The making of a TWAT (Dec. 1 - NEW VIDEO - p.10)

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Posted: Fri Oct 13, 2006 3:42 pm

You mean like this? Laughing

Posted: Fri Oct 13, 2006 3:54 pm

This is gonna be GREAT!

419Eater is my life Joined: 25 Aug 2006 Posts: 403

Big Worm wrote:

You are evil Roy...I love that idea! Yes the Brown Eye will be lit up. And I am surprised no one has commented on the name "Brown Eye"

Sounds like more METHANE TESTING AT THE PINNACLE OF THE PYRAMID!!!!

Baiting Guru Joined: 07 Jul 2006 Posts: 5727

Not a lot of people know this, but the original pyramids in egypt were built due to the activities of baiters.

Back in 2152 A.D. Egypt was having severe financial problems. Recent occurances of droughts and locust swarms had drained the sheckels from the treasury, and Pharoah Pepi II was desparate.

So Pharoah Pepi II grabbed his Royal ateliars and had them hammer out a mass stone mailing. These stone tablets notified the recepient that he was the winner of the Heracleapolis Lottery. All the receiver had to do was to wire 15,000 sheckels to the nearest Western Union to collect his prize.

Mentohotep II of the Kingdom of Thebes received the tablet, and he was not fooled. While many other leaders tossed their tablets into the local rock quary, Mentohotep II had a more evil idea.

Mentohotep II grabbed a few slaves, and crafted a response to Pharoah Pepi II telling him that Mentohotep had plenty of sheckels, and was willing to share them with Pharoah Pepi II. But first Pepi II had to join Mentohotep II's church, the "Royal Order of Stacking Crap on Top of Things", or "ROSCTT" for short. This gave Mentohotep II much joy, as ROSCTT , in ancient egyptian, basically meant "dumbshit."

Pharoah Pepi II took the bait hook, line and sinker, and proceeded to stack crap on top of each other. In an effort to get the most sheckels Pepi II decided to build the biggest and best crap stacking structure available.

Well, you can imagine the glee that Mentohotep had with this. He would look forward to the daily delivery of stone carvings detailing Pepi's progression.

When the crap stacking was done, the money, naturally, did not come. Mentohotep told Pepi II that he used a new method of sheckel transfer called "Western Union Secure Transfer" in which, immediately after the sheckels are collected, the slave working behind the counter is thrown into a pit. Sadly for Pepi, this service was nothing but a sham. Pepi spent the rest of his life going from Kingdom to Kingdom to Western Union offices. Pepi died a broken man. But we got the pyramids, so it's all good.

Posted: Fri Oct 13, 2006 5:07 pm

^^^^^

Posted: Fri Oct 13, 2006 7:38 pm

Jayhawk wrote:

Not a lot of people know this, but the original pyramids in egypt were built due to the activities of baiters.

Back in 2152 A.D. Egypt was having severe financial problems. Recent occurances of droughts and locust swarms had drained the sheckels from the treasury, and Pharoah Pepi II was desparate.

*COUGH* Pharaoh

*COUGH COUGH* Pepi II 2284 BC - c. 2184 BC

Anal retentive mode off Laughing

Baiting Guru Joined: 07 Jul 2006 Posts: 5727

^^^^ You mean that you read my entire post, and those were the only errors you could find?

Damn. I'm a better bullsh*tter than I thought.

Posted: Fri Oct 13, 2006 8:49 pm

Er, no, I didn't say that! I'm trying to get over my compulsion to make people get their historical facts right! So I'm sitting here rocking backwards and forwards repeating 'he was only joking, he was only joking'.... Wink

Posted: Sat Oct 14, 2006 3:00 am

Awsome site ! This will add a lot of fun when I am reformed saved very soon and follow TWAT for all eternity and give all my savings except for a measly 2 million or so to the church. What really astounds me is the shear fact that you were able to build it for the remarkably low cost of 800 million dollars, I mean WTF... you cant build anything anymore for 800 million. This is obviously a work of God, saving man kind and letting them enter TWAT one at a time. Cool

Not quite a Newb Joined: 21 Feb 2006 Posts: 63

The dimensions are awesome.. I can just see some lad thinking "only four by four by three metres.. until they start building it..

Hello I'm New here! Joined: 02 Jul 2006 Posts: 1

I absolutely love the brown eye. Laughed a lot when I saw that.

How about making them build a dozen monuments to celebrate 1600 AT (Anno Twatini), one for every year remaining until 2019? Smile

May god bless your church and it's team's endeavors!

Master Baiter Joined: 01 Oct 2006 Posts: 237

Frozboz wrote:

This is gonna be GREAT!

And as soon as the lads hesistate when they get partway through the building process, they only need to hear if they do it big, and well, and make it very sturdy, they'll get even more donations...when the media get wind of this massive pyramid springing up somewhere in ____ (wherever this group of lads you're going to be using this on is!).

You could probably get them actually to really do it (and well...exerting lots of energy...and time and money...to keep them from scamming others for quite awhile) but they'd probably get arrested as soon as they build something somewhere illegally or if they did foolishly try to get 'news' attracted to their project and it's realized that they're not legitimately doing something, but instead 419ers. Very Happy

I'm finally posting...and hopefully will start baiting (safely) soon...but have been enjoying reading posts for weeks.

But I REALLY can't wait to read THIS bait! You guys come up with incredible ideas!

Posted: Mon Oct 16, 2006 1:12 am

A burning Brown Eye! Laughing

On the morning before the burn have them eat many hot peppers to cleanse the blood. Then there will be many burning brown eyes! Twisted Evil

Can't wait for this one!

Posted: Mon Oct 16, 2006 1:29 am

I'd lose the picture of Benny Hinn. He is very well known in Nigeria.

Seriously.

http://www.google.com/trends

Search "benny hinn" and then click on regions. I recommend replacing him with Paul & Jan Crouch.

Posted: Mon Oct 16, 2006 2:41 am

Thanks Homer. Not a bad idea. We'll make the change now before any lads see it.

Posted: Tue Oct 17, 2006 9:06 pm

You guys better hurry! The deadline is approaching Wink

http://news.yahoo.com/s/nm/20061017/od_nm/britain_stonehenge_dc

Posted: Tue Oct 17, 2006 9:15 pm

found this monument in an article and thought of you guys. its an impressive monument to your faith.

Master Baiter Joined: 13 Jul 2005 Posts: 186 Location: GA

Lemme guess...in six months some lad is going to be sent by McLure to recover the money he placed in the middle of the pile of sandbags.

I am the Lad. As I build the monument, so shall my brother tear it down.

Posted: Thu Oct 26, 2006 8:57 pm

YW - Any bites on the pyramid scheme? (pun intended!!)

Bruin

Posted: Fri Oct 27, 2006 1:21 am

Yes. Actually we have a few that are in the process of joining the church. With something like this though, building enough trust to pull this off takes a little time. I suspect that we will have a pyramid though in a few weeks. There is one guy in particular that BW was baiting as a different church that went bankrupt and was purchased by TWAT. Some of the quotes from the emails are pretty funny.

Quote:

We sincerely embrace this great opportunity you and the TWAT have given to us.

I love it when TWAT gives me an opportunity to join it.

Posted: Thu Nov 02, 2006 2:03 am

Posted: Thu Nov 02, 2006 2:17 am

LOL. Once again the bar has been raised. Excellent bait!! Cant wait to see the results of this one.

Posted: Thu Nov 02, 2006 3:10 am

The shirt and tie on page 3 should be burned as a sacrifice to the Gods of taste.

Posted: Thu Nov 02, 2006 2:11 pm

This lad is from my old church bait (see mugu pyramid, pathetic attempt to lift car, etc. etc.) who was originally a lad from Darrrius's Purple Church. Laughing

He is our best candidate so far but we have also received another application. Wait until you guys read about the pyramid ceremony...not to be confused with the actual building of the pyramid Very Happy

Posted: Mon Nov 06, 2006 2:38 am

Big Worm's lad came through. What a trooper. It's a shame that he screwed up the dimensions so badly. It was supposed to be MUCH wider than this. But hey, I'm not complaining. 15 hours of back breaking work is better than 15 hours of sitting on a computer somewhere trying to steal from people. Plus, I am sure that his second attempt will be much better.

Quote:

DEAREST REVEREND BEN,
WARMEST GREETINGS TO YOU AND TO EVERY ONE IN THIS GREAT CHURCH. SORRY FOR THE DELAY. I WAS TRYING TO GET THE MATERIALS FOR THE TASK. THE MAIN WORK TOOK I AND MY FAMILY 15 HOURS. ANYWAY, BELOW IS THE PHOTO OF THE TASK. I LOOK FORARD TO HEAR FROM YOU SOON.
GOD BLESS,
OMORUYI

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