my first bait, so far...

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Posted: Tue May 30, 2006 2:37 pm

ok ive just started baiting about a week ago and ive got a few lads on the go, most of 'em are straight baits wasting time but this was the first one i replied to and after a slow start its getting a little interesting so i thoought i'd share it. i'll add to it as i get reply's. i seem to have deleted his original email but it basically went along the lines of: My name is Laxxrry Mooxrxe and i am dying of cancer. i am very rich and want you to send your bank account details so i can transfer the money and you can keep some and donate the rest to charity blah blah. you'll pick up the story quick enough, heres my first reply:

Dear Laxrxry Moxoxre

Your story made me very upset but very happy at the same time. Here you are dying which makes me sad, but you are also offering me lots of money which makes me very happy. Its a win-win situation i guess.Please, i want to help you as i am very involved with charity myself and i would use the money wisely to make myself and other people very happy and give the poor hope again.
Please reply as soon as possible and tell me what i have to do.

Yours truly,

Joxel Dxavixdxson

Quote:

My Dear Friend ,
I have received your mail and i must first of
all show my appreciation ,over the fact that
you have given heed to the entreaty of a
dying man.
Like i had told you in my previous mail, i
lived a very reckless life when it mattered
most.
All i thought about was my various
investments, it is that same care free
attitude that is going to cost me a lot now.
When i discovered this ailment, it dawned on
me that i had been living a very vain
life.Then the need to affect the lives of
those in need became very paramount in my
thoughts. This appears to be a case of
medicine after death as i no longer have the
strength to do those things i used to do when
i was still very full of life.
Friend,in my resolve to actualize my dying
wish, i have been able to support charity to
a very large extent around the middle east
and europe. Then my health became a sorry
tale, that at this particular point in time,
i live at the mercy of various drugs and
operations which certainly can not remedy
anything. My close family members are however
not happy with the way i have disbursed
everything of mine to the motherless babies
and the less privileged. That was why they
failed to help me actualise my dream of
supporting charity.
They held for themselves the funds i made
available and went as far as even trying to
terminate my life when the hour(though very
short )has not come. All relationship with me
has been severed ,and they are of the opinion
that the last of my fortune has been spent.
Incidentally, the sum of four million dollars
(united states) lies in a security company in
Europe , and well packaged in a consignment.
That is the last i have here on earth after
my medical bills have been estimated and all
expenses paid pending when i shall be no
more. These funds i wish to entrust to you ,
to help propagate the works of charity where
ever your location is. By so doing, i would
need your utmost sincerity and honesty to
carry the venture along successfully.
It would be required of you to furnish me
with your full names and address, telephone
and fax numbers , to enable me put a letter
to the security company, making you the
eligible beneficiary to the funds with them.
Once this is done, you shall make
arrangements with them on how the funds would
be transferred to your location. I beg of you
to deal with me honestly and render me your
assistance to the fullest of your capacity.
you would be helping a dying man. Most
importantly you would be touching the lives
of a huge number of people. I hope i would be
able to count on you while i wait impatiently
for the time to come. My bones are slowly
cleaving to my skin. I hope to hear from you
as soon as possible.
Regards
Laxrxry Moxoxre.
Note:This is my very confidential email
address,and I expect all futher
correspondence
via this email address.

Dear Laxrxry

It was great to hear from you again but your story is very sad for me to read, it really brought a tear to my eye. I would dearly love to help you however my ministry forbids me from entering any business deal with partners who are not part of our faith. I am sorry but I dont think there is anything more I can do to help you.
If you ever decide to join our faith then of course I could help you both with my experience and financial support. Our church is very involved in charity work and it would be such a shame if we were unable to continue working with you.

I wish you well in your endeavour my brother.

Blessings,

Joxexl Daxvidsxon

Quote:

My Dear Joxel,
Thanks for responding to my message.
Like I told you, i have realised my faults
thus my trying to distribute my money to
charity.
If you accept me as a member of you organisation,
I agree.
But the only impendiment is that I am too weak
to participate in any activity,but I can support
your organisation with what ever I have.
The reason is because I want to see
the kingdom of heaven , by my charitable
acts.
Please I would plead with you to accept me,
and help me obtain my funds for the security company.
As you know cancer is a terminal disease and I could
die at any time.
Please see to my plight and put yourself in thesame
condition ,which I pray you would never enter.
I need you help,to distribute my money to charity.
If you require anything from me I SHALL DO.
I Remain
Dying Laxrrxy Moxoxre

Dear Laxrxry,

Sorry for my late reply as i know that your condition is severe and you may die at any time and that would be a great shame.
Anyway I understand that in your condition you may not be able to complete all the phases of our membership process as some of these processes could be deemed "physical", this may pose a problem however as all members of the Order of The White Kangaroo have followed the rules of membership and these rules have never been broken in the entire history of the our faith. I have told our Arch Bishop Peter Griffen of the situation and he is now considering what to do, afterall the wish of a dying man is a very powerful wish indeed. Don't worry though I haven't told him about your proposal and i do not intend to as i do not want to complicate your membership application with matters of money. Arch Bishop Peter Griffen has told me that a decision will be made in as soon as possible.
As I said, I understand that time is not on your side and I have stressed this to Arch Bishop Peter Griffen that a decision must be made promptly, to help the process along as quick as possible though it would be great if you could begin the first phase of membership. The more evidence we can provide of your willingness to join the more chance you will have of being successful and we can then do business together.
The first phase of membership is a simple one, you must provide some identification and write a letter telling us why you wish to join our faith, Order of The White Kangaroo. The longer your letter the more impressive it will be for Arch Bishop Peter Griffen to read and im positive he will let you join after reading it. Please send your details and the letter to me as soon as possible as I know that time is of the essence.

Get well soon,

Joxel Dxavixdxson

Order of The White Kangaroo
" In The White Kangaroo we trust"

Quote:

My Brother,
All I wanted was someone who would help me distribute
my money to charity as a fulfilment of my last wishes.
I guess your requirements have become so though for
me as a person.
I would once more plead with you to give me your own personal
assistance or I guess you have to cut short my proposal so
that I could look for someone else.
Regards
Dying Laxrxry Mxoxore

Dear Laxrxry,

Im sorry that it has to be this way, it is beyond my control as to break the rules of my church and enter into partnership with a non-member I would surely be punished. As the treasurer of the Order of The White Kangaroo I have a great responsibilty handling the great amount of money in our church accounts and I cannot break the rules for anyone especially not handing out bank account details to non-members even if the money is intended for charity. On the other hand if you were a member im positive the Arch Bishop Peter Griffen would be more than happy to authorise the transfer of your funds into our account. I pray for you Larry Moore and I hope very much that you will reconsider becoming a member of the Order of The White Kangaroo, alas though if you cannot I believe our communications will have to come to an end. I have attached some photos of myself and the church for you to put by your bedside so that if we cannot continue our partnership at least I can watch you die. (ive attached two very large corrupted jpeg files for him to play with)

Get well soon,

Joexl Davixxdson

Order of The White Kangaroo
" In The White Kangaroo we trust"

lets hope he decides to become a member....

Posted: Fri Jun 16, 2006 6:27 pm

you can add some twists and make your lad look plain dumb to make this a wonderful bait. feel free to ask your lad very weird questions Very Happy

Posted: Sun Jun 18, 2006 12:08 am

Amazing how that "my religion doesn't allow me to do business with anyone who is not of our faith" line works every time.

He wouldn't be the first person to be baptised on his deathbed. Of course he can go through with it (whatever you decide "it" is). And now the idiot has to find something that looks like a hospital bed, as well as all the other props. Smile

Posted: Sun Jun 18, 2006 1:49 am

Quote:

agree.
But the only impendiment is that I am too weak
to participate in any activity,but I can support
your organisation with what ever I have.

I'd tell him that he may solicit the help of a friend or close associate to complete the membership requirements on his behalf.

No problem then!

Give him every oppurtunity to join and then if he still doesn't want to join, slap him for being so difficult.

Posted: Wed Jun 21, 2006 5:09 pm

I wonder if the "too weak to get out of bed" thing is partially an attempt to forestall safari/picture requests. I got a "dying need to distribute funds to charity" letter that seemed to take a few such precautions - too weak to get out of bed, and can't call me (though I can apparently speak to her nurse if I need to).

I'm sure your order has a wonderful, invalid-friendly induction ceremony somewhere in their tomes of ritual. And forms. Lots of forms. I mean, how hard is it to dictate answers to your nurse?