This lad is a star!!

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Posted: Tue Jan 20, 2009 5:36 pm

One day I'll publish the full bait but I've just got this and had to share it...

I've ASEM'd him, let it go on for a while, brought in a second character who is claiming to be the real Prof Soludo and that the ASEM should have gone to him and then I've mentioned that the money I am sending is for founding a Gay Rights charity in Lagos.

Incidentally, Henry is the name this lad has given my other character. He is claiming that it is a former employee turned criminal and is now trying to steal my lads identity. I have told my lad that "Henry" has found out about my secret gay life and may blackmail me and tell my wife.

Quote:

dear mr shagnasty,

i am really suprise about your scared, why must you be scared for the first place, just because of that little rate called henry, that criminal, listen let me tell
you,
had it been that you know my standerd about this business, charity, of homosexual, we are into, you will not be cared of anything, there are nobbled man, homosexual, friends like me around the world,
even here in nigerian, such as governor of abia state, called ..ojiuzo kalu and inspector general of police force and other government citizen here, who are my good friend, we started and login into homosexual the same at a certain levels, not only us such like other client from other countries in the world all of them are nobbled man, both the inspector general of police and arm forces from north land nigerian, here in nigeria first in command and his colegue are also into homoexual, and we know our selves very well , and i wish to incourage you that gradually you soon get to know them all because we are just like one friend, group of aociation, friend, group with one heart,
all this people are nobble man sitting on the government chair, with the capability of our security who can charlange you here or ask you of anything,no one, that is why i alway tell u not to be scared about that criminal, my homosexual friend here inspector general of police has given me some forces to look for him, but i promise you that i can handle him you don't have to be afraid of anything, am not alone am dealling with people in authority in the government, all of them are into homosexual and they have been doing every great thing for charity and homosexual, here. like you are about to invest now, and they will be happy to hear about you soon if our cooperation and business told further, that will connect you in the group of homosexual nobble man in authority here, for we love some one who is capable to invest in charity homoexual, here, remember that you are one of us, and because of you are with us your security is very secured already, at my level like i told you before, my security is highly powerfully and strong than they way you feel, so you don`t have to be worried, i am into this for many years ago now, there's no lickages among us, and there's no one can speak where we spoke becaue my homoexual frineds here and i are highly protected by a strong security from our nobble colegues on the government chair, so that is why i told you that criminal is just wasting his time for notting, you don't have to be afraid because you are highly protected like us here, i told you earlier about that criminal called henry, i konw he knew a little about this issue durring the time he was working with me, and he also got some little information bassed on our dicussion on mail which he use spoking to you now but his not sure of himself to live again, if inspector general of police, my friend get him arrested, he must regreat and rute in jail,don't warried i can handle him and that wouldn't make you to stop half way on this business ok, you are just doing as if you are a knew man in homosexual,ability, you are not a new man ok, rest your heart and live every thing to me, my inspector was very happy when i told him that i have colegues friend like you, as our colegues in homosexual, his the key of my security over here and abroad i also have a strong security and suporters in uk america, canada, spain and other places, his a brother to the president of nigerian, so if you are scared, i am not scared of anything the security i have is anough for us ok, about that criminal, called, hery, i knew very well that he is gay who has no level to stand and speak to any place in nigerian, besides, about your wife, he has notting to do with your wife because it is impossible to get your wife`s contact and email address, i did not told any one about that ok, it is only the secret of you and i alone. i want you to do me a favore by telling that criminal that you had send the money to me, since i knew that why he is after you is about the money which is not posible to him, his trying to but was not opportune anough to do what he want to do as a criminal, we are more than him ok, our security is very strong over here likewise you as a friend and business member fore that matter , you are secured anough with me, tell him you have send the money to me ok, you will see he can not mail you again, what his after is to get the money from us ok, hahahaa, beleived me you will see what i told you, tell him that u have send the money to me, i just want to let you know that your security about your wife contact and email is quite secured ok, and try to avoid him and stop replying his mail no matter what kind of mail he may send to you as a criminal, don't reply to him ok, he will soon be tired about his frauding ok, i love you, and if you have chance to go to the wastern union, try to send the money , bye for now and take good care of your self.
thanks,
yours friend,
mr professor soludo,

Wow - Nigeria has a lot of gay officials! I also like how he writes "hahahahah" in his emails, he does it quite a lot.

EDIT - just noticed the "i love you"! I'm going for my first Gay lad romance!

Posted: Tue Jan 20, 2009 5:38 pm

Just in...

Quote:

dear mr shagnasty, listen to another current addvice on what you will do about that criminal ok, i got this idea from inspector general of police my good friend, his also a homosexual,
he ask me to tell you to turn off that your email address you are using now and open another one, because you are using @googlemail.com that is why he gotten your information easily because through google search he can stract into your mail and know every thing we are doing your information, and that is true, so open another email on yahoo.com ok, make sure that you block the one you are uing now ok,
thanks,
professor soludo,

I'm pretty sure he thinks I'm only willing to deal with homosexuals now!

Posted: Tue Jan 20, 2009 6:41 pm

Quote:

group of homosexual nobble man

Having to clean keyboard! Laughing

So that's what they do. Often wondered.

Embarassed

Don't forget Lesbians need donations too.

Not too sure of the feminine of nobble. Any suggestions?

Razz

Posted: Tue Jan 20, 2009 6:47 pm

Yeah - and you should ask him for his advice on what to do if your wife makes sexual demands on you. Shocked

Should you just lie there and let her have her wicked way with you ?

Ask him what pron he likes.

Posted: Tue Jan 20, 2009 6:54 pm

According to this Lad most of the country is gay, I wonder how they procreate.

Elite Baiter Joined: 15 Sep 2008 Posts: 1006

Quote:

there's no lickages among us

Nothing to say.... Shocked

Posted: Tue Jan 20, 2009 10:02 pm

A little bit racy this one so avert your eyes if easily offended!

I'm playing the wife angle as suggested by Gomer....

Quote:

Dear Professor Soludo,

I hate to burden you with a personal problem but feel that we are much more than just business associates now.

We are both gay men this is true. I don't know about you but I am married as I only realised my homosexuality later in life. By then I was already married with children and therefore felt trapped as it would have done harm to my children to leave the family for another man. Instead I have had a series of secret relationships with other men behind my families and friends backs. Public toilets, bushes in parks, gentlemens clubs, shower rooms and the top deck of the 42 bus are the haunts of my sort.

My wife used to be a nurse and often worked at night, I was always working in the day so it was not very often we slept together. Now however, since she has gone back to working days I have to share a bed with her. I do not wish to be blunt Professor but my wife has a large sexual appetite.

How can I avoid having to perform the duties of a husband without hurting her feelings. I tried closing my eyes and thinking of Chuck Norris but she always asks why my eyes are shut? She asks if I think her ugly but it is not so - I see by the looks of other men that she is considered very desirable, just not to me. I prefer beards and cock.

It is horrible Professor but if I left her then I could not bear to stay in the same country as my family such would be my shame. And since I have nowhere to go I must carry on like this. Sometimes Professor I feel it would be for the best if I drove out to the coast and jumped off a cliff. At least then my suffering would be over. But this would be the cowards way out wouldn't it?

I am sorry to unload on you like this Professor but sometimes I become very dis-happy.

Warmth and Love

Shagnas Tylotto

I'll leave that one with him overnight Smile

Posted: Tue Jan 20, 2009 10:09 pm

Quote:

Public toilets, bushes in parks, gentlemens clubs, shower rooms and the top deck of the 42 bus are the haunts of my sort.

Quote:

I tried closing my eyes and thinking of Chuck Norris

Quote:

I prefer beards and cock.

Thanks for making me damn near pee myself Scooby.. Laughing

Posted: Tue Jan 20, 2009 10:12 pm

lol, can't wait for his reply... puke

Posted: Wed Jan 21, 2009 4:20 pm

My lad is sympathetic, but at the same time tells me to get a pair dammit! I am the man of the house after all Shocked

Quote:

dear, mr SHAGNASTY, i really understand how you feelled and come to think, your wife is just your wife, i my self am married man, my wife lives as my wife in another town while i live in another where i can have my privacy about my homosexual preferences, listen there's know reason to give bassed on what your saying about your wife, you and i know your wife is just a woman with cool mind, and a woman must hear the thought and respect to her husband, it has notting to do on our investment, you can comence this investement with me and still your wife can not know noting about it, you can come on here with me, then tell her you are travelling for an appointment and you will come back in a few day time like a man, that should permit you to come here and have your nice cool enjoyingment in our homosexual performance ok, know it that we are just starting, there's alot of business ahead of us to riches wich you don't know that we have to go in after this investment, but i just keep it save, i was waiting for us to finish it one after onother before you knows it, we might have been a very good bastard billioniares you and i, you will also rejoice when she heard that u have some good friend business partners in foriegn countries, at times when i visite you we discuss about business and travel out together to see our investment all around the country,
but as i am speaking to you now you wouldn't understand but you would be enjoy it very soon, too much money out of it, i don't know why you are so scared about everything and your wife, over here it is my wife have to be scared over me been as the head of the family and not me to be scared over her, inpossible ok,. please don't disapointed me, i had already done some process about it, even if you are scared about your wife then send the money to me to start investing it far, so that you will not be exposed to your wife but secretly you and i knows that the investement is yours and any time you want to come here you are free i will take you around to see and to enjoy ok, i don't think there's any complicated issue there, you are the one trying to make thing to be rong way, think like a man ok, your wife can not know anything about it, remember that as long as we are two into it, it's dificult for one to know the real ownner of it, eccept you told the person, so shall it be so dificult for your wife to know about it, because it is not in your town and your country, your wife can not know. if you have the phone line of that criminal called( henry) you can give it to me, i want to find out where he is now ok, i want you to tell me some possetive about this issue ok, i don't want any disappointment at all ok.,,
but if you don't want to countinue it on your name, then send me the money to invest it on my own name, but we still know that the investment belongs to you ok, that is how to do some, instead of doing like this, we are know longer a child, remember much money is involve out of it, i don't want us to loose this opportunity, this money that is coming out ok, your fund is too much money, don't you know. walk up mr shagnasty, i need your number to call you today, we have to talk on phone ok, so that you can understand well about all.
thanks and bye for now,
mr professor soludo.

Highlighted a few favourites there. Laughing

EDIT: Anyone got any lad numbers I should pass onto my Agony Uncle?

Not quite a Newb Joined: 12 Jan 2009 Posts: 55

Heres a few lad numbers for ya

00221 772 171 701 (love/refugee camp scammer)
+234-8073033557 ( 'security company')
+60129240564 (phony bank)

Eh I'll dig my box for more if you need any. That should be good for now. Feel free to go down the list for your 'alternate numbers' if they seem to think they have gotten the wrong number...

Posted: Wed Jan 21, 2009 6:07 pm

Have I been outed here, I'll never be the same again. Embarassed

Elite Baiter Joined: 15 Sep 2008 Posts: 1006

A few more lad numbers...please use them!

2348032548483
2348027077188
2348054459666

Posted: Wed Jan 21, 2009 9:07 pm

Too funny, Scooby, you drove me into a 3 minute coughing fit. Laughing

Trophy Videos · Posted: Thu Jan 22, 2009 12:31 am

That Chuck Norris line was my favorite, Scooby. Laughing

Here's tons of lad numbers I have collected over the past 3 weeks or so.
If anyone else wants to abuse them, feel free. Most of them are lottolads, and I hate lottolads. Smile

+2347039424559
+22678835709
+34-634-130-267
+34-634 184 321
+34-658 715 708
+228-962-59-21
+34-634-161-961
+34 663-680-388
+34 693 572 631
+31-645407295
+34-634-032-981
+228-999-4637
+34-634-033-034
+34-622450925
+34 634 032 981
+60178701635
+34 657 548 514
+233 247219258
+22501325875
+226 75245017
+228 9369625
+60122473440
+234 80 238 66 761
+33-636-280-846
+234-80-51155441
+2348069359014
+234-802-530-0725
+34-693-570-599
+225 07433188

Posted: Fri Jan 23, 2009 5:56 pm

A bit more stuff...

I'm not happy with a Western Onion payment so got onto him about a bank alan. Did I say Alan? I meant account of course Wink

Quote:

Dear Professor Soludo,

Thankyou for your reassurances about Western Union. I am still worried though and went to ask at my local WU branch here in town. They said that there is a lot of fraud in Western Union in Africa and that I should not send money to people who I have not met in person.

They also said that this fraudster will easily be able to take the money as the Western Union staff in Africa are easily bribed and a lot of them work for local gang stars. They said that Henry may already have a friend in Guinea who has made a false ID with your drivers name and is just waiting for the money to be sent. He will then be informed by a corrupt official in Western Union to come and get the money!

I would much prefer a bank transfer Professor. I asked at my local bank and they said this was possible to send the money to any bank account with a valid SWIFT code.

Also, you asked if I had a phone number that Henry has given me. He gave me two numbers.

2348032548483 and 2348027077188.

Man Love,

Shagnas Tylotto.

Lads got back to me.

Quote:

dear mr shagnasty, how are you doing,well i just discovered your reply right now, bassed on your idea, i wish to say you are real right because it's possible for a wastern union worker to receive a bribe from a fraustar to have the money expecially now that henry is after us,
i wish to appreciate you of your good idea of using a bank account,that is more nice and very secured, PLEASE HANDLE THIS ACCOUNT HERE VERY WELL DON'T EXPOSE IT TO ANY ONE OK, IT IS A REAL FUNTIONING ACCOUNT WITH A LOT OF MONEY INSIDE, MONEY INSIDE IT BELONGS TO MY GROUP OF UNION ASOCIATIONS , PLS I DON'T WANT U TO GIVE THIS ACCOUNT TO ANY ONE ELSE OK, ONLY YOU ALONE, SEND THE MONEY IT THEN YOU CAN CALL ME WITH THE NUMBER I GIVE YOU BELOW OR MAIL ME AS USUAL OK,
HERE IS IT...

(snip!)

PLEASE HANDLE THISACCOUNT WITH CARE OK,
I LOVE YOU,
THANKS
MAN LOVE
YOURS FRIEND,
PROFESSOR.

The bank info I got was a bit messy and couldn't really be checked before sending on to Alan. I got back to him to press for more details and tell him more about my personal life.

Quote:

Dear Professor,

I am glad that we can use a bank transfer my sweet. The information you gave me is a little jumbled however and I was a little unsure how to present it to my banker. It is best if you give me the information like this...

NAME OF ACCOUNT HOLDER
NAME OF BANK
ACCOUNT NUMBER
Also needed is the BIC or SWIFT CODE.

I will be able to transfer my sizeable donation once I have this information.

I have also told my wife of my desire to leave her due to my homosexualness as you said. I was surprised by how calm she was. She said she had suspected this for a long time as she had discovered my collection of gay porn and Enrique Iglesias music collection.

She said that she is glad I had finally told her and that my happiness is more important than our staying together now that our children, Violetta and Eggbert, are grown up. We have agreed to seperate for now but will not be divorcing just yet - we both wish to adjust to this before getting involved in any legal matters.

I look forward to hearing from you my gaylord inspiration.

ManLove,

Shagnas Tylotto

Posted: Mon Jan 26, 2009 6:37 pm

He's glad I've come out to the missus....

Quote:

your happiness is my happiness, i love you. professor.
dear mr shagnasty,
i am very happy for you now ,i mean you really had a good wife, because i was afraid how your going to tell your wife about these, but you really won the battle your self, you know woman are somuch jelousy and not every woman can accept or take this information from you and that is what makes her a good woman for her to understand your feelling and also need your happiness, since your children are grown up, i dont think theres something you need again from her only to take care of your children when they need you as there father, that is all, congratulation, for this worth a big celebration friend, it is not easy, not every one can take the heart tó let her wife know about this, love you and am sure you had won it all, am happy for you now, wowow, that is nice.
about the bank details, the only one not with me is the swift code which i have to get from the bank on monday, then i give it to you if its possible for them to give it to me,
thanks. i love
man love,
friend,
professor soludo.

That touching moment over, he submitted proper bank info to me, passed on of course. I need to delay payment now though while @l@n does his stuff. My first thought was a death in the family but this lad deserves a something a bit more special. Any ideas?

Posted: Mon Jan 26, 2009 7:48 pm

Hey Scooby,

Just tell him that the bank has been closed while the police are conducting a robbery/embezzlement investigation.

Or perhaps it was time for the Banking Commission to do their yearly audit of your bank's accounting department.

*edit*

OHHHH you could tell him that you came out of the closet to your kids and they were PISSED. Tell your lad that you are suicidal due to the horrible things your children called you etc! Very Happy

Posted: Mon Jan 26, 2009 8:01 pm

Lovely baiting ScoobyDon't

Getting some insanity into a bait makes it so much more interesting.

You should ask him for a picture now you're getting so close and starting to get feelings for him. Very Happy

Send him yours first to show how honest you are. Wink

Nothing too extraordinary.

From the UK TV show 'Little Britain'.

Posted: Mon Jan 26, 2009 8:04 pm

ScoobyDon't wrote:

Any ideas?

does your character actually want to be a woman? many options there (boobs, gender reassignment) but first you should really talk to your doctor about managing your hormones.

what else are you going to do with all of the money?

Posted: Tue Jan 27, 2009 6:10 pm

I've gone with breaking the news to the kids not working out too well. Means I can stay in touch but have an excuse not to visit the bank. I get a feeling it may be a long stay in hospital though....

Quote:

FAO : PROFESSOR SOLUSO,

Dear Professor,

You may not know me but my name is Henrietta Tylotto. I am the wife of Shagnas Tylotto whom I believe you have been in business with.

Unfortunately, my husband was involved in an argument with our son Eggbert over a personal matter. The argument escalated somewhat and resulted in physical violence. As a result of this my husband has been hospitalised with cranial disharmony. Although his injuries are not life threatening it will take some time for him to recover.

He has asked me to contact you and let you know that he wishes to resume your business as soon as possible. He passes on his sincerest apologies and much manlove. I will take a laptop computer in to him in the next couple of days so that he may get in touch personally.

Regards,

Henrietta Tylotto

Posted: Tue Jan 27, 2009 7:36 pm

@Scooby

Nice! You told your kid about your gayness and that brat took a baseball bat (or cricket bat I guess) to your cranium! Laughing

Trophy Videos · Posted: Wed Jan 28, 2009 1:37 am

Hilarious stuff, Scooby. This is a good one. Laughing

Posted: Wed Jan 28, 2009 3:17 am

And don't forget, once your guy's out of the hospital, you can have the jealous boyfriend (your guy's SURELY a fast mover after all) blast his overseas competition, plus he could introduce his newfound gay friends to what's surely the biggest business opportunity of all time Rolling Eyes

thus allowing extra baits if this one blows out

Oh and I've always had a soft spot for "the only gay in the village" ... Thanks Mr Pyle, it made going to work in 105*f heat worthwhile

Posted: Wed Jan 28, 2009 5:31 pm

I liked internationalchrysis's idea of a bit of competition for the Professor so I've introduced a Chinese nurse into the story.

Quote:

Dear Professor,

I am so glad to be able to be back in touch with you.Henrietta was kind enough to get hold of a laptop for me to use so that I may keep in contact during my stay in hospital.

I cannot believe what has happened! To think my young Eggbert could do this to me. Just because I enjoy the intimate company of other men. He took a cricket bat to me Professor! He was swinging like WG Grace, fierce of eye and sweaty of beard!

The nightmares I am having are frightful. Thankfully though there is a male nurse here who has been looking after me with amazing dedication. He is from a Chinese family, his name is Fo Wann Ny Yin. Everytime I wake from my nightmares he is at my bedside, tenderly bathing my sweaty body with a cloth. Even when I am not having nightmares he seems more than eager to give me a wipe down. Such dedication!

The doctors are still running tests on my head and as a result of the beating I am swollen all over. Even Fo Wann Ny Yin has said he has never before handled such swelling. He is a very good nurse though Professor, when he is finished with me some of my swelling seems to disappear immediately and sleep comes so much easier to me.

As soon as I am fit and well I am more than willing to continue with our work. Please accept my apologies for the delays.

ManLove,

Shagnas Tylotto