The Lion Sleeps Tonight - Safari, Ghana to Benin

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Posted: Tue Jun 24, 2008 11:32 am

The setting up of a safari for a lad in Ghana to Cotonou, Benin (2 border crossings) so he can go and buy... LIONS!

Dramatis Personae
Ethel Miggins (me) - UK Slightly Shady Businessman
Tony Harrison (me) - Game reserve owner
Mauris - Original Scammer
Bola Thompson - Mauris' friend and wannabe businessman

Mauris originally wrote to me with a bog standard “My father was executed by rebels and I need a foreign partner to help me get my money and will give you 40%” scam. I wrote this back to him.

Quote:

Hello Marius

Thank you for your email. I would like to help you but I think the only way that could happen is if you were to join my business as a business partner. Can you let me know what your business expertise is please, particularly in the area of commercial buying, as I am in need of a buyer in West Africa and it would seem that working together could be to our mutual benefit.

Kind regards

He goes of script straight away.

Quote:

Dear Ethel,
Thanks for your mail to me. Can you tell me what you have tpo sell so that I can search for a ready market for you.
I wiat to hear.
Regards,
Mauris

Quote:

Hello Mauris,

Thank you for your prompt response. Rather than selling what I need in West Africa is a buyer, particularly in the area of African artefacts and exotic animals. My business is that I am a specialist in sourcing goods and services for very wealthy individuals who want very special things but do not want questions asked. For example a client of mine wanted two female zebra for his private estate recently and I got them for him (via a contact in South Africa), another wanted a particular kind of large diamond and was not fussy where it came from, I got that for them too.

As you can imagine this is a very lucrative business and my company made profits of over £5 million last year. Unfortunately I have been without a reliable contact in West Africa since February this year as my previous contact was severely injured in a road accident near Lagos, Nigeria. However to give you an idea he made almost £200,000 pounds (400,000 US dollars) last year in commissions and bonuses and travelled first-class to many countries and only worked for me 2 or 3 days a week.

What I would need you to do is to be my "eyes and ears" in Africa, contacting sellers of exotic goods, finding new sources of such goods and cultivating a business relationship with them, and arranging purchases and shipments. Of course I will provide you with all the necessary funds to make the purchases with. In order to work with me you will need an international passport (as travel to other countries will be involved) and you will need to open a bank account so I can transfer money to you and get yourself a mobile phone so I can call you.

Does this sound of interest to you? If so please get back to me as soon as you are able.

Kind regards

Interested… you bet he is! He even started writing his emails in Comic Sans.

Quote:

Dear Ethel Miggins,

Thanks for your mail to me. I am really glad that you have offered me this transaction on a platter of Gold. I will do my best to source for whatever you want me to source for you here in West Africa and Africa at large.

I have discussed this business transaction with a more matured Christian brother who can readily help you out in whatever you want him to do for you anywhere in Africa. He is widely travelled and has a passport, mobile phone and bank account that you can use in the process of this business.

His name is : Mr. Bola Thomson Akinsipe, he is an Engineer by training but now he is into private business consultancy. I am damn sure that he will be of help to you and he will be a good resource material since he has a good communication and business skill.

You can write him or better still, give me the permission that i tell him to write you and he will surely do so.

His details is as follows; Mr. Bola Thomson Akinsipe
Telephone number: +233 24 2036 590
E-mail: [email protected]

Please feel free to write him at anytime or call him, he answers his telephone 24hrs and by himself too.

Please do your best to make sure that you get in touch with me too with your telephone number so that I can also call you and hear the voice of the person who wants to help us out.

Thanks for been there. I wait to hear from you.

Regards,

Mauris Jenkins

Quote:

Dear Mauris,

Thank you for your reply and the contents are well noted. I am more than happy to work with you both as partners. Please do pass on my details to Mr Akinsipe and ask him to contact me with his full details. It would be very useful if I could have a scan of both your passports or other identity documents (ID card, etc) for my company records.

Do either of you have a bank account? I know normally that money tends to get sent around Africa by Western Union and Moneygram and this is fine for small payments but I will need to transfer quite large amounts of money to you for purchases and these services charge too much so you will need to get a bank account that can receieve payments in US Dollars. Euros or Sterling.

Please feel free to give me a call on {my baiting phone} - leave a message if I can't get to the phone.

Looking forward to hearing from you soon.

Hey if the lads can ask for passports…

And enter Bola… I think maybe he is Marius’ oga (boss) as his English is better.

Quote:

Dear Ethel Miggins,
I am so happy to write you this mail. I got your information form my little friend/ brother Mr. Mauris Jenkins and he has told me and showed me so much about what you have been talking to him.
I am very ready to work with you so far what we will be doing is legal and will not go beyond the legal. I have a good business acumen and I can travel within short notices in and around Ghana.
As you will see from my passport, I am a Nigerian with a legal residence permit to stay in Ghana. That is to say that I carry a Nigerian passport with a Ghana Residence Permit. I can do business within and around Africa.
As regards, a bank account, here in Ghana, I have a savings account but because of this transaction, I will have a dollar account opened so that I can use it in receiving funds from you. In case money has to be sent to Nigeria, I have a Dollar, Euros and Pounds Sterling Account already set up there which I can use in receiving funds there.
I will tell you more about my self as time goes on. When you receive the scanned copy of my passport, can you please send me yours for reference sake.
I wait to hear from you without delay. I will always pass all information received from you across to Mauris at each and every particular time.
Check your voice mail, I left a message for you there.
Regards,
Akinsipe Bola Thomson

And we start to introduce the idea that something furry is going to enter the bait.

Quote:

Hello Mr Thompson

Thanks for your email and for getting in touch with me. Unfortunately you didn't seem to attach your ID to the email you sent - could you send it again please.

Firstly let me assure you that I will not, under any circumstances, ask you to do anything that would break the law. I am as you are a reputable businessman with a reputation to protect. Indeed if you feel uncomfortable about anything at any time please let me know.

However with that said, as I explained to your brother, people use my company's services to obtain items that are not normally available through regular channels and which, while strictly speaking are not illegal, may be of questionable morality; my business principles are never to ask the client why he needs an item, that is not my place to do. Again however if anything I ask you to do causes you any distress please let me know at the earliest opportunity.

Your bank accounts in Nigeria sound as though they will be adequate to the task; can I ask you how quickly you would be able to access the money (in cash) from this account? The sums involve will normally be in the $5.000 to $10.000 range but could be higher.

As to salary this position is on a normal commission basis of 10% of the profit on each trade. So for example if I charge someone $10,000 dollars for a item and you are able to buy it for $6000 you would get 10% of the $4000 profit (i.e. $400) plus any expenses you incurred. This is for normal stuff but if the item is particularly valuable or hard to source then the commission will be higher and we'll negotiate this on an item by item basis.

I may have a job for you very shortly as I have a Russian client who is seeking certain exotic animals for a private pleasure park he is having built. I have 2 sellers lined up but need someone "on the ground" to perform the final negotiations, make payment and make sure everything goes smoothly. Would you be able to travel to Benin in the next three weeks or so?

I look forward to hearing from you soon.

Kind regards

Will he safari? Will he send his passport… yep!

Quote:

Dear Ethel,
Thanks for your mail. I am so glad to read from you. I am currently in Nigeria for a business meeting but will be back in Ghana on Thursday before 4pm GMT.
As regards my passport, I will have it attached here with this mail. I quite understtod the modus operandi of this business of yours (Ours). We dont need to ask what our clients wants to do with whatever they are requesting. This is good as I will be here to get all that they want and it is found here in West Africa and even in other parts of Africa as I have stayed over a year in North Africa ( Libya to be precise) so I know how business is been done in that area of Africa too.
The account in Nigeria is quite good but I will have another foreign currency account opened in Ghana on Friday. I will prefer the Ghana account since I stay there more than any other place. If we need an item in Nigeria, money should be sent to the Nigeria account and if needed in Ghana or around Ghana, then should be sent to Ghana.
In addition to the above, I will be able to travel to Benin( Cotonou) in Three weeks or there about. Please fill me in on what we might need to source there while I wait to hear from you.
I have tried calling your number but it seems that it is permanently on voicemail. Do give me a more direct phone number as this will be ideal for our business relationship and transaction. For me, this number ( +233 24 2036 590) can be used anywhere around the world since I have to pay to have it on International roaming but I do have to get a local number in anywhere that I visit.
Please I will need more information from you and do send me your ID card too as I need it for my records.
I will have my passport forwarded to you from anothe e-mail as I have difficulty in downloading and re-attaching it to you from this e-mail.
Do acknowledge it when you receive it.
Thanks and God bless

I get his passport too – looks genuine!

Quote:

Hi

I'm sorry for not getting back to you sooner but I have been incredibly busy and also my phone broke (it is working again now though, feel free to call me any time).

Thanks also for sending me your passport, I have attached a scan of mine in return.

Your Libyan connections could come in very useful in the future, thank you for letting me know about them.

Now as to the Benin job, the current state of play is that I have a Russian client who is stocking a rather special private zoo with animals, the only stipulation is that the animals have to be really tame as the idea is they would mix with his guests, so no cages or anything. Sounds crazy to me but, like I said, we don't ask questions. Now I have tracked down a private game reserve in Benin in the north of the country near Kouande who has a couple of lions they have hand-reared and are willing to sell, they are looking at $4000 each but my client is paying $10,000 per animal so there is a good profit to be made here.

I need to make some arrangements but I would like you to go to Benin and ascertain for yourself if these lions are really as tame as the owners make out and, if so, to buy them for the best price you can get. To avoid problems with moving large cash sums across borders I can arrange for you to pick up the money when you are in Benin (as you probably know customs officials are suspicious of people carrying large amounts of cash). I don't imagine the whole thing would take more than 2 or 3 days.

Let me know what you think and if you would be able to take this job on for me.

Regards

I sent him my passport…

looks like the scanner ran out of electrons or something though. At this point his email account got closed down so I resent the above via Mauris’s account. He gets back to me on a new account.

Quote:

Dear Ethel,
Thanks for your mail sent to me via Mauris. I can take on the job as spelt out by you. I want you to know that I have not really handled the shipment of live animals before. All I know is that we have to have any animal to be exported quarantined and French people are not really that friendly because of their language barrier.
I will do my best. I have just returned to Ghana from Nigeria and I will be making another short trip to the Northern region of Ghana on a short business meeting with a German/American client who will be coming into the country but in the meanwhile, I will make some contacts in Benin and I will let you know what I find out.
As regards my mail, I have it working as this is what I am using in sending you this mail.
I did not get your scan passport copy as written by you in your mail to me.Please resend.
Thanks.
Akinsipe Bola Thomson

“French people are not really that friendly because of their language barrier” – that’s why I’m sending you to a country out of your comfort zone matey!

Quote:

Hi Akinsipe,

Don't worry about the French thing, I know Benin is a fracophone nation but the people you will be dealing with are all English speakers. Also the animals, if suitable, will be going to Russia and will be quarantined there, you should not need to worry too much about transporting the animals as I have connections with a specialist company who do that sort of thing; what I need you to do is go to Benin, check that the lions are tame as they say they are and then negotiate a price. Once that's done let me know and I'll get the paperwork cleared and the shipment arranged.

Were you OK with the money details I sent in the last email - as I said it's the best way to do it as it eliminates problems with transporting money across borders.

I've attached the passport scan again. (No I haven’t)

Quote:

Dear Ethel,
Sadly, I could not find your passport copy that you sent as an attachement. No, really? Please re-send it as this is very important for my records.
As regards the Benin Transaction, I am clear as regards this issue now but one thing I want you to let me know is that can I have a clear information about the Private animal keeper who I will be meeting in Benin? If there is any telephone number or contact address, it will really enhance my movement and contact with the animal keeper.
As regards the funds needed, what is the amount that you will be making available? If it is anyting between 5000 dollars and below, then I can receive it here in Ghana before I set off for my journey.
Please hear me out, if you will be sending money to Cotonou, Benin, will it possible for you to make some little funds available for me to take along on this journey as I will need some for transportation and hotel accomodation if need be.
Let me know what you feel as regards this proposal from me. I will handle your business vey well as I know that it will help me too in the long run.
How many Tamed lions will I look out for ( i.e How many does the Russin need) and what will be their age and sex?/

All these are needed. (shame you’re not going to get them mugu)
Regards,

Bola gives me a call to have a chat about lions and it’s time to introduce the man with the lionesses. Given his 5k bank limit I decide to head off any talk of transferring the money first by dangling a larger pot of gold.

Quote:

Hello Bola

Good to talk with you earlier today!

Passport was my fault, I didn't click on the right button. I've hopefully got it right this time and am sending it along with my international UN drivers licence. (I send the same mangled scan of the passport and a 2Mb file of Gaussian noise named “drivinglicence.jpg”)

The person who has the animals is called Tony Harrison, he runs a game reserve and safari experience and has done for the last 15 years so he knows what he's doing. I met him a couple of times when I worked for UNEP and he's a great guy, you'll like him As you can imagine he doesn't have a street address but there is a PO box for regular mail and there is a satellite phone but I would not call that as it is hugely expensive to place a call. He does have internet though and all our communications have been via mail, you can mail him at [email protected] which is normally the best account to get him on.

I have a picture of him with the 2 lions that we are looking to buy, both are females. As you can see they look friendly and tame.

In terms of money my Russian client is being rather coy and does not want to use normal banking channels to do this business (as I said in earlier emails, I don't ask any questions) so the plan is for a contact he has at the Russian trade mission in Cotonou to meet with you in Cotonou, Benin where this man will give you the money. The great news is that he is paying everything up front and I have got the price up to $13,500. I'm glad we did speak on the phone because hearing to you talk and your enthusiasm for business leads me to believe that I can really trust you with all this money.

However my business can't advance money for travel, I'll need you to keep receipts and send an expense claim to me, this is for tax reasons here in the UK and the authorities are really strict about it. However that said I have no problem with you dipping into the Russian's money when you get to Benin to cover your immediate expenses, just be sure you send me the receipts when you're back home so my accountant can make everything balance.

I am still finalising things but if you can be ready to travel on Wednesday that would be good. I will contact you hopfully on Monday with final details.

Regards

I attach a picture of some guy with a couple of lions I found on google images…

Anthony Harrison is, of course, me.

After our chat on the phone Bola writes back…

Quote:

Dear Ethel,
You cant imagine my thoughts before I spoke to you earlier today. I used to think that you are a female because of the name Ethel but none the less all is fine.
I am grateful to you as regards the information you gave me regarding the owner of the lions. I will be in touch with him by e-mail and subsequently, I will have to go to Cotonou to see the person that will handover the funds to me.
In addtion to the above, I did mention to you over the telephone that I will not by any means spend your funds on trivial issues and I will not by any chance inflate any bill that is incurred during the course of the journey. I am meticulous in all my dealings. This I will assure you.
Please conclude all arrangement for me to go to Cotonou on Wednesday at most Thursday. Lets get started at least. Whatever e-mail I sent to Anthony Harrison, same will be sent to you as a copy.
In the pictures you sent to me, I could see the lions and Anthony and I was able to see your UN Drivers license (lying toad… it was blank!) but there is pixel on your passport. I could not see the information contained therein clearly. All that I could see are the immigration stamps on the inner visa pages. Please, re-scan and send to me as a JPEG file.
I will be looking forward to hearing from you as regards the final arrangement that you will be making with the client. Do make sure all our arrangement is water tight.
I will call you later on Saturday .(Call away, the phone will be off)

Oddly this is the first mugu I have had that realizes Ethel is a woman’s name but that’s easily explained away

Quote:

Hello Bola,

Yes my name does confuse people sometimes, it's a short version of an old English name "Ethelred" but everyone at school used to call me "Ethel" and the name kind of stuck.

Anyway the arrangements are all falling into place. I need to know if you can be in Cotonou on THURSDAY morning (19th June). I am making arrangements for the gentleman from the Russian trade delegation, a Mr Leonid Oblimov, to meet with you at the airport to hand over the funds for the lions. Mr Harrison will also meet you at the airport that afternoon; you should know that Mr Harrison's reserve is quite remote but he has a small private plane and will take you to meet the lions in that. If all goes well you'll be back in Cotonou airport by Friday afternoon.

So, please let me know if you can travel on Thursday.

Regard

Ethel

(PS - sorry if you tried to call at the weekend but I try and keep weekends for family time so the phone would have been off)

Bola writes to Anthony Harrison

Quote:

Dear Mr. Anthony,
It is good writting to you today. I have been asked by Mr. Ethel Miggins who resides in the UK to be in contact with you as regards what we want from you.
I have been briefed by him via e-mail and telephone conversation that you have two beautiful tamed female lions in your care and we are interested in buying this animals. I want you to tell me or give me a possible way by which I can reach you there in Cotonou, Benin Republic as I am based in Accra, Ghana. I will come into Benin, as soon as I get a green light from you and a proceed sign from Mr. Ethel.
I want you to give me a simple directional map on how I can locate you there in Cotonou. I have been in Cotonou before but still, I am not familiar with the place, so a possible telephone number will be ideal for easy communication.
I will be looking forward to hearing from you as regards this transaction. In your reply, do tell me about the present state of the lions.
Regards,
Bola Thomson

When I was writing the Mr Harrison character I had a South African accent in mind…

Quote:

Dear Mr Thompson

Thanks for your email. Yah I have been in contact with Miggins in UK and he said you are his agent in Africa and that you are coming to Benin to check out Sheba and Cleo my lionesses that I have for sale. Just to let you know that they are both well and healthy and they are fully vaccinated against cat diseases. Im having to part with them as I now have three abandoned lion cubs and a cheetah that I and the wife are raising so is too much and Sheba and Cleo are a bit of a handful (but very tame and affectionate as you will see)

OK so I have emails from Miggins and he say you're coming on thursday to Cotonou. Ill come and pick you up in the Cessna as it need to go for mechanincal check anyway. So Ill meet you in airport by arrivals infomation desk 2pm Thursday. Its tiny airport so we wont miss each other and Miggins send me your picture.

There are couple of important things. I need to buy fuel and things so for weight I need to know how heavy you are so I dont overload the plane. Also *VERY IMPORTANT* do not wear anything red coloured as that upsets the lions so no red clothes OK?

See you thursday.

Tony H.

Hmmm…. What could possibly go wrong with a 40 year old C172 that’s overdue an annual check….

Quote:

Dear Mr. Tony,
Thanks for your information as regards Cleo and Sheba. I will be able to make it to the Cotonou Airport on Thursday. 2pm Thursday is an ideal time.
As regards my weight, I weigh 84kg as at this moment, I hope this will not be too much for the Cessna???
In addition to the above, can you please forward to me your picture since you have mine so that I can have it in my file.Update of my file is highly needed.
I will wear a black jean pants and dark colour two pocket shirt with a black Shoe.
I hope to see you soon.
Do send me your phone number in Cotonou.
Regards,
Bola Thomson

Just the one shoe…. You should be easy to spot.
Anyway after hob-nobbing with Tony he gets back to Ethel

Quote:

I am so happy as to your explanation regarding your beautiful name.

I will be meeting the gentleman from the Russian Trade delegation, Mr. Leonid Oblimov, this is a good idea. Will it be possible for you to let me have his telephone number as I will want to speak with him before my departure from Accra.
In addition to the above, (1)will I go with the money from the Russian Delegate to the reserve of Mr. Harrison? Please let me know.
(2) I will also want to know if the lions will be coming back to Cotonou with us or how do we arrange this set up??? (3) If it happens that the lions are according to the specifications, do I make payment to Mr. Harrison? If yes, please tell him that he has to make available a cash Sales invoice.The issue of money is very important and I will not want to make mistake as regards the handling of your funds.

I can travel on Thursday but you have to provide me the following documents between now and Wednesday. (1) A letter of representation in my name and this should be on your company letter head paper with address and above all, signed by you.
Do you know why I am demanding for this?? I undertook a business trip to the very far North of Ghana to meet with a German delegate who told my fellow business partner that he will be arriving there in a Private aircraft to sort out our business arrangement but do you know what?? He never came. My business suffered an instant loss 750 US dollars coupled with so much of stress and this kind of operation is what I dont want to experience again.
Be rest assured that I am not in anyway disputing the factual sense of this transaction but I just want to be careful about myself and also about how I spend my business money.
Please feed me back.
Regards,

Excellent – he’s been baited before. I like a challenge. I explain to him that Russian Mafiosi are not normally prone to handing out their cellphone numbers…

Hello Bola

Quote:

You are wise to be prudent in your business dealings, especially as we have never met face to face. I will get my secretary to draft a letter of introduction to you and send it to you later today.

I'm afraid that I don't have Mr Oblimov's phone number as I was never given it. My Russian client is very coy about giving out too much information but I have dealt with him before and if he says that Mr Oblimov will be there he will be (believe me that my Russian client is a very powerful man and you do not disobey him!). If I pass on your flight details he will meet you off the plane at Cotonou, show him your passport and letter of introduction and he will hand you the funds. Note that he will not be coming to see the lions with you.

To answer your other points no, the lions will not be coming back to Cotonou with you. If I get your report that the lions are heathly and friendly I will arrange for a specialist shipping company to transport them. All I need you to do is make payment for the lions and get the best price you can. Try not to pay more than 4000 for the pair but you can go as high as 5000 if you must. Make sure you get a receipt from Tony.

When you get back to Ghana pay the remaining money into your bank account and then transfer the balance, less your 10% and expenses, to me.

Hope that this all is clear, do contact me if you have any queries.

Much as I would have likes to have said “just pop the lions in the overhead luggage compartment” I think that would have blown the bait. I also send him a knocked up in MS Word “letter of introduction” (as a PDF to make it look more official and stop him using it again)

Quote:

Dear Mr. Ethel,
Thanks for your mail. I will want you to tell Mr. Oblimov to meet me at the Cotonou airport at 12 noon. Do also give him my telephone number because it will certainly work while I am in Cotonou, this is to enhance good communication link between Oblimov and my self.
For my flight details, I will be coming into Cotonou in a chartered vehicle via the road from Ghana since getting a flight to Cotonou might disturb our timing that day. so I will find my way to the airport before 12 noon when I will be meeting Mr. Oblimov at the arrival information desk.
I hope to get the letter of Introduction from your secretary.
Regards,
Bola

Oh that’s sweet… he’s going by road. That’s around 120 miles and crossing 2 borders, takes around 4 hours! Smile

Quote:

Hello Bola

Looks like everything is coming together well. You should have the letter of introduction by now.

Give me a call (or better send me an email) when you get to Cotonou so I know everything is going OK.

I've passed on your passport photo and phone to my Russian buyer and he'll be forwarding that to Mr Oblimov so there should be no problems.

Any issues, just let me know.

Regards

Well he’s got the letter from my secretary Bodil Joensen who, despite having starred in a series of farmyard porn movies in the 70s and subsequently drinking herself to death, puts in a sterling job as Ethel’s PA.

Quote:

Dear Ethel,
Yes everything is coming together. I will surely call you when I arrive Cotonou but one major problem that I can see now is that you dont pick your calls. All calls goes to voicemail.
For the letter of introduction, I have it from your PA Bodil.
Now for the pricing: I will receive the sum of 13,500 dollars from Mr. Oblimov and I will be paying 4,000 dollars each for the lions. ( In a total, I will be handing over 8,000 dollars to Mr Harrison Anthony). Please cross check and confirm
If the pair will be 4,000 or as high as 5,000 dollars, then I will act accordingly.
If there is any disparity between my calculations and yours, please advice as soon as possible.
I wait to hear from you as I am set for the journey. For your information, my forex account have been opened in Ghana. That means we have one each in Nigeria and Ghana.
Regards,
Bola Thomson

This is where I slip up as Bola is technically correct and I did say 4000 bucks each. But I write back to him:

Quote:

Hello Bola

Just to clarify the price of 4000 was for the pair of lions, not per lion.

Sorry about my phone. I have had to have it turned off for the last couple of days whilst I dealt with some business where I could not be interrupted. That's all done now so the phone should be on today and tomorrow.

Regards

Fortunately he doesn’t notice but then he rings me up and down a very poor line and goes on about check my mail and something about a VAT number. I crinkle some paper at the mouthpiece and say I’ll get back to him when the line is better.
I did say he was a smart one for a mugu, he obviously has a London contact who has quite correctly noticed that the VAT number on my “company letterhead paper” is completely fictitious.

Quote:

Dear Ethel,
I discovered that your company VAT number does not exist on the UK VAT system. Can you explain this to me???
I want the correct one if there is any mistake with the one given.
I wait to hear from you.
Regards,
Bola

Mugu smart… baiter smarter!

Quote:

Hello Bola,

Yes I was rather concerned when you rang me to tell me this as I was rather puzzled by what you meant. Apologies that the line was so bad.

When I looked into it the explanation is quite simple really. The company is registered for taxation purposes in the Channel Islands (Jersey to be precise) which uses a different type of code to the UK and, I assume, does not show up on the wider UK system because of Jersey's separate Tax and Banking laws.

I hope that clears things up for you.

Regards

For the non UK readers Jersey is an island about 50 miles from the UK, part of the Channel Islands, and is a tax haven and, as far as I know, does not have VAT (sales tax)

Quote:

Dear Ethel,
Your explanations certainly clears the air. Tomorrow is here already and I will be doing my first major work for you.
I will certainly satisfy you and your company so that we can be in permanent relationship.
Talk to you tomorrow.
Regards,

Somehow Bola, I don’t think this is going to be the start of a wonderful friendship…
At this point it all went to phone calls, some of which I will try and get off the voice mail and post as MP3s. He went to the airport and spend a fruitless four hours hanging around waiting for people who never turned up but despite talking to him and pleading for him to find an internet café as I had rearranged the meeting (email to him below) due to travel problems and I now needed him to go to Parakou (300 miles north) he turned tail and went back to Ghana.

Quote:

Hello Bola

I'm really, really sorry for all the hassle and confusion so far on
what should have been a simple trip. Here is the situation as I
understand it.

Mr Oblimov has been unexpectedly delayed in the north of Benin but is
now making his way to Parakou and will be there tomorrow morning
(Friday)

Mr Harrison's plane has a technical fault and is grounded in Parakou
waiting on a spare part which being delivered tomorrow, this is going
to take the rest of the day to install and test so it is unlikely he
will be able to fly to Cotonou to pick you up.

In the circumstances I would reccomend that you try and get the train
or bus to Parakou. I have arranged for you to meet Mr Oblimov in the
lobby of the Majestic hotel in Parakou at 11am tomorrow, this is
located in the centre of town behind the Depot Market and any taxi
driver in the town will know of it. Their phone number is (229) 23 61
34 85

Once you have the money make your way to Parakou airfield and ask for
the general aviation / maintenance hangar - Tony will be there
(probably swearing in Africaans at his aeroplane if I know him!)

Again I can only apologise for the problems. Please make sure you keep
a note of the additional expenses this is causing so you can be
properly compensated.

Kind regards

Unfortunately I didn’t get the mugu to write to me from an internet café in Cotonou but I said we would pay his travel expenses if he could show he did travel and he sent me a bill AND his passport stamps which look genuine… I can has pith hat?

I then fired him for his incompetence but he came back whining about being given a second chance so I’m going to try and set him up for Safari #2… N’Dajemma or bust! This time he’s gun running for the Chadian rebels Smile

>>EDIT - fixed passport so it can't be used