The Return (and Return) of Fred Johnson

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Posted: Tue Dec 26, 2017 2:21 am

Some Lads go silent for a short while; other Lads go silent for a long while.
This Lad did both.

The Scammers
Fred Johnson, who can somehow reconcile “I am a Christian, i can never and will never be involve in a fraudulent act” with admitting to “a certain money i stole while in office”.
Cyril Benjamin, “Head Private Banking Dept. Barclays Bank Ghana LTD”

The Baiter
Malcolm Reynolds

PART 1: HERE COMES MR JOHNSON

7 March 2013
My name is Mr Fred Johnson, i am writing you this email this day to ask for your help, because a man can not do all things alone, and have the true result or success he/she needs.
I had a deal with one of the Minister of Mineral resources in my country and the deal was successful, we agreed on 70%-30%, and my 30% of the deal is $18 million. Now this money has been paid into the bank in my name. Now i want to invest this money, but i can not get this money out of the bank and they will question me how come i get this money and the account has being dormant. with my status and my job, i can not have such money in my account, and i can not take this money out for it will lead me to money laundering.
Now, i have speak with my account officer, and he advise me to get some one out of the country whom i will present as the depositor of this fund and every information's will be changed to that persons name, and the bank will transfer the money to that persons designated account without any questions.
I know this is a huge amount of money and i intend you use it well and my plans is to go into Estate management so i know this money will be my starting point and i do not want to loose this money.
Please i am asking for your interest over this deal, to stand as the depositor of this fund so that the bank can transfer it to your account and I PROMISE TO SHARE IT WITH YOU 50%-50%. All i need from you is your sincerity and your trust, i am not greedy at all, and i want you to know that your faithful help you rendered to me will build a perpetual relationship between us.I know it too well that there are so much corruption and scam in the world today, but in the midst of bad and wicked people. there are still good and kind people, but they are very few. I do hope that i have find one of the few people who have that heart of humanity.
Probably you may have had such mail from some one some time ago, but i want to let you know that i have a job by which is enough to pay my bills and care for my family, i will never engage in any wicked act to cheat any one on earth for what ever i do to some one will one day happen back to me in the other way, that. is life and i know it has its time to function
I will like to hear from you soon and what ever questions you need to ask me, please feel free to do that, and i will be very glad to reply and update you.
Best regards,
Mr Fred Johnson

I decided on a change from “Why me?”

Mr Johnson
You said you had a deal with a Minister - I'd need to know what sort of deal exactly.
Malcolm Reynolds

The Lad is quite candid at this point. It’ll be worth mentioning later.

Than you Mr. Reynold for your reply,
You ask me to tell you what the deal is all about between i and the minister, well the deal is done that is where the money comes in but i will tell you just as you requested.
The Government awarded a contract to the minister to reinforce delapidated projects like schools, hospital, and few road, In one of the school, directly behind it is my land, and their is crud oil pipeline that pass through it, when he noticed, he call on my attention and ask us to have a deal, he gave me some money to facence that place up and build it as if i am about to build a fertilizer manufacturing company. that we did, and from there we began to have access to the crud oil pipeline and sale them, and we make so much money, with his influence, he deposited my own share of the money in the bank.
Now he is no more in the office and the government has ask him to declare his asset and its done without any offense or charges against him. Now the deal has been closed and i need to use this money, but i can not be able to have it for the bank will question me. that is why i have to ask for help from a foreigner so that we can share it 50%-50%, this is the best idea my account office rendered to me.
Please i need you to reply me and tell me your interest over this, as i wait to read from you.
Thank you once more for your mail, i am very grateful.
Regards,
Mr. Fred Johnson

Mr Johnson
That money looks to have been made via very shady means. How are you going to make anyone believe that I deposited it in the bank? Please be serious about this!
Malcolm Reynolds

8 March 2013
Thank you Mr. Malcom
It is very easy to do that, that is why my account officer advises me to get a foreigner to stand as the depositor of this fund as a business man, All you need to do is to provide your personals, and he will walk on the original Documents to your personals and the bank has nothing to question about it provided, your information's are well placed and all required details were provided.
Then it will absolutely be done without any delay or questionnaires I need you to tell me your interest now so that we can proceed here. This is very serious and i can not be joking in such manner.
Regards,
Mr Fred Johnson

He wants a business man? Let’s see how he takes the bad news!

Mr Johnson
I'm not a business man - I'm a retired US Marine.
Malcolm Reynolds

He doesn’t care. OK, but he can’t say that I didn’t tell him.

Dear Mr. Malcolm Reynolds,
I want to thank you for your correction and up-date, i have taken note of that.
In order to proceed, i hereby humbly ask you to give me your coordinates if you accept this deal so that i will forward them to my account officer to fill in your personals in the original documents so that we can proceed on.
I wait to read from you and as well as having your details.
Mr. Fred Johnson

Mr Johnson,
Please fill me in on when all these things were supposed to have happened.
Malcolm Reynolds

9 March 2013
Dear Mr. Reynolds,
This issue is starting right away, if you are interested about this, please give me your coordinates in details.
Mr Fred Johnson

Mr Johnson
There's no point in telling you anything until I'm sure there's nothing that's going to torpedo this deal. Now, please give the timeframes I asked for.
Malcolm Reynolds

Dear Mr. Raynolds,
You have not yet tell me your interest on this deal, and i do not understand what you mean by i should give you the timeframes. Please make a point, but you are telling me that it does not make any point to you until you are sure there's nothing that is going to torpedo this deal.
I am sure of the success of what i am asking for your help.
Mr. Fred

Mr Johnson
You told me that I should pretend to be the one that deposited the money. When was I supposed to have done that?
Malcolm Reynolds

10 March 2013
Dear Mr. Reynolds,
That is the reason i am asking you to give me your details so that your information's will be filled in the original documents then we can proceed in presenting you as the depositor to the fund.
Please kindly give me your information's.
Mr. Fred Johnson

Mr Johnson,
You've asked for informations, coordinates... what exactly do you mean?
Malcolm Reynolds

13 March 2013
Dear Mr. Reynoilds,
I need your information's to so that my account officer can fill in your details as the original depositor of the fund, then we can proceed. that is why i have to be sure if you have accepted this deal and ready to work with me. Your 50% of the fund remains valid.
I wait to hear from you,
Mr Fred

Mr Johnson
I am neither a mind-reader nor one given to second-guessing. State exactly what you mean by "information's".
Malcolm Reynolds

Dear Mr. Reynolds,
I need your name in full, date of birth, occupation, marital status, Home/office address, Telephone number, Nationality, and a Scan copy of your passport.
This is essential only if you are ready for this deal.
Mr. Fred

Mr Johnson
You can have all those things except the passport copy, which is forbidden under Federal law.
Malcolm Reynolds

That wasn’t well received.

14 March 2013
Dear Mr. Malcolm Reynolds,
One thing you always fail to do is to provide the required, give me your information's then along side of it you can tell me that you can not release your passport.
But i do not think you are ready for this, it seems to me that you are a joker. Let me ask you a question, Can you open an account in your country without your passport identification card? Its not possible, if you can not do this deal with me, you better let me know, i am not here for any jokes.
Mr. Fred

Let’s see if he has any issues with Mal’s explanation about passports (emphasis in original).

Mr Johnson
Americans don't carry ID cards, but that's by the by. What I am saying is that COPIES of passports aren't allowed.
When I opened my current account, the bank form noted that I'd shown my passport and recorded the number and the expiry date; they didn't make a scan of it. Do you understand that last bit? They did not make a copy of the passport. Is that clear?
name in full: Malcolm Paul Reynolds
date of birth: July 4, 1968
occupation: Survival Instructor
marital status: Single (not sure why that's relevant)
Home/office address: 2/44 Stuart Drive, Alice Springs, Northern Territory, Australia 0870
Telephone number: +61 x xxxx xxxx
Nationality: US
So now that I've proved you wrong and given you the details you wanted, are you prepared to stop with the insults and behave like an adult?
Malcolm Reynolds

He didn’t bother replying to that, but went to Part 2!

Posted: Wed Dec 27, 2017 11:10 pm

PART 2: ENTER THE BANKER

15 March 2013
I AM MR. CYRIL BENJAMIN FROM BARCLAYS BANK
BARCLAYS BANK GHANA LTD
FOREIGN REMITTANCE DEPARTMENT
PAYMENT AND INTERNATIONAL SERVICES
INTERNATIONAL PRIVATE BANKING
HEADQUARTERS @ ACCRA GHANA,
BRANCH, SPINTEX ACCRA GHANA
From the Desk of: Mr. Cyril Benjamin
Head Private Banking Dept.
Barclays Bank LTD.
Kind Attention: Mr. Malcolm Paul Reynolds!
I am directed this day the 14th day of March 2013, to write you this urgent and comprehensive email regarding Mr. Fred Johnson's officer. I will use this medium to brief you what this is all about.
Mr. Fred Johnson, had a deal with one of the Ministers, and the deal was successfully done, and he has its own part of the money deposited in our bank via the influence of the ex-minister, who they both came to my office, and stated this clearly to me.
Now This minister is out of office, and Mr. Fred Johnson, need to have this money, but due to the state the present government, the bank will not be able to release that money to him, for it will lead to so much questionnaires, which in diaspora, his salary will not be able to amount to that sum. Now the best option for him is to get a sincere and trusted foreigner who will not deny him when the fund gets to his account and will stand as the depositor to this fund so that we can transfer this money to this person, and Mr Fred with his beneficiary knows best how to go about sharing their money, all i have to do is to ensure a successful transfer.
Two days ago, he told me about you that you have accepted to help him, for a successful deal.
Now he forwarded me your personal information's (your coordinates) so that i call fill in your details to the original documents as the depositor.
But before i do that, i want to let you know the rules and procedures we must know and follow to avoid suspect and error.
This is very confidential even before the bank until the fund is fully re-activated, then your detail/information's will reflect on the said account and will also be in our banking data-base system for legal transfer.
I want to let you know that the total said amount is $18 million USD.
And i want you to reply me thereby accepting this roles so that i can proceed in filling in your datas.
Bellow are your information's, please check if there is any error and made adequate correction, so that i will commence.
Your name in full, Malcolm Paul Reynolds
Date of birth, July 4, 1968
Occupation,- Survival Instructor
Marital status,-Single
Home/Office address,-2/44 Stuart Drive, Alice Springs, Northern Territory, Australia 0870
Nationality, AMERICAN
Telephone Number,-+61 2 8006 4317
I look forward to read your reply in earnest.
Yours sincerely
Mr. Cyril Benjamin

A particular phrase caught my eye, as you’ll see below.

Mr Benjamin
Everything's in order with my personal info, but I'd like to know some things, such as:
[1] "i want to let you know the rules and procedures we must know and follow to avoid suspect and error. " - What are those rules and procedures?
[2] "for it will lead to so much questionnaires, which in diaspora, his salary will not be able to amount to that sum. " - I'm confused. If Mr Johnson is an Israeli, why does he need me, since he's already a foreigner?
Malcolm Reynolds

Wikipedia explain “Diaspora” as “a scattered population whose origin lies within a smaller geographic locale... the movement of the population from its original homeland.” Originally it referred to the Israelites being exiled from their homeland, but the word now encompasses many other ethnicities; Scots, Irish, Armenians, Indians, sub-Saharan Africans. and Chinese, to name but a few. Mal is only familiar with the original meaning, of course.

16 March 2013
I acknowledged your mail regarding to the previous mail i sent you, requesting you to examine your details to avoid error, and the corresponding reply from you asking me to kindly paraphrase what i meant by the rules and procedures we must know and follow to avoid suspect and error.
The rules here i mean to let you know is that;
1.) The account has been dormant, and must be re-activated before it can be operated on.
2.) You must obey every instruction given to you to actualize this, perhaps as a depositor, must know these rules so that any violation to the rules may not lead to suspecting your claims whereby every depositor must have a copy of these instructions and guide-lines.
3.) You must re-activate the account so that your datas will fully reflect in the banking data base system and NOT that of Mr. Fred Johnson information's anymore.
4.) You must bear in mind that this is a deal and thereby not to ague with instructions.
Finally, your last question was, if Mr. Fred Johnson is a foreigner? The answer is NO. He is an indigen of this country, and from the mail a first sent you, i pointed at this vividly. You can reflect by taking a glance of it.
I hope to hear from you soon and by Monday morning, when i am back in the office, I will let you know what it will take to re-activate the account and proceed. Please do have a close/constant communication with Mr. Fred Johnson. I will also update him as well over this.
I look forward to read your reply in earnest.
Yours sincerely
Mr. Cyril Benjamin

Your attitude is noted, Lad! And you owe me something.

Mr Benjamin
I am not an employee of your bank and as such you don't give me orders.
You said that every depositor must have a list of the rules and guidelines. Fine - send me a copy of this list.
Finally - you used a term about Mr Johnson which applies only to Israelis, so I don't see how he can be a native of your country.
Malcolm Reynolds

Mr Johnson returns, and… well, check out the parts I’ve emphasised.

Dear Mr. Malcolm Reynolds,
How are you doing today? I want to let you know that Mr. Cyril Benjamin has just wrote me email confirming that he has received your details and has started filling in your information's to the original datas, and he also told me that the account will be re-activated soon and by Monday, he will let you know what it will take to re-activate it.
I must tell you that i am a happy and fulfilled man now, you have really make me happy. Thank you for keeping your words, and i will be very happy to read from you as soon as possible for adequate communication.
Hope to read from you soon, please do you care to have my mobile number so that you can call me if you wish?
Mr. Fred Johnson

Mr Johnson
I don't know what you told Mr Benjamin about yourself, but he said that you were a native of Ghana while at the same time talking about you as an Israeli. This is not making much sense to me.
Malcolm Reynolds

Dear Mr, Malcolm Reynolds,
I am not an Israeli, i am a Ghanaian, but if there is any way you find that, then its a error please take note.
Mr. Fred

Mr Johnson
The word "diaspora" applies only to Jews and by extension Israelis. Why Mr Benjamin used it about you makes no sense otherwise.
Malcolm Reynolds

That didn’t hold things up for long, unfortunately. Still, there’ll be more opportunities!

18 March 2013
I hereby write to let you know this morning, that i have gotten all your information's well fix in and its only waiting for a re-activation so that we can operate on account for transfer
Now you are to re-activate this account with just $1,550 only and after the re-activation, your datas, will now reflect on the bank data base system as the depositor of this fund and the bank will not have any question but to proceed in transferring the fund to your account.
The best way to pay this money is to send it via western Union and the same day, it will be made payable to your account and a payment teller will be issued and must be attached to your file.
I wait to hear from you on how to send the money, but before i do that, I have to take permission from Hon. Fred Johnson, which name to provide, for i am not the only one to pass on instructions, but to speak with my colleague, Hon Fred Johnson.
Yours sincerely,
Mr. Cyril B.A.

Mal still wants the rules and guidelines that he’s supposed to obey.

Mr Benjamin
I'd like to have a copy of the rules and guidelines that all depositors must have.
Malcolm Reynolds

And Cyril provides another stick to beat him with (emphasis added).

19 March 2013
Kind Attention: Mr. Malcolm Paul Reynolds!
[What you are asking for, you can't have it now, for it is stated in the form that was given to every one who wish to have an account with the bank, to go through it abide on them, thereby fill in his information's and submit it back to the bank and that is what make up the file for that individual.]
I wrote you a mail telling you of the re-activation of the account, but you never reply me on that, rather you pretend as if you do not read the mail. Please we are not joking here, you go according to instructions and to the mail you received per-time if you are truly ready for this.
Finally, i have speak with Hon. Fred Johnson, and he ask me to give you the payment information so that it can be faster to re-activate and transfer. Bellow are the information.
Name: Cyril Awaya
Amount: $1,550.00
Text Qus: God's Ways,
Text Ans: Mysterious ways
Location: Accra Ghana
I wait to hear from you
Yours sincerely,
Mr. Cyril B.A.

19 Mar 2013
Mr Benjamin
I have no idea what email you're talking about.
Malcolm Reynolds

20 March 2013
Ok, do not worry about the previous email which you said you have no idea about, now this is what we need to do so that we can continue in transferring the fund to you.
You need to re-activate the account and it will cost just $1,550.00 only
Finally, i have speak with Hon. Fred Johnson, and he ask me to give you the payment information so that it can be faster to re-activate and transfer. Bellow are the information.
Name: Cyril Awaya
Amount: $1,550.00
Text Qus: God's Ways,
Text Ans: Mysterious ways
Location: Accra Ghana
I wait to hear from you
Yours sincerely,
Mr. Cyril B.A.

I’ll keep asking…

19 Mar 2013
Mr Benjamin
I looked back through the emails and you never sent me any form. That's pretty careless. If you want me to follow procedures, you should follow procedures too. Send me the form.
Malcolm Reynolds

20 March 2013
I want to let you know that you need no form now just re-activate the account now by following the payment information i sent you earlier and give me the payment information's
Yours sincerely,
Mr. Cyril .B.A

And asking…

Mr Benjamin
I despair of getting straight answers from you. You wrote "What you are asking for, you can't have it now, for it is stated in the form that was given to every one who wish to have an account with the bank, to go through it abide on them, thereby fill in his information's and submit it back to the bank and that is what make up the file for that individual." Since I want to have an account in the bank, why am I not filling out this form?
Malcolm Reynolds

21 March 2013
Mr. Malcolm Reynolds,
I do not have time for your foolish questions, if you are not ready for this please you can go away, i have so many other things to do.
I will like you to send the foolish mail you sent to me and forward it your your colleague Mr Fred Benjamin, and hear what his reactions may be.
One thing i find out in you is that you claim to be very wise and to know all things, people like you are those who fall victims of foolishness.
Mr. Cyril

A minor slap, and some bad news…

Mr Benjamin
I don't see my questions as foolish at all. You stressed a point (the form) and then tried to handwave it. I was naturally puzzled by your action.
In any event, since you wish this to proceed (and I assume Mr Johnson likewise), I'll send the fee, but only to a bank account. There are restrictions on Western Union about certain countries, and West African nations are high on the list.
Malcolm Reynolds

I didn’t expect him to fold so abjectly! And a piggy to report!

23 March 2013
Dear Mr. Malcolm Reynolds,
I am very sorry if i must have used hash voice on you please pardon my wrong words to you and please forgive me.
I feel so sad when i read your mail and you where pointing out on how i was saying that you are foolish, please forgive my wrong words.
I did quite agree with you on what you have just said consigning the Western Union Restrictions to West Africa Nations,
Here is the account information below, Please i will need a scan copy of the payment information for my prove to Mr. Fred Johnson.
A/C Name: Cyril Awaya.
A/C Number: xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Swift Code: ECOCGHAC. PMB,GPO,ACCRA.
ECOBANK GHANA LIMITED. BRANCH.
Please kindly pay these $1,550.00 and do not fail to scan the payment slip.
Yours sincerely,
Mr. Benjamin C.

I didn’t reply.

26 March 2013
Dear Mr. Malcolm R,
I have not hear from you all this while. what is going on? Mr. Cyril told me that he has given you the information so that the account can be reactivated, but you have not yet write him email. Please i do not understand what is going on
I wait to read from you.
Mr. Fred Johnson

Damn, another problem!

26 March 2013, 0:46
Mr Johnson
My bank manager has told me that business in West Africa is risky owing to the massive level of internet fraud - 419 schemes - derived from that region.
Malcolm Reynolds

Fred sends back a mixture of smarm and religiosity... and a claim that makes no sense (emphasis added). And the last part of that sentence has some interesting implications.

27 March 2013
Dear Mr. Malcolm,
I want to thank you for telling me your mind over this issue. You are very right by saying that the tendency of Scam in West Africa is very high, that i do bear with you. But i will like you to have this at the back of your mind that, in the midst of bad and wicked people, their are still good people.
I want to put it clear to you that, if for instance, people say that Americans are the most wicked and heartless people in the world, their are still good, God fearing and faithful people in America today.
I want to say a big thank you for letting me know your intentions on time so that it wont be late when every thing has already been placed in your name. Thanks for your great maturity, i truly appreciate. I know if God be God, He will provide some one who will believe me and to believe that even thought that their are criminals all over the world, their are still good people on earth.
Thank you once more dear Malcolm, May God bless you and your family and keep you and make your job be a blessing to your generation and may the good Lord bless the work of your hand, may He bless your going out and your coming in ... Amen.
Dear Malcolm, I am a Christian, i can never and will never be involve in a fraudulent act till i see Jesus face to face.
God bless,
Mr. Fred Johnson

Mr Johnson
I'm not a Christian; I'm an atheist. In my experience religion doesn't stop anyone from being a criminal. Eric Prince of Blackwater is a fundamentalist Christian but that doesn't stop him from being a corrupt and racist scumbag.
I defy you to find anything in my message that said anything about West Africans as people being "bad and wicked". Mr Braithwaite simply pointed out that West Africa is a major source of cyber-crime; the other big source is Romania.
And since you mention "I am a Christian, i can never and will never be involve in a fraudulent act" - remind me how you made that money in the first place.
Malcolm Reynolds

That last remark must have cut deep, because the Lads took a holiday!

Posted: Thu Dec 28, 2017 11:25 pm

PART 3: BACK AFTER THE BREAK

14 June 2013
Dear Mr. Malcolm Reynolds,
I am writing you email this day regarding your fund. We noticed that you have voluntarily abandoned your fund here, and thereby not stating your intentions over your act. We are writing you this very mail to notify you that you are advise to call your fund back or you make a clear testimony and attest to it that you are giving us a memorandum and every authority to do away with your fund.
Please you are requested to advise for further actions.
Best regards,
Cyril Benjamin A.

Mr Benjamin
I abandoned nothing; you simply ceased replying to my emails, and since you never sent me the form you said I needed to fill out, I assumed that the matter was cancelled.
Malcolm Reynolds

Dear Mr Malcolm Paul, Reynolds,
I acknowledge your mail and i am also sending you a scan copy of the form. Please print it out, fill in your personal in Block letters and it must be in pen only, and resend it back to me alongside with your scan ID.
Faithfully follow all rules requested in the very form and comply to them all.
Regards,
Mr Cyril Benjamin A.

The form was nothing special, so I haven’t included it.

Mr Benjamin
Two things you should address.
[1] "Faithfully follow all rules requested in the very form and comply to them all" - There are no rules; just empty spaces. Are you sure you sent the correct form?
[2] "you are giving us a memorandum and every authority to do away with your fund" - what exactly do you mean by that?
Malcolm Reynolds

15 June 2013
Dear Mr Malcolm Paul, Reynolds,
Yes in that form contains your personal datas, and it is strictly required to be accurate.
The memorandum here simply means if you fail to adhere to the instruction given to you, and refuse to tender all your information and fail to return the form given to you, it shows that you are not determind to do it. And it also means that if you do not continue with this transfer, and we could not hear from you, then it is an avenue for the bank to do away with the fund.
Best regards,
Mr Cyril B.A

Mr Benjamin
Let me point out two things.
Firstly no bank is allowed to simply seize funds on whim, which is you say you will do.
Secondly, that money would still belong to Fred Johnson, so he would get it back again - not you or your cronies.
Malcolm Reynolds

This is exactly how the message was formatted.
It’s strange that he can say he’ll do away with the fund, yet claim to be trying to help Fred.

15 June 2013
I thank i am done with you, Mr Fred Johnson need a worthy man, not some one like you

Mr Benjamin
You cannot be "done with [me]" - this isn't something that you can handwave into irrelevance. Besides, it's not your decision, even though you might think it is. You should know your place and stay in it.
Malcolm Reynolds

You are just proving no point Mr lecturer. Do what you were ask to do. forget what you think you know.

Hey Fred, get back here!

Mr Johnson
Does this boneheaded clown speak for you? I sure hope not!
Malcolm Reynolds

17 June 2013
Dear Mr Malcolm Reynolds,
I am very sorry about my inability to write you mail, its as a result of my wife's health. my wife is very ill and has been in the hospital, so i have been running around to get money since i have no money at hand.
Regarding the action of my account officer Mr. Benjamin C.A. i am sorry if you are offended about that please do not be upset. Remember you are doing this for me not for him.
From the guidelines he gave me, he strictly pointed out that we must obey and follow his instruction. there are other things he ask me to do which i have done, and he is only waiting for you to respond by filling in your datas on the form he told me he sent you. and he was upset that you keep questioning him and not doing what he ask you to do. and if this continues, it will leads to the termination of that fund, thereby my government may be questioning me on how i got the money, so that is why he advise me to get some one and i found you, so that you are to stand as the depositor of the found, in that case i will be able to have the money and do my dream investments.
Please, do not be upset, but help and overlook what he says, and lets do his instructions ok
Please i am very sorry for not writing you all this while, its as a result of my wife's critical condition, it has really affect my personal life and every other thing i do. Please i need you to remember my wife in your prayers, she will be undergoing a serious operation.
I will be very happy to read from you soon.
Mr. F. Johnson

17 June 2013
Mr Johnson
So you have your reasons to have not written to me; Mr Benjamin didn't. If anything goes wrong it'll be down to him, not to me.
I might also point out that I'm an atheist. No amount of mumbling and hand-clasping can change how things happen.
Malcolm Reynolds

18 June 2013
Dear Malcolm Reynolds,
To be sincere with you, i did not actually get what you wrote me. Are you saying that you are an artist, and no amount of applause moves you or changes things that happened's around you?
Now all i need is your co-operation. I will like you to fill in your datas in that very form that was given to you so that he can proceed in the transfer please.
Mr Fred Johnson

18 June 2013
Mr Johnson
I am an atheist. That means someone who does not believe in God - any god.
"No amount of mumbling and hand-clasping can change how things happen" means that prayer is useless and a waste of time.
I also would add that I am having major misgivings about helping you shift stolen millions from an impoverished nation.
Malcolm Reynolds

18 June 2013
Mr Malcolm,
So in summary, what are you saying over this deal i am asking of you. are you saying that you are not interested and not going to do anything about it?
Mr. Fred J.

19 June 2013
I am having major misgivings about helping you shift stolen millions from an impoverished nation.

And after that… silence for almost three years… then…

Posted: Fri Dec 29, 2017 8:50 pm

PART 4: MELTDOWN

17 April 2016
Dear Malcolm Reynolds,
How are you doing today? I was ill all this while i had an accident so i was off work for a very long time.
How are you doing today? What is going on with you, did anyone talk to you about the money?
I wait to read from you
Best regards
Fred Johnson

17 April 2016,
Mr Johnson
It's been three years. What the hell happened?
Malcolm Reynolds

17 April 2016
Dear Malcolm Reynolds,
Yes it really 3 years, I had an accident on my way to Kenya, but God saved my life, and i am Ok now and healthy again.
I am so sorry for the inconveniences, pain and delay this has caused you, it must have hurt you and how painful you must have feel over my absence.
How are you doing today? did anyone communicate with you in my absence this fund?
Please update me
Best Regards,
Mr Fred Johnson

18 April 2016
Mr Johnson
I barely remember your proposal. I remember being somewhat uneasy, and having to cope with some guy in a bank named Clarence who was an asshole, and that's it really.
Malcolm Reynolds

18 April 2016,
Hi Malcolm,
Do you still want to continue with the transaction?
Please state your intent now
Johnson

19 April 2016
Mr Johnson
OK, that brings back memories - as I recall, you wanted me to claim the money as mine. You, on the other hand, don't remember that I'm a retired US Marine with no business experience.
Malcolm Reynolds

19 April 2016
Dear Malcolm,
The proposal remains that, I need you to help me claim a certain money i stole while in office as a minister of Finance and Governor.
Since then, i can not be able to claim the fund. The government is monitoring everything about my wealth, and every business i do. So i want you to claim the money to your name, receive the money and make use of it into any business of your choice after 2 years when the government i completely out of office, i will share the money with you and whatever interest you made with it remains yours.
If you agree to this proposal, please kindly made it known to me.
Regards,
Fred

OK, let’s send down a curve ball and see how he takes it…

20 April 2016
Mr Johnson
Not so fast there, Bubba-Louie! You said you were gone three years because of an accident - but there's somewhere else you could have been in that time, and not by choice. See what I mean?
Malcolm Reynolds

Damn, he missed it!

20 April 2016
Mr Malcolm,
I leave it to you when you make your Choice
Johnson

20 April 2016
Mr Johnson
I leave it to you to be honest with me.
Malcolm Reynolds

20 April 2016
Mr Malcolm,
I remain honest and determined to work with you only if you are really ready and sincere to have this transaction get done with me.
Johnson

Forget subtlety!

20 April 2016
Mr Johnson
Trust is not easily earned. It sure as hell can't be demanded.
You're in possession of money you openly admit you stole from your government, which you also admit has you under observation. You come back after three years with some story about an accident - but something doesn't ring true.
You were in prison... that makes more sense.
Malcolm Reynolds

Good, that struck home… and the Lad says something that sounds utterly ridiculous (emphasis added).

20 April 2016
Malcolm
I was not in Prison and i still work there.
If i am a prisoner, how will my same company retain me.
Its obvious you are not serious, your are just living you daily life by assumption which is the worst thing any living creature can do. I am surprise at you despite all your knowledge
Johnson

I’m not letting that go!

20 April 2016
Your sense of right and wrong is totally fucked.
I'd have thought that anyone with any moral values worth a damn would agree that lying, cheating, stealing, raping and committing murder are all far worse crimes than "living... daily life by assumption".
For that offense to good sense, you belong in prison.

And it’s on for young and old!

20 April 2016
Malcolm, i was told that you are an idiot and a beast i never knew until now.
You are an educated illiterate and a professional fool.
You have no sense and i believe you actually belong to the prison also.
You are nothing but just a fuck
If i am lucky to meet you, i would have teach you how to respect people greater than you.
Nincompoop

20 April 2016
Did you serve in your country's armed forces? Did you ever fought for freedom and your country's honor? Did you ever risk your life for a just cause?
You ain't greater than me. You're a lying thieving parasite and you ain't fit to lick my boots. You're an asshole and you'll always be an asshole.

Ghana hasn’t been involved in any wars lately, apart from peace-keeping operations, so I doubt that the Lad ever served in Ghana’s armed forces.
He claims to have a picture of me. I never sent him any.

21 April 2016
Hahaha Malcaw. That is actually your name you are a caw.
I have forth for my country and i am a Force man also.
You are just a basterred to talk back at me. Animals like you are what i use for experiment.
I am sure they day i will locate you in your dingdong you call a house i will slash of you ash head off your disgusting neck.
I shall show you how to deal with animals like you soon, and i will make sure you loose your senses more because i know you have loose your sense of respect.
I have your picture, i will take it to the water line shrine where you will be eliminated for insulting me.
Ashole like you

I couldn’t resist a paraphrase of the classic lines from Taken… and a bit (just a bit) of the M4 Masterkey anecdote.

21 April 2016
You were never a soldier. You never fought for anything. You wouldn't know how to.
I have a very particular set of skills developed over eighteen years of service to my country - skills that give me power of life and death over a maggot like you if we ever met - and you wouldn't have a snowball's chance in hell.
I wouldn't dignify you with anything more than a shotgun blast to the head. You have no idea what a 12-gauge 00 round does to the head; I've seen it, and I saw the look on the jihadist's face just before I pulled the trigger and blew bone and blood and brain and hair across the wall behind him.
Only losers believe in voodoo, and that makes you a loser - a pathetic, useless, penniless loser without hope.

21 April 2016
Fuck off your mother your father your children and generation. A maggot like you. Gunshot to your brain. Bagga

21 April 2016
You were born in the gutter and you'll die in the gutter. It's all you deserve.

21 April 2016
Your entire life will die in the gutter idiot like you
That is how your generation will die in the gutter God punish you for life.
Idiot like you

21 April 2016
You think there's a God for you to order around? There is no God and there is no magic, you poor sad deluded fool.

22 April 2016
Ok Tonight you will know that there's God You will sleep and will see great things in your dreams.
You will see signs. You see magic.
Your leg will swell that you cannot walk

22 April 2016
Nope, I'm still walking, and there's still no God or magic.

And that’s the last I heard… so it’s The End.

(Or… IS IT?) (It is.)

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