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 A safari in just 15 emails

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unimaginable bastard pig
unimaginable bastard pig

Joined: 24 Oct 2005
Posts: 4188
Location: Secret Lair

PostPosted: Tue Dec 27, 2005 5:32 pm Reply with quoteBack to top


This is my first safari. It was really easy to do. This safari just barely qualifies as a safari since the distance traveled is only about 350 miles, one way. But I am sure that this was a major pain in the ass for this guy and probably ended up costing him some money and pride.

From [email protected] Sat Nov 26 05:24:42 2005

Name:Peterson Zumas
Address: Project Implementation
Ministry of
Energy and Mineral Resources
B612/8 Cape Town
South Africa

Dear Sir/Madam,

It is my pleasure to write this letter to you. First, I must ask your
confidentiality in this transaction by virtue of it being utterly
confidential. I am Mr.Petersn Zumas a member of the South African Export
Promotion Council (SAEPC) who was with the government delegation to
europe during a bilateral trade conference.
I have decided to seek your assistance and co-operation in the
execution of a business transaction described here under for the benefit of all
parties and hope that you keep it confidential because of the nature of
the Transaction. We basically seek your assistance to front in the
transfer of US$30,500,000.00(Thirty Million, Five Hundred Thousand United
Dollars Only).

Source: I work as a Director of Project Implementation within the
Ministry of Energy and Mineral Resources and with co-operation of three
other top officials, we have in our possession an overdue payment in US
funds. The said funds represents certain percentage of the contract value
executed on behalf of my Ministry by a foreign contracting firm, which
we the officials over-invoiced by a total amount of US$30,500,000.00
(Thirty Million Five Hundred Thousand United States Dollars).
Though the actual contract cost has been paid to the original
contractor, leaving the excess balance unclaimed.
But by virtue of us being civil servants we cannot acquire this fund in
our names, Therefore I was delegated as a matter of trust by my
colleagues to look for an overseas partner into whose account we would
transfer the funds hence we are writing you this letter.
Our government is determined to pay foreign contractors all debts owed
so as to maintain continued good relations with both the foreign
governments and non government financial agencies.
We have decided to include our bills for approval with the co-operation
of some officials at the Department of Finance and the Reserve Bank Of
South Africa (RSVB).We hereby seek your assistance to act as the
beneficiary of the unclaimed funds since we are not allowed to operate a
foreign account. You will provide us with a good front and partnership to
process the remittance of the money to you as a form of contract
This process will be an internal arrangement with the departments
concerned and we will handle this here, your duty is to act as the
contractor and have the contract sum paid to you. I have the authority of my
partners to invite you into this matter and with your acceptance of our
invitation, your share as compensation will be 30%, and 70% will be for
The business itself \is 100% safe, fail proof and risk-free, provided
you treat it with utmost secrecy and you follow my instructions
carefully and religiously. Your area of business specialization does not matter
as it cannot hinder the successful execution of this transaction.
I hope I can put my confidence in you in this matter. Please contact me
on my private email: [email protected] to indicate your
willingness and capability to assist us.
Thank you for your anticipated co-operation and I await the receipt of
your message to enable me bring you into the complete picture of the
Yours faithfully,
Peterson Zuma.

From Kuhm Belcher Fri Dec 2 07:45:33 2005

Hello Mr. Zuma,

I am quite surprised to receive this letter from you. Have we ever met before? Well, if we have, you probably know that I am an aid worker for the [major charity name deleted]. What you probably do NOT know is that it is my job to acquire corporate funding for the [major charity name deleted], and apply that money to our, and other charitable causes. Therefore, your offer really sounds attractive to me. Believe it or not, I am in South Africa right now, not too far from you! I am at a [major charity name deleted] camp far in the North of your beautiful country. We are here assisting children whose parents have contracted AIDS. What a small world we live in.

This offer that you give me does not sound ethical at first. But since corporate money is so hard to come by lately, I am willing to do this with you. The money that I will receive from this business will go directly to the [major charity name deleted]. Why should it go to waste?

Thank you for your offer. Let me know if you want to continue with me.

Kuhm Belcher

From peterson zuma Sat Dec 3 02:53:49 2005

Dear Kuhm Belcher,

Compliments of the day, I will like to give you the step by step procedures of this transaction and how this transaction will go.

As you should know I want you to understand that this money in question is not mine and neither is it yours but I will like you to know that there is no risk involved as I know what and what is required for the transfer of this fund .since I know how this kind of fund is been transferred as people who have this kind of cases claim there fund and I know every informationís and details which is required.

My reason of involving you is for the safe keeping of this fund and also for you to provide me with your Account in your country where this fund will be transferred to for safe keeping and proper investment, but the most important issue is for you to guarantee me of your full support and allegiance to the confidentiality and sincerity that when this fund hits your Account you will not hesitate to inform me immediately. I will use my position here and my contact with the IT Manager who is also involved to manipulate the payment system, as he will input your details and informationís in the list of the Contractors who are due for payment of there claims,this is to show that you should be paid the claim. so immediately your Application is received your informationís will be in the DATA BASE of the payment system. So all documents to back up this claim will be provided by me if need be.

So befor we proceed further I will like to inform you that as you are currently here in South Africa it will be nice for us to have a meetting where we can discuss and get to know each other personally.

I will also like you to furnish me with the following details ;Your full name and country of origin,Your current telephone numbers here in South Africa to contact you with and also for you to let me know the date which you will like us to meet ans where.

Please feel very free to ask any questions if you donít understand anything.

Stay blessed and I will be expecting your urgent and considerable response.



From Kuhm Belcher Sat Dec 3 19:57:34 2005

Hello Peterson,

It is good to hear from you. I am just a little to the North of Messina, in the Northern-most part of your beautiful county. We right on the border with Zimbabwe. Since I am in the middle of some things here, I will be real brief. To answer your questions:

Name: Kuhm Belcher
Home Address: 102 Ocean Drive, Laguna Beach, CA 92371 USA
Age: 29
Sex: Male
Marital Status: Single
Occupation: Aid Worker
Home Phone: xxx-xxx-xxxx (never here)

I have a second number that may be easier to get hold of me. It is a US number that is forwarded to communications equipment here in our camp. The number is xxx-xxx-xxxx.

With this number, we are limited to certain times that non-[major charity name deleted] calls can be made. Unfortunately, these hours tend to be between 5am and 7am. On weekends from 1pm until about 4pm. Even with these limited hours, it should be the most reliable way to communicate if we are talking. Otherwise, you are right, email will work too.

Give me a time that you would like to talk. Perhaps on Sunday afternoon around 3pm? Perhaps you can call me then? Let me know. I do not know what time zone you are in. Where will you be calling from? I want to be near our commucications equipment when you call.


Kuhm Belcher

From peterson zuma Mon Dec 5 04:40:00 2005

Dear Kuhm Belcher,

Compliments of the day,I can now be very confident to deal with you,After reading your last mail I was delighted and happy that I have really found somebody to trust and for the fact that your job is about helping people in need and saving lives I can really trust with something of this nature.

Please I will still like to elaborate on the secrecy and confidentiality of this transaction until the fund is finally and safely transferred into your account in the united states. I will also like to thank you and encourage you on our establishing a lasting mutual relationship, thank you very much for the support.

Well I have been trying to reach you on the telephone numbers which you provided but it is difficult to get through to you can you give me a brief call so that we can discuss because as you well know I will like us to proceed immediately and also for me to enlighten you more about how this transaction can go.

My telephone numbers are:+0027-73-464-8003

Waiting for your urgent call.

Stay blessed.


From Kuhm Belcher Fri Dec 9 12:16:18 2005

Hi Peterson,

So sorry that it has been so long since I have written. I was called away to a canp in the country of Chad. What a depressing place.

I am back in South Africa now at our camp near Messina. It does not look like I am going to be able to leave to go anywhere for a while. We are grossly under-staffed here and these people really need our help. Can you come to Messina?


From peterson zuma Mon Dec 12 01:09:45 2005

Dear Kuhm Belcher,

Compliments of the day, I am very much okay with the suggestion which you made since I know your situation and I accept to come down to Mesina for us to have a meting towards the safe and final conclusion of this fund.

Listen I will like to let you know that I will be sending one official who will be taking care of the fund in question and the handling of the fund when it is been released from the Bank for onward Transfer to your Account in the United states, so as you can see it will be better if he visits you and explain everything about how the Transaction can be concluded.

The problem is that he want you to make a hotel reservation for him there in Mesina and also he request that his Transport and expenses be paid I am willing to assist but you have to give me your full co-operation as we are in this transaction together and must work hand in hand to achieve our aim.

So as soon as I receive your response I will then furnish you with his informationís that is contact details and when he will be coming down to Mesina to have the discussion with you, I think this is the best way we can go about the success of this Transaction.

Waiting for your urgent response.

Thanks and stay blessed.


From Kuhm Belcher Mon Dec 12 06:56:05 2005

Hello Peterson,

Whoever you send can stay with us in our camp. Our camp is very nice and this person will be very comfortable. I have been to Messina and I am not even sure that there is a hotel there. It seems way too small. This official will be provided with everything that they need. I will also reimburse all travel expenses. There is no problem with that. When this person arrives, I will give him twice as much as he spent getting there so he can easily pay his way back. What city is this person coming from?

I await your response.

Kuhm Belcher

From Kuhm Belcher Wed Dec 14 10:51:03 2005

Hi Peterson,

People have been asking me when we can be expecting our guest. When does your official intend to travel? I will need to speak to him first so he knows how to find us.

Kuhm Belcher

From peterson zuma Thu Dec 15 03:50:38 2005

Dear Kuhm Belcher,

Compliments of the day, I have received your email but I am quite confused with the contents as regards to you saying that people have been asking you about the visitor.

I hope you have not disclosed the Transaction to any body because that will jeopardize the whole effort which I have put in place to see that this fund is safely transferred.

So the situation now is that the official is still coming hopefully tomorrow as everything now about the success of this Transaction depends on you ,but he demands that you meet in a different place like a restaurant or a hotel around Mesina as he has refused to stay in a camp.

Secondly he demands that you send him the money that he will be using for transportation to come down to Mesina as he wants to know how serious you are and he will be coming from Johannesburg ,so you have to tell me where he can locate you when he gets to Messina and also you need to provide a telephone number with which he can reach you when he gets there in order not to be stranded.

As soon as I get your response I will forward to you his name and contact details for familiarity and also the money needed to book his ticket to Messina will cost about 1,000 Rand which he will also need to get his ticket down there tomorrow.

I believe that I can rely on you for the smooth conclusion of this Transaction.

Waiting for your urgent response soonest.



From Kuhm Belcher Thu Dec 15 05:31:18 2005

He is refusing to stay with us? Then you need to find someone else who will. We have very nice facilities here, nicer than anything in Messina. This seems very suspicious to me. As long as I have been doing this sort of work, I have never heard of someone unwilling to show their face at one of our base camps.

I have done a lot of business in Africa and I am fully aware how things work. I will send money for his travel expenses and he will never show up. I will be more than happy to pay for all of his expenses once he arrives.

If these terms are not acceptable to you, then you will need to find someone else to work with. Let me know.

Kuhm Belcher

From peterson zuma Fri Dec 16 07:49:44 2005

Dear Kuhm Belcher,

Compliments of the day,with reference to your last mail I will like to apologies for the message if it got to you in a bad way,most serious you should understand that this transaction is not a childís play and I also have to protect the interest of the official who will be coming over to discuss about the arrangements of how this fund will be moved out of South Africa to your custody for our safe keeping and proper onward investment which as I have explained earlier that you will be representing as my partner as I donít really have a lot of investment ideas.

So this was the demand of the official to know if you are serious or not but I have tried to convince him that you will give him every money he spent for the trip when he arrives messina to finalize discussions with you,please try and understand that my position is as stake here if you happen to let any body know about this transaction which is why I have solicited for you to keep everything between yourself until this fund is smoothly mover or transfer outside South Africa.

The official has agreed with me so he will be coming anytime from Monday to discuss with you,so I want you to tell me what informationís you need about him so that he does not have trouble in locating you.

I believe that you are a God sent person and that you will not do anything to jeopardize the safe conclusion of this transaction.

Looking forward to hearing from you.

Thanks and Stay blessed.


From Kuhm Belcher Fri Dec 16 10:44:34 2005

Hi Peterson,

Here are instructions on how to find us. I have attached a map for reference.

We are about 2 km to the West of the town of Messina. Messina is situated in the northern region of Northern Province. It's 530 kilometers north of Johannesburg, 18 kilometers south of the Beitbridge border with Zimbabwe and 545 kilometers south of Zimbabwe's capital, Harare.

Warn the official that is coming. Stay away from the women in Messina. HIV is all over the place here. Messina is the definitive example of an HIV-vulnerable area. That is why we are here. It has an army base to patrol the northern border, copper and diamond mines with migrant mineworkers, a huge trucking industry and a large sex work industry, attracting sex workers from the Northern Province and adjacent areas of Mozambique and Zimbabwe. Sex work and trucking are interwoven in Messina. Informal brothels are near the truck routes and truck stops. Sex workers wait at bars, hotels and truck parks. Stay away from them.

I have attached a copy of my passport for you to pass along to the official that is coming. This is the only photograph that I have here so this will have to do. I will provide this person with all travel costs plus some extra money just for going through the trouble of coming to see me. If he would like to stay for a day or two, he can do that as well. We can provide him with every comfort while he is here.

If there are any questions at all, please have him call me at this US number which is forwarded to our communications equipment. The number is xxx-xxx-xxxx.

If there is anything else I can do, please let me know. I look forward to his arrival on Monday. By the way, what is his name? If you have a photo of him to send me, that would be nice too. That way if I see someone wondering around that looks like him, I will stop him. If you don't have a photo, that is fine too.


Kuhm Belcher

Before you all flame me for sending a passport, it had his name scribbled across it in huge red letters. It is now useless to any scammer.

From Kuhm Belcher Sun Dec 18 09:35:15 2005

Hi Peterson,

Make sure that you pass along my phone number to the official that is coming just in case he is unable to find us.

The number is xxx-xxx-xxxx.

Kuhm Belcher

From peterson zuma Sun Dec 18 22:59:29 2005

Dear Kuhm Belcher,

Compliments of the day,I will like to let you know that I tried to call you yesterday as I was with the official who is coming and the telephone number that you gave to me is in voice message so I will be giving you the telephone number and name of the official as you will have to communicate with him constantly to be able to locate you.



Cell Phone number:078-111-8796

Please make sure that he is very comfortable when he arrives and also you have to ask him any question as he is a professional in handling this kind of transaction, hence he is the one who will help us in moving the consignment overseas without any trouble.

Don't forget what I told you about the confidentiality and secrecy of this transaction, this has to be maintained until the fund is safely moved and invested. this is very important for the success of this transaction.

Hoping to establishing a lasting mutual accord with you.

Stay blessed.


From peterson zuma Mon Dec 19 02:52:19 2005

Dear Khum Belcher,

I have just spoken to the official and he said that you must call him immediately to communicate with you as he will be arriving on Tuesday afternoon to Messina please call him asap and get back to me.

Stay blessed.



From Kuhm Belcher Mon Dec 19 06:43:51 2005

There is something wrong with Michael's phone? We can't get a connection to him. Is his phone on? This worries me that he cannot be easily reached. What is going on with him? We will keep trying throughout the evening.

Kuhm Belcher

From peterson zuma Mon Dec 19 09:21:44 2005

Dear Kuhm Belcher,

You are correct as I have confirm with Mr Michael about the condition of his telephone so he told me that he is getting another phone with a new sim card so here is the numbers (073-172-9475),but you have to call him tomorrow because he could only get a ticket for Thursday ,very sorry for the prosponment,so he will be arriving on Thursday evening and will be able to see you on Friday Monday.

This is the situation, I apologize for any inconvenience this might have caused you, please try and bear with me.

Stay blessed.



From Kuhm Belcher Mon Dec 19 09:44:32 2005


Thank you for the update. I was getting quite worried that we were unable to reach him. I thought that it was our equipment. When I get a few spare minutes, I will try the new number.

By the way Peterson, I just want you to know how greatful I am for you contacting me the way you did. You did not have to. I suppose that you could have picked anyone. I guess that it was just by the grace of God that you and I met. I want you to know that the $9 million that is supposed to be going to me, will actually be going to the [major charity name deleted].

I know that you asked me not to tell anyone about this but I have spoken with others here about your tremendous generosity. We all decided that in return for your generosity, we would like to provide to, a charity of your choice, $50,000.00 cash from the [major charity name deleted]. I am able to do this because not only is it my job to solicit funding for the [major charity name deleted], but it is also my job to dispurse the funds to other charitable organizations. I have done so many times in your country. We do not usually give this much to other charities but since you are going to provide us with years worth of funding, we thought that this was a fair amount to donate. Please let me know of the charity that you would like to help. When Michael arrives later this week, I can provide him with this money. He can forward this to you, and then you can pass it along to your charity.

Enjoy the rest of your evening.


Kuhm Belcher

From peterson zuma Tue Dec 20 06:52:46 2005

Dear Kuhm Belcher,

I have received your mail, although you did not do well by letting people to know about this transaction until the fund is transferred, anyway that is not the main issue here the issue is that Mr Micheal will be arriving late on Thursday evening and will be seeing you on Friday morning.

So you have to call Mr Micheal today as he is worried that he has not heard from you and wants to be sure that when he arrives Mesina on Thursday he will not be stranded.
his number is (073-172-9475).

Also your number which you gave to me is always in voice message, so I want to know what is happening you can also call me if you cannot reach Micheals phone ,please it is very important that we discuss before he arrives.

Your urgent response is needed.

Stay blessed.


From Kuhm Belcher Wed Dec 21 06:46:49 2005

Hi Peterson,

I am afraid that Mr. Michael is going to have to wait a little. All of our communication equipement, with the exception of Internet, is down right now. We are telling everyone that is scheduled to visit us to wait until all is working again for obvious safety issues. The next time you hear from me will be on the telephone. Please provide me with the phone number that you would like tme to call you with.

Sorry for the delay,

Kuhm Belcher

From peterson zuma Wed Dec 21 08:30:18 2005

Dear Kuhm Belcher,

Compliments of the season,That is very bad as the officer is much worried as he did not hear from you all this days and he is prepared to meet you on friday,but well it is fine that you wrote to inform us about the development,so you can reach me on ( 073-464-8003 ).

Stay Blessed.



From Kuhm Belcher Wed Dec 21 09:11:02 2005

Great. Thank you for your patience. And again, I sincerely apologize for any inconvenience.

Kuhm Belcher

There was a brief Skype call that I made to him. This was the clincher. I did not record the call.

From Kuhm Belcher Wed Dec 21 20:55:54 2005

Hi Peterson,

It was good to finally talk to you. I am looking forward to getting this business concluded. The money that we will make will be put to really good use. I hope that Mr. Michael will have a pleasant stay while he is here. Again, tell him to stay away from the bars and truck stops. Every woman there has AIDS.

Kuhm Belcher

From peterson zuma Wed Dec 21 23:11:34 2005

Dear Kuhm Belcher,

The pleasure is all mine as I can now be relaxed with the whole arrangement, you should understand that it is very important just like we discussed this morning that immediately you meet with Mr Micheal you have to call me to know what is going on and how the meeting went.

I also want you make sure that Mr Micheal has a pleasant stay with you and also I have instructed him to stay away from any woman while in Mesina.

I believe that you will like him as he is a very honest and obedient man, I have known him for a long time and we have been doing thing together here which is why I trust him and believe that he is the right person who can assist us in the safe conclusion of this transaction.

Stay Blessed and I hope to hear from you tomorrow.



From Kuhm Belcher Thu Dec 22 06:40:39 2005

One last thing... here is another phone number that can be used if needed. We got this one when our phones went down the other day. The number is another US number. It's 206-xxx-xxxx. If no one answers, you can always leave a message too. Messages are usually returned within a couple of minutes.

Kuhm Belcher

Yes. Please leave a message while you are wandering around aimlessly looking for people that are several thousands of miles away.

From peterson zuma Thu Dec 22 23:50:42 2005

Hello Belcher,

I have expected you to call Mr Micheal this morning as I told you yesterday that he will be arriving Messina this morning,he is in Messina now and cannot locate you,I have also call your two lines and cannot get through to you what is happening. He is currently on the FIRE STATION ON MI ROAD in messina.

If you know that you cannot goahead with this kindly let me know to ask Micheal to come back immediately.

Call me ASAP.



From Kuhm Belcher Fri Dec 23 05:25:22 2005

I can't seem to get a connection to anyone, not you, not Mr. Michael, not anyone. I waited here in camp for about four hours. Then I went towards town to look for him. I am going back towards the town right now to look for Mr. Michael. Since I do not know what he looks like, it may be a bit tough but I will do my best. Does he have the map I sent him?


Here are some of the messgaes that were left. Notice the increasing level of panic in the messages.

From peterson zuma Fri Dec 23 05:35:56 2005

Hello Again Mr Belcher,

I really don't believe what you are saying actually right away Mr Micheal is inside the Absa Bank in Messina as I just send him some money to come back to Johannesburg.

You are really a disappointment I cannot believe that after everything which we discussed you still betrayed me by allowing me send somebody down to Messina,You should have at least told me that you are not capable of handling this transaction.

Anyway if you think you are saying the truth you have to call me or Mr Micheal but if not you can forget about everything, as Mr Micheal will definitely be coming back today night as he will leave Messina in the evening today ,try and call him because I have been communicating with him all along toady.

It was quite a pleasure to speak with you, well I will like to say have a nice day.



From Kuhm Belcher Fri Dec 23 10:33:30 2005

Dear Peterson (or whatever your name really is),

Did your friend kick your ass when he got back from Messina? I hope so. All was well until we started looking into you and your story a bit closer. Then we saw what you were really up to. We made a few inquiries with some friends of ours in the South African governement and quickly realized that you were nothing more than a pice of shit, 419 scammer trying to steel from a charity that is trying to help the neediest of all of God's people. How can you live with yourself?

It was fun watching your stupid friend wander all around Messina. That looked hilarious. By the way, our friends in government are actually investigating this one. They asked us to follow him back home. Appearantly, messing with a group as big as the [major charity name deleted] was more than the governement was willing to ignore. Have fun in jail asshole. I hope that you get gang raped a thousand times. You deserve it.


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PostPosted: Sun Jan 01, 2006 3:14 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

Very nice, I especially enjoyed the gangrape reference. Would be quite nasty in an HIV-infested SA jail. He seemed quite ticked that he had to send money for his boy to come home from Messina.

"I wish you 12 months of happiness, 52 weeks of fun , 365 days of laughter, 8760 hours of favour, 525600 mins of success in 2006. be bless." - Prof. Charles Soludo
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