S.C.A.M.M.S. - A Comical Adventure!

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Posted: Sat Jan 30, 2010 4:05 am

Daddy! Daddy! Can you hear me? Daddy!
WTF ?that's hilarious! If only we could see him...

Posted: Sat Jan 30, 2010 4:18 am

It's 4am Central Togo time. All is quiet.

Oblivious finally made it to Atakpame, and is waiting in the carpark, and it would appear that Fraud-Star and her party of 7 have taken up residence in the Hotel.

Here are the latest round of calls. Many thanks to SlapHappy in recording and even paying for some calls. These scamming bastards ran my credit dry while I was helping the dopey wanker oblivious find his way around Togo at 11pm.

Sorry, the connection is really bad, and audio is terrible.

Oblivious - Part 1
Oblivious - Part 2
It's 2am - Fraud-Star must go to the carpark and look for three bald men without eyebrows

I sent these text messages to both lads, giving the other one each others numbers in Togo.

Ric Flair text message wrote:

+228-XXXX-XXX This is Fraud-Stars number call her to meet you in carpark at dawn.

So right now, one group is sleeping inside, and sleeping in the carpark is Oblivious and his party of 3.

They can't miss each other now. I also sent an email to both of them. WHAT ELSE CAN I BLOODY DO TO GET THEM TO MEET!!? It will happen... or by Thor's almighty hammer.... Very Happy

Ric Flair, wrestling Minister wrote:

Seeing as Oblivious was lost and we spent half the night Driving around Togo looking for him, I must apologise to Fraud-Star and her friends. We are 45km West on the road to Kara. We decided to sleep here for the night and come pick you both up in the morning. You will need to have each others phone numbers.

Fraud-Star - +228XXXXXXX
Oblivious - +228XXXXXXX

We lost a good evening and everything had to be postponed until tonight. I am only able to send emails from my iPhone, and my Togo number isn't working. I had to borrow my drivers phone. If you meet in the morning one of use your camera phone and send your picture standing together to my Australian Minister, Steve Austin. Send the image here: +614XXXXXXX

Thanks to Black Dog who will be playing Minister Stone Cold Steve Austin. Expect some calls and hopefully a picture of them together. Very Happy

Posted: Sat Jan 30, 2010 9:33 am

The sound is bad, but they sound worse. Very Happy

Reassure them nothing can go wrong now. Laughing

Nice baiting mate. Wink

Posted: Sat Jan 30, 2010 9:53 am

T-Minus... and counting... They are both still in Togo. Apparently Fraud-Star and crew started to go back to Lome and then....

Fraud-Star wrote:

Dear R. flair,

Thanks for your mail and message, we have received a call from Mr. Oblivious, so he has giving us a direction that as soon as we are at atakpame, we have to call Mr. Oblivious to come an pick us from the Atakpame.

Thanks
Mrs. Fraud-Star

Oblivious wrote:

Daddy, we are at Atakpame Kara Junction. Please you can send your Driver to come and pick up. I just called Fraud-Star now, and they said they are on their way coming from Lome. So i we are still waiting for them here at Atakpame Kara Junction.

Dad, we are waiting for you here.

Oblivious

So they have spoken to each other, and they are going to meet. I sent this back...

NN The Nature Boy wrote:

I have just been able to get internet connection again. This country is very unreliable service. I am sending this to both of you.

You must meet at the car park. You won't be able to miss each other. Once you meet please take a picture with your camera phones and send it to +614XXXXXXXX - My minister in Australia is updating our website and he desperately needs a picture of you together to add to the site. Also when you are both there and have met, and ready for pickup please call that number, or try my cell, which I am trying to get international roaming through an answering service. If you call the number it might redirect to me here. It's worth a try. My number is: +614XXXXXXXX - It may work.

Last night was such a mess, what with Oblivious getting lost and us driving all over Togo looking for him. I couldn't understand anything he was saying and phone lines were terrible. After we camped out on the road in the bus for the night my driver who had run out of credit and then the battery went flat. We're going to have to go back to the church and refuel and get some food. Plus I will only make one trip to come back and get you both. We have so much to organise here, so wait until you're together and send the image and then try and text or call my phone. I will send the driver immediately.

We will hold off on all celebrations until you get here. We want to make sure you both get everything you deserve.

Ric

Getting lads on safari is usually a chore. Getting lads to meet in their own country is next to impossible. Getting multiple lads to travel to another country to the same location under the guise of Wrestling Ministers in ridiculous costumes for a fictitious church event... This is giving me grey hair and I feel an ulcer...

I am far too excited. Very Happy

Not quite a Newb Joined: 21 Jan 2010 Posts: 21

This is soooo good Very Happy

And well worth your efforts!

Its funny that the first thing I had to do this morning was check up on this

Posted: Sat Jan 30, 2010 10:53 am

Nurse Nasty wrote:

Getting lads on safari is usually a chore. Getting lads to meet in their own country is next to impossible. Getting multiple lads to travel to another country to the same location under the guise of Wrestling Ministers in ridiculous costumes for a fictitious church event... This is giving me grey hair and I feel an ulcer...

NN you might need a minister to pray for you, or maybe a helpful nurse. Why not ask Oblivious and friends to form a circle and pray hard for forgiveness? If your health deteriorates you might have to abandon the whole meet and return for urgent medical care. Of course, no-one will be authorised to hand over all the goodies and everyone will have traveled for nothing. Do you think the wrestlers would be pissed enough with Oblivious that they might offer him (and friends) as a sacrifice?

I can but dream Smile

Note to self ... never play poker with NN or I might return sans gonads.

Posted: Sat Jan 30, 2010 12:38 pm

SUCCESS!!!

Lads meet!!! The goose has laid the golden egg! Woo hoo... Very Happy

I just received a call from Fraud-Star to my bait phone. I asked if they were all there, they said 'yes'. They confirmed they have met up with the Ghanaian contingent and are all waiting in the car park at Hotel Miva. To prove it I asked they put Oblivious on the phone and he was definitely there!!! I asked if they had a camera phone, they do but it's Oblivious and his battery is flat. Rolling Eyes

I told them I would be 45mins - 1 hour before I arrive.

I then check my emails and this:

Quote:

Daddy,

We have met; and as i write you, we are all together now in the Hotel Miva. So please we are waiting for you now.

Oblivious.

I wish I could record on this stupid old phone, but noooooooo...

No what? They've done everything I've asked. Do I call back and tell them my Nigerian Minister was curious about these people and I showed him their formats and he confirmed they are scammers? Or, shall I have a terrible accident?

Unfortunately I am dead out of credit, so if anyone is on skype and wishes to play a part, I am keen for suggestions and for you to make the call. You'll have to stick to script, and a character, but I am sure we could have some interactive fun.

Posted: Sat Jan 30, 2010 12:46 pm

Yeah!

Posted: Sat Jan 30, 2010 1:27 pm

well done. baiting at its very best. Very Happy

Trophy Videos · Posted: Sat Jan 30, 2010 1:37 pm

I'm awake, NN. I'll play telephone games! Very Happy

Posted: Sat Jan 30, 2010 1:51 pm

That's some brilliant problem solving NN, getting the lads to give each other rides. Get that phone charged up Oblivious, we want the pictorial!

Comic superhero lad wrote:

Dear R. flair,

Thanks for your mail and message, we have received a call from Mr. Oblivious, so he has giving us a direction that as soon as we are at atakpame, we have to call Mr. Oblivious to come an pick us from the Atakpame.

Thanks
Mrs. Fraud-Star

This is by far the most hilarious ladmail I've ever read!

Posted: Sat Jan 30, 2010 2:02 pm

It's time to wrestle. Very Happy

Baiting Guru Joined: 07 Jul 2006 Posts: 5727

Nicely done!

Don't burn them. I think they've still got a whole lot of play left in them. I vote for the terrible accident. Very Happy

Posted: Sat Jan 30, 2010 2:29 pm

Hey NN

Check you PM's

How about you have a suspected heart attack brought on by Oblivious's stupid fucking around? I'm a nurse and that used to be my specialty so I can help you with the terms ... not sure if you are a nurse or not is all:)

Anyone remember that Seinfeld episode where Kramer takes a new car salesman for a drive until they ran outta gas? Well, this is a similar situation. Never believed you (anyone) could milk this for so long but you have. Anything after this point will be pure unadulterated gold ...

I want more cos I am a hungry Doggy Evil or Very Mad

Posted: Sat Jan 30, 2010 2:31 pm

windypops wrote:

It's time to wrestle. Very Happy

Oh yes please ... I vote for a wild african revenge match ... Oblivious needs to be put in his place for causing everyone to lose out so badly don't you think? And for being a little bitch daddy wuss.

Posted: Sat Jan 30, 2010 2:52 pm

The burn has begun. I was speaking with BlackDog and decided to go with my original plan. Then the very generous SlapHappy came on skype and offered to make the call. I said to him:

NN to SlapHappy wrote:

Okay. But you have to be father Hulk Hogan.

Thank you again Slap. You made a great Hulk Hogan. The lads couldn't really hear us and after awhile they twig to what we are saying and... They did confirm they are together and shared a phone.

AUDIO--> N 'Ric Flair' N & Slap 'Hulk Hogan' Happy call the lads to confirm <<--- The second weirdest phone call I've made.

They really wanted an email, so I gave them one. For the record they aren't burnt in the traditional sense. They still think I am real and everything failed because they were busted.

NN The Nature Boy wrote:

I am with Hulk Hogan and our Nigerian Minister. He was interested on how we found you. My Nigerian minister has just told me that YOU Grace were running a scam email with me. He is calling it a 'dying widow with millions' format. He tell me that you have lied and are internet scammers. I then find out that Magnus, is also a internet scammer who thought he could trick us into making you part of our incredible faith, and to steal our money. Magnus send me fake passports, and I accused him of it once and he told me some cock and bull story about it being his brother?? I can't believe I was so blinded by your lies that I fell for your games.

I have decided that we are not coming to get you. We will be staying right here and you can walk home for betraying me and my faith. We spent so much money on all of this and now they are for nothing.

You should be ashamed of yourselves trying to scam an innocent man like me. I am very angry and demand you wrestle. Whoever is standing I shall pay $10,000 USD.

If you wish to see me in person you had better come with a good excuse. We are 45 min drive on Route Internationale towards Kara. As penance I think you should walk. The distance will give you time to think. You can't miss the church. It is pink and we have am arena out the front, with big ballons and some clowns dressed up throwing confetti.

You can think about your evil ways and lies and try to make amends, but as of right now. I am not a happy camper.

R. Flair

Let's hope they find the church... Up the road... There is no way you could miss it.

Now, does anyone have a Nigerian Minister/Scammer they would like me to blame this on?

Posted: Sat Jan 30, 2010 3:00 pm

HAHAHA... Nice work Thumbs up

Posted: Sat Jan 30, 2010 3:13 pm

HAHAHAHAHA! clapping

Hello I'm New here! Joined: 26 Jan 2010 Posts: 19

Congratulations NN & Slap, pure awesomeness! The lads are so effing thick that even the HH can't beat their "Halou? Halou?" clapping

Trophy Videos · Posted: Sat Jan 30, 2010 3:29 pm

Ric Flair asked:

Quote:

Now, does anyone have a Nigerian Minister/Scammer they would like me to blame this on?

How about Akim, The African Dream? (One half of The Twin Towers, along with Big Boss Man.) Smile

Baiting Guru Joined: 07 Jul 2006 Posts: 5727

If they'd wrestle I'd put my money on Wu-Man. It just seems to me that Oblivous would be easily distracted by shiny things in the crowd. Then again, you can't count out Fraud-Star and her Staff of Pain.

I'd love to see them wrestle. If you're gonna burn a lad, this is the way to do it!

Edit - Here's your Nigerian Minister. One Kamala - The Ugandan Giant!

Posted: Sat Jan 30, 2010 4:04 pm

How about blaming the whole mess on Apostle Obinna? He's probably the most prolific lad in recent Eater history and someone is bound to have his RL details. Laughing

Great work NN and SH. bow_down

Posted: Sat Jan 30, 2010 4:54 pm

^^^
That's a fantastic idea! I second the motion (notion) of blaming this on Apostle Obinna. He is worthy! The most recent phone number that I have for him is +233240046500.
This is amazing baiting Nurse Nasty! I went to bed last night wondering what these idiots were up to and I've just woken up and come straight to the computer for your update. I guess I'll be spending the day camped out here waiting for more breaking news!

Posted: Sat Jan 30, 2010 5:24 pm

bohigal wrote:

YOU ARE A WITCH. MAY YOU MENSURATE NON STOP TILL THE END OF YOUR LIFE

Off Topic: Just noticed this in your siggy.

Bohigal that's harsh. You must have really pissed someone off. Love it Smile

Posted: Sat Jan 30, 2010 5:56 pm

NN, you have officially ruined my life. What kind of person does this to us innocent baiters? My curiosity to see what happens next has me checking for updates constantly. I have put off doing more constructive things as this is to funny to miss. Soon I will start to forget to feed my son or forget to go to work, and it will all be because you had me fixated on this bait. Evil pure evil.

Love ya work

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