yahoo dating site wink turns into scam

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Posted: Mon Oct 02, 2006 9:07 pm

unfortunately this was pretty short lived, and admittedly the fun was more on my end of making up such ludicrous emails...
basically I got a "wink" on my yahoo dating account from, by the picture, an attractive caucasian girl who lives in my same state. she hinted at a yahoo email address... I was pretty suspicious but figured what the hey, so I just wrote a supershort email to that address and just said hi, got your flirt, how are you.
and so it began:
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Good to hear from you,how are you doing today?hope you had a peaceful night?My name is Melanie,29 F CO,i am 5.7tall,173lbs,i am a model,single and no kids.i travel much due to my job,i am presently in Nigeria to model for a new established hotel.I love clubbing,dancing,swiming,shopping,sightseeing and traveling.I am an only child,my parent are divorce and it's really hard on me been an only child.I am seeking for an honest and caring man,someone that would appreciate my been there for him,someone that would cherish my beauty,someone that will never raise his hands on me.hope this explain little about me.How old are you and what do you do for a living?hope to hear from you soon.have a peaceful day.
Mel
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I figured if "she'll" sell me a pack of lies, why not return the favor. needless to say, a girl 5'7 (which is MY height) who weighs 173 lbs (20 lbs heavier than me) is NOT gonna be a model, much less would a nigerian hotel send for such a 'model' to celebrate their opening Razz

.
you'll also recognize Mike Myers' bit from Austin powers when I tell her a little about me, but then I added more randomness of my own..

Hi Mel,

I hope you're having a fun time in nigeria. be sure to eat at a restaurant called McDonalds, I hear they have the finest food in all nigeria.
A little more about me. I'm 1.5 m tall and ~91 kg. The details of my life are quite inconsequential... very well, where do I begin? My father was a relentlessly self-improving boulangerie owner from Belgium with low grade narcolepsy and a penchant for buggery. My mother was a fifteen year old French prostitute named Chloe with webbed feet. My father would womanize, he would drink. He would make outrageous claims like he invented the question mark. Sometimes he would accuse chestnuts of being lazy. The sort of general malaise that only the genius possess and the insane lament. My childhood was typical. Summers in Rangoon, luge lessons. In the spring we'd make meat helmets. When I was insolent I was placed in a burlap bag and beaten with reeds- pretty standard really. At the age of twelve I received my first scribe... Ever since then I've enjoyed writing... which is why I currently deliver pizzas for a well established restaurant. I write poems that incorporate the buyer's name and address and how much they owe. They really seem to like it.
what do you do for fun when you'renot modeling? I like to chase dogs with shopping carts... its good exercise. I also enjoy playing tennis but I like to use golf balls instead of a tennis ball, it makes it more challenging. Besides writing, I love to read. Dr. Suess is my favorite.. his self help books have really turned me around. I also like to cook. The recipe that everyone says I make very well is what I call "Le PB&J".. its a surprise.. maybe I can make it for you some time..
well, enough about me, I hope you'll write back soon!
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Good to hear from you,how are you doing today?hope you had a peaceful night?I am really worried today,i was in a meeting with my manager and client,i think i will be delayed,my payment was made in United States Postal Money Order for safety purpose and it can only be cash in the states.Although i never wanted to bother you but i will really appreciate if you can help me in cashing the money orders,All i needed is your full name and either your home or work address since you are always at work during the day time and I will mail it to you and you will take it to your bank and get it cashed,then wire the cash back to me via Western Union so that i can settle my hotel bills and get my ticket back to the states.Hope to hear from you soon,have a peaceful day.
Mel
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Hi Mel;
I'm sorry to hear you're having money problems. I used to have money problems too, but not anymore!! See, I got in trouble with the IRS because I wouldn't pay taxes for 10 years now. its my money, why do they need it, right?!?!? So, after I got out of prison I just decided I wasn't going to take part in their system... So I don't have a bank account or even use cash or credit cards anymore....Remember how I told you I work at a pizza place?? Well, as you must know since you live here too, in colorado pizza is pretty scarce, and people will pay a lot of money for a pizza. So.. thats what I do-- I pay for things in PIZZA!!! its great. I rent my apartment and the person I rent it from lets me pay them with 10 pizzas a month.. so about every three days I give them a pizza. I have friends who still stupidly trust the government and they use cash, so I tell them what groceries I need and they buy them and I pay them with pizza. The same for gas in my car-- I know a friend who works in a gas station and whenver I want to fill up, he lets me fill up a full tank for 3 pizzas.
So, anyway, I'm sorry that I can't help cash your check, but maybe if you will pay for the delivery costs, I can mail you many pizzas and you can see if people over there will trade for it so you can get a ticket to come back here.
Let me know,
bdb
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Hi Mel,
Now I'm worried! I haven't heard from you in a few days.. I hope things are going ok. Like I said, let me know if you'd like me to send you some pizzas over there, maybe it can help pay for things in Nigeria. Of course I'll need help covering the shipping costs, but I'd be glad to send the pizzas to you.
Take care,

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and sadly, surprisingly.. no reply back (I waited a week between these last two emails, and sent the last one today. somehow I doubt Ill get a reply ,but I think I"ll send a few more to the email just for kicks.

Posted: Mon Oct 02, 2006 10:18 pm

PizzaGram !!! I love that one

Evil Evil You !!!

Posted: Mon Oct 02, 2006 11:21 pm

That was excellent. I'd give you a A for creativity. So funny!

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