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 Fluolatex Nokia Dildophones and more...

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Opus
419Eater is my life


Joined: 04 Sep 2004
Posts: 279


PostPosted: Sat Dec 17, 2005 8:35 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

****Note: In reply to an email received at my business email address from a lad that I figured was out to purchase "anything" with a false or stolen credit card.
This was several months ago but I finally got around to formatting it for posting:


Dear Mr. Warners,

In reply to your inquiry, we do accept Visa. What quantity where you
interested in? We can ship to Nigeria. I am in charge of export so by using
my direct email it will simplify things.

Sincerely yours,

Mike Lewis

Quote:


Date:
Sat 10 Sep 2005 12:04:26 PM EDT
From:
kelly warners <[email protected]>
To:
[email protected] <[email protected]>
Subject:
WEBSITE NEEDED URGENTLY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


Hello Mike,

Thanks for your swift response,i got your message and it is quite
understood so kindly get back to me with your website for me to so select
the needed items and your prompt response will be highly appreciated.
Thanks,
Rgds,
Kelly.



****Note: I decided to use a sex toy website
-----------------------

Dear Kelly,

I apologize for my forgetfulness. Our web site is:

http://www.babeland.com/home

Simply forward your order to me along with your visa information and shipping details.

If I can be of further help, please do not hesitate to ask as we at Babeland are here to help you.

Sincerely yours,

Mike Lewis, Gen.Mgr.
Babeland.com

Quote:


Date:
Tue 13 Sep 2005 05:20:22 AM EDT
From:
kelly warners <[email protected]>

To:
[email protected] <[email protected]>
Subject:
TOTAL COST AND ASSISTANCE NEEDED !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


Hello Mike,

My apology for the late response it was due to the preparation of the
up coming trade show event and without much delay could you let me know the
total cost including shipping cost of the quantity below down to my office
in Nigeria Via EMS Speed post in order to forward you the credit card
information to charge for the payment. Moreso, I will like you to do me a
favour by getting the price of the phones below which I know is not in your
line of business but I only urge you to assist in buying the phones in other
to present the customers along with your products so as to promote the sales
of the products, I will be very appreciative if you can get me the total
cost of the items listed below and the phones at any nearby phone store at
the soonest time.

Crown Condoms - 6 Pack...................................20Pcs
Babeland Condoms - 3 Pack ..............................20pcs
Condom Cube by 2-5/8”; Lace overlay ................20pcs

5PCS OF THIS VIDEOS (DVD'S) ...
Island Fever 3
Velvet Thrust
Last Girl Standing
Behind the Green Door
Bend Over Boyfriend 2
Jenna Uncut & Uncensored

PHONE......
NOKIA 8800..............5pcs

Note. The quantity of the order above are just a samples and we shall later
call for the bulk order after the trade show and note that you will be
compensate with an attractive commission for the rally round on each price
you get on the phone. I await your sooner response toward the quote.
Shipping Address:
10,John street,
Via Post Office Rd,
Mushin
Lagos,Nigeria,
23401
Tel:234-01-4345172
My regards,
Kelly.



Dear Kelly,

First, let me appologies for not responding sooner. We at Babeland where affected by Hurricane Katerina and had to close for a while. Everything has been moped up and we are back in business.

Now, in regards to your order, I need some simple clarification.

1: Crown Condoms - 6 Pack...................................20Pcs
These come in Rhubarb flavor or our new Grandma's Olde Fashion Cinnamon Apple Strudel, as well as our regular Vanilla and Coca-Cola, Please advise which is your choice.

2: Babeland Condoms - 3 Pack ..............................20pcs
As you know, Babeland Condoms do not come in any flavor. They are designed for our Exceptionally Endowed customer. You did not state if you wish the Terminator (9") or the Barbarian (14") model.

3: Condom Cube by 2-5/8”; Lace overlay ................20pcs
The "Cube" is part of our crafts line. Please specify if you wish the pine cone and floral attachment, or the macrame model.

On the DVD's, Velvet Thrust is on back order so we could replace it with War and Piss which is quite popular with the urinal crowd. Also, Bend Over Boyfriend 2 has been banned and replaced with Pet Snake Lust, "An obsessive lust story of a man and his pet gartersnake".

Now, in regards to the phones, as you stated, we at Babeland are not in the telephone business, however we do have a new dildo that has cellular telephone capacity. This is not in our catalog as it has not yet been approved by the FCC. When a call comes in, the 6.5 volt vibrator switches on, and you can let it do its work while you cary on your conversation. They come in mauve or peach color. They are used widely in Canada and are quite popular. We cannot ship these to our U.S. customer but could ship to Nigeria. They are $175. each

The total cost of your order would be $1153.79, this includes all taxes and shipping cost.

I will await your choice from above instruction as well as your Visa information.

We at Babeland bid you a good day,

Mike Lewis
[email protected]

Quote:


Date:
Wed 28 Sep 2005 05:16:54 PM EDT
From:
kelly warners <[email protected]>

To:
[email protected] <[email protected]>
Subject:
TOTAL COST AND ASSISTANCE NEEDED !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


Hello Mike,

Thanks for your response and i'm highly sympathise with you over what
happened because we heard about it here too but i don't know you people are
affected once again i'm very highly sympathise you may GOD almighty be with
us in all our ways(AMEN)
However,here below are the items needed information:


1: Crown Condoms - 6 Pack/Vanilla or Coca-Cola..............20Pcs

2: Babeland Condoms - 3 Pack/ Terminator (9") 10pcs and the Barbarian (14")
model 10pcs.............20pcs

3: Condom Cube by 2-5/8”; Lace overlay/pine cone
and floral attachment 10pcs each ................20pcs

And the DVD'S the replacement are okay with me but concerning the cell
phones (NOKIA 8800)i know is not your line of business i just want you to
please help get so i can advice with payment of everything together because
there are too much of fake electronics products here and it is too expensive
that is why i'm seeking for your assistance over it and i will be very glad
if you can help get it.
I wait your prompt response now.
Thanks,
Rgds,
Kelly.


Hi Kelly,

Sorry about the delay as we are still cleaning up. And thanks for your prayer and understanding. We had just bought a huge stock of Brad Pitt Dildos, thats the one with the resemblance of his head at the end, and due to extreme humidity of the past weeks, the entire stock has deformed the latex heads to something completely different. We have had to re-name them the Jerry Falwell Dildo, but the mechanical system was unaffected. Since we have over 400 in stock, we have reduced the price to $79.99 each in quantities of 10. Would you be interested in purchasing some, because at this great price, they will not last long.

I notice that you chose the Condom Cube with pine cone and floral attachment. Good choice. I forgot to mention that they have the BMMP (Becosse Miniature Musical Pod) embedded and it comes with a choice of music:
1- Me Boomerang Won't Come Back
2- Theme from Madame Butterfly
Please advise of your choice. 1 or 2.

About the cell phones, as we are not licenced by the FCC for telephony retailing, we are not allowed to ship the product, EXCEPT if it's our approved item. You are in luck. Nokia is the manufacturer of our current Dildo Phone that I mentioned previously therefore I contacted their distributor in San Diego and he stated that it would be no problem to insert the electronics of Nokia 8800 into our Dildo model.

So with that great news, are you sure that five is enough or would you prefer upping your order to ten for a 10% discount.
Advise if you wish them in Mauve or Peach colour, and if you prefer the 9" or 12" or 17" model. The price is the same.

Lastly, due to the new homeland security regulation, we require you to print the African Application FR-884-B, fill it with a blue ball point or ink gel pen, date and sign it. And return along with the details of your order, Visa card information and shipping details.

I will await your response, and if you have any questions, please do not hesitate because we at Babeland aim to please.

Mike Lewis
[email protected]

----------------------------------------

United States Of America
Homeland Security African Application FR-884-B

Emergency Acceptance Application


Name:________________________________________________

*All questions must be answered

1. What is your age?

2. What is your height?

3. What is your weight?

4. What is your occupation or Job?

5. What is your marital status?

6. How many wives do you have.

7. How many wives have you divorced?

8. How many children do you have with all of your wives?

9. How many children have you sacrificed?

10. How many children have you sold?

11. How many children do you have left?

12. Have you ever had any difficulties with your neighbors.

13. How many neighbors have you killed?

14. Why have you killed your neighbors?

15. Has any neighbor ever came back to haunt you?

16. Complete the sentence: "Killing my neighbor..."

17. When where you arrested for killing your neighbor?

18. What religion do you currently belong to?

19. Since when does your religion participate in sacerdotal orgies?

20. Do your wives object to your participating in orgies?

21. When do you intend to retire?

22. When where you charged with stealing?

23. What did you steal?

24. What prison sentence did you received?

25. At what prison did you serve your sentence?

26. Have you ever purchased items from America?

27. Where those items eventually paid for?

28. When where you charged for not paying for those items?

29. What was your sentence for not paying for those items?

30. Will you return those items that you did not pay for?


____________________________________________________________________

I, the undersigned, swear that I have answered all 32 above questions with the maximum sincerity available to ma at the moment of signature.


X__________________________________________________________


Date_______________________________________________________

Quote:


Date:
Fri 30 Sep 2005 01:53:40 PM EDT
From:
kelly warners <[email protected]>

To:
[email protected] <[email protected]>
Subject:
TOTAL COST NEEDED URGENTLY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


Hello Mike,

Thanks for swift response,i got your your message and it is quite
understood so here below are requested items information:

Condom Cube with pine cone and floral attachment /mix the musical pod
1- Me Boomerang Won't Come Back
2- Theme from Madame Butterfly
3-Cell phones NOKIA 8800 & Brad Pitt Dildos / make it 10pcs each since it
attract 10% discount


But,concerning this form i have never heard of anything like this
before and moreso,most questions on this form sound somehow but anyhow i
don't have much to fill just get back to me with the total cost of
everything including the shipping charges first so i will know the exact
amount to be charge on my cc and your prompt response will be highly
appreciated.
Thanks,
Rgds,
Kelly.


Hi Kelly,

The total cost of your order taking into account the 10% discount on the Nokias is $2,947.37
This includes shipping and all taxes.

Please note that we are no longer allowed to call them Brad Pitt Dildo since the deformation, so they are now catalogued as the Jerry Falwell Dildo and I cannot take the order unless you order them under their proper name. State regulation.

Also, even though the Dildophone have the Nokia 8800 electronics, we are not allowed to call them that. We have to call them by their catalogue name "Fluolatex Dildophone model 88B". They also have to be ordered by their proper name.

Now, you will need to fill the form as I'm not allowed to ship outside the USA without it. I know that it's a pain Kelly but you know how bureaucracy works. You should see all the paperwork we have to comply with.

I will await your filled form along with your re-order under proper catalogue description.

If you have any questions, we at Babeland are here at your service.

Mike Lewis
[email protected]

Quote:


Date:
Mon 03 Oct 2005 04:58:39 PM EDT
From:
kelly warners <[email protected]>

To:
[email protected] <[email protected]>
Subject:
RE: TOTAL COST NEEDED URGENTLY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


Hello Mike,

Thanks for your response,i got your message but it is not much
clear to me so i will like you to confirm below my needed items:

1: Crown Condoms - 6 Pack/Vanilla
orCoca-Cola...................................................................................20Pcs
2: Babeland Condoms - 3 Pack/ Terminator (9") 10pcs and the Barbarian (14")
model 10pcs.............20pcs
3:Condom Cube by 2-5/8”; Lace overlay/pine cone and floral attachment 10pcs
each ......................20pcs
4:NOKIA
8800.....................................................................................................................................10PCS
5:Fluolatex Dildophone model
88B.......................................................................................................10pcs
6.DVD'S
Kindly confirm and get back to me with the final total cost of
everything so i can forward to you all the requested information.I wait your
prompt rtesponse now and it will be highly appreciated.
Thanks,
Rgds,
Kelly.


Dear Kelly,

Your order is ALMOST right. The Dildophones 88B ARE Nokias 8800, so it's not 10 of each but only 10 DILDOphone 88B. So if you will re-send the order and don't forget the proper catalogued name: "Fluolatex Dildophone model 88B" And please let us know if they are to be Fluorescent Green UFO Latex model, or the Furry Beaver Aunt Zelda model. This has to be clear in your order for your purchase to be valid.
Also, what happened to the discounted Jerry Falwell Dildos you already ordered in your last email? We have 450 of those put aside for you. They where included in the total price of: $2,947.37 we quoted.

And lastly, we still have not received the filled Homeland Security form without which we cannot conclude this transaction.

Hoping to read you soon Kelly, stay well and remember above all else that, we at Babeland are here to serve YOU.

Mike Lewis
Quote:


Date:
Wed 05 Oct 2005 01:32:40 PM EDT
From:
kelly warners <[email protected]>

To:
[email protected] <[email protected]>
Subject:
RESPONSE NEEDED URGENTLY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


Hello Mike,

Good and how are you?Hope the new HURICANE in america did not affect
your company again?And if not i will like to know the status of my order and
your prompt response will be highly appreciated.
Thanks,
Rgds,
Kelly.



Kelly,

We at Babeland will do our utmost to please our customer but we do have a limit to our patience. You are three correspondences behind as you are responding to a month old email.

Please note Kelly that we are putting a lot of effort into opening the Nigerian market and you could be our key to that market, but you will have to pay a bit more attention to your ordering details.

Please refer to our last email of earlier this week. We will await the proper detailed order information as requested along with the filled Homeland Security form. We can then ship within 48 hours.

We at Babeland sill await your filled order and form with much anticipation.

Mike Lewis
Quote:


Date:
Fri 07 Oct 2005 12:24:40 PM EDT
From:
kelly warners <[email protected]>

To:
[email protected] <[email protected]>
Subject:
GET BACK TO ME NOW !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


Hello Mike,

Thanks foryour swift response andi'm very sorry fornotget back to
you this while it was due to one reason or the other,you know the year is
going to an end so i'm very busy and concerning my order i just get you
right also no problem with the 450 pcs of Jerry Falwell Dildos i'm still
interested but i will prefer Fluorescent Green UFO Latex model for Fluolatex
Dildophone model 88B.
However,i will get back to you with the filled Homeland Security
form today and i will like you get back to me now if you are in the office
soi can forward also my credit card account number for you to charge for
payment of my order and your prompt response will be highly appreciated.
Thanks,
Rgds,
Kelly.
---------------
Hello Mike,
Good day and i'm mailing to confirm if you have receive the fax?I
wait your prompt response now.
Thanks,
Rgds,
Kelly.
---------------------
Date:
Sat 08 Oct 2005 12:42:20 PM EDT
From:
kelly warners <[email protected]>

To:
[email protected] <[email protected]>
Subject:
FAX NUMBER NEDEDED URGENTLY !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


Hello Mike,

Good day,Please let me have your fax number so can be able fax the
copy of the filled Homeland Security African Application Form because i have
already sent it to one number which i taught it was your number.Kindly get
back to me with your fax number now so i can forward it.
I wait your prompt response now.
Thanks,
Rgds,
Kelly.


Dear Kelly,

Our fax# is (Fax# of a local political party). That is the XXXXX office where we handle all the African shipment. You can fax if you like but we still require that you email the order AND the homeland security form because we have a Security Verisign Euphologic Maniguantation system which works only with email and is required for order validation.

Also, I'm happy to hear that you wish to double the Jerry Falwell Dildos so I put you down for 900 units. Just add $4,532. to your total.

I await your documents with religious patience because, at Babeland, that's just the way we are.

Mike Lewis
[email protected]
Quote:


Date:
Mon 10 Oct 2005 12:42:55 PM EDT
From:
kelly warners <[email protected]>

To:
[email protected] <[email protected]>
Subject:
filled form attached

Hello Mike,


Thanks for your swift response and the filled form has been attache
for you to print and get back to me now so i can forward my credit card
account number for you to charge.
Thanks,
Rgds,
Kelly



http://members.419eater.com/~opus/images/dct.jpg

---------------
Hi Kelly,
I received the filled Homeland Security Form. I now need the detailed order along with your credit card modalities.
We at Babeland anxiously await the opportunity to serve you.
Mike

Quote:

Date:
Wed 12 Oct 2005 06:56:07 AM EDT
From:
kelly warners <[email protected]>

To:
[email protected] <[email protected]>
Subject:
RESPONSE NEEDED URGENTLY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


Hello Mike,

Thanks for your swift response,i got your message and i want you
e-mail me back if you are in the office so i can forward the requested
information to you including my credit card account number for you to charge
but please for GOD sake don't expose my crdit card account number to any
other third party and i will like to do more business with you.
Thanks,
Rgds,
Kelly.


Hi Kelly,

Yes, you can forward your credit card information without fear. Our email is completely protected as we deal in over 172 million dollars a year in dildos alone. Please also forward the detailed order. I will acknowledge as soon as received, because at Babeland, we don't screw around when it comes to customer service.

Mike

Quote:


Date:
Thu 13 Oct 2005 01:22:15 PM EDT
From:
kelly warners <[email protected]>

To:
[email protected] <[email protected]>
Subject:
PAYMENT AND ORDER INFORMATION REQUESTED !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


Hello Mike,
Good day,i got your message and to avoid any further delay here
below is my credit card information for you to charge:

1: Crown Condoms - 6 Pack /Vanilla and Coca-Cola 10pcs
each.........................................20Pcs

2: Babeland Condoms - 3 Pack / Terminator (9") and the Barbarian (14")
model. 10pcs each....20pcs

3: Condom Cube by 2-5/8”; Lace overlay / pine cone and floral attachment
10pcs each........20pcs

4: ON THE DVD's ..........
War and Piss
Pet Snake Lust
Last Girl Standing
Behind the Green Door
Jenna Uncut & Uncensored

5:JERRY FALWELL DILDOS
...............................................................................45pcs
6:Fluolatex Dildophone model 88B / Fluorescent Green UFO Latex
model..................10pcs

Card Type:Master
Exp/Date:04/06
Account number#:xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Name On Card:Kelly Warners

Card Type:Master
Exp/Date:04/06
Account number#:xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Name On Card:Kelly Warners

Card Type:Master
Exp/Date:04/06
Account number#:xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Name On Card:Kelly Warners

Kindly split (equally) charge this above listed credit card and
get back to me with the shipping details.Moreso,please get it delete
immediately it is charged for security reasons and your prompt response will
be highly appreciated.
Thanks.
Rgds,
Kelly.


Hi Kelly,

Thank you for your order. It will be processed and shipped within 48 hours.

We will advise you when they have been shipped, and provide a tracking number.

Thank you for shopping at Babeland and have a great day.

Mike

Quote:


Date:
Fri 14 Oct 2005 06:08:27 AM EDT
From:
kelly warners <[email protected]>

To:
[email protected] <[email protected]>
Subject:
I WAIT YOUR PROMPT RESPONSE NOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


Hello Mike,

Thanks for your swift response and i wait your prompt response now.

Thanks,

Rgds,

Kelly.



Hi Kelly,

I was just about to email you. We are having a problem. All three Mastercards are refusing to acreddit the amount requested. Are you sure that they are not maxed out?

Please check with Mastercard. Perhaps you made some other purchases and forgot about them.

We will await your response and if you have any questions, please don't hesitate to ask because at Babeland, the customer is King.

Mike

----------------
****Note: The credit card numbers turned out to be from a CC# generating program, therefore ficticious.

Quote:


Date:
Fri 14 Oct 2005 11:03:58 AM EDT
From:
kelly warners <[email protected]>

To:
[email protected] <[email protected]>
Subject:
ISSUED BY VISA NOT MASTER !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


Hello Mike,

Thanks for zour swift response,i got your message but i don΄t know what is really going on because my credit card is issue my
visa not master so kindly re-run it and get back to me now to know what is going on.I wait your prompt response now.

Thanks,

Rgds,

Kelly.


****Note: Either this guy is an idiot or a badger baiting poor 'ol Opus. I decided to continue in the hope that he sends me real stolen CC numbers, so that I can report them.

Hi Kelly,
You previously stated:> Card Type:Master.
In any case, I tried to run them through Visa and it returns "Uncorroborated Card Holder Name". Are you sure you gave me the right information?

I await your reply with Babeland patience,

I have 75 pounds of condoms and dildos including the 10 Nokias sitting on the dock waiting for your reply so that shipping to Nigeria can proceed. Do I cancel your order or what?

Mike

Quote:

Date:
Sat 15 Oct 2005 10:16:28 AM EDT
From:
kelly warners <[email protected]>

To:
[email protected] <[email protected]>
Subject:
I`M STILL HIGHLY INTERESTED !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


Hello Mike,

Good day and thanks for your updating,i got your message but you can't cancel my order because i'm still interested just back to
me now if you are in the office because i'm about to call one of my client in usa may be he can handle the payment for me pending till monday that i will call my bank to know what is going on..I wait your prompt response now.

Thanks,

Rgds,

Kelly.


Hi Kelly,

Have you contacted your client in the USA and will he be handling payment. The 75 pounds of condoms and dildos and the Nokias are still on the shipping dock but I can't hold the order much longer.

Babeland thrives on customer service but there is a limit to our patience. We don't screw around with our latex so Please get back to me as to your decision so that I'll know if I should cancel your order or not.

Mike Lewis, Exporting Sales
[email protected]
www.babeland.com

Quote:


Date:
Mon 17 Oct 2005 08:19:41 AM EDT
From:
kelly warners <[email protected]>

To:
[email protected] <[email protected]>
Subject:
CHECK INFORMATION NEEDED !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


Hello Mike,

Thanks for your updating and for your concern,i really appreciate it.I called my bank this morning and i was told there is a mix-up
somewhere but to avoid any further delay kindly get back to me with this below requested information:

1.TOTAL COST

2.NAME AS TO APPEAR ON CHECK

3.CONTACT ADDRESS:

(a).STREET NAME

(b).STATE

(c).COUNTRY

(d).ZIP CODE

Once i get this information i will forward it to my client to get the check issue and send it out to you as soon as possible.I wait your prompt response now.

Thanks,

Rgds,

Kelly.


Hi Kelly,

I thought you where paying by credit card. You can pay by cheque if you wish but it will slow down your order. Our only branch that can accept checques is the British one. You would have to make the check to British Condoms and Dildos Unlimited, since that is our account name. The total amount of your order is: $7988.79 which includes tax and shipping cost.

The cheque has to be sent to our UK Chief Financial Officer, XXX XXXX, at the following address, along with a detailed copy of the order:

XXX XXXX, CFO, BL
Ste. XXX
x-x xxxxx Street
xxx, xxx xxx United Kingdom
(The above is a drop box in the UK)

Before sending the cheque, if you could fax a copy of it along with the detailed order to our Seatle office for lay-away orders, at:
(206) xxx-xxxx (my K7 fax#)
That will alow me to put your order aside on lay-away. And as soon as the UK office receive your cheque, they will notify me and I will then ship your order.

When ordering through lay-away, there are minimum quantity requirements so I had to do some adjustments. Your order now reads as follow:
------
1: Crown Condoms - 6 Pack / Rhesus Primate Scent and Coca-Cola = 10pcs each.........................................140Pcs

2: Babeland Condoms - 3 Pack / Terminator (9") and the Barbarian (14") model. = 10pcs each....140pcs

3: Condom Cube by 2-5/8”; Lace overlay / pine cone and floral attachment = 10pcs each........140pcs

4: ON THE DVD's ..........
War and Piss
Pet Snake Lust
Tricks For Win3.1
Fly Fishing for Beginners
Jenna Uncut & Uncensored

5:JERRY FALWELL DILDOS ...............................................................................245pcs
6:Fluolatex Dildophone model 88B / Fluorescent Green UFO Latex model..................20pcs
------

as you know, the Model 88B actually contains a Nokia 8800 mechanism.

Don't forget to fax a copy of the order along with a copy of the checque before mailing it.

After shipping, I will supply you with a tracking number.

I await your fax because at Babeland, we have infinite patience regardless of our customer's intellectual quotient as we understand the problems such quotient level can cause and sympathize.

Mike Lewis
[email protected]
www.babeland.com

Quote:


Date:
Tue 18 Oct 2005 08:17:03 AM EDT
From:
kelly warners <[email protected]>

To:
[email protected] <[email protected]>
Subject:
FINAL QUOTE REQUEST !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


Hello Mike,

Good day and thanks for your updating but how could you increase my order without my consent? and concerning the check sending to your UK office that will be a long process i will re-check with my bank today if everything have been put in-order so i can be able to pay with credit card.
Moreso,my friend advice me not to take the Fluolatex Dildophone model 88B as NOKIA 8800 he told me to tell you that you should get for me the exact LATEST NOKIA 8800 just 5pcs of it not Fluolatex Dildophone model 88B and presently i can not afford to order such large quantity and if it is compulsory for me to add more to my order here below are the quantities i can afford for now as my first order:

1: Crown Condoms - 6 Pack / Rhesus Primate Scent and Coca-Cola= 25pcs each...........50pcs

2: Babeland Condoms - 3 Pack / Terminator (9") and the Barbarian (14") model. =25pcs each....50pcs

3: Condom Cube by 2-5/8”; Lace overlay / pine cone and floral attachment = 25pcs each........50pcs

4: ON THE DVD's ..........
War and Piss.....................10pcs
Pet Snake Lust...................20pcs
Tricks For Win3.1 ...............10pcs
Fly Fishing for Beginners........10pcs

5:JERRY FALWELL DILDOS .........50pcs

6:NOKIA 8800....................5PCS



Kindly get back to me with the new total cost including the shipping charges and your prompt response will be highly appreciated.
Thanks,
Rgds,
Kelly.


Hi Kelly,

In reply to your query, the reason for uping the quantities had to do with our lay-away plan requirements. If you are to order by credit card, then your toned down order is indeed acceptable.

About the Fluolatex Dildophone 88B, they ARE Nokias 8800. The only difference being that they are incased in a first grade latex 17" dildo embedded with fluorescent particles. You can used the ultra-powerful embedded vibrator as a ringing device or in any other way you see fit. That is your business of course because at Babeland, we don't prod. Since their mechanism IS the N-8800 mechanism, they have full cellular functionality.
Our customers report total satisfaction with this product and it has won various awards for Nokia, and why not because, as you know, the N-8800 is an exceptional cell phone. The only complaints we have had where from a religious organization, and it had to do with embarrassment when used in public places, and that's something that I just can't understand because they are as beautiful as they are functional.
Now, due to FCC regulation, we cannot call them Nokia 8800 on our order forms, if we did, we would pay a major fine. So we have to refer to them by their proper catalog name which is "Fluolatex Dildophone model 88-B

I have revise your order to read:
1: Crown Condoms - 6 Pack / Rhesus Primate Scent and Coca-Cola= 25pcs each...........50pcs
2: Babeland Condoms - 3 Pack / Terminator (9") and the Barbarian (14") model. =25pcs each....50pcs
3: Condom Cube by 2-5/8”; Lace overlay / pine cone and floral attachment = 25pcs each........50pcs
4: ON THE DVD's ..........
War and Piss.....................10pcs
Pet Snake Lust...................20pcs
Tricks For Win3.1 ...............10pcs
Fly Fishing for Beginners........10pcs
5:JERRY FALWELL DILDOS .........50pcs (Jerry will be disappointed)
6:Fluolatex Dildophone 88-B....................5PCS

The total cost including tax and shipping has been revised also and is now: $3247.12

We will await your credit card information along with shipping address.

If there is anything else, please do not hesitate to ask because at Babeland, we enjoy serving a perversed clientele such as yourself,

Mike Lewis
[email protected]
www.babeland.com

ps/ By the way Kelly, I just want to add that because of the delay in processing this, you will need to fax your order to 1-206-xxx-xxxx as well as email me a copy.

ps2/ My supervisor advises me that unless your order is finalized by Monday, it will be terminated and the condoms, dildos and Nokias will be put back on the shelf. I must tell you that one your order is terminated (unlike when cancelled), you are put on a watchlist so that you can no longer order from any of our sales rep. It's adios amigos, you are blacklisted.

Quote:

Date: Mon 24 Oct 2005 04:21:39 PM EDT
From: kelly warners <[email protected]>

To: [email protected] <[email protected]>
Subject: RE: latex/Nokias order cancelled, account abolished

Hello Mike,

Good day,i got your message and hope my order have not been terminated?Please get back to me now i'm ready to give you credit card information now.

I wait your promt response now.

Thanks,

Rgds,

Kelly.


****Note: Enough already...

Kelly,
I have just received your abolition notice from head office. I'm afraid that's it for your order.
The latex and Nokias are back in the warehouse.
We will still be looking for someone to represent our product but I'm afraid it cannot be you.
Sorry about that, but I warned you.

Mike


>Kelly Warner, Nigeria
>Re: Order # BL-44929
>Cancellation # 00001210
>Customers with orders cancelled due to undelectability cannot re-order
>for a period of five years from date of said cancellation.
===============================================
****Note: He sent me another email a month later so I replied:

************************************************************************************************************
This is an automated reply. Please do not reply to this message.

Your email address:

[email protected]

has been blocked from the Babeland/myway accounts for reasons undetermined, and your email is being returned.
This applies to all Babeland/Myway accounts and is permanent.

We hope that you have been satisfied with Babeland customer service and bid you goodbye.

Babeland/Myway server webmaster
************************************************************************************************************

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MikeH
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PostPosted: Sun Dec 18, 2005 7:40 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

Boffo!

Put me down for a gross of dildophones, too. I'd like the Rugged Lumberjack Redwood model, with the optional Alien Intruder electroacoustic quasi-hermaphroditic attachments.

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PostPosted: Mon Dec 19, 2005 7:18 am Reply with quoteBack to top

♫ Ring ring ring ring ring ring ring Bananaphone... ♪

- Bill

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