Robert: Monument of Faith pg 7

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Posted: Wed Jun 20, 2018 11:04 pm

Roger has been prodding this lad to finish the Leviticus writing. He kept saying that he would have it done within "the next few weeks", but never delivered when he said he would. Finally Roger got fed up with this:

Quote:

I want to believe you when you say that, but you have put me down before. I don't know if I can trust that you will do what you say any more.

And other Church members in my Parish are starting to say nasty things about you beyond my back. I herd that their even starting to call you "Fail Boy" cause you can't even complete simple tasks. That is very embracing for me when they say that!

I need you to proof them wrong and take back your good name. Finish the writing for your Literary Devolution, than finish your membership. That way we will both be respected in the Church again. Can you do that for me?

Meanwhile, the lad told Hilts he was "almost done" when Hilts asked for a progress report:

Quote:

Yes it has been over a month, but i am almost done and will inform you immediately sir.

Hilts didn't care for his vagueness:

Quote:

Almost done with what? Almost done with the current stage of the process? Almost done with the whole church membership? Almost done getting a rimjob from your grandmother? I need fucking details, dude!

Why do you always send the vaguest fucking bullshit responses? I wanna know exactly what your doing to get the church membership. I’ve waited a long fucking while for you to get your shit together and I wanna make sure I’m not waisting my goddam time.

I'm not sure what did it, but something lit a fire under the lad's ass, because today he sent 21 more scanned pages of Leviticus to Roger and Pastor Moses. Twisted Evil

Posted: Thu Jun 21, 2018 12:34 am

OOOOO!

Posted: Thu Jun 21, 2018 4:05 am

Hehehehehe, very well done! Very Happy

Posted: Thu Jun 21, 2018 4:09 pm

It would seem that that rimjob from his grandmother paid off. Shocked

Baiting Guru Joined: 19 Sep 2013 Posts: 2210

He sent the 20+ scans to Moses too. Very Happy

Quote:

Dear Pastor Moses,

I apologize for the delay and i have attached another work from the works am doing and will get the rest send within a week sir please.

Moses is glad to see them and encourages him to keep writing!

Quote:

Hello my son,

Oh this is most glorious news! Many were starting to wonder if you were going to fail at your task. I am so happy to see your wonderful works. I will put these together with your other writings. I am very excited to get the completed writings so that I can share them fully with the Elders.

Pastor Moses

Elite Baiter Joined: 28 Mar 2015 Posts: 1916

Wonderful to hear how hard this lad has been working for you, when he puts his mind to it! He will surely find his church membership well worth the work and the wait. Laughing

Posted: Fri Jun 22, 2018 12:52 pm

I hope, for his sake, he hasn't violated anything in Leviticus.

Elite Baiter Joined: 28 Mar 2015 Posts: 1916

^ And there is so much to violate. Twisted Evil

Baiting Guru Joined: 19 Sep 2013 Posts: 2210

He says he will finish his writings and hopes that he is almost done with his membership.

Quote:

Dear Pastor Moses,

Thanks for your patience sir and i will try my best to complete the work. However, i know after this stage i will be almost through with the membership process.

"Almost" being the important word there. Moses gives him some encouragement...

Quote:

Hello My son,

Oh yes the Elders will be most excited to see your finished work.

You are correct my son, this is most certainly the most time consuming of the stages. One you have completed it fully there are only a few very simple stages and then you will be a full member of our glorious Church! I would say that if you dedicate yourself you could probably have this all done by next week. Of course that depends on your devotion toward the Old Gods. We await your final writings with baited breath.

Pastor Moses

The pastor failed to mention that those "very simple stages" will require him to safari to another country and also built a pyramid out of sandbags... Well get to that later. Very Happy

Baiting Guru Joined: 19 Sep 2013 Posts: 2210

Robert comes through with 26 more scanned pages! Very Happy

Quote:

Dear Pastor Moses,

Here are more works as i promised, i will end the remaining by Monday or Tuesday.

Attached are 26 more pages like this one:

Posted: Sat Jun 30, 2018 7:48 pm

His handwriting is barely legible. How is that acceptable?

Baiting Guru Joined: 19 Sep 2013 Posts: 2210

He finally finished..

Quote:

Dear Pastor Moses, Attached are the last work.

Attached are 27 more pages similar to the one posted above.

I think the Elders will be most pleased with them, and we will move him on to the next stage of membership. Very Happy

Quote:

Hello my son,

Wonderous news! I will show these to the Elders as soon as possible. I am certain that they will be pleased with your works and then you will be able to proceed on with your membership and begin on your next stage. I am truly proud of your dedication my son!

Pastor Moses

Posted: Wed Jul 04, 2018 3:10 am

Robert tells Hilts he hopes that there are no more stages:

Quote:

I have finished the work they gave me and i am waiting for the pastor for next stage. I pray that they should not given me another work but make me a member.

Your friend Roger Bartlett, told me that once i become a member of their church, we will then complete our business. so i am waiting for them now to get back to me.

Too bad, he'll be so disappointed. Very Happy

Baiting Guru Joined: 19 Sep 2013 Posts: 2210

Quote:

Dear Pastor Moses,

Thank you Father for standing by me, i know my membership is closer. i shall wait to hear form you.

I will give him his next stage after the Elders approve his writing in a few days.

Posted: Wed Jul 04, 2018 8:03 pm

Quote:

I pray that they should not given me another work

Has he never read "by their works ye shall know them"?

Baiting Guru Joined: 19 Sep 2013 Posts: 2210

Quote:

Hello my son,

I am very excited to inform you that the Elders have approved your writings! You can passed to your final stage and then you will be a complete and full member of our glorious church. Isn't that wonderful!

I am so happy to instruct you on your final stage; The Monument of Faith.

The Monument of Faith is the most sacred of gatherings places and a location where you and followers from all around your area will come and worship the Old Gods. See the attached photos, these were taken by Brother Archie, a fellow convort in Africa. They beautifully show the size and scale of the Monument.

The construction of the Monument is of the utmost importance. It must be constructed using bags of sand, concrete, or soil. Something that will be solid and permanent. The dimensions are 10 feet x 10 feet x 10 feet. At the top, is a sign labeled COTOG to let all passerby see that it is contacted for the Church of the Old Gods.

In addition to the Monument, you will see that Archie also built what is called the Bench of Admiration. Some of the Elders feel that the Bench may perhaps be even as Holy as the Monument itself because this is where travelers will sit and admire the glorious monument. It should be constructed 10 feet away from the Monument, constructed from brick and concrete. The bench should be large enough to fit 3 followers seated. A concrete path is also required so that followers can approach the bench and kneel before the Monument.

I am very excited for this Final Stage my son! Once you have completed it you will be a full and complete member of our church. Please if you have any questions about the contruction certainly do contact myself or Brother Roger for clarification.

Pastor Moses

I attached several pictures of Archies completed Monument to give him guidance:

.

Posted: Mon Jul 09, 2018 8:18 pm

^^^ Ohh, yeah! I hope he will be delighted and eager to begin building. Laughing

Baiting Guru Joined: 19 Sep 2013 Posts: 2210

It seems like a rather quick and simple project doesn't it? Very Happy

Posted: Tue Jul 10, 2018 2:51 am

Earlier today, Roger asked the lad if Pastor Moses had contacted him:

Quote:

Has Pastor Moses gotten in torch with you yet about your writing? I think I have good news about it! Don't tell anybody I said this, but at Services yesterday I herd some rumors that the Elders were very impressed by your work! They want to move you to the next Stage of the membership precess immediately! Isn't that so exiting?!

I think you are making very good progress on your membership, and I can't wait to see you complete the next Stage, cause I think you will like it.

Robert had not heard yet:

Quote:

Thanks for your email and i am happy that i completed the stage and they are happy. However, I am yet to hear form Pastor Moses concerning the next stage.

Now that he has heard, I am certain he will not like it. Twisted Evil

Posted: Tue Jul 10, 2018 4:41 am

I'm sure the great dirtlands of West Africa could use another glorious pyramid of dirt and wasted lad effort pointing up and praising the Old Gods.

Posted: Wed Jul 11, 2018 3:43 am

Robert is not happy about his new task:

Quote:

Pastor Moses has contacted me and the final task is too much for me to do sir, is there any other way or thing i can do to finalize this than that of Devolution of Faith?

Roger chides him for trying to get out of it:

Quote:

I don’t understand what you mean? How is the Monument of Faith too much for you? Don’t you belief in the Old Gods?

Everybody who has cavorted to the Church has built a Monument of Faith. It’s not too much to do as long as your Faith is strong. Didn’t Pastor Moses showed you pictures of one?

I suspect he will still be resistant.

419Eater is my life Joined: 28 Jun 2013 Posts: 274

Hasn't this guy already gotten one mulligan?

Baiting Guru Joined: 19 Sep 2013 Posts: 2210

Quote:

Dear Pastor Moses,

I know it is final membership requirement sir, but to be frank with you i cannot do this because my family will think otherwise. But if there is any writing in place of this i will appreciate that.

Well at least he's offering to do more writing projects. Very Happy

Still, we are going to be pretty insistent that he does that Monument. It just too funny.

Quote:

Hello my son,

I am not sure I understand? You have not told me about your family, why would they not support you? Have to tried to show them the ways of the Old Gods? Are they interested in joining our church as well? You could have them help you build the Monument of Faith!

Please provide me more information.

Pastor Moses

Posted: Thu Jul 12, 2018 1:51 am

How about if he learns Gothic script and writes the entire Old Testament? It's not a monument, but I'll be damned if that isn't just as impressive.

Posted: Thu Jul 12, 2018 4:12 am

Perhaps the old gods would be satisfied with a hand written and illuminated transcript of both Psalms and Proverbs as a way for him to learn wisdom.

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