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 Archie Fails to Join the Church of the Old Gods

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Big X
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PostPosted: Mon Mar 26, 2018 10:41 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

Roger reluctantly agrees to ask Mr Hilts for the payment slip, to appease Archie:

Quote:
I don't see any reason for doing all that, but I'll do it if it will make you happy. I just don't understand why your specious of Mr Hilts, cause I know that he is honest. I saw him send the money, and I am sure it won't be difficult at all for him to show me the prove of the transfer. Honestly Archie, what is the reason for all this? Are you just making trouble cause you don't trust that heathen unbeliever K woman to pick the money properly on your behave? Or is something else troubling you and making you act like this?

Well, whatever it is, I forgive you for using that foul cursive language against me. And I also forgive you for lying and blaming poor Mr Hilts for your actions. I spoke to Pastor Moses at Services yesterday and I told him that I still believed in you, and that he should allow you to complete the Church membership. He agreed to give you another chance, and said that he would not report your bad behavior to the Elders. You got very lucky that Pastor Moses is an understanding man! Not every Pastor would do that.

You should make the most of this second chance, Archie. Please do the initiation ceremony and finish your Church membership as soon as you can, so we can finally send you the $180,000.00 dollars from the bake sale and the new member grant from the Church. And you should probably apologize to Mr Hilts for falsely accusing him, too.


I'm sure he's not interested in apologizing to Hilts.


Hilts was prepared for Roger's request for proof, and he tells Archie so:

Quote:
What, did you seriously think that I wouldn't be ready if that idiot Roger asked for proof that I sent the cash? You sent his dumb ass over here thinking you had me trapped? Well think again, dipshit. I just showed him a bullshit fudged transfer slip that I faked and the old fool happily believed me. You really screwed yourself over here by trying to fuck with me. I'm amazed that you still don't know what is good for you. I’m the best fucking friend you have in the world, asshole.

But whatever, I'm not a man to hold a grudge while we can still make some goddam money. And in spite of your best efforts to be a goddam moron at every step, it sounds like you haven’t managed to fuck up the job completely yet. While he was here, Roger told me that even after the bullshit you pulled, the church is given you another chance to finish the last step of the membership. I suggest you fucking take it. Quit your bitching and moaning, and get that shit done so we can start draining the church accounts! We're so close to the big score!


Archie is not pleased:

Quote:
Go fuck yourself you son of a Bitch. I have told you if you ain't gonna pay Money no deal.


Hilts will respond appropriately tomorrow.

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Big X
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PostPosted: Wed Mar 28, 2018 3:01 am Reply with quoteBack to top

Hilts tells Archie he is still willing to work together:

Quote:
Dude, I’m not trying to fuck you over here. I told you several times that I’m gonna pay you what you earned, but it’s gotta be big money so we can put it through the money laundry. I’m not gonna ask my buddy to do money laundry on this small money, and I sure as shit can’t send it to you directly.

This shouldn’t be a surprise to you. I explained all this to you before, and you agreed to do it like this.

Finish the job like you said you would, than I’ll send you your full share. But not before.


And Archie tells Roger that he won't do the ceremony without getting paid:

Quote:
I have made myself clear enough, if you ain't sending money am not gonna complete the so-called ceremony.


Roger will be confused by this; didn't he already pay? Why is Archie asking for more?

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Big X
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PostPosted: Fri Mar 30, 2018 3:05 am Reply with quoteBack to top

Roger thinks he already sent the money through Hilts:

Quote:
I am very confused by what your saying. Didn't I already sent you money? Didn't you received the $20,000.00 dollars I sent threw the bank transfer with Mr Hilts? Why are you saying I need to send more money before you complete the ceremony?

And even still, I don't think this is the rite altitude for you to have about this, Archie. Why is it always about money with you? Don't you want to join the Church for the sake of Saving your immoral soul? Don’t you want to stop being a heathen unbeliever and enter into the Light of the Old Gods?

I don’t like to think bad things about someone who will become my Brother, but when you demand money like this you make me wander if your doing this for the rite reasons. I think may be you need to take some time to refract on what is really impotent to you, and than do the ceremony.


Archie blames Hilts again:

Quote:
I did not receive any money.

Hilts did not send any money to me, but I you about his evil plans toward you.

I want to sound a warning to you and your entire church.

Stop messaging me.


Roger will react with disbelief tomorrow.

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PostPosted: Thu Apr 05, 2018 4:00 am Reply with quoteBack to top

Roger accuses Archie of lying about not receiving the money, out of greed:

Quote:
And now your blaming poor Mr Hilts again! Why are you acting like this? Of coarse Mr Hilts sent the money! He told me worked very hard to make sure that money could get to you, even though you waisted a bunch of time by not explicating anything properly. He even showed me the slip! What more prove do you want?

No Archie, I think you received the money just fine. But now you're gotten greedy and your pretending you didn't received it, so that you can trick me into sending more! It really is all about the money with you, isn't it?

Well, if it's the money you want, I promised you that after you complete the ceremony we would send you the bake sale money and the Church grant, and I meant it. May be you don't even deserve the money anymore with the way your acting, but a promise is a promise. Unlike you, I don't go back on my Word once I give it out.


Archie protests that he didn't receive it:

Quote:
I didn't see any money. Go and ask your greedy banker.

I did not receive any money.

If you really want to send money, withdraw the cash. Take it to another bank to send.

Or send it through western union or money gram.


Roger protests about why he needs to send it that way:

Quote:
What nonsense are you talking about? Mr Hilts said you received the money with no problems! So why are you saying you didn’t received it? And why are you calling him greedy? He is an honest banker and I think your been very rude.

Also why are you asking me to send the money again? And why are you asking me to send it threw western union or money gram? You know I can't use those! I am banned from western union, remember? And those crooks at money gram steeled my money! So why would I ever go back their?


We'll see what he says. This must be so frustrating for him.


Meanwhile, Archie is not pleased with Hilts:

Quote:
You are a fucking bastard.


Hilts insults him back:

Quote:
And your a goddam moron and a dipshit. In stead of doing one last simple thing and getting a fuckton of cash from the church idiots, you’d rather be lazy, call me names, and stay poor. Stupid.

Well, that’s your choice. I’m gonna do what I need to do to still get this cash. Don’t say I didn’t warn you.


I'm happy to trade insults back and forth with Archie for as long as he continues responding. But it may take a while to get him to do anything interesting again.

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Mr. Labowski
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PostPosted: Fri Apr 06, 2018 1:09 am Reply with quoteBack to top

Quote:
When you send me the money mail I will complete the ceremony.


Nope.

Quote:
I'm sorry my son, the Elders will not agree to that. The ceremony must be completed. You must become a true, full member of the Church before any funds will be sent. Your continuous demands for money are not looked upon positively by the Elders.

Pastor Moses

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PostPosted: Fri Apr 06, 2018 10:04 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

Archie is very frustrated that Roger doesn't understand what happened to the $20,000:

Quote:
Roger or whatever you call yourself, I said I didn't receive any money are you too dumb to understand? What is wrong with your fucking brain?

What is wrong with all of you? (Oh, so many things...)

If you are really want me to join your church, go to the bank and get cash out send it to me

Hilts is nothing but a stupid 419eater I guess you too.

I think I have been foolish enough to understand this whole shit.

So if you are not going to send any money, get the fuck off my mail.


Roger chides him for his cursing and greed:

Quote:
Now your being rude and using cursive language against me again! Why do you always act like this? To think you were trying to blame the filthy language on Mr Hilts when this is how you talk to me!

Also, why are you demanding more money like that? Pastor Moses is getting very upset with how your treating the Church as if its some social club that your joining and all you want is the money that you get for the membership. I already sent you the $20,000.00 dollars you asked for, and now you want more cause your not satisfied? The Elders do not look kindly on that, you know. This is a serious Church, and our first duty and concern should always be for the Old Gods, not for some small amount of money.

And if it's more money you want, I really don't understand why you wouldn't just finish the membership?! I told you, rite after you complete the precess by doing the initiation ceremony, we will give you everything you deserve! So why are you refusing to do that? Your just not making any since!


Archie is annoyed that Roger keeps saying he received the money:

Quote:
Don't you ever say that again.
I did not receive any money from you or Hilts.


And I have told you that I will communicate with you on this mail anymore. If you can't call my phone stop messaging me.


Roger will ask him what he's talking about when he responds.

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Mr. Labowski
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PostPosted: Fri Apr 06, 2018 10:10 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

Quote:
Hilts is nothing but a stupid 419eater



Ah yes, a reminder that he found out we were a "circuit of psychological derail bastards" several months back, yet here he is still taking abuse from us. Very Happy

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PostPosted: Fri Apr 06, 2018 10:42 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

Great job getting him back on the hook! I am not sure if this is a possibility, but it would be hilarious if Hilts were to call him and insult him for his stupidity. If anything, it would get him to believe in everything a bit more, and if he insists on more phone calls, then you can refuse them because he was wasting your time. That would be a beautiful dilemma for him.

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PostPosted: Sat Apr 07, 2018 9:23 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

^^That would actually be pretty fun. I would love to do it. Something to consider if we can't get him to move forward.

For now, Archie is back to demanding phone calls from Pastor Moses:

Quote:
If that is the case, I guess this is where we will end our communication.
If you want to hear from me call my phone. +234<>.


Pastor Moses asks him why he acts like this.

Quote:
We have spoken many times my son, why do you always act so childish like this when you do not get your way?

Honestly I have never had a convort to the church that was so sensitive and a whiny like you are my son. You seem to always be upset and never appreciate all that this church has done for you. Why do you complain all the time? It is really uncalled for and seems very strange considering how close you are to completing your membership.

Pastor Moses

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Big X
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PostPosted: Fri Apr 20, 2018 2:45 am Reply with quoteBack to top

Roger doesn't understand what happened to the money he sent:

Quote:
What on the Old Gods' green Earth are you talking about? If you didn't received the money I sent, than what happened to it? I saw my bank statement, the rite amount of money was dedicated from my account. Mr Hilts showed me the transfer payment slip cause you said you needed to incest I bother him for it, and the rite amount was on their too! So how can you say you didn't received the money? What else could of happened to it?

Please Archie, I don't understand why you want to waist this much of everybody's time. You have been complaining about not receiving money for two months, but if you had just completed the initiation ceremony like we asked, you would of already received everything you deserve by now, and Saved your immoral soul too! So what is stopping you from completing this simple ceremony and finishing your membership? You said it yourself, it isn't very hard to complete. Can you please just go ahead and do it?


Archie claims he is more credible than Hilts:

Quote:
Didn't I send you the mail that Mr Hilts sent to me saying that he will take the money that you asked him to send to me? Now I am telling you that I didn't receive any money you did not believe me. Who are to believe, me who is a step away from becoming a member of the old church Gods or Mr Hilts who is Heathen unbeliever.

I swear before the pyramid that I built that I didn't not receive any money from Mr Hilts or the church.

Like I have said, I will not proceed on this until you send me money. $20,000.

Withdraw the cash from the bank and go send it in another bank.

That way I will complete the ceremony.


Roger isn't buying that:

Quote:
What nonsense are you talking about? You didn’t sent me any mail like that, you just sent me one where your using all kinds of foul cursive language and you were calling me names!

Mr Hilts is not a member of the Church, that is true. But I have known him for almost 15 years, and he has never lied to me or stirred me wrong. You mite almost be a member of the Church, but your not one yet. In fact, the only thing keeping you from being a full member is that you refuse to do the ceremony!

So why don’t you just do the ceremony in stead of rudely demanding that I send you more money?


Archie gets frustrated with Roger again:

Quote:
I am done with you. Don't message me. You have nothing good to offer me.


Roger asks what has gotten into Archie:

Quote:
What do you mean we have nothing good to offer you? Don't be ridiculous, of coarse we do! We are offering you membership in the One True Church! Doesn't saving your immoral soul matter to you at all?

I just don't understand you, Archie. You told us you were so exited and you have did all this hard work to join our Church, but than at the last step, when you only have one more thing to do to become a member, you suddenly decided you didn't wanted to do it any more. What happened? Did Satin corrupted you and turned you away from the Old Gods? I honestly can't think of any other explication of why your acting like this.

Please tell me what is going on, I want to understand.


Archie says he will send someone to Roger's house:

Quote:
The only thing going on right now is that you should send me a your house address. I am sending someone to come visit you. So you can give him the money on cash.


Roger's address doesn't exist, so this is fine by me:

Quote:
Who are you sending to my house? Are you sure it is someone you can trust with that much in cash?

My address is <snip> Jacksonville Florida. When should I expect this person to come?


Let's see what he says. Of course, Roger will berate him for wasting even more time after nobody shows up to the fake address.

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PostPosted: Fri Apr 20, 2018 12:46 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

He should have some interesting excuses, anyway...

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PostPosted: Thu Apr 26, 2018 12:48 am Reply with quoteBack to top

Roger prodded Archie a couple times after his "friend" didn't show up:

Quote:
What is going on? You said you would send someone to my house to pick the cash, and I have been waiting at home but nobody has come. I have better things to do, you know! Why do you want to waist my time like this?

Who is this person your sending, and when will they come to see me?


Quote:
What is going on? You said your friend would come to pick the money from me but I haven’t seen anybody yet! And when I ask you when their coming, you’ve gone totally silence! Why are you acting like this? (I think I have a pretty good idea why. It has to do with a pointless trip to Niger and a giant sandbag pyramid Twisted Evil )

You don’t say anything to me, you don’t respond to my emails asking for information, and Pastor Moses said your not talking to him neither. Why, your not even saying anything more about finishing your Church membership by doing the ceremony like you promised you would after I sent the money! I am so confused about all this! What has happened?


I've been careful to have Roger consistently act as if he thinks he sent the money Archie asked for. It must be driving him crazy that Roger doesn't believe him, even after he provided seemingly ironclad proof of Hilts's malfeasance.

Archie claims his mule is away right now:

Quote:
She's out of town. She will be coming back by Friday. When she comes I will tell her to come see you.


I'm curious to see what excuse he comes up with after that. Roger will have more questions about the identity of the mule when he responds.

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Mr. Labowski
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PostPosted: Thu Apr 26, 2018 11:10 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

I hadn't heard from Archie in 2 weeks, but he finally comes crawling back. I love how, as much as he wants to drop us, he just can't seem to do it. All the work he's put in over the past year really must be eating at him. Very Happy

Quote:
Hello pastor, I have told you that I am not going to complete the membership ceremony until the church sends me money for my villagers.

You seem not to understand what's going on in my community. And for Mr Roger claiming that he sent money to me. He lied about it. I did receive any money from him. His banker must defraud him and lied to him that he sent money to me.

If I have received money from either of you, I wouldn't be bothering you about money. I would have gone ahead to complete the membership ceremony.

So please be kind to me, all I am asking for is $20,000 to the project that you promise my community.

And all be fine


Moses wasn't privy to the dealings with Hilts, but I will ignore that for now.

Quote:
Hello my son,

I have not heard from you in over 2 weeks now and I know that it has been some time since you have written to Brother Roger as well. I do not understand why you go away for so long and then come back with your demands? This is not the way that a convort is supposed to be acting towards the Church.

It saddens me to tell you that the Elders have all but given up on you. Brother Roger and myself continue to hold out hope that you will comply with the rules of the Church and you will complete your membership fully just as all members are required, but your continuous demands for money are very concerning to me my son.

If you chose not to do the ceremony... that is your choice. It brings me great sadness. But just as it was your decision to join our glorious church in the first place, it is also your decision not to complete your final stage. If this is your choice, it will sadden all of us, particular Brother Roger whom has been your biggest support since the beginning of your journey Considering this would be the final step toward becoming a full member, we are all very confuse at you for your refusal to do it. But it is your choice my son.

The only thing preventing us from sending $20,000 and much more for the establishment of a new church in your village is you, yourself and your choices. I will prey to the Old Gods that you will make the right choice by completing your ceremony.

Pastor Moses


He really has no options left. This stubborn fool needs to prepare for his ceremony...

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PostPosted: Fri Apr 27, 2018 1:38 am Reply with quoteBack to top

Twisted Evil Laughing Twisted Evil

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PostPosted: Fri Apr 27, 2018 4:15 am Reply with quoteBack to top

Mr. Labowski wrote:
Hello my son,

I have not heard from you in over 2 weeks now and ...

Wow, what a beautiful message! I'm sure he will do the ceremony. Laughing Laughing Laughing

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PostPosted: Tue May 01, 2018 2:15 am Reply with quoteBack to top

Roger asks Archie about the mule:

Quote:
But you still haven't explicated, who is this person your sending? You didn't told me anything about her at all! Doesn't she have a name? And are you sure you can trust her to handle this money?

Also, you still never told me, what happened to the $20,000.00 dollars I sent you before? What did you spent it on that you need more money already? And why can't you just complete the ceremony? This is all getting me so confused!


Archie swears that he didn't receive anything from Roger:

Quote:
With all due respect sir, please I didn't receive any money from Mr Hilts. I swear by the old God's. I swear to with the monument of faith that I built. I swear by my Parents grave that I didn't not receive any money from Mr Hilts.
I have told you this severally but you didn't believe me. Go to Mr Hilts and tell him to show you from his computer when he sent the money.

Please stop saying that you sent me money.
I have told you to call me but you refused. It would have been easier to communicate.
But you blame me for not being able to use a phone. I laugh on your incompetence. (and we laugh at your stupidity)

Please stop playing prank with me.


Roger still doesn't understand what happened to the money:

Quote:
But that doesn't make any since! I did sent the money, and it was dedicated from my account! Mr Hilts even showed me the receipt, just like you asked. So what could of happened to the money if you didn't received it? It couldn't just disappear!

I am not playing any pranks. Your phone is always switched off or not connecting when I try to call. And you can never seem to call me, even though I gave you my number and nobody else has had a problem calling me. This is so confusing!


I will ask about the mule again once he responds.

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PostPosted: Tue May 01, 2018 2:27 am Reply with quoteBack to top

He says that he laughs on Roger's incompetence? What sort of thing is that to say to someone? How rude!

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PostPosted: Tue May 01, 2018 1:03 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

Roger is incontinent? That explains so much.

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PostPosted: Tue May 01, 2018 4:04 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

^ Only in the mornings.

But of course, that is when he usually emails Archie. Very Happy

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PostPosted: Fri May 04, 2018 4:06 am Reply with quoteBack to top

Archie sounds frustrated again:

Quote:
It's really confusing, and I so tired of this whole situation. (Exactly the effect I'm going for)

I once told you go meet a young person who can help you set up whatsapp on your home.

I think what we need is another way of communicating. Plus you have stop trusting Mr Hilts.

I am in need of money to help my community, also church of the old Gods must be built in my community. Plus the gold business which is what brought us together.

You need to figure out how you will send cash to me me.


Roger ignores all of that, and urges Archie to finish the membership so they can do the gold deal:

Quote:
I think all our problems are happening cause your not a member of the Church. Pastor Moses did warned me that the Old Gods would not smile upon our business if I was working with a heathen unbeliever, remember? And he was rite! That is why we wanted to delay our gold business in the first space! I knew this nonsense like this would happen!

And now your complaining that I am delaying the gold deal? How can you say that? Your the one who is causing the delay by refusing to do the ceremony! That is the last step of the membership precess, and once you do that, than we can be free to do the gold deal with the Old Gods blessing! So what is stopping you from doing it?


This is a test of willpower, and we will win. He will eventually cave and do the ceremony. Though I must say, I expected him to fold long before this.

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PostPosted: Sat May 05, 2018 10:34 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

He tries to be a tough guy:

Quote:
I have told you that I am not going to complete the membership ceremony until the church sends me money.

I believe I am clear on that


Moses assures him he will not get any money if he doesn't.

Quote:
Hello my son,

Then you are not a full member of the church. And therefore you will not be receiving any money from the church. I hope I am clear on that.

I pray that you think of the villagers and your immoral soul before you make your decision. We are all dismayed at how you would be so nearly finished, yet you stop now? It seems very strange to all of us. You could do such good with the money from the church, but without a full membership you will never receive it.

Pastor Moses

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PostPosted: Sun May 06, 2018 8:10 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

He told Roger the same thing:

Quote:
I have told you that I am not going to complete the membership ceremony until the church sends me money.

You have to figure out how to get money across to me.

I need this money money.


Roger will continue to hold firm. If he really needs the money, he will eventually do what we asked.

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PostPosted: Sun May 06, 2018 9:06 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

It's just distressing to see Archie arguing with what is clearly the will of the, er, old gods.

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PostPosted: Mon May 07, 2018 1:33 am Reply with quoteBack to top

He must be torn between just dropping all of this shit but also thinking about all the wasted effort

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PostPosted: Mon May 07, 2018 11:20 am Reply with quoteBack to top

I’m glad I’ve never played you at poker, Big X; you would be a very tough opponent! Smile

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