The Eric & Franklin Saga (Hilts/UZUMBO chop page 24)

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Master of Master Baiters Joined: 21 Nov 2008 Posts: 619

Looking at his words closely, he's not denying they are gay. He's only saying they don't "practice gay in anyway" just because it's against their doctrine rules.

Could keep belaboring the gay thing by telling him it must be very tough to be gay and not be able to practice it due to their rules.

Posted: Sat May 28, 2016 6:19 pm

The question about the gay demographics of the orphanage is still unanswered. There will have to be affidavits about this among the paperwork required. And also perhaps a picture of Eric and Franklin, in front of the orphanage, with 57 orphans (and it better be EXACTLY 57) and maybe they can just point arrows at the ones who identify as the opposite gender? And all 57 orphans should be holding signs - the trans-identifiers can hold up a "Thank you Roger" sign, and the others can have a "Get well Betty" sign.

Perhaps grudgingly, if that can't be arranged, then 57 separate orphan pictures can be submitted, but then each poor boy or girl will have to have a sign with a different note. And each will have to indicate their gender identification and inclinations towards gayness?

(Lord, that's so over the top, but these lads deserve it)

And please, Big X, don't forget about demanding the death certificates at some point...

Master of Master Baiters Joined: 24 Dec 2012 Posts: 699

When did the package dissapear btw.

Posted: Sat May 28, 2016 8:32 pm

Is it the only gay orphanage in the village? Shocked

Baiting Guru Joined: 10 Oct 2010 Posts: 3877

so, as funny as it is to have a lad insisting on not being gay, I'd say, focus on every little detail of their journey. basically a day by day report. the company needs to understand their suffering in great detail. and it'd be better accurate.

Twisted Evil

Baiting Guru Joined: 19 Sep 2013 Posts: 2210

Quote:

When did the package dissapear btw

Dennis Rodman is still holding it safely while all this compensation gets sorted out. Of course it's possible that Roger didn't get that information and will need clarification on that matter... Interestingly I notice the lads are now writing as if the package may now be missing. I am betting that they are now just hoping for this big fat pile of cash to drop into their bank account so they can just forget about the curse of the package completely.

Meanwhile, Eric writes to Dan and tells him the exciting news about the compensation!

Quote:

Hello Brother Dan,

How are you doing and sister Betty? I have a good news.

I writing to inform you that Mr Roger Bartlett, the customer complaint
department of the GPS Company said that they are sorry for what
happened in the past. He wrote to us that the GPS will
compensate us with money for the package and they have already
calculated the market price rate for the items in the package and they
prepared to offer us with a compensation of $40,000.00 dollars.

He also promised that the GPS company will continue to do their
best to locate the package and have it delivered to us soon, that if
we agree to these terms and they will send us the proper paper work
and pay us the money soonest.

Brother Dan, I suggested for us to take the compensation from the GPS
company and buy those items in the market here in Ghana and
deliver it to the orphans as you requested, so that we can have
pictures to send to sister Betty as she requested. I hope she will get
rest of mind to recover back from her illness, if the GPS
deliver the package to us. I hope is still useful for the kids,
because we have suffered a lot from the GPS company wrong
delivery and next time we will not try to do business with the GPS
company again. What do you suggest?

Nice of him to ask Dan what he suggests...

Quote:

Hello Brother Eric,

Yes indeed that is wonderful news! Praise God for this blessing that is about to be given to you and Franklin to help the beautiful orphans!

$40,000 does seem very generous. Although I am thinking about all the ways that GPS has frustrated you over these many months, do you think that we should demand more money from them? After all, you and Franklin have spent nearly five months now trying to collect this package and they have continued to frustrate you with all of this while my lovely Betty fights to survive here!

Perhaps you should demand that Mr. Barnett and the GPS complaints department should give you $57,000! That would be $1,000 for each of the orphans. Then each orphan would have $1000 and an iPad each. Doesn't that seem like a nice fair amount for all the troubles that you have frustrated through?

I am going to write an email to that Moses Malone and tell him about this idea! The more I think about how they have frustrated you over these many months the more mad I get. I am worried about Betty each and every day and it is all their fault! I am going to write Mr Malone and have him tell Mr. Barnett that we think $57,000 is more fair!

Please keep in contact with me about the latest developments with Mr. Barnett and the compensation fund! If we are finally able to get some money and iPads delivered to you and the orphans I just know it will lift Betty's spirit!

Regards, Dan

Posted: Sun May 29, 2016 8:31 am

I am sure the compensation will be suitably generous (and easy to arrange).

limburger wrote:

Looking at his words closely, he's not denying they are gay. He's only saying they don't "practice gay in anyway" just because it's against their doctrine rules.

No I think you have misunderstood. They don't practice because they are really good at it already.

Posted: Sun May 29, 2016 6:16 pm

Perhaps Roger can confirm this interpretation. There is also the chance that Eric and Franklin would be interested in donating to a charity with all of their soon-to-be-acquired money.

Not quite a Newb Joined: 07 Oct 2010 Posts: 70

Yes, yes! Build up their hopes with a huge wad of cash, and, then, somehow Uzumbo gets in touch with Roger and chops their dollah! lol.

I thought that might make an interesting angle to add to the current fraudstration.

Apologies if this is a crappy suggestion -- this is my first post as a suggestion to a bait. Smile

Posted: Tue May 31, 2016 6:19 am

^ It's a good suggestion. We will get to that point eventually. For now, I am deliberately drawing everything out for as long as possible. Roger will continue to request further information and forms from the lads for a while yet, before we run into problems with the compensation payment.

Not quite a Newb Joined: 20 Nov 2012 Posts: 68

Discombobulated lass wrote:

Is it the only gay orphanage in the village? Shocked

Dunno why, but I just heard that in Daffyd's voice....

http://www.bbc.co.uk/comedy/littlebritain/characters/daffyd.shtml
Smile

Baiting Guru Joined: 19 Sep 2013 Posts: 2210

As promised, Dan emailed Moses Malone and told him that they wanted $57,000 instead of just $40,000.

Of course, Moses is not a part of the reimbursement process since he was demoted to the late night package handler position by Mr. Rodman, but he still writes to Franklin and tells him what he thinks:

Quote:

Hello Mr. Franklin,

I am writing to inform you that I got an email from Dan Hamilton the other day, the sender of your package.

He informed me that GPS approved a $40,000 reimbursement for you and Mr. Eric for your troubles with collecting the package. I must tell you this is the first I am hearing of this because I am no longer a Regional Manager, because Mr. Rodman demoted me to the lowest position in the company as late night package handler.

Then Mr. Hamilton said something that really got me upset. He told me that $40,000 was not enough and he said that you are demanding $57,000 instead!

Now, I am not allowed to be a part of the reimbursement process because Mr. Rodman yelled at me and told me I was a fool and that I was not allowed to have any part in this but I must say that it makes me very upset to hear that you are being so greedy as to demand even more money than $40,000 that was already approved!

Since being demoted to late night package handler position, I may never see that kind of money in my life! I am struggling just to feed my family on this low wage and to hear that you are not happy with $40,000 this gets me very upset! Last night I tried to sleep with my wife and she would not let me get near her, she told me I was not a real man and that I was a failure to my family because I don't make good money anymore and she said my penis was of no interest to her anymore! This is my life now because of this package! I would be so thankful for $40,000 but to hear that you are demanding $57,000 now it just makes me so upset!

Moses

I figure it can't hurt to have one more disgruntled GPS employee out there causing stress for our boys...

Posted: Tue May 31, 2016 10:17 am

^Wouldn't it also be inconvenient if Moses' former colleagues don't agree with his demotion and disgrace and are planning to sabotage the deal with the Lads to make Mr Rodman look bad?

Posted: Tue May 31, 2016 2:07 pm

There's absolutely no chance of it being inconvenient, especially for Eric and Franklin. Why not incorporate North Korea into this? Dennis Rodman may have some connections there that want to steal the money or otherwise mess up the deal.

Baiting Guru Joined: 19 Sep 2013 Posts: 2210

Franklin writes to Moses:

Quote:

Hello Mr Malone,

Thank you for your mail.
I went through your message and i understood that you are not happy.
To be honest with you, Mr Roger Bartlett the GPS customer
complainant department contacted us that GPS has agreed to
compensate us with the sum of $40,000.00 dollars.

We agreed with the amount they promised to give both of us and I have
already responded back to Mr Roger Bartlett that we accepted, before i
contacted Mr Dan Hamilton to update him on the development to know
that GP company promise to compensate both of us with the sum
of $40,000.00 dollars to sort out the issue amicably.

He replied back that he suggested the amount is not enough, after we
suffered to collect the package, that he will contact you to discuss
about the issue without knowing that you have not heard about the
compensation. We are very sorry for the inconvenience, because we
really want to sort out the issue amicably.

Please don't be upset at point, help us to tell Mr Dennis Rodman and
Roger Bartlett that we accepted the $40,000 dollars the GPS
promised to compensate us. I have already contacted Mr Dan Hamilton
that we accept the offer from Mr Roger Bartlett and I'll also write to
him to know that we are ok with the amount the GPS company
promised to give us.

We are waiting for Mr Roger Bartlett to send us the paper work to sing Very Happy

as they requested, before they will compensate us and we cannot change
our mind to instruct Mr Dan Hamilton that the money is not enough for
us.

Have a good day ahead.

Regards,

Mr Franklin Obi

And to Dan:

Quote:

Hello Brother Dan,

How are you doing today and sister Betty's health condition at the
moment? I am writing to inform you that i got an email from Mr Moses
Malone in the morning and through his email, i understood that he is
not happy that we are demanding $57,000.00 from the GPS
company.

He told me that this his first time of him hearing about the
compensation issue, because he's no more a Regional Manager in the GPS
eTrack company. He said that Mr. Dennis Rodman, the CEO of GPS
demoted him to the lowest position in their company as late night
package sorter, because of he fails to deliver the package to us as
you requested.

Mr Moses Malone wrote to me that we supposed to be thankful with the
$40,000 dollars they promised us and why are we demanding $57,000
dollars. I understood that Mr Moses Malone wants to remove himself
from the trouble he caused to we all, because he said that he is not
allowed to be a part of the reimbursement process because Mr. Rodman
yelled at him that he is not up to be a Regional manager.

Brother Dan! I pleaded to you to accept their offer, because Mr Roger
Bartlett, the GPS customer complaint department emailed me
today and it seems like they all angry with us why we are demanding
$57,000 dollars. And since we have informed you about the compensation
issue that they will wait until you accept before they will send us
the paper work to sign before they will compensate us.

Please write back to Mr Moses Malone to write back to Mr Roger
Bartlett,that, you agreed with the terms since they promised to sort
out the issue amicably. We don't want the GPS company to change
their minds not to give us the money they promised, because It will
effect our lives here. We have committed ourselves to borrowed money
from people and friends hoping that we will collect the package
easily.

Brother Dan, please understand the situation we all are facing now, we
can manage the $40,000.00 dollars with the orphans and we don't want
things to be complicated at this point. We are waiting for Mr Roger
Bartlett, the GPS customer complaint department to send us the
paper work to sign as they requested, before they give us the money.

I will update you once we finalize with the GPS about the
compensation issue.

Stay blessed and regards to sister Betty

Posted: Wed Jun 01, 2016 5:06 am

^ Odd, Roger never said anything about being upset with the updated demand for $57,000, but the lad seems to think he is angry and is treading carefully as a result. I guess that's not a bad thing.

Roger asks the lad to confirm the amount with Dan:

Quote:

I hope you had a good Memorial Day weekend! I am glad you have gotten in torch with Mr Dan Hamilton about excepting the compensation we have offered. Once you hear back from Mr Dan and except our terms, I will have the finance department draw up the paper work and send it to you, so we can complete your case.

By the way, I spoke to my colleague Mr Limburger about your case, and what he said made a lot of sense. He fingered out why you are denying the obviated fact that you are gay. You said you don't practice it in anyway because it's against your doctrine, and I wondered why you said it like that, in stead of just saying your not gay. Then after I spoke to Mr Limburger, it suddenly made sense: you are gay, but you feel like you can't act on it because it's against your religion. I know that must be a struggle for you, to have such strong homosexual urgencies but be forced to be celebrate and abseil from gay sex because you are fateful to your religion. Would you mind telling me more about your religion? I am a religious man myself, and I always like to learn more about other countries worship practices.

Also, what are these pictures you mentioned? Are they pictures of you and your gay partner Mr Eric with the orphans? If so, we would like to have that for our case file here. In a job like this, it is always good to know who you are helping with your work. Please send the pictures as soon as possible.

The lad explains what happened with Dan, and denies the gay accusations again:

Quote:

Thank you for your mail and i appreciate your efforts in this case. We
really want to make sure that we finalize this issue amicably. I am
writing to inform you that we have already contacted Mr Dan Hamilton,
the sender of the package to know that the GPS company promise
to compensate us with the sum of $40,000.00 dollars to sort out the
issue and he appreciate your efforts a lot.

He responded back to me that he accept the terms, but he wrote a
letter to Mr Moses Malone that he suggest if the GPS will give
us $57,000 and i told him that we've already accepted the $40,000.00
dollars the GPS promised to compensate us for the hardship we
passed through in our failed trips.

We have confirm from Mr Dan Hamilton to receive the amount and i told
him to contact Mr Moses Malone to understand that we really want to
sort out the issue without delay. Please don't be upset at this point,
because we really want to sort this matter as soon as. I want you to
understand me, the reason why i update Mr Dan Hamilton about the
compensation is to know that GPS promise to compensate both of
us for what happened in the past.

I assured Mr and Mrs Hamilton that we will be transparent to both of
them, since they bring their minds together to trust both of us and
send package to us to help them donate the gifts to the orphans in
Ghana. We are waiting for the documents to do the needful as you
suggested, so that we can finalize the issue without delay.

Regarding gay you was discussing with your colleague, what i mean that
we don't practice gay is that we don't support gay rights in the
Republic of Ghana and we don't have sex with each other.

You can go through the book of Leviticus 18:22 in the bible and you
will understand what the bible said against gay.

Regarding the picture you asked about in your previous email. I
mentioned that Mrs Betty Hamilton requested us to snap the children
with their gifts, because she wants all the kids to hold his or her
toy in that picture. It is only what she requested from us, if we
receive the package and deliver it to the orphans. We made a promise
to do what she requested from us.

I await to receive the paper work to do the needful.

He sent that email after working hours, so Roger hasn't seen it yet. But Roger will have further questions about damn near everything when he responds tomorrow.

Baiting Guru Joined: 10 Oct 2010 Posts: 3877

I wouldn't stretch that gay-angle too much.

and regarding the package compensation, brother dan could ask sister betty in the gentlest way he can, and her heart immediately stopped. she needed to be shocked five times with the defibrillator, before she came back. so it's imperative to get the package to the orphans, not some compensation.

Posted: Wed Jun 01, 2016 2:38 pm

Yeah, I'm thinking that Robert is right. I mean, you can continue to sprinkle the homosexual implications in there, but I think it's time we got the lads to move to Niamey.

Posted: Wed Jun 01, 2016 3:59 pm

^^^Yeah, it's pretty obvious that they are gay and happy to stay in the closet.

Posted: Wed Jun 01, 2016 8:25 pm

As part of the process, I would tell them you need a picture of the two of them with the orphans. That will put a spanner in the works for them, then you tell them because they cannot prvide the necessary modality, they will have to travel to pick up their dollar.

Baiting Guru Joined: 19 Sep 2013 Posts: 2210

Niamey will come in good time(hopefully). I had little doubt that neither lad would be willing to travel for a while after their miserable safari to Maiduguri. This is them getting a bit of a "rest." Soon they will start on the paperwork and I can assure you it will keep them good and busy...

Dan writes to confirm whether $40,000 is really enough:

Quote:

Hello Brother Eric,

I am confuse. Don't you think $57,000 is a more fair offer than $40,000? After all that you have been through I think it would maybe be at least worth asking Mr. Barnett if they would consider it. After all they have done to us and poor Betty I am just so mad at them right now!

But if you think $40,000 is fair then I will write to Mr. Malone and ask him to write to Mr. Barnett and say that the $40,000 is enough as long as they also deliver the package to you also. Where is the package now? Have they even said when you would be getting it delivered finally?

Every day that passes Betty is in worse health! I want this to get sorted amicably as soon as possible! Have you completed the paperwork needed to collect the reimbursement yet? I am so worried about Betty. The doctor weighed her yesterday and said she only weighs 62 pounds! She needs a miracle that only you and Franklin can provide! Please do everything that you can by Brothers!

Regards, Dan

Posted: Thu Jun 02, 2016 4:07 am

Roger realizes that Dan rejected the offer, and wants more details of the lads' travails:

Quote:

I am confuse by your email. Are you saying that Mr Dan Hamilton has objected our offer, and now he is demanding $57,000.00 dollars as compensation in stead? I will have to go back to Mr Hilts in the finance department to find out if we are notarized to make that change in the compensation. Please be patience while we check up on that for you.

I am also confuse about saying that you don't have sex with each other in Ghana. Are you saying that nobody in Ghana is having sex at all? Then how are their so many orphans? I think I must be misunderstanding what you are saying, because that does not make any sense.

One more thing, you mentioned in your last email that you were requesting this compensation for your hardship, but I thought it was for the loss of the package based on what Mr Dennis Rodman told me. But I was just reading threw your file again, and I noticed that we did not discuss your hardships very much, and we didn't factorize that into the compensation offer. I think we may be able to approbate your request for compensation of $57,000.00 dollars if you can provide us with more details of your hardships. Can you please do that, so I can bring that information to the finance department?

Hopefully that will get him to retell the story of how Mr L sent them to Korhogo and Maiduguri. Roger will have plenty of follow up questions, of course. We wouldn't want to miss any important details. Twisted Evil

Baiting Guru Joined: 19 Sep 2013 Posts: 2210

I'm putting together a form with a few simple questions (i.e. many, many questions) for Eric and Franklin to submit to GPS. If anyone has ideas for some good questions to include feel free to submit them here or send me a PM.

I want to make a nice word document for them to fill out by hand and submit to the complaints dept... any question is good as long as they relate to the package, the two safaris and the hardships they endured. The more the merrier. Very Happy

Posted: Thu Jun 02, 2016 5:16 am

Has the package been misplaced to any of the following countries:
(List places our lads went to plus a few other locations)

If yes, an additional health and safety form must be filled out due to the new
Airborne Nausea Actin Leukaemia (ANAL) Virus appearing in the area.

Elite Baiter Joined: 28 Mar 2015 Posts: 1916

Don't forget Little Mr Franklin's tapeworm.

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