The Eric & Franklin Saga (Hilts/UZUMBO chop page 24)

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Baiting Guru Joined: 19 Sep 2013 Posts: 2210

56-day Cote d'Ivoire safari > https://forum.419eater.com/forum/viewtopic.php?t=272042&postdays=0&postorder=asc&start=0

40-day Nigeria safari > https://forum.419eater.com/forum/viewtopic.php?t=274434

Now that Eric & Franklin are home, it's time to help them collect reimbursement funds for their troubles these past months...

Quote:

And a good day to you sir!

My name is Dennis Rodman, I am the CEO of GPS ... Company, currently stationed in Niamey, Niger.

I was given your email by Mr. Moses Malone. Am I speaking with Mr. Franklin Obi?

It has come to my attention that a Mr. Moses Malone has been attempting to deliver a parcel to you for some time now, many months to be exact.

This is the first I am hearing of this, but from what he has told me I must offer you my sincerest of sincere apologies for the harshness of conditions you have been put through. Mr. Malone is being dealt with accordingly. This poor customer service will not stand!

Please sir, if you would oblige me by giving me more details about this recent delivery attempt. Why were you unable to collect the parcel in Bouake as originally intended back in January. Am very confuse by what I heard from Mr. Malone, but I would like to hear the entire story directly from the buffalo's mouth, so to speak.

I await your response in regards to my inquiries of this matter of the utmost importantness.

Franklin tells Rodman about his Korhogo experience:

Quote:

Hello Mr. Rodman,
Thanks for your mail and I'm very sorry for the late response. I am so glad to hear from you, my name is Mr Franklin Obi and my partner is Mr Eric. I am writing to inform you what we passed through on our parcel since January, because of the wrong delivery of our package. On the 24th of December 2015. Mr Moses Malone contacted us through our e-mail address that our parcel has been delivered to my nearest pickup facility located in Bouake, Cote d'Ivoire and it was available to pickup during regular business hours before their offices will be closed in observance of the Christmas holiday on the 25th and will be resume on the 28th December.

To be honest, we cannot traveled to pickup the package, because of the Christmas holiday and I wrote back to Mr Moses Malone after the relaxation days that our parcel supposed to be delivered in Accra Ghana and we are waiting for the GPS to resend the parcel to Ghana, which was on the shipping receipt and he responded back to me that GPS doesn't have shipping facility in Ghana, that we need to come to Bouake Cote d'Ivorie to collect the parcel, because it was sent insured and we need to sign for the parcel. I contacted brother Dan Hamilton that the package was delivered to Côte d' Ivorie instead of Ghana, but they shouldn't worried about the wrong delivery that we are going to travel to Côte d'Ivorie by route to bring the package back to Ghana.

Following the direction Mr Moses Malone the GPS Regional Manager directed us and we arrived in Bouake, Côte d'Ivorie. The following morning we contacted Mr Moses Malone that we have arrived in Côte d'Ivoire and we cannot locate the address he gave us. We went back to the bus station and wrote an email to him that we are currently at the UTB bus station. He responded back that our parcel is at the GPS Head office in Korhogo northern part of Cote d Ivoire that we should enter bus at the UTB bus station and come to Korhrogo. We don't have any option to get the package, we went to Korhrogo to pickup the package as he directed us.

We arrived in Korhrogo safely and start asking the local people in Korhrogo that we are looking for the GPS office at 310 Rue B Korhogo, nobody can gave us a specific address to locate the GPS company. We started frustrating in Korhogo, because of the wrong address he gave to us. He advise both of us to stand at a popular place and snapped photo
that he will send the GPS driver to come and pick us where we are with the company van. We are hanging on the street waiting for the drivers he sent to come and pick us for over 3-4 days, we couldn't understand exactly what is happening .

Mr Moses Malone was also confused what is going on and he sent our cell phone number to the GPS headquarter in the United States to connect us and driver on conference call for them to understand what is happening, before the drivers banged the phone without knowing that the call is on conference call and we don't know that they planned to steal our package with company van and run away.

The next morning we received a mail from Mr Moses Malone that Mali police contacted him late night to come to Bamako Mali that they found the GPS company van along the street with their two driver Mr Bahbango and Mr Randy, before he noticed that the two drivers he gave our package planned to steal the package with company van. We are stranded
there in Korhrogo and be waiting for Mr Moses Malone to bring the package back to Korhrogo Côte d'Ivorie over months, but he gave us reasons why he is delaying that he took the company van to repairer shop and other problems he was facing over there.

We don't know how a group of boys in Cote d'Ivorie, which we don't know got information of the contents inside the boxes and planned evil to kill us and steal the package from us by force. I wrote a letter to Mr Moses Malone and attached brother Dan Hamilton e-mail address to contact him, so that he will understand the right people that he sent the package to and he contacted brother Dan to confirmed what we are saying and brother Dan and his wife sister Betty bring an idea for
both us to stand with a paper written that WE ARE STRANDED IN KORHOGO and snapped picture of ourselves and send to him to understand that we are the right owner of the package, we did as they directed us to do.

We are frustrating in Korhrogo before my parent contacted me to come back home if the company are not given us good service and I cannot go back home and leave my partner Mr Eric in Korhrogo, because my name was on the shipment receipt. The next few days my younger sister contacted me that my father collapsed and he died in a heart attack where he was thinking of what is happening to me because am the only son of my late father.

I told Mr Moses Malone that we cannot wait any longer since we don't understand what is happening, before we travel back to Ghana. We arrived safety after we spent 3 months in Cote d Ivoire we went for the package. He wrote an email and apologized for what has happened in the past that the GPS headquarter in the Untied State has approved to reimbursed us all our expenses in our failed trips.

Kindly open the attached sworn statement we forwarded to the GPS headquarter in the States and you know more things that we passed through because of the wrong delivery, the GPS requested us to write the sworn statement and singed before they will reimbursed us the money we spent and Mr Moses Malone was aware of what we are
passed through.

Hope to hear from you soonest.

Regards

Mr Franklin

He attaches the shipping receipt, a scan of his ID, and the 6-page singed sworn statement.

Quote:

And a good day Mr Franklin!

This is all the first I am hearing of this! It appears that Mr. Moses Malone had you go through the reimbursement process through the US office, but not through the official processes required through the Customer Compliants Department. So approval of your $8,280 was not officially processed through the proper channels. Mr. Malone is an incompetent fool and I have demoted him to the lowest position in our company. I am furious with how all this has happened to you.

I am still a bit confuse about something though? You explained in good detail what happened in Korhogo, and I thank you for that. However, I am wondering why you later went to our Maiduguri office when Mr. Malone was at the Abuja office? Can you please explain what happened in Nigeria? And how long were you there?

I have contacted the GPS Customer Complaints Department and personally spoke with a man named Roger B. I have instructed him to work with you personally to complete the reimbursement case regarding your payment. I have instructed him to make this his top priority! If it is true that you also traveled to Maiduguri and were unable to collect the package then you are eligible for additional funds.

Once you have fully completed the report with the help of Roger, the report will be submitted to our Board of Directors for final approval of your reimbursement funds. Please be looking for his email very soon

With Roger's help, our boys should finally be approved to collect their reimbursement...

Minor mod edit to obfuscate GPS business name - JF

Posted: Sat May 14, 2016 11:49 pm

Another chapter! Yea.

Posted: Sun May 15, 2016 1:05 am

That is a thing of beauty. Lovely to see your lads are still on the hook.

Posted: Sun May 15, 2016 1:30 am

I hope these lads appreciate how fortunate they are to have someone competent handling their case now. Twisted Evil

Posted: Sun May 15, 2016 1:43 am

I think they're getting off rather easy here so far. I really hope that Roger puts them through the wringer somehow.

Posted: Sun May 15, 2016 9:52 am

Quote:

The Reimbursement Process

Yeah...right! Cool

Master of Master Baiters Joined: 21 Nov 2008 Posts: 619

I love it when a lad tells the detailed story of his safaris.

I also like his phrase: "We started frustrating in Korhogo", kind of a different usage of the word, as if it's a thing a person does. Eating, walking, frustrating...

Master of Master Baiters Joined: 24 Dec 2012 Posts: 699

^^ in their case it is true and it should indeed be a verb

Posted: Sun May 15, 2016 5:46 pm

I'm assuming that the very thorough Roger will have them singing a lot of sworn statements. I look forward to seeing them frustrating a lot more Very Happy

Baiting Guru Joined: 19 Sep 2013 Posts: 2210

It's been a while since UZUMBO checked in. Might as well keep some pressure on him...

Quote:

GOOD DAY BRODA!!

DON THINK WE HAV FORGOT ABOUT U OK?? WE NO U NEVER COLLECT PACKAG AN U CONTINUE TO DISRESPECT BOSSMAN KOFI HE TAK U AS PERSONAL INSULT TO HIM OK?? WE HAV DIRECT ORDER TO FIND U NOW IN KORHOGO JOS MADUGURI ACCRA WHEREVER U LOCATE OK?? HE TELL DIKEMBE HE CAN KEEP LITTLE FRANKLINS FINGERS BUT ERIC AN FRANKLIN HEAD BELONG TO HIM TO PUT ON DESK AN DECARATE HIS OFFICE OK???

UZUMBO U KNOW!!

Posted: Sun May 15, 2016 8:24 pm

Quote:

UZUMBO U KNOW!!

That always cracks me up. Laughing

How about "UZUMBO WHO SINGED A SWORN STATEMENT"?

Baiting Guru Joined: 19 Sep 2013 Posts: 2210

^^Surely UZUMBO would never learn that information! If he did, it may complicate future payments... Very Happy

Eric write to Rodman and elaborates on his Nigeria adventure:

Quote:

Hello Mr Rodman,

Thanks for your kind response and your understanding in this matter, i
appreciate.

After we came back from Cote d'Ivoire to Ghana, Mr Moses Malone
contacted us that GPS head office in the United state has
approved that they will reimbursed us our expenses on our failed trips
to Côte d'Ivoire. He said that he was transferred to Abuja that we
need to come to Abuja Nigeria for the package and sign off, before he
will released the expenses we made on our failed trip to Côte
d'Ivoire.

I wrote an email to Mr Moses Malone that we wasted all the money that
we have at hand on our failed trip to Cote d Ivoire and if the GPS
will send little amount of money so that we will use it to
transport ourselves to Abuja Nigeria to pickup the package with the
money they promised to reimbursed us. He responded back that we should
borrow money from people and friends that once we arrived in Abuja to
pickup the package and sign off the paperwork that he will not
hesitate to reimbursed us and our expenses from Ghana to Abuja as they
promised.

We arrived in Abuja Nigeria on the 29th of March 2016. We couldn't
locate the address he gave to us, but we located the Nigerian Turkish
International school he mentioned that was adjacent to GPS
sorting office as he directed us.

We was confused with the address he gave to us and we went back to the
bus station and informed him that we've arrived in the school that he
mentioned in the address he gave to us that was closed to the GPS office in Abuja. He told us to stand in front of the main gate
of the bus station in Abuja and snap picture so that he can locate us
and we did as he requested, but we waited for him to come and pick us
the whole day, we didn't see him so we slept at the bus station that
night.

The next day he wrote to us that he couldn't locate the Bus station,
so we suggested for him to go to the nearest hotel around him and book
for a room in our name and send us the hotel receipt and the address
with the hotel receptionist phone number so that we can go and stay
there to be easy for him to locate us, so that we can sort out the
issues without any inconveniences. He complained that he is a
novice in Nigeria and he don't know exactly where we are, he
instructed one of GPS worker Mr Kareem to booked a hotel in our
name. But Mr Kareem told him that he has make all the necessary
arrangement and he gave us the hotel address that we should move to
the hotel and contact him once we arrived so that he will come and
meet us to sort out the issue amicably, but we went there nothing has
done and we went back to the bus station and slept again for the third
times.

We contacted Mr Malone that nobody book a room in our name and he was
mad at Mr Kareem according to his email he sent to us that he must
look for us that night and they didn't come. Mr Malone contacted us
the next morning that he will try his possible best to locate us
himself that day afternoon after he sort out few jobs he has at hand
and we waited for him the whole day but he couldn't come as he said
and we slept at the bus station again.

The next morning he contacted us that group of boys came to GPS
office with mask attacked the staffs and stole some of the customers
package, so he took our package and ran out of the city that he
suspected it must be those gangs that planned to steal the package
from him by force. He wrote an email that he arrived safety in the
city of Jos, that we should come to the University Teaching Hospital
Jos adjacent to where we can locate him for the package. We don't have
another option to get the package as he left Abuja.

We entered a bus from Abuja to the city of Jos and we located the
University Teaching hospital of Jos as he directed us and contacted
him, he replied that we should snap picture in front of the teaching
hospital, we did as he
requested. We waited for Mr Moses Malone to come and pick us the whole
day. The next day before he responded to our email that he is happy to
hear my partner Mr Eric voice on phone, but he forgot that he did not
give us his cell phone number since we came to Nigeria. So we replied
back to him that is not our voice he heard on phone, so he realized
that he did not give us any cell phone number.

He told us that Jos is not safe, because of what happened in Abuja
that he will moved to Gombe and get back to us as soon as he arrived
in the city and on his way moving to Gombe road to BIU that he watched
his mapped and realized that Maiduguri is very close from there that
the GPS has Regional office in Maiduguri, so he decided to move
there that it will be more safer.

The next day he wrote to us that he arrived in the city of Maiduguri
safely that we should come to Maiduguri to sort out the issue and we
went to the city of Gombe from Gombe to BIU, before going to
Maiduguri. We noticed that all the troubles we are facing is the wrong
addresses he gave to us that caused a lot of stresses in our trips. We
took risk from Abuja to the city of Maiduguri which is more than
844.77km.

PLEASE SEND ALL OUR REPORTS WE SENT TO YOU TO MR ROGER, SO THAT HE
WILL GET CLEAR UNDERSTANDING OF WHAT HAS HAPPENED BEFORE PROCEEDING
WITH US.(I believe Roger B. will be contacting him on Monday)

We will appreciate if the GPS can sort out this issue this week so
that we will respond to Brother Dan Hamilton to get rest of mind,
because we promised to informed them as soon as we finalized with GPS shipping company. They are waiting for us to give them good
news about the package, because his wife Betty Hamilton is seriously
ill at the hospital at the moment because of the wrong delivery and we
are scared
about that.

Your urgent cooperation will be appreciated.

Regards.

Mr Franklin.

Nothing like a good safari recap Very Happy

He also writes to Moses to warn him that UZUMBO somehow learned that he never collected the package:

Quote:

Hello Mr Malone,

How was your weekend?

I just another email now from Uzumbo that they knew that we never
receive our package yet.

Please make sure you check any email you receive well that asking
about the package that it has one(i) before you reply, because since
they knew that we never receive our package they might fudge another
thing to confuse you to get more information from you and if that
happen your CEO will not be happy with you and we don't want you to
get problem with your company.

Have good time ahead and stay blessed.

Regards.

Mr Franklin that signed a sworn statement.

I am attaching mail i received from Uzumbo below for your reference.

<snip Uzumbo email>

Baiting Guru Joined: 10 Oct 2010 Posts: 3877

^^^^

very nice emails.

just a fancy idea.

rodman could ask them for more specific details, like:

would you explain in detail how you went from ghana to abuja. and after their answer satisfied him, he can ask the next one about the trip from abuja to bio or whereever they have been.

of course, they need to describe every dirty detail in that bus station Twisted Evil

of course, that can be done for both safaries, and both of them should answer. they should spend their time writing essays for us, how miserable their journey was.

Posted: Mon May 16, 2016 3:32 am

Totally agree with Robert. This email is nice, but another singed sworn statement will be required and will have to be scrutinized by the legal department.

Also, we need Eric's signed statement too. No go without that.

Oh, and the death certificates....don't forget those.

Baiting Guru Joined: 10 Oct 2010 Posts: 3877

^^^^

a few years ago, a baiter claimed that the victim-character died. and the lad demanded a pic of the dead victim in the open coffin.

just suggesting... Twisted Evil

Posted: Mon May 16, 2016 10:41 pm

Roger at the complaints desk reaches out to Franklin:

Quote:

Am I reaching Mr Opie Franks? My name is Roger Bartlett, and I work in the customer complaints department at GPS. Mr Dennis Rodman, the CEO of the company contacted me and personally extorted me to handle your case. I have 20 years of experience here at the complaints desk, and I am sure I can help you resolve your issues.

I understand that you have had some trouble recently claiming a package that was sent to you threw our service? Can you explicate a bit more about this please? I look forward to being able to help you (descend further into madness).

The lad replied with the same novel he sent to Mr L. I was hoping he would write something original rather than just doing a copy-paste, but oh well.

Roger will be confused about several points of the story, and ask for clarification when he responds tomorrow. He may be slow, but he is very thorough.

Baiting Guru Joined: 07 Jul 2006 Posts: 5727

These lads could write a book on which bus stations to sleep at in Africa. It could be a best seller, and I'm sure someone in the travel business would be happy to publish it. Very Happy

Posted: Tue May 17, 2016 12:02 am

In fact, I think we should publish the Turd Saga, the Get Shorty Saga, The US Safari, and some other great Eater hits into a book. It's gonna be a bestseller!

Baiting Guru Joined: 19 Sep 2013 Posts: 2210

By the time he's finished this process, I hope that we will have more detail about those long bus station nights. Very Happy

He writes to Rodman expressing concern about sister Betty, attaching an email from Dan that I had sent him a few hours previous:

Quote:

Hello Mr Rodmam,

How are you doing and your family?

I am writing to inform you that brother Dan Hamilton that sent us the
package contacted us this morning that his wife sister Betty Hamilton
health condition is still serious at the hospital that she hardly wake
up this days.

He said that anytime she wakes up from the bed she will ask if we have
receive the package and if he tell her no she will start crying and
pass away. We need you to use your power as CEO of the GPS to
make sure we sort out this issue this week(not likely), so that we will have good
news to tell brother Dan Hamilton and his wife.

Your uttermost cooperation needed at this point.

Regards.

Mr Franklin Obi.

I AM ATTACHING YOU MAIL I RECEIVED FROM BROTHER DAN HAMILTON FOR YOUR REFERENCE.

--------------------

Hello Brother Eric and Franklin,

I am sorry for just now writing. I have not been at my computer for over a
week.

Betty is not improving. The last time she woke was on Wednesday. She
looked at me and just asked "the package?" I told her that you never
receive the package yet and she started crying and passed out again.

The doctors say it is just the power of God that is keeping her alive, and
perhaps they belief that the children will soon have their toys. Tell
Mr Moses Malone and their company that my wife life is in their hand,
i never have anything to tell them yet. (Franklin added in a few of the whinier parts of this email)

Any good news My Brother?

Regards, Dan Hamilton

Rodman reassures him that everything will work out, as long as he works with Roger:

Quote:

And a good day to you sir!

Please send Mr. Hamilton my personal reassurances that all of this will get sorted out with the utmost of professionalism and expediency.

You should soon hear from Mr. Roger Bartlett, I assure you that he is a trusted employee. I encourage you to work closely with him to properly complete the reimbursement process to ensure that you are properly compensated for your hardships these past many months.

I want to reemphasize that it is critically important that you work closely with Mr. Bartlett. I have instructed him to give you all that you deserve. There will be some paperwork involved with this process. Once completed, the Board of Directors will reevaluate your final reimbursement payment. I can assure you that it will be much more than the $8,280 you were already promised by Moses Malone, considering the hardships that you endured in Nigeria.

Dennis Rodman

Elite Baiter Joined: 28 Mar 2015 Posts: 1916

The lads must now be back in very high hopes. What with all the CEO's eloquent assurances and Roger's exquisitely idiosyncratic English, I'm sure they are now deeply relieved that their troubles will soon be over, huge compensation in their hot, sticky hands and, oh my, the arrival of the parcel, at last. Laughing

Wannabe Baiter Joined: 25 Mar 2013 Posts: 81

Just caught up reading through these tales of woe. This is just awesome.

When lads wrote:

God in heaven knows that we want to sort out this issue amicably without any inconveniences

they had me cracking up every time. GPS is renowned for its accurate and punctual deliveries so what inconveniences could arise? And they'll indeed get a warm and amicable greeting from the KofiBoyz should they ever meet so what else could they be asking for?

Am honoured to witness the next stage unfold live. Great job having these idiots hooked, and almost with no phone calls involved!

PS: Out of curiosity just ran the previous two threads through a word cloud generator to find out the 100 most repeated words. Only tweaks in the text have been removing "Quote" "wrote:", "Mr", "Brother" considering them noise. Didn't play much with it but lots of funny possibilities with the word arranging. "Much deliver time" "Thanks locate Maiduguri today please" "Hello GPS" "Try Korhogo"

Elite Baiter Joined: 28 Mar 2015 Posts: 1916

^^^ 'Package', eh? Who would have thought it? Laughing

Posted: Tue May 17, 2016 2:51 pm

That's hilarious, I love it. PACKAGE!!

Posted: Tue May 17, 2016 7:23 pm

These two are a package....gift wrapped and delivered here for our entertainment!
Looking forward to round three!!

Baiting Guru Joined: 19 Sep 2013 Posts: 2210

^^They are indeed. I'm hoping we can get Eric back and cooperating with us through this process. These lads really are best as a pair. I'd hate to think I somehow caused a rift in their relationship.

I'm surprised to see the words "days" and "waiting" are so small in that word cloud. Laughing

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