Lad reality; living in the mugu-verse

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Posted: Sun Oct 01, 2006 7:43 pm

Important business emails are written IN CAPITALS.

Tattoos cost over $1,000.

Professor Soludo does not like to go to the Western Union in person, he sends a lackey, who may well be in a different country.

My $24,000,000 (TWENTYFOUR MILLION USA DOLLARS) will be transferred next week.

The National Lottery always pays out from their agent in Spain.

Clifford Mugeri is not a real lad, and should get a fucking life.

Trophy Videos · Posted: Sun Oct 01, 2006 8:35 pm

The doctor tells them they are going to die in four months.
All their relatives are "ungodly," so they must find a good Christian to give money to.

419Eater is my life Joined: 21 Aug 2005 Posts: 381

You need a pennis or cork to fulk a pusy.

Not quite a Newb Joined: 01 Sep 2006 Posts: 30

Always end your emails with "Best Regards"

Posted: Mon Oct 02, 2006 9:03 am

MarkMark64 wrote:

Nigeria has sooo much unclaimed cash in their government accounts, one wonders why they are so broke?

Actually this should rather be:

Nigeria has sooo much unclaimed cash in their government accounts, no wonder they are so broke! Laughing

Posted: Mon Oct 02, 2006 9:47 am

Even though you're only 21 & a single male, your husband (married for 20yrs) died after hiding $20 million in a bank acount that you need a foreigner to move for you as you are now dying of ovarian cancer.

Posted: Mon Oct 02, 2006 5:56 pm

All women who are starving in refugee camps still have a computer with internet access and glamor modeling pictures of themselves.

Posted: Mon Oct 02, 2006 6:28 pm

Being dead doesn't stop you emailing your friend in America with instructions for the transfer of the money.

Hello I'm New here! Joined: 20 Jul 2004 Posts: 7

This image is the sole proof that the money exists.

Posted: Mon Oct 02, 2006 9:03 pm

Cancers, especially esophaegal, always defile medical treatment, and are often accompanied by something called "stroke sickness" which is more severe (especially in women).

Merchants in Dubai are a high-risk group for said cancers.

Medical doctors, wherever they are, demand money up front for life-saving medical procedures.

Posted: Mon Oct 02, 2006 11:57 pm

- Money only has value when written longhand - $74,000 is worthless, but $74,000 (SEVENTYFOUR THOUSAND DOLLARS) is worth a trip to the WU office.

- Hiring a goat costs $2200 (TWO THOUSAND TWO HUNDRED DOLLARS).

following on...

- Dollars are the only viable currency regardless of what country you are in.

Posted: Tue Oct 03, 2006 12:21 am

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! is considered proper punctuation in Nigerian banks and law offices.

Wannabe Baiter Joined: 14 Aug 2006 Posts: 88

While working with the Nigerian-based barrister working for a British national, you will probably have to deal with a bank in Hong Kong which will of course require you to make payments to a Brazilian agent who will then require you to fly to the Netherlands to collect some funds located in a security company in Saudi Arabia.

Posted: Tue Oct 03, 2006 2:57 am

There is no reason an educated Barrister has to be able to spell, use punctuation, or syntax correctly. They are also required to insult, swear at, and threaten the lives of their clients.

Posted: Tue Oct 03, 2006 3:57 am

A typical day on the Sagbama Express Road makes the Daytona 500 seem like a walk in the park.

Posted: Tue Oct 03, 2006 1:41 pm

Death Certificates, Deposit Certificates, and the like, are usually signed with a felt-tip pen.

It's customary for death certificates to feature a photograph of the victim.

Posted: Tue Oct 03, 2006 3:00 pm

YeaWhatever wrote:

- Everyone has the title of "Dr." no matter the situation.

Addendum: Except for the small but growing group who have the title of "Engineer" and insist on putting "Engr." in front of their names.

Related truth: Every other bank, diplomatic courier, and security company seems to have an "Engr."on staff for no apparent reason. Perhaps "Engr." is just this season's "Dr."Only time will tell if this fad has staying power.

Posted: Tue Oct 03, 2006 3:03 pm

Why are so many of the lads called Barr. Is that short for Barrimore?

Posted: Tue Oct 03, 2006 3:05 pm

This is no shit. One of my very first lads was "Senator Dr. Chief Jubril Musa". He hit a trifecta.

Posted: Tue Oct 03, 2006 3:15 pm

I have learned that Nigerian doctorates stress the importance of writing with the caps lock on and using no less than 5 exclamation points to end any given sentence.

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