Archie Fails to Join the Church of the Old Gods

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Posted: Thu Apr 13, 2017 8:50 pm

I like how the animal faces are all "cartoony"

Posted: Thu Apr 13, 2017 9:35 pm

He has some talent!

Posted: Thu Apr 13, 2017 9:47 pm

Those look pretty good to me. I think we can accept them. I wonder if he actually did them himself, or if he contracted it out to someone else.

No matter. I still want him to do the picture for me, so Pastor Moses should tell him that he will submit his documents to the Elders, but that he should get things right with Roger, his sponsor, before his membership can proceed to the next stage.

Archie sent this to Roger today:

Quote:

Hello Roger, i will do Just as you have said.

Meanwhile, i haven't heard from Pastor Moses since on Sunday that i sent the answer to the completion of the membership form to him.
Please can you help to visit him or call him to know why he has not responded to my Mail since on Sunday?

And also to know what the Elder decision is about my Membership.
Thanks.

I was going to respond tomorrow telling him that Pastor Moses was out of town on a preaching tour and Roger doesn't know the Elders' decision yet, but you can say whatever you want and I'll go along with it.

Elite Baiter Joined: 28 Mar 2015 Posts: 1916

Have these all been drawn by the same person? Two distinctly different styles, at least. The three headed serpent is very detailed and professional indeed. Strange about the cow, as African cattle tend to be very bony and always have horns, I believe. Sooo, I'm wondering where he really got these pics from? What do others think?

Posted: Fri Apr 14, 2017 6:17 am

This is also my opinion... two different styles of drawing.
BUT, all his effort worth it encouraged so I recommend acceptance among proud members of the Church.

Laughing

Master of Master Baiters Joined: 05 Jan 2017 Posts: 790

He looks like Eric from Eric and Franklin

Posted: Fri Apr 14, 2017 5:25 pm

I don't know. The animal drawings lack perspective. Those heads are too small. But I'm just a spectator. Sometimes it's best just to keep the bait moving. I think waiting for the devolution picture should hold things up enough.

Baiting Guru Joined: 19 Sep 2013 Posts: 2210

Hard to say, they looked similar to me, but it wouldn't surprise me if you outsourced some of the work. The self-portrait and the serpent do seem to be better quality than the animals.

I was out of town for a few days, so I just let the lad wait..

Quote:

Hello Pastor Moses, i have not heard from you since the day that i sent the completion of the membership form.

I hope the elders are responding to my answers and that i will get a positive response soon?

Quote:

Hello pastor Moses, i still have not heard from you, its been 5 days now that i sent the answers to membership form. What are the Elders saying about my membership? I hope all is well with you?

Pastor Moses finally gets back to town, and is excited to see that he is finally done.

Quote:

Hello my son!

I am sorry for the slow reply, I have been traveling this week. I went with some of the fellow church members to spread the word at a large nearby city. There are many youths there who have not heard the word of the Old Gods.

I was most exited to see you had completed your Visual Interpretations. It is clear that the Old Gods have truly guided you along your path! Your artistic talents will no doubt be useful to us in the future as you continue forward on this journey. I intend to show them to the Elders at Sunday Services this weekend and recommend to them that we move you onto the next stage. We will form a congregate with the Elders and with your sponsor mentor, Brother Roger.

Have you spoken with Brother Roger lately? He was somewhat upset with you last time we spoke. I do hope that you have fixed things up with him. Remember, he is your sponsor so it is of the utmost impotence that you keep in good graces with him.

When I speak with the Elders i also intend to recommend that we start a social media. I believe the social media will be the media of which we can reach the young people of Africa. We are very lucky to have you as an eager convort! I will recommend that we save some of Dan and Betty's donation aside so that you can help us with that. Once you have completed your membership of course.

I will keep you updated my son.

Pastor Moses

Posted: Sat Apr 15, 2017 2:00 am

I was going to suggest doing a reverse pic lookup to see if the images were snagged from something like deviantart. Buuut, he's already been given the commendation, and maybe the encouragement will lead to more...interactive testaments of devotion later on Wink

Baiting Guru Joined: 19 Sep 2013 Posts: 2210

Quote:

Good day Pastor Moses, i am glad to have you back.
Mr Roger and i have resolved that issue between us. He was actually sad that i didn't submit the form as when due.
We are in good terms now.

Meanwhile Pastor, i will glad to hear a positive response from the Elders of the church after you must have given them my visual interpretation. More also, i never expected that the membership process will be this long.
I believe that with my completion of the first stage, you count and entrust me with the dealings of the church and members. I am one of you now.(not quite me friend)

Dear Pastor, i want the church to show me some level of commitment by the means of instructing Mr Roger to proceed with the business we are doing Or award me with the contract of the social media and website project for the church. I am sure that at this level of my membership process, i should be trusted as every other members of church of the old Gods.

Also, i think that you are in the right position to convince the Elders to use some of the Dan and Betty donation for the social media projects. This will help him bringing more young individuals to the church.
I have been going to public gathering and universities to engage and telling people about the church of the old Gods. They are happy to hear and said that they will be glad to have a temple where they can worship.

Lastly Pastor, i would like to speak to you on phone. can you send me your mobile number?

Moses gives him praise, along with a little slap for trying to conduct business before completing his membership...

Quote:

Good day my son,

I have shown your work to the Elders. They are now deliberating on your submissions, and will make their decision prior to the next full moon at the latest as to whether they will be acceptable as your completed Stage 1 as you move onward to Stage 2. I cannot say for sure, but the Elders seemed most pleased with your works, and I fully expect that they will approve you onward. I am most exited for you my son!

However I am troubled by your recent writing to me my son. While I do understand that you are most exited about becoming a full member of the church, I feel that you are putting the wagon in front of the donkey as they say. The membership process must be completed! Completion of Stage 1 does not grant you status as a full member yet. I cannot advise Roger to do business with someone whom has not complete the membership process yet! This has all been laid out by the Old Gods, as seen by the Elders, and it would be blasphemy to the great and wise Old Gods to give you full member status prior to your completion of the membership process!

I need your clear answer my son. I can tell you, from speaking with the Elders this past Sunday, they are most interested in using your skills to help advance our Church. They are considering ways that large investments can be made in the advances of our social medias. They have also had visions of you advancing our status in Africa. The Old Gods have sent you to us to help with that process.

But you must be committed to your membership son. Are you truly committed?

Pastor Moses

Posted: Tue Apr 18, 2017 3:17 am

On Friday, Roger told Archie he didn't know why Pastor Moses had not responded:

Quote:

Oh, I am so exited! I can't wait to see your devolution picture! I am sure you will be an example and an inspiration to us all! (a cautionary example, and an inspiration to redouble our baiting efforts against these dirtbags)

I don't know why Pastor Moses didn't responded to you. I know he has been out of town on a breaching tour the past week, spreading the Holy Word of the Old Gods. May be he didn't had any time to check his emails while he was doing that. I think he was suppose to be back here in Jacksonville either yesterday or today, so I am sure he will get back at you as soon as he can. Please be patience until he can submit your application to the Elders, cause they will be the ones making the decision on your forms.

Archie tries to get Roger to waive the membership requirement and keep going with the gold mine business:

Quote:

Dear Roger, i agree with you about Mr Hilts.

Yes it is true that gold business is a profitable one now that President Trump is in charge. But my membership process into the church is delaying and affecting our business. It will be helpful if you can tell Pastor Moses to allow you continue with business as i also continue in the next stage of membership process. If you wait till i complete my membership process, it may affect our business in some ways.

As you know that time is very important in business. Please i would want you to speak to Pastor Moses about this. I believe that at the completion of my first stage of the membership process, i should be given a sense of belonging and trust.

Have a nice day

Roger reminds the lad what happened last time he tried to send money:

Quote:

Yes, I know it is delaying our business that your not a member of my Church yet, and I do want to take advantage of the profits that President Trump will make for us. But remember, we agreed that it is very impotent that you become a member, cause we need the Old Gods to smile on our business so that we don't have any more problems like when those wicked criminals at money gram steeled the money I tried to send to you. Pastor Moses said that the reason that happened was cause I dared to do business with a heathen unbeliever like you, and the Old Gods punished me for it. So in order that we don't have any more problems, I must incest that you complete your membership in the Church before we can continue with the gold business. I just don't want to take the risk. I'm sure you understand.

Anyways, I thought you said you were going to make the devolution picture like you promised? What is delaying you from doing that? That should be very easy for you, and it is a good way to impress the Elders and move your application forward. Please don't delay any more, send me your devolution picture as soon as you can.

I'm not surprised that he is trying to get out of doing the picture, but I am annoyed.

Meanwhile, Hilts decides he hasn't been updated often enough and asks the lad what is going on:

Quote:

Dude, what the fuck is going on? You don't update me on anything, and I haven't seen the old fool in a while. What gives a fuck, man? When is he gonna send the cash? Did you get into the church yet? What's taking so goddam long? I can't wait forever for your slow ass.

Archie complains how long the process is taking:

Quote:

Hilts, its not my fault dude. I told you that the membership process is not as easy as thought. I told you before that the church is making the whole system look like its journey of thousand year. (if only)

I honestly do not have an idea how more long this will last, i have already sent message to Mr Roger instructing him to tell his Pastor to allow him send the money while i continue with the membership process. Because i told him that it can be dangerous to our business.

I am really trying to convince them to send money as soon possible. Please also trying and talk to Mr Roger about it.

Hilts will encourage him to do whatever Roger and Pastor Moses say.

Posted: Tue Apr 18, 2017 4:10 am

Completely forgot about Hilt! ^__^

Baiting Guru Joined: 19 Sep 2013 Posts: 2210

Quote:

Dear, Pastor Moses, i am sorry if i am putting "wagon before the donkey", Honestly i am committed to be a member of the church of old wise Gods. And now i know that i shouldn't admit that i am a member before becoming a full member.

I am glad that the elders are looking into membership, i hope that they will advance me to the next stage.
Pastor, i am really sorry for any offense that i must have committed with my latest mail, i plead that you forgive me.

I consider myself a lucky man to come across Mr Roger(oh yes, very lucky indeed!) and you and in the gospel of the old Gods.

Posted: Tue Apr 18, 2017 9:53 pm

Archie tells Hilts what Pastor Moses said:

Quote:

Hi Virgil, the Pastor was not happy that i told him to allow Roger continue the business while i continue my membership process. He disagreed totally and suspected foul play. I would like you to exercise patience just like i am doing. I know it is getting longer that we expected, but i believe when the membership thing is over we will be both happy. (I am pretty sure I will be, but you will not)

Don't bother telling Mr Roger about it.
I will keep you update once the membership process is done.

Hilts again encourages him to follow Roger's instructions:

Quote:

First of all, only my mother calls me Virgil. Just make it Hilts, ok?

And dude, what the fuck are you bitching about with this thousand years nonsense? What is Roger asking you to do that's so goddam hard? Fill out some forms or some crap like that? That shit should be a fucking cakewalk for a hustler like you!

Look, I'll talk to the old fool if you want, but I think your better off just doing what he says. You defiantly don't wanna piss him off and loose your chance at getting into the church. And I know your trying to get paid, but remember, what Roger's got is peanuts compared to what the church is worth, so focus on the big score. A lot of goddam money is riding on this, so work the job rite and don't screw it up.

Hilts is always good for an inspiring pep talk, isn't he? Very Happy

Baiting Guru Joined: 19 Sep 2013 Posts: 2210

Quote:

Hello my son,

Have you written to Roger? I spoke with him recently and he was still very upset that you had not sent him a picture in regards to our Saint Marry. He is your mentor. You need to get his blessings before the Elders will approve your Stage 1!

Pastor Moses

Posted: Fri Apr 21, 2017 2:37 am

Roger is not pleased with the delay in making the picture:

Quote:

I have not herd back from you in a few days, and I am wondering why you still haven't completed the devolution picture I asked for.

You know, your making it very difficult to take your application to join my Church seriously. You told me that I should go against my Pastor's advise and send money to a heathen unbeliever like you so that we can speed up our gold mining business, but than you don't even respond to me for several days. What is the purpose of saying we should speed up our business, if your just going to slow it down again by ignoring me when I email you?

Than you promised me that you would do the picture I asked for to proof your Faith, but now your not doing that either. I don't like people who make promises and than don't keep them. You know what I call those people? Liars.

I am very disappointed in you, and now I am even more convinced that I need you to do the devolution picture so that I know your serious about your Church membership. In all my years in the Church, I have never seen another applicant who took so long to do anything and made so many excuses for not doing what was asked of him. If you keep this on, I will have no choice but to tell Pastor Moses to cancel your membership precess, and tell Mr Hilts that I am no longer doing the gold deal and he should cancel the transfer.

I don't want to do that, so please do the devolution picture I asked for as soon as possible, ok?

He is resisting sending the picture, for whatever reason. Hilts will give him some more motivation tomorrow if he still hasn't replied.

Posted: Fri Apr 21, 2017 6:13 am

...Hilts will give him some more motivation tomorrow if he still hasn't replied..."

I can not wait to read on! Laughing

Baiting Guru Joined: 19 Sep 2013 Posts: 2210

Quote:

I have message him, and i also apologized to him.
He told me to make a devolution picture to prove that i am committed to becoming a member of the church. I have send it to him today.
Pastor, please i will like to see your picture and that of Mr roger and also your cell phone numbers. So that i can have constant communication with you. I believe that is not too much to ask?

He wants constant communication with us? Sorry, but that would make things move much too quickly. We want to drag this process out over a couple of months. Very Happy

Posted: Sat Apr 22, 2017 1:05 am

Archie came through with a picture, but it wasn't quite what I asked for:

Quote:

Dear Roger, I am very sorry if i acted in a way that seem like an unbeliever. I now understand the way of the old Gods. Pastor has already told me that until i complete my membership you are permitted to continue the business.
I will rather exercise patience to fully become a member of the church of the old Gods than to loose my membership with the church.
Mr Roger, please do not tell Pastor Moses to terminate my membership, from now i will adhere to all your instructions and that of the Pastor Moses.

The attachment below is the devolution picture.

Roger is pleased that he is being more compliant, but asks him to redo it properly:

Quote:

I am pleased your taking this more seriously now. I am sure that if you put your mind and effort into it, you may become one of the greatest members of the Church ever, and that makes me very exited!

But to get their, you need to pay more attention to details. Unfortunately, you didn't fallow my instructive properly for the devolution picture. I am pleased with your enthusiasm, but the sign should say just Marry and nothing else. That is the way the Elders proffer it, just invoicing the name of the Saint and nothing else.

Can you please do the picture again, and send it to both me and Pastor Moses, so he can show it to the Elders and get your Stage 1 application approved? Please make sure this time that the sign just says Marry, cause that is very impotent.

Now that he's done it once, he'll probably agree to do it again.

Elite Baiter Joined: 28 Mar 2015 Posts: 1916

That pic looks more like a woman to me. Smile

Baiting Guru Joined: 19 Sep 2013 Posts: 2210

Quote:

from now i will adhere to all your instructions

Glad to hear it! Very Happy

The pastor will wait until he sends the properly done photo to Roger. As soon as he does that, we will congratulate him on completion of Stage 1.

Posted: Mon Apr 24, 2017 12:17 am

Archie does the picture properly this time:

Quote:

Dear Roger, i hope i did the right thing this time?

Please if i may ask, how much longer will my membership process take? And how
many stage is left? (I don't know, how does infinite sound?)

I will be grateful to you by the time i fully becomes a member of the church.

Please remember that i am not yet a member of the church, so i might be asking or doing what is not right before the Pastor, and the elders. That is the reason you are here to guide and mentor me.

Below is the attached file

Roger will be very pleased when he responds tomorrow.

Posted: Mon Apr 24, 2017 1:05 am

Oh man, this is so good ^_^

Posted: Mon Apr 24, 2017 12:11 pm

Posted: Mon Apr 24, 2017 12:46 pm

Maybe Pastor Moses can blame Archie for not knowing how to correctly write the name of Jesus' mother? Because the correct name is MARY and not MARRY? Laughing

Maybe the good pastor will need a new and correct "devolution picture"? Laughing

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