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 Mr Larry and Mr Anthony Fishing Safari (flying to Lagos)

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lighten_up
Wyoming Double Glazed


Joined: 11 Mar 2016
Posts: 367


PostPosted: Fri Jul 01, 2016 2:06 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

Tony and Bob Talk

Reminder
Cast
Baiters:
Bob - Fishing Guide played by me.
Mr Johnson - One of Bob's Rich clients played by OtterFan
Rachel - Mr Larry/Tony Love interest. played by OtterFan see thread here

Lads:
Frank Larry - DHL manager
Mr Anthony/Tony- Nigerian Friend of Larry (Rachel's Love)

A couple days ago Bob Took Anthony/Tony into his confidence.. here is the responses.


Tony wrote:

i acknowledge (Mr RJ just started an email to him this way) the content of your mail is well understood i m 100% to do this with you wader Mr. Larry is in or out i will work with you but i know Mr. Is a Man so i will not like him to see am a disappointed to him because i like to do this job as well i can.

i will do ask you said in your mail to me i like that Sir i will not be a Barring or cause any problem between your relationship with Larry and that can happen and please i will like you to make sure you get Larry some money for his trouble please do as you promise i will like to see you one day. thank you for now.
Tony


A couple days later

Bob wrote:
Hi Tony!

How are you doing? I got your email and glad that we see eye to eye.. This is relief my mind.. Thank you!..

I thought I would let you know that Mr Johnson has taken quite a liking to you.. I think he sees a little of his younger self in him.. That is great new for you.. I would advice you that you should do all you can to keep that relationship building.. Let me just say he has taken good care of me over the years.. ha.. well just trying to help..

I haven't had any update from Larry in a while.. How is the trip planning going? I told Larry yesterday that Mr Johnson is Chomping at the bit about getting this trip planned.. Please keep the report and pics coming.. Please check with Larry and see if we can get somethign today!

Bob



If you notice Tony is learning to speak/type english much better ask Bob asked Larry to ask him to do better Laughing

Tony wrote:

Thank you Sir. I yes I m keep my word and I am working hard to bring everything to completion I want to travel to East like I said earlier I get sum location there I believe Mr.Larry will could have told you that? Once I get there you will receive any area I capture thank you Mr Goss. Just Tell Mr. About my movement I also told him.

Anthony


_________________
Lighten UP!!

Safari x 15 Closed lad accounts x 54
Long Walk Closed lad accounts x 54
___________________
Your epileptic in constant response at this 11th hour is quite unfortunate.

Bob -- Is me Mr. Spock ...
Do not send any money to Feathers otherwise he will kill you in your dreams --

: My Hebrew Translator say name it like ASS CREAM PONG. Correct?
Lad: With this insult for my surname i know that you will not have any respect for me

You know you are a cheat. so all that you say is nonsense. What you didn't know is that i know you are fraud

Last edited by lighten_up on Sat Jul 09, 2016 5:12 am; edited 1 time in total
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lighten_up
Wyoming Double Glazed


Joined: 11 Mar 2016
Posts: 367


PostPosted: Fri Jul 01, 2016 2:19 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

Latest Conversation between BOB and LARRY (DHL guy)

Where is our update????

BOB wrote:
Larry,

Do you have an update for me and Mr Johnson ? He is turning up the pressure on me (and your and Tony)..

Please get back to me ASAP!

Btw.. Rebecca showed me a thing called google chat.. Do you know how to use that?

Your brother and friend


Larry wrote:

he(Tony) told me that the area he got wasn't good like i told you is plain to go this week by then we will be get result from him by next week and he told me that he speck with Mr. Johnson is aware of his travel.


Continue to lay ground work for next week

bob wrote:
Larry.

This is not working. That is terrible news. What am I supposed to tell Mr Johnson. ?? He sent me an email this morning that he wants a report. My Friend, it should not take this long. This is going on over a month now!!!

Let me see if Mr Johnson is willing to wait until next week. Let me ask are you saying -- Monday of Next week or Friday of next week?

Do you have a list of places Tony has checked out so far? Maybe I can hold Mr Johnson off with that but honestly I doubt it.

Get back with me soon.

Bob



Larry wrote:

surely that will be before Friday that will be done because his prospering for that you is too far from the state so tell him that will be beforeFriday we will get confirmation pictures from Anthony. yes i am sure of that


So we start talking with Hangout. after missing each other and "hi" and "Hello" I get


Quote:
Larry:EVERYTHING WILL BE OVER BY NEXT WEEK
I feel like this is from assassin bait Very Happy

Bob:Becca tells me your yelling at me with ALL CAPS.. Are you upset?

Larry:no i m not upset my Brother upset for what ?
Bob:That is great news.. thank you.. I will tell Becca!. ha

Larry: haha u are really in love Twisted Evil



I might be slow updating next week .. I'm on holiday.. OFan will keep it going. I'm sure!!

_________________
Lighten UP!!

Safari x 15 Closed lad accounts x 54
Long Walk Closed lad accounts x 54
___________________
Your epileptic in constant response at this 11th hour is quite unfortunate.

Bob -- Is me Mr. Spock ...
Do not send any money to Feathers otherwise he will kill you in your dreams --

: My Hebrew Translator say name it like ASS CREAM PONG. Correct?
Lad: With this insult for my surname i know that you will not have any respect for me

You know you are a cheat. so all that you say is nonsense. What you didn't know is that i know you are fraud
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Otterfan
Baiting Guru


Joined: 14 Mar 2007
Posts: 2481
Location: UK -- land of otters and non-otters


PostPosted: Thu Jul 07, 2016 10:43 am Reply with quoteBack to top

A small update from our lad, Tony, and Mr Johnson. Things are going slowly at the moment because we're waiting for the week beginning the 11th when both Rachel and Bob are in our plans to appear in Lagos. Until then, however, we have a week of nothing-much...

Mr Johnson wrote:
Tony!

What's going on with your world, my good man! I hope all is good and ticking along fine.

How has your latest trip been? Where is your report, your photos? Or are you still out there, gathering those fantastic facts for me?

Anyway, all that aside for the minute, let me tell you that I am getting itchy feet over here. I am getting more and more restless in my office, and I desperately want this trip to happen TODAY! Although that's not possible, I realise, I do want it to happen as soon as possible, and I must say that as I see things right now, this is not going to happen, is it, Tony? Come on, son, admit it to yourself and God above, this is a job that's not going to happen in our lifetimes, I feel.

But I have no desire to get angry with you, my good friend. You're a decent fellow and I want to keep us talking and capable of a chinwag at the drop of a hat. So I tell you what... I'll recruit that splendid chap, Bob Goss. He knows what I like and what works for me, So I'm going to see if he's up for a spin out to Nigeria! Nothing bad on you, sir, but when a job needs to be done, it's always right to send the right bloke the get it done.

You're still my man on the ground, Tony, but sometimes the needs press the grapes to the still before the yeast, if you know what I mean!

I'll keep you abreast of what's going on.

regards,
RJ


The idea is that we want to send Bob Goss to Nigeria to speed things up, while also carrying Larry/Tony's expenses.

Tony wrote:
Good day Sir. I am good just only working to get results which I send you the pictures a short time Sir thank you I m grateful to be apart to you thankyou once again.


Mr Johnson wrote:
Tony, my good man!

Looking forward to your photos and thoughts on the area you researched for me!
Remember to make a note of the expenses you used for this trip, and I will add it to the amount you will be paid when this job is finished.

I'm thinking of giving Bob Goss the expenses you've used so far, and he can then hand them over to you when he visits. I think he might be planning on arriving in your splendid country early next week.

So, with that said, complete another expenses form so my man, Lehmann, is happy, and I will make sure Mr Goss brings everything you are owed. Plus, of course, a nice bonus for being such a wonderfully amenable chap!

regards,
RJ


For anyone following the Rachel/Tony bait, it might start to become clear that both Rachel and Bob G are going to be flying to Lagos on approximately the same day. One is carrying money, the other is carrying something more intimate and private; both are things that Tony desires.

Tony wrote:
Sir I received you wonderful word here is the pictures and I locked one our to area tomorrow thank you Sir I appreciate you are kind to me. Thank


Pictures!

Checking the EXIF data on these pics (the lad has GPS switched on, recording the precise location the picture was taken), puts these at 6.359921 N, 6.858498 E. Some piece of wilderness in Nigeria, north of Port Harcourt, when checked on a map.

Image

Image

Image

Image

Image

Image

Rather uninspiring pictures, to be honest, but they prove the lad got out of his chair and did some work for us.

Now... if we take the EXIF data from the lad's previous pictures that he sent to Rachel ( 6.590946 N, 3.297404 E) back in February, and assume this is either his home or not far from his home, and put the two locations into Google Maps to calculate the distance, it comes to 243 km (or a 486km round trip). Safari worthy?

Mr Johnson wrote:
Tony, my good fellow!

What amazing pictures! Splendid, just splendid! They look like the kind of place I want to spend some time in, just me, some sturdy chaps who know their stuff, and our wits and knowledge. What a marvellous time we're going to have!

I have briefed Bob Goss about his upcoming trip. He's not going to supplant you and your excellent work, Tony, don't worry about that! Instead, he is going to come over and just attend to the small details that he knows I like and that would take too much time for me to explain completely to you. You are still my main man on the ground, Tony!

Okay, again, thanks for the pictures. They have got me salivating at the thought of being there, and I can't wait to be there for real!

regards,
RJ

_________________
PARVA QVOQVE PARS ESSENTIAE LVTRAE SVPERARI NON POTEST
Pith Helmet 10 VcameraVcamera
Closed lad accounts South AfricaUnited KingdomEuropean UnionUnited Kingdom
"I have to sale something now to be able to drink water." -- Alice Idris on safari in Cotonou
"why did you waste my time like this why." -- US Army Captain William D Swenson
Hello Kitty! <--TS certified.

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Otterfan
Baiting Guru


Joined: 14 Mar 2007
Posts: 2481
Location: UK -- land of otters and non-otters


PostPosted: Thu Jul 07, 2016 11:50 am Reply with quoteBack to top

And he comes back with more pictures!

Tony wrote:
Thank you Sir. Here is another pic and for the obudo mountain resort. I made the research he is tourist center.

here is the new area I got thank you I appreciate your words to me .
Tony


I know it's a tourist centre, oh I know very much what Obudu is!
Would he be willing to go there? That's a question for a later day.

More pictures...

Image

Image

Image

Image

Image

Image

Image

Image

Image

Image

Image

Image

Any more? I hope not.

Mr Johnson wrote:
Tony, you wonderful fellow!

Your work continues to amaze me, it truly does! So many pictures, so much work!

You mention Obudu Mountain Resort and say it's a tourist centre. Are you recommending it? I've had my eye on the place for a long time, ever since Bob Goss went to Cameroon, had his chimpanzee adventure, and heard all about it. Is there any way my Man On The Ground (as I think of you now!) can get some more information for me? First hand information, not just information I can find myself on the internets? It's fine and dandy if you can't but keep this request in your mind, please do, my fine fellow!

regards,
RJ

_________________
PARVA QVOQVE PARS ESSENTIAE LVTRAE SVPERARI NON POTEST
Pith Helmet 10 VcameraVcamera
Closed lad accounts South AfricaUnited KingdomEuropean UnionUnited Kingdom
"I have to sale something now to be able to drink water." -- Alice Idris on safari in Cotonou
"why did you waste my time like this why." -- US Army Captain William D Swenson
Hello Kitty! <--TS certified.

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Todarobrontolon
Master Baiter


Joined: 06 May 2016
Posts: 115
Location: Inside a glamourous digestive tract


PostPosted: Thu Jul 07, 2016 10:07 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

A photo of him swimming in those marvellous waters is a MUST!

_________________
Closed lad accounts x 70 Vcamera

The donor is ready to do anything possible to make sure he is out of debt he is really ready for any sales of any part of his body,everything has been confirmed and he is ready. - Dr Jackson

Once the money transferred in your account i will come over there and practice your religion together. -Salmara
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lighten_up
Wyoming Double Glazed


Joined: 11 Mar 2016
Posts: 367


PostPosted: Fri Jul 08, 2016 4:28 am Reply with quoteBack to top

I am on vacation but have wifi today.. I have been emailing back and forth with Larry and Tony using my phone..

Here is communication between Bob and Larry and/or Tony as we prepare for Bob's upcoming trip.

From Beginning of week: (4 days ago)

Bob wrote:
Larry and Anthony.

I am writing both of you. I apologize if I have overstepped with including you both. However I think this email is critical and I want no confusion.

I just got another lengthy email from Mr Johnson. He is growing more and more impatient.

Has Mr Johnson given you the. "When I ask for something done I want it done right away or he will find someone who can do it " speech yet? Well he gave it to me again today. I would not be surprised if one or both of you get an email from him also. Don't panic I can handle him.

It's not all bad. He IS pleased with the work Tony had done to date. He just wants it complete so we set a date for his trip and get things in place. I know you said you would be complete this week but he told me if he didn't have this report by Wednesday July 6 then things would have to change. What exactly that means--I'm unsure. I would prefer not to find out. Ha!

So let's be Jonny on he spots and get this thing wrapped up by Wednesday AM. That will give me time to do the other plans and get them to Mr Johnson! Deal?

Please reply this is understood

Talk to you soon

Your brother
Bob

Ps. Rebecca sends her love.


Tony answers.. at 4am his time!

Tony wrote:
Yes tomorrow to Thursday you will received update sure because i just arrived yesterday please tell him that i m working for that like i promise him to working with him everything will update by tomorrow like i said he shouldn't be worrier i traveled here to get what his want so please i am apologize for that my delaying but due to i want to get good result for him thank you Sir.


Bob wrote:
Dear Tony

Hi there my man. I was just shutting down my computer for the night and saw your message. Why are you up so early!

Anyway. You say you just arrived. Where? East Nigeria ? Oh that is fantastic news! Please get me details and lots of pictures. Will you get a chance to check out Obudu Mountain Resort? Mr Johnson will be so pleased. I can't wait to tell him. I will email him right after I send you this note. Man!. That will really fix out wagon! He will be so pleased. You saved the day!

I look forward in hearing from you tomorrow !

Have a great day


a couple days later.

Larry wrote:
Good day Mr.Goss. I have got 2 location now I m moving to some another area I will send you the pictures of the area. Thank you Mr. Anthony

and
Larry wrote:
For the (Obudu Mountain Resort? ) I have confirmed it he is located in Bayelsa State it is a very big Tourist in the State. Thank you will soon send the pic to you soon as


Time to break the NEWS that Bob is coming to Lagos to Larry

Bob wrote:

Larry.

How are you doing. Well the other shoe dropped as I knew it would. Mr Johnson has asked (well more like ordered ) me to come over to Nigeria and get this trip completely planned. I will be arriving in Lagos sometime early next week. I am hoping to arrive Monday July 11th. I would like to meet with Tony (and you if you can get off. - no problem if you can't make it this time). I will plan on staying about 5 days maybe more if needed. Can Tony meet me at the airport? I will need to find a hotel to stay at while in Lagos. I will get with Mr Lenmann to finalize my plans.

Mr Johnson has mentioned me bringing with me some spending money and money to reimburse you and Tony for your experience. Please get with Tony to turn in any expenses he has. He needs to work with Mr Lenmann

Further I will talk to me Johnson about some advances for you and Tony. He doesn't like to do that but I think I can convince him once we show our progress next week. You spoke about fees and licenses. How much should I budget for those fees? Is there a limit of cash I can bring into Nigeria ? $10,000? 20,000? Please find out.

Sorry to be short and to the point but this is throwing me into a tizzy.


I next this this from Tony.. Note I did not send the above message to Tony so "he" does not know about my trip (except RJ has told him).. But point is Tony plays it well.

Tony wrote:
Dear. Sir. I have sent to Mr.johnson an pictures yesterday and i also send the one i got today to did he told you that he recevied my update yesterday? Thank you sir. Tony


Then a couple hours later.

Remember that Larry and Tony are one in the same.. one is white (Larry) and one is black (Tony). Unfortunately Tony has his LOVE (Rachel -- see other thread here) coming at the SAME TIME.. That really sucks for him..

Larry wrote:
Good to hear that but have you discussed this with Anthony? Because he is the one that will welcome you in the airport and his not around you can not just take off without informing him that you are come by the date you said because you know that his not in laggos now. So that you will not be stranded by Anthony. So discussion that with him so that he will the convent time to fixes the date.

please try to reach him early to update him he can know that time you are coming because he told me yesterday about he sickening Mother. Let you plain the date. Thank you my brother. And about the amount I really don know if that have limits amount but I ask to know then I will get back to you.


So per Larry, I "let" Tony in on my plans.

Quote:
Tony!

I sent this to Larry he other day hoping he would coordinate with you. But I think he is passing he buck so to speak. So I have forwarded you the email I sent to him.
(I forwarded the same email I sent to Larry)

In short. I will be arriving next Monday (or Tuesday at the latest ) in Lagos airport to help I the planning of mr Johnsons trip. Please see details below.

I would be much appreciated if you could meet me there. We have a lot to discuss.

Contact me if you have questions


Tony Responds..

Tony wrote:
Dear. Sir. I have received the message you sent I understand it but can cant be next week because I m not in Lagos now and I have issue I have to trite now du my mother illness so please I will figure out then give you any update I want to take him to hospital ???? then know when I will be come back to Lagos.

and for the amount you mentioned you can come with it and do not allowed any body to see it Twisted Evil but I will make enquiries for the.

once I m done with the research because i am still working for it so i need little time to complete very time so that you move on for the coming.


OH NO!.. Next week is bad? Unfortunately Bob is coming anyways..

_________________
Lighten UP!!

Safari x 15 Closed lad accounts x 54
Long Walk Closed lad accounts x 54
___________________
Your epileptic in constant response at this 11th hour is quite unfortunate.

Bob -- Is me Mr. Spock ...
Do not send any money to Feathers otherwise he will kill you in your dreams --

: My Hebrew Translator say name it like ASS CREAM PONG. Correct?
Lad: With this insult for my surname i know that you will not have any respect for me

You know you are a cheat. so all that you say is nonsense. What you didn't know is that i know you are fraud

Last edited by lighten_up on Sat Jul 09, 2016 5:17 am; edited 1 time in total
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Otterfan
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Joined: 14 Mar 2007
Posts: 2481
Location: UK -- land of otters and non-otters


PostPosted: Fri Jul 08, 2016 5:49 am Reply with quoteBack to top

^^^ Mother's illness?

He chatted with Rachel yesterday for a long time, during which she mentioned his mother (about meeting her). No mention of any illness. How surprising!

_________________
PARVA QVOQVE PARS ESSENTIAE LVTRAE SVPERARI NON POTEST
Pith Helmet 10 VcameraVcamera
Closed lad accounts South AfricaUnited KingdomEuropean UnionUnited Kingdom
"I have to sale something now to be able to drink water." -- Alice Idris on safari in Cotonou
"why did you waste my time like this why." -- US Army Captain William D Swenson
Hello Kitty! <--TS certified.

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The Monsignor
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Joined: 08 Nov 2006
Posts: 3221
Location: St Michael's Chapel


PostPosted: Fri Jul 08, 2016 6:34 am Reply with quoteBack to top

Otterfan wrote:
...it comes to 243 km (or a 486km round trip). Safari worthy?
Nice work. I have always believed that the Safari qualification is a minimum of 200 miles (322 km) each way or crossing an international border.
https://forum.419eater.com/forum/viewtopic.php?t=118861

Looking again at the Signature Icons Thread, it does state...
Quote:
The rule for Safaris is 200 miles distance travelled...
...which appears ambiguous. Is this total miles travelled or each way...? Perhaps this could be cleared up by the Forum Administrator.
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Otterfan
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PostPosted: Fri Jul 08, 2016 8:40 am Reply with quoteBack to top

Yes, that is ambiguous. I've added my safari helmet already, but if overruled I'll reluctantly remove it.

_________________
PARVA QVOQVE PARS ESSENTIAE LVTRAE SVPERARI NON POTEST
Pith Helmet 10 VcameraVcamera
Closed lad accounts South AfricaUnited KingdomEuropean UnionUnited Kingdom
"I have to sale something now to be able to drink water." -- Alice Idris on safari in Cotonou
"why did you waste my time like this why." -- US Army Captain William D Swenson
Hello Kitty! <--TS certified.

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MorganleFay
Elite Baiter


Joined: 28 Mar 2015
Posts: 1916


PostPosted: Fri Jul 08, 2016 9:23 am Reply with quoteBack to top

Here's to you getting to keep it, Otterfan and, of course, lighten_up.

I'm now thoroughly intrigued as to how Tony will choose to get out of his bind. Will he go after the holiday with the woman of his heart and risk losing the payout from Mr Johnson's project? Or, will he disappoint Rachel? Will he twist himself inside out trying to accommodate both options?

Pleading his mother's illness looks as if he is going to try to be with Rachel and defer the project. But, will he be be allowed to? Mr Johnson could be most unhappy about the delay.

Also, I wonder if there is an oga in the background dictating the shots?
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Otterfan
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PostPosted: Fri Jul 08, 2016 10:31 am Reply with quoteBack to top

^^^ Events might take a change in his favour! For a while, at least. Not too long.
Actually, not long at all!

_________________
PARVA QVOQVE PARS ESSENTIAE LVTRAE SVPERARI NON POTEST
Pith Helmet 10 VcameraVcamera
Closed lad accounts South AfricaUnited KingdomEuropean UnionUnited Kingdom
"I have to sale something now to be able to drink water." -- Alice Idris on safari in Cotonou
"why did you waste my time like this why." -- US Army Captain William D Swenson
Hello Kitty! <--TS certified.

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Juan Freizwidatt
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PostPosted: Fri Jul 08, 2016 4:43 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

The Monsignor wrote:
I have always believed that the Safari qualification is a minimum of 200 miles (322 km) each way or crossing an international border.


That is correct, and thanks for pointing out that the sticky was ambiguous. That is now corrected.

This is an outstanding bait and I absolutely love it, but sadly it doesn't quite meet the guidelines.

_________________
"SATAN WILL KILL YOU . BECAUSE YOU ARE A DAUGHTER OF MERMAID"

"HOW DOES IT SOUND TO YOU THAT ANOTHER PERSON IS DEALING WITH YOU AND ASK YOU TO CONTACT ANOTHER PERSON AND NOW YOU SAID THAT YOU WANT TO DEAL WITH THE OTHER PERSON WITHOUT THE KNOWING OF THE PERSON THAT ASK YOU TO CONTACT THE OTHER PERSON"

I apologize again that I will lick the dust from your sandals - Shorty

Sand Timer x4: Shorty
Safari x 16:
US lad w/Capone: ( Golden Pith ) Black Ribbon
- ATL>DC>ATL>Vegas>Seattle>ATL>San Diego>LA>ATL>Seattle>ATL>WY>ATL>Aspen>ATL (21K+ miles, $11K+ expenses)
Shorty w/bohigal:
- Lagos>Abidjan
Random lads:
- Douala>Korup; Lagos>Cotonou>Parakou; Cotonou>Niger border; Cotonou>Pendjari>jail in Tanguietta; Asaba>Abuja; Accra>Tamale
Purple Flower Goat Jack Boot Whip
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Otterfan
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PostPosted: Fri Jul 08, 2016 6:37 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

^^^ Okay, fair decision.

We'll have to try harder with him now!

_________________
PARVA QVOQVE PARS ESSENTIAE LVTRAE SVPERARI NON POTEST
Pith Helmet 10 VcameraVcamera
Closed lad accounts South AfricaUnited KingdomEuropean UnionUnited Kingdom
"I have to sale something now to be able to drink water." -- Alice Idris on safari in Cotonou
"why did you waste my time like this why." -- US Army Captain William D Swenson
Hello Kitty! <--TS certified.

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lighten_up
Wyoming Double Glazed


Joined: 11 Mar 2016
Posts: 367


PostPosted: Fri Jul 08, 2016 6:53 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

From The EXIF coordinates I show one of the pics to be outside Onitsha Nigeria.

I show that the distances between Lagos to Onitsha is 283 miles or 6hr 38 mins by car.. I would say that qualifies..

If someone would like to double check me I can send them the coordinates.

Image
Image

So we are good?

However I will remove my pith until Admin can rule on this.

Thanks

_________________
Lighten UP!!

Safari x 15 Closed lad accounts x 54
Long Walk Closed lad accounts x 54
___________________
Your epileptic in constant response at this 11th hour is quite unfortunate.

Bob -- Is me Mr. Spock ...
Do not send any money to Feathers otherwise he will kill you in your dreams --

: My Hebrew Translator say name it like ASS CREAM PONG. Correct?
Lad: With this insult for my surname i know that you will not have any respect for me

You know you are a cheat. so all that you say is nonsense. What you didn't know is that i know you are fraud
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Otterfan
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Joined: 14 Mar 2007
Posts: 2481
Location: UK -- land of otters and non-otters


PostPosted: Fri Jul 08, 2016 8:08 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

Yeah, my original safari estimation should be changed according to what I've just checked on a different computer.

I knew Google searches were unreliable, differing depending on what a person's search history contains, but to make things like this also variable is just stupid.

I'm going to use the old fashioned method and work out the distances on a paper map from now on!

_________________
PARVA QVOQVE PARS ESSENTIAE LVTRAE SVPERARI NON POTEST
Pith Helmet 10 VcameraVcamera
Closed lad accounts South AfricaUnited KingdomEuropean UnionUnited Kingdom
"I have to sale something now to be able to drink water." -- Alice Idris on safari in Cotonou
"why did you waste my time like this why." -- US Army Captain William D Swenson
Hello Kitty! <--TS certified.

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Juan Freizwidatt
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PostPosted: Fri Jul 08, 2016 8:47 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

Looks like 283 miles to me, so keep that hat! Very Happy

_________________
"SATAN WILL KILL YOU . BECAUSE YOU ARE A DAUGHTER OF MERMAID"

"HOW DOES IT SOUND TO YOU THAT ANOTHER PERSON IS DEALING WITH YOU AND ASK YOU TO CONTACT ANOTHER PERSON AND NOW YOU SAID THAT YOU WANT TO DEAL WITH THE OTHER PERSON WITHOUT THE KNOWING OF THE PERSON THAT ASK YOU TO CONTACT THE OTHER PERSON"

I apologize again that I will lick the dust from your sandals - Shorty

Sand Timer x4: Shorty
Safari x 16:
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PostPosted: Fri Jul 08, 2016 9:17 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

Image

More safari hats is good. Congratulations!

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PostPosted: Fri Jul 08, 2016 9:46 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

Well look at that: More pictures!

Lad wrote:
Sir. Like I said that is good for the obudo mountain resort. Is tourist due to the contact I have made but I m still verifying for that. And here is updating pictures.

Anthony.


Image

Image

Image

Image

Image

Image

Image

I notice there's a very strong water theme in all his pictures.

Mr Johnson wrote:
Tony, greetings!

More pictures? Wonderful, just wonderful! I have only just got back in from a very stressful round of golf with some business partners. Ever played a round at St Andrew's, Tony? Finest course in all of the UK, that's what it is. My business partners today, though, were complete buffoons. They couldn't understand a simple one-five transaction with zero specific interest on the drop payment. I mean, seriously, what is wrong with these youngsters, these days, what? They even teach that kind of thing in Harrow, so that shows you how basic it is!
Anyway, I'm still somewhat stressed so I'll take a glance at your pictures later when I'm relaxing with some 1936 Glenfiddich. Lord, that's like pure heaven. Ever tried it, Tony? You ought to! £30,000 a bottle, but worth every penny!

What are your thought on Obudu, my man? I want to experience it. I know it's a tourist centre, and there'll be all those damned greasy foreigners clogging up the place, but I'm thinking that after I've spent two weeks in the wild, perhaps somewhere with all the luxury laid on will be just the ticket to round off the whole trip. What do you say?

Keep up the good work, my man!

regards,
RJ

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PostPosted: Fri Jul 08, 2016 10:17 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

Congratulations. A portion of his travel was on a horrible road. You may suggest that he take the A122 on his way back instead. Its further.

If you are a Nigerian, chances are you know someone who has spent an entire day, at least once, traveling the 140-mile Sagamu-Benin City road, or been killed trying to do so.


More of the story here.

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PostPosted: Fri Jul 08, 2016 10:37 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

Well Done on the Safari, fellas.

I am now much looking forward to another Obudu video.
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lighten_up
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PostPosted: Sat Jul 09, 2016 5:09 am Reply with quoteBack to top

^^^ thank you for all the warm accolades.

update:

Gonzola asks for Tony to file an expense report

Mr Lehmann wrote:
Good day Tony,

how are you today? I hope everything is well for you and you family.

As per Mr. Johnson´s request, please find attached the mentioned expenses form. Please fill it out completly and as detailed and precise as you can. Please let me have you filled form back as soon as possible. I have to make sure that Bob gets a rather big amount of cash before his flight and I need at least two days to process the transfer to him.

If you have any questions, pleases feel free to contact me. Thanks and have a great day.

With best regards

Volker Lehmann
Berlin - Germany


Last night Tony sent this.. noticed the date match Rachel ( see other thread here)


Tony wrote:

Good morning Sir. I have make an enquiries through phone conversation the limit amount thy said is $10,000(wow that is actually correct- I bet bob takes more tho).and due you coming I know that I m not in the town now I traveled and my coming back will be 23rd 24th due (this corresponds to Rachel leaving)to what I said early. So please Sir start make the arrangement by the date.


23rd! that wont work.. what will we do?

Larry writes Bob this morning sounding a little panicked

Larry wrote:
Dear. Mr. Goss. How are you doing? I have not yet heard from anyone what is going? Have you spoke with him ? Let me know if you at all heard from him too. I née update please. My brother


I send this to TONY tonight.. I also forwarded it to Larry.



Bob wrote:
Tony,

Here is my flight info. I will be arriving Monday, July 11th at 11:10am your time.. Tony, I hate to ask this of you since your mother is so sick but if you could meet me at the airport and help me get settled in my hotel room I would really appreciate it.. I understand this is a huge inconvenience but it can't be help.. Mr Johnson insisted that I come NOW.. I am upset about it myself, I have to leave my business and my Girl Friend and to top it off.. They were sold out of First Class seats!

Look, I understand you are busy with your mom but If we could meet for a few hours a day, I think we can get my part done.. If you can not meet me at the airport, I will have to make other arrangements.. Lets just bare down and bang this out for Mr Johnson and I can fly home and you can go back to your caring for your mom.

Can you please send me your mobile phone number so I can text you.. I can't hear on the blasted things but I can text!


See you Monday!

Bob

Flight info
==============================================

Sun, Jul 10
9:00 am – 4:43 pm
Vancouver (YVR) – Montreal (YUL)
Air Canada 150 · Business Class · Boeing 767

5:50 pm – 7:05 am+1
Montreal (YUL) – Frankfurt (FRA)
Lufthansa 479 · Business Class · Airbus A340

11:10 am+1 – 4:40 pm+1
Frankfurt (FRA) – Lagos (LOS)
Lufthansa 568 · Business Class · Airbus A330
<--- this matches Rachel's flight Twisted Evil (some how I doubt they will make it on the flight)



Then to follow up with Larry I sent this short note..

Bob wrote:
Larry

Thank you for your reply.. I sent you my flight info in another email to Tony, that I forwarded you . I will be in Lagos Next Monday and stay for at least 4 days.. Is there a way we can meet during that time? I am willing to put you up in a hotel with me for a couple days if you want to come over to Lagos..

Talk with you soon, Your brother



Any guesses what will happen Monday?

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PostPosted: Sat Jul 09, 2016 7:53 am Reply with quoteBack to top

Silly boy! He also sends a panicked email to Mr Johnson.

Lad wrote:
Good Morning Sir. I got your message and Mr. Goss. too Sir please I told Mr.Goss no to be coming the on the date he said because I am not in the town now and I have not one to pick him up in airport. Sir. Please we have to keep his coming up to 24th I told him early because I have to finish some things here before coming back to Lagos.

I dont want him to be stranded in the Lagos please let us keep Mr.Goss. Trip on 24th for a reason. Please reach so that he can rearrange is trip for the date so that we can have free movement due he can see when he come I m faraway from town now.

Thank you Sir for you understanding.i appreciate that.

Tony


Mr Johnson, of course, is not to be pushed around. But he likes Tony, so he turns down his request, to change Bob's arrival dates, in Mr Johnson's own way.

Mr Johnson wrote:
Tony!

You are a fuss-pot, sometimes, my good man! It's good that you are showing concern and perhaps even panic that Bob Goss is arriving in your country on Monday, but I assure you there is no need to feel that way.
Bob Goss is an outdoors man. Have you seen his place over the pond? He has acres and acres of land of all different sorts, some of it damned dangerous just to set foot on it! Don't worry yourself, Tony. Bob Goss is not going to be stranded in Lagos without you being there. Trust me, that is not going to happen! He's a resourceful fellow and he rarely needs to rely on others. You should have seen him during what he and I now refer to as "The Penguin Incident". We were down on Cape Horn, Terra del Feugo, Magellan Straits, that kind of place down at the bottom of South America. Ever been there, Tony? Terrible place. Awful weather, awful conditions all round, and barely a patch of civilization to be seen. And would you believe it? We came across some penguins! Vicious buggers they were, too. I thought penguins were only found on Antarctica but apparently they are found on the mainland, too, down there. We met those brutes too many times, and they were a constant menace to our camp. Anyway, Bob Goss was a complete hero throughout the whole two weeks and I wouldn't be here to tell this tale if it weren't for that splendid chap.

Short version: Never underestimate Bob Goss.
He's like the Swiss Army Knife of men, and can pull out the right set of tools and skills to deal with anything. An abolute trooper, that's what he is! If he were in my army, he'd be promoted to brigadier the day he joined.

So rest easy, my good man. Bob Goss might want to meet you once or twice for a few hours, mainly to hand over your money, but he will not need you there all day every day babysitting him as if he were a little boy. No, sir! He's survived plenty of scrapes more threatening than Lagos airport.

(Hahaha! I'm still laughing like a good'un at what you wrote about thinking Bob Goss will be "stranded in Lagos". What an impossible thing! Will never happen!)

I don't mean to josh you too much, Tony. You're a solid bloke and I'm depending on you. Just like I depend on Bob Goss because I know you two chaps are cut from the same cloth. You're my go-to guys, as I've heard my Yank friends say. You're the fellows I turn to when I want something done and I know you will both get it done. So don't worry about Bob Goss. He will manage perfectly on his own.


regards,
RJ


Just to send a similar message from a different source...

Rachel, on Chat, wrote:
Tony! Still not here? Okay, I can cope with that because I know I'll have you all to myself ALL DAY next week and the week after.
But Tony, just remember this: I'm not a possessive clingy girl who will not let you do your own things, okay? If you need to do something for work or for your family or your friends, anything you need to do, just let me know and you can go do it, okay? I don't want to interrupt your normal business too much.


EDIT: As I was making this post, Tony emailed me again.

Lad wrote:
Thank you sir. Only problem right now is that we can see at this time because I am not in the town and here in Nigeria we have limits of amount that he will come with you which is 10.000 that you will have to come to Nigeria. Sir. Will not like Goss to come without being see me at this time so sir please you have to cancel his coming because I can't make it to see him.

give give me that money is not the problem when you come you can give me the money . So I want you Sir. To cancel the trip I will only be in town on 24th.

please Sir Make the arrangement Goss trip un the date which 24th that is good time for his coming. Thank you sir you can call me +2348099999999.

Tony


Mr Johnson wrote:
Tony!

Good to see you up and about so early! I hate to see youngsters lying in bed like corpses in a crematorium, as the saying goes.

I can almost hear the panic in your words, sir. Did you understand my email completely? Bob Goss is not a man who is ever stranded anywhere. He's been to places far more isolated, far more scary than bloody Lagos bloody airport! He has lived on his own for a long time, and he doesn't rely on people (except recently with this young Rebecca girl he's hooked up with now, damn fool that he is!).

Also, I have personally carried far more than $10,000 on a plane. I have stories, do I ever! Bob and I know how to get more than that piffling amount through the damned airport checks and security, don't worry. Bob Goss will be bringing your expenses plus a nice bonus for yourself, so the airport security people can go hang themselves for all I care.

If you haven't understood my message, Tony, I will state it plainly and simply: No, I will not change Bob Goss's arrival date.
He's an independent man of immense skill and resourcefulness. He does not need a chaperone or a ruddy nanny, and he will do everything he can to meet you, no matter where you are at the time.

If I read any more emails like the last two you've sent me, I will start to wonder what game you are playing with me here, Tony.


regards,
RJ


FURTHER EDIT: Another email from him. As I'm writing this, I know he's online because he and Rachel are chatting. I'm expecting another email to Mr Johnson at any moment after this one.

Tony wrote:
Sir I'm not in any part planning game for I doing this because I know you a kind Sir I am saying this for my own confortable time I m here because I don't want to failed anyone so sir if you said so good only that you could have ask me when do I want goss to me coming. Here I m is far East like I said. If you are sure that he will find his way were that is good then I will figure out how to meet him.

my own suggestions is that I be true until 24 so that can take him around the location for the couple of days he will be because I knew that he don't know anyway in Nigeria. If you ask Mr. Goss he tell what I told him I am working with you so Sir give the time I ask you to finish what I have at hand thank you sir.

Yours. Tony


Mr Johnson wrote:
Tony, Tony, my good chap!

I see you understand what I am writing. Thank you! I knew you were the kind of man who spoke my language. I could tell from the way you wrote your emails to me.

Bob Goss is an amazing fellow, as I've said before. If he needs to stay over there for two weeks (until the 24th) then that is what he will do. Then, when you are free, you can personally show him your own experiences of the place and he can add this to his report. Info from a chap on the ground, so to speak. It's always good to get the views of the natives.

He will most probably want to hand over your expenses sooner, however. I know he doesn't like carrying large sums of money around, and I'm not sure he trusts foreign banks and deposit boxes. I know for certain he doesn't trust his own country's banks and keeps his money in a safe under his bed! What a character, yes?
So expect an email or a telephone call from him next week, asking to meet up for a short time so he can hand over your money.

Keep up the good work, and don't stress so much. You've got me as a good chum, Tony, and I don't let my friends down.

regards,
RJ


EDIT 3: As expected...
Okay, so I'm encouraging him by writing straight back but I enjoy writing Mr Johnson's emails.

Tony wrote:
Ok Sir but please remember to plan how he will done that about the limits of the amount I said so that they will not think I m a fraud anyone then will can know how he will be receiving the rest. And you have seeing the obodu mountain restore is good. Please remember for that to know how he will be doing for money.


Mr Johnson wrote:
Tony, my good man!

Bob Goss has carried lots of money through airports before now. He knows all the tricks to do this safely. There was one time he and I were flying to Mongolia. Ever been there, Tony? Wonderful place but don't ever stuck in that Gobi desert. Terrible area! Stick to the green parts of Mongolia, that's my advice. Anyway, we flew there and I wanted to buy a herd of Mongolian strawback llamas. Rare beasts, but with amazing fur that can be turned into the softest blankets you'll ever sleep in. Local chaps didn't have bank accounts so I had to take cash. A lot of cash. We're talking a few hundred thousand dollars, Tony. Bob showed me how to get that cash through the airport without anyone knowing what was happening. What a trooper!
So don't worry about the money. Okay?

You mention Obudu mountain resort again. You keep teasing me, sir! Have you ever been there? I would like to get a personal report from someone who has been to the place. That would be amazing if you could do that for me!

Keep ploughing on, Tony, you're a drainpipe in a downpour, that's what you are.

regards,
RJ


I feel I've calmed him down somewhat, compared to earlier this morning.

UPDATE AGAIN: I won't reply to this one until later.

Tony wrote:
Ok I will ask to find some that been there so that I Can get the full details of that place Sir.

Thank you yours in faithful.

Tony


Obviously talking about Obudu mountain resort. lighten_up and I don't have any definite plans to get him there YET. It's just there, in the background, waiting...

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Last edited by Otterfan on Sat Jul 09, 2016 10:56 am; edited 5 times in total
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PostPosted: Sat Jul 09, 2016 8:22 am Reply with quoteBack to top

This is great! Is it Monday yet?

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PostPosted: Sat Jul 09, 2016 3:50 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

Busy day for Larry and Tony. I woke up this morning and my inbox was stacked full of panicked emails from Tony and Larry.

Late last night (EST) I sent Larry and Tony Bob's flight plan.. I received an email from him about 5-6am his time..

Tony wrote:
Sir. You could have ask me before booking flights I told you that I m not in the town now here I m is faraway from the Lagos please I beg of you to change your plan please tell Mr. Johnson what i said please i don't want you to be stranded over here because i am not around before i will be coming back is on 24th please and please rebooking your flight tickets please i am not at Lagos now don't be coming until 24th. Thankyou.


He sounds a little excited.. If you see OFan's post he is busy writing RJ also

But a 5 mins later he does give me his cell number

Tony wrote:
Here is my number +23480 285X XXXX


8 minutes later...

Tony wrote:

Sir I don't like you to be coming now I sent an email to mr.Johnson now let me hear from because here is too faraway his village I m not in Lagos now. (he better resolve this before Monday or he will have some explaining to do ) Understand me I don't want you to be stranded at the airport and I don't make any arrangement for you coming due to I m not in Lagos now. Please we have to make the plan on 24th Sir.let me know what you said.


See email to Mr J above..

In the meantime, a few hours later, Gonzola pokes Mr Tony about the expense form...

Mr Lehmann wrote:

Good day Tony,

I think I might now have emphasized how urgent this form is. Bob Goss is leaving for Africa the day after tomorrow. I am already in a very tight schedule to get the money to him on time. But I am stuck with this until I have your form.
Please do your very best to fill out and send it to me. We do not have much time left! If you can not find a scanner nearby, just use the camera on your phone. But please make sure the form is properly photographed and that I will be able to read everything.

Your effort and help on this is highly appreciated. Thank you.



After RJ has calmed Larry a bit, I receive this

Tony wrote:
Since you book that let me figure out how to move before you arrived (ah.. he is figuring it out Very Happy)I m also make arrangements if I m not at the Airport before you arrive I want get some that will pick and get you the hotel before I get there. Is that okay?Sir.

and any money you come with you know how to package it for security reasons and secured. Because Mr.Johnson TOLD Me that you moved me ugly Amount so please try to package it very well I plan how to meet you over.


So how do you read this last part.. Is he saying .. Mr Johnson says you're an expert on moving money so why are you asking stupid questions about how much you can bring? Is he detecting a inconsistency? or is he just saying Mr J and I are tight so he TOLD me you would bring money.. ?? Either way we might need to be careful .

An aside: I think its fun how far Bob has come from not knowing what money gram is, a confused old man, and almost sinking his boat to NOW Expert "penguin" fighting Laughing Indiana Jones adventurer. I love Reading what Bob and RJ adventures has done before. Great job OFan!


ETA:

Since I read last night that double posts are Bad! Very Happy. I will add here

Bob wrote:
Tony,

I am so glad you are coming to understand and wiling to be of assistance.. I just got a panicked email from Mr Lehmann.. He says you have not filled out an expense report.. Are you saying you have NO expenses for all your travels.. I mean, My brother Larry had over $1500 worth of expenses for just a couple days trip.. I mean, my good man, I have to imagine you have spent a fair money. Now Tony, As we discussed, I will be bringing a some of money but, First It's Mr Johnson's money and I can NOT just hand it out because I like you or you say you are owed it.. I Understand completely you have spent your money. While I have some access to funds here, I believe, Mr Lehmann is going to try to meet me (or some courier) at Frankfurt Airport on my layover and get me some more cash. Packaged properly as you suggested.. How much really depends on your report.. FYI, we typically deal in USD dollars. Is that ok? Please Tony -- I can't press upon you enough -- get this report done ASAP.

Oh you say your not in Lagos.. What town are you in right now.. How far is that from Lagos? Is that where your mom lives? Btw. How is she?
(i just couldn't help myself)
Well I better run I have a lot to do before I leave Sunday.

I look forward to meeting you soon

Your Friend

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Your epileptic in constant response at this 11th hour is quite unfortunate.

Bob -- Is me Mr. Spock ...
Do not send any money to Feathers otherwise he will kill you in your dreams --

: My Hebrew Translator say name it like ASS CREAM PONG. Correct?
Lad: With this insult for my surname i know that you will not have any respect for me

You know you are a cheat. so all that you say is nonsense. What you didn't know is that i know you are fraud
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PostPosted: Sat Jul 09, 2016 11:21 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

Latest from Tony. So does he does he not have expenses ??


Tony wrote:
Yes i am not in Lagos but I have made arrangement who will help me to received you from the airport before I arrived you have my number to call me when you arrive. And I did tell Mr.Lehmann that I don't have any experience no I only told him that here I m I don't have any missed to print the form out that is what I told him. I have a lot of experience

my Mum is here in the village here is 6hours journey I m figuring out up you coming. Keep me posted as soon you arrive I prayed to be there.

I m wait to hear from soon.

Tony.

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___________________
Your epileptic in constant response at this 11th hour is quite unfortunate.

Bob -- Is me Mr. Spock ...
Do not send any money to Feathers otherwise he will kill you in your dreams --

: My Hebrew Translator say name it like ASS CREAM PONG. Correct?
Lad: With this insult for my surname i know that you will not have any respect for me

You know you are a cheat. so all that you say is nonsense. What you didn't know is that i know you are fraud
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