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 Mugu 2000 (update: mugu left standing at airport)

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Via Caltha
Wannabe Baiter


Joined: 13 Nov 2004
Posts: 92
Location: England


PostPosted: Wed Jan 19, 2005 7:24 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

Obligatory disclaimer: This bait contains some strong language, and not just in English.

So this drops into my inbox. I've seen this specific letter a few times recently, but I'm concentrating my efforts on its first sender.

Quote:


I've never heard of Celestine as a male name, but I digress. Before we continue, I'd like to apologise for the lousy standard of my German. Mostly the product of Google Language Tools. It shouldn't be a problem considering that most lads barely even know English.

Quote:


(The street name is a direct translation of my screen name into German, and the postcode contains 419 backwards. He's based in Munich because it was chosen at random from the list of available @placename.com addresses on mail.com, and his name comes from a complicated department in-joke and doesn't specifically relate to the former Leeds United and England manager. That was a bit of good luck, especially when it came to making the "passport".)

Quote:


(The customer number. I ask him to quote this, but from experience he won't. Good slap material down the line. The reason for my choice of number should be clear from reading the numbers as letters.)

Quote:


My reply came in duplicate.

Quote:


Points 1 and 3 on the list I'd already given him Rolling Eyes , 2 I can sort with the mock passport, and as for the phone/fax number I'm just leaving it out for now.

Quote:


There was a deliberately bad fake passport jpg attached, which I'll post as soon as I figure out how to upload. In the meantime, I'll just have to wait and see what happens. Smile

_________________
"I have reported you to the member of your oasis mission in london through post and hoping that by tuesday the letter will get to the as well according to the currier service."
-- Rev Father Peter Richards

Last edited by Via Caltha on Thu Feb 17, 2005 10:28 pm; edited 4 times in total
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Via Caltha
Wannabe Baiter


Joined: 13 Nov 2004
Posts: 92
Location: England


PostPosted: Thu Jan 20, 2005 4:55 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

Well, he seems keen.

Quote:


Time to introduce a little speed-bump to drag this out a bit. A tree is blown onto the Munich office by a windstorm, in one of the best bits of timing ever. Enter the UK representative of Friedel-Crafts.

Quote:


By the way, the Dutch rep's name translates as "d!ckhead arsef*cker". Thanks to insultmonger.com for that one.

_________________
"I have reported you to the member of your oasis mission in london through post and hoping that by tuesday the letter will get to the as well according to the currier service."
-- Rev Father Peter Richards

Last edited by Via Caltha on Tue Feb 01, 2005 10:43 pm; edited 1 time in total
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Via Caltha
Wannabe Baiter


Joined: 13 Nov 2004
Posts: 92
Location: England


PostPosted: Sat Jan 22, 2005 1:56 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

I've got 2 replies. One was to Howard redirected to Jarvis, and went:

Quote:


The other was to Jarvis:

Quote:

_________________
"I have reported you to the member of your oasis mission in london through post and hoping that by tuesday the letter will get to the as well according to the currier service."
-- Rev Father Peter Richards
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Via Caltha
Wannabe Baiter


Joined: 13 Nov 2004
Posts: 92
Location: England


PostPosted: Sat Jan 22, 2005 2:29 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

So here we go.

Quote:

_________________
"I have reported you to the member of your oasis mission in london through post and hoping that by tuesday the letter will get to the as well according to the currier service."
-- Rev Father Peter Richards

Last edited by Via Caltha on Tue Feb 01, 2005 10:43 pm; edited 1 time in total
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bat^freak
419Eater is my life


Joined: 10 Jan 2004
Posts: 348
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PostPosted: Sat Jan 22, 2005 2:52 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

Scheisshaus Laughing
Great work.

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Via Caltha
Wannabe Baiter


Joined: 13 Nov 2004
Posts: 92
Location: England


PostPosted: Tue Jan 25, 2005 10:00 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

Well, I've got him worried. This arrives in Howard's inbox.

Quote:


Of course, Howard has recovered by now. I reply as him, with the new address (glad you liked it btw Very Happy ) at the top.

Quote:

_________________
"I have reported you to the member of your oasis mission in london through post and hoping that by tuesday the letter will get to the as well according to the currier service."
-- Rev Father Peter Richards
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Via Caltha
Wannabe Baiter


Joined: 13 Nov 2004
Posts: 92
Location: England


PostPosted: Wed Jan 26, 2005 10:22 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

What do you know? Looks like modalities are back on the menu:

Quote:


I've left the Yahoo footer in for irony value. Howard is, of course, only too willing to oblige. The CEO's name is the same as the Dutch rep's name earlier, only in German rather than Dutch, and the phone number belongs to a payphone at Munich central railway station. I don't know who if anyone will pick up, but it sure as hell won't be me.

Quote:


Dangle a bit (well, a lot) of money in front of the mugu and watch him run. The text file was a Pulp song that I'd run through the English to Lad Translator, and read thus:

Quote:


If can make sense of that, then I'll be shocked. The original filename on my PC is mugu2000.txt, but needless to say I renamed it before sending. Shocked

_________________
"I have reported you to the member of your oasis mission in london through post and hoping that by tuesday the letter will get to the as well according to the currier service."
-- Rev Father Peter Richards
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Via Caltha
Wannabe Baiter


Joined: 13 Nov 2004
Posts: 92
Location: England


PostPosted: Sat Jan 29, 2005 2:57 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

Well, no mention of "Mugu 2000" in his reply. Though that has given me a new title for this thread. ALLCAPS ALERT!

Quote:


Reply to be sent Monday. Smile

_________________
"I have reported you to the member of your oasis mission in london through post and hoping that by tuesday the letter will get to the as well according to the currier service."
-- Rev Father Peter Richards
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Via Caltha
Wannabe Baiter


Joined: 13 Nov 2004
Posts: 92
Location: England


PostPosted: Tue Feb 01, 2005 9:27 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

Or not. Figured it might be fun to keep him dangling for a bit. Twisted Evil

Quote:


About time I tried getting something from him, I think. And also time that got back in the picture. Literally.

Quote:

_________________
"I have reported you to the member of your oasis mission in london through post and hoping that by tuesday the letter will get to the as well according to the currier service."
-- Rev Father Peter Richards
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Via Caltha
Wannabe Baiter


Joined: 13 Nov 2004
Posts: 92
Location: England


PostPosted: Sat Feb 05, 2005 8:08 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

Quote:


I wonder why... Laughing Of course, the first law of baiting states that the problem is always at the lad's end:

Quote:


Chase the dangling financial carrot, mugu.

_________________
"I have reported you to the member of your oasis mission in london through post and hoping that by tuesday the letter will get to the as well according to the currier service."
-- Rev Father Peter Richards
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Via Caltha
Wannabe Baiter


Joined: 13 Nov 2004
Posts: 92
Location: England


PostPosted: Sun Feb 06, 2005 2:17 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

This is getting silly, but at least I'm wasting his time as he tries to ring that payphone...

Quote:


Quote:

_________________
"I have reported you to the member of your oasis mission in london through post and hoping that by tuesday the letter will get to the as well according to the currier service."
-- Rev Father Peter Richards
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labrat
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PostPosted: Mon Feb 07, 2005 12:47 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

Quote:


Ah, more Pulp gags - keep 'em up!
Via Caltha
Wannabe Baiter


Joined: 13 Nov 2004
Posts: 92
Location: England


PostPosted: Mon Feb 07, 2005 2:22 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

Will do indeed. I thought I'd lost the opportunity since he blew off that character, but that wasn't the case.

Welcome to the forum! Very Happy Wink

_________________
"I have reported you to the member of your oasis mission in london through post and hoping that by tuesday the letter will get to the as well according to the currier service."
-- Rev Father Peter Richards
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Via Caltha
Wannabe Baiter


Joined: 13 Nov 2004
Posts: 92
Location: England


PostPosted: Tue Feb 08, 2005 6:26 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

Quote:


I don't know why it's suddenly moved from Holland to Spain either. According to Google, doesn't exist, in Spain or anywhere else. The email address looks suspiciously like one of mail.com's @placename.com addresses, because I'm using two of them for this very bait. Laughing

_________________
"I have reported you to the member of your oasis mission in london through post and hoping that by tuesday the letter will get to the as well according to the currier service."
-- Rev Father Peter Richards
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Via Caltha
Wannabe Baiter


Joined: 13 Nov 2004
Posts: 92
Location: England


PostPosted: Wed Feb 09, 2005 1:07 am Reply with quoteBack to top

Quote:


The actual translation is more along the lines of "what idiot believes this bullshit".

_________________
"I have reported you to the member of your oasis mission in london through post and hoping that by tuesday the letter will get to the as well according to the currier service."
-- Rev Father Peter Richards
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Via Caltha
Wannabe Baiter


Joined: 13 Nov 2004
Posts: 92
Location: England


PostPosted: Wed Feb 09, 2005 8:05 am Reply with quoteBack to top

I've got this ready to send to the security company later on when "business opens".

Quote:


With a name like Celestine you didn't think I'd pass up an opportunity for a gender-bending gag, did you? I'm going by the "Esq" in the original post: if the lad actually is female then she's even denser than I'd hitherto given her credit for.

_________________
"I have reported you to the member of your oasis mission in london through post and hoping that by tuesday the letter will get to the as well according to the currier service."
-- Rev Father Peter Richards
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Via Caltha
Wannabe Baiter


Joined: 13 Nov 2004
Posts: 92
Location: England


PostPosted: Thu Feb 10, 2005 9:01 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

Quote:


Hadn't checked his/her/its other mailbox yet, I gather. I got this:

Image

Modalities indeed. I like how he forgot how to spell his own name. Quick reply.

Quote:


Needless to say, that Spanish bit isn't really a prayer. The actual translation, if Google Language Tools haven't fluffed, is:

Jarvis Cocker wrote:
I want to live like common people. I want to do whatever common people do. I want to sleep with common people. I want to sleep with common people like you.


That one's for labrat. Oh, and I "forgot" to attach the passport.

_________________
"I have reported you to the member of your oasis mission in london through post and hoping that by tuesday the letter will get to the as well according to the currier service."
-- Rev Father Peter Richards
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Via Caltha
Wannabe Baiter


Joined: 13 Nov 2004
Posts: 92
Location: England


PostPosted: Sun Feb 13, 2005 10:37 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

Why the bleep does he have to send everything as bulky picture attachments? Oh well, it's his bandwidth. I'm hardly likely to run out. Twisted Evil


The image is linked rather than embedded, to avoid WASS:
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v111/viacaltha/celestineletter2.gif

and a transcript:

Quote:


Also this from Celestine, who seems to be keeping up nicely the pretence of being someone separate from the supposedly Spanish (but blatantly not if he thinks Pulp lyrics are a prayer Laughing ) security trust person.

Quote:


So here we go. This to the guy in Madrid.

Quote:


Always take any opportunity to get your pets to stand in the arrivals section of a busy international airport in the middle of the afternoon, holding a sign that reads "suck my dick". The flight cited is, incidentally, genuine.

And this is to put Celestine's mind at rest:

Quote:


You can't tell me you didn't see the mis-ups joke coming a mile off.

_________________
"I have reported you to the member of your oasis mission in london through post and hoping that by tuesday the letter will get to the as well according to the currier service."
-- Rev Father Peter Richards
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labrat
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PostPosted: Mon Feb 14, 2005 11:29 am Reply with quoteBack to top

Good slap material - if this was really a European affair, they would use a '.' to separate thousands, not a ',' like us.

So he's asking for 18.5 Euros.

PS. Thanks for trying to translate Common People, even though it came out as Villager, it was still funny.

PPS. At the moment, you're classed as a 'Master Baiter' - is that meant to be a compliment?
Via Caltha
Wannabe Baiter


Joined: 13 Nov 2004
Posts: 92
Location: England


PostPosted: Mon Feb 14, 2005 11:34 am Reply with quoteBack to top

Maybe send something like this:

Quote:
Clarify that you are requesting the sum of €18,500 (eighteen and one half euros). Thank you.

_________________
"I have reported you to the member of your oasis mission in london through post and hoping that by tuesday the letter will get to the as well according to the currier service."
-- Rev Father Peter Richards
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Via Caltha
Wannabe Baiter


Joined: 13 Nov 2004
Posts: 92
Location: England


PostPosted: Mon Feb 14, 2005 7:45 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

And here's his latest ginormous GIF letter. Guess they've never heard of text attachments in Spain.

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v111/viacaltha/celestineletter3.gif

Quote:


Now to wait. Google tells me that the hotel is real and a 5 star to boot, so if they've really made the reservation I've wasted them a nice bit of money. Twisted Evil

_________________
"I have reported you to the member of your oasis mission in london through post and hoping that by tuesday the letter will get to the as well according to the currier service."
-- Rev Father Peter Richards
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labrat
Guest






PostPosted: Tue Feb 15, 2005 11:21 am Reply with quoteBack to top

I've dealt with this particular chain before:

their website is www.solmelia.com - but I don't know if reservations can be checked through it.
Via Caltha
Wannabe Baiter


Joined: 13 Nov 2004
Posts: 92
Location: England


PostPosted: Tue Feb 15, 2005 6:17 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

From Celestine:

Quote:


When did Seņor Gonzalez lose his doctorate? Probably the same place Howard seemed to mislay his. Speedy reply.

Quote:


Of course I shouldn't. It's only just over a tenner. Laughing

_________________
"I have reported you to the member of your oasis mission in london through post and hoping that by tuesday the letter will get to the as well according to the currier service."
-- Rev Father Peter Richards
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Via Caltha
Wannabe Baiter


Joined: 13 Nov 2004
Posts: 92
Location: England


PostPosted: Wed Feb 16, 2005 11:03 am Reply with quoteBack to top

Ayup. Celestine is worried about me, and I get this just as I'm waiting to board my flight at Munich airport. Or not.

Quote:


So I put his mind at rest, again.

Quote:

_________________
"I have reported you to the member of your oasis mission in london through post and hoping that by tuesday the letter will get to the as well according to the currier service."
-- Rev Father Peter Richards
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Via Caltha
Wannabe Baiter


Joined: 13 Nov 2004
Posts: 92
Location: England


PostPosted: Wed Feb 16, 2005 6:25 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

So now the security company are in a stress. Amazingly, Howard wasn't at Madrid airport this afternoon. Fancy that! Twisted Evil

Quote:


Of course it was their fault. Howard is in Madrid, but the modalities were all haywire.

Quote:


"An enemy of four one nine has taken your goat." Cheers to labrat for checking the translation.

This next one I sent to Celestine bcc'd to the fake security company.

Quote:

_________________
"I have reported you to the member of your oasis mission in london through post and hoping that by tuesday the letter will get to the as well according to the currier service."
-- Rev Father Peter Richards
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