 pls talk to him

===

12.10 - Danyboi to Joojoo:

Quote:

OK I will

===

12.38 - Manager Akwoodi responds to Danyboi:

Quote:

Dear sir,
It looks like our company van has a technical problem to be solved.
Joojoo is now at a workshop in Bohicon (a town near Cotonou) and wait for auto mechanics to replace the piece that broke in the goats accident.
Please tell me where are you now. Have you reached the meeting place?
I have not received anything from you, no confirmation or photos.
Have a nice day!
Akwoodi

Posted: Tue May 07, 2019 11:47 am

I could make a transcript of the chat since I returned, but honestly, it's almost nothing and too boring to make the effort. Danni didn't say a word to Emma about his trip to Seme. Emma will assume he is working today, but be very angry with him for not telling her when he comes complaining. And of course Emma will try to convince him to stay the night in the hotel. Laughing

Posted: Tue May 07, 2019 11:58 am

^^^ LOL!

- If it is to consider the past episode (when the two idiots took a bus in the wrong direction), then I do not know what to believe.
- Danyboi is silent and does not communicate with my characters.
- I think he is now in Benin, but he can not write messages because he did not understand that he needs a new valid phone SIM card. Laughing

===

13.05 - Hmm, I do not know what to say... Danyboi to Joojoo:

Quote:

Hello I never get the place

Danyboi to Akwoodi:

Quote:

Am at seme border

13.15 - Ten minutes later, Akwoodi responds:

Quote:

Perfect, I'm so glad to hear this. Probably soon my nephew Joojoo will get to the meeting place, there at Hotel 241.
Did you send him those required picture, with you and your friend, so that Joojoo can easily recognize you?
Have a nice day!
Akwoodi

===

13.38 - Joojoo writes to our boy:

Quote:

MISTA DANEEL UHERE AAR YU ?
AM NO SEE YU NA AM NO PICTUR FO YU

Posted: Tue May 07, 2019 1:12 pm

Well, we have managed to get another Safari! Laughing

13.57 - Danyboi to Akwoodi:

Quote:

Am in the hotel 241 now. Waiting for him now

and, to Joojoo:

Quote:

Am right in the hotel,where are you

14.04 - My manager Akwoodi writes to our idiot:

Quote:

Dear sir,
It's perfect! I'm going right now to get in touch with him to check out his last position.
Please go outside of the building and take a picture of yourself in front of the hotel.
You can order something to eat until Joojoo arrives there. I'll get him to pay all the expenses out there.
Have a nice day!
Akwoodi

===

14.20 - Danyboi to Joojoo:

Quote:

Hello where are you and how long will it takes for you to be here.

===

14.25 - Akwoodi:

Quote:

Dear sir,
It looks like the van radiator is cracked (due the impact with that goat) and now the mechanics are trying to weld it.
Joojoo was very nervous and said that after the car's repair was over, he would come directly to you (he would not give up the today's shipments in Cotonou).
So, please wait there. Any kind of expense will be settled by the company when Juju will meet with you.
I apologize for this little inconvenience and wish to reward your patience with a bottle of champagne or expensive wine.
Please order at the restaurant the best food and the best drink there! I will be happy to ask Joojoo to pay the entire bill.
Have a nice day!
Akwoodi

===

Posted: Tue May 07, 2019 1:32 pm

I'm looking on Google maps, it appears that there are two Hotel 241's in the area:

https://www.google.com/maps/search/+hotel+241+/@6.4134802,2.3279067,10.75z

Perhaps there is some confusion? After all, Danyboi isn't the brightest banana in the bunch...and of course it's always the lad's fault...

Posted: Tue May 07, 2019 1:43 pm

^^^ LOL!

We have this new Safari confirmed!

14.33 - Our boy wrote to Akwudi... he also sent me one "outside" photo.

Quote:

OK pls let me know time is not on my side.....my place is far...

That picture corresponds to the pictures of the hotel (on the net).

===

14.45 - Joojoo writes to our boy:

Quote:

AM STILL NOR SABI ANYTHIN DI MECHANIC WORKIN ON DI MOTO DON DISMANTLED ALL OF DI FRONT
DI MECHANIC SAY WON HOUR BUT HIE DEY NATIN CERTEN
AM DEY AT DI UNA NEARBY TERRAS AM TOOK SOME CHEECKEN WIT RICE NA DI COLD BEER
AM WIL COME TO YU QUICK QUICK AFTA REPARATIOON

Danyboi:

Quote:

How long will it takes now,you know my place is far and I have to go back on time

and

Quote:

Please be worried about me and where I come from pls tell him to work it fast

Posted: Tue May 07, 2019 1:52 pm

And I'm still sitting here watching the show. Waiting for the panic to set in and chew him out for not telling Emma where he was going today Laughing

And

For another Pith Helmet

Posted: Tue May 07, 2019 1:56 pm

Another one? I'll toast to that!

Posted: Tue May 07, 2019 2:02 pm

15.00 - Our idiot, to my manager Akwoodi... he's already panicked and nervous. Laughing

Quote:

Sir this is really wasting this me I have to go back on time

Akwoodi, trying to control the situation with professionalism. Laughing

Quote:

Dear sir,
Please do not worry about this problem, because no matter how long that repair works, Joojoo will have to reach you.
He has your parcel in the car and also the money ($3,000) and he has to solve the delivery.
I'll try to get in touch with him to see if everything is ok with the car engine.
If needed, of course we can arrange for you and your friend to stay at the hotel overnight and Joojoo to take you tomorrow morning directly to the border.
You do not have to think about payment, because we'll pay for the whole bill when Joojoo gets there.
You're probably hungry and thirsty, so please feel comfortable there and order what you want!
Have a nice day!
Akwoodi

===

More fun with the moron... he sent countless messages, to Joojoo and Akwoodi:

Quote:

Oh no,I don't plan to sleep overnight I want everything done today.....pls my plan is to go back home today and I don't sleep outside pls make it solve today

Quote:

I can't wait longer pls find alternative to make this done right my second is angry and complaining this shouldn't be and excuse find order way out if that car not OK is a company bus find another am worried don't tell me not to,fr the first time you keep me here I have to go home today. Not tomorrow..... Pls do something

Quote:

Hello pls look fr order way to deliver time is going you have to do something

Quote:

Pls that's not an excuse look fr order way to deliver me on time or are you playing me

Quote:

I don't understand what's going on they keep telling me car problem let them look fr alternative.... And going back home today

Quote:

Pls what's going on am late nobody knows where I went and I can't stay over everything has to be solve today this is not good what am seeing how like ng now...

Quote:

I can't stay here long here anymore do something on time ....my place is very far and pls let me go on time,what you telling and I don't believe.... Why are you doing this

Quote:

Where are you now..... Is getting late

Quote:

How can I get you and how many kilometres to where you are so we can finish it thier

Quote:

Pls tell us where we can meet him so we can do every thing right I can't afford this anymore...

Quote:

We're inpatient and worried....

16.15 - Finally, Akwoodi responds to the poor lad:

Quote:

Dear sir,
Please be patient, because Joojoo's phone seems to be closed, or with the battery fully discharged.
Now I'm looking to get in touch with someone in the car workshop.
I will come back tp you immediately with details.
Have a nice evening!
Akwoodi

Danyboi, to Akwoodi:

Quote:

Am not happy with what you trying to do fr me now is a shame fr me here I don't like it pls I can't wait long you make me look stupid at this hotel in fact I don't take anything what am here fr pls do this arrangement on time

===

16.30 - Our boy, extremely upset. Laughing

Quote:

This is getting out of hand like serious this is disappointment Mr akwoodi and am not happy with what is happening... This is not the plan when the car brake down look fr alternative simple....

Manager Akwoodi invite the idiot to spend a night in Bohicon:

Quote:

Dear sir, the repair can not be done today because the new piece (the radiator) will arrive at the workshop only tomorrow morning. From Parakou to Cotonou are over 400 km and the van broke down near Cotonou. I do not have another car available in the area, so that's why I accepted Joojoo to stop at Bohicon for the necessary repairs.
Under these conditions, Joojoo will have to sleep in Bohicon tonight. We chose the Des Princes Hotel because it has an excellent cuisine and is in the middle of the city.
I told Joojoo that you would arrive there tonight and he would have to pay for your personal room and for all of your expenses.
From where you are now, in a straight line, are just 23 km to the Place de l'Etoile Rouge (in Cotonou), where is the main city bus station.
There are some local buses and you have to take one of the many buses to Alada - Bohicon. It's just 120 km and it's a short road of 1.5-2 hours.
Hotel Des Princes is located right in the center of Bohicon and everyone knows where it is. Joojoo will be there.
Tomorrow morning, after the repair will be done, Joojoo will bring you back to the border with Nigeria.
All of your expenses are the responsibility of our company.
I deeply regret the unpleasant situation and I hope your stay is as pleasant as possible under these conditions!
Have a nice evening!
Akwoodi

I'm sure the idiot will appreciate so much my hospitality! Muhahahahaha! Laughing

===

Danyboi to Akwoodi:

Quote:

Am going home, what time are we meeting tomorrow....

Akwoodi:

Quote:

Dear sir,
Do you think it's a wise idea to go back to Nigeria now and come back tomorrow?
Given that you could stay at the hotel overnight and everything is just the company's expense?
You can stay at the hotel, and Joojoo will pay for all the costs tomorrow morning.
Akwoodi

Danyboi:

Quote:

By 10:00 we meet here tomorrow this bad from what you sent me

and

Quote:

I don't get am scared of all this did you know the manager...

===

16.57 - Danyboi request another meeting ... tomorrow. LOL!

Quote:

Are you sure of this cos this look strange to me ....

Quote:

Yes am going home we meet tomorrow OK you waste my time and you ready tomorrow let me know and let him wait and I will meet him OK

17.15 - Akwudi:

Quote:

Of course everything will be done as you wish, but I do not find it a good idea to leave and return to the same place.
Anyway, I will inform Mr. Claude about these events and reconfirm the meeting tomorrow at 10.00 am in the same place.
Have a nice evening!
Akwoodi

===

LOL!
It seems he has decided to sleep somewhere in the area... probably at the hotel was too expensive, so the two idiots will choose to sleep in the bushes. Laughing

Quote:

OK I will find a place and hang at seme border so when you arrive let me know

... another sad message, regarding Joojoo and our "good quality" services. Laughing

Quote:

Let him text me if he's their befr I com if not I won't com I waste a lot today again am really tired and feed up of your service is not in good other why you Guy's should have plan b not is shit am really disappointed in your service..

Akwoodi's response:

Quote:

Dear sir,
If you really intend to stay there, at another local hotel (although I repeat, I do not understand why you have not stayed at Hotel 241), then I will ask you to keep the receipt with which you pay for the room. So that we can also reimburse this expense. Okay? If possible, I would like to know the hotel you sleep at tonight, so I can be sure everything is okay with you and your friend.
I will ask Joojoo to contact you immediately, although I had already said to him he had a free program tonight (because you refused to go there).
Have a nice evening!
Akwoodi

===

18.05 - Our fun continues Laughing

... the idiot tries to impose his will and express his doubts. LOL!

Quote:

What are you say when joojoo get their tomorrow people there will tell him that we came especially the manager OK and if you really mean this stuff to be delivered let him massage me as soon he arrive their. I will come meet him even Claude himself I will massage him another disappointment which I hate most time is time when this happen like this you should have plan b not this you telling me ok. Service company I know they have plan b...in Case of anything that happen you switch to plan b,do you know what you cause to me and my friend today and you ask us to sleep,nobody knows if is true or lies seeing is believing not possible.we meet tomorrow when he's their he should let me know that's just it....nobody believe again cos this is just like joke

18.22 - Joojoo wrote to our idiot. I'm sure Danyboi will be very happy to read these news. Laughing

Quote:

BRODA SHOUD HAV BEE HERE AM TEL YU HONSTLY OOOOHHHHH
MA ONCLE AKWUDE HAS AGRIED TO REMBORSE SOME EXPENSES
SO AM INVITD 2 GIRLS WID BIG BOBOS TO MA RUUM AM BOGHT GUD LIQUEUR NA LOT OF INDIAN WEEDS
AM WANNA SPEEND ALL NIGT WID THOOS 2 YUNG RED HEIER GIRLS
WOULDE BE BETTA TO BI HERE WID MI THA TO GO YUR HOM TONIGT OK

Muhahaha!
Danyboi to Joojoo:

Quote:

Don't worry we
Meet tomorrow but make sure you are there and contact me I get meet you the manager will address you of my arrival

Danyboi to Akwoodi:

Quote:

Just let you time be time so tomorrow no excuses ok

Yeap, sure, no problem! Laughing

Akwoodi:

Quote:

Okay sir, it's your choice.
Tomorrow, at 12.00, Joojoo will be in the parking lot at Hotel241 in Seme area.
Have a nice evening!
Akwoodi

===

19.15 - Our boy:

Quote:

We meet at hotel241seme that's where I want,and how many hotel241 is there in seme

and

Quote:

Am let's make it 10:00 so that it will be fast when he get there and I confirm is there I will be there in no time.

19.27 - Akwoodi:

Quote:

Dear sir, I do not know what to think about you anymore.
It's already the third time you change your mind and propose another arrangement.
Please write here, very clearly, what time you will be present tomorrow at the meeting place.
It is enough to search on Google: Hotel 241 Seme and you will find everything that interests you.
I told you the exact address and the phone number, today you were there.
What does all these strange questions and conditions mean?
I'll tell about it to Claude, because this whole story starts to be very suspicious. Where are you right now?
Have a nice evening!
Akwoodi

===

20.15 - Well, our boy is trying to be naughty and rude.

Quote:

Pls tell him I want to hear him now whose fault you kept me waiting all day and letter ask me to sleep with no evidence when you know that you would talk to the manager and send him money fr that night,what if he didn't show up tomorrow what do you think will happen I don't do thing's that way.that's why I decide 10:00 he should be there even the manager will tell him that he saw us OK 10:00 when he get at hotel241seme as soon he get their I saw his massage I will show up am at home OK, just tell me it's done OK.

and

Quote:

Don't you saw those picture I sent you that's the hotel 241seme and we Will meet their. Period

So, manager Akwoodi writes to him... it is "the slap of the day". Laughing

Quote:

Well sir, look what's up.
Your tone is completely inappropriate, and I am not the person with whom you allow yourself to speak like that.
I just wanted to solve your delicate problem effectively, because my colleague Claude asked me to help you.
My duty is to make sure that the person who receives the package is indeed the person entitled to do so.
This is the Regulation and no one can force me to neglect its provisions! You understand me? I hope so!
Tomorrow, Joojoo will expect you to send the photo with you in front of the hotel. A NEW photo, not the one you sent today!
In this way, I will make sure that you have arrived there and that you have indeed presented yourself at the meeting place.

You need to understand that my driver will not come to wait for you! You will wait for him!
Because his van is full of other undelivered parcels and I do not want to risk absolutely nothing!

Claude will be informed and he will be able to make what he wants, but here in Benin I am the only one who's responsible for deliveries and I oversee the application of the Regulation! If you are not present at 10.00AM in the parking zone, in front of the Hotel 241 and if you do not send your new photo made there tomorrow morning, then Juju will come back to the depot and will not deliver your parcel.
In this case, you will be invited to come personally to Parakou and pick up your parcel directly from our warehouse.
I hope I was pretty clear and I hope you understand that you are not in a position to impose anything about our Rules.
Period!
Akwoodi

===

Posted: Tue May 07, 2019 7:51 pm

Finally a message from Danni. 20 minutes ago

Danni: Emma I have problems with all of you Lydia and the stupid company all of you like seriously
Emma: What's the problem?
How was work today?

He read the first message, the second was sent immediately after that, but he didn't receive it. Maybe his battery is dead. I can't wait around for an answer, so can have to explain tomorrow

Posted: Tue May 07, 2019 7:54 pm

^^^ LOL! Poor Danyboi. Laughing

20.43 - Our idiot wrote to Akwoodi... his tone has calmed down. Laughing

Quote:

Is it hotel 241or hotel241seme cos when I check it there are two hotel with the same name, where I go is hotel 241seme,let me know whose hotel is it now.

Akwoodi's answer:

Quote:

Sir, did you drink anything and you can not control your behavior? What kind of question is this?
We're talking about the same hotel where you've been today.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XoGXjfLJzKU
You must be present there in front of the hotel tomorrow morning before 10.00.
You will take the necessary photo and send it directly to Joojoo by email.
Only after he will receive your new photo will come to you and deliver the parcel.

If you do not accept the conditions, please let me know.
I'll tell Joojoo that tomorrow morning he will only deliver in Cotonou and then return home to Parakou.
Akwoodi

===

20.55 - Ten minutes later, Danyboi asked me (regarding Joojoo's presence tomorrow). Laughing

Quote:

And are you pretty sure he will make it cos and tired of all this stress...

Akwoodi:

Quote:

Dear sir, please do not be naughty with me. Ok?
Today I offered you the best accommodation and I accepted any kind of expense you and your friend had made.
You preferred to leave that good hotel and go somewhere else where you probably went to drink.
Do not you try to tell me that you are now in Lagos!
Do not you deny the fact that you chose to sleep in Seme, who knows where!
The fact that you are trying to lie to me with such obvious things makes me not trust you at all, and this has already been communicated to Claude.
I do not know who you are and I do not know where you are.
You refused to meet Joojoo and pretend that he would come to a place where you are not present.
It's something strange with you and I can not figure out what.
Akwoodi

Wannabe Baiter Joined: 28 Oct 2018 Posts: 90

Wonderful! Love the barrage of emails, especially when he says he looked like an idiot at the hotel.

Too bad he didn't agree to meeting JooJoo at the mechanic shop, because then JooJoo might have not gotten the message, and the car got fixed, and JooJoo went to the hotel so they get crossed back and forth.

In the future it might be fun to include discussion of the suffering of the goat. Everyone could appear to be more upset about the goat than about the lad Smile

Or maybe JooJoo could be distraught about it, and gets drunk, or needs a day to recover from the trauma before he can drive again.

Posted: Tue May 07, 2019 10:16 pm

22.00 - Our little lad is extremely frustrated Laughing

... he feels something wrong, but his greed is too big and he has invested too much to get back.

Quote:

Can you see your, life after pretending that you're coming and again I can't sleep another mans country let Claude massage me himself .....go to the hotel and ask the manager OK. You failed to replie for an hour like you're a joker not me cos I get to the exact place am reporting back to England I don't deal with thing like this how could you say that out of your mind that's your plan to keep the parcel back to your self and losing all my money fr the second time hmm,how sure are you gonna show up tomorrow says the manager and when tomorrow come you didn't show up what do you think will happen pls mind the way you talk to me am not a kid OK.let me know if is done or not I don't have time fr shit am who I am OK...

22.10 - Ten minutes later...

Quote:

10:00 tomorrow period and let's see what will happen, if you bring up another complain

So, tomorrow morning, our idiot will be present again at the meeting place. Staff at the hotel will be delighted to see them again, the two morons waiting there. Laughing

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