Poor Mrs Brown

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Hello I'm New here! Joined: 07 Aug 2007 Posts: 9

Hi

Here are the highlights from my first attempt - I think I have scared them off by being too silly and probably the mention of an attorney. I have of course learnt from this error, but I was having way too much of a good time to wind it in! Scammer in blue - me in green.

Greetings beloved in christ,
I must express my profound gratitude in your willingness to assist me in realising my dreams of helping the less priviledge and the needy.
Beloved,due to my present state of health,i have handed everything to my lawyer but i would want you to get back to me with the information below so that i can tell my lawyer about you as the one the Lord directed to me in utilising the funds for this purpose and he shall give you guidelines on receiving the funds on my behalf.
The details i need to send to him for introduction are:
Blah Blah
Once i receive this details from you,i shall contact my lawyer immediately to act on your behalf.

Please endeavour to pray for me always and may the peace of God reign in your life and your family.
Attached is my picture at the hospital where i am presently receiving treatment with my doctor.

Yours in Christ,
Mrs.Brown.

Oh poor you - you don't look very well at all - I truly hope that this mail does not find you already dead my dearest friend.
As you have requested so beautifully here are my detailings:

My name is XXXX and I am living at The Warren, 34 Dingly Dell, Chorlton-Upon-Wheelie, W. Mids. UK. I have no telephone due to the recent flooding in my area and my telegraph pole has floated away. This should be resolved soon.
I was baptised into the church of the fallen madonna with the big boobies but have been thinking about becoming a catholic or maybe a Mormon (I am currently looking around to see who is doing the best introductory offer). I was born on 6 June 1966 in a small scottish hamlet but am now settled in Chorlton-Upon-Wheelie in the Midlands of England.
I hope your pain is not too bad but if I can help you with pills or bandages please forward me the details of your hospital/ward number and I will arrange for a courier to deliver these vitals to you. I,m really so glad it is you that is dying and not me!

May God almighty bless and guild you in jesus name.................Amen. I have already forwarded the information to my attorney so that he can handle this transaction on my behalf because i am not feeling too strong to handle the whole thing.
Keep me posted immediately you hear from him or you can also reach him on: Blah Blah

Dear Anita
I will contact him immediately in the hope that I can help you before you are dead

Hello most esteemed barrister of law

I am contacting you today with urgent business regarding Mrs Anita Brown who I understand is known to you by virtue of the fact that she is in dire health and indeed nearly dead. I have seen a picture of her looking pretty bloody awful so I know that this is to be true - I have psychic gifts and I can see the black and yellow aura of death surrounding her - it is a shame that my gifts do not extend to the power of healing for then I could heal her and would truly be blessed!

I introduce myself as Miss XXXX, and I am a citizen of the UK, although I am descended from the Scottish Isle of Darkly-In-the-sea. I am to be helping Anita with her donation in the hope that some of the money will go towards some of the orphans in Darkly-in-the-sea who were left without parents during the great tidal event of September 2005 when many of my clan were swept away like small crabs. I can still imagine them clinging to the rocks with fear in their faces just before the great god of neptune snatched them away forever - smashed into crabmeat. Again, my limited gifts could not help them and for that I will grieve for the longest time.

Please instruct me on what I should do next

God be with you

I was contacted by Mrs.Anita Brown(my client) before you with your information been forwarded to me that you are now her new beneficiary to her funds lying in the bank.

I would like you to contact the bank, tell them that you are the new beneficiary to Mrs.Anita Brown and also ask them what you have to do so that you can receive the funds.
call me as soon as you receive this email.

Good luck,

Yours in service,
Barrister

Have you hear from my bank? what information did you hear from them? and how about my attorney..........I hope he is taking good care of the whole thing, please beloved sister i beg you in the name of God to try all your best to make sure this funds gets to you before i pass away because as you can see i am not getting better any more, my days are numbered and i don't think i will live more than a week because my situation right now is critical, i can not even make movements and my doctor here do not allow me to check or read my emails not even on phone due to my condition at the moment.

I dictate for one of the nurses here in the hospital, while she type the mails for me, I wish i will still be alive till i see you in person because you are such a wounderful woman, carring and so kind to me and i so much have the trust in you that you will use the funds as i wish and also as an agreement i made with God in life.

I have recently been in communications with a lady who is almost dead - in fact she sent me a picture in which she looked so dreadful that I fear she may already be dead or at the very least, in a coma or something. (I think she had been bleeding from a lot of her orifices whcih is unpleasant but fortunately not apparent in the phot she sent or I might have been sick)

I have also been in contact with her solicitor, a most honourable and upstanding man (not like one of those bastard solicitors who just wants to steal from you and rape your grandparents for fun) and he has instructed me to contact you and ask what I should do now as the new beneficiary of Mrs Brown's money.

Many thanks (mostly for not wanting to defile my grandparents)

Dearest Mr Barrister

In The matter of Mrs Anita Brown

I have been in contact with Zenith Bank and they are asking for several documents, all of which I will be requiring your help with. They are requesting the following:

Approval Document

Affidavit of claim

Certificate of change of ownership

They are suggesting that I need to get these documents from the office of the president! I don't know if I will be able to do this as I only get an hour for lunch. I am very worried that Mrs Anita Brown is going to die soon as she has now lost all movement in her arms and cannot even go to the toilet on her own or even manage to eat red jelly. It sounds very bad and if she starts to go yellow I am afraid that there will be only a matter of hours left. I have been in touch with my solicitor (Mr Ang I. O. Gram from Cardiac, Valve and Sons who are based in Western Utah) and I am waiting their assistance.

Dear Mrs Anita

I am very worried - I have heard nothing from your attorney or the bank for the last 2 days and If your doctor is correct, you will die on Wednesday. I do not know if this will now be enough time to sort out your financial affairs and I am concerned that unscrupulous witch doctors will get your money and spend it on poisons to poison the very children that you are trying to save. I know that you cannot now move your arms (and maybe this condition has spread to your eyes or maybe even your eyes have fallen out by now) but I beg you to ask your nurse to help so that I can havce all of your lovely money before Wenesday.

Not quite a Newb Joined: 09 Aug 2007 Posts: 20

I love when folks include the 'inside jokes' like "fallen madonna with the big boobies'. Allo, Allo? Are you there? LOL

Hello I'm New here! Joined: 07 Aug 2007 Posts: 9

Looks like Ive lost this one - Zenith bank's email address isn't working any more and Mrs Brown is ignoring me, despite my attempts to get her hospital address so i can send flowers. Although there is always the possibility that she has died 4 days earlier than expected Laughing