Another New "Goofy Crap your Pets Wrote" Thread

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419Eater is my life Joined: 27 Jan 2015 Posts: 331

From an initial script:

Quote:

It may interest you to know that the said fraudster will be sued to court for perpetuated act of fraud, forgery and impersonation. I will put your name in a suit case against him and stand in as your attorney.

Posted: Tue Apr 17, 2018 1:26 pm

Mal has shown his distrusts, and the Lad's outburst won't help:

Quote:

i have been honest to you but you refused not to understood !!!

Posted: Wed May 02, 2018 6:38 pm

From the document Lad:

Quote:

we are able to get it done either with the connects or sophisticated hacking systems

Posted: Tue Jul 10, 2018 12:33 pm

From a trunk lad:

Quote:

Your details has been provided to the United Nations Diplomat hence he shall be contacting you as soon as he arrives hopefully late Wednesday or early Thursday for directives how to receive Trunks at your doorstep. Please keep this project to yourself alone bearing in mind that nobody had any idea about its contents other than you as my partner and confidant. As for my coming back, my leave starts late December though as the camp commandant advised, things may be changed depending on the new President if he authorizes leaving or staying for additional years hence we shall see his reaction on those of us serving in abroad.

He claims to be in the US Army and to have found the trunks in Iraq. There won't be a new US President for another two years unless Trump dies. There was an election in Iraq a few months ago, but as far as I know, the new Parliament hasn't yet elected the President, and what does the Iraqi President have to do with when a US soldier goes on leave?

Posted: Tue Jul 10, 2018 2:07 pm

There are some odd bankers these days, that's for damn sure. Hearken to David Allen Borders of the UN's Compensation Grant Unit for some inspired nomenclature about online banking:

Quote:

Anywhere at all you are so far as you are hooked to the internet through a process call Do It Yourself Syndrome

Meanwhile, another Lad who claims to be Guy Mendelson, the "General Managert" of the ANZ Bank (a real person, BTW) has some good news:

Quote:

The full document my bank requested from you has been received in my office now. I am going to have a general meeting with all the bank bored members and trustee about this your 85 Million USD fund and the account, We will also verify all this legal documents you send to me now if the are authentic and also issued from the real source. I will get back to you in the next Two to Three hours from now after our meeting and the verification of those documents to tell you the out come and what we discoursed.

This 85 Million fund has been deposited and abandon here in ANZ Bank of Australia since 2003 by Mr. Charles Taylor. So is not what only me can handle, I have to contact all the bank bored members and bored of trustees about this your proposal for my bank to change this said account to your own.

Posted: Tue Aug 07, 2018 9:57 am

Hearken to highlights from the latest offering in Captain Mal's inbox:

Quote:

I AM HUNTING IN FOREST 3 DAY AGO WHEN I SAW A SHOPPER LANDED ON THE GROUND IN CORNER OF THE FOREST

Quote:

I SAW A GROUP OF MEN COMING DOWN FROM IT SO I WENT INTO HIDING,I SAW THEM CARRYING TWO BOX WHICH THEY CAME TO HIDE IN FOREST WHEN THEY LEFT. I TRACED IT THROUGH THE HELP OF THEIR FOOT STEPS OF THEIR SHOES.

Quote:

THIS IS NOT THE FIRST THING I HAVE SEEN IN THE FOREST I HAVE FOUND SESMOGRAPHY CABLES, SACK OF GUNS, GOLD AND DIAMOND ETC .

Quote:

I MANAGE TO SEND YOU THIS MESSAGE THROUGH THE HELP OF MY DAUGHTER WHO IS IN THE COLLAGE.

Posted: Tue Aug 07, 2018 4:40 pm

Quote:

Since the funds did not go through, i will suggest you work into the bank and do it directly instead of sending it online.

Master Baiter Joined: 09 Dec 2009 Posts: 117

From the son of a dying woman:

Quote:

i was shocked to see that my Mother is still on Coma and her skin color changed as a death person.

Posted: Fri Aug 24, 2018 9:16 pm

Not mine. Saw it posted on another site today.

Quote:

.TELL HIM NOT TO TELL ANYBODY, IT FOR YOUR EYES ONLY AND PROMISE ME YOU WILL NEVER,EVER REPORT THIS TO CIA,HUMANE SOCIETY AND NCAA.

Posted: Sat Sep 01, 2018 7:03 am

From a script:

Quote:

Poverty Alleviation Program Board.
1-2 Poverty Alleviation Payment Center.
Seoul, New York City United State of America.

Posted: Mon Sep 03, 2018 9:49 pm

Quote:

I want you to know that we the Reserve Bank have been contracted by the UNCOMPENSATED BOARD

I was going to suggest a pay rise for the board, but 10% of nothing is, well...

Posted: Fri Sep 07, 2018 9:01 am

A lad gave me an example of what to write to his lawyer about a next-of-kin case.

Quote:

1) A back Dated Death Certificate
(Which I do not have because he died in a plane crash in Venezuela in the month of August 2005 like I stated above)
2) His last will
(Because his vital documents, which include his last will were with him when he perished in the plane crash and as such non of these were recovered)

1) Why was he carrying his will on a business trip instead of having it stored somewhere safe?
2) How can you send me his will if it was destroyed in the plane crash?

Posted: Sat Sep 08, 2018 7:16 pm

Quote:

you have to stop all other contacts with other lenders because there are many scam athirst right there

Oddly Shakespearean

Posted: Sun Sep 09, 2018 12:12 am

Another case of Lad Geography:

Quote:

The diplomat is ready to take the two boxes to any of this country if you are ready to go to any of this country The countries are.
(1) DUBLIN
(2) DUBAI
(3) LONDON

Posted: Mon Sep 10, 2018 12:37 pm

Quote:

Hello love how are you and hope you are having a wonderful weekend. i miss you so much and wish i could have my hands on your chick right now. I haven't heard from you all day. i hope you are doing great. What's happening with the payments my love. write me the moment you get my message okay? love you so much...

Posted: Thu Sep 20, 2018 4:05 pm

Both from the same lad in the same message:

Quote:

my friend go to the bank around you pick a
deposit slip fill in
your name and the name that I give to you ask the bank to send TT
transfer to the name and account giving to you so that you can send
me the scam copy of the payment slip for reference purpose.

Last line of the piggy:

Quote:

HOUSTON, TEXAS 10K

Also, he's given me two piggies with no SWIFT code; first he said "ONLY ROUNTING NUMBER", and now he says "Domestic transfer within AMERICA TO AMERICA." I haven't told him where I am. The ASEM mentioned an amount in dollars, but they could just as easily be Australian dollars.

Posted: Tue Sep 25, 2018 10:01 am

She gave me an account in New York with an account number and a Swift code. I asked what's the routing number.

Janet Yellen Yellen wrote:

Thanks for your mail. Its a Business account and the Routine number will not be needed. Do make the payment this morning so we can get this resolved today.

Posted: Tue Sep 25, 2018 12:06 pm

You are a lunatic!

Posted: Fri Sep 28, 2018 8:04 am

Richard Howard wrote:

Thank you as soon as the money reflect in the account i will let you know In devours to your email do note it is well understood and this time i will personally see to it that your property is being delivered successfully,please do provide your personal information as required below,

Posted: Sat Sep 29, 2018 1:34 am

An oldie but a goodie from Godwin Emefiele at the Central Bank of Nigeria:

Quote:

I will not want to make any mistake in Releasing this Funds to anyone except you whom is the Recognized Bonfire Beneficiary to this Funds.

We should give him a pass though, Cammy is hot!

Posted: Mon Oct 08, 2018 10:47 am

Quote:

Finally I am giving you barely assurance in the name of God that you will not require another fee, I am waiting payment information ASAP.

Posted: Sun Oct 14, 2018 10:32 am

The opening paragraphs of an opening script:

Quote:

ATTENTION:MR PARKE,

NEXT OF KIN CONFIRMED

I ACKNOWLEDGED THE RECEIPT OF YOUR LETTER AND THE INFORMATION ENCLOSED TOO WERE WELL NOTED AND UNDERSTOOD.

PRIOR TO THIS EFFECT THE BOARD OF DIRECTORS AND MANAGEMENT STAFFS OF OUR DEAR HONORABLE BANK HELD A MEETING

TODAY WEDNESDAY - 29TH OF JANUARY 2014 ON THIS MATTER TO DELIBERATE UPON THE RECEIPT OF YOUR APPLICATION LETTER

FOR THE RELEASE OF THE FUND WHICH CAME TO US AS A MATTER OF SURPRISE.

AFTER AN OFFICIAL AND PROFESSIONAL CERTIFICATION AND VERIFICATION OF YOUR DETAILS,WE ARE NOW CONVINCED THAT YOU

ARE THE REAL BENEFICIARY OF THE SUM OF $17 MILLIONS UNITED STATES DOLLARS (TEN MILLIONS UNITED STATES DOLLARS)

DEPOSITED BY MR/MRS DAVIDSON

Posted: Mon Oct 15, 2018 11:44 am

And a strange Lad address:

Receiver Name, Fred Machi
Country: Benin Republic
State:Oueme
City: Portonovo
Amount: $100
TextQ: When
Answer: Today
Address; 305 glenridge CP. Nashville, Benin 37221

Posted: Sun Oct 21, 2018 6:15 am

On several fake shipping sites with the same template:

Quote:

Fast And Reliable
Always Deliver on Time
Simple Order Tracking System
Real Time Updates
Desecrate Sniping
Low Cost But Efficient
Reliable And Rapid
24/7 Support Team

Posted: Fri Oct 26, 2018 2:09 am

Quote:

Hello dear look through the well the Swift code is there
...
Routing Number: 541120106
Swift Code: 026009593

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