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Posted: Fri May 09, 2008 5:11 am

After a bit of back and forth with my London barrister, in the course of which I managed to get two fake National Westminster domains closed by their hosting providers, I managed to get 4 million dollars transfered to my account.

Quote:

Daer Customer,xxxxxxxx
We have finaly transfer your fund to your account in japan and we have attached your TRANSFER SLIP for your perusal and we have also procure your fund DEPOSIT CERTIFICATE and it is also attached to you for your proof.
You fund will hit your account in the next 48hours and as we have effect your transfer some second ago and we hope that you will check in your account in the next 2days from now and we have also contacted your bank in this regards.
So thanks you for your co opration and we wish you the best.

Despite the fact that they had no RSOT, they sent me the documents to prove that the transfer had taken place. The lack of said RSOT made me feel that this modality was not 100% risky free.

But it was really clever of them to contact my bank - , with a phone number of the Tokyo baseball team fan club, and the name of the star pitcher as the contact.

But then the other shoe dropped:

Quote:

Attention
We are sorry to inform you that we they BRITISH INLAND REVENUE COMMISSION, has stopped the transferring of your fund from NATWEST BANK LONDON, from reaching your Bank Account. With this order you are asked to pay the (VAT TAX CHARGES),which the fund has accumulated over a period of 5years and we have attached the STOP ORDER LETTER from your perusal. So with this order you fund has been put on hold and can not be allowed to hit your Bank Account unless you pay the TAX CHARGES of the fund accumulated.
�
We advice you to read the attached letter and comply with the instruction.
�This is the correspondent Account Informations of they BRITISH INLAND COMMISSION which the gave us to issue you were you will pay the fee charged by the commission.
BARCLAYS BANK PLC
168 FENCHURCH STREET LONDON ECCEPHP
CREDIT TO : FINANCIAL BANK
SWIFT CODE: FIBBBJBJ
A/C NO: 14752139877
BANEF: STOP EXCHANGE
So with this Account information, you are asked to pay the fee charged by the commission and make sure you send us the PAYMENT SLIP you used in paying the fee charged for endorsement and your fund will reach your account within 12hours.
Ben Phillips

And they had the documentation to prove it (actual size):

Being as smart as I am, I scented a rodent, and sent this back to the National Westminster Bank, cc to my barrister:

Quote:

Sorry, my corporate lawyer here in Japan says this is complete bullshit, and you should send the money now if you do not want your balls cut off (his words, not mine). If you want a full legal opinion, he will be happy to send it, provided you pay his legal fees in advance.

What is this stupid f***ing Financial Bank that is meant to have an account at Barclays? Please provide proof of the existence of this entity as soon as possible.

With regards,

The bank replied:

Quote:

We can not pay your legal barrister because he is not our attorney.The existence of your fund has been sent you with every documents sent to you as proof.

We are also attached the PAYMENT APPROVAL FROM THEY MINISTRY FINANCE.We have done enough for you and for the account is not our is for the British Inland Revenue Commission and the told us that their mean account is on clearance ,thats why the gave you there correspondent account were you will pay the fee to them.This is normal tax law in UK here and every bank applies it according to British Inland Revenue Commission.

You have your self to blame on this issue and they have put your fund on hold until you pay the fee to them ,so for your best advice pay the fee and get your fund allowed to hit your account in the next 12 hours.
We have issue this notice to your barrister too and we hope he will advice you on what to do and please comply to this instruction.

The barrister also came back to me:

Quote:

This is the British law and it has to take it's place. What the bank said it is true because the bank can not liar about this is.

The British Inland Commission is body that take care of tax charges and the collect tax from very deposited fund here once is been transfer to any account in the world.

So put your fund on hold until you pay your fee charged ,so my advice now is that you go ahead and pay the fee and get your fund released to your account immediately with out delay and i will make sure from my own side that everything went on smoothly to ensure the fund transfer.

Please try your best and you know how far we have gone in this transfer deal and it is almost at the end .It is a credited account in Barclay Bank and means nothing just do what the asked you to do by paying the fee to the account and get the fund released to your account at once.

Something still seemed wrong to me, so this is my latest reply to the barrister, no cc to the bank:

Quote:

Dear Barrister xxxx

I suggest you do not know anything about English (not British � Scottish law is completely different) law.

For example, there is no way that VAT would be charged on this. What would be charged is (CAT), which does not come under the purview of the Inland Commission, but under the , which forms part of the Treasury. Furthermore, such CAT is not payable under any circumstances by non-British subjects living outside the UK (see Title XII.c.iii).

If you can prove to my satisfaction that such CAT is payable, I shall be happy to pay the tax. As it is, I would suggest that someone at NatWest Bank is attempting to defraud you and me by producing documents that may seem plausible to those who know nothing of these matters, but are not at all realistic to experts in British taxation, such as myself.

The whole thing about a credited account in Barclays Bank is a load of bullshit. You really should know better than to believe these fraudsters, Barrister xxxx.

We await developments with interest (compounded monthly at 3.4%).

Posted: Fri May 09, 2008 5:49 am

You get bonus points if you can reeducate him to ask for a hilariously named tax, you know.

Posted: Fri May 09, 2008 5:51 am

You should get the Ministry of Financial Oversight (MOFO) involved.

Posted: Fri May 09, 2008 8:16 am

Would this happen to be Barrister and the "British Inland Reveune" perchance?

If so I've been baiting the same guy for 2 months as Ushas the Talking Horse. Shocked

He really is dumb as a box of rocks.

Posted: Fri May 09, 2008 8:31 am

It would indeed - but what do you mean, dumb? This guy is a positive genius compared with some of the others I have on the hook right now.

EDIT and UPDATE:

This just in, and it shows that he is now firmly off-script:

Quote:

As told me .I want to the Royal Department of Finance and Revenues office today to verify what you to told me and i understand that they knew about the fee that the Inland Commission Revenues has ordered you to pay and that the agency will share the fee and is it payable to the any transfer going out side UK and this is a deposited fund and it has an accumulated interest rate that the beneficiary must pay which is the tax of the fund.

So about the account and i told them that my client is not satisfy with account were he will pay the fee and the gave a new account for you to pay the fee.

BARCLAYS BANK PLC,1 NORTH END, CROYDON CR9 1RN,
LONDON.
ACCOUNT NAME: AJ COMPANY.
ACCOUNT NO : 20573094
SORT CODE : 20 24 64
IBAN: IBANGB94BARC20246420573094.

I will also send your receipt of your tax fee after you must have paid to the account and make sure you scan the payment slip you used in paying the fee and i will go to the office my self to present it to them ,so that the can endorse it and ask the bank to effect you to hit your account.

So go ahead and pay the fee as i told you and trust me as soon you have done that you fund will move at once .

My reply:

Quote:

Thank you for your kind attention to these matters. However, before I pay this money, I wish to see the tax demand on the official printed form from the Royal Department of Finance and Revenues, together with the specific authorization from the Ministry of Financial Oversight (MOFO), who, as you are aware, take ultimate responsibility for these matters.

I am certainly not paying money to any bank account other than one of an official UK government agency. Also, if I am to transfer money, I need the Foreign Asset Reception and Transmission code (known in the banking industry as FART) for the bank. Japanese banks will not transmit money unless the FART code is forthcoming. Also be aware that all amounts should be expressed in Japanese yen (at the time of writing, one yen is approximately equal to 200 UK pounds).

But as I have told you, CAT is not chargeable to offshore residents but the Money Offshore Unregistered Sales Excise may be, under very special circumstances. However, this is not dealt with by any of the aforementioned bodies. As a barrister, of course, you know all this already, but I thought I should remind you.

END OF EDIT

His paperwork is actually pretty good compared with some of the crap I've had in the past.

But tell me, I'm curious... How does a talking horse get named as the beneficiary of a will, and how do you sign your documents?

Baiting Guru Joined: 03 Mar 2006 Posts: 7103 Location: Yes

And don't forget the Department of Goods that will want its fair share. There's an old saying about British taxes: "Where the CAT is, the DOG will soon follow."

Posted: Fri May 09, 2008 12:52 pm

Quote:

But tell me, I'm curious... How does a talking horse get named as the beneficiary of a will, and how do you sign your documents?

For me this bait started as a �4m in a dormant account at Barclays, guess my sire must have been a really good racehorse and won lots of prizes Smile

When asked to sign stuff I claim to be suffering from a touch of laminitis so I won't be able to put my hoofprint on the document and would he mind awfully signing it on my behalf.

Mind you going down the WU office presents a few problems so at that point in the bait I normally enlist the aid of my groom (cue 2nd baiting charachter and hilarity all around as she tells Mugu of the great danger he is in because the Equine Intellegence Modification project is ultra top secret). I'm also baiting 2 lads doing similar Romance/Refugee Camp In Senegal scams with the same charachter and trying to reverse educate them into thinking "whinnies and nuzzles" is a perfectly normal way to sign off an email Wink

Posted: Fri May 09, 2008 2:03 pm

JMRazor wrote:

And don't forget the Department of Goods that will want its fair share. There's an old saying about British taxes: "Where the CAT is, the DOG will soon follow."

Not quite a DOG but there is a Money Offshore Unregistered Sales Excise. Very Happy

BTW 5 years VAT on a total of $4,000,000 @ 17.5% = $3,500,000. It's not worth all of the hassle, tell him he should pay the VAT.

Posted: Fri May 09, 2008 5:35 pm

heh VAT does NOT compound, by definition, and indeed is entirely irrelevant in this case. Bless.

Posted: Fri May 09, 2008 9:22 pm

We might be about to get a whole load of intel on this mugu. After a dolla chop on him Ushas the Intelligent horse said he no longer believed in the good barrister and terminated contact. A few days later I sent this from a new account...

Quote:

Dear ""

I doubt very much that is your name but I would like to introduce myself. I am and I am working on what we have called "The Ushas Project". We know that you have been corresponding via email with the most successful subject of the project so far who is our hannovarian stallion "Ushas". Through various genetic and nano engineering processed we have managed to increase Ushas' intelligence so that he now has an an IQ of 179.

Despite a genius level intelligence Ushas was very emotionally immature and was unable to discern deception or lies so we had to produce an experiment to allow Ushas to acquire these abilities. We were aware that he was starting to use the account of former graduate student but then you sent your mail to him which he replied to. Of course he had no idea that you were a fraudstar and that this was merely another Nigerian "419" scam so he answered you truthfully and we decided to monitor the communication between you for a while to see how things worked out.

Fortunately, due to your staggering incompetence, the experiment succeeded beyond our wildest dreams and, combined with our intervention to block the transfers that Ushas tried to make to you, Ushas began to work out that what you were telling him was all a tissue of lies; the intervention of a fellow fraudstar trying to steal your deal (that was a Nigerian graduate student who works for me playing that part incidentally) and your responses were the icing on the cake. Ushas is now fully aware of cheating, lies and deception and, despite being a bit grumpy and sulking for a couple of days, is quite well and becoming quite adept at spotting untruths.

By way of thanks the Institute has decided, even though you are a criminal, to compensate you for the many hours you must have spent tearing your hair out in frustration as each transaction was snatched away from you at the last possible moment. Accordingly we are prepared to grant you an ex-gratia payment of $3,500 (three thousand five hundred dollars) in compensation for your part in the experiment on condition that you sign a non-disclosure and confidentiality agreement not to discuss this matter with any other person.

If you are interested please write back to me at this address.

Regards

And the good barrister wrote back...

Quote:

I am interested and how do i get the fee from you.

Well my good barrister, you're going to need to make a little safari to Benin, or maybe Senegal, to get your fee Wink

Master Baiter Joined: 20 Jul 2007 Posts: 100

^^^absolutely brilliant!!! Laughing

Posted: Fri May 09, 2008 11:58 pm

Thanks for the horse update. That is really nice work..! clapping

I'm continuing to straight bait him for now (but I like the idea of a talking animal for future reference). He came back quite fast last night with this little gem:

We've seen something like this before, of course (see above - the name of the government body has changed), and this time it came with this "explanation":

Quote:

I ordered for the tax demand letter from they Royal Department of Finance and Revenues and i have attached it for your perusal.

About the code you are asking for am not the bank and the bank in japan will know the code because when transfer the fund all the receiving bank code will appear for the transfer to take place.

So in bank transfer the code does not matter ,what matter is if the account is valid and if your bank can transfer the fund out.Just give the bank account information and all your bank have to do is to transfer the fund .

You are holding this fund to reach your account and am trying my best for this transaction to make sure all thing works out .So do just that and let me see to your fund transfer immediately.

Well, something didn't seem quite right to my character, so I replied just now:

Quote:

Please can you recommend me a competent barrister to deal with this case? I ask because I do not believe that you have the faintest idea of what you are talking about here.

I have explained to you that it is the Royal Department of Finance and Revenues that is involved, and not the Department of Finance and Revenues. There in an enormous difference between these bodies.

Furthermore, VAT is not applicable in this case. Either Capital Appreciation Tax or the Monetary Overseas Unregistered Sales Excise *may be* applicable. In any case, if it were applicable to me, the amount would be expressed in Japanese yen.

Lastly, and most importantly, this so-called "document" is addressed to NatWest Bank, not me. This is a matter for NatWest Bank to settle with the UK Government, and then for the bank to settle with me. In the UK, a bank has no legal power to collect taxes on behalf of the government, as determined in R. v Goosecreature (Royal Supreme High Court, 1987).

I advise that you pass the case to someone in London who is better qualified to deal with these complex issues than you, and let me have the name and contact details of same. Naturally, when I receive the money, I will pay fees to you commensurate with the amount of work you have done so far, as well as a suitable referral fee for the new financial expert.

I do find it odd that UK VAT should be claimed in dollars and not in Thai baht, for example. Anyway, we will see if the Royal Supreme High Court passes into scammer folklore. Remember, folks, you heard it here first.

Posted: Sat May 10, 2008 10:45 pm

He's back.

Quote:

First of all you dont know any thing as you claimed ,the letter was given to natwest bank to issue to you who is the beneficiary to the fund and the order was given to the bank to stop the fund transfer to the listed persons in the letter which your name was involved.

So this tax is a valve added tax fee which you are to pay because of the fund which you are the beneficiary of it. So why are you making things diffcult for me and your self.They Royal Department of Finance and Revenues gave you that letter and you saying another thing.Just go through the letter very well and comply with the instructions therein.

No matter how you want to the money to be transfer is not the issue or how you want to pay it with any currence is not the issue ,just pay the fee and get the fund released to you account.You are making me to have sleepless night about this issue and you complication matter her.

I have make sure that i obtained all the documents in your name and i paid for all the documents which i didnt collect money from you and till now making sure all went well and now is your turn to pay for the fee to get this fund out and pay me ,rather you beaten around the bush.

Please just go and pay the fee you are required to pay and let the fund reach your account immediately.

N/B

Know that if you can not pay for the fee and i will wirte a letter of withdrawer to the bank on your behalf to disclaim you as the next of kin beneficiary of the fund.

My reply:

Quote:

How dare you insult me, you ignorant small boy lover of goats!

I make my living as an international tax consultant � maybe you didn�t realize that. I suggest you telephone my bank at the number I gave you to verify this. So all this bullshit about VAT being payable is a complete load of crap.

The issue is not what I want, but what the law demands, and the law does not demand VAT to be paid on such transactions. Furthermore, if you knew anything about these matters, you would know that the Royal Department of Finance and Revenues is a name I invented to test your knowledge of these matters. You failed the test.

I also telephoned NatWest Bank, and they know nothing about this fund. They tell me that the documents you sent to me are fake. I don't know who you got them from, but they took advantage of your ignorance and stupidity to make a fool of you.

So I would recommend that you look a little more closely at the documents passed to you before you try to lay down the law on matters you don't understand.

I am sorry if you are out of pocket regarding the expenses you have incurred, but I think you should learn a lot more about these matters before attempting to deal with them.

I have a feeling that we haven't heard the last of this. There are a couple of loopholes open still for him.

Posted: Sun May 11, 2008 11:18 am

Quote:

So this tax is a valve added tax fee

Is this tax payable if you use transistors instead of valves? Laughing

Posted: Sun May 11, 2008 10:47 pm

He's getting a little annoyed.

Quote:

You dont know any thing about the law (that makes two of us) and i guess you are big fool for dealing with you and your bank said that the dont know you.

What you claim is not who you are (yes, he's right there) just go and pay the fee you are asked to pay and i guess that your plan is take the fund and move a way (but I'm already in Japan - where will I move to?).

I have all you bank information (even though the bank doesn't know me) and i will forward it to the agency for more action to you.So for your own good go and pay the fee you are asked to pay.

My response:

Quote:

I am amazed at your message. For someone who doesn't even know what tax departments exist in the UK, you have a nerve to say I know nothing about the law.

If my bank said that they don't know me, how could NatWest make that original payment, eh? You said that you had talked to my bank earlier about me.

I am beginning to have second thoughts about you, barrister Mike. I used to think you were a fool. Maybe you're not a barrister at all, but a fraudster and a cheat.

Get this into your thick brain - I am not paying a non-existent tax to an imaginary department of the British government. You must come up with a better reason for me to pay money.

So the challenge is there - he has to persuade me to give him money. I've all but called him a scammer - will he drop me completely or does he think there's still a chance. Stay tuned...

Posted: Mon May 12, 2008 6:20 am

He's a persistent one is our Barrister I'll give him that. If you want to meddle with his head I've got his real identity out of him.

Quote:

Thanks for your mail and i will give all the informations needed.

NAME :
LOCATION : NIGERIAN.

I wait for your reply.

Mike Peters

Trying to get a Benin safari out of him Smile

Posted: Mon May 12, 2008 6:54 am

^^^^

Thanks - B@l@ M@rt1ns (my favorite dollachoppa) is just centering the fray to chop his dolla, sending a message to with his real name as part of the message:

Quote:

who ur maga now small boi

ooooooo

lost in translation Joined: 08 Aug 2007 Posts: 531

~ sunshine,

He said to send the moneys to OGOOCHI GOO IMNOGOOD, right? Laughing

Posted: Thu May 15, 2008 2:47 am

thomas-the-tank and sunshine, this is wonderful baiting, and funny as hell. Bravo!