Archie Fails to Join the Church of the Old Gods

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Posted: Fri Dec 01, 2017 12:16 am

I sense the creation of a new sig icon...

Posted: Fri Dec 01, 2017 12:34 am

Quote:

I vote Mr L gets the "Psychological Derail Bastard" Eater Tag

Why not Mr L and Big X? It's a shame that this bait has probably come to an end, but it was great while it lasted. Great job!

Posted: Fri Dec 01, 2017 3:44 am

^ That is a hilarious lad quote, but I rather like my current one. It was bestowed on me by my first long term lad, John Well, when he rumbled me.

Baiting Guru Joined: 19 Sep 2013 Posts: 2210

^Definitely the funniest things I have been called by a lad. Very Happy

Uzumbo and Dikembe continue to enjoy their cash....

Quote:

GOOD DAY BRODA!!

U NOT BEING NICE WE AR FAIR AN OFFER TO SEND U SOM MONEE BUT U SHOW US GREAT DISREPECT WHY?? WE TAK UR MONEY TO NIGHTCLUB IN ABIDJAN AN BUY BEST DRINK EXPENSIV LIQURE AND ALL TANKS TO YOU BRODA!!! DIKEMBE HAV LOT OF FUN LAS NIGHT HE BUY DRINK FOR MANY LADY AN BRING THEM BAK TO OUR HOTEL ROOM WE PLAY FUN NAKED GAMES AN DIKEMBE SHOW THEM HIS VOODOO CHARM EVRYONE LOV DIKEMBE VERY FUN GUY OK?? WE WONDERING IF U NO BEST PLAC WE CAN SELL ELECTRONICS BECUSE IT SEEM LIKE THERE LLOTS OF GOOD TINGS IN HERE VERY EXPENCIVE ITEMS WE WANT TO GET BEST PRICE WEN WELL SELL THEM BUT CASH IS EASY TO SPEND EVRYBODY LIK CASH OK???

ONE LUV

Elite Baiter Joined: 28 Mar 2015 Posts: 1916

Brilliant bait, sad derailment. But, have you naughty guys got nothing better to do than play childish tricks on serious, hardworking African (in this case) businessmen? You should be ashamed of yourselves. Shocked

Baiting Guru Joined: 25 Jul 2017 Posts: 2107

Many years in the future, Archie's grandchildren will wonder why each morning he hobbles out of the village to sit on a worn and dirty concrete bench and stare at a pile of rubble and mumble to himself. He will raise a shaking fist into the air and punch at seemingly nothing, feebly yelling something about "derail bastards". The children will be hushed and warned never to speak of this, never to ask questions, but to quietly accept their grandfather and his quirks without comment.
All that the younger generation will know is that something really bad happened in a far away place called Niamey.

Posted: Fri Dec 01, 2017 12:49 pm

Archie still has a shred of belief, and he wants proof of good faith from Roger:

Quote:

Go on the Internet and search on Google (419 eaters Moses Malone, Roger and Archie) you will see every of our emails on the website.

I refuse to believe that you are real as you claim.

There's is only one way that will make me believe you and might consider continue communicating with you.

If you have a son or anyone that knows how to use the Internet very well around you, go to him tell him/her to her you download and install whatsapp on your phone.

He should also use your phone to take a video of you saying that you are Roger berllette and that you are real as you claim.

Send the video to me so I can see, else our communication will be terminated.

I have invested alot of my time talking to you (he certainly has) about business and religion. But I get From you and your church brothers is betrayal.

Go do what I ask you before I can continue talking to you in proper language.

He might as well be speaking a foreign language. Roger is technologically illiterate, doesn't know how to Google, and doesn't own a cell phone. He will be very confused when he responds.

Meanwhile, Hilts has heard from Roger that Archie is acting crazy, and reaches out with his usual level of concern:

Quote:

Dude, what the fuck is going on over their? Roger came into my bank this morning, saying you flipped your shit and went crazy after coming back from your goddam vacation. (I'm sure he will enjoy it being referred to as a vacation) I couldn't believe what he was telling me. He said you don't wanna join the church anymore and your saying ridiculous shit about all of them.

Let me ask you something: What the fuck is wrong with you? Are you seriously backing out on me now? When we're so close to getting into the church accounts? What an asshole! Now I gotta find another son of a bitch scammer to work with, and that could take months! Maybe that's not all bad though, because I'm sure any fucker out their would be a hell of a lot smarter then your dumb ass.

If he responds like I hope, Hilts will seed the idea that Eater is a hacker forum and try to increase his self-doubt.

Posted: Fri Dec 01, 2017 2:06 pm

... tussle continues as another thread qualifies for "eaters' greatest hits" Rolling Eyes

Posted: Fri Dec 01, 2017 6:53 pm

Roger is concerned for Archie’s mental health:

Quote:

Archie, I don't understand what has got in you, have you been drinking? Why are you acting crazy like this and talking about betrayal? Who betrayed you?

In any case, you know I am not very good with the technicalities! I don't know how to use the Goggle. Can you just show me this 419 eaters thing your talking about that has all our emails? Cause rite now I have no idea what your talking about.

Also, how am I suppose to get this what app thing or do a video like you want? I don't have a cell phone like all the kids do these days, I just have my home phone, which your refusing to call! So what do you want me to do?

Lads love it when you accuse them of being drunk.

Archie is insistent on getting phone contact with Roger:

Quote:

Go and meet a younger person and use his/her phone to do.

I trusted you but you made me look like a fool.

If you have a wife or son who lives with you in your home.

Give me their cell phone numbers, I need to get across to you.

I will not not take any more excuse from you.

You have to prove to me that you are real human and not a ghost.

Roger will deny some more tomorrow.

Meanwhile, Archie details his misery in Niamey for Hilts:

Quote:

You all are fake ass. I spent all my savings and traveled over 1852 miles away from my country. I spent 26hours traveling on the road to niamey when I got there. The company is no where to be found. The company doesn't exist in niamey in that country.

I went to the country's Co operate affairs office where all businesses and companies in the country are registered under the government. The company that the church claim that they sent the package to doesn't exist there.

I searched on Google map I couldn't find it. I walked the entire district for 3 days. The company doesn't exist.

I message Roger and his fucking Pastor to inform about the shit that they have done. But they pretend they don't know the conspiracy that is going on.

The so-called shipping company doesn't have a phone number that I can call to find out how I can reach them.

They keep mailing that they will get in touch, after 3days of waiting. I left and traveled back to my country.

The fucking company driver uzombo started mailing me that he has opened my package and taken everything in there.

I told him to fuck off.

Meanwhile, I think you are part of this foolish and childish game.

If this has been prank, I guess you guys won.

So I plead that you let me be, no more business between me and Roger.

Neither am I joining a church with fake address and members.

Before you go, search on the Internet 419 eaters. You will see every of our emails between you and I and Pastor Moses and Roger.

It's over.

Hilts tells him he’s being paranoid:

Quote:

Dude, what fucking paranoid ass bullshit are you talking about? I think your losing your goddam mind. Listen, I don’t give a fuck about that stuff with the package you were trying to get. That’s not my business. I told you to forget about that bullshit and focus on getting access to the church accounts, but you chose to do something else. If it got fucked up because you relied on those church idiots to get it right, that’s on you. If you’d just listened to me, this would be better. That’s all I got to say about that.

Also, what the fuck are you talking about with pranks? I don’t play pranks, I make money. I don’t have the time to waist playing pranks. You ever heard of something called the profit motive? Everything I do, it’s to make money. So I got no reason to fuck with you, because it doesn’t make me a goddam penny.

And what are you babbling about with this 419 eaters? That sounds familiar, and I think I’ve heard of that before, but I can’t quite place it. Your telling me our emails are on their? You gotta link to that shit?

Whatever, dude. You gotta get your shit together and focus on the big score. Right now you sound like a fucking punk ass bitch whining about how your life sucks. Well suck it up, princess, and get on with the job.

I’m sure he’ll love that.

Baiting Guru Joined: 19 Sep 2013 Posts: 2210

Moses encourages him to sober up:

Quote:

My son,

What is going on with you? I don't understand you messages to me. Roger fears that you may have fallen prey to drunkenness and other wickedness. My son, I must warn you that this is not condoned by the Old Gods. Drinking and other sinful behavior may be a simple way to feel better but this is only a short term solution. I urge you in the name of the Old Gods to stop harming yourself with this wickedness.

I understand that you had a difficult journey collecting the Welcome Package. Perhaps this was a test put upon you by the Gods, in much the same way that Barnabas wandered the desert for 14 days and 14 nights on his way to Jerusalem? My son, it is at these difficult times that you must keep your faith strong.

I urge you to sober yourself and get a rest. After a day of rest, write to me and try to explain more clearly what is going on in a way that makes sense to me.

Pastor Moses

Posted: Fri Dec 01, 2017 10:21 pm

He probably wanted to say "Circle of Con Artist Bastards" but "Cycle of Psychological Derail Bastards" sounds way better.

Was probably hitting up that Google translate.

Baiting Guru Joined: 19 Sep 2013 Posts: 2210

Archie responds to Pastor Moses by forwarding all of the emails that UZUMBO sent to him over the past week.

Quote:

The above mails was sent to me by the driver of the non existing company that you and your cohorts use in sending a non existing welcome package to a wrong address instead of the address that I gave you.

I believe that you all part of this conspiracy. I built faith monument Gods. And betrayal is what I get on return. I spent my savings and on a trip to Niger Republic hoping to come back happy. But reverse was the case Very Happy

, I want grossly disappointed by what I found out. The company you and Eric use in sending a non existing package doesn't exist in Niamey Niger Republic. I spent 3days walking the entire city but nobody has ever heard nor seen the company in that country.

When I got to Niamey Niger Republic, I mailed the company to send me the phone number of the regional manager in niamey so I can reach out to him and to tell him that I am in the country.

He never responded until after 24hrs, the so called regional manager did not send his number in other for quick communication.

Instead he sent the fake and non existing driver, the driver didn't send his number as well. They were all using mail. Just like you and your cohorts.

After waiting for, 3days the driver sent the messages that I sent to you earlier. I decided to return to my country.

I went on the Internet to find out more about the originality of your church and all of you that I have been receiving mails from.. And I discovered that all of you are not real as you claim. It might be 1or 2 retarded individuals that is behind this whole situation.. Laughing

Go on 419 eaters.Com, you will find every of our emails on the website.

So, there is a big difference between foolishness and believe.

I thought you are what you said you are.
If this a game I think you have won.

I am going to my community next to destroy the faith monument.

Pastor Moses will continue to be confused by all these accusations and urge him not to harm the monument. He clearly doesn't understand that 419eater is a hacker website used to steal personal information from innocent people like Roger and Pastor Moses.

Posted: Sun Dec 03, 2017 7:32 am

Can we get pictures of the destroyed monument? Lol

Posted: Sun Dec 03, 2017 8:13 am

Mr. Labowski wrote:

It might be 1or 2 retarded individuals that is behind this whole situation..

... I am going to my community next to destroy the faith monument.

Muhahahaha! Laughing

If the idiot pulls down the monument and sends pictures, that's going to be the grand prize of the story! clapping

Posted: Sun Dec 03, 2017 9:14 am

The collossiam lol

Hello I'm New here! Joined: 26 Apr 2010 Posts: 16

Would you wish to invite the wrath of the Old Gods by destroying a sanctified monument? That could really be inviting trouble.

Baiting Guru Joined: 25 Jul 2017 Posts: 2107

I'm sure that in any given population, a certain percentage of individuals would be labeled as "retarded individuals". If this community has only 1 or 2, (as Archie states) I'd say that's pretty good statistically.
The idea of Archie returning from his sabbatical and destroying his faith monument reminds me of Moses returning from the mountain and seeing the golden calf idol, and destroying it. Surely, if ever, his faith is being tested? There must be big things ahead for a man who can overcome such tribulations.

Posted: Sun Dec 03, 2017 2:13 pm

HAHAHAHA

Has Archie finally been psychologically derailed?

I wonder what's going through his head right now, all those forms, those hand written pages, the many wasted hours, the monument, the time and money wasted on a (safari) vacation to Niamey... all for (nil) the entertainment for mad men psychos on the Internet.

Master of Master Baiters Joined: 15 Jan 2010 Posts: 953

Archie has identified us as psychos and retards.
Can't argue with that! Twisted Evil

Fantastic bait everyone. Very Happy

Master of Master Baiters Joined: 21 Nov 2008 Posts: 619

Destruction of the faith monument would be tragic. If it has to happen, it would be nice if he could be convinced to document it with video.

Posted: Sun Dec 03, 2017 8:07 pm

Mr. Labowski wrote:

It might be 1or 2 retarded individuals that is behind this whole situation..

Holy shit, that is hilarious. Laughing

If I had any room in my signature, that would be sig-worthy. As is "Circuit of Psychological Derail Bastards". Archie is just pumping out more and more amusingly quotable lines with every frustrated email he sends. We'll try to keep him responding as long as we can so we can get more.

Posted: Sun Dec 03, 2017 8:14 pm

He already found himself once here and it took me some effort to get him back in track, but he eventually complied with me. The opera ain't over till the fat lady sings, and I'm pretty sure Mr L and Big X can bring him back into action.

Posted: Mon Dec 04, 2017 12:27 am

Lets just hope that the 'Bench Of Admiration' remains intact Crying or Very sad

Posted: Mon Dec 04, 2017 2:47 am

He's probably knocking it down as he doesn't want to be reminded of his stupidity and greed that got him into shit creek in the first place.

Baiting Guru Joined: 19 Sep 2013 Posts: 2210

Moses is quite disturbed by this recent turn of events:

Quote:

My son!

Would you please stop for a moment and just listen to yourself? I fear these words you are using towards me. This is not the words of a believer and I fear what the Elders would think if they heard what you just said to me!

Destruction of the Monument of Faith would be total blasphemy! Not to mention the Bench of Admirations! Just think of the work involved and the time invested in this glorious task! Even to speak of such wickedness disturbs me greatly my son.

These messages you emailed to me.. I do not understand. Are you saying that a delivery driver has stolen the Welcome Package? Well if that has happened then I am sure the Old Gods will give him the judgement that he deserves, but this is no reason I say no reason to destroy the monument! Why would you disgrace your own faith because something bad happened to you? Please I need you to think clearly my son!

I will have Brother Eric take me to the GPS office tomorrow and we will complain to them about the delivery problems. We will figure out how to make this right. My son, talk to Brother Roger and try to understand that he cares for you like a true Brother in the Cloth. Please choose your words carefully. Also realize that this very well could be a test in much the same way that Moses broke the 10 commandments at Mount Sinai don't make the same mistake by harming your Faith Monument there is nothing to be gained from that and only loss if you make such a foolish choice my son. I urge you to sober up and rethink your words. I will try to figure out what is going on here!

Pastor Moses

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