The Baiters Cup (dry run) Scammy VS Branwen- BRANWEN WINS!!!

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Posted: Tue Jul 28, 2009 8:08 am

/\

Lad has written:

Quote:

Thank you my new friend,
I really appreciate your kind,you are a very kind person and our prayer to you is that you will always meet kindness and favour from both God and man,we are very happy over your reply and we await to hear from you as soon as you promised.

Dear Lad, you need not think that you are just going to sit there and wait for the money to roll in. No. You are going to write nice emails to me.

My character, therefore, wrote:

Quote:

I'm hoping that the market trader will get in touch today, so I know where I am this week, and which day I can go to the bank. We might also have to have the vet out to look at our horse, who doesn't seem quite right, somehow, but that's no problem, because my wife Julie can see to him, she won't need me here.

I was thinking last night, when you get to Ghana, do you already have a place to live arranged? Do you have friends there?

I'll write again once I know when I'm free to go to the bank.

419Eater is my life Joined: 15 Apr 2009 Posts: 296

I've pinged the lad again:

I wrote:

I have not heard from you in a couple of days now, I am getting worried, please tell me you are OK!!!!!

I think I'm toast though. I didn't anticipate the lad would be inundated with baiters, and I really should have slowed down a lot when he first showed signs of not being a total moron... oops. It's not my fault, my computer's excuse chip is pretty slow, and I sprained my excuse muscle the other day, and I have excuse flu, so really I think we can all agree I should get a medal for even managing to email the guy in the first place. Wink

I'm going to keep bouncing short emails off him in the hope he will pick me up again, but at this juncture I think my best hope is to catch the lad on google chat. It's not something I usually do, but desperate times call for desperate baiting.

Posted: Tue Jul 28, 2009 10:24 am

Scammy Scameroo wrote:

....

Good luck! Thumbs up

419Eater is my life Joined: 15 Apr 2009 Posts: 296

Sweet! I'm still in it. I thought I was done for sure...

Lad wrote:

Hello Dear,
Am ok,i just went down the city to see if i could find a minial job to do to atleast get some feeding fee,but it was not successful,well after i long arguement with chioma,she finally gave me her fathers email address,but please,do not disclose our way about to him,he is a very mean and bad man,his name is Mr Tony Okoye,and his email is [email protected],
While you try to convince him,please send us the $2000 using monegram transfer,we really need some money to sustain us for now,use my name and adress;

name:Imoh derek
Address:lagos Nigeria

Please also send me a scanned copy of the transfer slip so i could use the informations contained in it to lay claims to the funds.God bless you as we await to hear from you.

This has suddenly opened the game back up- it's now straight-bait vs wonky bait!

To the Father, I wrote:

Hello to you!!!! You don't know me but I am a friend who is helping your daughter, she has said you are a great man and powerful and things so I wanted to have the chance to write with you, because I hope that one day I will be a great man like you.

I am worried about you and your daughter and your daughter's man Imoh Derek, I understand that you are having a problems at the moment but I really hope I can help with the problems because I am already helping your daughter and I want to be able to help everyone, because it is better to solve a problem than just to cover it up I say!!!!!!

So please tell me what you think the problem is at the moment and I promise I can make it be fixed because I can persuade Chomia and Imoh and they will come around because they will listen to me because they will trust that I am impartial which means I am solving the problem without taking a side.

You can trust me I will help!!!!!!

To the lad, I wrote:

Thank you for giving me a chance to fix things, I promise you will not regret it, I will talk to him and I know he will listen to reason. I will make sure this problem is solved and I don't care what it costs, I promise you will be able to live safe and as a family, don't worry!!!!!

I have not been able to sleep because of worrying about you and chomia but now I know I can fix things. I have emailed him to find out his point of view because when I know both sides of the story that means I can work out how to make it be OK for everyone.

About this moneygram I am really not sure what it is really, I don't handle my money myself I pay a man to do it. I can ask him to work out what it is!!!! Would it be easier just to send it to your bank account though??? He does that all the time when I send money to my friends.

I decided I needed to hint at more carrot to make sure he doesn't wander off again. I'm a stupid rich man who doesn't really understand much about money but means well, and I'm setting up an accountant character to blame for any problems with the payments. Also it would be quite nice to be able to catch up on that piggy... Wink

EDIT: Bah!

The Lad wrote:

Hello friend,
i do not have a domicillary account of my own,can you pay the money through western union money transfer?if you can,please use it with the same information i gave you,it works like moneygram.

Regards.

I'll get my accountant to squeeze that out of him later. Smile

I wrote:

I will ask Mark to look at that, he is the man who deals with my accounts and investments and things, I don't really do any of that myself!!!! I just know bank transfers are quick because he does those for me a lot when I send money to my friends.

Chomia's father has not replied yet but I will let you know what happens there, I am sure I will be able to make things be OK!!!!!! I am planning to wait for him to reply before I send money because that way I have the money free if I need to spend some money to help sort out the problems between you and him and Chomia, and if I send that money right away I will have to wait a week before more money is free so that would make everything delayed which would be bad, so I am going to make sure I know what is going on there first OK????

Hang in there, everything will be fine!!!!!!!

EDIT: Meanwhile...

The Father wrote:

who are you to tell me what to do or make peace between me and that idiot, you should know that he know me better than you, he know what am capeble of doing, my boys have handled him once and if they lay there hands on him again he will forget the day he was born, tell him to return my daughter and forget about what i do with the baby, my daughter already have a husband ready for her, that thing she is carying must go,so you better shot your mouth in a case you know nothing about.

by the way were can i find them? tell me now or i will be on lookout for you too,

i have spoken.

have a bad day idiot.

Subject line was "IDIOT". Nice! I'll see if I can talk him round with my Persuasion Power.

To the Father, I wrote:

There is no need to be nasty and call me an idiot!!!! I am impartial so I can help because of that.

I know you are angry because of your daughter being pregnant because of Imoh making sex inside her, but I am sure we can work out a way of making all the things be fine and OK!!!!! You don't need to make your boys be on his tail and then handle him, because I will be able to make this problem be solved in a way that means your boys can stay at home and it will save you effort and also will mean your daughter comes back with love and happy instead of angry because of you.

So give me a chance OK, I promise I can make things work!!!!!

So to make sure I can solve this problem I need to know what everyone wants, I know Imoh wants to not be handled by the boys and I know you want to get your daughter back home with you and have an abortion for the baby, but I also think I know that you want her to be back and happy, right?????? Well she will not be happy if Imoh is messed up and gone, which means you won't be happy either and he won't be happy. So you can see that is not the solution because it is bad for everyone.

What is the problem with her coming home and getting the abortion???? Is it the money that it will cost???? Because I know abortions are really expensive but that is something I can help with, you may be a powerful man but so was my father and he left me enough money to be able to do anything, I can pay for the abortion if that is the problem. Or is there another problem as well???? If there is you should tell me!!!!!

I will fix everything!!!! It is what I like to do.

To the Lad, I wrote:

I have read an email from Chomia's father and he is very angry!!!! But I think he will see reason, I just need to work out what is the solution that is best for everyone, and then make that solution happen, it really is that easy to solve a problem!!!! But I need to know what everyone wants first, I know what Chomia's father wants I think, and I know you want to be safe with Chomia safe and not have him trying to hurt you.

I have a plan!!!! Just don't worry OK????

Can I also have Chomia's email please so I can see what it is that she wants???? I know that she wants you to be safe because she loves you but I also wonder if there is something else she wants!!!!!

They say it is hard for a rich man to go to heaven but I think it is not hard, you just have to know what is the right thing and then do the right thing, the money is just a tool you use, and I can definitely help you, I just need you to listen and give me a chance OK?????

I've ramped up the stupid a notch in attempt to account for the fact I've just offered to pay for an abortion... Shocked

EDIT:

The Lad wrote:

My Dear,
You are making things more dangerous for us,we need to leave to Ghana immediately,you do not know that man,chioma even said to me that he suspect her father as being a member of a powerful secret cult in nigeria called Ogbeni, he can decide to accept that everything is ok so that he could lay his hands on me through you,please if you really care about us,please i beg of you,just send us the money first so we could travel for our safty,i will continue to write you mails from Ghana once we arrive safely,then you can continue to persuade him until he comes to terms with you.
I really need this baby to be alive,please do not watch while my baby dies,i beg you in Gods name.

To the Lad, I wrote:

I am telling you to trust me because I know I can make this OK, I know it!!!!!!

I did not know Chomia's father was a cult leader, that is a big thing, but it does not scare me because my father was in society and they are sort of the same thing, it is just a thing that important people are part of that means they do favours for each other. I know why you are so scared of him though, because that means he is really powerful!!! But that is just more reason to let me help fix the problems, because running away to Ghana won't help because there will be people in the cult there too running the police and customs and things!!!!!

You say you want the baby alive, does that mean that is one of the things you really want???? Is that because abortions are expensive???? Because if someone could help pay for the medical bills and that would make you not mind because it wouldn't cost you so much, that would be useful in making peace. But if you want the baby to get born I will have to think about it.

What does Chomia want???? She wants you to be safe I bet, and Ghana is no more safe than where you are is!!!!! So you should let me work things out for her sake.

So, Chioma's evil father is a member of a dangerous religious cult? Ace. That's a thread I'm definitely going to be tugging on once I work out whether the lad's open to haggling over an abortion. Twisted Evil

EDIT: Hmm. I wonder if I'm going to hit the maximum post length at some point. Anyway, further emails have been emailed...

The Lad wrote:

With due respect,if money for abortion was my problem,i would have left chioma, and her father will pay for the abortion he wanted badly,i do not understand were this arguement is leading us,all i ask is to stay in Ghana while you sort things out the best way you know how,what is difficult for you to understand in this?chioma and i are in love,if she never wanted the baby as much as i do,she would not have accepted to run away with me at all,if you wish to help,just help ok?am really tired,well,pls just help us first then help us to solve the problem with her father when we are safe.

To the Lad, I wrote:

OK, so you want to keep the baby, I understand!!!! But you have to understand why I want to solve the problem instead of just helping you run away, it is so you can have money to live with and to pay for helping the baby and things instead of it being spent on hiding!!!!! And he is a powerful man so I don't think hiding would work anyway.

I will talk to Mark tomorrow about the money grams and Wester Union and how to get the money to you for now, but I want to sort things out so you don't waste it on running away when running away won't help at all, OK????

Why does Chomia's father hate you so much???? Is is because he is powerful and runs the cult and you are not the same kind of person, or is it something you have done?????

There are a world of possibilities opening up with this evil cult thing, and the fact that offering to pay to abort his child was responded to with an email starting "With due respect" shows me I'm dealing with a lad who isn't going to be particularly phased by things getting a bit dark. This one could be fun...

EDITS AD INFINITUM:

The Lad wrote:

My dear,
I have not done anything wrong,God is my witness,the only thing i have done wrong to him is poverty,we come from different financial backgroung and he beleives we cannot co-exist,besides,according to chioma,she said that her father has already gotten a man that he wants to mary her,so as it is now,i and my unborn baby are obstacles that he believes that has to be removed.

To the Lad, I wrote:

I see, it is money and status!!!! I think I have an idea, when I hear back from Chomia's father I will tell him about the idea and see if he thinks it is OK, but I think it is a good idea!!!!

I think your problems could be over soon!!!! I will let you know what he says.

I've formulated a plan. Bwahahahahaaaa. Twisted Evil

419Eater is my life Joined: 15 Apr 2009 Posts: 296

The previous post has become implausibly long, so I'm starting a new one. Smile

The Father wrote:

Do you know who i am?how dare you insult me by suggesting i do not have money for abortion,now you listen carefully ,all i want is for my daughter to come back now that it is still possible to remove that bastard she is carrying,you are really getting on my nerves by interfering in what is no buiness of yours,listen,if you do not tell me were they are,i will go to the television stations and declare derek or dereky or what ever he calls himself,i will declare him wanted for kidnapp,i will put a reward price of 500000naira on his head for whoever finds him,i will also use my influence to demand that he should be shot at sight by the police.i can save myself the stress and pay the money to you if you tell me were and how to find them,if not he should wait for his greatest nightmare.

No regards.

500000 Naira is about $3500. The lad clearly views this as an amount of money that would be significant for a rich, powerful cult member, which gives me a useful sense of scale. I've interpreted this email as a test of my character's status and intentions- which is actually rather clever. This is definitely an above-average lad.

To the Father, I wrote:

You are trying to bribe me?????? Hahahahah!!!!!! That has never happened before!!!! It seems like it is you who has not done his research I think!!!!!!

There is a reason Chomia and Imoh came to me!!!! You might be a big man where you are but you are not the biggest here any more so don't try to threaten me or bribe me or any of that OK???? We can talk about this like business and civil, OK?????

I understand the problem is you don't want him to marry your daughter because of two things:
1) He is poor from a poor family
2) He has a different background and he is not in your group

And those are the only problems. Well I happen to know for a fact that those problems are solved!!!!! I can prove it too. So what do you think now????? Not an idiot now am I?????

Note: Still an idiot. Smile

To the Lad, I wrote:

I think he will accept my idea!!!! I will explain it to you now.

There are two problems, that mean he doesn't like you.

1) You are poor
2) You are not in his group

But here is my idea to fix those.

1) You will pay him a dowry for Chomia!!!!! This is a traditional thing, it proves that you are able to pay to support her and that you are not poor. Actually I will pay it but he won't know that so he will think it is from you, and this will prove you are not poor and are able to marry his daughter. I don't know how much is a good amount though because I don't know how rich he is, I don't think he is very rich really so I was thinking $20,000???? Or should it be more????? You know more about him than I do!!!!! It should be big enough that he is impressed but small enough that he is not suspicious about you having that much.

2) I will pay a man to make a video that proves you are a member of the cult Ogbeni!!!! It will be a video of the induction ceremony that I will tell him I took it in secret and you don't know about it. I will give it to him, then when he sees the video he will know you are really part of his group!!!!! But the thing is the video will be made by computer, the man I will pay will fake it so it looks real and no-one can tell it is a fake. And because it is a secret cult, he will never ask you to talk about it or prove it, he will just know about it and think about you differently because of it.

I think this will work, so he will like you and respect you and you and Chomia will be able to live in peace and happy.

Please tell me what you think!!!!!

I've thrown a whole load of shit at the wall here, let's see what sticks. The dowry is bait for a safari, the video will require a bunch of trophy pics in various poses, and I still have the accountant with the $2000 payment to cram the guy through some payment modalities and hopefully get a bank account or two. I don't need to pull much of this stuff off to make this a fairly impressive bait, but there's a good chance he'll just tell me to bugger right off or start ignoring me again at any moment. I'm baiting right on the raggedy edge of believability here...

Posted: Wed Jul 29, 2009 1:50 pm

Somebody round here is keeping that Lad far too busy!

I had to prompt him into replying:

Quote:

I wanted to go to the bank and send that money to you today. But I didn't hear from you at all yesterday, so I'm a bit concerned. Is everything alright?

I've waited and waited to hear from you, so I know that all is well and I can still send the money, but there's just been nothing.

It's a bit late for me to go to the city now, as I have to go by train at the moment. And I've got my church home group later today, so I need to milk and feed the animals early today, So I'll have to go another time now.

But please let me know that all is alright.

Lad blamed the rain (Scammy Showers?):

Quote:

How is your day today? am really sorry for not contacting you ealier.it rained heavily in Nigeria today and it affacted the internet access,but everything is ok now,please you can send me the money by tomorrow,also remember to send me the transfer slip as i requested ealier.
Thank you once again for your understanding and care,and God will bless youinabundance.

But he is not going to get away with now ignoring my previous mail, asking about what will happen when he gets to Ghana:

Quote:

I'm sorry, it will have to wait until Friday now, I'm too busy tomorrow. I wanted to go today, but I was worried about not hearing from you.

Please keep in touch, so that I know that you are still able to receive the money.

I was disappointed that you did not answer the questions that I previously asked you, I asked out of true concern, and I feel as if my concern has just been dismissed as unimportant.

He's a sensitive man, my burly farmer.

Juan's stalker Joined: 28 Aug 2008 Posts: 1423

I'm giggling at you two. Nice work! Laughing

Posted: Wed Jul 29, 2009 2:05 pm

I like this. well done the two of you.

if my idea is correct, this adds a new twist to this competition. one baiter is keeping the lad VERY busy, the other baiter has to get the lad interested in him again.

419Eater is my life Joined: 15 Apr 2009 Posts: 296

He quite likes my idea, it seems...

The Lad wrote:

That is a brilliant idea,whooo!!!!,you must really be a genuis,i think that will work because all he wants is for a rich man to mary his daughter,to have a granded traditional marriage ceremony in nigerian culture will cost about $17,500,by so doing,he will see me as elligible and will gladly accept me.
So what next?

To the Lad, I wrote:

I am so happy you like the idea!!!! I knew I could fix the problem, I always fix problems when I decide to.

Now I wait to see what he says about it, we have to convince him that you have enough money to pay for things and also that you joined the cult, but I am sure we can do it.

Do you think $17,500 is the right number to say then???? I want to make sure we get the number right because if it is too low he will be offended and if it is too high he won't believe you have the money on your own and he must think you have the money on your own or it won't work.

I will let you know what he says, I really hope he agrees, I said I have proof so he would ask what the proof was and then it would sound like I wasn't suggesting it but just answering him!!!! That is how you make people think they are in charge even if they are not, you see. I told you I was good at persuading!!!!!

EDIT: The lad's quite keen to stay in character- refusing the abortion money as the main character, and now maintaining the hostility whilst playing the father.

The Father wrote:

Hey,
First of all,who are you and why are you intruding in this issue?the boy cannot even feed himself properly not to talk of feeding my daughter,he cannot and can never give her the kind of life she is use to,so what kind of proof do you have that would convince me?listen,i rather you stay out of this ok?and mind you,am a very busy person,so better stop wasting my time and yours,Get some work and stay off.

To the Father, I wrote:

I am , and I am involved in this because Imoh asked me for my help!!!!! He knew you would not listen to him about how he has changed now but you would listen to me because you didn't know me and I am impartial.

It is true that he used to not feed but now it has changed, he has made wise investments of his money and the investments have paid off so now he has money to live a proper life, earlier he was saying to me how he was going to pay for an expensive wedding and how he wanted to give you a dowry for Chomia but he could not talk to you because you were angry!!!!!

And also I have a secret, he does not know I know this but he is a member of a secret cult that is called Ogbeni, they are a group of people that are all powerful and they run things, have you heard of them????? I got a secret video of the ritual he did when he joined them, which will prove he is a member of them, but don't tell him I know about that OK because it is a secret cult and even the different members of the cult sometimes don't know that they are both in the cult.

So you see that he is not a poor person and he is also powerful and has powerful friends too, it would be a good thing for him to marry Chomia and become your son because it would make your family better.

Now you see what I mean I have been trying to tell you this but you were not listening because you were angry but I hope you understand now.

Just to bolster the illusion that I think these are different people:

To the Lad, I wrote:

OK I have emailed to Chomia's father about the plan, I will tell you what he says. I told him this:
***FULL EMAIL TO THE FATHER***

Oh, and I should have mentioned earlier that the father's email address isn't gmail. IP resolves to Onitsha, Nigeria- which, if accurate, is noteworthy for being just over 200 miles from Lagos.

EDIT AGAIN:
Looks like the lad may be temporarily out of action:
http://forum.419eater.com/forum/viewtopic.php?t=169404
Normally, not a problem... but I'm going away tomorrow, until Monday, and this is going to be a fairly major dent in my bait if I don't have chance to give the lad a job to do in the mean time. Arse and arses.

Posted: Thu Jul 30, 2009 4:50 pm

The Lad was a sorry Lad for upsetting my sensitive farmer, and promised a long-lasting relationship:

Quote:

Am really sorry for making you feel that way,please forgive me,in regards toyour previous question,i do not have a place arranged yet,i intend to lodge in a cheap hotel over there for few days,while i look for an urgent cheap one room apartment,then any money left with me,i will start up a little trade with it,the money you intend to send to us will go a very long way,once again,my apologies.
I continue to mail you from ghana to intimate you of any happenings around us.

As Scammy says, however, he appears to be out of action today.

So my character decided to keep on mailing him:

Quote:

Oh, that's good that you have a plan for the future. What is your trade?

I hope that you are online this morning, because I have an unexpected opportunity to go to the bank. I was just copying out the details I need to take with me, and I've got a couple of questions. I want to make sure I get this right.

Are you online?

Quote:

I guess you are not around, then. I'll try and catch you later, maybe in an hour or so.

Quote:

I assume you are still not online.

Quote:

I need to check a couple of things about the account details before I can go to the bank.

Please let me k

Quote:

It looks like my last message got somehow cut short!

It was supposed to end with-

Let me know when you are online.

Quote:

I'm going for lunch now, but I'll check back later

.

Quote:

I'm worried now that I haven't heard back from you all day. I did ask that you would stay in touch.

Quote:

I need to ask you an important question about the account information.

Please let me know when you are online.

He may not have finished yet.

419Eater is my life Joined: 15 Apr 2009 Posts: 296

^^^^^

He's probably sat there right now really hoping that no-one is trying to get hold of him to urgently send money. He may be a tad annoyed when he eventually gets back online...

I'm going to give him until this evening, and then hit him with my impending "business trip". If he gets his internet back tomorrow, I'm at a major disadvantage here. If he gets it back in ten days (as the current predictions suggest) then I could be pretty buggered too- my bait is only just getting to the interesting part, and I'm still trailing by a bank account.

Sad

EDIT: He's back online, it seems!

The Lad wrote:

Thank you very much my dear,you have been of immense help to us and only God will reward you,though i still have my fear,is he going to accept?because that man could be very sturbborn,i hope he buys the idea.

Let's keep our fingers crossed, Lad. This one could go either way! Wink

Posted: Thu Jul 30, 2009 10:43 pm

My character continued emailing:

Quote:

I'm still concerned that you haven't got back to me. What is happening? I don't understand.

I'm trying to help you and Chioma, but you keep disappearing.

You said that your friend James has given you a laptop to use, so it's not as if you are dependent upon one of those internet cafes. Is everything alright?

I'm so sorry you weren't online and I couldn't send you the money today. I don't want to risk getting the details wrong and it going to the wrong person.

Please contact me. Please tell me when you'll be online.

Quote:

Just checking again whether you are online.

And then, Lad reappeared....

....with a second bank account!

(Something happened to the first one perhaps?)

Quote:

I am sorry for my delay,you know i do not stay online all the time because i normally go to do some minial jobs at a building site to sustain myself and chioma,as a man,am not supossed to stay idol all day while my woman is hungry,i hope you understand,as for the account i gave you,what is the problem with it?well,i got a new and more trustworthy dollar account today from a more trustful friend,please since you have not sent the money yet,use this new account for the transfer tomorrow as i trust it more than the former one,and if you have any question regarding this new account,please do not hesitate to contact me.(please do not forget to send me the transfer slip so i can show to the owner of the account as an evidence of transfer)
Here is the new account:

[Another bank account.
Reported to Alan.]

You are a good person,and God will reward you in abundance,i await your response.

419Eater is my life Joined: 15 Apr 2009 Posts: 296

^^^^ Damn. I mean... congratulations! Wink

I got an email from the father. I have no idea why I'm still referring to him as "the father", because when the lad started to play him, he had to give him a name. Obviously, he went for the most impressive-sounding name he could think of at the time... and it's pure lad gold.

Chief Mr Tony wrote:

Hey,
I do not believe your story,how can a poor boy of yesterday become rich overnight?it does not make sense to me,listen,if this is a ploy for me to give my daughter out to that wretched boy,it will not work.

In as much as i do not beleive you,i need a prove of his financial ability,else i will not listen to any other bullshit from you,listen,am not always rude,but i hate the may sight of poverty and i cannot allow any body to contaminate my reputation with it.
let him show me that he is no longer the wretched fool i use to know,then i might consider giving my approval,if not,then do not email me again.

I've decided I may as well go for broke... the odds of this working are virtually zero, but it's worth a shot. I was initially planning to stress the video-faking trophy stuff, but the lad's definitely gravitating away from that, so it seems like the right moment to try something major.

To the Lad, I wrote:

I have got an email from him and it is not great news, I think he is a very clever man, he is saying he wants proof that you have real money before he will listen to things I am saying. I have an idea which might work.

I am going to Dubai tomorrow morning for a weekend with someone who I am invested with, I am not flying back here until early next week. I am thinking that when I am there after I have finished with the man, I can get Mark to get some money from one of the banks there, I am sure there will be some that will have access to a fund of mine. Then on the way back we can fly back and stop at an airport or an airstrip near you and I can give you the money, you can buy a good suit and say you will meet Chomia's father, and when you meet him you will be able to give him the wedding money right there, that will be proof that you are rich now because he will know that poor people can't get lots of money in cash really quickly. But for this to work you will have to not tell him how you got the money!!! Even if he asks, don't tell him even an excuse you make up, because he will think of things that are better in his head and he will be curious and it will make him respect you!!!!

You should think about my plan and find a place to get fitted for a good suit, the suit is important when you are making an impression, you want a good Italian designer, make sure it is a summer style because it is hot there. Also you should think about where is a good place to land, it is only a small jet so it can be a private airfield if there is one near you, but I will need the information because the pilot has to file a flight plan before we leave. You can't change your mind and go somewhere else when you are in the air even if it is near the place you were going, I wanted to go to Paris once and had to land first in Berlin because that was the plan when we took off, so I know there is no way around that.

I will make sure Mark gets enough cash so you have some left too which will make up for not sending any yet!!!! I am sorry but I got excited about the plan and Mark has been busy with the investment meeting plans so nothing got done. I am thinking $25,000 but it will all be in $100 bills to stop it being too heavy, even so it will be a bit heavy, and I know $100 bills are annoying sometimes because it is hard to pay for small things with them, but I am sure you can get that sorted out at a bank even if you do not have an account, don't worry.

I will email you again when I am free next in Dubai, but in the mean time please find out about the airfields for me, also I think you should email Chomia's father and tell him that you will prove you are rich by getting the cash really quickly, that will impress him. I am sorry I do not have time to email him myself!!!!!!

Next email access (in real life) will be Monday afternoon. I'm almost certain he won't be up for travelling, in which case I'll try a different tactic depending on his response.

Posted: Fri Jul 31, 2009 5:15 pm

Plans for today:

- To praise the wonderful Lad;
- To initiate a warm and conversational relationship;
- To have a problem with not having bank addresses (even though the Swift Codes given are quite sufficient);
- To put the blame on the Lad if Character is unable to go to the bank today, due to lack of bank addresses;
- To introduce The Busy Week Next Week.

And so, my character wrote:

Quote:

That is wonderful that you have been able to find work to buy food and immediate needs. I admire your willingness to do that, and to take responsibility for your family, it is a shame that Chioma's father could not recognise that a hard-working, responsible attitude is an ideal thing in a husband and father, and that it is better to be poor and dependable than rich and uncaring.

Is it building work that you are intending to do when you reach Ghana? Building is a good trade, healthy outdoor work, with real results, and every country always needs people who can build and repair houses.

We have just received Julie's next scan appointment. At this one, they will be able to tell us what sex our baby is. We can choose not to know, but we want to be told! We are rather hoping that it is a girl, but it doesn't matter really! It will be exciting to find out, though that's a week and a half away as yet.

We're going to be quite busy next week as we have quite a few bookings for our campsite, and also have three farming volunteers coming. We have WWOOFers come, that means Willing Workers On Organic Farms, volunteers who want to learn about farming (or just get some free accommodation, sometimes!), we give them a bed and meals, in return for their help around the farm. Some, like I say, are really just wanting a couple of nights' free accommodation, but others are very serious about learning organic farming. The two Americans who are coming for a week (arriving this weekend) are serious ones, the French student is just travelling through, I think.

Anyway, it was the name, mostly, I was concerned about on the previous bank account you gave me. I wondered if it was a typing error, as I'd never heard of the name Ruty, and I thought maybe it was meant to be Ruth. I wanted to get it right, because banks can be fussy about things like that.

But that doesn't matter now. I'll take the new bank account information along. The only thing is, I do have to fill in bank addresses on the form as well, so do you have those? For both the corresponding bank and the ultimate bank? If you can get back to me really quickly, that'll be good, Fridays are busy days for travelling and being in the city, so I'd like to get off early if I can.

At least it isn't raining today, it's quite pleasant out this morning. I've had quite a relaxing week: next week will be much busier with the WWOOFers and the campers here.

I hope you and Chioma are in good health, she is fortunate to have a man looking after her so well.

Lad (as I hoped) had not replied by bank closing-time, so Character wrote again:

Quote:

Obviously you have been working today, and didn't have time to give me the bank addresses.

Never mind, I'll make plans to go some other time more convenient to you.

Hope you have had a productive day.

May God bless you and Chioma and the little one.

Posted: Sat Aug 01, 2009 7:54 am

Did I say I wanted to initiate a warm and conversational relationship?

Hahahahaha.

Lad wrote:

Quote:

Just use the corresponding bank as the address as well which is........NEWYORK
And the ultimate bank address as ......NIGERIA

Here is the correct information to use once more:

[Repeat of previously given bank details]

Just give your bank the whole account information as listed above and they will transfer the money.

We hope to hear from you soon.

Good grief, this Lad is hard work!

Through gritted teeth, my character replied:

Quote:

My bank's transfer forms have a section for the full address, and that is what I meant. Nigeria is just the country. I'm looking for the town or city name, plus the street name. That's what I've got to fill in. Same with the New York bank. New York is a big place. The form requires the street name.

I have to give the form to an ordinary bank clerk, and they always want to see it properly filled in before they pass it on to the department that deals with activating the transfers.

It's important to get it done properly. I've been trying to do this for three days now, and I'm finding it very difficult to communicate with you sufficiently.

I know you must be a very busy man, dividing your time between work and Chioma, but I really would have thought that a bit of friendliness too would have been appropriate. Maybe it is different in your country, but in this country we normally converse with people we are in contact with, ask after their family, comment on anytihng they say, and certainly answer their questions.

When somebody ignores all the personal bits of an email, it is taken as rudeness and dislike. So it is hard to receive your mails which seem rather rude to me. I'm sure you don't mean this, but it's still not very pleasant.

Maybe you will have more time this weekend to write a little more?

Posted: Sat Aug 01, 2009 4:20 pm

Lad wrote:

Quote:

I am really sorry for my approach to you,i never new i was rude,maybe i allow my situation to get to me,please forgive me.i have added the address of the bank here in Nigeria,as for the corresponding bank which is [name of bank],the owner of the account said that [name of bank] is an international bank which is located worldwide,it must not be in newyork alone,all you need to do is to use the informations below to transfer the money to any [name of bank] in U.S.A,just ask your bank to use any [name of bank] address in U.S.A,pls use the whole details below for the transfer.

[Repeat of Bank Account Info + street address for Nigerian bank]

Once more,i am sorry for my approach,it will not happen again.

Now, ordinarily at this point, failing to achieve some nice friendly chatty mails, I'd just let that go, and mark time until the Lad discovers that the bank transfer hasn't gone through. Then he would have something more to say for himself.

But in the two weeks timeframe of this Baiters Cup Dry Run, there isn't really the time for that. I need more substance to his mails.

If this Sad Burly Farmer is not attended to, then he will have to turn into Cross And Neglected and Feeling Used And Unsure About Sending The Money Now Farmer by tomorrow.

Last chance to do what he wants, Lad......

Quote:

Thank you, I don't really know anything about corresponding banks, so I thought I needed an address for that as well, I've never had to fill in that part of the form before. Thank you for the Nigeria bank address, I know what to fill in now, that's great.

I'll go and do that as soon as I can, it's a bit hectic here at the moment, because two of the WWOOFers have arrived, and about eight campers, so there's a lot to do. We provide three meals a day for the WWOOFers, and like to offer the campers a home-cooked evening meal, too, either indoors, or a barbeque when the weather is suitable.

These two WWOOFers know a fair bit about what they are doing and can get on without supervision, but when the French student arrives, well, they know nothing, so are going to require quite a bit of instruction and checking up on.

I do still feel very disappointed that you have no interest in real communication, or answering the little questions I asked about your trade, etc, and you ask no interested little questions in return.

I'm beginning to feel a bit like an ATM machine, which isn't good.

I do care about you and Chioma and the well-being of your unborn baby, but it feels as if you just don't care about building any relationship across the sea, but just see me as a source of money. That's really unusual to me. I'm accustomed to more warmth than that.

It's saddening.

But please extend my good wishes to Chioma. I hope she is keeping well and is not suffering from too much morning sickness. Tell her that it does pass quite soon, even if it doesn't feel like it at the time!

Juan's stalker Joined: 28 Aug 2008 Posts: 1423

What a nice slap Branwen, you sweet ATM machine you. Laughing

A sad and whining maga is not good for business, hope he sees the light and commences butt kissing ASAP Wink

Posted: Sat Aug 01, 2009 5:27 pm

Quote:

I'm beginning to feel a bit like an ATM machine, which isn't good.

Yeah why not, you're already an bank account killing machine.

@Scammy: You have impressed me, you make this lad work for his money.

Posted: Sun Aug 02, 2009 3:55 pm

I suppose the Lad is trying:

Quote:

I feel bad knowing that you believe that all i think about is your money,its not true my dear friend,your mails to me has been agreat source of relief,andi really appreciate you as a friend and a brother in the LORD,i really will love to make friends with you,you are now part of our lives and i love your friendliness and caring nature,please sendme the personal phone number,i wish to call you on phone,though international call is expensive over here but i will find away to give you a call,pls tell me more about yourself,do you have family?kids?,you said you farm for pleasure,is that also what you do for a living?were do you live?,please tell me more about youself,i hope i am not intruding in your private life,buti really want to make you my friend for life.

As for chioma,she normally complains of severe headache and fever,but an old woman thatis living near our compound said that,she will be ok in due time.

I once saved as a sales boy in a boutique that deals on clothings for men,so i wish to start up a mini boutique once i arrive Ghana safely with chioma,as i have already mastered the trade.

thank you for everything we love you. and chioma also sends her regards.

Get the violins out; my character tells of his sadnesses in life:

Quote:

Oh, I'm probably a bit over-sensitive. It was just beginning to remind me of back when I was at school, and when another boy wanted me to help him with his schoolwork, or lend him my bicycle for the weekend, he would talk to me. But as soon as I'd said, yes, he could borrow my bike, or as soon as I'd helped him with his homework, it was like he didn't want to know me anymore, couldn't be bothered to talk to me, he just ignored me.

There's a saying that your schooldays are the happiest days of your life, but they weren't in my case, I was always that fat boy who nobody spoke to, and the girls just laughed at.

I'm 41 now, but I only got married this year, on the 14th April, first time anyone has wanted to marry me. So no, I didn't have any children before, my wife Julie is expecting our first baby. (She's been married before, but didn't have any children, so it's her first too.) The baby is due to be born on the 5th or 6th of January.

I never had a telephone before I got married, there seemed to be no point, we can't use mobile phones here because we're too far out in the countryside, there's no phone masts to get a signal from, and a landline to the house seemed a waste of money, because I'm rarely in the house during the day, and usually go to bed early at night, so I'd never be there to answer it. Now I'm married though, and Julie is pregnant, I do want a phone in case of emergency (though I pray it will never be needed in that way), so we've already got things moving to have a landline connected. There's a slight hold up due to the trees around the property, which will interfere with the line (it's got to be overhead here, not underground) and there's a Tree Preservation Order on one that needs to be cut down, but we're in contact with both the council and with British Telecom, so are hoping it gets sorted soon. Certainly I'll be happy to have a little chat with you on the phone then, I can always ring you, to save expense, I'll let you know when we are all installed.

My father was a very successful businessman, with three businesses, including a printing works and an office supplies store. When he died, I sold the businesses and that, together with the money I inherited from him, means that I don't have any need to go out to work or earn any more money, I can just do whatever I want.

My father had also owned a fair bit of land, it was just laying there, neglected, so I decided to build it up into a good organic farm. It takes time, improving the fertility of the soil, and building up a breeding stock of animals, as well as developing the campsite I also run, but when it is done, as I think I mentioned before, I hope to make a gift of it to some young couple who would love to go into farming, but who cannot afford to buy a farm of their own. Then I will go and live in a little cottage somewhere, and just have pet animals and a little vegetable plot for our own use.

And hopefully lots of children!

Julie is 35 years old tomorrow, so we need to move quickly in producing our family!

Are you and Chioma planning to get married? Of course, you are already married in the eyes of God, but are you going to have a legal ceremony as well?

Yes, I'm sure the old woman in your compound is right, and Chioma will feel better again soon. Julie went through a feeling-unwell time, but that has passed now.

May God bless both of you, and the baby, and I pray that, when you are settled, your boutique business becomes most successful. But that, unlike my own father, who always seemed absent when I was growing up, you also have much time for your family.

Posted: Mon Aug 03, 2009 5:59 am

Lad reverts to form:

Quote:

I am very happy to hear from you,we willdefinately get married once i am settled financially,infact i intend to pay her bride price once i could get my hands on any money,you are a good man and i believe your wife loves you so much just like chioma loves me,i wish her a safe delivery on january,i also wish chioma would deliver safly too,i hope to hear from you tomorrow .

My regards to Julie.

Right: time to change tactics. Two can play at that game. My character can write short notes too. Note that he fails to mention anything about going to the bank and sending the money. We'll see if that provokes the Lazy Lad.

Quote:

What's a bride price? We don't have that sort of thing here? Is it compulsory?

It is Julie's birthday today, so I can't stop. I want to make it a special day for her.

Update:

Two hours later, the Lad writes back with birthday greetings for Julie:

Quote:

It julie birthday,and chioma and i wish her a happy birthday,long life,safe delivery and prosperity,tell her we all love her,please try to make her very happy today as it is a special day for her,i wish we are there with you to celebrate as one big happy family,you and your wife are like family to us right now and we will always love you.

Bride price is compulsory in the whole of african continent as it is a long aged tradition of the blacks,it means paying some amount of moneyto the father of the girl and performing some traditional kind of marriage,it must come first before any church or court marriage,by so doing,it is believed in africa that you have protected the woman`s pride and that you are capable of taking care of her.

Once again,send our unconditional love to julie

We wait to hear from you soon.

Master Baiter Joined: 23 Jan 2009 Posts: 241

This bait is getting so boring. I want to see pictures.

I got at least half a dozen Michael Jackson posters.

Posted: Tue Aug 04, 2009 7:07 am

Ramsey, I did warn in the thread discussing/planning this that my baits are always boring! I am never entertaining. Dull characters with dull lives, no trophies, nothing. Oh: except the occasional bank account. I do expect them still to be with me in half a year's time, however. At least.

Very Happy

So: today's boring epistle from my boring farmer:

Quote:

Thank you for your kind birthday wishes to Julie. I think she had a very nice day, and lots of visitors came with cards and presents and bottles of wine too!

Today we have our French student arriving to help on the farm, we already have two Americans staying, the volunteers all stay in the house, though we've also got a lot of campers in the field. It is raining today, though, so not nice weather for them.

What happens during a traditional African marriage? It sounds very interesting!

Julie and I got married in a registry office (maybe what you would call a court wedding), she'd been married before, and divorced, so unable to marry in church. We didn't have a big wedding or anything though, it was very low-key, just her parents and my best friends came along, and then we came back to this house here and had a few drinks and some food. And then had to go and feed and milk the animals!

It still felt very special though. I never thought anybody would want to marry me!

Does Chioma's father have to give permission for you two to get married? Will he be willing to do that after he has been so upset about her choosing you, and not a richer man?

Now, I need to stay here today to welcome the French student, and tomorrow will be a bit of a busy day, with doing some teaching and supervision of my volunteers, and then the church home group, so I'm thinking I will go to the bank on Thursday now, and get that money sent to you. I hope it gets there quickly for you, I'll ask at the bank how long it will take.

All good wishes to you and Chioma. I hope your work is going well and Chioma is feeling more comfortable.

May the Lord pour down His blessings on both of you and the growing baby.

Posted: Tue Aug 04, 2009 3:31 pm

Lad wrote:

Quote:

i am happy to hear from you,how is Julie and the baby doing?i hope they are in good health,in traditional marriage in africa,both the bride and the groom are dressed in a native attire,natural food and drink like palm wine is taking,there is also the breaking of kola nut which we believe bring us to union with our anscestors,after the ceremony the bride is then handed over to the groom according to custorm and tradition and the celeberation will continue till dawn with different kinds of traditional music troops for entertainment,and also a lot to eat and drink

I believe that chioma`s father will acept me once i prove myself financially capable of taking care of his daughter,he does not have a problem with me personally,he only has a problem with my poor state,he hates poor people with a persion,so if i could lay my hands on some good money,and start up my boutique,he will definately come to terms with me.

Please,while sending the money by thursday,ask your bank to make it a swift transfer so that the money could reflect immediately into the account.

My regards to your wife Julie.

Farmer-and-some-beer wrote back:

Quote:

Well, after the rainy start to the day, it's actually got out very hot. The French volunteer arrived about three hours ago, and I've been showing him round the farm, he's very nice and very polite, and speaks very good English, though, of course, has never learnt before the words to do with farming! So it has been more of an English lesson than anything. He was trying to teach me some French words too, but I'm not very good, I can't say those French Rs anything like right. We laughed a lot, in a nice sort of way.

Anyway, it got a bit too hot out there, so we've come in now for a couple of beers and some of Julie's lovely cakes, and I thought I'd take this opportunity to check my mails.

The traditional marriage ceremony sounds lovely.

My best friend, Desmond, he thinks that everyone should forget all about the old traditions and only do anything the way the Bible says. He thinks that old traditions are of the devil. I totally disagree with him though, I think there is so much richness and joy and history in the old traditions. I love the way so many people go to the old places of worship, from before Christianity came to this country, like people go to Stonehenge on the longest day of the year, to see the sun rise. Many churches here, too, have old traditions built into them, even images from the days before Christianity came here, gargoyles and Green Men, who people thought were spirits of the forest, protecting people's homes. We know now that that is not true, but there is still something really important there, about things that have always been important, safety and security and protection from harm.

What is your traditional music like? I would really love to know, I think music is at its best when its made by the people, rather than in professional recording studios where they adjust and adjust everything until it sounds so perfect. Music should be real, music should be of the people.

Is there a recording you could send me? Or a YouTube or website link or something?

It is so wonderful learning about your part of the world.

Yes, I'll certainly ask my bank to make the transfer the quickest way possible.

I'm so glad to hear that Chioma's father has nothing against you personally. I expect fathers of daughters always worry that their precious ones may not be looked after the way they deserve, so it is so understandable. But when all is sorted and you have shown that you will take good care of her, I'm sure he will be satisfied.

You seem a very responsible man to me. If my baby is a daughter, when she grows up, I hope she will meet an equally responsible and hard working and thoughtful man, when the time comes for her to choose a husband.

btw: SCAMMY! WHERE ARE YOU??!!!!

It's getting a bit lonely here!

419Eater is my life Joined: 15 Apr 2009 Posts: 296

Sorry, sorry, I've been on a business trip to Dubai, and... no, wait, that's not right. I've actually been getting drunk in a field whilst listening to rock music.

I am, however, back- and it's time to push for something spectacular in the last few days of the bait. Here's the story so far:

The Lad wrote:

Dear friend .

I do not know how you acquired the power of conviction, i must realy commend you on that, your idea is a very good one but i dont think its best for us, firstly, i have never been to air port all my life neither do i know any body that works there, besides you know am still on a hide out and am not supposed to expose my self to an open place, the worse of all,Air ports, after discusing this with chioma, we came to a conclusion that it will be better to source for an account for you to transfer the money to, by so doing, i will save myself the risk of exposing myself to danger and also save you the stress of flying all the way from Dubai to Nigeria, since the whole idea is for me to impress her father that i am rich, all i need do is to recieve the money, then i could get myself an italian suit and i can go and meet him to pay him the dowery in cash.

i think this is the best for us both, if you are comfortable with the arrangement, please tell me so i could source and send you the account details.

Regards.

Derek.

A few days later, the Lad wrote:

Dear ,
I have not had from you,is everthing ok? please write to me,we are worried about you.

Regards,

Derek.

I wrote:

Sorry about the delay, it has been crazy in Dubai!!!! We were staying in the Burj Al Arab, you should definitely stay there if you ever go, it is lovely!!!! It has really been a long party since Sunday night, they really know how to entertain you there, it was amazing. I think that is why they do so well in business, because they are so good at having fun with business people!!! I am feeling a bit ill now though hahaha!!!!!

I am sorry I couldn't email you earlier though, I didn't mean to worry you, but I have been busy!!!!!

I have read what you said about being worried about going to an airport because Chomia's father is powerful in Nigeria, but I don't think you need to worry!!!! If it helps at all I can go to an airport just over the border, that way it would be safe from him. Mark says that Cotonou is close and has an airport, we could meet you there or near to there easily. You don't need to worry about me having stress, to be honest it is better for me to break the journey up because it means I don't get jet lag, also I would love to meet you and Chomia too if she can make it.

I hope you reconsider!!!! I prefer to do things like this face to face, and if you like we can all go out on the town when I am there, I will show you a really good time!!!! Although it will be a different type of good time if Chomia is there too, if you know what I mean, hahaha!!!!

Actually I insist we do it, the more I think the better it sounds, you need to have a good time to take your mind off things too, I will get Mark to arrange things!!!!

I'm really running out of time for getting the safari out of him, but I'm offering a pretty big carrot which I plan to turn into an even bigger one with some ranting about limos and strippers later on, depending on his reaction. I'm hoping the idea of a debauched night out paid for by a stupid millionaire will be too much for any lad to resist.

With only a few days to go, though, I'm not sure. If I don't pull it off, I'm hoping to at least be able to even the score on bank accounts with my yet-to-be-used accountant character.

When is our deadline for this? 23:59 GMT on Friday?

EDIT: The bugger's stealing my ideas, too!

The Lad, to Branwen, wrote:

I believe that chioma`s father will acept me once i prove myself financially capable of taking care of his daughter,he does not have a problem with me personally,he only has a problem with my poor state,he hates poor people with a persion,so if i could lay my hands on some good money,and start up my boutique,he will definately come to terms with me.

"Please give me money, because he hates poor people". If I'd known he'd be picking up on that idea I would have put a little more effort into the de-education!

Posted: Tue Aug 04, 2009 6:45 pm

Glad to see you back, Scammy!

Yes, I think that 23:59 GMT on Friday is the ending.

I intend that my character will not have made it to the bank by then. He said that he would go on Thursday. But I know that there is a rail strike in his region on Thursday and Friday. For real:

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/england/8182993.stm

I love this, by the way. I love the differences between our styles of baiting. If any Brand New Baiters are reading, I hope that, never mind the competition-dry-run part, they see that there is more than one way to occupy a scammer - and amuse oneself at the same time.

The Baiters Cup (dry run) Scammy VS Branwen- BRANWEN WINS!!!	View next topic View previous topic