First Bait "The art of subtle(?) slapping'"

By joining our community you will have the ability to post topics and access other forums reserved for members. Registration is quick, simple and absolutely free. Join our community today by clicking here.

Posted: Wed Jul 21, 2004 8:14 am

Quote:

OK, this is my first bait. Nothing spectacular, no trophy other than the standard trunk boxes of cash and a scrungy deposit certificate, but I did manage to waste a little over 6 weeks of his time. My philosophy is simple, having a simple mind I play it cool and serious in order to waste as much time as possible without arousing suspicion. But I do have a rather dry sense of humour which comes through from time to time.

I was also suprised just how far my 'subtle' style of slapping got me.

Prince Michael Kabila
Callum the Womble
Security company
My comments

Right, here goes then...

7th May
From:Prince Michael
Av.Joaquin Vilumbrales,
(Madrid) Spain.

Greetings,

I am Prince Michael the son of the late Democratic Republic of Congo President Laurent Desire Kabila of the blessed memory.

I know this letter might come to you as a surprise but I honestly do not intend to surprise you. I write this letter in respect of my intention to invest the sum of US$28M(Twenty Eight Million United State Dollars) with you.

I inherited this money from my mother. This money was got through the exporting and sale of Diamond and Timber when my father was the head of state. My mother though not her legal wife used her privilege position to engage in the business of Diamond and Timber since she knows that her survival will depend on how much she can get out of the privilege situation.

When my father was assassinated on 16TH Jan. 01 by one of his bodyguards Lt. Rashidi Kasereke through the conspiracy of some top army officers that wanted to topple him.

I escaped to Madrid, Spain because of the fear that I might be arrested by my half brother Lt. General Joseph Kabila the present head of state.Actually his mother and my mother are not in the best of relationship because of who among them will be the first lady Tussle and this ultimately affected us their children.

My mother advised me to leave For Madrid, Spain where these funds were deposited for safe keeping with a Private Security Company here in pain.

On getting to Spain where I have been living since then as a political refugee I am seeking for a reliable foreigner who can come down to Madrid,Spain for a meeting and to clear the funds in his name as the solebeneficiary of the Consignment as I was afraid of being defraud.

Honestly I contacted you because I don't want to invest this money in Madrid Spain due to my status here as a political Refugee. And moreover I wouldn't want to take risk because this money is all that my Mother and I are depending on. My stepbrother Joseph, who is now the present leader of my country has seized all my father's assets and money He left us empty handed without knowing about this funds deposited with the Security Company here.

That is why I decided that investing this money abroad should be the best investment for me. I will be honored if I can be given the privilege of investing this money with you.

I expect you to be trustworthy and kind enough to respond to this distress call to save My Mother and I from a hopeless future. And if you agree, I agree to compensate your sincere and candid effort in this regard with 10% of the total amount of $28 million US Dollars.

When the money ($28 million) is moved into your discrete account. You will be allowed to draw 10% in your favor, while the remaining 90% will be invested meaningfully for our future if possible in your area of business and different sectors of the Economy in your country which are dividends yielding.

Whatever your decision is please reach me immediately, and keep this letter tight secret for the interest of my Family.

Best regards,
Prince Michael
Alternate e-mail: [email protected]

7th May
Dear Sir,

You recently sent to a relative of mine an email sent regarding a possible investment proposal. As he is not in position to be of any assistance in tis matter, he has forwarded your proposal to myself. I hold stakes in a number of investments and am always prepared to consider worthwhile opportunities as they present themselves.

I find your proposal of some interest and I shall take the necesssary steps to evrify the information contained therein, after due consideration of which I shall inform of my decision.

Yours sincerely,

Callum McReid

8th May
Dear Callum Reed,

Thanks for your response towards my proposal and your kind acceptance to assist my family and I in this very transaction. Please I want to assure that this transaction is 100% risk free.

Yeah, just like porcine aviation is the only way to travel and the moon tastes good on crackers!

My intention in this very mail is to break down the totality of this transaction and I believe that we may not need to waste time to move ahead immediately.

But where’s the fun in that? Impatient fellow, I said I would need to verify certain information first.

Honestly, I contacted you for this important business as a total stranger due to the need to involve a reliable foreigner who will come and act as the owner of this money and receive it in his account. I will forward your name and address to the Security Company for them to make you the beneficiary of the consignment.

The aforementioned sum ($28 million) was deposited in a trunk boxes with a Security Company here in Madrid as family treasures. I have also certified the existence of the consignment at the trust firm, but the labor law act of Spain does not allow me to operate a bank account or have access to such amount of money in my status as a political refugee.

For the above reason I decided to ask for assistance and help from you as a foreign partner who could come to Madrid, Spain for a meeting and I will take you to the Security Company for the clearance of the Consignment.

But before you come to Madrid, I have to forward your full name, your postal address, your private telephone and fax number to the Security Company for them to make you the new beneficiary to the consignment. As soon as you get the consignment out of the Security Company, you will instruct the Security Company to transfer the funds to your account.

I decided on...
Callum Moriarty McReid
Private Bag A58-096
Greenmount
6227 (SCAM on the phone backwards)
New Zealand
Ph (09) 303 0121 Fax (09) 303 0142 (which are numbers for the Serious Fraud Office)

I will be waiting for your response and I am attaching the picture my late father took the consignment before it was deposited with the Security Company.

Insert standard mugu trunk box photo here. "Oh, look, let’s play Monopoly!" I’ve seen it all before somewhere, Scam-O-Rama.com perhaps?

Yours sincerely,

Prince Micheal

10th May
Dear Michael,

(Is that an acceptable form of Address for a Prince, or should it be Your Royal Highness as required by the English?)

I have received your second email requesting that we move along with the proposed business at hand, but being a cautious man and much wiser for it I must be sure of the facts as I initially stated before making a decision.

I know someone who works for a large international law based out of London and I have been able to confirm the majority of the information contained in your original email of proposal I received. These last few years must have been a very traumatic time for you and the rest of your family given the unfortunate demise of your late father. However it does appear that any sort of involvement in the politics and business of African states and nations can be risky and the likelihood of such an unfortunate tragedy occurring is more a probability than a possibility.

The research conducted on my behalf does however raise some questions, and minor though they may seem in the overall schame of things, I would like more information before proceeding further.

1) You mention that your mother was not a legal wife and records show that your late father Joseph Kabila has two official wives. Without offense, does this mean that you are an illegitimate son? I ask this because I need to consider any possible legal ramifications this may incur with regard to your proposal. It is best to avoid the courts etc where possible.

A b*****d perhaps?

2) With reference to (1) above, if you are an illegitimate son, than this would explain why your name does not appear in any of the official reports and information relating to the tragic events of January 2001, and why only the children of Maanya and Sifa are named. Would this be correct?

3) I really don't think you need be concerned about the tussle between your mother, whose name I do not know, and your late fathers second wife. If your mother was not officially your father's wife then it would appear that she has no legal claim to be first lady and you should encourage her to put this worry behind her and move on. Perhaps it would help take her mind off such matters if you used some of the funds available to have her leave the DRC and join you in Madrid.

4) My London contact also mentioned that it is important for me to verify the existence and standing of the private security company before making any decision to proceed. Apparently some of the regulations regarding the operating of such entities in Spain can be interpreted to benefit the company more than the customer, sometimes allowing them to impose additional and unexpected fees. If you can provide the name of this company my contact will be able to use the legal resources available to check the background of the aforementioned company to ensure that there is little chance of unforeseen complications arising should I choose to go ahead with this business.

By the way, my London contact was wondering if they have finished work on the station yet? The last time she was in Madrid it was just a big hole in the ground which was very inconvenient.

They are or have been building a new station on the underground Metro network right outside his window. From the photos I’ve seen it would be hard to miss.

I await your response to the above.

Yours sincerely,

Callum McReid

11th May
Dear Callum McReid,
I got your mail and noted all the content. Callum, I suggest that we talk on phone so that I can answer all your questions.

Not likely, 11 hour time difference for one thing. Just get on and answer them via email your highness.

Callum, Please furnish me your direct contact number Telephone or cell Phone.

I am looking forward to your speedy response.

Regards,

Micheal. K.

12th May
Dear Michael,

I agree that it be ideal to talk on the phone but this time it would quite difficult. As there is an 11 hour time difference it will difficult for me to ensure that I will be available at a convenient time. There is also the matter of having the required privacy to discuss the matter discretely. My work requires me to travel quite a bit and it is illegal to use cell phones while driving or flying and my destination it is often an industrial factory or plant. Reception can often be very poor or non-existent due to all the steel and machinery around me. Not to mention the noise!

I think that it is best to continue by email at present at this will allow matters to be expedited to a greater extent than if relying on phone communication.

Regards,

Callum McReid

PS. As far as investment options go, you may be interested in this, http://www.feltex-ipo.co.nz, choose New Zealand as your country and enter 03, 04, 06, 07 or 09 as the area code. I have already instructed my broker to reserve an allocation for my own personal benefit. Although the shares are only available to New Zealand residents in the first instance, there are means by which the ownership can be transferred.

16th May
Dear Callum McReid,

Thanks for your mail. I am sorry for my late response towards your mail. I can't just understand you, Callum, we need to go straight to the point so as not to beat about the bush and waste time because delay might be dangerous. First, your contact phone number, atleast to know whom I'm dealing with, As I don't even know you.

Callum, If you are really interested in this transaction, lets fix an appointment in Athens, Greece for a meeting as well as see the consignment and conclude this transaction as I have means of moving the consignment through diplomatic mission.

Nice thought, but bound to be prohibitively expensive due to the Olympics. And I thought he wanted to meet in Madrid, which would be a lot closer to home. Closer to my legal contact if required too.

I await your response.

Regards,

Micheal

Time for a gentle slap...

16th May
Dear Michael,

It seems that what you do not perhaps understand is that I do not know you at all either, and one does become a successful businessman without exercising certain degree of prudence before committing to a certain course of action especially where large sums of money could be involved.

If it seems possible in your judgment that any delay could be 'dangerous' (whatever that might mean, the money seems to have been safely secured for quite some time now), then surely you can see the need to provide the necessary information for me to act. I simply will not act unless there is sufficient information at my disposal upon which I can make a sound and informed decision. I am certainly not going to fly half the way around the world, to a city where accommodation is becoming highly sought after and costly due to the approaching Olympic games, at a time when terrorist activity is a concern, to meet a complete stranger, when some very important facts are missing.

Any of my colleagues and associates will certainly vouch for the fact that I am not one who beats around the bush as you so succinctly put it, and I assure you that soon as I have the necessary facts at my fingertips I will quickly weigh up the pros and cons of the matter at hand and establish what I consider to be a suitable action plan.

I will not proceed any further without knowing what the situation is with regard to items (1) and (4) of my previous email. I await your response in this matter.

Will this kill it? Or will the charming Prince’s imagination spring into action and rescue the day?

Yours sincerely,

Callum McReid

No response, perhaps I have killed it. Only one way to find out…

18th May
Dear Michael,

I am still awaiting your response with regard to the details needed in order to proceed or otherwise with your proposal. I was led to believe this is a matter of some importance to you and that timing is of the essence. Do you still wish to proceed?

Regards,

Callum McReid

19th May
Dear Callum,

I got your mail and Yes I'm still interested in the transaction, Callum, I was thinking to have a meeting with you in Athens, Greece. If you can make it, you write and send me your schedule for to conclud this transaction at once.

I await your response.

Regards

Micheal.

20th May
Dear Michael,

I am glad to hear you are still interested in doing business. As pointed out previously it would be rather unwise for me to travel all the way to Athens at considerable expense without obtaining further details relating to this transaction first. I made enquiries regarding possible travel arrangements and assuming that the transaction could be completed in just one week, and in my experience such matters usually take longer, the cost could well amount to well over NZ$20,000. A single return airfare alone is NZ$8,307 excluding GST (I would be bringing along one of my business advisors to assist with the details), then there is accommodation and local expenses etc to consider as well.

I am currently on a job site (laptops are very handy!) and am waiting for sub-contractors to carry out some repair work so that I can continue my part of the work and thought I could spend the time reviewing your previous emails in case there was some relevant information I missed. Unfortunately I deleted the email you sent with the photo as it took up too much space in this account. Could you please send it again immediately so I can give it further thought today while I have the opportunity?

Also, I would imagine that some sort of certificate of deposit or account statement would have been issued by the security company at the time of securing the funds. Would it be possible to obtain a copy of this documentation? That way at least we will have some hard facts available.

Let’s see how good his scanning and editing skills are.

Regards,

Callum McReid

PS. The Feltex IPO closes next week. Although I have applied for my personal allocation of shares we have probably missed out on this particular opportunity. However there are two more major share floats on the NZX coming up in June, media company CanWest are hoping to raise $143m, and appliance and home furnishing retailer Noel Leeming $150m.

21st May
Dear Callum,

I have gone through your mail, and honestly I contacted you for this important business as a total stranger due to the need to involve a reliable foreigner who will come and act as the owner of this money and receive it in his account.

I have to forward your name and your full contact details (Address and direct phone number) to the Security Company for them to make you the beneficiary of the consignment and a certificate of deposit will be issued to you personal, which you will present to the security company before the clearance of the Consignment.

Callum, there is nothing to worry about this transaction will be completed in about 5 days.

I look forward to your speedy response and I expect you to furnish me with the required information and your flight schedule as I'm ready to move to Greece.

Regards,

Michael.

N.B: ATTACHED IS THE PICTURE OF THE CONSIGNMENT BEFORE IT WAS DEPOSITED WITH THE SECURITY COMPANY.

Same mugu photo 101 of trunk boxes

22nd May
Dear Michael,

My details as required by the security company follows. May I make it clear that I am only providing these details in order to expedite the provision of further details by yourself. Aside from a photo of unconfirmed and somewhat doubtful origin (in the opinion of an experienced photographer it appears to be a scan from printed matter), I still have no proof that any funds exist. This is a rather strange way of doing business and I hope that the forthcoming documentation from the security company will be of far greater benefit towards making my decision.

Callum Moriarty McReid
Private Bag A58-096
Greenmount 6227
New Zealand
Ph (09) 303 0121 Fax (09) 303 0142

I await further developments.

Including faked documents

Regards,

Callum McReid

24th May
Dear Callum,

I got the information you sent I will proceed to the security company this morning to change the previous information to your own name as the original owner of the consignment.

What previous information I wonder? Sounds iffy, perhaps I should ask for a legal opinion. Not reaction to my comment about the photo either.

I will keep you inform as soon as I finish with them.

Regards

Micheal

25th May
Dear Michael,

What previous information are you talking about?

Regards,

Callum McReid

25th May
Dear Callum,

What I mean by previous information was that the money was registered under my name, but due to my status as a political refugee, the labor law of Spain does not allow me to operate a bank account or have access to such amount of money.

For the above reason I decided to ask for assistance from you as a foreign partner if you could come down to Madrid, Spain for a meeting and I will take you to the security company for the clearance of the consignment.

I await your schedule.

Regards,

Michael.

26th May
Michael,

Sorry for sending this twice but I forgot to use the spell checker and when I'm tired I make a lot of mistakes. I just don't want there to be any confusion because of my fingers hitting the wrong keys. Not that I think there will be as you seem like an educated man with a good grasp of the english language, archaic though it may be at times (I always think that Spanish sound much better too).

Cheers,

Callum

Dear Michael,

I think I understand what you are trying to do. Your mothers money was taken out of the DRC and deposited in Madrid under your name, but you are unable to move the money on because of your status as a political refugee, so you want to transfer the ownership of the funds to myself, after which I can then move the funds to another country (in this case New Zealand). Then I keep 20% of the money while investing the other 80% in your behalf.

Just a couple of questions then;
1) If it is illegal for you to access these funds yourself, how is it possible for you to be able to transfer the ownership?

2) I was also wondering exactly why you require my assistance - surely it would be far more expeditious not to mention a lot less risky to set up an offshore holding company in Bahamas, Bermuda, even one of the Baltic states which would be closer to home, and simply transfer ownership of the funds to that company Then you would be able to access them without any problem. I believe it only costs around US$35,000 to US$90,000 to do this depending on the level of confidentiality required. Wouldn't this make more sense?

3) Previously you mentioned meeting in Athens, has there been a change of plan at your end? Before I can commit to the travel, I first of all need to have some proof that everything has been arranged with the security company first. Could you please provide copies of the relevant details and documentation supporting this. This is absolutely critical to my arrangements.

Really would like to see if he’s any good at forgery as well as lying.

4) Also, who is going to cover the expenses? With US$28,000,000 available, I suggest that it is only fair that any expenses are paid for out of the funds in question.

4) I would also like to seek the legal opinion of someone familiar with Spanish commercial law in regard to this transaction. Here in New Zealand the transferring of such a large sum of money will come under close scrutiny by both our Inland Revenue Department and NZ Customs Office especially where hard currency is involved and I am sure that Spain is no different in this regard. I need to be certain that there will be no perceived problems with the origin of the funds once the consignment is available for shipment from Madrid, and then entry into New Zealand (I can probably handle the customs side at this end, but there are costs in bringing in foreign cash). Unfortunately I do not have any legal contacts other than a researcher a London, and I imagine that as a refugee you will have had dealings with a reputable law firm or barrister. You wouldn't believe how many lawyers it takes to get refugee status here in New Zealand!

If he’s playing true to form there would usually already be a lawyer involved. Time to stir his creativity.

I trust you will be able to provide some assistance in the above matters so that we may keep things progressing.

Oh, how is your mother fairing? The other day I saw an item in a newspaper about some volcano eruption, Namulagira (I think that's the correct spelling), I hope she is not affected by this. Maybe all the more reason why she join you in Spain. I guess you need the funds first though, then we can arrange something for her.

Oops, bit of a faux pas I’m afraid. I’ve just realised he ‘inherited’ the money from his mother, therefore she must be deceased. Doubt he’ll remember himself though, so I’ll apologise for any insensitivity on my part later.

Regards,

Callum

26th May
Dear Callum,

How could you give me wrong information? (Phone number) I called the number you gave me yesterday and was told that there is no body like Callum works there and also they don’t even know the name (CALLUM) and up till now, I am shot of words. I don’t know my faith any longer and to be sincerely speaking, this is not the right way of doing business.

Too true... I don’t work at the Serious Fraud Office, he should be shot, I don’t know his faith either, and this definitely not how to do business.

I want to let you know that my family and I trusted you and believe that you will not betray us.

Please I want you to bear in mind that you are not just doing me a favor rather you are also going to benefit from it. At the same time I am not forcing you to do business with me because you are an adult and know what it takes a man to become rich.

Finally, if you receive this mail and have made up your mind not to proceed with this transaction, please kindly write me the last time and declare your intension and as well as sending me a POWER OF ATTORNEY so that I will look for another partner to finish it up.

The reason why I need the power of attorney is because all the documents involve in this transaction is currently under your name and as well some body can claim it from where you stopped and forge a driving license or an international passport under your name for identification and do it for me.

Forgery? Deception? Naah, surely not.

Why I am sounding this way, is not as if I don’t know what to do, but just that I was trying to be sincere with you.

So please I want you to read this mail and get back to me as soon as possible.

Regards,

Michael.

27th May
Michael,

As I think I mentioned previously my work requires me to travel a bit and I think I mistakenly gave you a phone number for one of the job sites I am currently working on as that is usually the best way to contact me. They probably didn't think to check the visitors/contractors register to see if I was there or not. If it was a 303, 272 or 06 number that may explain it and if so I apologize for possibly making a genuine mistake.

But only possibly…

Perhaps you could try my mobile 021 752 503 but I can't always answer my phone due to noise or sometimes I am required to turn it or hand it in when working in a hazardous environments, so you may have try a few times. Fires or explosions never impress clients and cell phones have been known to blow up entire chemical factories! It may be best if you try between 6pm and 7pm as I am usually finished work by then.

Tea time here, 2am in the morning there. Anyway, enough of Mr Nice Guy, time to start being firm. If he has lost his faith, then I don’t see why I shouldn’t start losing my patience.

By the way, you are quite correct about this not being the right way of doing business. I still have absolutely NO PROOF AT ALL that the money even exists apart from that photo! Even when I work with contracts worth only a few thousand dollars there is always documentation provided at the very beginning so that all parties know exactly what is going on. If, as you say, the documents have been prepared in my name, then I have the legal right to view those documents and I therefore INSIST that you send me copies as soon as possible. Only after the receipt of such documents will then I be prepared to take this transaction to the next stage. I trust you are in a position to assist in making these documents available as I would rather our relationship was based on trust rather than my having to resort obtaining the documents by means of a subpoena through the Spanish courts.

I have so far provided everything you have asked for, apart from this one possible mistake, while you still have not answered some of my questions. A partnership requires that we trust each other and are open about all things. This I am trying to do but I think you could try harder. Don't get me wrong, I do wish to keep proceeding, but you must understand that all the information can not be kept one-sided if we are to work together on this.

Regards,

Callum

27th May
Dear Callum,

I got your mail and I am going to the security company to pass your cell phone number before they call another person as the hope my family and I have.

In case they contact you, The consignment was registered as a family tresures.

I will get back to you.

Stay in touch

Michael.

27th May
Michael,

Just make sure that they understand no documents, no deal.

Cheers,

Callum

28th May
Callum,

I don't understand your last mail. Please explain.

Michael.

27th May
Michael,

Just make sure that the security company understands that they must provide copies of the consignment documentation which has been prepared in my name, otherwise I will not be proceeding with any transaction.

Callum.

28th May
Callum,

Every documentation has been done under your name. I am waiting for your arrival for us to proceed in clearing the consignment.

I await your schedule.

Regards,

Michael.

Right, enough beating about the bush.

29th May
Michael,

Is it you or the security company that does not understand English? How many times do I have to tell you, that without any proof, without any copies of the documentation, then I will not proceed further! Why is this so hard for you to comprehend? Do think I am so stupid that I will spend thousands of dollars traveling half the way around the world without any documentation? If so then you insult my intelligence as a businessman and I most definitely have not got to where I am today by being stupid.

Email of fax me me copies of the documents immediately! Confidential fax to 1-707-361-0284 is necessary. Either way I must see the documents before I make any schedule. If the security company is being difficult then give me their email details and I will sort this out with them directly.

If after my genuine mistake you are losing your faith, then I am certainly beginning to lose my patience. What can be so hard about sending me a copy of the documents? For the last time, NO DOCUMENTS, NO DEAL!!!!!!!!

Callum.

Next step is ‘legal action’ to obtain this documentation, which being in my name, I am legally entitled to.

29th May
Callum,

Ok, You can reach Mr.Jones on 34 62 9918 636. The director in the security company. Please, you must have to be careful with what ever you are doing as this is the only money my mother and I have. Our last hope and Please don't betray the trust we have bestowed on you.

I feel like Obie Wan Kanobie, “Please hurry, you are our last hope”. Bet Carrie Fisher looks better than Mr Kabila though. Guess this means I’ll have to keep my lawyer in reserve for the meantime.

Please, let me know your out come with Mr.Jones after calling him.

I am standing by,

Standing by to what? Answer the phone as Mr Jones? Not a very original name is it. It’s not even Spanish!

Michael.

29th May
Michael,

You still don't understand. E M A I L details for Mr Jones please. That way I do not have to explain why I am calling Spain which for me would be most unusual and you seem intent on keeping this matter as confidential as possible.

Callum.

30th May
Callum,

Here is Mr.Jones email: [email protected]. ,Phone: 34 629 918 636.

Michael.

31st May
Dear Mr Jones,

You are currently holding a consignment of family treasures deposited sometime before June 16th, 2001, the ownership of which has been transferred from Prince Michael Kabila of Madrid to myself, Callum Moriarty McReid, on or before the 26th of May this year (a copy of the confirmation from Mr Kabila has been forwarded for your reference).

I have been trying to obtain copies of the relevant documentation in order to confirm that the transfer of ownership has been made and that all is above board before I make arrangements for collection of the consignment. So far I have been prevented from making such arrangements as I have not yet received copies of the relevant documentation. Mr Kabila has instructed me to contact yourself directly regarding this matter.

I trust that you are able to be of some assistance to me in this matter.

Kind regards,

Callum McReid

31st May
DEAR SIR,
I AM IN RECEIPT OF YOUR MAIL AND HERE BY CONFIRM OF THE CONSIGNMENT UNDER OUR CUSTODY DEPOSITED AT OUR BRANCH OFFICE IN ATHENS, GREECE, REGISTERED ON YOUR NAME FROM MR. MICHEAL KABILA. WE HAVE BEEN TRYING TO GET IN CONTACT WITH YOU SIINCE TO ADVICE ON THE PROCEDURES TO ENABLE YOU COLLECT YOUR CONSIGNMENT, BUT UNFORTUNATELY THE TELEPHONE NUMBERS GIVEN TO US BY MR. KABILA DOES NOT GO THROUGH.
HOWEVER I ADVICE THAT YOU CALL ME ON MY SPANISH TEL. NUMBER 34 62 99 18 636 FOR FURTHER ADVICE AND DIRECTIVES.
YOURS FAITHFULLY,
MR. DON JONES.
DIRECTOR INTERNATIONAL OPERATIONS DIVISION,
GLOBAL SECURITY AND FINANCE CO.

Oh dear, I have been afflicted with the dreaded CAPS LOCK... And by checking IP's I can confirm I now have two mugus on the line, one actually in Madrid, and one actually in Greece, which was a little suprising

31st May
Dear Callum,

Please, have you contacted Mr.Jones? If not contact him now.
Phone:34 6299 18636.
Email: [email protected].

I am standing by

Michael.

31st May
Dear Mr Jones,

Thank you for your prompt reply. I did receive a call from yourselves at 6:39pm on the 28th of May which I answered but no one was there. In fact my phone was called twice from your number. I am glad to hear that you think you do indeed hold a consignment on my behalf, however you present me with the same dilemma as does Mr Kabila.

To date I have had no proof whatsoever apart from the attached photo that there is actually any consignment, let alone that it is registered under my name. I am not imply that any dishonesty has taken place, but it is most unusual that no proof has been provided, even though I am legally entitled to copies of any documentation that exists in my name. I am therefore most insistent that before I make any further arrangements that documented proof of the transfer of ownership from Mr Kabila to myself is provided. As he seems either unable or reluctant for some reason to provide the documentation I require, he suggested that I contact you. Surely you are in a position to help with this.

However if you are also unable or unwilling to provide this documentation then I shall be forced to consider whatever further action is required to secure my legal position.

Regards,

Callum

2nd June
Dear Mr Jones,

When will you be sending copies of the documentation? You can either email to this address or fax copies to 1-707-361-0284 to maintain confidentiality.

Regards,

Callum McReid

2nd June
Michael,

I have twice contacted the security company but there has still not been any provision of the documentation which you have assured me has been prepared in my name. Mr Jones was able to confirm they are holding a consignment for me though but has not responded since even though he has my email and confidential fax details. That being the case I am still not prepared to make any travel arrangements until I have proof in my hand.

As you are closer to Mr Jones than I am, could you please try to find out what the problem is. We both need him to provide the documents so that we can progress the transaction. Next Monday is a public holiday and I may be going away for a while so I would really like the documents before then.

Nothing yet, so perhaps a little pressure to keep things moving.

Regards,

Callum

3rd June
Michael,

I have had no reply yet from Mr Jones or yourself. Are we still progressing towards the transaction?

Callum

Sent this to his alternative email address to make sure it works.

3rd June
Callum,

I wonder what was going on. I suggest that you call him on phone.

Oh, but I did, and all I got was an automated message in Spanish from some female. Probably the Telecom equivalent of “Our lines are currently overloaded try again later”.

Michael.

3rd June
Michael,

I have tried calling several times today but all I get is a message from some woman in Spanish which I do not understand a word of. I wonder what is going on too. Do you think he is away? Perhaps he has gone to Athens. I don't know what else I can do, I can't call him successfully and he hasn't answered my emails. This is becoming a problem for us.

Callum.

3rd June
Dear Mr Jones,

I have tried calling your office several times today but all I get is a message in Spanish which I do not understand. Did you receive my last email? I really do need the documentation as soon as possible. Your level of service is somewhat below what I would expect from an international company. Please let me know what is going on.

Regards,

Callum McReid

3rd June
Michael,

I am still having no luck in contacting or hearing from Mr Jones, I still get the message in Spanish. This is simply not good enough and not what I would expect of an international company. If I haven't heard from him by Friday afternoon I'll ask my London law firm contact to recommend one of their local associates and we can take it from there.

Obviously this will incur some cost. Would you be happy to share any costs if this is what it takes to obtain the documentation in order to proceed?

Callum

3rd June
Callum,

Please don't take any step until I tell you do. As we have to be careful before losing my money in the security company.

So I suggest that you should hold on.

Nah, I’m finally about to run out of patience.

Just keep trying.

Michael.

3rd June
DEAR SIR,
I AM PRESENTLY IN ATHENS, GREECE AND WILL MAKE OUT TIME TO LOOK AT YOUR PROBLEM, YOU CAN REACH ME DIRECTLY ON 30 69 45 281 779. CALL ME.
YOURS FAITHFULLY,
MR. DON. JONES
FOR GLOBAL SECURITY AND FINANCE CO.

3rd June
Callum,

Mr.Jones went for a visit in Greece, but you can reach him on this number:30 6945 281779. Please try call him and get back to me. Callum, I think that Mr.Jones was afraid to release the certificate to you without your presence.

I suggest that you make your traveling arrangement to Madrid. I will personally take you to the security company for the issuing and clearing of the consignment. From there, we proceed with the investment project.

I am standing by.

Michael.

3rd June
Michael,

What is this? How could Mr Jones possibly be afraid of releasing the documents? If I was asking for the original paperwork then fair enough, I could then understand why he may be concerned. But to not send a scan or fax COPY is just RIDICULOUS.

In all my business dealings with international fund transfers and shipment of industrial equipment worth millions of dollars I have NEVER come across such a situation, even when working on government funded projects. Sure, everyone requires the original documents at the time of actual transaction, but to not provide COPIES so that all parties can CHECK THE DETAILS and make sure they are correct BEFORE the transaction takes place to AVOID ANY POSSIBLE PROBLEMS later is unheard of. In my opinion your late father could have made a far better choice than to deposit the consignment with Global Security And Finance Co., they do not appear to be professional at all.

How many times do I have to tell you and Mr Jones that I WILL NOT MAKE ANY TRAVEL ARRANGEMENTS UNLESS I HAVE COPIES OF THE DOCUMENTATION FIRST!!! I suggest that Mr Jones GET HIS ACT TOGETHER!!!

Is he thick or what?

As I said, if I do not have copies of the documentation by Friday morning I will take further action to ensure that Mr Jones does not mess us around any more.

Callum.

3rd June
Dear Mr Jones,

In all my business dealings where the international transfer of funds and shipment of industrial equipment worth millions of dollars has been required, I have NEVER come across a situation even when working on large government funded projects where any party has been unwilling to provide COPIES of the relevant documentation so that all concerned can check the details before the actual transaction takes place. I don't know how you work in your part of the world, but in rest of it this is just normal business practice.

I can understand that if was asking for the original documents, just as I am required to provide original Bill Of Lading for release of freight shipments, then you may be concerned as we do not know each other and I could possibly use the documents incorrectly. But that is not what I am asking. All I am asking for is a COPY, either emailed or faxed, so that I check the details before making further arrangements. PLEASE HAVE COPIES SENT POST HASTE!!! Photocopy and clearly mark the copies with a big red pen if you like so there can be no mistake that what I receive is not original and can't be used in a wrong manner, but whatever you do, SEND THEM!!!

It is also only fair to inform you that as you do not appear to be carrying out your duties in a professional manner and have not been forthcoming at all and are subsequently causing delays to the business that Mr Kabila and myself are working together towards. Further delays are not acceptable and if I do not receive the necessary documents Friday morning, 4th of June 2004, then I shall initiate legal action to ensure that my legal right to access copies of all and any documents existing in my name is upheld.

May I suggest that you give your prompt and undivided attention to this matter.

Regards,

Callum McReid

4th June
Callum,

Call Mr.Jones on the number I gave you in today.

Michael.

4th June
Michael,

But I HAVE tried the number you gave me and although it was answered I could not hear anybody. You have given Mr Jones my details, so why can't he call me? Why should I spend my money calling him when HE is the reason for the delay? He is being very un-professional and I am running out patience with the man.

Callum.

4th June
Callum,

So what are we going to do. Mr.Jones is the only person that will assist in this transaction. Callum, we have to wait until he answers your mail or return to Madrid. Another option, is to be in Madrid for the clearance, But you said that you can't travel without the documentation.

I don’t believe it! He’s finally figured it out, no documents no travel! Advance to top of class Mikey boy.

Just keep on trying.

Michael.

4th June
All right Michael, I will give Mr Jones until midday Monday to respond with the documents. But after that I will not stand for any further delays and will instruct my lawyer to proceed as necessary.

Callum

4th June
Mr Jones,

Mr Kabila has requested that I give you more time to respond with the documents. If it was up to me my lawyer would already be talking to you, but Mr Kabila has convinced me to wait until midday Monday.

However at precisely midday on Monday 7th June 2004 I shall be instructing my lawyer to take whatever steps are required to secure the documentation on my behalf unless copies have been provided before that time.

I trust that your position as Director of International Operations will allow you to make whatever arrangements are necessary to avoid us having to get into a legal confrontation with regard to this matter. If not, then so be it, enough time has been wasted already.

Regards,

Callum McReid

4th June
DEAR SIR,
I AM WORKING ON INSTRUCTION AND WILL APPRECIATE IT IF YOU CAN COME PERSONALLY TO ATHENS, GREECE AND SEE THINGS YOURSELF. I WILL TRY TO SEE TO YOUR REQUEST BUT WILL NEED VERBAL APPROVAL FROM MR. KABILA, PLEASE TELL HIM TO CALL ME AND I WILL ALSO LIKE TO HEAR FROM YOU VERBALLY, BEFORE I PROCEED.
YOURS FAITHFULLY,
MR. DON JONES

4th June
Dear Callum,

I spoke with Mr. Jones today and He told me that he has to channel every arrangement to Athens, Greece because since September 11th attack in United States, that the Spain government is monitoring every money transaction in Spain. So to avoid problem he has to channel everything to Greece where the security company has a branch office and from there we proceed with banking transaction and investment project.

And the authorities in Greece won’t be monitoring things? With the Olympics about to start?

The certificate will be issued to you some time next week. I had a discussion with my mother on the delays of clearing the consignment, she wasn’t happy on how the transaction is being handling. She also told me that we should stay in contact with Mr. Jones that he was my father’s good friend and he is the only person that will assist in clearing the consignment from the security company due to my political status in Madrid.

Ah, so she’s not dead after all. Or is he dabbling in the occult?

Please send me your flight schedule as soon as you receive the certificate from the security company. One more thing, you must be calling Mr. Jones on phone until the consignment is being cleared from the security company.

I am standing by,

Michael.

5th June
Michael,

Mr Jones has finally replied to my emails! He will process the documents but needs us both to call him first to give him your approval to proceed. You call him from your end and I will try again. If I still have trouble calling him by phone I will send him written instructions when I get back from holiday next week (I leave today and will be gone for a few days, hopefully it will stop raining).

Hopefully things will now start to proceed more smoothly now that Mr Jones has finally got the message and is willing to cooperate.

Callum

5th June
Dear Mr Jones

I am glad to hear that you are finally prepared to assist with the documentation. This will save both of us any unnecessary expense and aggravation with lawyers and the like.

Which is a shame, but I’m sure there will some aggravation at some stage.

I have asked Mr Kabila to call you, and I will try to do so myself before I leave for my holiday (I will be away for a few days). If I can't contact you over the phone as I seem to be having difficulty with international call s at present I will send you a formal written request regarding copies of the documents so that you have something on file to avoid any procedural difficulties at your end. I will not have time to do this before I leave, but will do so as soon as I am back at my home office.

My turn to stall. Let them sweat for a good week or so.

Regards,

Callum McReid

8th June
Dear Mr Jones,

I have just arrived back from my holiday earlier than expected, the weather was not nice, and have tried phoning but sadly without success. Please send me the address of your registered office so that I can send to you ASAP the authorization to release the documentation I require in order to progress this matter further.

I have it here waiting and signed to give you authority but just need this one detail.

Regards,

Callum McReid

10th June
Dear Mr Jones,

I need your address for the authorization to provide the copies of the documents. I finally thought you had got the message and were going to help us move things along and proceed. Why now the delay? I find it most annoying that you continue to delay the business at hand. This simply is not good enough.

I will resort to legal means to obtain these documents if I have to, so do not push your luck any further! Give me the address for one of your offices ASAP!

Regards,

Callum McReid

10th June
Michael,

Mr Jones continues to cause us delays. I can't contact him on the phone and so need to email him written approval to release the documents but he refuses to give me any address that I can send it to.

I get the feeling Mr Jones actually carries very little weight within the company despite his lofty title.I have had enough of him! Is there anyone else at Global Security And Finance Co. your late father knew that we can deal? Someone who is actually able help us proceed rather than continue to mess us around?

If we can't proceed soon I shall give up as we are getting nowhere and there are other matters I must give attention to.

I bet he doesn’t want that to happen!

Callum

10th June
Dear Callum,

I got your mail today and I'm very glad to hear from you.

How was your trip? Hope fine.

Mr. Jones is the only man that will assist us in this very transaction, Please Callum; you don't have to give up, as we are almost at the last stop and also all the documentation are currently under your name.

I spoke with Mr. Jones about the delay and he told me that he was busy, working very hard to ensure that we will not have any difficulties in clearing the consignment.

Callum, I can’t understand what you meant that you can’t reach Mr. Jones on phone in Athens. Try and call him today on phone in Athens because I’m sure that he wouldn’t be checking his mail everyday as he told me on phone that he was very busy and working hard to see that we have no problem in clearing the consignment.

Contact him now on 30 6945 281779 and get back to me.

I am standing by,

Regards,

Michael

N.B: YOU HAVEN’T TOLD ME WHEN YOU’RE COMING FOR THE CLEARANCE OF THE CONSIGNMENT.

Ah, he SHOUTS at last. Let’s see if I can get him to shout some more…

11th June
Michael,

How many times do I have MAKE THIS CLEAR! Shall I spell it out for you?

N O C O P I E S O F T H E D O C U M E N T S I M M E D I A T E L Y, N O T R A V E L, L A W Y E R W I L L O B T A I N F O R M E I F N E C E S S A R Y!

As for Mr Jones, if he can't spend 5 minutes at a fax machine to send me the copies then he is a bloody amateur and should be sacked immediately.

The documents have supposedly been available in my name since May 26th, that was two weeks ago and I STILL HAVE NOT SEEN THEM! Why is this? I simply do not understand why it is so difficult to send me a copy of the documents to prove that he is worthy of my trust before I make any further arrangements. Do he want me to trust him or not? I am beginning to wonder about him.

I am tired of been messed around by this buffoon and will be instructing my lawyer immediately I have sent this email.

Callum

11th June
Mr Jones,

I have just tried calling you again and still no success. That has got beyond a joke. I reached the end of my tether, I have had enough, I am sick and tired of your uncooperative attitude! Mr Kabila informs me that he has called you to say why the further unexplained delays and I quote "he told me on phone that he was very busy and working hard to see that we have no problem in clearing the consignment."

My reply to that is BOLLOCKS! You have not been very busy, you have not been working very hard, and we certainly do have problems clearing this consignment. And as far as I can make out the biggest problem is YOU. Let me make myself quite clear;

NO DOCUMENTS FROM YOU IMMEDIATELY, THEN MY LAWYER WILL ACT TO SECURE THEM!

The documents have supposedly been available in my name since May 26th, that was two weeks ago! Yet I have not seen them yet. Why? Is this because they do not exist? Is it because you are trying to screw us both? What the hell is going on? Please explain, and it had better be good!

Callum

PS. I suggest you contact your lawyer because my lawyer is going to want to speak to him!

11th June
Michael,

I called a lawyer at international firm xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx Madrid office this afternoon and he says we have a good case against Mr Jones and Global for not releasing my documents. Their rates seem reasonable so I have faxed him a letter authorizing him to take action against Global Security And Finance Co. in my behalf and do whatever it takes within reason to get the documents released so that we can keep things moving.

I also asked him whether or not we could claim damages against Global if it turns out that Mr Jones's slack conduct prevents us from successfully releasing the funds. He seemed to think we have a good chance if it comes to that, so as least we can still get some return for our efforts. I can send you a copy of the letter if you like.

Before he can act he needs an original copy of thexxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx contract which he faxed to me returned. Apparently this is usual procedure for new international clients so hopefully TNT will be open on Saturday (tomorrow) and I can send it then. It will only take a few days at most for it to arrive, so we should see some action towards the middle of next week.

By the way I have taken the liberty of giving him your name as a contact in case he needs more details other than those in the emails I have forwarded to him. You can contact him on his direct line +34 91 590 2592 if needed (his name is Joaquin Echanove), but I am sure everything will work out in our favor.

It's a pity I have to do this, but Mr Jones has been given plenty of opportunity to cooperate but has refused to do so. He must learn to live with the consequences.

Regards,

Callum

11th June
Mr Jones,

Expect to hear from them next week. They are just waiting on my courier package to arrive.

And attached my two page letter to the lawyer.
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v349/malreid3500s/Kabila/Kabilaglobal-ssdje01pg1.jpg
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v349/malreid3500s/Kabila/Kabilaglobal-ssdje01pg2.jpg

11th June
Dear Callum,

I got your mail and I'm not happy about the way you are handling this transaction. I told you to hold on; that Mr. Jones was very busy and working hard to ensure that we have no problem in clearing the consignment, but you wouldn’t listen, rather you went to an extent of involving another partner.

Callum, Please call off your arrangement with the international firm you involved in this very transaction because I wouldn't find it funny with you if I loose my money. I told you that the Spain government is monitoring every transaction since the Sept 11 attack in United States, that's why Mr. Jones channel every arrangement to Athens to ensure that we have no problem.

Callum, If you can’t follow my instruction, or if you think that you can lay claims on the consignment in the security company with your contacts, Callum, I guarantee you that you’re going to loose.

Only because you can’t fight what ain’t actually there.

One more thing, the money can't be cleared from the security company without my knowledge and Mr. Jones, if you still interested in this transaction you write me because I'm going to call Mr. Jones, to tell him to hold on for a while as I'm now suspecting you.

I await your speedy response.

Regards,

Michael.

11th June
Michael,

Let me make this quite clear. MR JONES IS THE PROBLEM WE HAVE. He is the key to all this. If he can provide copies of the documents in time, then I can call off the lawyer. Otherwise, tough luck for Global and Mr Jones.

The law firm knows only what they have to know. I have not revealed anything to them other than the emails which only mention that the documents are available, that Global holds them, and that Mr Jones refuses to cooperate. They do not know and do not need to know the nature of the transaction, ammount involved or the source of the funds. Even if I had told this to Joaquin he would not be able to reveal this to any other party as he himself is legally bound by lawyer/client cofidentiality. In fact I included a clause to ensure our protection in this regard within the Engagement of Legal Services contract I have completed (I was unable to make it to the TNT office in time today but I will be able to send it on Monday).

Mr Jones has got away with a lot so far, and I think it is time he was bought to his senses.

Callum

13th June
Dear Callum,

Before we proceed, we assure me that you will not disappoint me and this transaction will be handled according to my instructions.

Attached document is the deposit certificate you will present to the security company in Athens, Greece before the clearing of the consignment. I got a confirmation that the consignment has been moved from Madrid, Spain to Athens, Greece.

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v349/malreid3500s/Kabila/Kabila_depositcertificate.jpg

Lovely picture, so obviously fake, and dear oh dear, my name isn’t spelt correctly. Time for another go at Mr Jones.

Callum, Call Mr. Jones and tell him when you are coming the clearance and also send your schedule for me to make my traveling arrangement to Athens, Greece.

One more thing, remember to come with a valid identification (Driving license of International passport).

I await your response and schedule.

Regards

Michael.

14th June

Michael,

At last! Mr Jones has finally done his job! I will call Mr Echanove and tell him that there is now no need to proceed with legal action. However we now have another problem, and again it seems to be Mr Jones who has created it. My name as it appears on the certificate is not correct. It reads Callum Moriaty Mc Ried when it should read Callum Moriarty McReid. This will not match any legal form of identification I have and therefore renders the certificate useless as far as I am concerned. I shall have words with Mr Jones about this. The man is clearly totally inept and I certainly hope we are not paying him anything because he doesn't deserve it.

The certificate is also from Global Security And Finance Ltd, not Co., and down the bottom says Global Security Ltd, which is all very confusing and will be mentioned later if he is so kind to send me another copy.

We may even eventually be able to get somewhere in this transaction.

But don’t hold your breath!

Callum

14th June
Mr Donald Jones,

I see that you have finally managed to carry out the extraordinarily difficult task of putting the certificate in a scanner and sending to Mr Kabila. Well done! Hip hip hooray! However don't get too excited just yet. All you have done is prove that YOU ARE TOTALLY INEPT!! Perhaps your name is actually Donald Duck?

Can I drive him quackers?

How difficult can it be to SPELL MY NAME CORRECTLY? It is Callum Moriarty McReid, NOT Callum Moriaty Mc Ried. Do you require me to send to some glasses so that you can see properly? It has taken me one whole month to get to you carry out this most simple of tasks, it required me to contact my lawyer, and you still GOT IT WRONG! For goodness sakes, get with it!

Without my correct name the certificate is ENTIRELY USELESS and I might as well wipe my arse with it! Send me a CORRECT certificate IMMEDIATELY!!!

And once you have done that, put in contact with someone else at Global Security And Finance who actually knows what they are doing and WHO IS NOT A COMPLETE FOOL OR IDIOT like yourself. I now have absolutely NO TRUST OR FAITH IN YOU for which you can only blame yourself. I will certainly not be arranging to fly half way around the world if I have to deal with a man who can not be relied on to even get the SIMPLEST of matters right!!!

No regards,

Callum

14th June
Dear callum,

Please confrim the deposit certificate I sent you and your schedule. Please also confrim to Mr.Jones when you are coming for the clearance in Athens.
I am standing by

Michael

15th June
Michael,

Did you not get my last email? The certificate is incorrect and I will not be able to prove my identity as he has it recorded. Mr Jones is clearly incompetent, are you absolutely sure there is no one we can deal with? There is no way that you will get me to fly half way around the world based on our dealings with Mr Jones thus far. If he can't even spell my name correctly what guarantee do I have that he can handle something as complicated as the release of the consignment? I'll tell you how much confidence I have that he can do this - none, nothing, zip, zilch, zero, nada. I do not trust the man or his abilities at all.

Callum

The folowing was a genuine ASEM, which may have hastened the demise of my first bait Sad

15th June
John,

Good to hear from you again and thank you for providing the information. I will review this with regard to the expected amount of additional demurrage which we will have to pay and inform you of my decision shortly. It is a little more than I would expect from my dealings in the Pacific region, but I guess US$20 per day isn't unreasonable given the value of the items under consideration. I don't foresee any difficulty but I need to make sure that I have some funds accessible.

I have good friends who are returning to South Africa in 3 weeks time and they have asked me to join them for several weeks holiday. I have never been to Africa before and am looking forward to the opportunity. I am a keen photographer and have always to go on safari. Perhaps I can combine business with pleasure and take a few days to complete our transaction. It seems like everything should be in place by then.

Give my regards to your mother and take care now.

Callum

16th June
Michael,

What is happening? I have not heard from you or Mr Jones since the certificate was sent. This is most strange. Is the deal still on?

Callum

One last carrot before the donkey before I consider this one complete and shut the email accounts down.

17th June
Michael,

I still have not heard from you. I will be traveling to Cape Town and Durban in approximately three weeks time with some friends. Please urgently let me know if you still wish to do business together so that I can can arrange my return tickets via Europe if required. I will be making my booking on Monday.

Callum

PS. I haven't heard from Mr Jones either. Has he spoken to you about the changes to the certificate yet?

Darn, it appears to have died...

21st June
Goodbye MUGU. It was fun playing.

First Bait "The art of subtle(?) slapping'"	View next topic View previous topic