| Author |
Message |
CapnChitlin
Guest
|
 Posted:
Wed Mar 17, 2004 10:22 am |
  |
This is my exstensive bait that was done a year ago i just now was able to complile all the emails which totaled around 100 or so . some parts may repeat due to cut and paste errors due to mail.com and my connection. but i hope you enjoy. From Dr. ANKRA MUGU
Tel: 00225 07 73 77 79
Dear Sir/Madam,
I am a Private Investor based here in Africa. A group of
Government Officials from Cote D'Ivoire An African Country
contacted me with a Proposal to safe a huge amount of money
to the tune of US$20 M. I am wish to Make contact with you
and state their offer,if your Interest is Genuine, you will
be Contacted to open an Account with the mother bank
offshore online banking system where the fund is right
now.I could have handled this my self but I have a deal
here that the government of this country is monitoring all
my modus oparandi.So if you are interested to handle this
issue you will give me the sum of 5% from your share as they
will give you 20% of the total sum as soon as you receive
this money in your online account. Note that once you
receive this fund you will deduct your share,forward the
remaining balance to any where the owners will want there
money Once it gets to your online nominated Bank account
in Commonwealth of dominica .
My good friend,I don't think I need to spell out the
importance of Secrecy in this Matter considering the
amount involved and the position of this officials here in
Africa.Please the confidentiality of this business is
highly needed. Let me state clearly here that the account
that you would be providing does not need to have funds in
it. It is only needed to be activated and be able to
receive the funds. So, if I don't hear from you within
three days I will assume you are not interested and will
solicit for a new partner, but if you know you are
interested let me know. List your phone & fax Numbers
so that I will communicate with you and furnish you with
all the necessary information and directives.
Waiting to hear from you.
Dr Ankra Mugu
ahoy there DR Mugu
sounds like an interesting proposal are you sure its completely
legal? as far as phone and fax line i dont have one right now i am
out at sea sailing in my trusty ship the SS. Govt Cheese. so i am
thinking it would be safer to use email for now. i wait to hear from
you.
Captain Charles (Charlie) Chitlin
Subject: From Dr Ankra: Act on this and get back to me
immediatelyDate: Thu, 10 Apr 2003 10:39:50 +0000Return-Path: <[email protected]>Received:
(qmail 26118 invoked from network); 10 Apr 2003 15:35:15
-0000Received: from unknown (HELO spf13.us4.outblaze.com)
(205.158.62.67) by 205-158-62-64.outblaze.com with SMTP; 10 Apr 2003
15:35:15 -0000Received: from authbackup4.us4.outblaze.com
(205-158-62-159.outblaze.com [205.158.62.159]) by
spf13.us4.outblaze.com (Postfix) with ESMTP id CAE222F8316 for <[email protected]>;
Thu, 10 Apr 2003 15:36:12 +0000 (GMT)Received: from
qmail1.zwallet.com (qmail1.zwallet.com [216.66.64.4]) by
authbackup4.us4.outblaze.com (8.12.9/8.12.7) with SMTP id
h3AFhfcq089970 for <[email protected]>;
Thu, 10 Apr 2003 15:43:53 GMTReceived: from web2.zwallet.com by
qmail1.zwallet.com with SMTP; 10 Apr 2003 15:35:01
-0000X-Originating-Ip: [213.136.101.172]Message-Id: <[email protected]>
Dear Ahoy Seadog Charles,
I acknowledge the receipt of your mail dated 7th April and have made
my prayer of acceptance to my God.Thanks for your intention to assist
us secure this my clients inheritance with the bank.
My client has suffered so much since his family died, but they had so
much money which they are still to lay their hands on. This money was
deposited in the vault account of an international bank here in
Abidjan Cote D'Ivoire.And they were informed that his foreign partner
will be coming for the collection.What we will do once i hear from
you is for you to Send down to me immediately your scan international
passport or driving lincence,so that i can intruct the Government
officals to order the Bank to correspond with you immediately for
onward transfer of the fund into you account, Which you have to open
with them in their online bank, as they are only paying through that,
since after the sanction by US Government and that of the ECOWAS
community, in conjuction with the present political war going on
here, all fund exceeding one million US dollars should be paid via
through their online system.Also the offical will like you to assist
them after final disbursment in your count
ry to invest their own share on a profitable investment field.This
officals have too much money but are still yet to laid their hands
on it, once i hear from you i will send across to you all the
depository documents for your perusal. thanks in all your endavours
to assist us secure this our inheritance.i await to hear from you for
us to proceed, send across your phone and fax numbers immediately you
bart from your Ahoy sailing voyage ship,for easier communication.
I look foward to your mail
Thanks
Best Regards
Dr Ankra Mugu
Ahoy there my good mate Mugu
im still not sure about this isnt it illegal? right now i am drifting
at sea i am only able to send and receive emails at this time with
the landsat. my navigation is down and i am drifting in a sea of
icebergs at the moment my crew is pretty scared. so how is your
family? good i hope. may the lord of the seas grant you gentle
breezes and clear skies.
your friend
Capn Chitlin
: Subject: From Dr Ankra: Ahoy brotherDate: Sat, 12 Apr 2003 06:49:54
-0400Return-Path: <[email protected]>Received:
(qmail 3648 invoked from network); 12 Apr 2003 10:59:52
-0000Received: from unknown (HELO spf13.us4.outblaze.com)
(205.158.62.67) by 205-158-62-62.outblaze.com with SMTP; 12 Apr 2003
10:59:52 -0000Received: from spf4.us4.outblaze.com
(205-158-62-26.outblaze.com [205.158.62.26]) by
spf13.us4.outblaze.com (Postfix) with ESMTP id 78A692F83B1 for <[email protected]>;
Sat, 12 Apr 2003 11:00:54 +0000 (GMT)Received: from
qmail1.zwallet.com (qmail1.zwallet.com [216.66.64.4]) by
spf4.us4.outblaze.com (8.12.9/8.12.7) with SMTP id h3CAxoqm034954 for
<[email protected]>;
Sat, 12 Apr 2003 10:59:51 GMTReceived: from web1.zwallet.com by
qmail1.zwallet.com with SMTP; 12 Apr 2003 10:59:41
-0000X-Originating-Ip: [213.136.101.195]Message-Id: <[email protected]>
Dear Ahoy Brother,
Thanks so much for your mail. Well i don't blame you for
your fears of the legallity of this transaction but by the time i
will send across to you all the depositary documents this weekend for
your perusal, and i strongly believe that what that i path of light
in the transaction will be seen a bit pending when your ship will
bart, for us to conculde this transaction in a sweet end deal.
Get sailing and the almight God will guard and protect until your
arrival.
Staying in the sea all your life makes your meditation more high and
powerful i know that, as i was once a sailor like you.
Ahoy!!!! seadog.
Thanks
Yours Faithfully
Dr Ankra Mugu
Subject: here are the depositary documents for your perusal, get back
to meDate: Tue, 15 Apr 2003 12:55:02 -0400Return-Path: <[email protected]>Received:
(qmail 8181 invoked from network); 15 Apr 2003 17:07:54
-0000Received: from unknown (HELO spf10.us4.outblaze.com)
(205.158.62.72) by 205-158-62-64.outblaze.com with SMTP; 15 Apr 2003
17:07:54 -0000Received: from qmail1.zwallet.com (qmail1.zwallet.com
[216.66.64.4]) by spf10.us4.outblaze.com (Postfix) with SMTP id
DD3CBEAFDB for <[email protected]>;
Tue, 15 Apr 2003 17:07:53 +0000 (GMT)Received: from web3.zwallet.com
by qmail1.zwallet.com with SMTP; 15 Apr 2003 16:52:16
-0000X-Originating-Ip: [213.136.101.59]Mime-Version: 1.0Content-Type:
multipart/mixed;
boundary="C324DFG7---ZMAIL--NEXT-PART--875218--324DGS4FK"Message-Id:
<mailto:[email protected]
Dearest Ahoy Brother,
Have you bart. see attachment as the depositary
documents.
Once i hear from you with the fax and phone number i will then
immediately inform the bank to make payment in your favour.
Thanks and God bless.
Ahoy Dr Mugu
>Subject: Re: here are the depositary documents for your perusal,
get back
> to me
>
>ahoy there my brother
>
>land ahoy we have found land and we have docked at a port it is
Bandung we are loading up with supplies and i have a fax number it is
13202134828 and did we have a bit of good luck we caught a shark
last night and 3 tuna and we are eating good tonight. >then last
night mate pepe had too much to drink again and thought he seen a
mermaid. that lil bugger he dropped his pants and grabbed a knife and
fork and jumped overboard we had to fish him out. it wasnt no mermaid
it was the USS Saratoga we almost ran >into it. those americans
can be cocky sometimes. have a great day my brother and may Neptune
grant you gentle seas.
>
>your brother
>Charlie Subject: inform me immediatelyDate: Tue, 15 Apr 2003
14:10:13 +0000Return-Path: <[email protected]>Received:
(qmail 18085 invoked from network); 15 Apr 2003 19:05:56
-0000Received: from unknown (HELO spf8.us4.outblaze.com)
(205.158.62.35) by 205-158-62-62.outblaze.com with SMTP; 15 Apr 2003
19:05:56 -0000Received: from qmail1.zwallet.com (qmail1.zwallet.com
[216.66.64.4]) by spf8.us4.outblaze.com (Postfix) with SMTP id
94D687C5BF for <[email protected]>;
Tue, 15 Apr 2003 19:05:45 +0000 (GMT)Received: from web2.zwallet.com
by qmail1.zwallet.com with SMTP; 15 Apr 2003 19:06:03
-0000X-Originating-Ip: [213.136.101.231]Message-Id: <[email protected]>
Dear Ahoy,
Thanks so much for your mail of today, more expecially making
me remember the good old university days of mine, as an ahoy seadog.
While into buisness, should i submit this fax information to the bank
to contact your from their as they will be noticfing you on transfer
payment schedule through it.
So i ask, is it save? will be be staying their for atleast two
working weeks, since the transfer will not take long.
Who do we disburt, as we intend meeting with you over in the USA for
final disburtment and upfront joint partnership in business.
Please inform me all for mre clearfications.
Thanks
Ahoy seadog
Mugu
Subject: inform me back
immediately!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!Date: Tue, 15 Apr 2003
16:22:25 +0000Return-Path: <[email protected]>Received:
(qmail 27583 invoked from network); 15 Apr 2003 21:18:05
-0000Received: from unknown (HELO spf4.us4.outblaze.com)
(205.158.62.26) by 205-158-62-62.outblaze.com with SMTP; 15 Apr 2003
21:18:05 -0000Received: from qmail1.zwallet.com (qmail1.zwallet.com
[216.66.64.4]) by spf4.us4.outblaze.com (Postfix) with SMTP id
7124B1B70D9 for <[email protected]>;
Tue, 15 Apr 2003 21:18:03 +0000 (GMT)Received: from web2.zwallet.com
by qmail1.zwallet.com with SMTP; 15 Apr 2003 21:18:14
-0000X-Originating-Ip: [213.136.101.231]Message-Id: <[email protected]>
Dear Brother,
Ok we can act on that, but please spell out the phone and fax
number correct, by listing first the country international direct
dial code, city code and phone and fax .
I await your soonest response to this before i proceed to the Bank
for order.
Thanks
Ahoy
Dr Mugu
ahoy there here is the complete fax and everything 62-22-305104 there
you go. gentle breezes to you my fellow seadog.
ps. what kind of gifts should i get you while im in bandung?
the capn
Subject: beaware of this stageDate: Wed, 16 Apr 2003 04:28:57
+0000Return-Path: <[email protected]>Received:
(qmail 23039 invoked from network); 16 Apr 2003 09:24:58
-0000Received: from unknown (HELO spf8.us4.outblaze.com)
(205.158.62.35) by 205-158-62-62.outblaze.com with SMTP; 16 Apr 2003
09:24:58 -0000Received: from qmail1.zwallet.com (qmail1.zwallet.com
[216.66.64.4]) by spf8.us4.outblaze.com (Postfix) with SMTP id
733FD7C597 for <[email protected]>;
Wed, 16 Apr 2003 09:24:55 +0000 (GMT)Received: from web2.zwallet.com
by qmail1.zwallet.com with SMTP; 16 Apr 2003 09:24:06
-0000X-Originating-Ip: [213.136.101.156]Message-Id: <[email protected]>
Dearest Ahoy Brother,
Thanks for your mail,well as you said all gift will be once
we conculde this buisness. Am on my way now sailing to the bank for
an approval of the fund payment in your favour.
Immediately am through i will let you know. Please call me via my
direct number 00225 07 73 77 79. immediately the BIAO Bank of Abidjan
Cote D'Ivoire gets you inform normally.
Please my clients insist that you will sign an Oath of Trust and
Acceptance for them, so when next i will be mailing you i will pick
up the oath from them and attach it for you, to sign and return to me
for their legal protection.
Make sure, you start sourcing good business we can invest this money
into, as i was been directed by my client to reveal to you of their
intention to have a life partnership with you in the nearest future,
since i have asure them of your confidentiality in this transaction
and in person.
Ahoy we have made it in the might name of the Almight God.
I will be leaving you for now, until evening.
Thanks and may God bless you and your fellow captain over there.
Best Regards
Ahoy Seadog
Dr Mugu
Dear Brother,
Thanks alot for the information now by tommorow morning i
will sail into action with the bank.
Please brife me what and what is found on bandung? before a make my
choice of gift, you will bring for me.
I await your soonest response to this immediately.
Thanks fellow seadog.
Listen the melody:
Everybody is a pirate smoking rum and drinking wiskey, one leg up
and down, dancing like a pirate ahoy! ahoy!! ahoy!!!.
ahoy there matey
that is a wonderful sea shanty. we have found lots of great things
here we have picked up some mens and womens watches and we found some
oysters and dove for them and found some black pearls. i will give
you some of my Capn's Chitlin's breaded homestyle fishsticks i have
peppered carp and barbaque shad. ever tried them? they are pretty
famous. maybe after this business is done we can go in together
selling them i would only go in this business with you a fellow
seadog like myself. i have picked up a lot of other things passing
through singapore and hong kong. we had to leave there pretty quickly
due to SARS. i have dvds from there various things. and i have a
billy the singing bigmouth bass for you. we have lots of things my
crew has sailed the seven seas and it is about time we lighten our
cargo. i remember the time there was a big storm and we washed up on
this desert island full of termites i mean they were every where and
the bloody things ate me peg leg. luckily they didnt get near the
govt cheese ole pepe he opened up a keg of peanut butter we had and
it attracted them all and all the other bugs on the island then we
spent 3 days patching up the ship. we are getting ready to go diving
for some sunken treasure we heard about. we will have to sit around
one day and swap stories of the sea. smooth sailing my brother
Charile
ahoy there
unfortunately there is an embargo on foreign calls here in bandung so
im not able to call out. and i am getting ready to ship out to burma
to check on a property i have it seems we may have found a rather
large ruby mine on it. but the good news is i will have my personal
aide who is my book keeper and attorney James Torgerson III help out
with this venture he is my personal aide and can be totally trusted
he is in charge of my estate while i am abroad you can contact him at
[email protected]
oh yeah and guess what? i got you another gift got you an orangutan
his name is clyde. i will still be in communication with you in this
business. but before ye know it lad we will be kicking back a barrel
of rum together.
your brother charlie
Dear Ahoy Brother,
Thanks for your urgent information.
Knowing fully well the nature of this transaction, i see it proper
for you to contact your said Attorney James Torgerson III, so that he
can he can get me contacted immediately, with the following
informations, so that the bank will now been contacting him rather
than you, and then i will be feeding with the progress informations
likewise your attorney.
Below are the informations i need from him, so as to submit it to the
Bank for immediate payment.
1 Telephone Number
2Fax Number
3Recievers Name
4Resident or company address
Once all this are been brought forward by him we can then proceed.
Meanwhile i will scan and send him the oath to sign on your behalf,
once i hear from him.
You can send me the watch gift item via DHL before you sail off via
my Secetarys name, since he is the person that nomarlly help out
here.
Name: Emeka Oke Nmaju
03 BP 3316 ABJ 03
Williamsville
Abidjan Cote D'Ivoire
Tel: 22507737779
Indicate to them to call me for pick up on arrival, as i await to
welcome it soonest.
I will be waiting for your attorneys mail immediately, as i have to
be in the bank by tommorow or so.
Thanks so much as i await you soonest.
Best Regards
Dr Ankra Mugu
Dear Ahoy,
I have had you.Once i hear from him today tommorow as you said
then i can then relate to you.
For now what next, am i recieing the watch via DHL as we said.
I await you soonest, as aming paking full sea songs and peom that
will keep you alive until your sailing is over.
Thanks
Ahoy Dr Mugu Good Morning, Mr. Magoo.My client Captain Chitlin has
relayed a message to me that I should contact you regarding business
dealings he is about to embark upon with you. As you likely know,
while the Captain sails the high seas, I act as his Power of
Attorney, managing all his day to day affairs and finances.If you
would be so kind as to provide me details regarding any business
arrangements you have with the Captain, I will be most happy to
provide whatever assistance is necessary.Below you will find my phone
and fax numbers, as well as my address. Feel free to contact me at
anytime. However, be advised that the phone and fax are used by all
the attorneys of my firm, and the phone calls are tape recorded for
security purposes. Should you wish to remain strictly confidential, I
would suggest you contact me only via this email
address.Additionally, due to the US Code of Federal Regulations,
20CFR404.1576, also known as "The Patriot Act", in order
for you to conduct business in the United States as a foreign entity,
you must first open a US bank account. Attached you will find an
application which you must complete, sign and date. The minimum
amount required to open the account is $20.00 USD or it's equivalent
in foreign money. Please return the completed form and the $20.00 to
me at your earliest convenience. Should you require any assistance
completing the form, please so advise, and I will assist you.I remain
Sincerely Yours in Law,His Esquireship James E. Torgerson, III
Attorney At Law
Heller, Ehrman, White & McAuliffe
510 L Street
Suite 500
Anchorage, AK
99501-1959
MAIN: (907) 277-1900
FAX: (907) 277-1920
Website: http://www.hewm.com/
Email: [email protected]
or [email protected]
************** IMPORTANT MESSAGE **************
This e-mail message is intended only for the
addressee(s) and contains information which may
be confidential. If you are not the intended
recipient please advise the sender by return
email, do not use or disclose the contents, and
delete the message and any attachments from your
system. Unless specifically indicated, this email
does not constitute formal legal advice or
commitment by the sender.
************************************************** Ahoy
Captain!Just a quick note to bring you up to speed on a couple of
issues:As per your message, I have contacted Mr. Magoo and informed
him to provide me with details regarding the proposed business
dealings you wish to enter into with him. I have also provided him
with a copy of an Application to open a bank account, as per Federal
Law.On a second note, I am pleased to inform you that your purchase
of the unexplored land in the Yukon region has been finalized. As per
your instructions, I have hired members of the Survey Company, Lewis
and Clark, Inc. to travel to your new land to conduct a thorough
investigation of its potential development. They departed by
helicopter yesterday afternoon, and will provide me with a
preliminary report late today, or early tomorrow. I will notify you
immediately upon receipt of their findings. P.S. In keeping with your
previous instructions, the land was titled in the name "Dr.
Forskin Smegma" and all dealings have been kept in the strictest
of confidence in order to avoid burdensome taxation.Yours in Law,His
Esquireship James E. Torgerson, IIIAttorney At LawHeller, Ehrman,
White & McAuliffe 510 L Street Suite 500 Anchorage, AK 99501-1959
MAIN: (907) 277-1900FAX: (907) 277-1920Website: http://www.hewm.com/Email: [email protected]
or [email protected]
Please be advised that due to urgent business in the Yukon Region,
I will be unavailable until Monday 04-21-03. If there is an
emergency you may call my number and ask for a different member of
the firm to assist you.Yours in Law, His Esquireship James E.
Torgerson, III
Attorney At Law
Heller, Ehrman, White & McAuliffe
510 L Street
Suite 500
Anchorage, AK
99501-1959
MAIN: (907) 277-1900
FAX: (907) 277-1920
Website: http://www.hewm.com/
Email: [email protected]
or [email protected]
Dear James,
Am Dr Ankra Mugu, not that you spell.I got you alright.Am out
until monday too.
I will reach you once am back too.
Thanks
Dr Ankra Mugu
Dearest Ahoy,
I have recieve contact from Mr James. Here is my mail to
him.
Thanks
Dr Ankra Mugu ahoy there brother mugu
i thought i would just write you while you are away till monday. ive
been going around collecting gifts for you. you should get them soon.
i picked up a geisha for you today. because you will need someone to
help cook and clean up after clyde when he arrives there with the
watch for you. she can cook really good too. you like chinese food?
she can make a really good cream of sum yun guy im sure you must have
tried that before im sure you will like it. and brother let me tell
you what happened yesterday. here we were on the SS Govt Cheese and
were heading to port moresby and all the sudden we got attacked by
leviathian but luckly i borrowed pepe's pellet gun and took him out
and im going to have him mounted and thats what we are having for
dinner tonight is leviathian. and when i was taking a nap stupid pepe
almost ran right into "Ye olde rusty barnacle" which is a
seafood resturant on a ship. were they ever mad at us i mean they
threw clams and lobsters and fried shrimp at us. since we are doing
business together i think we should get to know each other a little
more. first ill start off my name is Captain Charles Au'Gratin
Chitlin Captain of the SS Government Cheese. ive been sailing the
seas for over 35 years and ive lived the sailors life to the fullest.
i hope that you will have a great weekend.
your brother
Charlie (the capn)
My apologies for the mispelling of your name. I meant no
disrespect.Additionally, in my hurry, I forgot to attach the Bank
Account Application. Please find it attached to this email. Simply
complete the application, sign it, have it scanned and email it back
to me. You will also need to mail me $20.00 USD or it's equivalent in
order to have the account activated. Please attend to this at your
earliest convenience.Yours in Law, His Esquireship James E.
Torgerson, IIIAttorney At Law Dear Dr. Mugu:I received an error
message which indicated the Bank Account Application attachment in my
last email to you was destroyed in transit due to a fatal flaw in the
OS of my ISP. That problem has now been resolved, and I will attach
the Application to this email. Please respond to advise me of its
receipt.Yours in Law,His Esquireship James E. Torgerson, IIIAttorney
At Law
Dear Captain:I have execellent news for you, Captain. I have
returned from a meeting with the Surveyors I sent to survey your
recently purchased land in the Yukon Territories.They have advised me
that your land is pocketed with hundreds of caves, and while this
makes it unsuitable in many respects for the construction of the
"Pissed Parrot Pub and Watersports Complex" you envisioned,
the Surveyors have discovered emeralds in many of the caves! I have
attached photos of some of the emeralds they were able to mine by
hand for your review.Based on their Survey Report as well as the
Assay Report regarding the quality of the emeralds, I am pleased to
announce that you, sir, have become extremely wealthy!! According to
the reports, you may expect at minimum to be able to mine well over
$100 million dollars worth of emeralds before depleting the mines.Of
course, this is predicated on your ability to raise the start-up
capital required for any large scale mining operation. I have
reliable estimates that you will need approximately $2-3 million in
cash to begin mining. You may wish to consider a loan, and I am in a
position to assist you in this regard, should that be your wish.
Please advise as soon as possible as to your desire to move forward
on this matter.Naturally, I have kept this matter top secret and will
take steps to ensure the word of your great fortune does not get out.
Additionally, I have taken the liberty to post guards at the caves in
order to keep the pesky Inuits out of them. I trust you agree with
this decision.In closing, allow me to be the first to congratulate
you, Captain!!! After 35 years of wandering the high seas in search
of your fortune, it appears your fortune has found you! Yours in Law,
His Esquireship James E. Torgerson, IIIAttorney At Law Dear Ahoy
brother,
We have run into good lucjy as the seadog lord may
happen it as you have been in problem of $2 to $3 million dollars to
run up your project as i learnt from your Lawyer.
Please advice your Lawyer to mail and intimate me on his perfect home
address that he can recieve the money in consignment in a metalic box
as we didn't know that my client fathers deposited the fund in a
trunk box as family valueables to the bank vault department. So we
are luckly. Please aware that your lawyer have to pay for the cost of
the transporting to USA, once the Diplomatic arrive into his country.
I await you soonest response towards this immediately.
Thanks
Best Regards
Dr Ankra
ahoy there matey
that is excellent news. my crew and i have been celebrating ever
since we got your letter. poor pepe celebrated a little too much. him
and clyde got into it. and they got us thrown out of the all you can
eat seafood buffet. pepe ate all the food. my crew sure can put away
the crablegs i tell you that much. then pepe tried to eat out of the
fish tank thats when we got thrown out. dont know where we are
currently pepe threw up on the nav controls. but luckily my chief
technician Mr. Frank Dildo is working on it now. so do you have a pic
of yourself here is one of me so you can better know who i am and for
when we do meet so you will know who i am. send me a pic when you
can. thanks for the great news my brother and may lady luck smile yer
way.
sincerely
your brother
the capn
Dear Captain and Dr. Mugu:I am confused. Let me begin by saying I
in no way have advised Dr. Mugu of any "Project" which
would require $2-3 million dollars. (See email below) I wish to be on
record that I decline comment upon said project, and can neither
confirm nor deny the existence of said project.Secondly, I have no
idea what Dr. Mugu is talking about when he refers to a
"consignment" that he seems to believe I wish to purchase.
Can one or both of you explain to me exactly what this
"consignment" is, and why I would wish to purchase such a
thing?!I sent Dr. Mugu an Application to open a bank account but he
has not returned it to me. As I previously explained, in order for a
foreign national to do business in the US, they are required by
Federal Law to establish a bona-fide US bank account. Dr. Mugu must
complete the application and forward $20.00 U.S.D. (2,200 C.A.P.) in
order to open the aforementioned account before any business can
evolve between the two of you. Captain, I request you impress upon
Dr. Mugu the necessity of completing this step before we can move
forward.Dr. Mugu: As per your request, please find my address
below.P.S. Dr. Mugu: What exactly is "good lucjy" and how
did you run into it?? I do hope you were not hurt when you ran into
it! I remain Yours in Law,His Esquireship James E. Torgerson,
IIIAttorney At Law
Ahoy there
Mr. Torgerson allow me to explain in better detail i am involved in a
joint venture with Dr Mugu which i entrust with you which needs to be
treated in a matter of the upmost secrecy. it is so secret dont even
let anyone at your office know of its existance. i will let Dr. Mugu
better explain the details. this transaction should be treated as you
say in legal terms as pro cunnilingis.
Dr Mugu. Mr. Torgerson is right it is federal law under the Howard
Stern act made by president George Clinton so it is important to get
that fee to him. anyways my brother i have a personal request from
the bottom of my heart. i now consider you to be my long lost
brother. ever since i lost my real brother in a petting zoo mishap
when i was a child i have felt at a loss for all that time and i have
no family left now but you have filled in that empty spot and you are
like my long lost brother. so i am asking very very humbily if at all
possible could you have a picture taken of yourself holding a sign
that says "Ahoy Capn Chitlin" it would mean a lot to this
old seadog. but hey guess what brother great news i got you a new
gift i got you an alligator  and it dont eat too much. i have to go
for now but ill write later.
the capn
P.S hey James can you send an attorney down here to borneo for pepe
he got arrested at another brothel last night.
P.S.S. hey brother are you a medical doctor by any chance pepe needs
someone to look at this rash i think he got it in bandung from that
brothel he got thrown out of.
Content-Type: text/plain; charset=us-ascii
Content-Transfer-Encoding: 7bit
Dear Ahoy and James,
I got your mail and have to put you through in what am
saying. What i mean was that we ran into "good luck"
(typing error)
The money was deposited as cash into the bank by Late Gen Guei.
So we have arrange with the Bank to embark on lifting the fund into
USA via Diplomatic means.
So you are to recieve the sum of $20,000,000.00 United State Dollars
in a metalic consignment at your underlisted address door step.
So immediately i recieve a go ahead order from Capitin, i will order
the bank to reach you on the airway bill.
Beaware that whatever form of account or agreement will be between
you and my Client, The Late Gen. Son, once you recieve the fund and
he comes over to USA as he will want to do everything face to face
with you.
But if you cn not recieve the fund at your doorstep, then you will be
required to come down to Abidjan Cote D'Ivoire for the pulling out of
the fund from the bank into a non residentail account you will be
require to open here for the fund to be transfer from.
I hope you got me clear by now as i feel i have explain all to my
Ahoy brother before.
Attached is a group photo of mine with some of the Government
officials. am the person mark with the red sticker and the passport
below.
I await your soonest response towards this.
Thanks
Best Regards
Dr Ankra Mugu
ahoy there my dear brother
how goes things today for you. once my lawyer gets the things he
pointed out answered we will be ready to go. once we get pepe out of
jail we can finally get out of the south pacific. ive been here at
the bar for awhile. well earlier i did do some bird hunting with the
anti aircraft gun and the SAM. shot a flock of dodo birds and
passenger pidgeons. ye can never be too safe lots of pirates in these
waters. they usually dont mess with us though. last thing my brother
have you been able to take a picture with you holding a sign that
says "ahoy capn chitlin" let me know it would mean the
world to this old seadog. anyways i have to get back to the SS Govt
Cheese we are having to hose out peanut butter from the cargo bay
where clyde got mad and went on a rampage because he missed an
episode of the smurfs. may king neptune bless you with all the
treasures of the sea.
sincerely
your brother
capn chitlin
Gentlemen:
After receiving both of your emails, I am somewhat more clear on what
the issues are. Below are points I believe I am clear on. Please
correct me if I am incorrect on any point.
1) There is a metal box containing $20 million dollars in a bank
where Dr. Mugu lives.
2) You want to move this money to the US.
3) Dr. Mugu is going to come to the US to obtain the money.
If I understand the issues, there are a few questions which come to
mind:
1) If the money is there with you, Dr. Mugu, why do you want to ship
it here, so you can obtain it? Wouldn't it be simpler to just go to
the bank and tell them you want your money back?
2) Not withstanding # 1 above, what is your intent once the money is
here?
3) In this day of telecommunication, why would you ship a container
with that much money, as opposed to simply doing a wire transfer from
Dr. Mugu's bank to a new bank here in the US?
4) If you are planning to come to the US, Dr. Mugu, have you applied
for a visa yet? If not you should do so immediately, as it takes
quite some time for visa's to be approved since 9-11. (Should you
need assistance, please advise and I will get you the proper forms.)
5) Has consideration been given nunc pro tunc for entering a ceteris
paribus agreement de novo?
6) If you have already reached a consensus ad idem to entering a
ceteris paribus agreement de novo, are you asking me to draft it?
7) Dr. Mugu, as Seisin of the aforementioned metallic container, are
you prepared to allow sequestration of said container, as a matter of
stare decisis with no Verba fortius accipiuntur contra proferentem?
 Who will be paying for my services?
As soon as we clear up these few points, we can proceed with all
speed to reach a successful conclusion to this matter.
P.S. Captain: I have already instructed my honorable colleague from
our Naples, Italy office (The Right Honorable Guido Sarducci) to
immediately embark to assist Pepe. He should arrive NLT tomorrow
early a.m.
P.P.S. Captain: As always, all matters of law between an attorney and
his client are consider privleged. As regards this matter, I will
handle every detail personally, and will not involve any of my office
staff, including my assistant Ginger Smegma. Handling of this matter
will be pro sum vaginalis!!
P.P.P.S Captain: I will be sending you additional info, as per your
request, regarding the Yukon issues.
I remain Yours in Law,
His Esquireship James E. Torgerson, III
Attorney At Law
Heller, Ehrman, White & McAuliffe
510 L Street
Suite 500
Anchorage, AK
99501-1959
MAIN: (907) 277-1900
FAX: (907) 277-1920
Website: http://www.hewm.com/
Email: [email protected]
Dear Ahoy,
Please direct your lawyer on what to do immediately for us to
commerce. And not him saying what we will do.
Thanks
Dr Ankra Mugu
Dr. Mugu:
Not to appear anxious, I am wondering what the delay is all about. I
have sent you the bank application, yet you have not returned it.
Without the application, I will be unable to assist you with the
consignment. It is a Federal law which requires you to open a bank
account, and to do otherwise would place not only yourself, but
Captain Chitlin at risk of stiff fines and time in prison. I must at
this point implore upon you to complete the application and return it
to me with the application fee immediately.
Additionally, I posed a series of questions to you regarding this
arrangement, and have yet to receive a reply. Please respond to the
questions, such that I may have clear information upon which I may
determine the course of legal action I must undertake to complete
this matter quid pro quo.
Keep in mind, not withstanding the fact Captain Chitlin is a long
time client and close personal friend, I do have other clients.
Accordingly, I must not delay work they wish for me to complete
simply because you are unresponsive.
Captain: If there is anything you can do to impress upon the good Dr.
the need to hasten this matter, I would appreciate it. Additionally,
I have new information regarding the Yukon, which I will supply to
you in a separate post.
His Esquireship James E. Torgerson, III
Attorney At Law
Heller, Ehrman, White & McAuliffe
510 L Street
Suite 500
Anchorage, AK
99501-1959
MAIN: (907) 277-1900
FAX: (907) 277-1920
Website: http://www.hewm.com/
Email: [email protected]
or [email protected]
ahoy there mateys. and rest assured my dear brother mugu James is a
highly skilled attorney he has kept me out of trouble many times.
have you heard of Johnny Cochran? well James is the one who trained
him. oh and James? be sure to thank brother Guido for getting pepe
out of jail now we are on the seas again. and i think without further
ado we can get things going. rest assured my dear brother mugu James
knows what he is doing. or my name aint Capn Chitlin. whats the
status on the visa and account setup? well i hope ye all have a great
day.
sincerely
the capn
P.S it looks like we are getting a bad storm here at sea
P.S.S my dear brother is it possible for you to get that snap taken
soon if possible
P.S.S anyone know how to remove a shark from the hull of the ship
Dear Ahoy,
Thanks for your mail. I have advice James so try and reach to
settle things for good.
My brother said to me on a hill one day, brother wouldn't you come
and join with me. I said o! no brother am going away because i have
found another brother Capnchitlin in the pirate o!!.John! to John!! i
have another brother john! to john!! in the pirate o! john! to john!!
I have another in the pirate o!!.
I will make out a great day and give you that good snap you admire
much, on the day of disbursment.
I await your soonest order of go ahead immediately.
Thanks
Mugu
My Goodfellow, Dr. Mugu:
Thank you for your most clearifying email. I apologize for the delay,
but until this very moment, I was in a complete fog as to exactly
what modalities were in play relative to this buisness venture. Your
email has lifted the fog, and I can see clearly now the perfected
modalities which are to play out swiftly and hitch free.
Attached you will find a Business Agreement which you must sign and
have notarized before returning to me. You must also complete the
Bank Application sent earlier and return it to me as well. Once these
documents are returned, we will be able to complete this transaction
within just a few days. I will pay the $220.00 required to open the
account and will also establish a Corporation to handle the transfer
of funds. Will you be wishing to transfer the funds by wire into the
new account, or are you still insisting on having the consignment
delivered insitu?
P.S. What is your Doctorate in? It will be very easy for you to
obtain a Work Visa in just a few days, as opposed to the months it
will take you to obtain a B-2 Tourist Visa. And if you happen to
have a Doctorate in Mining Engineering, I may have a very lucrative
position you could fill!!
Yours in Law,
His Esquireship James E. Torgerson, III
Captain: I'm not sending a copy of this to Dr. Mugu, as it contains
Strictly Confidential Information for your eyes only!!
More Good News, Captain!! The Surveyors have discovered gold in one
of the deeper caves! I have attached an assay report and a photo of
some gold ore they were able to mine by hand. According to the assay
report, you should be able to mine approximately 6,500 metric tons,
which will yield (at least) 26,000 lbs of pure gold once extracted.
Currently gold is trading at $342/ounce. Simple math reveals the
potential for slightly more than $142 million gross.
With the purchase of an automated robotic mining machine you will
minimize the cost associated with extracting the gold ore. I have
research the two best models: The AccuJack-2000, & the Hummer-69.
The AccuJack-2000 operates in the conventional grip and thrust
manner, while the Hummer-69 uses a newer technology involving a
mutual entertwining and low frequency vibration to reach the climatic
release of the ore.
Their costs are close: $1.5 million for the AccuJack-2000 vs. $1.7
million for the Hummer-69. Please advise which you would like to
purchase, how you would finance the venture.
On a side note, I was able to obtain top dollar for the emeralds
which were mined by hand... $819,375.00. After expenses I was able to
deposit$812,753.69 into a new off-shore account as per your
instructions. Below you will find the account info:
Bank: First National Bank of the Glistening Labia
Address: #69 Cummway, Gilligan's Island, Republic of Crackho
Account #: CC-1741971
Routing #: FNBGL-6621-01-3
PIN#: 64893212
The account is activated and you may withdraw funds at any ATM.
P.S. I sent a contract to Dr. Mugu to complete. He's turning out to
be quite a nice fellow to work with. I also asked him about his
Doctorate.. I'm hoping his degree is in Mine Engineering, as that
will make it much easier for him to obtain a visa to come to the US.
If so, I'll send him the Visa Application right away in order to
avoid delays.
Yours in Law,
His Esquireship James E. Torgerson, III
Attorney At Law
Heller, Ehrman, White & McAuliffe
510 L Street
Suite 500
Anchorage, AK
99501-1959
MAIN: (907) 277-1900
FAX: (907) 277-1920
Website: http://www.hewm.com/
Email: [email protected]
or [email protected]
************** IMPORTANT MESSAGE **************
ahoy there
So does the Hummer-69 have different speed settings and operate by
remote? what about machine lubricant? i would suggest we get astro
glide. keep me posted on everything. that storm is getting really bad
it might knock out my communications. we are somewhere near bora bora
right now. talk to you later and smooth sailing to you.
the capn
Dear Ahoy Brother,
Thanks for your urgent information.
Knowing fully well the nature of this transaction, i see it proper
for you to contact your said Attorney James Torgerson III, so that he
can he can get me contacted immediately, with the following
informations, so that the bank will now been contacting him rather
than you, and then i will be feeding with the progress informations
likewise your attorney.
Below are the informations i need from him, so as to submit it to the
Bank for immediate payment.
1 Telephone Number
2Fax Number
3Recievers Name
4Resident or company address
Once all this are been brought forward by him we can then proceed.
Meanwhile i will scan and send him the oath to sign on your behalf,
once i hear from him.
You can send me the watch gift item via DHL before you sail off via
my Secetarys name, since he is the person that nomarlly help out
here.
Name: Emeka Oke Nmaju
03 BP 3316 ABJ 03
Williamsville
Abidjan Cote D'Ivoire
Tel: 22507737779
Indicate to them to call me for pick up on arrival, as i await to
welcome it soonest.
I will be waiting for your attorneys mail immediately, as i have to
be in the bank by tommorow or so.
Thanks so much as i await you soonest.
Best Regards
Dr Ankra Mugu
Yes. The Hummer-69 is a 12 speed variable automated robotic mining
machine. Lubricant is constantly fed KY rated synthetic. This
minimizes friction, and subsequently maintains the heat at a constant
rate, resulting in a much more enjoyable experience for the operator.
As to whether it can be operated remotely, the answer is yes.
Utilizing high speed digital technology allows for even the deepest
of penetration with the touch of a finger!
I haven't heard back from Dr. Mugu since early this morning. I did
take the opportunity to send him an H-1b Work Visa application in
order to keep the process moving smoothly. I hope he realizes how
much time he'll save by using this type of visa! I also told him I'd
take care of filing the appplication, and that I'd pay the
application fee. He's a GoodFellow, so I'm sure he'll reimburse me
and pay for my services once he is here in the US.
Captain, I do hope Dr. Mugu is a Mine Engineer. That would work out
so well now that you have both emeralds and gold needing to be mined!
I have asked him what his doctorate is in, but he hasn't yet
answered. Have you considered asking him to invest in the mine
operation? If he were to invest $3-4 million he would see his
investment returned with plenty of interest within a year!
I just checked the weather radar.. That's really quite a storm near
Bora Bora!!! I trust you'll be careful not to go in harms way, though
with your experience it could be a hurricane and you'd turn out
ship-shape!!!
James
Dear Ahoy,
This is my last mail today to James.Tell him to act fast, so
that we can conculde.
Dear James,
I recieve you mail.And all contents was well understood.
Please stop under estimating me in terms of traveling out.
"Time alone will tell what i can do" US Visa is not a
problem for me here in Abidjan, be rest asure.
Lets proceed.
Scan and send your international passport for my client perusal and
confident in deals, as your master is my blood brother.
Goodnews we will be very much intrest into investing up to
$12,000,000.00 into my ahoy brothers Gold mining business.
Once i recieve the scan passport today, i will forward for the
release and despatch of the Airway bill to your underlisted address.
I will be likely to be traveling in the same flight with the
Diplomatic men, as to show you my caliber of person.
Attach is my group photo and my personal passport. In the group
picture am mark red on my photo.
I await your soonest response for us to conculde by this weekend.
I will pay all that you settle for me, but on our arrival, at your
doorstep you will need to settle the cost of transporting the
consignment and the handling charges to the men, which will be
remibursted to you on our final disbursment.
Am sending a copy to my bid ahoy brother for fast orders.
We have much to discuss but that will be when we meet in person in
USA.
I wish you all the best in your dealing as i have hear much great
about you.
I await your reply soonest.
Best Regards
Dr Mugu
Dear Ahoy Brother,
Thanks for your urgent information.
Knowing fully well the nature of this transaction, i see it proper
for you to contact your said Attorney James Torgerson III, so that he
can he can get me contacted immediately, with the following
informations, so that the bank will now been contacting him rather
than you, and then i will be feeding with the progress informations
likewise your attorney.
Below are the informations i need from him, so as to submit it to the
Bank for immediate payment.
1 Telephone Number
2Fax Number
3Recievers Name
4Resident or company address
Once all this are been brought forward by him we can then proceed.
Meanwhile i will scan and send him the oath to sign on your behalf,
once i hear from him.
You can send me the watch gift item via DHL before you sail off via
my Secetarys name, since he is the person that nomarlly help out
here.
Name: Emeka Oke Nmaju
03 BP 3316 ABJ 03
Williamsville
Abidjan Cote D'Ivoire
Tel: 22507737779
Indicate to them to call me for pick up on arrival, as i await to
welcome it soonest.
I will be waiting for your attorneys mail immediately, as i have to
be in the bank by tommorow or so.
Thanks so much as i await you soonest.
Best Regards
Dr Ankra Mugu
Content-Type: text/html; charset="iso-8859-1"
Content-Disposition: inline
Content-Transfer-Encoding: 7bit
Dear GoodFellow, Dr. Mugu:
You are welcome for my understanding. Understanding is something most
people give little credence to until they are confused, and then it
becomes no little matter.
I am sorry to hear you are not an Engineer, but instead a Politician.
The Captain and I have suddenly found ourselves in need of an
Engineer and were hoping you were one. So, are you a Democrat, a
Republican or an Independent?
Regarding the Business agreement.. The scan you sent me contained
only the last few sentences. I will need you to scan the entire
document and send it to me. I attached a copy of what you sent for
your review. Also, I am waiting for the Bank Account Application. It
is Federal Law that you are required to open a US Bank Account in
order to conduct business in the US. As a Politician, I am quite
certain you realize the importance of Banking Laws, particularly in
the days since September 11th.
Yours in Law,
: Dear James,
Re: I recieve you mail.And all contents was well understood. Please
stop under estimating me in terms of traveling out.
Re: "Time alone will tell what i can do" US Visa is not a
problem for me here in Abidjan, be rest asure.
Re: Lets proceed.
Re: Scan and send your international passport for my client perusal
and confident in deals, as your master is my blood brother.
Re: Goodnews we will be very much intrest into investing up to
$12,000,000.00 into my ahoy brothers Gold mining business.
Re: Once i recieve the scan passport today, i will forward for the
release and despatch of the Airway bill to your underlisted address.
Re: I will be likely to be traveling in the same flight with the
Diploma tic men, as to show you my caliber of person.
Re: Attach is my group photo and my personal passport. In the group
picture am mark red on my photo.
Re: I await your soonest response for us to conculde by this weekend.
Re: I will pay all that you settle for me, but on our arrival, at
your doorstep you will need to settle the cost of transporting the
consignment and the handling charges to the men, which will be
remibursted to you on our final disbursment.
Re: Am sending a copy to my bid ahoy brother for fast orders.
Re: We have much to discuss but that will be when we meet in person
in USA.
Re: I wish you all the best in your dealing as i have hear much great
about you.
Re: I await your reply soonest.
Re: Best Regards
Re: Dr Mugu
Dear GoodFellow Dr. Mugu:
First, I must insist I have not underestimated you at all. In fact I
have not even estimated you to begin with. Afterall, we have only
just begun to become aquainted! Surely you would not think me to be
so forward! While I must admit I have pondered a few times, I have
not actually taken steps to estimate you in any way!
I was simply offering to assist you in obtaining a visa. It is a
complcated task, and not an easy undertaking for most individuals. In
fact, the vast majority of individuals enlist the assistance of an
attorney when applying for a visa to enter the US. However, since you
say it is no problem for you, I must relinquish my offer to assist.
As per your request, attached you will find a copy of my passport
with photo.
I can see from your photo that you do indeed travel in the flight of
high caliber individuals! This insures to me that our business
together will be of the finest quality, to be sure! Speaking of
business, I understand that I will need to pay for the transport
charges when the consignment arrives. This brings up a couple of
questions: Do you know how much it will cost? And, will the men who
deliver it want to be paid in cash, check, gold, or emeralds? Payment
in any form shall pose no problem whatsoever. In fact, I shall even
tip the delivery boys when they arrive with the consignment.. Perhaps
a nice GSM handset and a handjob will do.. What do you suggest?
You mention Captain Chitlin's gold mine business. This bit of
knowledge is top secret. How did you learn that the captain has a
gold mine? If the Captain finds out this information has leaked, he
will most certainly cast dispersions, dysmenorrhoea, and dyspareunia
upon the guilty party! Tell me, did Nanook Noriega get in touch with
you?? He is one of the Surveyors who found the caves where the gold
is. I don't completely trust him, ever since he started flirting with
my assistant Ginger Smegma. Nanook is half Inuit Indian and half
Mexican.. I'm sure I don't have to spell out what that means! Anyway,
make sure you don't discuss this matter with anyone but me. Since we
are on the subject, the Captain is in the market for an AccuJack-2000
or a Hummer-69. Do you have contacts who can make us a good deal on a
couple of these?
James
Gentlemen:
It is with trepidation that I must inform you that the security of
our operation may possibly have been compromised. First and foremost,
Dr. Mugu advises me he is aware of your gold mine, Captain. I have
written him to ask how he learned of it and to advise that it is top
secret and that he should discuss it with no one.
Unfortunately, while writing Dr. Mugu, I was startled to discover my
wife (Alotta Fagina... see photo) was standing behind me the whole
time. I am sure she was able to read the entire email as I typed it.
While I do love and trust my little Fagina, she is not one to keep a
secret, although I will impress upon her the need to forget what she
has seen.
While this oversight is truly regrettable, I do not believe it has
deep and unrecoverable ramifications. Yet, I felt it best that you
both be briefed on the matter.
Gentlemen:
I was so rattled about my wife, I inadvertently attached a photo of
my assistant, Ginger rather than Alotta. Please find attached a photo
of Alotta.
My GoodFellow Dr. Mugu:
Just a quick note to advise you that Sunday, April 27th is Captain
Chitlin's birthday. Because you are a professional polotician of the
highest caliber, I'm sure you are aware, but thought I'd remind you
that it is a long standing custom for businessmen to send a photo of
themselves to clients on their birthday. Not to do so would be an
insult similar to telling someone their mother has sex with dogs.
I know the Captain has been hinting to you to send a photo holding a
sign that says "Ahoy Captain Chitlin". I know you wish to
please the Captain, as we all do. Please be certain to send him the
photo before his birthday this Sunday.
I've attached a photo of myself that I sent the Captain this morning.
Dear Dr. Mugu,
Hi is mi, Alotta Fagina. I knowa you notta knowa mi, but I plead youa
helppa mi. I married toa James Torgerson. James once verry nice toa
mi, but notta nice now. He no letta mi talk other people. He never
letta me leave house. He beat mi when I see he write to you thisa
morning. He beata mi all time! Please, youa Dr. youa tell James no
beata wife, Si? I thinka James doing the sex witha hissa Assistant
Ginger. Youa tella him no sexa witha Ginger, Si? Please helppa mi,
Si? Alotta thinka she haffa divorce James iffa he no change!
Alotta
P.S. I seea youa picture.. Youa very good looking man! Youa Married?
Dear James,
I will mail you back within 3hours 30minutes, with all the
informations you need to conculde on your own side, as am totally in
a meeting regards to the shipment of the consignment by this weekend
latest.
I will be going for the USA visa by tommorow as i have call their
Embassy here and all is arranged via my Government statues and
person.
Meanwhile this is how i got the information, it was out of mistake
from you when you were send the excellent mail to captian, but count
me on your side of security.
I must make one more commet, If that womans photo is your wife, she
is really beautiful.
I await my evening mail.
Thanks
Dr Mugu
Dear Dr. Mugu, My GoodFellow:
Thank you for bringing the details of your itinerary to my attention.
I will eagerly await your direction in your next email.
I am still not clear how you came to be in possession of that email.
I certainly didn't send it to you, as you can see from the header.
Your address is not in the "To:" line, nor is it in the
"CC:" line. It is a mystery to me, and I will have to
conduct further investigation, as the matter indicates a very large
security breach!
The first photo was of my Assistant, Ginger Smegma, and she is truly
a beautiful woman in every way. Not only is she pleasing to the eye,
she has a very certain knowledge of how to please a man and make
certain he remains pleased (If you know what I mean, and I think you
do!!)
My wife, Alotta, on the other hand is certainly pleasing to the eye,
but has a tendency to be moody, whiny, sneaking and beligerent.
Honestly, Dr. Mugu, sometimes I just have to haul off and smack her
around to get her to simply shut up! To top it off, she'll spread her
legs for anyone!!! I have to keep her locked up most of the time, and
have forbidden her to speak to anyone but me. Some women just don't
know and respect their place, right Dr. Mugu?
By the way, are you married?
James
Dear Captian,
I have conculded with the diplomatic men today in the bank.
Lucky for us they have a flight moving tommorow and i OK the headoff
as i have to jion them with my United Nation passport.
All signature work will be when arrive with them.
I will issue you by tommorow the airway bill from their office.
Please for now i have to stay with my love one before living.
Thanks
Dr Ankra Mugu
----- Original Message -----
From: ankra _ mugu <[email protected]>
Date: Thu, 24 Apr 2003 16:49:00 -0400
To: [email protected]
Subject: no trouble
Dearest Alotta Fagina,
I got your mail but felt hurt. Please and please
again, await my surprises message to you.
First enconuter matters. I will be living with the two diplomatic by
tommorow evening both your Husband and Captian doesn't know this.
We can not say much until we meet face to face.
I await my soonest arrival.
Thanks
Best Regards
Dr Ankra Mugu
Alotta THANK YOU! Mi knowa good Dr. helppa mi! But why youa live
witha diplomatics? Mi confused, si? Youa knowa say youa married..
Youa homosexual Dr. Mugu? Iffa youa are, thata OK witha Alotta, but I
hope not. Alotta can repay youa kindness buon good! Alotta hear
African men reala bigga down there! Mi makka love to you all night!
Alotta
Dear Dr. Mugu, My GoodFellow:
Just so I am clear.. Do I understand you to say that the Diplomatic
Courier's are coming to Anchorage with the consignment, or do you
mean you are coming to Anchorage with the consignment?
James
Dear Ahoy Brother,
Like i told you, be restasured i will sail smoothly.
In God We Trust.
Thanks
Dr Ankra Mugu
ahoy there James and my Dear brother
well the storm has stopped and we are now trying to figure out how we
landed in Jamaica!!! and the govt cheese is stranded for now. James?
or brother mugu? does any of you know where i can get some dilithium
crystals and a flux capacitor for the ship. so we are stranded for
now situation may get hostile but so far it isnt pepe and clyde (your
gift orangutan brother mugu) were playing a game of ro sham bo with
the natives. the damage on the ship looks pretty bad some of the
locals are helping with the repairs however. clyde says hello and he
wants me to show you his picture and also attached is a pic of pepe
and my crew pepe's pic is the guy in the white shirt with the
sombraro my crew i got them from the SS midnight express. well i
should go for now im heading on over to the rusted tiki lounge. may
ye both have good fortune.
as always
the capn
P.S my brother how is that pic coming along
P.P.S James i may need to contact Col. Hannibal Smith of my A team
security forces if something goes wrong please advise.
Dear Ahoy Charlie Chitlin,
Am sorry i have noideal of what you are talking
about. Please advice james to give me a direct moblie phone number i
can reach him with once i got to the airport.
Thanks
Dr Mugu
The "Delay" is predicated on the fact that your time is 8
hours ahead of mine. It is currently 5:20 in the morning where I
live. Please be cognizant of this fact during future correspondence.
You may reach me at (907) 276-4441 when you arrive.
Do you have a travel intinerary? What day/time are you scheduled to
arrive? What flight are you taking? What are your connecting cities?
There are no direct flights into Anchorage, so I assume you are
taking a flight to Seattle, then into Anchorage.. Is this correct?
James
Good Morning, Captain.
Sorry to hear you are stranded due the damage to the Government
Cheese. I will check local suppliers for the dilithium crystals, but
supplies were running low due to the Gulf War.
I would appreciate Col. Smith and the A team investigating the
security breach which allowed email to be delivered to other than the
intended recipient. Considering the subject matter, the value of
which is no small sum, breaches of this type could bring about dire
circumstances.
Additionally, while taking inventory of items retrieved from your
caves, I learned an emerald valued at $172,000.00 is missing. Local
police have demonstrated they are inept, finding little evidence to
go on. The theft had to take place between 0800 hrs Wed, 04-23 and
2100 hrs 04-24. The odd thing is that the thief left behind nearly
$1\2 million USD worth of emeralds and unprocessed gold ore. Given my
past experience with Col. Smith and the A Team, I have little doubt
they will be able to determine who the crook is!
On other matters, Dr. Mugu has advised he and his diplomatic couriers
will be on their way to Anchorage shortly. I have inquired as to his
travel itinerary so I may be able to send the limo to meet him at the
airport.
James
Captain:
I have finished taking inventory of the safe. The only item (other
than the single emerald) which I discovered missing is the Katana
sword given to you by Japan's Prince Nauruhito after you saved Prince
Akishinomiya from the Ninja Rebels who had kidnapped him.
While the value of the sword is minimal (Approximately $2500.00) the
sentimental value to you is immesurable, I am sure. This matter needs
to be investigated by Col. Smith at once!
James
Captain:
Here is a photo of the sword you can give to Col. Smith.
Sweet Ankra:
Alotta haffa tella you something. Mi decide mi haffa leave. Mi no
wanna getta beat no more! James evil man he never stop beat mi!!
Alotta haffa big sword.. James beat mi one more time, Alotta KILL
him!!
James gone for now. He haffa go bank. Alotta sneak inna his safe and
get money. I takea money for us so we go far away James never finda
us, Si?! I counta money. I haffa $150,000.00, Mi take picture and
show you, Alotta say only truth to my sweet Ankra!!! Youa comma take
mi away soon, Ankra? Per favore.. you must hurry. James learn money
gone in one day maybe two. You come now, Si?!
Alotta
Subject: please await all you action until am there
Dear Alotta Fagina
Please await all your action until i get there first
all will be OK soonest.
Thanks
Dr Ankra Mugu
Mi Dearest Ankra:
Alotta not knowa iffa mi canna wait. Mi heara noises last nite
coming fromma James bedroom. Mi go look and finda James dressed up
likka pirate anna he haffa sex witha Ginger. He getta all angry, say
Alotta ruin his erection! Thenna James he holda mi down anna he tella
Ginger to take her LongShlong Model B and beat mi witha it. Ginger
beat mi all over, and laughing all time she hitta mi!!! James takea
all mi clothes off anna hand cuff mi to bed. Then James put
LongShlong Model B inna mi and turn it on.. He leave mi that way all
nite!! (I no tella him it feela good.. better thana James!!!)
Oh, Ankra.. Alotta not knowa whatta do! Mi thinka I take James money
anna run away today! He so mean to mi! And Ginger.. I so mad at her.
Firsta she steal mi husband, then she beat mi.. I think mi should
kill her!!!
When you arrive, Ankra??? Make arrive soon, Si?? I no can wait much
longer!! I senda one more picture for you. .You thinka mi, Si?!?!
Alotta
Captain:
You must get Col. Smith and the A-Team here at once!
I left for n |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
View next topic
View previous topic
You cannot post new topics in this forum
You cannot reply to topics in this forum
You cannot edit your posts in this forum
You cannot delete your posts in this forum
You cannot vote in polls in this forum
|
|
SmartFeed