Looking for romance is all the scammers' places

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Wannabe Baiter Joined: 27 Jul 2016 Posts: 93 Location: USA

I was pursuing the possibility of romance on a dating site so my intent was not scambaiting. I was contacted on a dating site in June by this person. After a few messages we started emailing in June and graduated to Skype chat on July 1, 2016.

Of course his camera did not work and most of the conversations were his attempt to have me “give him my heart”. I recognized scammers and would play along in the slim hope they were real. I will not post the emails because they were the typical cut and paste nonsense.

I finally discovered him accidently on a romance scam site. The paragraphs he shared with me were there as well as the scam he tried with me.

His Background: He lives in Raleigh, NC but is presently in Frankfurt, Germany being mentored by a client so he can open a jewelery store when he returns to the US. That's right, folks, he sells gold and diamonds.

Commentary in red.
July 1, 2016
Him:
Hello
Me:
Hello
Him:
Well finally
We were trying to use YIM
how are you
Me:
Peachy and you?
Him:
very nice
hope you slept well
Me:
yes I did, thank you for asking and you?
Him:
same here
Me:
Busy day today?
Him:
not really
hope you are free to chat
Me:
Leaving in 15 minutes to take the by to eye appointment
then probably movies
boy*
Him:
are you going to the movies alone?
Me:
with my son
Him:
oh okay cool
how many children do you have?
Me:
huh?
who did you think I was going with?
Him:
your new date lol
Me:
would not be talking to you--not that type of person--ow about you?
How
Him:
I don't have kids
how long have you been single?What happened to your marriage?
Me:
Not talking about kids, talking about you with a new date
Him:
You are my new date lol
Me:
I thought I mentioned I am a widow so what happened to my husband is
he died in 2012.
Him:
I like reading previous convos so that I don't forget anything about you
Huh? Have no idea what that meant.
Me:
okie dokie
How is work?
Him:
right now I am not working..I have a client here who's mentoring me about
the jewelry business.I'd like to open a jewelry shop when I return to the states
Me:
no income?
Him:
I make income
lol
I bet he does!!!!
Me:
huh oh legally i hope
Him:
I don't do anything illegal..Have you met any men that does something illegal.
Me:
if I do and they admit it they are thrown to the curb--have no time for nonsense.
so you are a gold and diamond dealer
Him:
yes
Me:
sounds interesting--how can you afford to purchase the gold and diamonds to sell
ok I have to go catch you later
Him:
I have been doing this business for a while,i started from somewhere
like the way you also started from somewhere (are we touchy?)
I will send you an email
Me:
Meant no offense. Just curious. Those items are not cheap and I would
think you need an inventory. I have always been an employee so my start was a lot different from someone who is self-employed
Him:
i got a support from my late uncle,he was in the mining industry
Me:
Sorry for your loss. It was decent of your uncle to support you in the endeavor. Did he have children?
So you are support to be returning on 7/20/16. Getting ready?
Him:
I don't really have a return date yet but i will let you know as soon as possible..He had no children
In the emails I asked about his family. Naturally he did not have any
Me:
Oh sorry to hear that because in a email you said 20th of the next month.
Oh well, not surprising.
Him:
Yes but things have changed
Me:
Obviously
Him:
i am way behind schedule
Is that going to be a problem for you?
Me:
Depends
Him:
on what?
Me:
Well, you said earlier you were not working so what are you "behind
schedule" on? I am not looking for a long distance relationship that could last for months so depends.
Him:
My mentoring
Me:
Mentoring on opening a jewelry store//shop? okie dokie
Him:
yes
Me:
okie dokie
Him:
Your status says cautious,what are you cautious about?
Me:
As a woman living alone I am careful and wary. As a woman with a son
with special needs I am alert. When I drive, I am cautious. Is that a problem for you?
Him:
No it isn't lol
curious why that should be your status on skype
if you are cautious it should be in your head,because i have mine in my head.
Me:
So what should my status be?
Him:
It should be "i want to be close to you Ed" Very Happy

(Huh, no)
Me:
Awww you have a great sense of humor. Can't be close to someone
who is thousand of miles away lol
Him:
yes i know that
but soon enough you would
just keep smiling as you get to know me lol
Me:
smiling away lol
how do you entertain yourself?
Him:
I like to watch movies,read,listen to music and dance
what about you?
Me:
Read, stream on amazon and netflix, movies, listen to music, attend
family get togethers
Him:
Do you like to dance?
Me:
do not have opportunity--closest is doing Tai Chi
Him:
Tai chi?
Then that means if i ever do anything that will hurt your feelings i will end
up in the hospital
Very Happy

Me:
no I do not want to dirty my hands. Would pay someone lol
Him:
lol or you can be a ninja so that i won't know it's you
Me:
Ed that is racist, Ninja is Japanese, Tai Chi is Chinese shame on you Smile

Messing with him
Him:
Oh oh sorry
Me:
Teasing
Him:
have you been to China before?
Me:
Never
You?
Him:
yes i have been there before
it's a beautiful country with nice culture
do you enjoy traveling?
Me:
You s/had seen groups doing Tai Chi
I would like to travel but limited because of son
Also the ISIS scares me
Him:
ISIS is in the middle east
Me:
Did you see what happened in France, Turkey? Are you overlooking the bombings being done to western society. Seriously
Him:
Yes but it can happen anywhere tho even in the states
Me:
happened in the states CA and FL
Him:
Yes the Orlando shooting
i don't know why some people can be so wicked
Me:
This is what cautious means
Him:
i understand
Me:
They are a sad group trying to force their way but then Christians do the same (no insult meant)

Boko Haram
ISIS
ISIL
Just need to stay in prayer
Him:
how old is your son
Me:
31
Him:
Isn't he too old to be living with you?
Me:
I believe I said he is autistic and even if he was not, what do you mean too old to live with me???? (venturing into dangerous territory)
Him:
Well at his age he should be working and must have his own apartment with his gf.
Me:
I suggest you go look up autistic and then return, thank you.
Him:
I know what autism is
you said if he wasn't
Me:
If you had a child you would know that the economy may prevent that
I had to move in with my mother to get on my feet and I was married
I wish he could give me grandchildren but it is not meant to be so I will accept him as the gift he is and take care of him.
If that is a problem, well oh well
Him:
No not at all
I will accept your son the very same way I will accept you
Me:
I have plenty of nieces and nephews any way—even grand ones
Do you celebrate the fourth?
Him:
Yes I do
Me:
Plans
Him:
Not really since I am not in the states
what about you?
Me:
Sorry, that makes sense unless you were on a US military base
I am going to chill and avoid the crowds
Him:
You don't like crowds
Me:
Well, I tolerate them in Disney World
But during the 4th there is drinking anrowdinessd
and rowdiness
Him:
so do you own a home
Me:
Yes
do you?
Him:
I rent an apartment
Me:
in the states?
Him:
yes
NC
Me:
car?
Him:
yes
Me:
what kind. Mine is a CR-V
Him:
chevy cruze
need to go now
will chat with you later
Me:
ok cul
Him:
I am really enjoying getting to know you
Me:
same here
Him:
You are interesting Smile

Me:
as r u be safe
He posted a picture. He did that a lot.

July 2, 2016
Him:
Good morning
Me:
Good morning. Taking shower and getting dressed so catch you later.
Him:
oh okay
how I wish I could join you lol
it will happen soon:)
Me:
I will be in the rest of the day doing laundry

July 3, 2016
Him:
Good morning
Me:
Good morning. Hope your day goes well.

July 4, 2016
Me:
Good morning. Will be out today so hopefully talk to you later
Him:
okay we will chat in the evening
Have a nice day
I will be here thinking of you
hope you send me some pics also
Me:
I will email the pictures and please email me some as well. Until this evening...
Well my evening has passed ao I guess we can try tomorrow

There were days when we hardly communicated and I called them the drought period. I am sure he was talking to other women. In the romance scam site where I found him there was a woman who sent him money and gifts during our emailing period.

July 5, 2016
Him:
hi how are you?
Me:
Hello
Doing well and you?
Him:
I am also doing well just missed chatting with you
Me:
Sorry for the delay, checking email and responding to email. I thought you weree busy with the mentoring when I did not hear anything. Hopefully that is going well.
Him:
Yep..Are you at work?
Me:
I am pretty sure I told you I am retired.
Him:
No you didn't lol
Me:
Ok, I am happily retired.
Him:
what did you retire from?
Me:
Federal government
Him:
what kind of federal government job?
Me:
Are you asking my job title, agency or both
Him:
both
Me:
Primarily clerical and customer service. Worked in (agency), (agency) and retired from (agency)
I know now I should not had told him. Live and learn. This site is very educational.
Him:
oh, okay...So are you planning any retirement trips?
Me:
What is a retirement trip? I retired in 2010.
Him:
vacations after retirement
Me:
Not a rolling stone like you. I have to consider my son when I travel/vaca so usually once a year.
Him:
oh yeah...so what do you do all day at home?
Me:
All day at home lol--I transport my son to and from his day program. I do Tai Chi on Thursdays. I am on a Government Advisory Committee that meets once a month. I do housework, shopping, cooking etc. I play on (games site) and compete on (2 league sites). Probably boring to you.
Him:
Well I guess I need to get to you as soon as possible so that we can have
fun together.
Me:
ok, how
Him:
play board games, take a walk at the beach while holding hands, picnics at the park and a lot more. Wink

Me:
Hard to do so many miles apart.
Him:
I mean when we get together
Me:
Sure
Him:
so what's your favorite color?
Me:
Earth colors-yours
Him:
mine is blue because it reminds me of the beautiful color of the sky
I love nature
Me:
Are you comfortable with on line dating?
Him:
Yes, I am,aren't you
Me:
It is a new animal to me. I am concerned about scammers.
I do not know why I went down this path. Maybe sugar deprived?
Him:
oh right,there are a lot of real men out there so never lose hope
Me:
I try not to lose hope lol. Even scammers are real men so not too comforting lol though I understand women are involved acting as men as well
Him:
have you met scammers before?
Me:
Unfortunately that is an affirmative.
Now, if I was him, I would get away from this person. Nope, he goes on as if nothing happened.
Him:
oh okay...would you like a man who will cook, shop and keep house
Me:
He can keep house. I like to cook and shop
Him:
That's nice,what's your favorite meal?
Me:
I cannot say I have a favorite food. I am adventurous and will eat just about anything but I have to watch the purine content. The one thing I could not stomach was Mexican refried beans.
Him:
Did you run when you ate the Mexican beans lol
Me:
Going to pick up my son. Will try to call you later.
Him:
okay
later
I noticed I was talking to different people from the changes in the writing styles. Wow, an assembly line.

July 6, 2016

Me:
Hard to catch up with you
Him:
hello there hon

July 7, 2016
Him:
Good morning
Hello hope you are having a nice day
Me:
Howdy glad to hear from you. My day is going well and yours
Him:
I had a very nice day
you've been on my mind
Me:
So you say
Him:
Why does it show that you are offline
Me:
I am on the IPAD and it is showing online
Probably the desktop is off line
Will change when I go into the office
Him:
You have an office at home?
Me:
Yes doesn't everyone lol
Him:
Oh yeah lol....So you what should I call you.xxxxx or xxxxxx?
Me:
For you, I will answer to what you are comfortable with
My first name is xxxxx
My second name is xxxxxx
My third name is xxxxxxxxx
What is wrong with me???? I know better!!!!
Him:
so what's your surname?
Me:
in time, in time
Him:
lol I can't wait for that time
Me:
One must be careful in the ethernet
Him:
Yes I know,that means I haven't earned your trust yet
Me:
Handsome and wise, good lol
Him:
Pretty and smart,that's what I like about a woman
you must be very intelligent
Me:
Must? Funny, I would like to think so
Him:
You are hahaha
I really like talking to you
Me:
When we talk, been a drought past couple of days
Been away status for you
Him:
I think we are having the best communcation so far,exchanging emails and chatting
Me:
I would like to see or lacking that, hear your voice
Like
Him:
Still figuring a way out for that to work
Me:
Do you have a cam?
Do you have a mike?
Him:
I have a cam but know mike
Me:
If you have a cam you have a mike. Surely you knew that. Playing dumb does not become you.
Him:
what are you saying
Oh oh, did I say something wrong?
Me:
I am not technical mind. In your field you have to be. Just observing.
Him:
I deal with gold not technology
Me:
Interesting, in order to deal with gold, you need an analytical mind. In order to deal with diamonds (you did mention that) you have to be analytical. A camera records so there is a microphone. Logic. No offense. You have the means to broaden our communication. You choose not. All good. When you are ready then.
Him:
There is a sound device in every computer
if your sound device isn't working then that means no cam
be right back
Goodness, I am feeling a 'tude here. Is it something I said? Now he starts leaving for long periods when he does not like what I say. I am sooooo hurt.
Me:
There ,may be a sound system in the new computers but I have to get a cam for my desktop because it is old. My IPAD does.
Ok, cul
The drought begins because he is "away". We shall see how long it will last.

July 8, 2016
Him:
lol you are funny
Me:
I am glad I amuse you. Usually when someone says they will be right back it is not 11 and a half hours later.
Him:
Yes I know
i am sorry
i get busy sometimes
But that doesn't mean that I don't care about you
Me:
So you say
Him:
So you think I don't care about you?
Me:
did not say that. Action wins out. Busy?
Him:
I am about to go to bed
Me:
Have a good night. Sweet dreams. Be safe. What time is it.
Him:
2:25 am lol
Me:
OMG The time is against us
Him:
you thought we were in the same time difference?
Me:
No Geez You are in Germany after all. I did not look up the difference,
Now I will
That is why I do not care for long distance
Him:
I know right
we will be okay very soon
talk tomorrow
Me:
as you say lol
In an email Mr. Man thought I had feelings for him because I was hurt when he did not come right back. I explained to him that it concerned rudeness not hurt feelings. Geez

July 9, 2016
Him:
Life can be whatever you want to make it. So let it now be a blessing and an achievement with every step you take. Good Morning and have a good day ahead.
Me:
Good morning or in your case, Good afternoon. Today will be busy for me so hopefully we will be able to talk during reasonable hours.
Life is putting yourself in the hands of the Lord so He can govern your steps.
Later
Him: Let me know when you are free
Me:
Greetings
I am free for a bit
Going to cook yay
Him:
What did you cook
Me:
Roasting some chicken thighs I took out on Thursday when I thought my niece and her hubby was coming over. An emergency happened so I did not want them to go bad. Probably will freeze. How is your night over there?
Him:
Very nice,the only thing missing is you
Me:
How sweet.
You there?
Him:
Yes I am here
had to piss
Me:
Thank you for the crudity TMI
Him:
what's TMI
Me:
Too Much Information
Him:
You still don't trust me to give me too much info?
Me:
telephone call will get with you later brother
huh (I was confused by his statement)
Him:
okay
Me:
It is midnight there so you do not have to answer but I am having a hard time with this English as a second language.
You asked me what TMI menas, A common acronym.
I told you it meant Too Much INformation which meant you sharing that you had to piss was TMI from you
So how you turned it around is perplexing
If you are expecting me to trust you and I do not know you, it is not going to happen until after we spend quality time together if it is meant to be
If that presents a problem, be kind enough to tell me so we can move on
I hope that is enough expressing of feelings for you
We were still emailing each other because chatting was difficult due to the time differences. His emails were “telling” me that I needed to trust him. I need to express my self more and share my feelings. He was irritating me because he was trying to get a commitment despite my position of otherwise until we spent quality time together. He was persistent. Good luck grooming me.

July 10, 2016
Him:
We don't need to meet before you can know me,don't you think
Me:
No, I do not think.
Him:
Oh okay I see....Do you chat with other men apart from me/
Me:
I barely have the time to chat with one. Busy. Trying to balance. However, since there is no commitment I do not see anything wrong with you talking to other women and vice versa.
Him:
I like you so I want to chat with you only...I feel you whenever we chat
Me:
I like the conversation I am having with you as I am sure you do. How are you feeling me? We cannot touch. We have not video chat. We have not talked or heard each other voices. So what are you feeling?
Him:
Sometimes there is spark when you text with someone.You feel her in your heart,when you think of her you feel the connection.
Me:
So you have had this experience before? So this is not your first rodeo?
Him:
I haven't but I am now
I have feeling the connection because I concentrate on you and think about you
am*
Me:
Connection?
Him:
Yes
Me:
Clarify. How can you feel a connection when you have not met the person? Not seeing the logic.
Him:
Because I always look at your pics and think of you.You are a very intelligent woman and just the type I want. You will also start feeling it if you put your mind on me.Or am I too ugly for you?
Me:
I am not so shallow that looks are important and all I look at. You are not ugly. I am not going to make a life changing decision like committing when we have not met and spent quality time.
I am going to be away for a bit. catch you later
Him: Okay chat later
Me:
Oh well
Sleep well
Sweet dreams
Catch ya tomorrow
It was too late his time

July 11, 2016

Him:
Good morning.
Me:
Good afternoon (His time). Getting ready to start the day. Half dressed and need to get His Highness ready. Will get with you in my afternoon. Conflicting time zones. Gotta love it 🙂
Him:
Okay I will be available,have a nice day.Any new pics for me?
Me:
I am not a pic person because I do not like my pictures. My family yells at me because I hide and cover my face. I will check my albums and send you new ones. lIf necessary, I will take some new ones this week. Reality show yoo lol
Him:
If your family doesn't like it I do
very cute
(inlove)
Me:
They do not dislike the pictures. They dislike me hiding from the picture taking. Lol
Him:
oh okay
But you shouldn't hide
Me:
My first sentence explains it all
Him:
Yes I got it
are you free to chat
Me:
Until 9 am
(It was 8:43 and nothing from him so at 8:5 Cool

Me:
Catch you later
(tried at 4:42 pm)
Me:
Howdy
Taking a break
(at 8:27 pm)
Me:
Nitey night
sleep tight
(Normally I would block and discontinue contact, but I wanted to see how far he would go)

July 12, 2016

Him:
Good morning
He posted pictures of Frankfurt
I posted a picture of my home, me and my dogs
(I now know that is a no no)
Him:
You have very nice dogs,nice home also.Can I have one as a pet when we get together?lol
Me:
Howdy
You would give them back lol
Him:
It can be a gift lol
Me:
They are spoiled and demanding How are ya?
Him:
I am fine,finished eating dinner...Relaxing now and texting you
Hope you are home
Me:
Yes
I do not have a data plan on my cell phone
so no IM there
Him:
No wifi?
Me:
Huh? Yes I have wifi
How would I be chatting now
I do not have data plan for cell?
You undertsand?
Him:
Yes I understand,so you still on okc?
Me:
yes (6 minutes pass)
busy?
Him:
So are you communicating with any other men
??
Me:
Did you get my email? (This was an answer to his verbose email about just paying attention to each other.)
Him:
Yes but I haven't read it yet
Me:
Your answer is there. I was not aware of a committm
commitment.
Him:
Okay let me read and reply
Me:
Ok later
Now what demand is he going to try.

July 13, 2016

Me:
Good morning. Hope your day is productive.
Him:
Yes it is..How was your night
Me:
Woke up at 4 and could not get back to sleep. Will chat with you later? Getting ready to start the door. Yay
Him:
Okay chat later
Me:
Howdy
sent you an email
Hey XX, you available?
Him:
Hi I am here
Me:
Nice to see you. How was your day?
Him:
Very nice and how is yours
Me:
Peachy since I was able to speak with you. You see my latest email?
Him:
I am about to read let me get back to you later
Me:
Okie dokiew
Him:
So you think I am not real?
Me:
Honestly, not sure.
Him:
why are you nor sure?
Me:
Because I am use to building relationships with someone I can see. I am willing to hear if seeing is not possible.
(I am trying to skype)
Him:
Do you like me?
Me:
I enjoy our conversations so I like you.
Him:
so why don't you want to take down your profile and concentrate on me
Me:
Excuse me?
Didn't you disabled yours?
Him:
yes I did
and I want you to do likewise
Me:
So why do you want me to take mine down and you just disabled yours?
Him:
Because you will still be communicating with other men and you may meet someone that you might like and all our communication will just be useless
(He did not really answer my question)
Me:
Wow, I am feeling flattered in a weird sort of way. Putting stubborness to the side and disabling account. BRB
Him:
nice (inlove)
Me:
Bk You ma y go check
Him:
I can't,mine is deleted completely
Me:
I thought you disabled it???? Why are you deleted????
(I suspect the site banned him)
Him:
i deleted it myself
it's a waste of time for me
well at least it's worth it since you are the only one i am communicating ith
Me:
Cool to-may-toes--to-mah-toes
As I said, I do not have the time to be talking to a lot of people, tiring and I do have a life
Is there a delay on your end?
Him:
no
Me:
So you are carrying on more than one conversation?
Him:
no
Me:
takes a while for a reply sometimes
Him:
I am waiting for you to finish writing
Me:
ok
lol
so I type slow
lol
Him:
lol you are fast just like flash
Me:
I am more of a Marvel comic fan
tolerates DC
Him:
oh why don't you like both
Me:
Like Marvel's characters
They are more realistic
to me
Love the movies
Stan Lee
Will go see DC movies to make fun of them with my buddy
Him:
That's funny,i am sure you've known a lot about me now
Me:
As you say
Him:
haven't you?
Me:
Haven't I what?
Him:
don't you know a lot about me now?
Me:
Clarify
Him:
okay is there anything else you would like to know about me
Me:
When are you returning to the states?
When will your skype be ready for videochatting?
Him:
i am still working on that,my return to the states would be in the first week of august
Me:
Your mentoring will be completed? Videochatting?
Him:
i am talkin about videochatting
Me:
oh, so you are working on the videochatting not the return to the states
okie dokie
Him:
i said my return to the states will be in the first week of august.
Me:
Understood now
So mentoring is done by then?
Him:
still not done,hope to be done on Friday
Besides love,what traits have you noticed in couples that have maintained a successful relationship for many years?
Me:
They enjoy each other"s company. They work together. They understand each other. Where did you get that question from?
Him:
From my mind,True.I always know that in a relationship if one want it to be very strong and firm,there should be trust,honesty.I bet you,everything will be successful and all will be fine.
Me:
The question sounds like it came from a marriage counselor lol. Trust is earned, not haphazardly given and honesty is proven in time.
Him:
well i am a marriage counselor myself lol
Trust, loyalty and respect are a must for eternal happiness. No matter how much you love someone if you dont have these ingredients you will never succeed.
Me:
Before you love you would already trust. You s/be loyal and there s/be respect. Where are you trying to go? With this?
Him: i am not trying to go anywhere i am just saying what's on my mind
Me:
alrighty then
don't say too much
don't want to empty your mind
lol
Him:
my mind is never empty whenever i am talking to the right person Smile

Me:
I could be a zombie that would eat your brains
Him:
yeah but they don't exist haha
Me:
you sure Very Happy

Him:
yep
Me:
So you will be coming back to your apartment?
Him:
i am thinking of going to Dover to meet you first Smile

Me:
What airport?
Him:
i haven't looked yet
Me:
I would suggest you go home first. Where is your home, VA?
Him:
Raleigh in NC
Me:
Yeah, go home
get settled
and then we would make arranements to meet in a safe place
Him:
i wanted to look into your beautiful eyes first before i go home because i care about you Smile

Me:
Awwww
go home
You are near FL right?
Him:
yes
Me:
Looking up map brb
Him:
ok
Me:
Never mind, it is not that close
I have a timeshare with Disney and I thought I'd meet you
once again distance
Him:
not a problem for me
if you want to meet at Disney
Me:
thinking
step at a time
you get home, then plans can be made
you wanted me to meet you at airport?
Him:
we can still make plans
i am always ready
it's up to you
Me:
ok step at a time
you are still a strange man
Him:
what makes me strange?
Me:
I would be a fool not to be careful
stranger to me
Him:
what makes me a stranger?
i am harmless and a very good man with no bad intentions to hurt you
Me:
XX, really?
Him:
yes
Me:
How did you plan this?
Him:
plan what?
Me:
What were you going to do the first week of August?
Him:
yes
so what are you talking about now?Plan what?
Me:
How were planning your trip, XX?
Him:
Go to Germany and then return to the states
why?
Me:
Where are you now?
Him:
where do you think i am
Me:
You tell me
Him:
what did i tell you
Me:
You do not know what you told me?
Him:
i don't understand why you are asking such question when you already know where i am
Me:
You stated you are going to Germany and then the states. Where are you, XX?
Him:
you are misreading my texts
you asked how i planned my trip and then i said my plan was to go to Germany and then return to the states
Me:
Ed, you are beginning to amuse me.
I was asking about your plans to return to the states.
I did not misread.
You misunderstood in a very strange way.
Him:
so why are you asking me where i am when you already know
Me:
Because of the context of your statement.
Him:
ok
Me:
I know where I am. State of DE. Dover address even though I am closer to Cheswold. Kent County. Over 55 community. Odd, you would not say. Such a simple question.
Him:
you know i am in Germany
so what else should i tell you
Me:
That is all you had to say, no sweat. Wow, touchy.
Your statement would be interpreted as you being somewhere else, English is my only language and I scored 98% in comprehension
Him:
If you are thinking something bad about me i will always be strange to you.Think positive and let things just work between us
Me:
You are going to be a stranger (not strange, there is a difference) until we meet. Surely, you know that?
Him:
no i don't,exchanging pictures and all that should let you know that i am not a stranger
don't base that on the fact that we haven't met
(Does that even make sense???)
Me:
Once again I will use the tomato analogy
Him:
you said you will be a fool not to be careful,tell me what you are thinking
Me:
Ed, despite the exchange of pictures and the emails and the IM, we are strangers. We do not really know who we are until we meet. I suggest we agree to disagree because my mind is not going to change on this. If you have read up on online dating, and I am sure you have because you are not a dumb man, you know there was dangers. Women have gone to meet someone and end up in bad situations, even death. You may be a good man with no ill intentions, but I intend to err on the side of safety.
I am not understanding your difficulties with that.
BRB son needs me for a sec
Him:
you are taking all this strange thing to another level,how will you be in a bad situation when the only thing i am looking for is just a relationship,how does being in a relationship let you end up in a bad situation
i don't need to read anything about online dating,i am only looking for a relationship and if the person that i meet isn't right for me i just move on
Me:
Ok Ed, as you say
We will cross that bridge when we get to it
you there?
Him:
What do you think will happen when we meet?
Me:
At this point I would probably slap the mess out of you for being so obstinate
no tai chi involved
Him:
i just want you to understand something
it's not always that we have to meet before we can fall in love
what matters is what you both feel in the heart not what you see with the eyes
Me:
Well, XX, you are definitely going into a path that you may want to remove yourself from
Falling in love is a life changing action
I and I emphasize I am not going to tell anyone I love them sight unseen
How will I know of chemistry is there is no proximity
How would know there is a spark if we do not touch
Him:
If you want to know there will be spark and chemistry when we meet,you need to put your mind on me,concentrate on me and give me all your attention
You will feel the way i feel
Me:
Boy, I am not some teenage girl who is going to kiss a photo and profess my love
Him:
i am not telling you to kiss my photo
Me:
Also, I have a son, mister, so this concentrating on you and giving you all my attention
huh? seriously?
Read the whole sentence and try to understand the context
Him:
i understand what you mean
or am i not attracted to you?
Me:
How can you be attracted to me???? You have not met me. Really????
Our spirits may ne synched.
Not*
Him:
you think it's only if you meet before you can be attracted to someone?
Me:
Huh, yes
Him:
that's why camera's were made for visuals
Me:
How about seeing in person so body language couls be read (videochatting would allow that) or speaking to each other (wow, skype does that too)
could*
Him:
i have also noticed something about you,you have never commented on my pics before which makes me think i am not attracted to you
Me:
You brought that up before and I did respond.
Him:
so now is the better time for you to respond
Me:
You are not a bad looking man buyt it is what is in the heart that matters that is not really known until you speand quality time together. Satisfied?
Him:
you can also know all that if you communicate to know what each other wants
Me:
Wow, not feeling it. Give it up, XX, I am old school
Him:
then you don't want me
Me:
If that is how you feel, there is nothing I can do. I disabled my OKC. I have communicated with you via OKC, email and here. If you want to take that route, so be it. But know this, I have my own mind, I know what I want and no one, no one will change that. I told you I wanted a man to love, honor, respect. I do not need a man.
The ball is in your court.
I am sorry I am ab;e to think for myself.
Him:
am I not that man you would want?
Me:
XX, I would not be here if I did not want to really know you si I can see if I want you.
Him:
okay
need to sleep now
good night
Me:
Good night
He began what I call the great dismissal. During the above exchanges, I was angry with him and his attempt to play mind games but I wanted to actually go all the way to the end game. Whew, it was hard.

July 14, 2016
Him:
Hi how are you?
Me:
I am fine and you?
Him:
I am doing great
Are you at home?
Me:
Whenever I am on here I am home. I told you my cell phone does not have data.
phone call
Him:
oh okay I didn't know that
will you go out today or you will jut be at home
Me:
picking up son
Him:
hope we still have a little time to chat
Me:
we will
Him:
have you read my email
Me:
Seems you were speaking from your heart
Him:
Oh yes I always speak from my heart,I have a really good heart, do you?
Me:
I have a really big heart. I was a caregiver of a person who died from cancer and I am a caregiver to my developmentall delayed son. I am a helpto my family and I am empathic. However, I still do not believe I will be using these traits for someone I have not met. You have made your position clear but you need to understand that is how I feel.
Him:
what do you mean by I have made my position clear?
Me:
What don't you understand? Should I cut and paste what you said?
Him:
i am nit expecting you to use your traits,it's up to you to do whatever you want to do with your heart.I don't own you and i can't control you,i am not a magician.
Me:
As you say
I would like to meet you
Him:
I would like to meet you also to proof that what i want to give you is for real
Me:
You really do not have to give me anything. My independence prevents that. NOw if we were to hook up, we shall see.
On an aside, my niece and her husband are coming tomorrow
I am paying them to wash the windows
Him:
You don't want me to give my heart to you?
Me:
Talking about materail things, XX
Him:
i wasn't talking about that
Me:
So now I know
Him:
You don't look like someone who needs material things ($$?)
Me:
Hence the independence
You also have that look about you as well
You mentioned you are financially secure in an email
Me:
Yes i am,you look like someone who needs to be loved.True love and happines
Me:
A very sweet thing to say. Odd, you have that look about you as well. Pity, I will not know if I love you until we meet. Comme ci Comme ca
Him:
I’m the man that wants love. I want to fall into the same bed a million times and feel completely comfortable and at home with whoever I decide to settle down with.I feel you are the one but you don't feel that way to make things complete
Me:
C'est la vie. You seek what most human beings want. Some human beings
will give it signt unseen. They will accept the words and the pictures as sufficient to give their hearts away. They willingly give trust because they allow their imaginations and hope to guide them.
Then there are people, like me, who need to see touch, feel, caress, kiss the being.
Know that despite the sweet words, the pictures there is a human being you can have and hold and call your own.
So the differences make the uniquenwss of the human race.
uniqueness*
Him:
I am also that type of person who need to see,touch,kiss and cuddle.I can't have sex with you on skype lol.I am just expressing how i feel because i don't want it to seem like i just want your body but not your heart,soul and mind.
Me:
You can't even videochat or talk on Skype so not a good example lol.
I would not deal with someone who was just seeking a booty call.
I want more that that
Him:
how would you know that i just don't want a booty call?
Me:
Because when you would try to get the booty, my boot would kick you to the curb.
Hence meeting in a safe place
Him:
You will never see it coming,trust me on that
but that's not what i want,i also want more
Me:
Oh oh, sounding like a predator there
Him:
Oh yeah i want you to know that
i am not looking for a booty call
You seem like a very good woman and i see it from your smile
Me:
Yeah but you said I would Never See It Coming, frightful to hear from someone who was insistent they were not a danger yesterday
You argued about the stranger concern
Wow, Ed, you are an engima
Him:
if i wanted to do that i wouldn't have said that
Think about that lol
Me:
Thinking you meant what you say and it makes me wonder what you would do but we will croos that bridge if we come to it (shock)
Him:
lol did i scare you?
Me:
If you scared you would be blocked so fast your head would spin
Him:
well life will still go on
do you get scared easily?
Me:
No, do not have a spirit of fear
Is that your goal? |-(
Him:
my goal is for you to open your heart to me
all this talks is to learn more about you,remember haha
Me:
I chuckle at a lot you say, wish you could hear it
When will you start planning your return?
to the states?
Him:
next week
Me:
not Germany lol
Him:
you are funny,so do i make you smile?
Me:
yup, a lot (laughing at you)
Him:
all this and i still can't win your heart?Hahah
Me:
Seriously? A comedienne could make me laugh and would not get my heart lol.
Him:
good..i need to go now,chat later (kiss)
Me:
so dismissive later
Midnight there so Good night
Chat tomorrow

July 15, 2016
Me:
Hello
Waiting on the noece, her husband and the child
They got a “little” lost
Hope your day si going well
is*
You
Thet made it!!! yay
Him:
Hi there
Me:
Howdy
Him:
I am doing great and you?
Me:
Going through paperwork and selecting which one s/be shredded. Fun fun fun
so how is the menroring going?
Him:
Well I am done with it like I said,i will be traveling on Sunday to Ghana and
then from there to the states.Do you know Ghana?
Me:
I know it is on the continent of Africa. Why would you be going (bet he is already there)
Him:
Well I need to check out some gold,very good place and very affordable prices
Me:
Since it is your business you have to go where the gold is lol
Him:
Oh yes, do you like jewelries?
Me:
Sure, what womwn wouldn't?
Him:
some women don't
Me:
Not me
Him:
lol that's why I like you
Me:
cause I like jewelry because it is a good investment
Him:
because it will look beautiful on you
Me:
no argument there. Do you wear jewelry?
Him:
yes I do,love gold and diamond watches
(Natch)
Me:
My watch is the cell phone lol—where in Ghana are you going?
Him:
Kumasi
Me:
Been there before?
Him:
first time
Me:
Well, be careful
Him:
I will my dear
Me:
Well, how long will you be there?
Him:
2 weeks
Me:
until the end of this month, cool
Him:
They say life is about simple pleasures, what is your simplest pleasure, and how does it make you feel?
Me:
Sorry besides going through paperwork, rec'd call and paid bill. fun fun fun
simplest pleasure? being with my siblings and cutting up--makes me feel loved and joyful
Him:
life has simple pleasures and it makes me feel good cos it's a great thing on this earth to have someone special in your life, have fun with , share ideastogether and also share everything you have with.
Me:
I have not known that pleasure since the loss of my husband. It would be nice to know it again.
Him:
You will know it and you will always feel it.I will let you feel it always
Me:
We shall see
Him:
Does life look good to you right now,do you have any health isues
Me:
Why, are you a doctor?
Him:
I am a love doctor lol
Me:
Good answer,
As we get older there are issues but I am doing fairly well
Afraid you may be a caregiver?
Him:
oh know I am not afraid,i will even enjoy being your caregiver (inlove)
Me:
Well, I will not be in that boat for many years, God willing.
Him:
That's nice,i would love to go to church with you someday Smile

Me:
I have to be led to one first.
Him:
you don't go to church?
Me:
Not lately, do you?
Him:
It's been a while
Me:
Going to pick up His Highness. Catch you later.
Him:
okay honey
(kiss)
Me:
Still going through my papers. My nil is doing a great job on the windows and doors.
It was 3:44 pm my time so it seems he was not available

July 16, 2016
Me:
Well I know your day has started and I am getting ready to start mine. Have a good day.
Read the email and responded.
Guess I have not heard from you because you are getting ready to go to Kumasi, Ghana. Good luck in your business venture. Sleep well so you can be wide awake during the transactions. I will be at my brother's for BBQ so will probably be talking with you Monday. Later

July 17, 2016

Him:
Hi I will be leaving tonight
Me:
Love the way you disappear. Safe journey.
Him:
hi sexy
Me:
Getting ready to go to my brother
Hello, XX This is a surprise. Thought you be on the plane.
Him:
it's 5:30pm here
I will be leaving around 8pm
Me:
How long is the flight?
Him:
7 hours
Me:
Almost as long as a workday here. Hope your papers are in order.
Him:
oh yes everything is ready
you weren't as happy as you read my last email right
Sharing the email and my response for understanding
_____________________________________________________________Him:
I miss talking to you and i hope to talk to you today.My favorite weekend day with you would look something like this: Sleeping in, waking up slowly wrapped around each other, enjoying a cup of coffee in bed while planning our day.I love learning new things especially personal growth stuff like how to connect more deeply and authentically with each other. Dinner could be either in town or cooking Thai Green Curry together, then sitting down with wine and sensual music, before we cuddle up on the sofa for a movie or hit town to go dancing....
-
I will like to go for a late evening walk round a local park together.Stay in bed all day together, have a candle lit bath together.And then we give each other a massage,cuddle up and watch a film together.Listen and dance to your fav music,have fun making a list of what you like in bed and then swap !!

I keep thinking about you everytime,i feel so lonely not being with you and not talking to you face to face.I am looking forward to that.All i want from you is your love,open your heart for me.All i want is to see you smile always,all i want is to see you happy always.

Me:
Well your weekend would be grand for someone who is not the caregiver of adult child with special needs. Not at all personalize.
If you are lonely, maybe you should be more active. I would think the interactions in the gold and diamond business would prevent that.
It appears you are not or you are refusing to understand my position on professing love for someone I have not seen or spent quality time with. If you continue to be insistent I am thinking you are not being considerate of my feelings and I am wondering how you would be in person.
Just as trust should not be given haphazardly, love should not be uttered willy nilly
Me:
Perceptive you are.
Him:
were you happy or annoyed?
Me:
Well, had to pause. What I wrote was clear. Amateur psychoanalyzing is not necessary Very Happy

Him:
so what do you think we can do together?
Me:
Will know when we get together. After we are sure we click, of course.
Him:
do you have hopes that we will click?
Me:
Of course, I do. It is predicated upon meeting you, spending quality time with you.
Him:
Need to go now,have fun with your brother
I will message you when I get to Ghana
Me:
Another dismissal, eh? lol Have a safe trip.
Him:
lol okay (kiss)

July 18, 2016
Him:
Hello XXXXX
I am in Ghana now but I have a little problem and I need your help
Me:
Hello
Him:
How are you?
Me:
Just waking up. (6:22 am)
Problen?
Him:
Yes I have a problem,i lost my luggage when I got to Ghana.I had my wallet in it and ii don't have any cash on me right now so I wanted you to help me with some money to book a hotel I will pay you back when I meet you okay.I haven't had any rest and I am so tired
Me:
Why would your wallet be in your luggage? That is not even logical. Am I to understand you did not reserve a hotel room? You stated you were financially secured so why can't you get to your funds!
Him:
Because my credit card was also in my wallet.i was going for a meeting before my flight so I didn't want to have a lot of stuff on me so I decided to put my wallet in my luggage,i forgot to take it back after my meeting
Yep, that makes a lot of sense
Me:
So call the credit card company and have them advance you until they can issue you a new one. The hotel should help you with that.
Him:
Are you going to help or not?
Me:
Help you how? I do not know how to send money.
Him:
You have to go to moneygram to send money
Me:
What is a moneygram?
Him:
It is an international money transfer company,it's everywhere in the world.
Me:
Are you their spokesperson?
Him:
no but you should know since you go to the bank
Me:
Credit union. I would not get snippy if I were you. You were the one who "left your wallet" in your luggage for a weird reason and is asking for funds from a stranger. There is nothing showing moneygram where I bank. How much do you think you need?
Him:
I am sorry
i need $1200
Me:
Where are you staying? Ritz? That is a lot of money.
Him:
I am just here with my tour guide,i know it's a lot but i am going to pay you
back
i am in Kumasi now
Me:
Ed, How can I be sure you are going to pay me back? You were suppose to be in the States a while ago so how do I know you won't change it again?
Him:
Because after this trip i am coming back,it's because of this trip that's why i stayed
I promise
i am a man of my words
Me:
You stayed because you were being mentored. So already your credibility is
shot. You said you are with a tour guide? Send a picture with that person showing you where you are.
You:
he's not around at the moment but i can let someone take a picture of me.Will you know Africans if you see them?
Me:
What kind of question is that? Are you being condescending? You just said you were with the tour guide and now you are not? Where exactly are you?
Him:
I am in Ghana
i said i am with my tour guide doesn't mean i am with him at this very moment
Me:
I now that, are you at the airport?
Hotel
store
embassy
Him:
not at the airpot,at a bus stop at the streets
let me send the picture
are you there?
Sent a picture of him balancing a container of something on his head.

Me:
How far are you from the airport?
Him:
30 minutes far,why?
Me:
Thought you would still be there since you had no money. The children in the background is a nice touch. I am going to get dress and check my funds. That is a lot of money and you would not be taking it from me but my son as well.
Him:
I understand
let me give you my tour guide's info because he's a citizen here and has a valid id to withdraw money
Name:XXXXXXXX $war$o
Country:Ghana
City:Kumasi
Let me know when you are done okay (7:39 am)
Are you there? (10:26 am)
Hello (12:14 pm)
Got dressed, got my son dressed, took son to dentist, grocery shopping
Me:
Hello Ed, I went to the credit union and they do not do moneygrams. Do you have another suggestion?
Him:
But you could have told me long ago,there must be some close to where you live or any grocery store.Can you google any moneygram locations near you?
Me:
Once again you are being snippy to the person who is trying to help you out of a mess you put yourself in. You are expecting me to go out of my way for a stranger who probably lived in Ghana the whole time and was seeking a mugu to finance him. Good bye, Ed. I have no regrets. Look out for karma.
Him:
what are you saying?
what do you mean?

BLOCKED

Have not heard from him but it would be hard since I blocked him in Skype and my email.
Hope you all enjoyed.

Posted: Sat Aug 06, 2016 10:02 am

Hi Darthama and
Welcome to Eater.

Right away, I have to tell you you're not baiting safely. Your scammer has information from your dating profile, including your real life email. You gave him your name and real life phone or skype. You are dealing with a criminal and it is not safe at all. He's got all the info he needs to harass you and it has happened. Please bait safely which means you should never give out your personal deetails. If you want to romance bait, set up a fake account. There are lots of people on the forum who can help with this. Do not ever give out your email and phone number-you can set up a fake character with one of the free email providers r get another number on skype.

https://forum.419eater.com/forum/viewtopic.php?t=176248

Please read the stickies for forum rules and further info on baiting safely.

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