Return to sender => Baptism and a tiny pyramid

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Posted: Thu Aug 01, 2019 5:47 am

Well, all these things are becoming more and more difficult to control for our poor boy... he has already been proven to be a liar, now he has to prove that he has Faith! Laughing

- Yesterday he wrote to my Cardinal, to Father Paul and sister Dave:

Quote:

I'm sorry for the fake monument of faith picture, it was one bad idea of one my apostle but i have deleted him from apostle.
Forgive me church, forgive me cardinal william and paul Greeham it won't happen again. It was the work of the devil

Yesterday's chat (all in the morons timezone)

8:36
Cats: So U Won't Buy Me A Birthday Gift?
So U Won't Buy Me A Birthday Gift? After All The Surprise Present I Did For U

18:58
Anna: It's not your birthday and you fucking lied to everyone. If you didn't build that monument and faked a picture, you are not arrested at all, won't go to jail and don't need to pay some fake fine
It means that you are just a silly little liar
I hate that

21:47
Cats: Am sorry I lied about my birthday, I just needed a new phone

22:00
Anna: It's not only your fucking birthday you lied about. You tried to trick the church and all of us by sending a fake picture and claiming to have been in custody while you were not.
Do you have any idea how worried I was
And all this time you have just been lazy and didn't do anything that you promised to start the new parish..
How do you even expect us to get married this way
Cats: I'm sorry it was the work of the devil, it was one bad idea brought up by one of my apostle but I have removed him from my apostles
Anna: I can't believe you lied to me
Cats: It wasn't my fault I'm very sorry, am not lazy but if am lazy I wouldn't have done the first stage by carrying my apostles to the stream to divide the red sea but the building of monument of faith is too hard for because I have no land of my own to build it , I wished Cardinal William sent me the parish money I would have used the money to purchase my own land and build the pyramid there but he refused so I don't have any other choice
Anna: You always have another choice. Do you realize that they will forbid our marriage?
Cats: But am really sorry , I did all this because of you (I want to be with you forever) I would have quit to be a Reverend long time ago but I can't quit because of u
Anna:. Then fucking finish it so we can be together
Cats: I don't think I can anymore, I have sold everything I have to run the first, second stage
Anna: So you don't want to marry me anymore
Cats: I'm not supporting cardinal William to forbid the both of us from getting married but I can build the monument of faith when I have a land of my own, I can't build it in another man's land
I can only build it if cardinal William support me by sending the budget money to build my parish then I can finish my monument of faith there
Anna: But you know that will be sent after you finished this right? Can't you figure something out? Make a deal with someone to use the land and pay then due it when you get the parcel and the money
You know that without their permission I can not marry you

- After all this time still amazes me that these idiots easily lie... sometimes, their lies are so bad that I wonder if they really are idiots. Morons! Laughing

===

Thursday - 08.37 - Sister Dave writes to Cats:

Quote:

Dear brother Cats,

Thank you for finally being honest. I hope after all this time you realized that the truth will set you free and that lies will always see the light of day and bring you nowhere.

Because Jesus taught us to do so I will of course forgive you. A sinner came back on the right path, how can we not rejoice?

However the tasks still remain. You still need to build that monument and I strongly advise you to do it before the end of this month. I don't think the Cardinal or reverend Greeham will be equally forgiving of they hear about your lie without seeing any true results of your work. Personally I believe that they will definitively recall everything and not allow your marriage to sister Anna to continue.

When they return and you have built your monument, the parcel will be sent to you again, so I advise you to start working soon. You have four weeks, that should be enough. Please send me pictures of your progress regularly.

Be blessed
Dave Wilson

===

Posted: Thu Aug 01, 2019 11:27 pm

Yesterday, 22.30 - Our moron wrote to the cardinal, to sister Dave and Father Paul:

Quote:

Dear sister Dave, Your Excellency cardinal william Adam and Reveren Paul Greeham.

The problem & reason why i have not been replying your messages regularly or daily all this while is because my phone was stolen last month 18th August, i was robbed when coming back from the preaching the gospel at night by 10:00pm , i told cardinal william about my stolen phone.

About the fake monument of faith photos that was sent to you wasn't my intention or idea, i have been using one of my apostle mobile phone to reply messages on Gmail sometimes since my my phone was stolen. I didn't have any idea of what he did and he didn't told me anything about it. My account was logged by him in his phone and he used my Gmail account to upload the fake pyramid . I'm apologizing on his behalf for his sins, pls i want the church to forgive him for me but i have removed him from being my apostle totally and also i removed my Gmail account from his phone.

I met a man named Mr.Clement i told him i will be using his land to build the monument of faith but he said the total amount i will pay is #500,000 naira but i don't the amount when converted into your currency but he said first that am going to pay half of the money which is #200,000naira before i will be allowed to build my monument of faith in his land, you know i have financial problems and God also knows that as well, pls i am begging the church, council of elders, cardinal william Adam and Rev.paul in the name of the Lord to approve the budget of sending me $556 which is approximately #200,160naira in my own calculations here in our currency , i want the church to minus it out from my parish budget money so that i will be able to use it and give to Mr.Clement before i will be allowed to start the building of the monument of faith (pyramid) in his land, i will start work when i receive the budget money immediately And also before i forget, Mr.Clement land is the place am going to use to build my parish. I will attach Mr.Clement photos to you. God bless Eater church

Be blessed in the holy spirit of the Lamb,
Reveren Obi*** Chibu***.

He attached these 2 photos:

BUT

- Do you remember "that" father's friend, whom Cats wanted to use to get the parcel (see his Driver License on page 6)?
- This is THE MAN! We already have his ID and, of course, his name is NOT Clement... not at all.
- His real name is Laughing

In that message for Claude (July 22), our idiot also sent these photos:

Quote:

Dear sir claude,
No need of using my BIP identification again for i have found solutions to our problem. I have met my dad's best trusted friend who has a driver license, he will be the one to receive the parcels i will attach his driver license photos right now. Pls do not freeze the shipment of the parcels. God bless you sir claude

So, it is obvious that sister Dave will notice this new lie, because of course the company PLog sent to the church all the materials related to the parcel (so, including those pictures that the idiot sent to Claude). Laughing

===

Anna & Cats... some funny lines:

Wednesday evening
Cats: Honey I have made deal with people to use their land but they refused and no one believed me, that said you guys are not real and called you guys scammers so right now am stranded

Thursday morning
Anna: Then try harder
Cats: Nobody here in Nigeria wants to help me and nobody in UK wants to help then i can't do anything

Thursday evening
Anna:So you don't want to marry me?
Thanks
Noted
Cats: I want to marry u
I swear i really want to build this monument of faith and get married to you but no land to build it, or i have an idea.. why don't you build the monuments of faith for me there then send the photos for me then i will forward the pictures to cardinal william&Rev.paul then we get married immediately
Anna: Seriously... I'm not doing that
He'll know immediately that it's not in Nigeria
Cats: I met a man named Mr.clement i told him i will be using his land to build the monument of faith(Pyramid ) but he said i will be pay the sum of #500,000naira but he said before i will be allowed to start any construction in his land that I'm going to pay half of the money which is #200,000naira, God knows i have financial problem , i have sent this messages to Dave , rev.paul and cardinal to minus some money from my parish budget money like $556 but when converted to Naira it is approximately #200,160naira in our currency (i just sent them this message tonight to sister Dave) i pray they should grant me my requests
Anna: I'm glad you found someone to help you. You see that with determination you'll accomplish a lot

Posted: Fri Aug 02, 2019 12:17 am

Quote:

his name is NOT Clement... not at all.

NAIL HIS HEAD TO THE FLOOR!

http://www.montypython.net/scripts/piranha.php

Posted: Fri Aug 02, 2019 3:09 am

I think that the church's insurance should reimburse Reverend OC for his stolen phone. Its only fair as he was doing God's work. He will only have to send the police report dated within two weeks of the theft. It could be problematic.

Lad wrote:

Quote:

The problem & reason why i have not been replying your messages regularly or daily all this while is because my phone was stolen last month 18th August, i was robbed when coming back from the preaching the gospel at night by 10:00pm , i told cardinal william about my stolen phone.

Posted: Fri Aug 02, 2019 4:52 am

I’m also slightly curious as to how his phone was stolen last month in August on a date that hasn’t happened yet this year. If he means last year, I’m surprised he hasn’t mentioned this before.

Posted: Fri Aug 02, 2019 7:01 am

In July 23 he wrote to the cardinal:

Quote:

Dear cardinal william adam there is a very big problem here. I'm sorry I didn't sent you the daily photos as we discussed I was robbed by unknown gunmen yesterday night on my back from preaching the gospel they took my phone, I thank God they didn't hurt me but right now am in a cafe chatting with you with a laptop but not a phone because it was stolen yesterday but that won't stop us from building the monument of faith.

As I was saying yesterday, I won't be using cements and blocks to build the monument of faith but instead I will use sack bags to build the monument of faith and use wooden bench as bench of admiration. Me and my apostles are going to compete the monument of faith by Thursday tomorrow or Friday so by Thursday or Friday will shall send you our compete monument of faiths .
Be blessed Cardinal William adam

So this is "the sad event" that he refers to. Laughing

Unfortunately for him, the two pictures he sent to PLog (pictures that represented the father's friend, the one who could take the parcel instead of Cats) arrived at sister Dave. Laughing

- This was his message for Claude, in July 22:

Quote:

Anyway i just got my dad's trusted friend picture from his facebook..This is photos below. He doesn't have a ID but only a driver license ID i sent it to you previously.

- He probably thought those pictures would remain "secret," so he now sent (to sister Dave, Father Paul and Cardinal Adam) other pictures of the same man (his oga, maybe?) claiming that this was a certain Mr. Clement who would be willing to sell a plot of land, necessary for the construction of the pyramid. Laughing

Of course, sister Dave will notice these new and repeated lies and react as such. Twisted Evil

I'm going on my vacation today, so the story will continue when Linoline returns from her vacation.
===

Friday 06.05 - Sister Dave to our little lying idiot:

Quote:

Dear brother Obi***,

I give you a new chance every time to stop lying and start being honest. I don't understand why you keep throwing our trust away and keep lying.

I know that the man which you presented is no stranger and his name is not mister Clement, because we received so the identification documents from mister Claude after you've sent them to us and the man is your father's friend. His name is . Are you ignorant or just stupid that you think you can keep lying to me? I am highly disappointed with you right now.

I will give you another chance to finish the tasks given to you without excuses, but I don't want to hear more lies from you.

I can not give you money from your parish's money because it is in the parcel, in the secured warehouse of PLog and it will leave they only to be shipped to you or to be recalled definitively when you keep refusing to finish your task.

Be blessed
Dave Wilson

Cats to sister Dave... he's full of angry and frustrations. Laughing

Quote:

Yes his name is also Mr. Clement that's what everybody knew him here with. You know i have financial problems still yet u guys don't want to render help to me. I have tried my best and i can't steal from anybody because of building of monument of faith. I really want to build the monument of faith but since u don't want to minus some money from my parish budget money and send to me to start the building of the monument i want you to go back to where you bought the parcels and return it to the seller to where you bought them and keep your $25,000 to yourself i don't need it anymore.. i don't think you guys want to really branch out to Nigeria and build your project but i assure you with 100% that you will never see a trusted and devoted Christian like me ever in Nigeria to replace me. My eyes have opened and i have heard stories of you guys before using people to work for you still yet you guys won't send them any parcels or money, i have faith in you guys but you people has made me lost faith You guys are fake and i can never be tricked by some immortal beings. Bye forever.
Chibu***

===

09.08 - Sister Dave wrote to the little moron:

Quote:

Dear brother Obi***,

There's a difference between not wanting and not being able to. The money that is for your parish is in the parcel that is in the PLog warehouse. Cardinal Adam ordered to keep it there and I'm not authorised to change this decision, so I hope you understand that my hands are tied and at this moment there's nothing else I can do about the parcel.

I have forgiven many lies from you all because of sister Anna. I wish for her to be happy and I thought that is what you wanted as well. I know that this task of building the monument is not a small one, but it is the final one and if we can present at the end of this month results to Cardinal Adam then I'm sure the rest of the procedures will be swift and our delegation, together with sister Anna will come to you before the end of September to celebrate your wedding.

Be blessed
Dave Wilson

===

11.40 - It seems that our idiot understood (or someone made him understand) something. Laughing

Quote:

The only way i can believe you guys are real and not fake because to me now you people look fake including Anna.First of all i asked Anna to send me her pictures, make me a video, and also i tried calling her with video call but she refused that a sign of someone being fake and also i don't believe Eater church really exist because it is not on google and also on google map because all churches on UK are registered online and and being found on google(Only fake people hide their identities ).

I also asked cardinal william to send me his pictures but till now i haven't seen any of his pictures and his giving me excuses about it (proof of fakeness). I also asked you for your pictures sister Dave but you refused that means you are also fake, all of you people of eater church are fake.

The only way i can believe you guys are real and not fake is by sending me your pictures , cardinal william pic, Rev.paul greeham pic, Rev sosuoma pic, zambia reveren pic, eater church pic and locations and also some event video celebrated by eater church but if u can't upload it here you can upload it on youtube and send me the link here and also the monument of faith (pyramid ) pictures buillt by UK Reverens not Africa reveren i don't want to hear any excuses. I don't want with fake people or ghosts, if you refuse to send me this just forget me and block me.

11.50 - Sister Dave:

Quote:

Dear brother Obi***,

You said that you have no apostles to help you, which means you are not starting a new parish. To me it looks like you are the one that has been lying to us all this time and I don't have to prove anything to you. I am not authorized now to send pictures of people that are not present here and you asking me for mine is inappropriate and it's not in my job description to send those to you. I have no there interest in you than strictly church related. It has been explained to you already why the eater church can't be found online and I'm not going to rehash that conversation. If you want to act like a silly little liar and then blame others for being a liar that just is a show of immaturity.

Nobody asked for my opinion but to be honest, I think you're just using sister Anna and or church for your own gain. You're using sister Anna's feelings for you and act like a little boy. In my opinion you are not worthy to be even considered as a reverend.

You have a choice. You ether do what you have to do to start this parish in Nigeria and receive the support money and the parcel at the beginning of September as soon as the pilgrimage are over or you do nothing and I will personally make sure that sister Anna will hear about all your lies.

Be blessed
Dave Wilson

===

Thursday evening
Cats: I just pray they should send me the $556 dollar or pounds or whatever currency u guys are using
Anna: yes me too
Cats: If they refuse I don't have any other hope.

Friday morning
Anna: You have one month, that's enough time right
Cats: Stop telling me this bulshit
Why don't you go build it yourself , you thought it easy..nonsense

End of the afternoon
Anna: I never said it's easy. I just want to be together and I don't want to wait longer than necessary
Don't you understand that? They'll send you the parcel and support money after you have finished it and we can get married
Cats: I told you i have financial problems don't you understand simple english
Anna: io no comprende
Cats: what's that
Anna: a joke
Cats: I don't speak German
Anna: it's Spanish
Cats:I speak English and French only
Do you speak French
Anna: un petit peux
Cats: I understand french petit
Anna: tres bien
Cats: It okay , it enough
Let talk serious business
Anna: ok
Cats: The church refuse to grant me my request
Anna: why?
Cats: She said Cardinal william is not around and said she's not authorised to send anything
I remembered a promise u made to me before
Anna: tell me
Cats: You said if the church or cardinal refuses to help me financially that u will assist me
Anna: but they are helping
They are sending 25.000
Cats: Let them said it first ,
Anna: I have no influence on that
Cats: You know the building of monument is not possible
Anna: I know you tried
Cats: Let me be plain to you, I'm not going to build that monument of faith
Anna: And you know I can't marry you without permission from the church
Cats: If that is the case so be it, i can't kill myself ...i have tried my possible best
I pray that another nice man like me will marry u
Anna: <shocked emoji>
Cats: don't blame me because it not my fault
Anna: Not mine either
Cats: Cardinal william is going to forbid us from getting married because nothing gonna make me build that monument of faith if i don't get a sponsor
Anna: Did you try to get a sponsor there?
Cats: no
Anna: why not?
Cats: I tried my best no body is willingly to sponsor me and my whole disciples has left because they believe all this are fake and you guys are not sending anything , (they called u guys illuminatis
Anna: Oh god, I will never involve myself with Illuminati
Cats: Thanks for understanding , God will give you another good husband
Anna: Please don't leave me, you promised to marry me and have a family together
Cats: Cardinal william won't allow us to get married
Anna: is there really no other solution I beg you please explain it to them explain the situation. Oh god I can't believe this
<Voicemessages from Anna>
Cats: Who should i explain to?
Anna: The church of course
Or people who can help you
Cats: I have explained heaven and earth to the church but they are not willingly to hear me out
Anna: so you're leaving me
Your just giving up on our love
Cats: The people here don't want hear my story, they are all fed up with my stories they don't want to listen to me anymore
Anna: what do you want?
Cats: Look honey to God who made i want to marry you, if i don't want to marry you i wouldn't have filled the premarital forms or send you my introductory video and passed the first, second stages of being a reveren but this last stage involves money but i don't have any money with me
Anna: Are you serious that you want to marry me?
Cats: I swear with my life i want to marry you, if i don't marry you let God stop me from breathing
Anna: I'll contact Davina myself and see what is possible. I don't just want to give up
Cats: Davina will discourage you and make it worst (she calls me a lair and she don't believe anything i say anymore)
Anna: i know you are not
I love you and I want to marry you
Cats: I'm crying right now
Anna: why
Cats: Am too intoxicated by you
Anna: <kiss emoji>
Cats: Thanks my wifey (wife)
Anna: my husband
<Anna changed the nickname to Emma's husband>
Cats: What do you want to do now, do you want help me out 😔
Anna: I'm going to contact Dave and see what's possible
But first I'm going to make breakfast
Cats: So it morning in USA now
Anna: 9:04 am
Cats: wow
When are you coming back to UK
Anna: love you honey
Next week

Posted: Mon Aug 12, 2019 9:31 am

First of all a big thanks to Birlic for posting everything in my absence!

Friday August 2
Cats: Baby i love you too
Baby why didn't you come to Nigeria to spend your vacation
Came**
Anna: I told you. This was already booked months ago and I couldn't get a refund
Cats: Wait you booked flight to Nigeria before
??
Sorry, now i understood what you are saying
Did you contact Dave?

Sat AUG 3 7:20
Anna: The flight to USA was booked months ago. Since I didn't get approval from reverend Greenham yet I didn't book a fight to Nigeria yet.
I sent her an email
8:22
Cats: What did Dave said?

13:12 Cats to Sister Dave

Quote:

Pls sister Dave pls send me the pictures of cardinal william and Rev.paul greenham's pictures. (Please Dave)

15:45 Sister Dave to Cats

Quote:

Brother Cats

Thank you for asking me so politely. As I told you before, I'm not allowed by law to send the pictures of reverend Greenham or cardinal Adama without their consent. It's written in the GDPR laws, you can easily find those yourself.

Be blessed
Sister Dave

18:41 Cats to Sister Dave

Quote:

I know sister Dave that it is in the law . But cardinal william and Rev.paul won't know about it, let it be a secret between us...pls i want to see the men of God am working with, you guys have seen mine

19:32 Sister Dave to Cats

Quote:

Dear Brother Cats

I'm truly sorry but I can't send them to you right now. When they return from their pilgrimage they have to decide for themselves if they are ok with sending their pictures. Technically, until they return you are working with me, so for this one time I will honor your request and send you my picture. I can not risk my job and calling over a few pictures. I hope you will understand that.

Be blessed
Sister Dave

20:26 Cats to Sister Dave

Quote:

Wow you're beautiful , you almost look like Anna

21:33
Cats: ??????
Anna: I told her we need to talk urgently and she told me to come by as soon as I'm home, shed make time for me
Cats: What if she refused to render help to you
Anna: Hi honey. I missed you
Cats: Really
Anna: Of course
Cats: But i miss u more
Why are u not always active
Anna: I told you the connection is not stable here
and during your daytime it's night here
Cats: Are u using sim card or wifi to chat
Anna: Sim
Cats: Am always online morning to night waiting for you to come online😓
Anna: I'll be home in one week and I'll be online more
Cats: Sometimes i be awake from midnight to 6:00am waiting for you to come online but you don't come online
Anna: Can't help it. I try, but it doesn't always work
Cats: I miss you alot honey 😞
Anna: Me too
Cats: I miss u
I miss u
I miss u
Nobody gonna change my love for u
But Anna am worried, what if Dave refuses to grant you help what are you going to do?
Anna: Be angry with her
Sorry, I keep losing connection
I'm going back to the beach
Cats: Wait
Can't you help without her

SUN AUG 4 7:43
Cats: If Dave doesn't help you what will be your plan B?

MON AUG 5 8:00
Anna: I don't have one yet
Cats: Honey you have to be fast in sending the money to me so that i can start building the monument of faith before cardinal William& Rev.paul comes back from Greece after their pilgrimage so that we can be together forever
15:30
Anna: What money? I never promised to send you money
I bought you a Rolex
And you said you weren't going to build the monument
So what are you talking about

TUE AUG 6 9:09
Cats: What are you talking about Anna?, i thought you said you want to contact Dave for possible solutions?
I thought maybe u want to borrow money from Dave or use your own money and send to me to start building the monument of faith to avoid cardinal forbidding our marriage
Make me a picture of yourself in the plane when coming back to Liverpool
TUE 15:39 (he contacted bware's character, tried to make a move and asked her for money)
Anna: Why the fuck are you making a move on my friend?
Cats: I want to be a friend to people you are close but since u don't want me to b her friend then i will stop talking to her
Anna: I don't want you to hit on my friend
Cats: Ok i won't, make me a picture in d plane when arriving back frm to uk
Anna: I'm not going home yet
Cats: Just make me a pic in d plane when coming back anytime
Anna: Ok
Cats: so what discussion u and dave wants to talk about?
Anna: I've explained to her that you really can't make the monument
And urged her to find another solution.
Cats: What solution does she have ?
Anna: I don't know, she told me she'd look into it but didn't respond me yet
Cats: What if she said there is no solution ?
Anna: You expect me to know everything. I'm not God
Cats: So you are not going to do anything about it if she said there is no other solutions ? 😒
Anna: I need their permission to marry you. I told you that from the start
Cats: What if they refuse to permit us if i didn't build d pyramids
20:45
Anna: I don't know
22:14
Cats: I thought you're working why can't u send me little money to build the monument of faiths or borrow from Dave
Anna: That's not the point. Why would I do that if i don't even know we'll get married
Cats: If u send me money to build the monument of faith, cardinal approves our marriage we get married hav children and live a happy life what else do you want?
Anna: If I send money and one of your untrustworthy apostles takes it then you can't build the monument, and we won't get permission anyway
And you keep forgetting about the Rolex like it means nothing
Cats: Dear i really appreciate your Rolex i luv it (i can only receive the Rolex when approves the parcel to be sent to me )but am really concerned about our marriage, Am the one receiving the money in my account not my apostle
Anna: And still you said a few days ago you weren't going to build the monument
Cats: I promise with my life that if i receive the money i will start the building of the monument of faith and send you daily pictures of the work
Anna: I recall you swearing that you wouldn't build it at all
Cats: Am swearing with a holy bible that if i don't build the monument of faith after u send me money let me die instantly , u know holy bible has power
Baby why are saying all this, don't u trust me anymore 😢
Anna: Of course I do. But you wanted me to talk to Dave and now you want something else again
You confuse me. Lets wait what she has to say first
Cats: Cardinal william and Dave are birds of the same feathers, she only receive order from the carinal (she has nothing to offer you). She will only tell you that there is no solution and say that the only solution is for me finishing the pyramid
The only solution now is for you to help me with some money so i can start building the monument of faith
So before ending of August cardinal will receive the picture and approve our marriage then send me my parcels with the Rolex inside it then i will repay you your money

Wednesday Aug 7 11:49 Sister Dave to Cats and Anna

Quote:

Dear brother Cats

Sister Anna explained your situation to me, about the money issues and your apostles refusing to help you with building the monument. I'm very sorry to hear this and I want to advise you to start gathering new apostles around you for when the new parish well be officially opened. You will need their help and support when you are installed as a reverend.

Because of the seriousness of the situation and sister Anna's urgent request to look for other possibilities for you to finish the initiation process of becoming a reverend, and receive the support parcel for your parish, I have been reading all the protocols for the last few days. We have never before met a situation where a new reverend wasn't able to build the monument of faith with the help of his apostles, so it's a very exceptional situation.

However, the protocols do describe the procedure for when a reverend can't finish the monument of faith and there is an alternative talk to fulfill. And I am convinced that in your situation this will be the perfect solution.

In case a reverend can't finish the monument of faith the alternate task is a spiritual task. You will have to write 15 original psalms of minimum 12 verses each, that you have thought of all by yourself, inspired by the Holy Spirit, applicable to different situations you can expect to experience in life.. you are not allowed to copy psalms from the Bible, it has to be your own words. You will have to submit these psalms handwritten. Imagine you are king David, in his many struggles and victories in life he always turned to the Lord for praise, worship, thanksgiving and help. Think of different situations you want to describe and make your palms so that they will give praise to the Lord and show your wisdom and inspiration.

I believe that you will be able to fulfill this task. It doesn't require the help from your apostles and it didn't cost money. You will have almost 4 weeks left to finish these and reverend Greenham and Cardinal Adam will be pleasantly surprised when they return to see the results of your work. The parcel will be released again and we can start planning our visit to Nigeria and your marriage to sister Anna.

I'm glad that this situation could be resolved. Please remember to gather new and trustworthy apostles around you before the official opening of the parish.

Be blessed
Sister Dave

17:38 Cats to Sister Dave

Quote:

Dear sister Dave,
So sister Dave if i write down the I5 original psalms of minimum 12verses each i will be sent the parcels and budget money immediately?, so no need of building the monument of faith again?.
I want to ask a question are you giving me full 100% assurance that Cardinal william and Rev.paul will accept my 15 original psalms of minimum 12verses each and won't ask me to do another task?

WED AUG 7 15:45
Anna: Good morning dear
17:10
Cats: Gud afternoon luv💖
Anna: Hi honey
Cats: Wow , thank God you are online
Anna: How are you
Cats: Not fine
Anna: Why? What's wrong?
Cats: You haven't gave me your answers about yesterday we chatted
Anna: What was the question
Cats: Check our previous chats
Check the chat you texted me before you said good morning to me
Anna: You said that there would be no solution. Didn't your read Daves message yet?
Cats: Yes
So aren't u helping out without Dave
Anna: I explained if I can't marry you why would I send money? I already sent a Rolex and now Dave find a solution and you don't need money to finish the process
Cats: What solution did Dave brought ?
Anna: Read your email
Cats: Don't go offline yet
Wait let me check it
If you want to go offline pls alert me
Anna: My network is still bad here and I want to make breakfast soon
I can't wait for your response forever. I'm hungry
Cats: I'm back
I don't think that solution sister Dave brought is okay for me
18:41
Anna: Fine
So you don't want us to get married
Would've been nice if you said that a few months ago
Cats: Why are you saying all this , i want to Marry you
Anna: No you don't
Cats: Just say you don't want to send me money to build the monument of faith instead of giving me all this irrelevant excuses
Anna: You don't even need to build the monument of faith anymore
And you'll receive that parcel when you finish that final task that Dave explained
And as far as I know, there's also money inside it. Lots of it
Cats: My dear, Dave just said that , remember it is not Cardinal william or Rev.paul who said it.. it is not yet approved by them yet so don't put all your hope now in Dave she's just a ordinary secretary
Anna: One who is doing this work for years now, so I trust her
Cats: Ask her whether it is approved by cardinal william and Rev.paul for me to carry out the new task , i don't think they will accept this new task
I don't think she'd even say this if it wasn't allowed
Anna: But it looks like you are only looking for excuses and that makes me believe you don't want us to get married
I'm not going to let you ruin my day
Bye
Cats: So you don't love me anymore 😔
Bye too
Anna: I knew you'd say that, but it's not me who's giving excuses or delaying everything
I gave you my heart because I trusted you to keep it safe, not for you to play games with it
Cats: Everything am doing something i always look at the future (consequence) . Dave is just a secretary not a reveren nor a cardinal, she don't have the authority to give new task
And besides am not playing with your heart instead you're the one playing with mine
Anna: Thanks
Cats: Thanks for what? 🙄🙄
Anna: Being an asshole
Cats: Really, thanks for that
And i still love you

THU AUG 8 9:19
Cats changed the chat colors.

11:52 Sister Dave to Cats and Anna

Quote:

Dear brother Cats,

I wouldn't have sent you that message yesterday if I wasn't completely sure of it. It's described in the protocols that all church leaders follow, so I can assure you that if you fulfill this task, you won't have to build the monument of faith anymore and you'll receive the courtesy parcel for your parish.

Be blessed
Sister Dave

15:54
<thumbsup>
21:32
Cats: What is wrong honey
Anna: I'm tired of fighting
Cats: We are not fighting honey
Or are we?
Anna: We were yesterday and you made me unhappy
Cats: I'm sorry hun
Forgive me honey
Anna: So now what?
Cats: I just wanna tell you i.love.you.so.much
Anna: I love you too but you hurt me every time and I'm tired of that
Cats: Am sorry honey it won't happen again
I dreamt about you last night
I couldn't get u off my head
Anna: What was the dream
Cats: Your picture of your face all over my dream, am drunk in love with you honey
Anna: Will we ever be together?
Cats: Yes of course
Do u.believe that?
I believe 100%
Anna: I don't know. It all depends on you
Cats: I'm gonna fucking marry you honey and why are you doubting
Are you a doubting Thomas
Anna: You are the one that doesn't want to do what's necessary, so how can I have faith
Cats: Am gonna fucking do it
But i have a problem
Anna: What's the problem this time
Cats: Someone else is reading our chat 😔
Anna: Who
Cats: A friend of mine.. am sad
He only reads my chats but he doesn't chat with anyone with my account
Anna: Who, how and why
Cats: I use his phone to come online because i don't have a phone anymore
Then log out when you give it back. I don't want anyone to read our private conversations
If i log out now i won't be chatting with you again and right now
Anna: Then I'll just go back to the beach
But make sure you log out when you give him his phone back
I don't want that same issue when you're brother used your phone and I had to keep guessing who I was talking to
Cats: I need a new phone to be active always to chat with you and the church
Anna: Then buy one from the money they'll send when you get the parcel
Cats: Don't you get..if i don't have a Phone right now of my own i can't be chatting with you and i won't be able to contact the church without a phone
Anna: looks like you didn't have a problem with that up until now
Cats: Pls lend me 100$ or 200$, i will re-pay you back when i receive the parcel, pls help your husband in need
You.know my.phone was stolen before
Anna: I know and you know what I told you
Cats: I have not been chatting with Dave for longtime now
Anna: she sent us both an email today and it looks like you responded to her message yesterday
Cats: Just tell me that you don't want to help me instead of always giving me excuses
Anna: I'm not giving you excuses, I'm telling you the same thing everytime. It just seems like you like to lie to me

FRI AUG 9 7:53
Cats: So you took all this my begging as a lie 😭
Am so disappointed in you.. Any time I need your help the most u always turn me down with irrelevant excuses
18:32
Anna: Irrelevant? Lies are not irrelevant. You said you haven't been in contact with Dave for a long time while you sent her a message a day before. That is lying
What do you expect from me
Cats: Yeah i used my friend phone to contact her but i removed my account so he won't be reading my conservations again
Anna: You can use gmail in the browser and if you log out afterwards he won't read anything
Dave said yesterday she assures that this task is enough to receive the parcel and you won't have to build the monument
Cats: Can't you see am not always active on facebook as i do before
Anna: No I don't see that
I'm online only once or twice every day because the network sucks here
Cats: When are you coming back this week
?
Anna: This weekend
Cats: Why i need your help the most and you always turn me down why?
Anna: I bought you a Rolex and I'm paying for our wedding all by myself. Why are you not pitching in? Did I ever ask you to pay your part?
Cats: Why are you repeating about Rolex watch, it is just a gift you bought for me
I am asking you for help
Anna: Just a gift....
You're being ungrateful
Can you please send me money to pay for our wedding?
I'm asking you for help because it's expensive and I don't think it's the right thing for a man to have his fiance pay for it all
Cats: So you're insulting me now because am poor 😢
Anna: No
I'm just asking you for help
Cats: Thank you very much
Anna: Why are you giving me excuses
Cats: Thanks for all the insults
I asked for your help you always insult me but if i ask another girl for help you will always say i should stop talking to them but you don't to help me
Why are you like this honey?
Just tell me that you're not Generous
Anna: Wow
Thanks for the insult
Cats: Who?
Anna: You
Cats: $100 is just #36,000naira here, i want to buy a infinix 6X is just 36,000 naira pls hun 😪
Anna: Any idea how much a wedding costs?
Cats: Okay borrow me 100$ or 200$ when i receive the parcel money i will repay you back, deal?
Anna: You don't need money for the task you have to do
Cats: I don't need money for the task dear, i just money to buy a good phone, i am phone-less my friend is going to collect his phone soon
Anna: Ok. Have a good evening then and thank your friend for letting you use his phone
Cats: Wait
Why are you scared to send money to your husband
Anna: I'm not
Cats: You're just scared , you are scared because you believe after you send the money to me that i won't marry you anymore
I know that what you are thinking

SAT AUG 10 0:53
Cats: Help me out Anna my love 😔
8:19
Anna: Sure

SUN AUG 11 5:01
Cats: Really thanks sweetheart, I know u are a Generous Christian, am crying right now 😭
Should i drop my account number
22:35
Anna: Missed you too dear
Cats: Me too honey
Re you back at Liverpool
Anna: I just came home
Cats: Today?
Anna: And I'm exhausted from the trip
Yes just a few minutes ago
Cats: Wow
Welcome back honey 😘
Anna: Thank you
Cats: Should I give u a massage
Anna: Oh yes please
Cats: Lie down honey
Wear your towel
Be naked please, remove your 👙
Anna: Good plan because I need a shower 🚿
Cats: Do you want the massage before shower or after shower?
Anna: Any time but you're not here ☹️
Cats: It remaining just Month honey and I will be with you pls be patient for me
Anna: I will
Did you start working on that assignment?
Cats: Not yet honey am just waiting for you
Anna: I can't do that assignment for you
Cats: No dear, I didn't tell u to do it for me
Anna: Ok, then you shouldn't waste time and start working on it
I'm going to shower and sleep.
Goodnight
Cats: After shower will you come back online?
Anna: No. I'm going to sleep. Work tomorrow
Cats: I really to chat with u
I have missed u alot
U have to stay with me

Posted: Mon Aug 12, 2019 3:42 pm

Oh yes, let him "drop" his account number...oink oink here piggy piggy Twisted Evil

this lad may be young but he's just as despicable as the best of them. That fake IV pic used to "prove" his hynia, malaria, hypertension, ALS, MS, and hysterical pregnancy is a bona-fide Eater classic IMO. Yet he's just another jackass lad that says that love shouldn't come with conditions while placing the condition to send him money for the same said love. Turn the screws even tighter on this novice please. He needs dicipline! That monument of faith of his was an abomination. Was he inspired by a landfill or maybe Hamburger Hill? Jesus wept because of things like this and it must not be tolerated!

Posted: Mon Aug 12, 2019 7:08 pm

He's tired of doing things or doing nothing but getting assignments without getting money for it. He's aiming for quick cash from Anna now, but she's not budging.
Notice how a week ago he said he's constantly online but hardly sees Anna (on her vacation, with the bad connection) and a few days later he's almost never online because he uses his friend's phone, because his was stolen (a month ago).
Today he first says he's working on the assignment. Only 2 hours later he said he has it all finished. Impossible in such short time I'd say. He's lying so much that he can't keep up with his own story.

7:07 AM
Anna: Ahw honey, I missed you a lot too
2:18 PM
Cats: Anna my love
Anna: hi
Cats: Lol..really ?
Just hi 🤨
Anna: good afternoon my dear husband
more better?
Cats: Yes,perfect 😩
Why didn't u said that earlier ?
Anna: good question
Cats: So?
.....
Anna: ....
Cats: And Anna why are mimicking me? 😒
Anna: Am I not allowed to play?
Cats: No, you re not allowed to play for now, i need a phone 😡
Anna: too bad, I don't have one
Aren't you supposed to be working on that project for the church, so we can get married in September?
Cats: I will work on it if i receive a phone from and forward my work to Dave
You**
Anna: you don't need a phone to write
Cats: I need a phone to snap my work to Dave and paul Greenham i don't want to friend to read my chat
Anna: Then you have to make sure you log off every time. You can use his phone to send the work and log off afterwards
It's very easy.
Cats: No, his travelling to Uniben university to write his postume exams in benin..he will not be around
Anna: I told you that I have sent you a rolex already I am not going to keep sending money if it's not even sure we're going to get married
Cats: Why do u believe that we are not going to get married, Do u have another man?
Anna: Because you don't seem to want to do what's needed for us to get married
you keep bringing excuses
Cats: Did u see my dp?
I will do that i assure you that
Anna: dp?
Cats: Profile pictures
I wrote your.name on it
To show how much i really love u
Anna: That's so nice, I didn't see it yet
Cats: <frowning emoji>
Anna: What's wrong? My phone doesn't automatically update the profile pictures (true, messenger lite lags in this on my phone. I was on my laptop, but he didn't need to know that. I saw it long time ago but I'm careful of what I post because Anna's other fiancee's might not appreciate Anna having more potential husbands.
Cats: Give me phone and buy a new one
Anna: Stop being so fucking ungrateful and do what you have to do so we can get married
Cats: Haha
Am not ungrateful honey
Anna: If you've done that I'll buy you a new phone before our wedding
Cats: And stop shouting at me and stop the use of this word "fucking "
Anna: I'm not shouting. and ok, there will be no fucking in our marriage. I didn't thought you'd want a life of celibacy
Cats: Am not a Gay
The word fucking looks rude
Anna: looks like you're fond of using it yourself
why do you feel the need to say you're not gay
Cats: Lol
I am straight
Anna: are you sure?
Cats: I am a Gay
Anna: oh my god
Is that why you refused to do anything?
Cats: <laughing emoji's>
So you took my joke so serious ?
Anna: I wasn't allowed jokes anymore. Works both ways mister gay
Cats: I am bisexual..lol
I fuck both male and female 😅
Anna: oh god... gross
I'm going to rething this marriage
Cats: <laughing emoji's>
Is like my joke is too expensive
Stop making me laugh honey
Look am not a Gay or a bisexual am just kidding
5:06 PM
Anna: Well there must be some sort of problem why you refuse to do what you need for us to get married
Impotency
Guess that's it then
Cats: Lol.. am not impotent
I have already done the work it is just a new phone i need from u like 100$
6:54 PM
Anna: I don't believe you
Cats: I swear
But i have not sent it to temh
Them*
Anna: because you didn't do anything
Cats: How
Anna: I don't know how you manage to do nothing
Cats: I have told you what i need to tell u, believe it or not i have done my assignment ,
It is remaining your turn
Anna: My turn for what exactly? I didn't get an assignment
Cats: Did u see your name in my profile picture ?
Anna: Yes I've seen it
Cats: So how did u feel about it?
Anna: It's wonderful
Cats: And u didn't care to react on the dp
Anna: I told you that I love it didn't I
What's your problem today?
Cats: Lol
I didn't see your likes on my profile picture
Go like it
Anna: I told you long ago about my ex, that he keeps watching me. If he finds out I'm in a relationship again he'll come bother me again. I don't want that because he's too strong for me
Understand?
Cats: How is he too strong?
Anna: It happened before, when he thought I was dating someone that he waited for me when I was going home one night, when it was dark and he threatened me
physically strong
Don't you understand? I'm scared of him. When you are here it's different, you can handle him
Cats: I can't handle anybody am not strong
Anna: <sad emoji>
Cats: Lol
Am just kidding
I am strong like superman💪🏻
Anna: <laughing emoji>
Cats: Really
Anna: what?
Cats: Babe what's wrong with you
Why are delaying me
Anna: I'm not delaying anything honey
Cats: You **
I know u sent me a Rolex i love it but Rolex can't make us get married if i don't have phone, after u send me 100$ i will use it to buy a new phone and forward the work to Davina then they will send me the budget money i will repay you back from the budget money, why are you scared to help me 😢
Anna: I'm not scared to help you. I told you already. I'm not sending you money until our marriage is approved
And only you can make sure it will be
Cats: It will be approved only if i send the pictures to them nothing else
What's don't u understand anymore
Anna: Then you have to make sure you'll send them the pictures
I understand it perfectly only you don't want to accept my answer
Cats: I hav already done the assignment..see am done fighting you can keep your money and your Rolex to your ex, i am fed up with all this stories, my prayer for you now is that your ex-husband should come back to you (i already made you a music in the studio with your name in it, i wanted to send you it to you after you send me 100$ but you're not serious) i give up..i don't want to be a Reveren of comedenti church anymore..extend my greetings to Cardinal william, paul grayham and Davina..Bye Emma, (Take heart).
Anna: Seriously?
Then fuck off!
Cats: Ok
Anna: Or should I say fuck ass
Cats: <thumbsup>

Hello I'm New here! Joined: 13 Aug 2019 Posts: 1

This is the greatest thread I've ever read on here, so great that I had to register and tell you Laughing

I hope he has a change of heart, I don't want to see Cats and Anna going their separate ways Crying or Very sad

Posted: Tue Aug 13, 2019 6:49 pm

RoxyJ, Thanks for the compliment. If you like this thread, then you should definitely read this one. It's similar, but with a way more stupid lad and and enormous amount of trophies.
And please visit greatest hits, because there are way better baits published there

Posted: Thu Aug 15, 2019 8:43 am

Tuesday August 13
He couldn't stay away for long... still hooked, but frustrated
9:58
Cats: You have to delete my picture from your timeline (caption: My Love)
Anna: stop hurting me
Cats: How?
You caused it don't blame me 😒
This is my account number:
<reported>
I will be waiting for credit alerts
12:38
Anna: That's not your name
And I caused nothing
Cats: Babe it is my other names
Don't u see ob**** my surname
Jude is not your name
Your names are chi**** obi***
Cats: Jude is my other name not my surname
Anna: With an r, not an h
Cats: See babe obi*** and ob**** still means the same thing, my dad told me that
Anna: Doesn't matter what it means. It's different
When are you going to send the materials to Dave?
Cats: Today i immediately i receive the money and get the phone
Anna: Didn't I tell you that I'd give you a phone as soon as our marriage is approved?
Cats: Which phone will i use to forward the work to Dave?
Anna: The one you're using now to chat with me
Cats: My friend phone not mine
I need my own personal phone and i want him to stop reading our chat
Anna: Shit
Cats: You see the problem
Anna: Who is this now?
Cats: And i don't like it
I want to be together
Anna: Who?
Cats: I don't want anybody to be looking our chat
Anna: Who is talking to me
Cats: It me Cats
Anna: No
Cats: Why no
Anna: Last time I thought I was talking to Cats and he acted like this it was Dogs

Anna: Hi honey
Cats: So do u believe it me now na
Anna: You're acting strange. Like your brother
Cats: Hey baby
Yeah i am angry with u Anna
Anna: Same here Cats
Cats: You always give excuses
Anna: No
I tell you the same thing always
Cats: I need a phone honey, my friends are all mocking me (the way he says that he makes it look like that's a problem)
Please help me
Why are u acting this way
Anna: Then send the work to Dave
Cats: His going to read the chat and he may change the parcels address to his own and put his own account number
I don't want to use his phone
Send me 100$ please
Why don't you want to help me your husband
Anna: He might have been the one sending me the account number with the funny name and it gets sent to him instead of you
Cats: That why i need money from you and get a new phone and stop using his phone he maybe using it to hurt u
Think about it
Anna: I've thought about it and I told you I will send you one when it marriage is approved
You want an iPhone or Samsung or something else
Cats: Then it won't be possibe for me to send my work to Dave since you're refusing to send me the money
I cant use his phone to send my work to Dave, don't u understand
Anna: Then I can't send you any because you refused to do what you need for us to get married
Cats: Our marriage is 100% approved already when i send my work to Dave
Anna: Did you send it to her already?
Cats: Not yet, i haven't gotten a phone yet to use it to send to her
Anna: Looks like you're holding one that is capable of making pictures
Cats: Which one?
Anna: The one you're using now Einstein
Cats: It not mine dear, it my friend phone the one his using to hurt you
I need my own personal phone to send my work to Dave, i won't repeat myself again
Anna: He's using it to hurt me?
When did he do that?
Cats: Are you sending or not? Because i want to give him his phone right now
Anna: Make sure to log off and don't give him your password honey
Cats: ain't u sending me 😥
What phone will i use to send my work to Dave
Anna: This one you're using now
Cats: It his own, he will use it as an advantage to send his account number to Dave don't you understand simple English or do you understand Swahili?
Anna: I understand both to be honest
Cats: So what's your point then
Anna: You were the one trying to make a point
Cats: I have 24hours now to send my work to Dave today, if it reaches 24hours i can't be able to send my work to Davina anymore.. Are you sending or not?
Anna: I'll take my chances
Cats: Really
Today right
What are you going to do right now honey?
Anna: Have some coffee I think
Cats: ain't u sending it today
???
Anna: My coffee? Don't be silly
Cats: ain't u sending me the 100$ to buy a phone and send my work to Dave?
Anna: I told you I'd take my chances. Now if you excuse me, I have some work to do
Cats: I don't understand the word i will take my chances
Are you sending it or not..yes or no?
?????????
Please explain that word i will take my chances, i don't really understood that word pls explain it to me
Late in the evening, cats wanted to play a game that will bite him in the ass, because he will need to send identification opictures again now.
Cats: Good evening honey
Anna: My wife Obi*** Anna
Good evening
Cats: Why were you snubbing my message before
Anna: Who is this
Cats: Why do you ask, so u scared to know who is this but u don't want to buy phone for him, stingy wife 😒
Anna: Fuck off
Cats: Haha me?
Anna: Leave me alone
Cats: Who ?
Anna: Cats's stupid friend
Cats: It doesn't matter at all
Why don't you want to help your husband to buy a phone and he loves you so much
He made the whole world know that you're his wife still you don't love and care for him
Anna: I don't want to talk to you
Cats: Talk to my ass then frog face
Go get your true love (Cats) and stop making feel bad and crying all day
Him***
I mean go get your true love a phone and stop making him feel bad and crying all day because of you
Anna: You can kiss my ass
You know what? You buy Cats a phone and I'll pay you back with 50% interest in September
Cats: If you truely love him as you said send him 50$ or 100$ so he could a phone because if you don't send him the phone i will change the parcels address and change the budget money to my bank account and he won't Marry you anymore😈😈, so think well bitch before it is too late
Anna: Ok
Cats: Bitch
Asshole motherfucker
Anna: Oh my god. You really are just a perverted frustrated little gay boy
Cats: I hate English bitch they are too stingy, i just love USA girls they are very Generous , and am suspecting that you're fake and i will convince Henry not to marry because i hate seeing him cry because of you bitch
Stingy bitch
Anna: Psycho
I can't believe my Cats has a friend like you
Cats: Stingy animal
Buy Cats him a phone yourself by sending him 100$
Am not going to allow Cats use my phone to send his work to eater secretary then marriage won't be approved ..the earlier the better, if you truely love Henry send him 100$ to buy his own phone and stop using my own phone to chat with a lowlife bitch like you ..be fast before it is too late, don't say i didn't warned you
Am outta of here, am done chatting with a white local dog like you ...prostitute !!!!!!!!

Wednesday, August 14 12:25
Cats: What the fuck that just happened here Anna? 😱😱
14:33
Anna: Some asshole used Cats's password
Seems to be pretty clear
22:55
Cats: You see what i have been telling you all this while
Anna: who?
Cats: Cats
Anna: I don't believe it
Cats: This is the problem i have been avoiding but u refused to help me
Anna: help who?
Cats: It me Cats not my friend
Anna: How am I supposed to know
Cats: If it my friend he will be insulting you
Anna: I will not talk if I'm not sure who I'm talking to
Cats: How?
Anna: Ok. Not Cats
Cats: What do u want?
Anna: Cats would know to send me a picture to prove it's him
Cats: It dark here
Anna: Goodnight fuckface
I'm only chatting with Cats
Cats: It fucking dark here

Anna: Ah you could send a picture
Hi honey
Cats: Hi wife
Anna: This stress would've all been solved if you had sent your work to Dave
You're being unnecessarily difficult
Cats: don't blame me
I don't have a phone
And you refused to buy me a phone
Anna: You can make pictures with this one
Cats: It not possible
Anna: So do that, send Dave your work and I'll get you a phone
Ok. You don't want to be a man
You want to be a little boy that's too lazy to make a few pictures
Cats: He won't allow me use his phone thank you
Anna: You're using it now and don't tell me he doesn't allow you to make pictures because you did it just now and you did it yesterday
You just don't want to and I don't understand why but if you don't want to marry me just say it
Cats: If you say so
Anna: I don't want to repeat myself anymore
Cats: Take it or leave it, his not allowing me to use it and his beside me right now watching me
Anna: Ok. Suit yourself
Those 24 hours you mentioned are over and hell didn't break loose yet
Cats: If you really want to buy me a phone you would have done that since but you are not going to buy me anything i know you very well you're just too stingy and after u will be calling yourself a good Christian
Anna: I bought you a Rolex and if you only want to marry me if I pay you then you're acting like a hooker. I could as well go to husbands-r-us and pick one
Cats: You are not paying me and am not a hooker, i just asked u for help so i could get a phone simple as ABC
Anna: And I have explained to you that I'm not sending money as long as our marriage is not approved and you are acting like a cheap hooker and I don't want to marry one
Simple as ABC. What of my explanation do you not understand
Cats: Our marriage is already approved if i send my work but only with my own personal phone, i don't want anyone to change my parcel address and budget money bank account number, do you understand me now sister Emma?
Anna: Our marriage will be approved, but you can't do that. You can only do what you need to to make sure it will be by reverend Greenham and Cardinal Adam
Cats: Do you understand me now?
It done already i just need a phone to forward it to them sister reveren Anna
Anna: It's good that you finished it already. Now you only need to find a way to get it to them. After the approval I'm going to give you a phone
Cats: With which phone ?
Anna: Goodnight Cats. I'm tired of this discussion. I keep telling you the same thing over and over and if you still don't understand you should blame your elementary school teacher that forgot to teach you reading
Iphone, Samsung, any kind you like
Cats: Send me 100$ to buy it here and use it to send my work, if you refuse Goodnight to you then.
Anna: Goodnight. You cant even read simple English and that's what you need for using a phone
Cats: Thanks for the compliment goodnight sister Anna
Anna: If you're getting a samsung or a iphone is too expensive and it cost 1k dollars which is approximately 360,000 naira, i just want 100$ which is 36,000 naira I'm not a Greedy person

Thursday August 15
Anna: I don't mind. I want to give you the best

Posted: Fri Aug 16, 2019 9:50 am

Thursday 16:04
Cats: Then give it to me now honey, i don't like sharing phone
Anna: who is this?

Wait.... you're in the exact same place as Tuesday
Cats's friend made this
Cats: What's wrong with you , it me
Anna: And you're wearing the same shirt as Tuesday. That's gross
Cats: If i don't want to talk to me just tell me so that i will go offline i don't want to argue
Anna: I only want to talk to Cats
Cats: It me Cats what is ur problem this afternoon
Since you don't believe it me then am going offline
Anna: My problem is that Cats is sending almost the same picture as tuesday, so this must be made earlier so I am not sure this is Henry
[colo=black]Later
[/color]Cats: Okay
Hi honey
Anna: Hi
Cats: Where did you go?
Anna: who are you?
Cats: Where is the picture i asked u to make me in the plane
??m
Anna: Who is this?
Cats: It me Cats
Anna: prove it

Anna: hi honey
<picture inside a plane>
Cats: Nah,
I mean u
Show me yourself and stop being fake
Anna: You asked me to make a picture for you on the plane
And I did
Cats: I said make me a picture of yourself in the plane
Anna: Well you did but I didn't agree to that
Cats: Stop lieing and giving me irrelevant excuses, i said make me a picture of yourself ..stop being fake
you are making me believe that u really fake
Anna: <screenshots of the chat asking him to make a picture inside the plane>
You asked to make a picture in the plane and I did that
Cats: I said of yourself can't you read simple English
Anna: Look very well
That was your first question. I never agreed to that
After that you asked me the same question twice and I did exactly that
Can't you read simple English or do you have some kind of mental problem that makes it hard for you to understand what people are telling you
later
Cats: You just like giving irrelevant excuses
Anna: Did you send your work to Dave
Cats: I can't use someone phone to send the work it is private
Anna: So are or conversations but you can't be bothered by that
You just don't want us to get married. I'll just tell Dave that tomorrow, at least she knows what's going on then
Cats: I really love and i want to marry you my love
You*
I really want to marry u
Anna: It doesn't show
Cats: Why do say that?
I am protecting something that won't affect the both of us in future my love
Anna: Your just being stubborn
Cats: No am not stubborn honey
My friend promise me that if i use his phone to forward my work to dave his going to change the parcels address and bank account number and i won't be able to receive them and we won't be approved
Anna: Ok. I'll tell Dave to not under any circumstances change the address and account numbers even if it looks like you're requesting it
Problem solved
Cats: don't tell her anything yet
Anna: Of course I will. It will solve everything
Cats: My dad friend gave me a Samsung galaxy phone this evening but the touch pad is faulty, i just need 30dollars from you to fix it please honey
Anna: Is our marriage approved yet?

Anna: Oh honey that doesn't look good at all. Shouldn't have dropped it
Cats: I don't have any other phone honey, i need money to fix it
I'm tired of borrowing phone from my selfish friend
Anna: No honey, what you do need is some clippers to cut those nails
Cats: I love the nails honey
I luv keeping long nails
Anna: Only gays have them that long
So they can reach each others prostate well 🤮
Cats: I have reasons for keeping them , i use it for scratching and soldering things
Anna: Sure. Keep telling yourself that
Your refusal to do what you need to marry me tells me something else entirely
Cats: Why are you loosing faith in me
Anna: You make me
Cats: If i don't want to marry you at first i wouldn't have done the 1st and 2nd stages and premarital form
Anna: With your strange behaviour, avoidance of our marriage, the gay nails
Cats: My dad keep nails too, nails doesn't make someone a Gay
Anna: Does your mother know?
I believe it's genetically transferred
Cats: Yes and she's happy with it
Anna: Oh god
Cats: I'm not happy with marrying a gay
Many Nigerians love keeping nails and we don't practice gay in our country, i have never seen a Gay in our country before
Anna: That you don't see them doesn't mean they aren't there
Cats: We don't have any
We are blessed country
Anna: Keep telling yourself that honey but I'm not marrying a gay
Goodnight
Cats: I will cut it if that what you want
Anna: It would make you look less gay
Cats: Okay honey
Honey do u love me
Anna: Of course I do. You know that
Cats: Pls help me with 30dollars so i could fix my phone please
You snub my message because of little help am asking from u

Friday August 16
[/color]Anna: Look at the time... I was sleeping. And you keep asking me the same question And I gave you the same answer a thousand times. It's not going to change. Our marriage is not approved yet, I will not send anything until it is
Cats: Why do u believe it won't be approved ?
Anna: That's not what I believe but things should be in the right order
Like I told you. First the approval, then I'll send you more

Posted: Fri Aug 16, 2019 11:00 am

This kid is the most annoying broken record ever. I really hope you manage to safari this little weasel. Might take a while as he doesn't seem to even have a pot to piss in.

Posted: Fri Aug 16, 2019 12:14 pm

Quote:

I'm tired of borrowing phone from my selfish friend

Baiting Guru Joined: 25 Jul 2017 Posts: 2107

That "selfish friend" line jumped out at me too. If he is loaning you something it doesn't sound selfish to me. Oh well.....

Posted: Fri Aug 16, 2019 1:00 pm

I'm corrupted.... it didn't even register when he wrote that, but maybe that's because I wanted to insult him for being gay Laughing

Posted: Fri Aug 16, 2019 9:05 pm

He got the point... he has to start writing Laughing

Cats: can't you help me before approval
Anna: who?
Cats: Me
Anna: show me
Cats: If i show you will you help me?
Anna: if you show me I will talk to you

Anna: hi honey
Cats: Am not fine
Anna: Me either
Cats: Sorry
I really need ur help honey
Anna: But it's good to see you put on a clean shirt today
Yes, I need your help as well
Cats: What help?
Anna: You need to go to a tailor and have your sizes taken for your tuxedo, so I can order it for you
Cats: I don't want a shirt i have enough shirt
Anna: tuxedo silly, I'm talking about a tuxedo for our wedding day
Cats: Am not silly
I don't want a tuxedo now
Lend me some money to fix my phone first
Anna: Well, I want you to wear one for our wedding and I'm going to order one tomorrow so I need to know your sizes and you have to go to a tailor to have them taken or the tuxedo will not fit you right
Cats: Give me the money i can sew it here
Anna: No. There's an amazing tailor here in the city and I want him to make it
Cats: What about money for fixing my phone?
Anna: What about you sending your work to Dave. I sent her a message that she can't under any circumstance change your address or account number and she promised she won't because that would have to be approved by reverend Grahyam anyway
You can keep repeating the same thing every time dear, but that doesn't change a thing, so do you want to keep stalling or do you want us to move forward and prepare for our wedding?
Cats: I can wear anything i want for our wedding, you don't have to choose wears for me
Anna: ok big boy, do you prefer a clown suit?
Cats: Whatever
Anna: A wedding doesn't plan itself honey, I need to know what you want
And if you don't want a tuxedo, then whatever isn't a good answer
Cats: I need to fix my faulty phone first
Anna: ok
Cats: Ok
My problem doesn't mean anything to you, you take me for guaranteed
Anna: hmm
you don't really seem to care about my problem
Cats: You don't have any problem at all
Anna: See, you don't even care
Cats: I need 20$ or 30$ to fix my phone before i can use it to send my work to Dave don't you get, you don't even care about that
Anna: You are only talking to me because you want money from me, well guess what, if I wanted a whore I'd go and order one
I told you I would send it to you when our marriage is approved
but you don't want to listen
Cats: I know you want to send me money after our marriage is been approved i understand that, but i don't need any other money from you if you only send me 30$ to fix my phone and send my work to Dave it is really delaying my work
Anna: no you are
Cats: How am i delaying?
Anna: by not sending your work to Dave
And don't give me that crap about not wanting to use your friend's phone for it, that issue is solved
Cats: My friend won't allow me to use his phone don't u get?
Anna: YOU ARE USING IT
ITS JUST A SILLY EXCUSE
Cats: His watching me
Anna: so what
I don't have a problem with that
Cats: He doesn't want me to use Gmail
If i try using Gmail he will collect it from my hand
I need to go now, he need his phone back
Anna: Ok, bye

Cats to Sister Dave

Quote:

Dear Dave, am i getting it wrong or right? Because i don't want to start afresh ..and please alert me when cardinal william and Rev.paul returns from the pilgrimage .

Dave to Cats

Quote:

Dear brother Cats,

Although it is very wonderful that you are re-writing existing Psalms, the task is that you think of new Psalms. Of course they will not be added to the Holy book, but it is a spiritual task to prepare you to do the work of the Lord and they can be used in your new parish for worship and thanksgiving services. Think of different situations one can encounter in life and use that as an inspiration to write your own Psalms.
I'm happy to see that you take this calling seriously and I want to wish you many blessings while working on this task.

Be blessed,
Sister Dave

Cats to Sister Dave

Quote:

Okay.. what day is cardinal William and Rev.paul coming back from the pilgrimage in this month August?

later
Cats: Lol
Anna: what's so funny?
Cats: The "bye"
<screenshot of Dave's initial mail with his new task>
Explain that to my understanding, break it down easily so i can understand that
later
Anna: You need to write 15 psalms of minimum 12 verses each and you can't copy them but have to make them up yourself. Like songwriting in the Biblical way

Posted: Fri Aug 16, 2019 10:45 pm

Such an insufferable little twat this one is. A $10k windfall is right around the corner and he bleets and blathers on and on over $20-30 bucks? He's a Lagos lad surely. Time for him to become a man by visiting far off lands. Sadly, I don't think he's capable for anything too far off and exotic. Maybe that voodo/witchcraft market in Togo will broaden his horizons. Hopefully you can safari him long enough to grow out those stupid eyebrows. If he is unwilling to cross a border then ship his ungrateful ass to Kano. They love effeminate twinks from the south up there. He'll make plenty of friends Laughing

Elite Baiter Joined: 28 Mar 2015 Posts: 1916

This young lad may only be nineteen, but he's already an intolerable, obnoxious little shit. He deserves to get his grubby little mitts well and truly burned and maybe he'll want to keep them out of the scamming business in the future.

Grrrr
😠

Baiting Guru Joined: 25 Jul 2017 Posts: 2107

Quote:

15 psalms of minimum 12 verses each

You are diabolically evil....

Posted: Sat Aug 17, 2019 7:45 pm

^^^ Thanks for the compliment. If I had room I'd put that in my sig-line, just like my mentor's nice words Laughing

No time to update now, but it looks like he got his lazy ass working. I'm looking forward to see if his results will be real or fake this time.

Posted: Sat Aug 17, 2019 8:59 pm

If you need help clearing up space, the Signature Icon Conservation Fund (run by yours truly) will be happy to help out. I kid, of course (but am I really?). Quick math tells me that’s 180 verses at the minimum, so I’m excited to see if you get all of them as promised.

Posted: Sun Aug 18, 2019 6:48 pm

^^^Wanna trade a yin/yang for a golden pith or a goat maybe? Laughing

Just kidding of course. You earned them and I'm fond of my collection.

FRI 22:52
Cats: Santa maria 😱😱
Anna: huh?
Cats: Can u make it for me honey 🥰
Anna: Of course not
Cats: Really
Why honey
Anna: Because it is your task. Not mine. I can never be a reverend
But hey, you said you were already done with all the work
Cats: I don't want to be one before i was been threatened by your so called cardinal of eater church
Anna: Not true
You were asked and you agreed. They would never force someone to do that
Cats: Who told you it not true, i told cardinal william that i don't want to be a Reveren he said he will forbid me and you from getting married if i refuse to be a Reveren of eater so i obeyed him so that i can marry the love of my life but she doesn't care for my needs 😔
Anna: That's because you already promised him to start a parish in NIgeria. Of course he's angry if you wouldn't fulfil your promises
But why did you say you finished the work while you didnt
Cats: I sent my work to sister Dave but she said it a existing psalm from the bible and she asked me to start afresh and that is not going to happen because am planning to give up
Anna: so you don't want to marry me
Cats: Yeah
Anna: Goodbye Cats
Cats: Lol, why goodbye?
I'm just pulling your legs Anna 🤣🤣
Why are you snubbing me now, can't i tease my wife anymore?

Saturday 7:06 Sister Dave to Cats

Quote:

Dear brother Cats,

Unfortunately I can not tell you the exact day that they will be returning. It will be in the first days of September, maybe the final days of August. It's a sacred pilgrimage they are on and that can't be rushed. I will let you know as soon as I hear from them when they will be coming back.

Be blessed
Sister Dave

SAT 9:16
Cats: Good morning my sugarcane
Anna: You don't want to marry me, why would I talk to you
Cats: Who said that
Anna: You
Cats: I was only kidding and teasing you yesterday i wasn't serious about it
You know i can't live without u
SAT 14:15
Anna: Do I?

16:05 Cats to Sister Dave

Quote:

Pls Dave pls gimme an example for that original psalm or is it like this e.g ps 23 vs 1 titled "The lord is my Sherpard" so i can forged anything i want in it without copying from d bible...please gimme your own example am still confused

16:48 Sister Dave to Cats

Quote:

Dear brother Cats,

There's no need to be confused about this, but unfortunately I can not give you any examples. I told you before that you are the first reverend that is unable to finish the monument and due to your circumstances another procedure will be used to finalize your initiation process, but you are the first one to walk that path, so be proud of yourself and show wat great work a eater reverend can do.
You can not copy psalms of the Bible. You will have to write them yourself. You think of the words and the sentences, it should be your original work. Sister Anna told me that you are a singer so I expect this not to be difficult for you. You don't have to write the melody or music, but if you feel inspired you are of course allowed to do so and send us also your own performance of your own psalms.
If you have any other questions, don't hesitate to ask.

Be blessed,
Sister Dave

SAT 17:34
Cats: Anna am gonna go to the tailor next week saturday for my measurement so i will send my size and width of myself to you next week Saturday because from today to next week Friday i will be busy writing and forging my own psalms ..Thank you
Do you have any question to ask?

19:43 Cats to sister Dave

Quote:

Dave you know that psalms in the bible ends at 150 so should i forge my own numbers starting from 151?

20:19 Sister Dave to Cats

Quote:

Dear brother Cats,

Yes you can start numbering at 151 if you prefer, but since it's not an addition to the Bible, but the start of your own book of Psalms you can as well start counting at 1. Either way would be good.

Be blessed
Sister Dave

SAT 20:40
Anna: What would that be?
SAT 22:38
Cats: I Don't know, just let me know if you have any questions to ask
Baby i just forged or form my own personal psalms but is just 3 but it is not up to 15 yet..please honey just help me write some psalms of your own so i can add it to my own psalms, i don't what to write next.. i know it not your business or assignment but just help me out, husband and wife work together so things can work out well.
Anna: The only question I have is why you have been so cruel to me
Cats: I'm so so so sorry for being cruel to you honey..forgive me
..I love you so much and am gonna marry you and nothing is going to change that

Sunday 1:56 Cats to sister Dave

Quote:

Thank you for the clarification. I will also like to add additional goods to the parcel in LITH pogistics warehouse and you have to remove the money from the goods you taped it with because i have gotten a valid bank account to receive it, i know u you don't have the authority to do it now but that will be when Cardinal william and Rev.paul returns from the pilgrimage.

Sun 8:16
Anna: Then stop saying things like that because you really hurt me with that
9:30
Cats: Okay my sugar plum
Happy Sunday my sugarcane

14:25 Sister Dave to Cats

Quote:

Dear brother Cats,

I don't know what kind of goods you want to add to the parcel but I can't make any decisions on that right now, as you know. Please understand. It's in a secured warehouse right now and I couldn't even reach it if I wanted to.
When you are working on your assignment, please keep sending the work you have finished already, so I can start cataloguing it and the whole process will be faster when Cardinal Adam and Reverend Greenham return from their sacred pilgrimage.

Be blessed,
Sister Dave

16:32
Cats: My sugar pls answer me na

<Cats sings for Anna>

17:57 PM
Anna: Wow
Cats: I'm speechless
19:38
Cats: You love it honey?
Anna: I'm stunned

Posted: Sun Aug 18, 2019 9:12 pm

Do you want the lizard? My menagerie is somehow still growing, given the penguin that wandered into my signature, so at some point I may run out of space. All the lad quotes take up a lot of space, and “save the animals” and all of that. Strangely enough, the carebear trend has missed me.

Back to the bait at hand, why does he need example of psalms? It isn’t like you’re asking for anything obscure, at least now. Everything still sounds promising, so hopefully he won’t balk at the task once he realizes how long writing 180 psalms will take. If he’s efficient, it will only take a few hours, but if his penmanship is poor he’ll have to redo them.

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