Hello I'm New here!
Joined: 23 Nov 2005
Wed Nov 23, 2005 4:37 pm
I am Barrister Isaque ,a solicitor at law. I am the
personal Attorney To
Mr.Alex ziegler,a national of your country, On
Sunday, December 25, 2003 my
client was involved in an accident,Unfortunately he
lost his life,For more
information visit the below websit.
.I have contacted you to assist in repatriating the
money and property left
behind by my client before they get confiscated or
declared unserviceable by
the Bank where this huge deposit was lodged. The
bank where the deceased had
an account valued at about $2.6 million dollars Has
issued me a notice to
provide the next of kin or have the account
Confiscated within the next
twenty official working days.
Since I have been unsuccessful in locating the
relatives, I now seek your
consent to present you as the next of kin Of the
deceased since you are from
the same country, and you are having the same last
name with him so that
the Proceeds of this account valued at $2.6million
dollars can be paid to
you,subsequently to be shared among us If you
agree, we can discuss your
percentage. I have all necessary Legal documents
that can be used to back up
any claim,Kindly send to me the below informations-
a. Complete names
b. Private telephone number
c. Private fax number
d. Private email
All I require is your honest cooperation to enable
us seeing this deal
Through. I guarantee that this will beunder a
legitimate arrangement that
will protect you from any breach of the law.Please
your full contact address
and phone# is required for quick action.
Awaiting your .you can email me through my alternate
Please contact my personal attorney Mr.Samchee Beall
at the email address above to complete this
I have been re-directed by mr Ziegler, your
client, to take care of
the legal proceedings involved in the transfer of
the sum of $2.6m(two
million ,six hundred thousand united states
dollars only)This will involve
your physical presence at the Benin High Court
hence i advise you to make
your travel arrangements at once ,inform me then i
will intimate you on the
My telephone number is +229 60 48 25, you are free
to call me. i will like
you to send me your profile including your phone
number and your chambers
I look foward to a very early reply or call.
Im sorry but I will not be able to attend....I can
go ahead and send you the
money to get the funds ready for transfer....Its
funny this is like the 5th
one this week Ive won....I cant wait where do I
Mr. Beall: Please see that we discover who among our
staff can stand in our place for the hearing.
Mr. Isaque: What further will be required for proof
of authenticity in lieu of your synchronicity via
electricity? Electric Boogaloo.
We have found none amongst us great leader who can stand in your place....we have found a few who can sit however.
Will this be sufficent Mr. Barbeque?
Must for to stand is not? No one can see this either,
but perhaps we can adjust the travelling agenda for
Master Avery or perhaps Miss Stacy Kiebler? Please
discover is sending a woman is acceptable to the High
Isaac, do you know Captain Stuebing? Please
immediately forward your physical address, date of
birth, and your favorite color as a password for
future confidential dealings. The Conch Republic
maintains my private banking accounts, wit to which I
would prefer to have these funds travel by wire for
safekeeping, not to mention tax purposes and pickle
Onward and upward!!
I cant understand both yourself and your lawyer, i
rather insist we speek on the phone .You should give
me your phone numbers or call me on 22997604825.
This is rather not a childs play.
I am quite insulted that you would imply or insinuate
any immaturity in business dealings on the part of
myself or my representatives. You shall immediately
issue a public apology at your next court appearance
and forward to me the appropriate court transcription
citation that I may review at my leisure. Insomuch as
you are bringing this business dealing to me, and not
at my solicitation I shall further insist upon your
gratitude for our involvement.
Further insolence on your part will not be tolerated.
Oh no sir this is rather not the play of a child...this is the play of two grown men. We should now be able to meet you in Derkastan as previously agreed....If Admiral Ziegler does grace you with his presence there are a few stipulations that he must have waiting for him....
1. A 73oz bowl of M&M's...all of the browns must be removed
2. A Large Cape
3. Bunny Slippers with the name of his feet embroidered on them (Left & Right)
4. 16 Chocolate covered grasshoppers
5. A copy of Harry Pooter and the prisoner of ASSKABAN
If these requests are met, and waiting for him in an armored 73 stretched Gremlin with a man driving in a wookie costume....we will grace your country with our presence...further more....we would like to go to your newest disco upong arrival, once we arive the admiral only wants to hear the 1974 #1 hit by the BEEGEES, Stayin Alive, furthermore, that is the only song the disco is to play all night..........if all of these requests are accepted Capt Picard will land in Derkestand and negotiate the peace treaty of the Jihad.
Barrister Isaac: Upon further inspection of our email
exchanges I come to the conclusion that there is a
language barrier, specifically your mastery of English
and my lack of skills herewith. I was born two score
less 6 years ago in a fishing village on Lake Titicaca
in Nicaragua (Viva Che!) in a tribe of German Gypsy
immigrants. Our dialect of German Spanish is quite
difficult to translate directly to the proper English
that you so obviously are accustomed to.
Nevertheless, you should be assured that the hella big
monies this transaction promises are quite of the
interest to my people BUT I shall require the proper
pleasantries of official business transactions. You
are not likely to be understanding of these customs,
but I can aid you. In similarity to early marriage
anniversary gifts, we now are required to exchange
gifts of paper. My people require TP. You shall be
prepared to offer TP. Do you have TP? Do not
threaten me or my people. My people offer you no
resistance to proper business transactifying. Say to
who? Yes. You shall now travel to Oslo and await
further instructions at the Chalet. Now let me
describe further our communications. Your implication
that my business conduct is child's play is a serious
insult. I previously demanded you apologize for this.
The closest english translating for an apology, which
you may offer by email or letter, is thus: I
prostrate myself at the table of sincere apology with
serious repercussion; flatulating to the music I
humbly declare that the drunken retarded platypus of
pride whispered in my ear to do such things to myself
that I cannot repeat in the presence of women. With
these things said, I humbly beg for forgiveness of
Mr.Ziegler and Mr.Beall as they are men and I am but a
poodle. This must be done with clean hands and
shaven nipples. Shall you do these things
Mr.Barrister Isaque? Shall you beseech the nimble
business dealings or must I call upon the almighty
bunghole for retribution? Do not anger the bunghole
for it is wise and almighty. I await your reply
within the hour. It MUST have the subject line
"Seminiferous Tubloidial Buttnoids" or I will consider
you insolent and no longer fidelous to our enterprise.
Hello I'm New here!
Joined: 23 Nov 2005
Wed Nov 23, 2005 4:41 pm
Another one of our friends joined the fray....
Admiral, how do you speak such words in the presence of these insulant infedels from the East....Mr. Barbaque if you do understand the beautiful words spoken by admiral Cornholio let our master of speach Cthulhu deal with your insulance
Yea verily, I doth protest thy villainous slander! Thou shalt acquiesce to previous command of apology and prostrate thyself before and beg Herr Ziegler's forgiveness, lest thou be smoten in Divine retribution!
Furthermore, if thou art still desirous of a meeting with Rittmeister Ziegler, in addition to the aforementioned Rites of Apology, thou shall provide all items previously listed by Monsignor Ryan Beall, Esq. in advance. Requirements for delivery shall include the packaging of said items in playbills from the musical "Cats", printed entirely in Esperanto. They must also be shipped via first class courier sparrow.
Failure to comply to these Holy Commandments will result in an immediate military blockade of all canary shipments in and out of your fair nation.
Icht raziert mein affe.
419Eater is my life
Joined: 06 Oct 2005
Wed Nov 23, 2005 5:49 pm
I now need a new keyboard!
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