Author |
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Emeka Oganda
Guest
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Posted:
Sat Feb 14, 2004 8:03 pm |
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The esteemed Senator Adamu sent me the prototype "I have made the arrangements" letter after getting my "confidential personal information" ...
I am now going to try for my first trophy snapshot. The below letter from me to Senator Adamu sets forth the sign's requirements. There's also a cryptic shout out to one of my musical heroes, the late, great Warren Zevon.
I wonder if the Senator listens to a lot of Warren Zevon ...
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TO: Senator Adamu
FROM: Emeka Oganda
RE: I have made the arrangements...
My Esteemed Senator Adamu;
This is great news! Please remember, my African brother, that the information I give to you previous is VERY SECRET CONFIDENTIAL! I must be careful so as not to meet up with wrong kind of people and perhaps die accidentally like a martyr.
Before I discuss further how to send you money when you need it to effectively complete this transaction, I wanted to ask you if you knew of my Uncle Roland. He fought the Bantu as a brave soldier. There were many brave warriors. But of all the thompson-gunners, Roland was the best!
I have told my business secretary, Mr. Ahv'Ben Fuk'din Jail, abou the arrangement. He is the one who would take any cash mine and send it to you through the Western Union. You can trust him. There is a security protocall that Ahv'Ben Fuk'din Jail ALWAYS INSISTS UPON. THERE ARE NO EXCEPTIONS. Before he goes to the Western Union to send the funds, he NEEDS a photograph of you holding up a hand-lettered sign. This is what you will put EXACTLY on the sign!
His name: Ahv'Ben Fuk'din Jail
You MUST do this IMMEDIATELY BEFORE we sending you the money. AFTER HE GETS THE PHOTOGRAPH, and ONLY after he gets the photograph, then he send the money. It is $20,000.00 US Dollars, but if you need more, we would send it in anticipation of greater wealth later on. Please don't let something so small as getting Fuk'din Jail and sending the photograph slow this important business!
This is only to prevent the con men from behaving like warewolves. Of London and Tokyo I know little, but the New York is a dangerous city. So when Ahv'Ben Fuk'din Jail contacts you, immediately start preparing the photo. You will have to scan it and attach it to e-mail sent to ME. NO EXCEPTIONS! Your reward will be that my secretary will go to Western Union and IMMEDIATELY wire you $20,000.00 for which you shall make this deal happen. Remember, the key to me sending you the money you need is a simple hotograph of you holding a sign that says:
Ahv'Ben Fuk'din Jail
I know, my African brother, that soon I will be sending you the Western Union $20,000 . And I thank you for selecting me for who to trust much.
Peace to you, my black African brother!
I must go. My ride is here.
Mr. Emeka Oganda
Section 219 Imports
New York, NY |
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