Coffee Meets Bagel Dating Site full of a scammers

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Hello I'm New here! Joined: 19 Dec 2016 Posts: 2

HI All,
I'm new to this site. I'm just a cool hardworking women who's husband passed away looking for one good man. My granddaughter suggested I try the Coffee Meets Bagel site because she saw it on SHark Tank, Haha, she's so cute. Anyway, I tried it because the concept is great and apparently you have to have a Facebook account to prove that you really exist. I would say that almost EVERYONE who has contacted me is a scammer. And you can by-pass the Facebook link very easily. It's relatively free to join and you can collect beans (I know, Stupid) that earn you connections.
I'm pretty savvy and realize that when words and phrases such as "Dear", "I will like to" and "can't wait to read from you" are red flags. I just want to throw this out there to #1 warn innocent people from getting scammed and #2 if anyone who is into scam busting would want to try this site and catch some scammers, it's like throwing a net into a fish tank full of them. Again you can log on and sign up without ever using your Facebook account. I'd use a profile of a middle aged man or woman. These scammers are ballsy. I've been in touch with one for months, foreign but very well written and well spoke. Had to travel to Turkey on business. (Red Flag) All the while texting me pics while he was there, etc. Was due in on a flight Sat according to an itinerary that yes, he texted a copy of. Was going to call the minute he landed. TWo days later (today actually) I get a call from his 'lawyer'. He was detained, something to do about a death of a woman. I Called him out on his scam and told them to never call me again. Maybe I should have played along, but I just don't have time for that as I work really hard long hours.
There were tons of profiles I bypassed because they looked fake, several others that never got past a few initial messages and a few that I stupidly gave my # to after I told them I was hesitant to after all the scammers I've found on this site. They assured me they weren't scammers. Haha. A few weeks ago one asked if he could send his "luggage" to my home when he came back from serving in Iraq. He was a high ranking serviceman retiring t the end of the month. (Please!!)
I've emailed the site 3 times about the issue with no response. Obviously I'm getting off of it, but I'm beginning to wonder if the whole site was made by scammers and in all likelihood most of the profiles are fake. I just had to put this out there to protect people from this awful, unconscionable theivery. These snakes are the lowest of low, scum of the earth. Thanks and be safe all.

Posted: Tue Dec 20, 2016 10:19 am

Welcome Mermaid.

My own feeling is that the Coffee Meets Bagel site, like many other dating sites has been set up by people with good intentions and not scammers, but who are some combination of naive/overwhelmed/greedy with their influx of new users. This is still not an excuse for failing to remove fake profiles if indeed they are not doing this, but my take is that they are not scammers themselves.

The site's gamified nature (earning/buying beans), along with their apparent policy to restrict matches to facebook friends-of-friends and "limited number/quality matches" has made it very appealing to lots of people. But as you discovered there are numerous issues that can be exploited by scammers - the "Discovery Bagels" allow users to subvert the system and get extra matches outside the restricted range. And, in addition to all the scammers who use fake facebook profiles it's trivially easy to subvert this requirement too ---- like many other dating sites where scammers know their profiles are constantly at risk of being taken down and thus try quickly to get their potential victims off-site, to communicate by email or phone.

You mention that you use fake profiles (middle aged man or woman), but also that you gave out your phone number to some of them. One of our most central rules about baiting is to do so anonymously -- using the phone can be a really great way to bait scammers, but using your own number (or email, or other real personal details) should be avoided. Far better to set up a dedicated baiting phone number (lots of baiters use skype) to avoid scammers figuring out your real identity, or making the phone# useless due to harassment etc. It sounds like you've already figured this out but it's worth being sure.

If you're interested in sticking around here and doing some more baiting with us, you might be interested in signing up for a mentor (link here) --- seems like you have built up some good experience already.

If not, good luck looking for love and keep your eyes peeled for signs of scam. You can always post queries on our sister site scamwarners.com if you are unsure of a contact: here's a link to the romance scam section there.

Hello I'm New here! Joined: 19 Dec 2016 Posts: 2

Thank you, Firhouse5, for your congenial response. I appreciate your time to address the issue.
However, you misunderstood my comment about me using fake profiles. I do not or have ever used a fake profile. I was merely suggesting that if anyone were interested in fishing for scammers they might consider using a fake profile of a middle aged man or woman. I think serial scammers are more attracted to that age group because they possibly have more assets and are less savvy regarding cyber dating than younger age groups. But that might be just my perception. I think it important for anyone of any age be aware that there are no instant relationships, anyone can falsely represent themselves to be someone else. Endearing and loving words and statements of I miss you and I can't wait for us to be together are fallacies. Without meeting someone face to face, these empty promises are just that. Don't get sucked in!!
I've found that scammers also like to target woman by representing themselves as being in the military. I suppose they think women are soft on soldiers...? Love a man in a uniform..? Plus it works well for their scamming agenda. I have seen blogs on military websites warning of these scams and women write, "just tell me the name of the man in the pictures, it's him I'm in love with, not the scammer!" How sad and of course, ridiculous as those men whose personal pictures and identity was stolen have no idea of the fraud and are usually happily married family men.
The point is people have to smarten up and be aware and not send a penny to these scammers who are using the money for god knows what purposes. ...maybe even to aide in terrorism.
Good luck and thanks again!

Posted: Wed Dec 21, 2016 10:15 am

Hi Mermaid and Welcome!

FH5 gives great advice. I'm just going to add that here, we don't "burn" the scammers, ie, tell them we know what they are doing. We don't educate them or tell them what they are doing wrong. We want victims to pick up on the errors in grammar, spelling etc, anything so that scammer won't claim more victims. So if you are going to bait, please don't alert the dirtbags.

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