Chicken Man Part 3

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Baiting Guru Joined: 25 Jul 2017 Posts: 2107

Last year a group of us successfully safaried some aspiring chicken farmers to neighbouring countries. Chicken Man #1 went only to Benin. Chicken Man # 2, better known as Lucky, had a double safari covering thousands of miles and never did find his elusive package. Now, after baiting a lad since June 2018, he seems ready to go into the chicken business himself. Quite a change of careers for a consignment box specialist!

He has successfully made a business plan and submitted it to a church member who has forwarded it the Outreach Committee for consideration. The church loves helping farmers since they produce food. He is anxious to get his money. Very anxious. Multiple messages just today regarding his status.

We want to start his emotional roller coaster ride early, so he was informed that social distancing here has delayed the committee decision.......so he wrote

please i will plead that you should assist me to hasten
up for the approval of the proposal, so that i can commence on it as
soon as possible sir.

My character replied:

Quote:

I promise to do all in my power to hurry this along. We know people are depending on us. I spoke on the phone with one of our committee members and they are looking favourably upon your application. They really like the idea that you will not only be working, but feeding people. Our church believes quite strongly in the adage of give a man a fish and he is fed for a day. Teach him to fish and he is fed for life.

Soon, no doubt, he will be approved. Due to possible border issues with the virus pandemic, we are hoping to safari him within Nigeria itself. It is a big place.

Posted: Thu Mar 19, 2020 5:09 am

We are here to assist him and make everything his trip unforgettable. Laughing

Posted: Thu Mar 19, 2020 1:09 pm

See https://forum.419eater.com/forum/viewtopic.php?t=304073

Baiting Guru Joined: 25 Jul 2017 Posts: 2107

Understood.

Posted: Thu Mar 19, 2020 1:54 pm

When the safari-restrictions are lifted again. I'm ready to play along also. You can always tell that the committee wants to wait with sending things until the corona crisis is under control.

Posted: Thu Mar 19, 2020 2:02 pm

^^ i'm in too! Abdul Sasamo is ready for action again Very Happy

Baiting Guru Joined: 25 Jul 2017 Posts: 2107

This lad is the recipient of an award from the Outreach Committee, however, he understands he is not the only one. Just as in the "Lucky" bait, there are multiple winners. The committee must show their concern and compassion for the winners, while following the travel restrictions in place.

So the plan is to proceed to the shipment phase, send out the packages to the various "winners", and then have the shipper suspend delivery due to restrictions put on them by some nebulous gov't agency. This helps the long term bait by showing the good intentions of the committee are demonstrated, and keeps the lad's trust level high. It also puts the package beyond the reach of the committee as it is locked up in a warehouse somewhere awaiting clearances etc. The lad can blame the shipper, but they can pass the buck by blaming gov't regulations. This then means the lad is on the hook, he will have proof of the pot of gold waiting at the rainbow, but must wait for the crisis to pass. Hopefully this keeps him on the hook.

Posted: Thu Mar 19, 2020 3:27 pm

While you are waiting for the travel ban to be lifted is there any paperwork he could be completing in the meantime? I feel sure that there must be a whole new raft of burocracy (that doesn't look like a real word) that has to be sorted out beforehand.

Baiting Guru Joined: 25 Jul 2017 Posts: 2107

IG, the lad was just sent a request by his sponsor to the committee (me) to send a sketch of his farming operation to help people here envision his dream. If successful, it could almost double his award.
You are quite right, he must be kept busy.

Posted: Fri Mar 20, 2020 6:40 pm

Then there is the Foot & Mouth certificate, the Avian Flu documentation, his livestock export/import licence, you'll need to see all those if you haven't already. Being a legit chicken man he'll no doubt have all those to hand ready for you. I read somewhere that it's worth a 25% bonus once he has submitted them.

Baiting Guru Joined: 25 Jul 2017 Posts: 2107

So far the lad is doing what most lads do.....asking for more! He was "approved" for $11,500. Now he is upping it to $30,000 with his expanded operational plans. Naturally, the committee is going to consider this and hopefully come up with the funds.
He has still not sent his sketches of the farm. He sent stock images of chicken barns, but the committee doesn't want other people's dreams represented, they want the lad's.

The good news is that the church has been busy printing various colours and sizes of the company t-shirts for the lad's employees, and coffee mugs etc. All these promotional items will be sent in the package for him to help get his scam chicken farm started.

Baiting Guru Joined: 25 Jul 2017 Posts: 2107

Things have slowed down in all my baits and our chicken farmer who was about to safari, has a reprieve. His greed is intact though, though his slothfulness
is still in effect. He was asked for a sketch of his proposed "dream chicken farm". He offered up the following:

Since he was asked for a perspective sketch, this drawing is inadequate. He replied it was the best he could do beccause:

Quote:

there is no way i can provide the 3D sketch
of my Farm operation, because it will really involve some amount of
money,

I sent him a google image of a crude sketch for him to emulate, and then explained the true reasons behind it all.

Quote:

There is a "hidden" reason, which I will now share. (Taking him into a confidence....) We have a lady on the committee who always takes the "simple" images our candidates send, and as an artist, she makes them look professional and we send a framed and matted picture back. It is sort of a tradition here to do so as a gesture of best wishes for a successful new business. (A tradition which just started....) It does not need to be all the buildings, just pick one, do a quick sketch like the example and Larissa will make it into a masterpiece for you, all framed, matted and wonderful. Years from now when you become one of the richest and most successful chicken farmers in Nigeria, you will look back at that sketch with pride. You don't need to spend money, just a crude image will be magically made wonderful!

Hopefully he will comply quickly. If he does, he might even get some more funding.

Posted: Wed Apr 01, 2020 4:38 pm

That's very generous of him to provide lodging for both the workers and security personnel. I'm pretty sure in the real world the cost of all those structures, equipment, land and livestock would cost significantly more than $30k. Surely he isn't planning to take the money and run off with it is he? How sad is it that he says he's ready to build a chicken empire from scratch yet can't be bothered to sketch a building in 3D. Was he planning to use AutoCAD or something? He should draw the whole damned compound for being so lazy. If idiot Lucky could do it then this bone head can too.

Baiting Guru Joined: 25 Jul 2017 Posts: 2107

If he follows thru, and he had better, there will be other assigned tasks beyond sketches. He still needs a company logo......