Lad safari to Ghana, update - YOU'RE NICKED!

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Posted: Tue Jun 20, 2006 1:23 pm

/\/\/\ Worse than that, Brother Roy didn't see the drunk on a Suzuki bearing down on him!

Quote:

Dear Mr Kinsley,

I am a Ward Sister at the Regional Hospital, Wa, Ghana.
At 1.20am this morning, a Brother Royston Cropper was admitted to this
hospital. He appears to have suffered a cranial annurism, after being
run down by a motorbike, during the wild celebrations in Wa after
Ghana's victory over the Czech Republic in the World Cup, which made our
local papers, see
http://www.ghanaweb.com/GhanaHomePage/NewsArchive/artikel.php?ID=106069

He is being kept unconcious for the time being, until the swelling on
his brain reduces, as the pressure is putting his life in danger. Before
we sedated him, he had patches where he was quite lucid, he gave me a
printout of an email from you, and pleaded with me to send you an email
as a matter of urgency to tell you what has happened to him. He gave me
the impression that you are connected with his Church.

I have no idea what his message means, but he says to 'collect the money
in Accra, then for God's sake go to the Wechiau Orphange to save the
money in the safe before it is stolen'. Would it help if I ask the
Police to intervene?

We have a strike here at the Hospital, which you can also read about:
http://www.ghanaweb.com/GhanaHomePage/NewsArchive/artikel.php?ID=105702
There are hardly any staff left at the Hospital, which is why I am
emailing you from home after my shift. I do fear for Brother Royston, as
he is not getting the attention which he needs.

I hope he can cling to life, but if not at least I am carrying out his
dying wish.

Remain Blessed,

Sister Vera Duckw0rth

I dont suppose he'll be out of hospital in time to do anything about the WU Secure transfer before it expires in 6 days, so Kinsley can only pick it up himself. Matey in Ghana is not going to be best pleased, if he beleives Kinsley at all.
Twisted Evil

Posted: Tue Jun 20, 2006 1:54 pm

Brilliant thinking! Those damn motorbikes. I hope that it wasn't a Harley.

Posted: Tue Jun 20, 2006 2:57 pm

Nah, it was only a little putt-putt thing, the weight of a Harley would've killed poor Brother Roy.

From the accompanying article (these are real, I didn't make them for the bait)

Quote:

They tooted the horns of their motorbikes with dexterity while riding, a feat which scared other road users from moving on the main streets and also brought a lot more on the streets to watch their riding skills.

Gosh, I wish I had the riding skills to toot my horn with dexterity while riding!
Mr. Green

Ghanaweb seems to be written in the same quaint 1960's style as the Nigerian Daily Sun.

Posted: Tue Jun 20, 2006 5:05 pm

Stupid Mugu reveals what a dim f*cktard he really is Rolling Eyes

He's desperate for Bro Roy to ring his new and impatient best friend, as he is really in the manure now.

Quote:

Sister Vera Duckw0rth,

First of all i am very very sorry over this news of brother Roys accident and I really wish that you can only understand me and this mail also but do to the fact that you dont know and as i feel that you cant understand what our commnication is all about

I have written to him more than three mails today and even gave him this number 020 xxxxxx to call a brother i sent to him there in ghana.He knows that i am not here in ghana but a brother i sent to him.

Only what i wish to know from you is either you give him this number to call the very person i sent to him that is presently in ghana now so that they two will meet or you just direct me on how to meet with him in the very hospital and where is the hospital.

I will be glad if brother Roy should call this number or yourself to direct the very brother on how to meet him in the hospital.

Thank you

Kinsley,

Despite him being so dumb, I can only give him a gentle slap as I am now a nurse (It doesn't stop our nurse though Very Happy

). Note that the number is the Ghana lad's, he must be getting very wound up by now. He seems to want to bring Bro Roy some grapes or something.

Quote:

Dear Mr Kinsley,

Thankyou for your email, if Brother Roy ever regains conciousness I will
pass on your message, but you do not seem to understand. HE WILL NOT BE
RINGING OR EMAILING ANYONE FOR A LONG TIME, AS HE IS NOT AWAKE, AND THE
DOCTORS WILL KEEP HIM LIKE THIS FOR SOME DAYS IF NEEDED.

Visitors are not allowed into intensive care, unless they are very close
relations. In any event, you will not be able to speak with someone who
is not awake.

I will happily pass on any message to Brother Roy IF he wakes up, but
other than that, I am a Nurse, and will not get involved in a patient's
affairs, or make phone calls on his behalf.

Remain Blessed,

Sister Vera Duckw0rth

Posted: Tue Jun 20, 2006 5:11 pm

I like how you are playing this out. Brilliant work. He seems to be a bit thick, not really understand what it means to be in the hospital. It amazes me how they cannot see anything but the dollar signs- it clouds their mind they cannot comprehend simple emails.

Posted: Tue Jun 20, 2006 5:29 pm

Quote:

Only what i wish to know from you is either you give him this number to call the very person i sent to him

Brilliant lad. What about the words, "He is being kept unconcious" didn't he understand???

Posted: Tue Jun 20, 2006 5:41 pm

You sure it wasn't one of Steve's taxis that did the running over? Razz

"" the mind boggles (and thrills lightly!)

It never ceases to amaze me how much utter tripe you can make a greedy mugu swallow.

Posted: Tue Jun 20, 2006 5:50 pm

If any of my lads ever watch 'Coronation Street' they too will have a cranial annurism as all the Characters' names come as a suprise to them! Laughing

Posted: Wed Jun 21, 2006 12:27 am

Roycropper wrote:

...... to toot my horn with dexterity while riding.

A bit late (as ever) but something you may want to note:
There are large numbers of motorcycle (scooters) 'taxis' in West Africa - a dead cheap way of getting around - and they 'attract' customers by tooting their horns as they go along the road. You want one, you stop, wait 0.1 second and you have a choice of 7 Laughing

Given that car taxis also toot their horns, AND they all toot horns at each other, all day long there is a cacophony of tooting horns
It's enough to drive a Westerner (i.e. me) to insanity.

And if you so much as look at them, or even dare to stop before crossing the road, you find yourself being run by half a dozen of the little buggers all expecting you to jump on the back!

Africans are used to the din and so ignore it, but horns here usually attract attention, so I was always looking around to locate the source and then jumping out of the way to avoid the over zealous bike rider thinking I wanted a lift Rolling Eyes

Getting knocked down by a motorbike is a common event acording to my connection in Togo Shocked

Cheers
A.

Posted: Wed Jun 21, 2006 3:08 pm

Sounds like my being run over modality is quite beleivable then, I had Googled 'Wa Ghana Hospital' to find the 'strike' story, when I found the motorbikes wildly celebrating story Idea

I instantly knew what had happened to poor Brother Roy.

I've decided to remain unconcious until the WU Secure Transfer has expired, in the hope that they'll come from Nigeria again to try and collect it, also they may ask Sister Vera after Bro Roy's health. So they don't start all the 'withdraw the fund' crap, I'm waiting until the payment has expired before contacts the lads to tell them the sad news of Brother Roy's sad demise. As he will have just taken over the Wechiau mission, he will know nothing about any previous deals (or why the WU Secure didn't pay out), but might offer them some cash if they turn up in person for it (only them, not some mate of theirs).

In the meantime, the 'very brother' is not going to be best pleased with my lads, or their explanations as to why he hasn't got paid yet... Laughing

Posted: Thu Jun 22, 2006 10:23 am

Oh Hallebleedinlujagobble!

I've not had such a hit of adrenaline and pleasure just opening my mailbox since 'Christ on a bike' Woo, go mugus!!!!
happy crowd

Quote:

DEAR BROTHER ROY,

MY FRIEND ALEX WAS DETAINED IN POLICE STATION, ACCRA GHANA,WHERE HE WENT TO PICK THE MONEY YOU SENT TO US,THE POLICEMEN THERE SAID THAT, THE LEGGER IS FAKE SO DEAR BROTHER ROY,YOUR PRESSENCE IS NEEDED THERE AT THE PRUDENTAIL BANK LIMITED MAKOLA,ACCRA,GHANA.

PLEASE RIGHT NOW,I AM IN THE HOPITAL,I HAD AM ACCIDENT THATS'S WHY I COULDN'T FOLLOW HIM TO GHANA.PLEASE COME AND HELP US

THANKS
BROTHER KINSLEY
ODUNZE

A shame I'm still unconcious in another 'hopital', you're on your own, mugu.

So thats a repeat safari Safari

, and an arrest

, should score well on the safariometer!

A shame only one got caught, but this way I get to hear about it. Alex seemed to be the Oga anyway, in a fortnight he's been a 'begger' and a jailbird. Don't drop the soap, dude!

Thanks to YW for the WU Secure, it worked a treat getting him back there. clapping

I wonder what happened to their 'very brother'.

Posted: Thu Jun 22, 2006 10:36 am

Location: Intensive care, Wa Hospital

Laughing

Posted: Thu Jun 22, 2006 11:35 am

Congrats

Lets hope someone forgets where they put the key when he is in the cell with Buba. Twisted Evil

Posted: Thu Jun 22, 2006 11:44 am

Brilliant work Roy, let's hope nobody contacts the Ghana Police complaining about a 419 scammer and pig rustler by that name and description, or he'll never get out. Smile

At http://www.ghanapolice.org/ there's a "submit a tip" link. Nobody could be that cruel, could they.

Posted: Thu Jun 22, 2006 12:08 pm

Brave! Bravo! We want more! We want more!

Posted: Thu Jun 22, 2006 12:32 pm

Cheers All Very Happy

@PDSmith, Father Phineas just tried to submit a tip to the Ghana plod, they want a user name and password! WTF?

If you have a password pm me, I have lots of evidence that Alex Zander has being trying to defraud a Church, photos even!

If anyone can ring this number:
LOCATION: Accra Central, opposite NIB Headquarters
ADDRESS: Box 7111 ,Accra - North
Telephone No. +233(021)66 2441, (021)66 2290, (021)66 3563
Fax: +233(021)66 4345

I'm sure plod would like to know about Brother Alex! As I seem to be a party to a dodgy wire transfer I want to 'grass' safe as well as baiting safe!

Posted: Thu Jun 22, 2006 1:09 pm

Damn, you're right. that sucks. Only registered users can report a crime, and there's no way to register Confused

Faxing the details via a free fax provider should do the trick.

Posted: Thu Jun 22, 2006 1:21 pm

I just found I cant send faxes with my free Lycos fax account. Can anyone advise me of a free fax provider that lets me compose and send a fax?

I need it PDQ, I dont want them letting the scumbag go now they've got him.

On the other hand, it might be best to do nothing:

I wouldn't think his explanations about a mysterious monk in a coma sending him money to come and get a tattoo are going down well with the Ghana Police. If noone comes forward to vouch for him (As if!), it looks like a pretty open and shut attempted wire fraud case.... Laughing

He even has a convincingly faked Western Union email, which will take some explaining!

I think on second thoughts I'll say nowt, as they say in Weatherfield, I don't want to help him by corroborating his story. Back to the coma then. Shocked

Any attempts by the Police to verify his story, say by trying to find Sister Vera Duckw0rth in Wa General Hospital, or Brother Roy in intensive care, will just make him look more stupid. Twisted Evil

The more he tries to explain with such obvious bullshit, the deeper the hole he will dig for himself! Laughing

Posted: Thu Jun 22, 2006 1:39 pm

I've been trying to phone them, to ask if they have an email addy, but I'm getting "invalid phone number" with skype. Mad

That's ALL those numbers.

[edit] just read all your post. Good thinking.

Posted: Thu Jun 22, 2006 1:47 pm

Thanks for trying, PD, but no worries, see my edit above, if we intervene we corroborate his wildly implausible story.

I know the Police don't go out of the way to catch scammers, but if they have a foreign national caught red-handed in a bank trying to scam $950 with a clearly fraudulent fake WU email, I don't think they'll just let him go.

I wonder what the penalties for that are like in Ghana?

They don't do lenient there:

Quote:

Goaso (B/A) June 15, GNA - A circuit court at Goaso in Asunafo North district of Brong Ahafo has sentenced Kwaku Asabere, a 55-year old farmer to six months imprisonment in hard labour for stealing a bunch of plantains

Quote:

Juaso-Ashanti, June 18, GNA - A Juaso Circuit court has sentenced an ex-convict to six years imprisonment in hard labour after escaping from jail two months after being convicted for stealing two rams.

hard labour eh, Brother Alex needed to lose some weight:

I wonder if he brought his pink underpants?

Posted: Thu Jun 22, 2006 2:04 pm

Never mind, I expect his cellmate likes his bitches plump. Laughing

He'll love those pink shorts, too.

Posted: Thu Jun 22, 2006 2:09 pm

Well done, that man
Good bit of baiting, what?

Damn good show all round
happy crowd

I had a slight brush with the Ghanaian police when I was there, they seemed a thoroughly miserable bunch indeed. They did not like foreigners at all, even those travelling legitimately.
Your lad will, I suspect, get more than a slap. Laughing

Perhaps you can find some way of keeping up-to-date with Alex' plight.
Another character to enquire via 'Brother Kinsley', maybe?
Not that I want to hear all the nasty things that happen to this Alex
No.

Not at all
Laughing

Cheers
A.

Posted: Thu Jun 22, 2006 3:09 pm

/\/\/\ Don't worry, as well as the fact Kinsley is emailing Bro Roy in the hope he will reply despite being in a coma, there's still Nurse Vera.

At the moment though I'm keeping my head down and staying in a coma Shocked

, I don't want to help him by substantiating his ridiculous story.

In time, will find an email address on Brother Roy's PC, and enquire as to what is going on. that way we can get an update, but of course Bro Franklin will be in no position to help anyone, he will be as bewildered as the Police must be. Very Happy

EDIT: I know this ain't the World Cup thread, but Ghana just beat the USA to go into the 2nd round of the World Cup. I guess the Police will have forgotten Alex, and he'll have to lie in his cell listening to beeping motorbikes all night! At least he can't get run over (though he might fall down the stairs a time or two)

Posted: Thu Jun 22, 2006 5:13 pm

PsycheDelia_Smith wrote:

Damn, you're right. that sucks. Only registered users can report a crime, and there's no way to register Confused

Faxing the details via a free fax provider should do the trick.

I'm in and can report a crime Smile

http://www.ghanapolice.org/submit_a_tip.htm

Try this.

Posted: Thu Jun 22, 2006 5:39 pm

/\/\/\ That's the page Father Phin3as filled in, but when you try and submit it, youre asked for your username and password. It's as if they dont want you to make work for them! Rolling Eyes

also I dont want to leave my IP anywhere, considering I'm a party to my mugu's crime (though I can use a proxy)

Anyway it doesn't matter now, Ive decided that it would only back up his madcap story of internet priests dishing out money. The more I leave it, the more it looks like he is a solo scammer trying to rob a bank.

Reading the Ghanaweb news, they've been having a lot of trouble with armed Nigerian bank robbers recently,
http://www.ghanaweb.com/GhanaHomePage/crime/artikel.php?ID=106233
so they'll be feeling very tolerant towards my lad.

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