Musa..... Adventures of a moron.. Safari #4

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Elite Baiter Joined: 28 Mar 2015 Posts: 1916

^LOL, yes, the rather obscure 4th Hadith by the little-known, but highly venerated Imam Al Haji Mustafa Goe should do nicely. Twisted Evil

Posted: Sun Jul 22, 2018 4:05 pm

Heisenberg, thanks for the offer, that would be great, I have no knowledge of that at all, so it might be helpful. I gave him a lot of demands for the baptism, so when I let go of a few and make it easier, those arguments will hopefully persuade him to do it.

Posted: Mon Jul 23, 2018 3:03 am

Well you can possibly start by saying that Chapter 2, Verse 138 says that Allah gives us all a thing called "SIBGAH" in Arabic...its a difficult word to translate, but some people say it can be translated as baptism.

You can say that renowned scholar Zia Ul Rehman Mughal subscribes to this view, which is actually correct.

Worth a shot.

Posted: Wed Aug 22, 2018 12:20 pm

Thought I posted a new update here last week, but apparently something went wrong and it's lost somewhere. I'm not really in the mood to do the transcript again, so a short update.

We're still talking in circles. He wants Emma to come to Gambia for the wedding, go to Holland for the wedding... anything to get out from doing the baptism.
Heisenberg, I'm very sorry, my friend who gave me this advice is not a real muslim (Musa's words).
My pastor even dropped a lot of demands for the baptism, made it a lot easier for him, but he still can't do it. He must be really afraid. At one point Emma threatened to call off the whole thing. He also doesn't want that, but he doesn't come up with other solutions.
So the big question is now...... what can we make this moron do instead of a baptism to finalize the membership of the church. Ideas anybody, please? Because I can't think of anything at the moment.

Posted: Fri Aug 24, 2018 3:44 pm

Emma: I heard back from my pastor. Since you have so much trouble with doing the baptism, he decided that you can start with a form of community service instead of the baptism to complete your membership
Musa: I don't understand what you mean
Emma: Pastor says that instead of the baptism you can do good deeds to show your commitment and you won't get in trouble with the muslims
Musa: Like what baby
I want you to explain to me briefly so that I can understand very well
Emma: I needed to ask you first if you are willing to cooperate before we can work out the details
Musa: Yes am really ready to cooperate Now that's very good news lad Laughing

Emma: Ok, I'm very happy to hear that. I'll let my pastor know and we'll have to wait for his answer then.
Musa: I am ready for it but am so much in a hurry

So let's have him waiting a few extra days then right? Laughing

Ready to cooperate..... I was thinking that it would be a nice idea that he has to buy a big basket full of candy, dress up like a clown or something and pass out the candy to kids. All of this should be on video preferably.
Kids will be happy, lad will be embarrassed... 2 birds, 1 stone.

Any other nice suggestions?

Posted: Sun Aug 26, 2018 8:24 pm

After a few more days of wasting his time... trying for a trophy with my username for a change.

Musa: Baby I am fine and you are silent today
Emma: I have told you what I was doing honey
Once you are here you will join me
Musa: OK
I miss you so much
Emma: I really want to be with you by now
Musa: Really baby my is always on that
Emma: My pastor just gave me a message with the task you should do as community service
and I think this will be very easy for you
Musa: What is that baby
Emma: you should get a big basket full of candy. and 30 balloons in different colors. You will have to wear a red hat with a yellow flower on it and a white shirt with the words:

LINO
LINE

written on it in big red letters in the front and back.
Then you go to a place where there are a lot of kids and you pass out the candy and balloons to them
Musa: OK my baby
After doing that, what next
Emma: I think the membership will be completed then (think, but we can always think of more tasks)
Musa: Baby I love you from deep of my heart
Emma: i love you too dear
so you think you can do this?
instead of the baptism?
Musa: I think so that one is not religion
Emma: ok. i'm happy to hear that
oh, and ofcourse, I forgot to say, you have to make a video of you doing this
so the pastor can see it
Musa: I will ask my Muslim community
Emma: good idea
Musa: I am going to ask the Muslim community, whether doing that again Islam or not
Emma:I'm sure it's not. What could possibly be wrong with giving candy to kids?
Musa: I will ask if it is not again Islam, to do it is not a problem
One thing I am thinking of we are from big Muslim celebration. I am out of pocket at the moment
Notting with me
ok

Posted: Wed Aug 29, 2018 7:50 am

Emma: did you talk to the muslims yet?
Musa: Not yet, but I don't think there will be a problem on that
Emma: ok. but you're delaying things again
Musa: I am not delaying , it just that I as I told you this days I am very broken
Emma: did you fall?
Musa: I mean am out of pocket
Emma: is that some sort of new way of saying you're out of the closet?
are you gay?
Musa: No, I am not
I am sorry for using that words there
Emma: I'm starting to doubt it
Musa: Baby were are you at work place
I miss you
Emma: i'm at work
Musa: I miss you so much
Emma: i miss you too
so just go on and do what my pastor asked and we'll be together sooner
Musa: I will
I want you to know that I love you from my heart
Emma: i know that
when will you do it?
Musa: Maybe before the end of weekends
Emma: maybe?
that doesn't really look like you're committed?
Musa: OK now before the end of weekends
Baby have a good day

Posted: Wed Aug 29, 2018 8:12 am

Muhahaha, very good idea with the candy, ballons and all the rest. Very Happy

Posted: Sat Sep 01, 2018 6:40 pm

He did it!!!

Musa passing out candy

But Emma is such a demanding bitch.... and the lad is too stupid to follow a few simple instructions.

Emma: Honey, that is so sweet
But those are not 30 balloons and it's not really very much candy
Musa: Is a full of sweet in side the basket
Emma: You know that this is a big deal. Our pastor agreed to you not doing the baptism, but it looks like you are not taking this seriously

He can do it all over again... He'll love it Twisted Evil

Baiting Guru Joined: 25 Jul 2017 Posts: 2107

Wonderful......although creepy too.

Posted: Sat Sep 01, 2018 9:25 pm

That video is amazing, and he had a T-Shirt made with your character name on it! Laughing

Elite Baiter Joined: 28 Mar 2015 Posts: 1916

Just have to say, those dear little kids do tug at your heart strings. So sweet. It was lovely to see them get sweeties.

See, Linoline, what a nice thing you have done -bet you weren't expecting that. Very Happy

Posted: Sun Sep 02, 2018 5:54 am

Kids are happy and he made a fool of himself. Win-win situation.
And he did the name on his shirt without ever asking why Laughing

Cherry on the pie..... He promised to do it again today.

Posted: Sun Sep 02, 2018 9:14 pm

Musa: Baby I told you my condition of financial
I am trying my best
Emma: Well, right now it looks like you think we are fools by only doing this halfheartedly
Musa: Baby what is the problem on it
Emma: I just told you
Musa: OK baby, I will try and do another one again tomorrow
Emma: ok, thank you
Musa: Baby tell me what needs to be a just
Adjusted
Emma: You need a lot of candy. A big basket full to pass out to a lot of kids. and you need 30 balloons, so I'd think you would need to find at least 30 kids. More balloons and candy are always good and the more kids you give it to, the more it shows of your good character
Musa: I can give it to lot of kids, but not video
I can take lot of pictures and not video
I have only two g in my phone
Emma: video is required
Musa: I even want to send you some pictures but the phone is not allowed me
Emma: ok, then use someone elses phone
video is required
Musa: OK , I will try tomorrow
Emma: Thank you

Today this arrived
Video 1
Video 2

Posted: Tue Sep 04, 2018 8:36 am

Emma was happy with the video's and pictures (there were a lot of pictures with happy kiddies and an idot lad)

Emma: Our pastor said to me that he wants to send you something to help you. He wouldn't tell me what it is, but I think it will be financial support so you can get everything arranged for traveling

Since the sky is the limit, I'd like to try to get this lad to safari somewhere, but I might need some help with that. Anybody wants to join in to arrange a shipment with the 5* courier service?

Posted: Tue Sep 04, 2018 9:02 am

^^^ "Anybody wants to join in to arrange a shipment with the 5* courier service?"

Yeap, sure! Laughing

Tell him that your pastor wants to organize a charity action: The Charity Ball.
- It happens every second Sunday of each month... so, it will be held on September 16th.
- usually, sponsors donate ~ $25-30,000... this money will be sent directly to your idiot. Laughing

- additionally, the parish members donates ~ $10,000 ... with this money buying electronic products (from amazon.com)
- your idiot have to chooses his desired products (Iphones, laptops, photocameras, etc) and then sends the complete list to you.

So, shortly, your idiot has to offer you the following:
- the exact address for the parcel delivery.
- one trustworthy person Laughing

that will receiving the package: name, surname, phone number.
- one bank account to receive $25,000.

After we have all these details, we will claim that the pastor has put in that parcel also the cash money (25,000).
And, obviously, the parcel will get exactly where you want it. Laughing

I can play all the necessary roles for the shipping company and I can "handle" the shipment.

Posted: Tue Sep 04, 2018 9:16 am

Wow! How do you come up with these ideas this quickly? Amazing. I'll go for it. But he is a bit simple, so I hope he understands long stretches of text.

Quote:

I can play all the necessary roles for the shipping company and I can "handle" the shipment.

Yes please
A border crossing would be ideal, because he's relatively close to a border, but since he has no passport, I think that's not an option. Gambia is a big country, so the package might end up on the other side of the country, which is more than 200 miles (I think, have to check) and of course he needs to provide a picture with a recognizable landmark so we can confirm that he is where he says he is now

Posted: Tue Sep 04, 2018 9:34 am

Hmm, your idiot is from Gambia?

- The first time we send the parcel outside the country. Let say: Dakar, in Senegal...
- Then, after some negotiations, we give him the opportunity to move the parcel right in its own country... Of course, on the other side, to make sure that his trip qualifies for safari prize. Laughing

- That's why I have asked the idiot to give us the exact details. To know where he really lives.

Posted: Tue Sep 04, 2018 11:44 am

I hope he takes some of that candy for the border crossing. Lads on safari get hungry.

Posted: Tue Sep 04, 2018 11:46 am

He claimed to live in Brikama when filling out the forms. Koina would be 242 miles, Basse Santa Su is 211 miles.

I gave him the great news earlier, but he didn't read it yet

Posted: Tue Sep 04, 2018 11:54 am

Well,
- Really it does not matter what he said, then, on those old forms.
- Now we will see what is his real address of residence... when we tell him that we have $25,000 for him and another $10,000 (of electronic equipment).

Please, read this topic: https://forum.419eater.com/forum/viewtopic.php?t=294334 to understand the whole "package strategy". Laughing

Posted: Tue Sep 04, 2018 3:58 pm

I know.. lads lie. We'll see soon enough
Pastor Denis... I've followed that story. Very entertaining.

Pork in the evening!

Musa: Oh okay,
I am happy to hear that from you my sweet
Thank you for everything
Have a good day
Emma: I got the details from our church secretary
My pastor told me he wants to organize a charity action for you. The Charity Ball. It's on the second sunday of each month, so that will be september 16th.
Sponsors usually donate $25.000 - 30.000 and this will be sent to you directly.
Parish members donate approximately $10.000 and this can be used to buy electronic products from amazon.com You can choose the products that you want (Iphones, laptop, photocamera, household equipment,...) and send the complete list including prices and links to the products to my emailaddress, so I can give it to the church secretary

So what we will need from you now is
- The exact address where you want the parcel delivered
- One trustworthy person that will receive the package: Name, surname and phonenumber
- One bank account to where you want to receive the $25.000

Musa: Hi
I will send you my bank account number to you in the evening
Emma: Ok, thank you
Don't forget the other information they need to know

Posted: Tue Sep 04, 2018 4:07 pm

- Usually, these idiots prefer to receive ONLY the money, so he will insist on this.
- My usual reply is: "The donation should be seen as a noble gesture, which includes the amount of cash money + the courtesy package... they can not be separated, because this will be regarded as an offense to those who donated".
- Finally, idiots cede and accept the proposed variant. Sometimes they offer a false address and a non-existent contact, hoping to get their money in the bank account before the parcel reaches its destination.
- Well, it's very fun to see what problems are happening right after you simply say: "All the cash money is in the same package along with electronic products... please take good care of this detail." Laughing

Posted: Wed Sep 05, 2018 12:03 pm

Musa: This is my account number <only a number>

Bedroom furniture
Bed
Word rope
Dressing table
Amount is D50 000
Pallor set
Set of suffer D25,000
Centre table D4,000
Flat screen TV D15,000
Mobile Phone D5,000
Laptop D9,000
Photo camera D7,000
Transportation D5,000

My trustworthy name is Dembo <snipped lastname and number>

The link of all these products is at the market
Emma: Honey, I don't think you understood very well what I told you earlier. We need more information from you to be able to send the funds and the right products.
Musa: Ok
Emma: For your bank account, the secretary will need this information to make the transfer:

ACCOUNT HOLDER NAME:
BANK NAME:
ADDRESS:
BANK SWIFT CODE:
ACCOUNT NUMBER:
Code to Reference the bank branch (SORT CODE/ROUTING NUMBER/IBAN/SWIFT):

She needs the full address to where the package will be delivered

The full name of the person that will be receiving the package.

The $10.000 can be used for electronic products from amazon.com (iphones, laptop, photocamera, etc.) You need to provide links to the product pages and a complete list including prices of the products (in $). This lists you will have to send to my email address, so I can forward it to the church secretary.
Musa: OK thanks
Today
Baby I have all details on your email
No you don't. You only gave me the account holders name, not the rest
Musa:
Good morning to you
I send them all to you through your email
And he did. Every line of the bank account information in a separate email Rolling Eyes

(info reported)
Emma: You told me that you will be the one receiving the package, but you need to give the address to where the package has to be delivered. You forgot that
And I see that you have given me this name to receive the package and in your email you say that it will be you. So who is it? "Dembo <snipped lastname>" or you?

Posted: Wed Sep 05, 2018 12:35 pm

^^^ He's a lazy moron, no doubt!

Tell him something like that:

We want to send you a large parcel of electronic products (maximum $10,000) and a sponsorship of $25,000.
We will use a fast shipping company and our church will pay for all transportation and insurance costs. You will just have to take over the parcel.
So, I need you to make a complete list of the products that you need for you. Choose everything from here: https://www.amazon.com/ and give me the exact links of products.
You can choose mobile phones, laptops, video-cameras, printers, school supplies, refrigerators, washing machines, etc ... whatever you needs. The total amount will not exceed $10,000.

Send me all the necessary delivery data:

a) Name and Surname for THE RECEIVER (for the person who will take over the parcel)
- Note that on delivery, he will need to identify himself with a valid ID document (driver license, passport, etc.).

b) Exact address for delivery
- Can be your home address, or any other address.

c) Phone number (for contact)
- If the delivery address can not be correctly identified, then the courier will contact THE RECEIVER and propose a meeting place.

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