George Bush & the Village People

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Posted: Tue Apr 21, 2009 7:55 pm

SP! I nearly pissed myself with laughter reading that! I cannot believe this guy is still on the hook! Where do you find them? Can you send me one?

Posted: Tue Apr 21, 2009 7:58 pm

Oh my word!

How could you (419eater) forget him? Can't you give him your ear???

I'll really dress up this time for the front row. Laughing

Posted: Tue Apr 21, 2009 8:27 pm

Wow, this lad really is the gift that keeps on giving!

Posted: Tue Apr 21, 2009 10:25 pm

Go on SP give him your ear, give him another task and give us all a laugh. Laughing

Trophy Videos · Posted: Tue Apr 21, 2009 10:34 pm

Please, SP. Just a few words. Do it for the love of Eater. Very Happy

419Eater is my life Joined: 20 Jan 2009 Posts: 445

Truly amazing clapping

Baiting Guru Joined: 08 Jul 2004 Posts: 11857 Location: UK

I sent laddy a reply, I think I'll try to get him to be an agent first, then work on some other stuff:

Quote:

Dear xxxxx xxxxxu,

Thank you for your email, to quote this part of your email:

"Sir, I do know that you have not forgotten me."

Actually, I had forgotten all about you, it was not until I had read through your email that I had a slight recollection of who you were, I remember the Volkswagen photos you did, and the fantastic music videos you made, those were happy days.

What exactly was the point of your email to me? I read it twice but could not put my finger on exactly what point you are trying to convey to me, please clarify in your next reply.

What are you doing with yourself at present? Have you been in touch with Brandie lately, I know she was in a psychiatric hospital for some time due to mental health problems that you caused her to have, she was then released and the last I heard was that she had to be re-admitted to the psychiatric ward after having a relapse.

I'm happy to be able to tell you that she is due to be released again on April 29th, and if you have not already done so, I suggest that you email her straight away, so that your mail is waiting in her inbox when she is released. I know she would love to hear from you, because one of my secretaries spoke to her recently when she visited her in hospital, she speaks about you all the time, even though you are the cause of all of her health problems, and trsut me when I say this, that gal loves you more than anything on earth, do not break her heart again, if you do, mark my words, xxxxx, I can still make you vanish for good!

I am still not thoroughly convinced that you have given up your 419 fraud career, what assurances can you give me that you have put all of that behind you? At the end of the day, all you can do is tell me in words written in an email, and as you can imagine, anyone can say anything in the written word, but that does not mean they are being truthful in what they say, for all I know, you could have sent this email to me in between sending out scam emails from the same internet cafe, what exactly can you do to convince me of your sincerity in what you have told me?

One thing I do remember from our previous email conversations, I mentioned to you about you being enlisted as a special agent to do undercover work in Nigeria, that is still an option for you, even though I have now left the Presidency, I still hold high positions in Government and can get things done due to who I am, just say the word and I will instigate making you an undercover special agent, this is a way for me to know you are completely genuine.

I will also have other assignments for you to do, again, all in the name of proving yourself to me, once I am sattisfied that you are completely rehabilitated and free from a life of 419. I can then make your dreams come true, you still want to come and live in the US don't you? You want to marry Brandie don't you? You want to be a success in the music industry don't you?

xxxxx, I can make anything happen for you, I can also make anything happen to you, so work with me, not against me, if you do, you will find your life taking a turn for the better, I know you have had some bad times during the last couple of years, now is the time for you to turn your life around, but never cross me, because even though you have learned some skills when making the songs and videos, those skills will be of no use to you if I make you vanish for good, I can be your best friend, or I can be your worst enemy, so think on, son.

Sincerely,

GWB.

[edit]

Just to add, for any latecomers, the full bait is here:

www.the-numpties.info/the_village_people_numpty.html

Posted: Thu Apr 23, 2009 7:44 pm

Quote:

I can make anything happen for you, I can also make anything happen to you,

I just love that line. clapping

419Eater is my life Joined: 07 Apr 2006 Posts: 441

Whow... he's still there, isn't he?

Has anyone baited or ASEMed him from a different account recently, to find out if he is still scamming?

Trophy Videos · Posted: Fri Apr 24, 2009 12:23 am

He's gonna be a great special agent. Very Happy

Baiting Guru Joined: 08 Jul 2004 Posts: 11857 Location: UK

Forgot to check my email from this lad and he sent this to Brandie 2 days ago, sounds like he's having a bad time of it Laughing

Quote:

Subject: THANKS BE TO GOD!!!

My Love,

No wonder! I have been writing to sometime ago and didn’t get any reply. I have been going through a real tough time all these while. I just got a mail from Mr. Ex-President. In the mail, he made me to understand that you had to go back to the hospital after the mail you sent last year. It was my entire fault! If I had lived a better life, I would have been with you by now. However that may be, I am very sorry for all these pain I caused you. I just pray that things will surely work well so that I will replenish and wash away all the pain I made you go through. I am very sorry.

As it is, I have not gone to the café for some months now. I sent you a couple of mails and didn’t get any reply. I don’t have anybody to correspond with in the net. So, since all have forgotten me, coupled with the fact that I cannot afford the money to go the café, I left the café and the net alone until my Choirmaster told me to go check my mail after he had a dream seeing me with a letter. It was then that I saw the mail from Mr. Bush. He told me that you would come out of the hospital by the 29th of April. I hope you are out and sound now. I hope you are really doing great. I hope you will find a space in your heart to forgive me all the pain I caused you.

To be frank with you, it has not been easy with me. When I wrote the mails and didn’t get a reply, I saw myself very much alone in this world. I was very much dejected, demoralized and sad. Even now, I sleep in a friend’s barbing saloon. I bed on the floor. I have become so emaciated … my neck looks more like a rope with my head dangling on top like a hard coconut. I know all these were things I caused myself. However, with Mr. Bush’s mail, I have really regained a lot of strength; gotten a new zeal to live and ready to pay back all the love I made you loose all these while. Do not worry. I am very optimistic that I will still have you in my arms one day… very very soon. I am becoming very impatient. I will have to have patience and allow things to work out by themselves.

The only thing I beg you now is to reply this mail as soon as you get it. It will make me more revitalized. The wording of the mail of Mr. Bush was quite encouraging, envigourating, full of best things to come for us. So, put yourself together and know that I really love and miss you. I thought I have lost you not knowing that I was the cause of your silence, your pain, and your hospitalization! I thought I would never forgive myself for making these things happen to you but the wording of the mail of Mr. Bush made a lot of things smooth. At least, Mr. Bush is greatly by your side. He still wants me to take good care of you by the time he has assisted us to achieve what we are working on. So, baby, get up and rejoice. I will make up for all I made you go through. It is now just a matter of time.

How is Luther? I hope he has not forgotten me. Send my regards to him. I still love and cherish you. It pains most when I pick your picture and look at your image and not having the opportunity to touch you life. I know that some day, very soon we shall have tales to tell our children. Get up! Be strong! Forget all those sad moments in the past! The future is really very bright. Just make sure you get in touch with Mr. Bush and tell him that you are ok. When you do that, he will do something that will make us to unite again to part no more.

I just wish you write me as soon as possible so that I will finally have a COMPLETE JOY knowing that my rib have really come to live, healthy, sound and full of life! I love you. A word from you will do wonders to my being. Remain healthy. Till I hear from you.

I still remain your love,

xxxxx.

He sent this to president Bush the same day Laughing

:

Quote:

Your Excellency,

I still cannot believe it! His Excellency, Mr. Ex-President, George Walker Bush, the 43rd President of the United States Of America, God's own country, most powerful country in the world is calling me ‘SON’... pinch.... Iyke, is it really you? My God! Sir, you may not believe it but, you have recreated me anew; your email has put a great source of life into me. I was at the gates of death, beckoning on death to come up and do his/her/it's worse when your mail came in... Now, though, no matter how depreciated, emaciated and laughed at by people, I can manage to smile again, sing and dance since yesterday I visited the cafe after about a month and some weeks I last visited the cafe to see if you have replied my mail.

Truly, I have really lost hope in hearing from you again. If not my choirmaster, I wouldn't have bordered going to the cafe to check my mail in the first place. Who do I correspond with again? I left fraud for good and vowed never to go back to it again in my life. It was my choirmaster that encouraged me to go and check my email. He saw me in the church yesterday (I stopped going to church for some time) and told me to wait behind after service. I waited. After asking about my whereabouts all these while, he asked me if I had been checking my email. I answered in the negetive. He told me that he had a dream where I ran to him with a letter; that I should go and check my email. I reluctantly went later in the day to the cafe, bought some time, and signed in. On opening my mailbox, it was filled with junk mails. I nearly high lightened the whole page to delete but on a second thought, I decided to look closely at the mails to check them out.... THEN I SAW IT!!! I looked at it again, again and again to make sure of what I am seeing! I minimized the page and never knew when I started shouting, singing and dancing in the cafe making the whole place a disco hall. People were shouting at me to keep quiet that the cafe is a public place... for me they were talking to themselves. Then the manager of the cafe came into the matter and threatened calling the police, it was then I had to calm down. I immediately signed out and left the cafe to come back today to send this reply!

Sir, I am very grateful for your mail. I have really waited for this mail all these years. I thank God so much for this mercy I am receiving ... thanks and glory be to God.

Sir, just to remind you about what we were talking about since 2007. You wanted to assist me through Mr. Luther to produce the music of the Village People, the YMCA track. We have gone a long way until my past caught up with me. I am still very sorry for the type of life I lived in the past. Sir, to be very honest with you, I have left fraud alone. My leaving fraud and with the way things are in my country now, I am going through hell. I lost my rented apartment since I cannot pay the bills. I now sleep in a friend’s barbing saloon. I will have to wait for all the customers who came to have a haircut to go before I will sweep the place and bed on the floor, most times never before 11pm. In the morning I will go to the wharf to have an attachment with a clearing and forwarding firm where I escort cleared containers to their destinations within Lagos. (Just to make sure that the container was safely delivered. For each container I escort, I will be paid #1, 000 Naira (equivalent to $5 Dollars, 6pence). Unfortunately. This doesn't come by often. If you should see me now, my neck can be used as a rope with my head suspending like a coconut on top. Sir, with my life and with the air that I breath this very hour, I swear it, I have left fraud alone for good. Nothing will make me go back to that type of life again. Because of fraud, I would have being in the USA by now; I would have being able to fend for myself and for my stroke-stricken father lying paralyzed in the village. Worst still, Brandie would have not gone to the psychiatric home. All these are my entire fault. No Sir! Never again Sir! I have had enough. I will happily die now as I am than to go back to fraud and become a rich thief. But, with you Sir assisting me, I will surely be able to live a live that is worthy of being lived. Take my word Sir, my past (though may be hunting me) is in the past tense.

Sir, I have been writing to Brandie as well but I wasn’t getting any reply. I never knew that she went back to the hospital. We did send each other mails sometime last year in September precisely. After that, I sent a couple of mails but got no reply. I never knew that she was going through pain that I was responsible of. I am so so sorry about all these happenings. I hope you will assist me to make her happy, provide for her, make her forget all the pains I caused her, and make her feel like a real woman. I will send her a mail after this.

Sir, I will never cross you neither would I refuse to work with you. I have taken a few risks in the past. I do not know how I will tell you this or the exert words to use... But to put it frankly... I AM NO MORE A FRAUDSTAR. I am ready and willing to work with you knowing fully well that you can make things happen for me. I have said it severally that you loose nothing in helping me or throwing me to the dogs. I will always want to be the best friend of the 43rd President of the most powerful country in the world. To be your enemy... not to mention 'worst enemy', is my funeral! For me to die now will be a complete waste. I have not achieved anything yet in this life. I am surely safe with you and with the Almighty God.

Sir, truly, I am now a happy man. I know we have not arrived to the final destination but hearing from you alone has made me to revive. Thank you so much. You will always remain blessed both now and forever. I told my Choirmaster about the mail, he was happy as well. He said that at least all the hard work we had in preparing the music and the videos will not go in vain. And that was why God showed him the mail in my mailbox.

I will have to stop here and wait to hear from you again. Enjoy your status as the immediate Ex-president of the USA. May the Lord God keep you healthy and happy.

Yours Sincerely,

xxxxx.

Posted: Thu May 21, 2009 4:18 am

YMCA... I have that song in my head and on my iPod, the African version. Nice work. I love that this guy is still emotionally invested in this.

Posted: Thu May 21, 2009 5:29 am

It's amazing that he's still on the hook after all this time. Wow!

Maybe you should ASEM him to see how serious he is about putting "fraud" behind him....

Posted: Thu May 21, 2009 10:49 am

Quote:

my neck can be used as a rope with my head suspending like a coconut on top.

Posted: Thu May 21, 2009 9:38 pm

Quote:

I am going through hell. I lost my rented apartment since I cannot pay the bills. I now sleep in a friend’s barbing saloon. I will have to wait for all the customers who came to have a haircut to go before I will sweep the place and bed on the floor

Aw, I'm getting ll warm and fuzzy. Nice to see a lad taking full advantage of being given a hand, er, 'up' in the world.

Very Happy

Trophy Videos · Posted: Fri May 22, 2009 2:39 pm

This guy is hilarious! LMAO at the same line, Corona! Laughing

Posted: Fri May 22, 2009 10:12 pm

SP, when is Your Excellency going to reply? You cant leave us in suspense.
Twisted Evil

Posted: Sat May 23, 2009 6:51 pm

If this lad is still looking for show business work, there's always a part available in the blockbuster lad production of Rankl3 Jon3s! Laughing

Baiting Guru Joined: 08 Jul 2004 Posts: 11857 Location: UK

Brandie sent laddy a reply, build him up, knock him down, build him up again, and hopefully make him a bit paranoid as well. Even after all this time, he probably still has no idea how to take me, I can be sweet and a bitch at the same time Smile

:

Quote:

Hi xxxxx,

At last, I am back from the great abyss that is the mental hospital, you have no idea what I have been through over the last months, you think you have it hard sleeping on the barber shop floor, belive me, many a time I would have gladly swapped the hospital for you barber shop floor bed, think yourself lucky and stop whining about how bad things are for you, there is always someone worse off than you, and I can't stand whiners.

My time in hospital gave me a lot of time to think about you and I, so many times I wished you were dead for putting me in this position, at times I was so insane that I even asked Mr Bush if he could have you killed for me, of course, he said that was not possible, he said he would only have you killed if you didn't do anything that he asks you to do.

So here we are again, I am back to full health, I'm happy to hear that you accept full responsibility for all that has happened to me and my health, all because you used to be a scum sucking 419er, just think, if you had not scammed anyone and not been found out, we would have been living happily together here in the US by now, who knows, maybe we would have already started a family, but you ruined all of that by being found out to be a scammer.

I want you to know that if you ever upset or hurt me again in any way, I will employ the services of a hitman to have you killed, and I will ask them to cut your balls off with an axe whilst you are still alive and make you eat them, just so you can feel my real anger, please don't make me do that to you baby, because deep inside I still love you more than anything, even though you are a vile scamming worm!!!

Mr Bush told me you were going to be some sort of Nigerian special agent for him, what has he asked you to do? Is it some sort of covert undercover work? Maybe it's fighting 419 fraud in some way so that you can atone for your fraud sins? I didn't want to ask him what you were doing in case it's top secret, but you can tell me if you want, I wont tell him that you told me about it. Please make sure you do whatever it he asks you to do, because I know he'll be very angry if you don't comply, and I would rather you live than die, even though he is no longer the president, he is still very influential and could get you taken down very easily, so try your best to do whatever needs doing.

Luther sends his regards to you, he hasn't forgotten you, wel,l he didn't want anything more to do with you, but you know how it is, I'm such a cutie and a sweet talker that I talked him round Smile

So as long as you do everything that everyone asks of you, it wont be long before you are living here with me as man and wife, making music and films, living the good life again and living happily ever after, those are my dreams. It's all down to you now baby, just you make sure you don't shatter my dreams again, because you will be the sorryest son of a bitch ever if you do.

Baby, guess what, since I got out of hospital I have had this rich guy hassling me for a date, ok, yes, he's really gorgeous, but I keep telling him that I'm taken by someone else, namely you, but he still keeps pestering me, sending me flowers and chocolates, and he even sent me a $10,000 diamond necklace the other day, that's not much money to him because he's a multi millionaire, but I'm going to keep myself just for you, you're the one that I want, you're all that I've ever wanted, you are very cute and you have the voice of an angel, I don't care if your head feels like a hard coconut on a skinny neck, you're still the man of my dreams, and anyway, I love coconut.

I have got sooooo much to do at the moment after being away from home for so long, so I'm going to keep this email short for now, make sure you check your emails regularly to keep in touch with me, and also because Mr Bush said he's sending you an email tomorrow or the next day.

Oh, before I forget, I'm not trying to make you feel paranoid, but watch your back, I think someone is following you all the time, day and night, watching to see what you are doing and who you are talking to, so keep away from any scammers or other undesirables at all times, I heard that from one of Mr Bush's secretaries who is a friend of mine, it's probably undercover operatives from the CIA watching you, no doubt on Mr Bush's orders before he makes you one of those special agent thingys, love you babes take care!!!

Hope to hear from you again soon babe.

LOVE YOU ALWAYS

All My Love,

Brandie.

XxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxX

Posted: Tue May 26, 2009 11:27 pm

SP, you must have so much fun writing those emails! Brilliant stuff.

Posted: Tue May 26, 2009 11:35 pm

You are going to have him forever and ever. clapping

We might learn to love him. Laughing

Posted: Thu May 28, 2009 1:30 am

^^^I love your lad, already, SP!

Elite Baiter Joined: 28 Feb 2007 Posts: 1731

SP, your lad has always been such an inspiration to me in my own baits. I just wrote a lad and told him it came to me in a dream that George Bush told me to make up with him. Thanks again for posting!

Posted: Thu May 28, 2009 9:13 am

You craft a great letter, SP. clapping

Posted: Fri May 29, 2009 8:17 pm

Seems this bait is gaining interest in the Nigerian community

http://www.nairaland.com/nigeria/topic-58895.0.html Shocked

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