Peter, a funny nigerian scammer - 4x Safari

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Posted: Wed Feb 05, 2020 7:23 am

^^^ LOL! Of course, Joojoo has some special talents, no doubts here! Laughing

08.20 - Just for our fun... Umukelani's very angry on Peter:

Quote:

Why do you ignore my messages and why don't you answer questions? What happened yesterday? You took the money and the parcel and now you're gone? I knew this was going to happen and I knew I couldn't trust you, you fucking idiot! This is the business I thought 100% and you took advantage of me to steal everything and disappear. Fuck you and your whole family! You will die poor and thunder will be on all your generations! I will make few pig sacrifices for Ogun and you will die as soon as you touch the iron. You will see!

Muhahahaha... Peter to Umukelani:

Quote:

They have put me on so many stress because I have waited for them from afternoon to night yesterday at Cotonou but they don't come. And this is their messages this morning, I told you to stop bothering me and I will update you immediately everything is ready.

and

Quote:

Don't make me feel angry with you because if you do you will regret it, because I don't like the way your spoke to me now.

Umukelani, more angry. Laughing

Quote:

Fuck you! I do not believe your shit story and I am convinced that you have already stolen everything and lie to me. Why didn't you go straight to their office to pick up the package there? Can you answer me this simple question? Why did you prefer to wait like a fool all day long, instead of taking a taxi and going where they are? Stupid fucking Idiot, we have $7,000 in that fucking parcel and you could pay a driver to take you there by car and wait for you until everything was settled. You're a fool and I'm afraid you'll ruin everything. I am sorry that I have accepted to offer you this business because you are not able to do anything good. Tomorrow I'll go to church and try to find out what the truth is.

Peter will be pleased to read these words, I'm so sure! Laughing

===

08.36 - Peter to my manager Emoje:

Quote:

Dear Sir,

Thank you for your service.
I will be in Cotonou at Place de I'Etoile Rouge by 12:00pm and wait for him to come meet there.

Thank you
Peter

08.47 - Peter responds to Umukelani:

Quote:

I'm telling you all the truth, you can message me in a good manner because if you get a angry you will regret it because I told you several times that I can not steal your part but if you don't trust me then you can think as you do.

===

10.40 - Everything will be fine, Mr. Lad... do not worry! Laughing

Quote:

Salam Sir,
All right, then I will talk to Joojoo to come directly to you and deliver the rest of the packages only after he will finish with you.
I will be leaving my office for the next few hours because I have the obligation to escort an HVC parcel somewhere in the north of the country.
I'll talk to Joojoo right now and I'll arrange everything so that the delivery runs smoothly. Don't forget to send him a picture when you get to the meeting place.

Once again, we apologize for any discomfort created yesterday and we hope you will remain our client in the future.
Mash'Allah!
Emoje

- The manager will be absent in the next few hours, so he will not respond to messages until late.
- Joojoo will get drunk and will be unable to drive the car... Peter will be forced to go to Bohicon, or to return home empty-handed.
It will be another wonderful day in Benin! Laughing

===

10.55 - Umukelani continues to stress our idiot. Laughing

Quote:

Ok, but I really don't understand why you don't take a taxi and you don't go directly there to them at their headquarters. It's the most logical and intelligent move you can make. In a big business like this you have to think properly, and the money and products out there are a huge value that justifies a small effort and a minimal expense. You agree with me? Finally, I expect you to give me good news today, ok?

===

12.45 - No sign from our boy, so my manager Emoje writes to him:

Quote:

Salam Sir,
Everything is fine, did you meet Joojoo and complete the delivery?
The battery from his phone seems to be discharged or he is not in an area with GSM signal.
Please confirm that all the things went according to our plan.

Mash'Allah!
Emoje

Theoretically, now he should have reached the meeting place... Laughing

Posted: Wed Feb 05, 2020 1:32 pm

The 2nd Safari!

12.54 - Peter writes to Joojoo...

Quote:

Dear Joojoo

I am in Cotonou at Place de I'Etoile Rouge opposite the Samsung office.

He sent a picture supposed to be "new", but that was actually made yesterday (can be seen after EXIF).

Of course, Joojoo is not an idiot and noticed this. Laughing

Quote:

NO NO DIS IZ UNA PICTUR FO YESTERDAY AN DA REGULATIONE REQURES DHAT DA PITURES BI MADE ON DA DELVERY DAY
SO AM WIL WAITNIG FO UNA FRESH TODAY PICTUR OK ?
DA MECHANIC IZ ALMOSTE DONE WIDH REPARATIONE AN IN 3OMINUTEES AM WIL START TO COTONU
SEND MI DA RIGHT PICTUR MADE FO TODAY OK

===

Five minutes later, Peter wrote to the manager:

Quote:

Dear Sir

I'm at Place de I'Etoile Rouge, wait for him to come meet me there.

Thank you
Peter

Mr. Emoje, innocent:

Quote:

Salam Sir!
It's perfect! Last time I talked to Joojoo a few hours ago and the mechanic was working on the car.
I think he is already on his way to his destination. Please keep me updated.

Mash'Allah!
Emoje

14.09 - Emoje to Peter... another message with some necessary clarifications. Twisted Evil

Quote:

Salam Sir,
I talked right now to Joojoo and seemed extremely agitated and upset. He said you sent him the same picture as yesterday? It is true? He is afraid that everything will be a trap. Dear Sir, our internal regulations impose a certain behavioral conduct and those pictures required for our clients who benefit from the biometrical authentication procedure (BIP) must be made at the exact time of delivery. If you sent to Joojoo one of the pictures made yesterday, please redo everything again and send Joojoo a new-fresh picture taken right now. Preferably in a different position than yesterday, so that there will be no doubt about this fact.

Mash'Allah!
Emoje

It is a good opportunity to change the day's plan a little:
- Joojoo became suspicious when he saw that Peter sent the same picture (as yesterday).
- Joojoo opened the parcel and discovered the money hidden there. Ooooohhhhh! Laughing

- Joojoo runs away to Togo and invites Peter to share "the pillow and the money"... Homosexual pleasures of JooJoo will appear in the story. Laughing

14.22 - Joojoo to the lad:

Quote:

AM ALREDY HAV STOP DA CAR AN DO NO INTEND TO APEAR DHERE IF AM NO RECIEVE GOOD PICTUR TAKEN TODAY
BOS EMOJE ALWEYS TEL US TO PAY ATENTIONE TO ANEY FRAUD ATEMPTE AN TO KEEPE UR AEYES OPEN OPEN
DO YU HAV SOMTHEEN TO HIDE FO MI OR FO UHAT REZON YU TRIEED TO CHEET MI SENDEENG UNA PICTUR TAKAN YESTRADEY ?

===

Finally, we have some fresh trophies... Safari #2 is confirmed! Laughing

Peter to Joojoo:

Quote:

Here is the for today, and I have already waited for 2 hours here.

and

Quote:

Dear Joojoo,

I hope all is fine now.

No, dear lad ... nothing is fine there and you will have to face some complications! Laughing

===

Peter responds to Emoje... he's a little upset that he waited 2 hours, but still relaxed. Laughing

Quote:

Dear Sir,

He's still at the mechanic according to him while I have already waited for 2hours here.

Thank you
Peter

and

Quote:

Dear sir,

I have already refresh a new picture to him now as he said.

Thank you
Peter

Emoje, full of confidence:

Quote:

Salam Sir, please confirm when Joojoo comes to you and that everything is fine.

Mash'Allah!
Emoje

===

Posted: Wed Feb 05, 2020 2:04 pm

Congrats... again!
I guess he will need to come back tomorrow?

Posted: Wed Feb 05, 2020 2:29 pm

^^^ Unless he agrees to become Joojoo's "wife" Laughing

...

- I decided to finish the story with him sooner, because I want his despair to be greater than his anger.
- I intend to "hang him in the hook" with a new story about the Church of the Holy Lamb and I need him to be 100% cooperative and to believe that today only a very bad luck has caused the money to be stolen by Joojoo.
===

15.07 - Peter to my manager Emoje... our boy is still patient. Laughing

Quote:

Dear Sir

I have already sent him a new picture at the taxi park.

Thank you
Peter

and

Quote:

Dear Sir,

I hope he will be arrive here this afternoon because it have already pass 15:00pm.

Thank you
Peter

===

15.08 - Peter to Joojoo (attached is another photo):

Quote:

I hope all is fine now?

15.13 - Peter:

Quote:

Dear Joojoo,

I want to know when you will going to be here.

and

Quote:

Dear Joojoo,

I hope it's all well now.

Posted: Wed Feb 05, 2020 2:47 pm

15:47 Sister Dave

Quote:

Dear brother Peter,

Again you have not been communicating with me and we are wondering what's going on. It has been past noon already and I trust that you have received the parcel now and all is right so I expect you to send me a confirming message about the situation soon. I hope your travelin was prosperous and fruitful and you have returned to the orphanage safely.

Be blessed,
Sister Dave

Posted: Wed Feb 05, 2020 2:48 pm

15.45 - Joojoo discovers the money hidden in the parcel... oups, big big problem! Laughing

Quote:

WHO IS JESSY ? YUR GAYFREND OR YUR ACOMPLICE ?YU WANNA ROB MA VAN OOOOHHH
AM WAS SURE DHERE WAS SOMTHEENG DIRTEY ABOT YU
YU HAV UNA IMPOSTOR FACE AN NOW AM HAV CONFRIMATION
AM OPNED DA PARSEL AN AM DISCOVRED INSIDE UNA HUGE SUM 10000 DOLLA
IZ FORBIDAN AN ILEGAL TO TRANSPORT MONY IN PARSELS OOOOHHHH
WID DIS MONY AN LAP TOPS AND PHONES FO DA PACKAJ AM WIL LIV IN TOGO LIKE KEENG OF JUNGLE
IF YU WANN MI TO SHAAR FIFT-FIFT MONY YU HAV ACCEPTE TO BI MA WIFE FO UNA DAY
AM SAW YUR PICTURS IN RED PANTEES AN AM VERY VERY HORNY
YUR HOT LIPS AR PERFECT FO SUCKEENG MA HARD AN THICK DICK OK ?
YU CAN COM TO MI WID YUR GAYFREND JESSY BECUS AM ABEL TO FUCK YU BOTH HARD HARD UNA LONG DAY
YU WIL BI MA WIFE FO UNA DAY AN YU WIL DO AL MA HOMOSEXUALIST PLEZURES OK ?
IF YU NOT ACCEPT AM WIL DIZAPPER IN TOGO FO REVA AND YU WIL RECIEV NOTHEENG
YU HAV TO KEEP DIS SECRET AN NO SAY ANETHEENG TO MA BOS EMOJE OR TO POLIS OK ?
IF AM WIL SEE SOMTHEEN SUSPICIOS AM WIL RUNAWAY AN DIZAPEEAR QUICK QUICK
AM ON MA WAY TO TOGO AN AM WIL STOP TO SLEEP SOMUHER HERE
WAIT FO MI AN AM WIL INVIT YU AN YUR GAYFREND JESSY TO COM AT MA HOTEL OK ?

===

Posted: Wed Feb 05, 2020 2:51 pm

Perfect timing: Mike just sent this:

Quote:

Mr. Omezumba,I'm writing again in the morning here in Los Angeles to check in with you regarding your package again. It appears that the package is still marked as unclaimed in the shipping database. Is this still due to mechanical difficulties, or is there merely lag in the database and you have actually received your package? Please keep me informed, and if there's anything I can do for you let me know.

Cheers!-Mike

Observe how the two choices I give him are clearly wrong given Joojoo's latest message, but of course, I have no way of knowing that. I do hope the lad responds to me.

Posted: Wed Feb 05, 2020 4:54 pm

More fun with the moron. Laughing

15.57 - Peter to Joojoo:

Quote:

I'm tired of waiting so when are you going to be here.

and

Quote:

Dear Joojoo,

I have already waited for 4 hours here.

16.19 - Peter to Emoje:

Quote:

Dear Sir,

I'm tired of waiting for Joojoo because I don't know if he's coming or not

Thank you
Peter

Emoje, innocent 100%:

Quote:

Salam Sir,
He hasn't come to you yet? I'm shocked. He doesn't answer the phone and I don't know what happened today.
I will seek to inform myself and will return shortly to you with details.

Mash'Allah!
Emoje

17.19 - Peter to Emoje... it is funny that until this time he didn't say anything to Emoje about Joojoo finding the money and running away. Laughing

Quote:

Dear Sir

I am leaving at the place now because am tired of waiting for him.

Thank you
Peter

17.47 - Joojoo to our moron:

Quote:

AM ARIVED AT HILACONDJE BORDA AREA NEAR TOGO
AM WIL WAIT FO YU HERE TILL TOMOR NIGT
IF YU WIL COM AM WIL GIV YU HALF OF MONY AN HALF OF ELCTRONICS PRDOUCTS
BUT YU WIL HAV TO SUCK MA DICK OK ?
IF YU DO NO COME AM WIL CROS DA BORDA IN TOGO AN AM DIZAPEEAR FO REVAR

18.00 - Peter is trying to negotiate with Joojoo... he seems to not understand what happened. Laughing

Quote:

Dear Joojoo,

I don't have any deal with you about share anything so better complete your job.

18.30 - Joojoo:

Quote:

YU ARE JUS A LITTEL STOPID GAY PIKIN
IZ ILEGAL TO HIDE MONY IN PARSELS SO YU CANT REPORT MI TO POLIS
MA BOS PROBABEL KNOW NOTHEENG ABOT DIS MONY
ALL YU CAN DO IZ AGREE TO BI MA WIFE FO UNA DAY OK ?
AM LIKE YUR HOT LIPS AN AM WANNA FUCK YU
AM IN BENIN NEAR TOGO BORDA AN AM WIL WAIT YU TILL TOMORO NIGT
AM WIL BUY YU UNA YELLO NICE DRESS AN SOM RED HIGHHEELD SHOUES OK ?

===

Just to annoy him. Laughing

18.45 - Umukelani wrote to our idiot:

Quote:

What kind of good news do you have for me? You solved the problem, do we have the parcel and the money? Can I send my father to you to give him those $3500 that you owe me from that sponsorship money? After you will sell the electronic products I will give you my bank account to deposit my share of money there. OK?

Starting with the following days, after he will quarrel and mock the idiot, Umukelani will propose to Peter one last "big deal": The establishment of a new parish of the Church of the Holy Lamb. We hope to achieve beautiful and consistent results: the Baptism ceremony with milk and honey + a beautiful Pyramid of Faith. Laughing

PS: Regardless of the final result, I want to thank Linoline for all the help she has provided throughout this funny little story. clapping

===

19.04 - Peter is either completely stupid or just trying to deny the bad reality. Twisted Evil

Quote:

I am not what you think and leaving Cotonou now then you will going to deliver the package at Nigeria border

Joojoo:

Quote:

YU AR UNA FOOL AN UNA IMBECIL WHOU NO UNDASTAND NOTHEENG
AM TOOK ALL MONY AN LAP TOPS AN PHONES AN AM WIL GO TO TOGO
YU CANONT CLAIME ANTHEENG BECUS IZ ILEGAL TO PUT MONY IN PARSEL
IF YU AGRE TO SUCK MA DICK AM WIL SHAAR MONY WID YU
NOW AM GO TO DA BAR TO BUY SOM ESPENSIV LIQEUR AN TAKE 2 GAYBOYZ TO HAV FUN DIS NIGT
AM WIL WAIT YU TOMORO IF YU DECIDE FINALLEY YU WANNA DHOSE MONY OK ?

===

Posted: Wed Feb 05, 2020 7:28 pm

17:32

Quote:

Thank you sister Dave for your message, I am tired of the company service because they haven't deliver the parcel to me as they said yesterday.

Thank you sister Dave may God continue be with you for all your doing.

I am grateful to all Holy lamb church
Peter

20:24

Quote:

Dear brother Peter,

I am shocked by your message. What happened? Did you not communicate with them effectively? Were you at the wrong meeting place? What do you mean with they haven't deliver the parcel? What is going on and what will happen with the children now? Please tell me more. Where are you now? Are you allright. We will all be praying for you here and I hope you will shed some more light on todays situations soon.

Be blessed
Sister Dave

20:35

Quote:

Thank you sister Dave

I have waited them at the location where they choose to come deliver the package to me today but the agent haven't come as they said today.

I am grateful to all Holy lamb church
Peter

20:37

Quote:

Dear brother Peter,

You have to understand that I have not been present today and that I do not understand what is going on by this short message of yours. Please read my questions and take your time explaining exactly what is going on and where you are now and what will happen.

Be blessed
Sister Dave

Posted: Wed Feb 05, 2020 7:51 pm

20.17 - A completely shocked Peter Laughing

wrote to Joojoo:

Quote:

I don't understand what you are saying

Joojoo is ruthless in explanations. Laughing

Quote:

AM TOOK DA MONY AN YU CANOT COMPLEIN BECUS IZ ILEGAL TO TRANSPORT MONY IN DA PARSELS
IF YU NOT COM TO ME TO HAVE SEX YU WIL GET NOTHEENG AND AM WIL RUN TO TOGO OK ?

===

Peter responds to Umnukelani... a short & sad answer:

Quote:

Noting good news from the company yet.

Umukelani to our boy... more pressure, more stress. Twisted Evil

Quote:

What the fuck? How? Why? Tell me everything, or I'll think you really stole everything.

===

Back to Joojoo's "dirty things". Twisted Evil

21.07 - Peter, still shocked:

Quote:

What are you talking about?

Joojoo:

Quote:

AM TALKEENG ABOT DHOSE 10000 DOLLA HIDEN IN PARSEL
WHICH YU CAN NO NO CLAIME BECUS DHEY AR ILEGAL
AM HAV 2 YOUNG BOYZ NEXT TO MI WHO DO ANYTHEENG FO ONLY 5 DOLLA
AM GOT SOM GOOD INDIAN WEED AN SOM LIQUEUR AN AM GOENG TO HAV FUN DISNIGT
WE WIL TALK TOMORO IF YU WANNA RECEIV 5000 DOLLA AN HALF OF ELECTRONCS GOODS

===

21.09 - Finally, Peter decided to tell all the story to Umukelani. Laughing

Quote:

Their local agent who choose to deliver the parcel, have searched the package and find the money in the package and he's now plan to run with the package

Umukelani's angry. Very angry.

Quote:

I don't think so, it's impossible. I can't believe you were so stupid to let a fucking driver search the parcels and find that fucking money. You are simply too stupid to be allowed to live! I told you to take a fucking taxi and go directly to the company office and take the package! You fucking idiot! Did we lose all the money and all the products? Jesus, I can't believe how stupid and incompetent you are. Are you so lazy that you preferred to stay home and let that idiot driver search our package? How was that possible? Tell me right now! Anyway, I'll check your fucking story tomorrow, at the church, because I still can't believe that you could be so stupid.

===

22.00 - Mr. Emoje, manager in Benin, wrote to our lad:

Quote:

Masah el Kheir,
Something strange is happening because I can't reach Joojoo. Did you manage to meet him today?
Normally, he should return to Parakou tomorrow night, but I don't know anything about him and I'm starting to be worried.
Please reply as soon as you see my message.

Mash'Allah!
Emoje

===

22.18 - Peter tries to impress Joojoo with a tearful story.

Quote:

All this is for an orphanage children

Joojoo seems to be insensitive to human suffering. Laughing

Quote:

AM AN ORPHEAN TOO SO COM TOMORO TO SUCK MA DICK OOOHH
AM WIL GIV YU 5000 AN HALFOF ELECTRONIC PRODUCTES OK ?

Posted: Wed Feb 05, 2020 9:36 pm