Clue - The Murder Mystery Game

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Posted: Tue Jan 08, 2013 7:14 pm

sense in bringing monkeys to a dinner party?
Surely it's better to..."

Posted: Wed Jan 09, 2013 1:29 pm

"... take the party to the monkeys?"

Colonel Mustard gripped his banana tightly. This one was trouble, he could tell.

"Who asked..."

Posted: Fri Jan 11, 2013 10:16 pm

for a peanut colander?

The others smiled uneasily, it's that ear hair, thought...

Posted: Fri Jan 11, 2013 10:52 pm

Mrs Peacock, remembering a time long ago in her youth when such things were....

Posted: Sun Jan 13, 2013 5:20 pm

plaited and had beads woven into it.
From another room there came a distant 'THUD!'

Posted: Sun Jan 13, 2013 7:41 pm

"Quiet in there!" bellowed Mustard. "We're having an argument!"

"What? Don't be ridiculous man, it's obviously a heated debate!" retorted Plum.

"Er... shouldn't ve investigate zat loud noize?" simpered Miss Scarlett.

Posted: Mon Jan 14, 2013 5:17 pm

Just then an Inspector flanked by two uniformed policemen bursts into the room!

"All right, don't anybody move, there's been a murder!", said the Inspector.

Posted: Tue Jan 15, 2013 7:16 am

"A murder!" cried Colonel Mustard "Surely you cannot be serious?"

"I am serious" said the Inspector "and don't call me shirley"

There was a distant faint sound of 'da-boom tisshh'

The Inspector continued "One of you in this room is guilty of ....."

Posted: Tue Jan 15, 2013 2:28 pm

"A murder?", said Miss Scarlett.

The inspector replied, "No... no ... not a murder... no what's like a murder but begins with B?"

"Birmingham." said Col. Mustard

"No ... no ... no ... no ... no...", replied the Inspector.

Just then Professor Plum had a revelation, "Burnley?", he queried.

The Inspector's eyes lit up, "Burnley - that's right! Burnley in Lancashire. There's been a Burnley."

Posted: Wed Jan 16, 2013 9:59 pm

Professor Plum snorted.
"Have you been at the brandy?" I've never heard such ...

Posted: Wed Jan 16, 2013 10:13 pm

" ... inspirational rhetoric since my grandfather ate that whole batch of bad rye-bread "

The embarrassed silence that followed was broken by stifled giggling from behind the -

Posted: Thu Jan 17, 2013 3:26 pm

chaise longue where a mouse was trying to pull a wheelie in a small car.

'You sure there's not one of those time portal thingys' in the room said

Posted: Thu Jan 17, 2013 5:35 pm

Professor Plum, thus revealing himself to be a Doctor Who fan.

"Of course zere iz not!" spluttered Miss Scarlett "you haf been spending too much time viz your hand on your..."

Posted: Thu Jan 17, 2013 8:51 pm

'Zonic zcrewdrifer, Vat kind of veapon is zat'?

Professor Plum's lips moved silently as he translated the sentence.

'Is anyone actually dead yet?' said

Posted: Thu Jan 17, 2013 11:43 pm

...the Undertaker, fiddling with his tape measure behind the Policemen.
Mrs White replied "It's nothing to do with me Sir, I was ordered to cook a....

Posted: Fri Jan 18, 2013 12:37 pm

beef burger from Tesco, but as it was still running in the 3:30 at Doncaster*, I had to change the menu to...

* For our overseas guests who might not get the link Wink

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2264394/Horse-meat-scandal-hit-Tesco-centre-Twitter-backlash-customer-care-message-told-followers-staff-hit-hay.html

Posted: Fri Jan 18, 2013 9:56 pm

Something more arsenicky. Just think of it as garlic with a bit of a kick.
Here, try a bit of this...

Posted: Sat Jan 19, 2013 12:51 am

..Spotted Dick', as she waved the 10" pastry dessert in the air. 'Donner und Blitzen' exclaimed Miss Scarlett 'Zat iz exactly like vat der Reverend Green pulled out of his....

Posted: Sat Jan 19, 2013 12:50 pm

veapon case zee uzzer mornink.

Eyeish feelink a bit furnee, vot vas insh my driningk?

Posted: Sun Jan 20, 2013 10:45 am

Mrs Peacock glared at Miss Scarlett .
"Damn foreigners" she muttered under her breath "Why, in my day I'd have..."

Posted: Sun Jan 20, 2013 12:17 pm

started a campaign of bumper stickers, car boot sales, inflammatory pamphlets and other forms of slacktivism."

Miss Scarlett burped. "Well I declare, y'all, one nip of Jack Daniels and I'm a Southern gal. I wonder what would happen if I drank some Scotch?"

But as she reached for the sideboard,

Posted: Mon Jan 21, 2013 2:01 pm

it changed into a Welsh dresser.
A soft female voice echoed around the room "Probability factor is now 4,762,703 to one and falling"
There was a distant faint laugh which sounded very much like Douglas Adams.

The Inspector shook his head "Enough! There still remains the fact that there is a dead body in the..."

Posted: Mon Jan 21, 2013 8:42 pm

spin dryer. We've received an anonymous tip-off that it is in fact the corpse of a notorious spin doctor and chief designer for the Ikea Sentient Furniture Division, Dimple Fourscin."

"Good lord," spluttered Professor Plum, "one of the Ladian Fourscin clan? If he was here, then

Posted: Mon Jan 21, 2013 9:52 pm

...who on earth did I leave my dirty laundry with this morning?"

"Interesting" mused the Inspector."That may be connected to the spin dryer. Crumpleweed!"

"Sah?" asked the sergeant, dropping the glass of port he had been sniffing hopefully.

"Crumpleweed, make a note. Fourscin may have had a sideline in washing dirty laundry. Make some preliminary enquiries, and see if it was being done..." a small shudder of distaste ran down the Inspector's spine "in public."

"Oh, no!" gasped Mrs Peacock, fainting onto the couch.

Posted: Tue Jan 22, 2013 12:36 am

She stared in amazement as the floor slid open, and out of it, like the Deomon King himself, there arose ...

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