Let it go.... "I, Sven, am not a gay!"

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Posted: Mon Jan 14, 2019 4:52 pm

17.30 - Sven, to my Cardinal Agnarr... I do not know if he's suspicious, or if he just tries to gain some time.

Quote:

Dear Sir,

I want to be more enlighten about the church

17.40 - Cardinal Agnarr, to our moron... I wrote him many rows, a complex compilation of various "religious" phrases and explanations taken from the internet

Quote:

Son, thank you for your message,

Our Evangelical Church is a Christian church based in Scotland, who believes in the Holy Lamb represented by Jesus Christ. We are a humble community of Christian faith. Today, all the Orthodox Christians are organized in autocephalous national orthodox churches (Greek, Scottish, Russian, Romanian, German, Serbian, etc.), in liturgical (eucharistic) communion with each other. Between the national Orthodox churches, the honorary primacy is held by the Ecumenical Patriarchate of Constantinople. According to the number of believers, the Orthodox form the second Christian community in the world after the Catholic Church.

The name of Orthodoxy comes from Greek, from ortho (right, right) and glory (doxa – glorification or, in a more general sense, opinion), thus translating literally “right-glory”, with the meaning of “Faith, right opinion” or “right-faith”. It is worth mentioning that some of the other Christian churches see their own teachings as righteous, or even the only righteous.

The foundations of Orthodox Christian theology were established during the first seven ecumenical synods, held between the 4th and 8th centuries. For religious, but also political, geographic and cultural reasons, between the Western (Roman Catholic) and the Eastern (Orthodox), a gradual formalized separation took place in 1054, known as the Great Schism. Following this event, both the Orthodox and the Catholic Church are considered to be the only universal (Orthodox or Catholic) and apostolic church, as well as the Orthodox-Orthodox believer. Unlike the Church of Rome, which emphasizes universality (Catholicity), the Orthodox emphasizes the purity of faith, from where the name difference.

The Evangelical Church of our Unique and Eternal Lamb is based on the Old and New Testaments. The leader (her “head”) is Jesus Christ, the Son of God, the “Good Shepherd” who guides the faithful, the living members of the Church, on the path to salvation. The Church of the Seven Ecumenical Councils recognizes the same Third World Father, the Father, the Son and the Holy Spirit, in the hypostasis (persons), but one in being (essence), the Almighty God, preexisting to the world and completely independent of everything, being so fundamental to the natural religions in which the god / gods are born in a pre-existing universe.

The Theology of the Evangelical Church of our Unique and Eternal Lamb of the Seven Councils is based on love, for “God is Love”, I John IV: 8 (I John 4: 8 ) and is resumed in the writings of Orthodox theologians, is love. Love was preached and revealed by works of Jesus Christ, considered one of the three hypostases (persons) of the Holy Trinity, who descended on the earth and became incarnate as a man, sacrificed his life and took upon him the sins of men He saved them from sin, and through his resurrection he transfigured and deified the human body. Thus, defining for the Orthodoxy the coming of Christ into the flesh is the formula of St. Athanasius the Great: “God has become man so that man may become God.” By word and deed, Christ has shown that he can live in the world by doing God’s will (“These have I spoken to you, that ye may have peace in me: in the world thou shalt have sorrows, but dare, I have overcome the world.” John 16: 33) and highlighted the Ten Commandments, but which encompass everything and which makes the one who performs them automatically and the rest: the love of God and of the neighbor (“He replied : Thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thy heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy mind: this is the great commandment, and the second, like this: Thou shalt love thy neighbor as thyself. these two commandments encompass all the law and prophets. “Matthew 22: 37-40)

I hope I have cleared you all your dilemmas and I assure you that our brother pastor Paul (from Liverpool) will be with you when you will come here. We are a great family, each of the brothers of our Faith taking care of the others. All we are brothers and sisters in Faith! I'm waiting for you to send the requested video, so we can move on to the concrete steps of your Admittance. I am very convinced that you too are anxious to be with your bride alongside us, in a new and beautiful life!

Be blessed my son,
Glory to the Holy Lamb!
Cardinal Agnarr

===

5 minutes later, our dear Sven answer:

Quote:

Dear Sir,

Thanks for all

Kind regards,
Sven

Cardinal Agnarr, again:

Quote:

My dear son,
May the Holy Lamb stand beside you and let your new life with your bride to be happy!
Glory to the Holy Lamb, glory to God!

Be blessed,
Cardinal Agnarr

===
I really hope to get another hilarious video file from him Laughing

... our intention (with this "church thread") is to keep this option for the moments following "the parcel sad events". Twisted Evil

Posted: Tue Jan 15, 2019 9:19 am

Tuesday

10.00 - Our moron was so silent so far so, just to make him happy, I moved his parcel to Cassablanca airport.
On Friday I will move it again, to Dakar. Laughing

Quote:

Dear Sven,
Today, the package # ***JHL5Z868I7*** has reached the commercial hub of Mohhamed V Airport - Cassablanca (Morrocco).

Thank you for using TSC, the finest in 5-Star Customer Service.
Claude

===

He also received "the confirmation" Laughing

... the bellow message was sent (from TSC servers, of course Twisted Evil

) to our idiot for 23 times. Laughing

Quote:

UPDATE: The parcel # ***JHL5Z868I7*** is located now in our warehouse at Mohhamed V International Airport in Cassablanca/Morroco. We will keep you up to date.

_____________________________________

COPYRIGHT SECURE NETWORKS 1997-2017
TSC LOGISTIC SERVICES

TSC has been providing wealthy individuals around the world in virtually every country with reliable, cost effective critical safari logistic solutions since 1997. Our safari specialists are available 24 hours per day, 7 days a week to help ensure your tents supplies and materials exactly where they need to be! Our exclusive TSC online tracking enables you to track, trace, monitor and confirm every move of your shipments yourself right from your desktop. This internet-based system offers a comprehensive solution for placing orders, accesing real-time flight status and viewing invoices.

Posted: Tue Jan 15, 2019 12:59 pm

Sven: Are you just getting home
I got mail from Rose
<rose's email>
Anna: Yes, I just came home.
Did you reply her?
Sven: I replied her when I got the first mail but on this am yet because am confused
Anna: why are you confused?
Sven: Did you branch somewhere
Anna: what do you mean?
Sven: That you are home late
Anna: but what do you mean with branch?
Sven: I mean do you go to somewhere before getting home
Anna: No, I told you I'd be home late
Sven: Ok
Have you eaten the
Anna: of course
What did you not understand about Rose's email?
Sven: How to get the costumes or something that will resemble it
Anna: did you discuss this with her?
Sven: I told her before but she keep insisting on the pictures
Anna: If this is the application process of course, you can't apply for an acting job without showing something
Sven: She told me to send the names to be written on the form now remaining the pictures
That is I was telling you am confused
Anna: As far as I can tell she wants you to fill out the form and send it to her already
did she tell you when you need to submit everything?
Sven: Yes
The setback is the pictures
On or before Friday
Anna: ok, then you have a few more days
Did you do the research she asked?
Sven: How is the smell now
Anna: it's a bit better. I asked you a question. I'm trying to help you here
Sven: Yes I did
The <censored> make me smile
Anna: haha, yes, that's cute
do you think you can pose in a way to show the characters?
Sven: You should know I will do the research before telling you its been hard
Anna: How should I know? You didn't tell me
Sven: They are not hard to pose but for the <censored>
You should read my mind and know what I can do because we share the same heart
Anna: hmm. I'll try
Rose says in her email that it's most important to show you can represent different characters. The costumes are less important
So try to find something that looks like it, or make something if you can, or maybe your mom can help you with that
Sven: Ok
Anna: you can always show rose before you make the pictures and ask her if it is ok.
The <censored> costume shouldn't be too hard. not much to it
Sven: Apart from the acting stuff did you make other jobs research
Look at you smiling
Anna: yes I did other research but nothing showed up yet, unless you want to pick up garbage, but that's not very nice
Sven: If I got the acting job and take you to location is this how you will be smiling at me
Ok
Anna: depends on what role you get
Sven: Good
Now I know you will make jest of me
I will allow you to stay home alone
Anna: I will never do that. I like looking at you, makes me happy. how is that wrong?
Sven: When am there can't I look for job with my certificate
Just kidding I will take you along when you are free
Looking at you will give me inspiration
Anna: you could, but it's better to have a job when you arrive. that way you won't have to be afraid of being sent back
Sven: You will get that before my arrival
Anna: thought that was what we were trying to do
Sven: Yes am just saying we shouldn't rely much on a job
Anna: And I think you need to grab the opportunity given to you and at least try to get the job
Sven: Honey won't you go to bed now
Sure I grab any opportunity
Anna: meaning you'll try to make the pictures needed for your application?
Sven: I will try that tomorrow
Anna: it makes me so happy that you are working for our future as well
Sven: That why am a man and that's is the goal of a man making his family comfortable
Anna: you're right and I'm happy that you are a good man
Sven: Am happy you are a good woman also
A woman who is ready to stand by his my side every time without relenting
Anna: yes of course, that's what a woman should do. Support her man and be there for him always
Sven: I love you Anna
Anna: love you too
Sven: Just can't wait to see you
On bed now?
Anna: yes, going to sleep soon
Sven: Hope you are not feeling cold
Anna: no I don't. where are you now?
Sven: Home
On bed also
Anna: I think I'm going to sleep. it's late
Sven: Are you there
Alright
Goodnight
Sweet dreams
Love you
Anna: love you too
good night

Posted: Tue Jan 15, 2019 5:34 pm

Our chat from today:

Sven: Good morning my queen, how was your night
Anna: it was good, thank you
I'm going to meet my pastor this morning to talk about our wedding
Sven: Good to hear
You did not me this before now
You're doing everything just to surprise me
Its good I will surprise you also
1:45 PM
Anna: So much is happening right now, I just forgot to tell you
Sven: You forgot to tell your fiance what is happening
4:12 PM
Anna: I know. It's busy now, but I'll tell you later
5:15 PM
Anna: are you there?
Sven: Yeah
How are you
Anna: I'm ok, you too?
Sven: Am good
How is work going
Anna: wait, I'll be right back
Sven: Ok
Anna: (after my call) I'm back
Sven: work is busy, I missed a few hours this morning because of the meeting with rev. Greenham
How was the meeting with him
Anna: It was good, we were talking about preparations for our wedding
Sven: Good
What are your plans
You said so much is happening
Anna: yes I mean since I met you a lot of things happened
we were talking about the sermon and it is customary in our church that bride and groom both sing a love song for eachother
Sven: Things like what honey
Really
Do you know how to sing
Anna: A little
Sven: Are we going to compose it or it's from the hymn book
Anna: He asked for you to record your song and send the video to our church secretary, so I won't see it before our wedding day. It has to be a surprise, but he wants to know if you can do the song he wanted you to sing
Sven: I will do that when am there
Seeing you will give me inspiration to sing
Anna: So you don't want to cooperate with the preparations for our wedding?
Sven: What do you mean I don't want to cooperate
Anna: because rev. Greenham made a request and you say you don't want to do it
Sven: I will have to know your church, how they want the song
You know some love song you can't sing it in church because of the words in it
Anna: he wanted you to sing this song. He picked it out so I'm sure it's ok
Aerosmith - I don't want to miss a thing
Sven: I will sing everything
Anna: Don't send it to me, I want it to be a surprise. 😘 Send it to Sister Dave
Sven: You want to know what song he wanted me to sing?
Yes
Anna: Bette middler - the rose
Sven: I will download the two and listen
Is that all about the meeting
Anna: We've been talking about us wanting a family and other plans for our future and he is happy that you are taking it all seriously and seem to be a devoted husband already
and he asked about something you needed to send to Cardinal Agnarr, something about answering the questions.
Sven: Yes
I want to know more about the church program because he ask me will I be a true member
How about your friends
Anna: it's better to ask him the substantive questions. he can best explain everything to you. Rev. Greenham also said he wants you to become a member of the church
what about my friends?
Sven: Am already a member but I want to know deep before becoming a devoted member
The rest questions are
Anna: when did you become a member of our church?
You didn't tell me that
Sven: So far you are a member am also a member
Anna: That's not the way it works here. Husband and wife become one in marriage but membership to the church is a personal matter, nobody else can do it for you
Sven: That's why am saying am not yet a devoted member, I will attend the church twice or thrice before that
I ask about your friends because of the wedding
I mean there plans for it
Anna: They'll be present at our wedding of course
And rev. Greenham made it clear that you'll have to become a member before we can get married
Sven: Okay
Anna: what does that mean?
Sven: Have heard what you said I will work on the video of the questions
Anna: is that the way he wanted it?
Sven: Yes I will send you the reply he sent to me
Anna: you sent that yesterday, but nothing about that
Sven: <the lines he needed to say in the video>
Anna: is this what you wrote to him?
Sven: No he did
Anna: Now I'm confused
Sven: Why are you confused
Anna: you said he requested a video, but I only see answers to questions
nevermind, just arrange it with him please, I have enough other things to worry about.
Sven: What are the things you are worried about
Anna: I have to look for a nice venue for our wedding party, the flowers, the redecorating of my home, finding you a job
so many things need to be done before our wedding
Sven: Yes honey
Just take it cool honey
Am already yours
Anna: I know, but I want it all to be perfect
did you email rose today about the job?
Sven: The party is just a day while our love is forever
Nope because my siblings were not around to take me the pictures we will do that compulsory tomorrow morning
Anna: and the form? You promised to contact her today.
I have a job and make all these arrangements. You are home all day doing nothing and just delaying things
Sven: No honey I want to send it all with the pictures
Am filling the form just remaining the pictures
Anna: And did you tell her that?
Sven: The pictures is important so all will get to her tomorrow morning
You should know I can't take it for granted I want everything well done
Anna: And I have told you that it's rude not to respond
It's like you don't take it seriously
Sven: I want to reply her with the form filled
Anna: hmm
Sven: Yes honey
So far she told me I must get it done before Friday
So the best answer is that I give her what she wants
Anna: Fine, if you think you know better then don't listen to my advice
Sven: Anna
Why won't I listen to you
You are my better half
Anna: I don't know why, but you don't

Posted: Tue Jan 15, 2019 10:46 pm

6:16
Sven: I should reply her now that's what you
Want
But Anna logged off already

8:19

Quote:

Hi Rose,

Am working on getting every document you requested for ready. I will get it across unfailingly tomorrow. Thanks

Kind regards,
Sven

9:03 PM
Sven: Honey I have be listening to the song since I love the lyrics but it's cunning
Anna: cunning how?
Sven: To get it once because of the intonation the singer used
Home?
Anna: what's wrong with it?
Sven: It's a lovely song
Nevermind
Am working on it to get it across soon
How was your day
Anna: my day was ok. some difficult clients
Sven: But are you able to convince them
Anna: maybe, don't know yet
what have you been doing today?
Sven: Nothing really just thinking about you and working on Rose requirements
Anna: can you show me?
Sven: The clothes am going to wear to take the pictures
Anna: if you want
Sven: I also speak with the traveling agent on how to make the visa fast
Immediately the money is paid
Anna: oh that's great
Sven: He said if I want it to be fast that means I will apply for tourist visa
Honey is something bothering you
Anna: yes, that is what I told you before. To get a tourist visa
Sven: Yeah
I pray I should be granted up to 8months
Anna: but we'll get married soon and then you can stay here anyway
Sven: Yes
I won't take much time I want to show you to the world how gorgeous you are made
Anna: I want that too
Sven: You are thinking of something
Anna: I need to eat something, I'll be back later
Sven: Good
Enjoy your meal
Anna: what did you think I was thinking of?
Sven: I just have the feeling that you are thinking about something
Anna: like what?
Sven: Don't know
What are you doing now
Anna: waiting for your answer
Sven: You're funny I just feel that but I don't know the exact thing
Nevermind
Are you bed now
Anna: yes I am
Sven: Hope you are not feeling lonely
Anna: yes I do
I want you here with me
Sven: Same here
I can't wait
I miss you so much
Anna: Miss you too. Do you know when the parcel will arrive?
Sven: No
But this morning the parcel is in Morocco
Anna: what's it doing there?
Sven: Just endure this loneliness for some time I will be there soon by God's grace
Anna: I know
Sven: Morocco Airport
Yesterday it was in Algeria airport
Anna: well. it's moving in the right direction at least
Sven: Yeah
They are passing through those countries just because they might have parcel to deliver there also
Anna: Maybe, I don't know
Sven: It may be here tomorrow or day after
By God's grace I will have the parcel this week
Anna: I hope so
Sven: What will you do if am there with you tonight
Anna: kiss you a lot
Sven: Hmm
We feel the same
Feeling dizzy?
Anna: from what?
Sven: was just thinking about what it would be like when you're here
I mean sleepy
Anna: yes I do
Sven: It will be so nice being there
We will share everything
Share thoughts, make plans
Anna: Yes, I can't wait. That's what we're preparing for all the time
Sven: Yes
I will be more than happy when you have my baby in you
Anna: yes, me too. We'll definitely need a bigger home then
Sven: Yes
Before then I will be able to cater for all
Anna: Yes, if you get the job you certainly will
Sven: I must get a job
Am not coming over to be home and coming to work and have an amazing family which start with you
Anna: yes, that's what you're trying right?
Sven: If I get the acting job, it can't be the only job I will be doing
Anna: why not? It pays well and with practice and performance I'm sure it'll take enough time. I want you home with me as well
Sven: Of course why won't I be home with you
Anna: if you want another job you won't be home very much
Sven: Do you know anyone doing the acting job
Not rose
Anna: I don't know actors. I don't even know rose. A coworker gave me her contact
Sven: Some time the acting might take half of the day
You might not be home by then
Anna: I'm sure I can work less hours when you're working as well
Sven: You know acting job will have me travelling around
Anna: I don't know about that. we'll see
Sven: Yeah
I can't wait to hug you for hours
Anna: me either, but now I'm tired and want to sleep
Sven: Alright Queenie
Good night
Love you
Anna: love you too

So at this point his tasks are:
- The video statement for cardinal Aggnar (tomorrow)
- The womans traditonal African wedding dress (when he finds it, have to press for this again)
- The love song video for pastor Greenham (asap)
- The application form and accompanying pictures for Rose (tomorrow)
- The pictures of the African statues for Anna (friday)
- ... did I forget anything? I hope our lad won't

Posted: Wed Jan 16, 2019 6:27 am

^^^ LOL!

- I'm afraid his parcel will not be moved until Friday, and then will be only a short route (to Dakar). Twisted Evil

- He was silent with my old cardinal, hoping to get the parcel and disappear... well, this is no good thing, I suppose. Twisted Evil

After all of our tasks will be accomplished, I think we can (finally) move his parcel to Niamey. Our moron will be delighted to hear that he must do one looong travel, I'm very sure of that. Laughing

Posted: Wed Jan 16, 2019 10:09 am

7:45 Sven: New day break and a new sun, Make us do the new run, So, begin this day with new laughter and fun, Good morning! 😘

9:55

Quote:

Hi Sven,

Thank you for your message. I'm waiting for your submission.

Cheers
Rose

10:13

Quote:

Hi Rose,

First Name: Sven
Last Name: TheRealOne
Address: ***** Akure Ondo State, Nigeria
City/state/zip: Akure, Ondo State
Cellphone: +23481353*****
Email: RealSven at gmail.com
Gender: Male
Ethnic descent: African
Height: 5ft65
Hair color: Black
Hair length: 3/8inch
Eye color: Brown
Skin color: Light
Shoe size: 42
Clothing size: Medium
Education: University Graduate
Job Experience: A year
Acting experience: stage act experience
Interest/Activities: Singing, Traveling,Acting
Music fiends of interest: Singer
Acting field of interest: Feature film, Musical and Commercial
Dance: Hip Hop, Classical
Languages: English, yoruba
Worth noting: Glasses
Relevant info ( tattoos,scars): None
Awards: None
Previous assignment: kingship, pastoral
Are you currently living in UK: No
Willing to move for the job: Yes
Most desire role to play: Supporting roles
Motivation: Determination, Songs

Pictures needed:

Can you guess the requested characters?
I wanted Tarzan, Superman, Dracula and Tinkerbell. Especially the last one isn't recognizable. He had to do better.

Sven: good morning
How are you
Anna: I'm ok. you too?
Same dear
Sven: Just done sending Rose requirements
How is work going
Anna: very good, I hope you get the job
work is ok
Sven: I hope too
Did you take your breakfast
Anna: yes I did. Did you?
Sven: Not yet, working on rosy requirements since I woke up
Anna: You should eat also, I want you to be healthy
Sven: I will
Anna: did you remember to look for the dress?
I'm looking at wedding dresses here, and I didn't decide yet whether I want one from here or the traditional African.
Sven: Yes I do
Can you put on traditional dress to church
No
Anna: an African one you mean?
Sven: Yes
Anna: I don't see a reason why not
Sven: I thought it's white wedding
Anna: It can be, but I didn't decide that yet. If you want white you should look for a white traditional dress
Sven: There is no white traditional dress I mean white garment used for wedding
Anna: I see
I want to know all my options before I decide
Sven: Ok

Quote:

Hi Sven,

Thank you for submitting your application. However this is not what I have requested from you. The form should be handwritten. If you don't have a printer you can write out the complete form and email me a scanned copy or a picture of it.

I know that you have problems with the costumes, and I told you this would be taken into consideration. However, the costumes you used aren't costumes at all, they are just regular clothes and you use the same for multiple characters. I attached some images as reference for you. Some guidelines to think about are:

- Superman: blue suit, red cape
- Tinkerbell: green dress, slippers with a white pompom
- Dracula: Stylish black suit with a black cape, for the picture you are allowed to include a woman with a red dress to show the character even better.
- Tarzan: Brown or beige loincloth.

These are just the basics and I'm sure you will find a way to use these and make your pictures a lot better. We will take into consideration your circumstances, so don't worry too much about it, but it's important to show your creativity and problem solving abilities, which are also vital on stage.

Remember to submit Friday at the latest, preferably before then.

Cheers,
Rose

Cardinal Agnarr to Sven

Quote:

Dear my son, I sadly notice that I have not yet received anything from you! Is there a problem with your desire to marry our young sister Anna? Please, you have to confess to me!
Son, your union is not possible if you are not a member of the community and pastor Paul has told me that you are already ready to come to the UK.
The admission formalities in our Congregation must be started in a timely manner, so that when you are here, everything to be already well prepared.

The official procedure of Admittance implies that you answer those questions in front of a superior member of the church. By wanting to speed up everything, I will accept a video statement in which you can say those sacred phrases. Please, it's important that you get dressed decent and filming done somewhere outside (in the natural light of the sun). That sacred words must be said intelligible, very loud and very clearly.

Please send me the video file as soon as possible, so that we can begin the actual admission formalities.
Be blessed my son, in the sacred name of our Holy Lamb!
Cardinal Agnarr

Sven: I got a mail from your cardinal and Rose
Anna: what did they say?
Sven: I will mail you
Anna: ok
Sven: Check your mail box
Anna: I was reading the mail you got from rose. I don't know what you submitted, but she's giving you good guidelines right?
Sven: There is no where to get all she requested for. To sing is not this hard when am not into acting before
Nigeria is quite different from UK here is Nigeria the film the act is different so how will I get the costume
I told her to wait till I arrive she insisted I do it on or before friday
My passion is for singing
Sing to make everyone and my angel happy
Anna: You could at least try
She said they know your circumstances and take it into account. so that means you don't need to use the exact things she said, but at least something that looks like it as closely as possible righ?
Sven: Yes but the closely she meant is that I must still use a suit
The difference is the design on it
Honey becalm there will be much better job there remember when am there you will have to see me often because of the wedding
Anna: And she knows it's hard to get costumes in Africa, so maybe, when she says you need to wear a black suit you can dress in all black clothes and use a piece of fabric for the cape
Sven: Not the job that will require more of my time
Anna: You have all the time in the world
Sven: The closing date is near for the first auction
Anna: I know, so start today
Sven: Ok
Honey rose is funny must I act as a superman, Dracula before I become an actor
Look at the picture of Dracula and Tarzan I sent
Anna: That's the whole point of being an actor... showing you can do different personalities
I see. Nice
Sven: Must I put on the clothes she requested for. This is not about clothes it's about the acting ability
Anna: Did she ask you to make the complete costumes? No, she asked you to use something resembling it so you can show the characters to your best ability
but I see you only make excuses not to do it.
Sven: Anna this is not about an excuse
Anna: looks like it
Sven: She demanded for the exact colors
Anna: I don't see the problem. You are the only one right now being difficult
Sven: Okay
Working on the church requirements
Anna:<thumbsup>
Sven: You're happy now

Posted: Wed Jan 16, 2019 10:24 am

^^^ LOL!

Our Sven is just a lazy moron who is trying to buy some time, to wait for that "very valuable package"... well, we will make sure things happen the right way.
Right? Laughing

Posted: Wed Jan 16, 2019 10:30 am

oh yes. The parcel will be delayed a bit till we have what we want from him. Lazy bastard.

Posted: Wed Jan 16, 2019 3:43 pm

This chat is spread out in parts over the whole afternoon

Sven: You're happy now
What are you doing now
You there
You decided to keep mute
Anna: In case you forgot, I have a job
Sven: Ok
You're funny Anna
Am out now just to get things right
You're here telling me I have no job
Must we rely on acting job only
Anna: I'm just reminding you that I have a job
I think you should grasp the opportunities God brings to our path. Don't you agree?

Sven: Thanks for letting me know
Sooner you will know how Nigeria looks like
Anna: Yes, I'd really love to see your country
Sven: No problem
Have not eaten since just because of the weak Anna
Can't we sort out other works for now
Should I send you the pictures of where I am now
Anna: sure show me
but I don't understand why you don't want to take this chance. You simply don't appreciate everything I've done for you
Sven: I swear Anna I appreciate all you've been doing
then why do you oppose it?
Sven: But regarding this work the procedures is giving me headache
Look at me under the sun just to search for the right stuff to use

Anna: looks like your under a roof

Anna: I'd advice you not to sit in that chair behind you on the second picture
Sven: Why did you say I should not to sit there
I was under the roof to know maybe I can get the stuff needed
Anna: nevermind
did you get it?
Sven: I will mind tell me
No
I was told it's hard to get superman lookalike dress
Anna: I can imagine that, but it's not so hard to completely dress in blue and use a red scarf or tablecloth or sheet or whatever you have at your disposal?
be creative.
Sven: OK madam
Am on my way home now
I will contact the guy that dress me up for the groom stuff then
Maybe I can get it
What are you doing
I ask you something you said never mind that show you don't want to show care right?
Hope you can get it.
Anna: I showed care but you didn't appreciate it
Sven: Really
I don't appreciate right?
Anna: you question my motives when I show care
Sven: Did I not appreciate you on this acting job even it get hard for me to get the requirements. I don't question your motives I only said are we going to rely on this job alone
Anna: yes, I already told you, for now we are, unless you want to pick up the garbage
Sven: Ok
Hope you are good
Hope work isn't that much
Anna: a lot that needs to be done today
how are you doing?
Sven: Weak
Anna: just be strong
Sven: I will
Miss you
Anna: I miss you too, but it won't be long till you're here. We need to be prepared
Sven: Yes
Have you finalize the wedding dress you are searching
Anna: no of course not. I'm waiting for you to send me a picture of the african one
Sven: We are using alfrican one here
Anna: yeah I figured that, but I didn't decide yet what to wear here for our wedding. So I still need those pictures you promised to make for me
Sven: I will do that
Just don't stress yourself much about the wedding.
Anna: I have to. A wedding won't arrange itself
Sven: You're right
But remember am not there now to look after you
Anna: I know, but you will soon
Sven: Yeah

the poor exhausted lad isn't used to doing much work I guess. But he is wearing Calvin Klein, so I don't really feel very sorry for him

Posted: Wed Jan 16, 2019 3:51 pm

^^^ LOL!

16.05 - Our moron wrote to my cardinal... it seems that tomorrow we'll have his new video-statement.

Quote:

Dear Sir,

I will do as you say I will the video across tomorrow. Sorry for the delay am working on it.
Thanks

Cardinal Agnarr:

Quote:

My son, it is fine, I'll wait for tomorrow.

Be blessed,
Cardinal Agnarr

===

Posted: Wed Jan 16, 2019 4:50 pm

Those pics are amazing. I really need to catch up on this bait. Laughing

Posted: Wed Jan 16, 2019 10:22 pm

This lad is so much fun. He gives the perfect opportunities to talk about the trophies he should deliver and he gives me a good excuse to be annoyed with him. Lazy moron.

10:25 PM
Sven: Where have you been
Anna: work and after I went to dinner with a coworker
Sven: It's good
how are you?
Just asking after me since when I told you I was weak
Hope you had fun with your co-worker
Anna: weak because you had to leave the house to find some clothes? Be serious
Sven: Really
Doing what now?
Anna: just relaxing
Sven: Good
Anna: what about you?
Sven: Watching TV
ok
You had fun without taking me along
Or telling me
Keep enjoying till i come
Anna: it wasn't planned, and do you expect me to put my whole life on hold until you are here? That won't be fair
Sven: And who said you should be your life on hold
Have you work on the song you were given by rev
Anna: I know it well. I'll practice it Sunday after the sermon together with the pianist
Sven: did you work on yours?
Do you have guest
Anna: no
Sven: Must I record it with pianist also
I have the lyrics already
Anna: would be nice if you could I think
Sven: You are preparing hard for the wedding
I told cardinal I will send the video he requested tomorrow
Anna: of course I am, I told you before. It's important to me
Sven: You told me what
Anna: that I am preparing for the wedding
Sven: Ok
It's until am there before a date can be fix right
Anna: yes that's right
but when we do most preparations now we won't have to wait long to get married when you're here
Sven: OK then
Just be good and remember I love you and I will alway do
Anna: Yes I know
Sven: You do
How do you know
Anna: because you told me silly
Sven: What about you
Anna: you still don't know?
Sven: Did I not know before I said it now
Anna: huh? YOu're not making sense now
Sven: Tell me something
What are the things you don't like to see in a man you love
Anna: being abusive, lazy and not supportive.
Sven: Hmmm
I love that

Posted: Wed Jan 16, 2019 10:31 pm

In that last set of pics, Sven is looking more and more like the infamous Shorty! How did you do that?

Posted: Wed Jan 16, 2019 10:33 pm

All I did was give him something useless to fill all that time he has. Don't forget that looking for some clothes is really exhausting. (I don't know shorty, so I have no idea how I did that)

Posted: Wed Jan 16, 2019 11:36 pm

I may have done a bad thing by mentioning Shorty...

Shorty is one an elite group - Lads who became so enmeshed in a bait that they couldn't escape, sometimes over a period of years. Other members include Hector, aka Turd, and Femmy.

Turd's adventures can be found in Eater's Greatest Hits; for Femmy, try https://forum.419eater.com/forum/viewtopic.php?t=247381

Shorty has so many threads, I can only offer this as a starting point: https://forum.419eater.com/forum/viewtopic.php?p=1791977#1791977

Posted: Thu Jan 17, 2019 4:25 am

The resemblance is uncanny...

Posted: Thu Jan 17, 2019 8:13 am

Thursday

09.00 - Our idiot wrote to manager Claude... Sven is anxious about the package. Laughing

Quote:

Dear Claude,

Am yet to receive any update since Tuesday

The TSC manager's first reply, today:

Quote:

Dear Sven,
I'll check immediatley and come back with details. In Africa, communications are not always accurate and effective.
Often, various logistical issues happen, and the truth behind these delays is hard to detect.
From the latest reports, it seems that the package is somewhere in Africa, between Morocco and Senegal.

Thank you for using TSC, the finest in 5-Star Customer Service.
Claude

===

On the other part of the story, sister Dave (the church secretary) writes to our idiot:

Quote:

Dear brother Sven,

Rev. Paul told me that you were going to record a song as preparation for your wedding with Anna and were supposed to send it to me. Can you please let me know when I can expect the video?
We are all working on preparations for your wedding and it's going to be a beautiful and blessed ceremony. Rev. Paul also asked about your favorite Bible verses, perhaps you can send us a handwritten list of 10 different Bible verses you like. He asked Anna to do the same and he will compare the list and choose from them what to use in the sermon. You can't discuss together or tell each other what verses you have chosen. This is a process with the guidance of the Holy Spirit.

Be blessed,
Sister Dave

Sven, to sister Dave:

Quote:

Dear Ma,

I will get back to you on the song and the Bible verses. Thanks

Be blessed,
Sven

Sister Dave:

Quote:

Dear brother Sven

I asked when I could expect you to send it to me. I'm fully convinced that you will my brother.
As I told you, we are busy with all the preparations for your wedding with sister Anna so it's important to stay on a schedule and know when to expect these things.
Other preparations are depending on it.

Be blessed,
Sister Dave

Our moron, to the church secretary:

Quote:

I will get it across unfailingly tomorrow. Thanks

We intend also to make the idiot learn / record some wedding Vows of Love: https://www.shutterfly.com/ideas/romantic-wedding-vows/
We hope to receive another fun trophies from him, before we start Operation "The long journey for The Parcel". Laughing

===

09.40 - Miss Rose (the talent scout) writes to Sven:

Quote:

Hi Sven
You're welcome. If you have any questions or need my advice, don't hesitate to ask. I'm here to help. Don't wait too long with your submission, Friday is tomorrow. I have seen in your pictures that you have talent and it would be a shame if you wouldn't get a chance because you're too late.

Cheers,
Rose

===

10.15 - My manager Claude writes to our dear Sven... the second message of the day:

Quote:

Dear Sven,

I can not get in touch with any of our African staff. The Local Managers (from Morocco and Senegal) did not respond to my messages, but the company servers that monitor the GPS position show that the package # ***JHL5Z868I7*** is still in the Cassablanca TSC-warehouse. Each of ours packages is provided with an electronic device that transmits the real GPS position in real time, so satellites retrieve this information and transmit it to our servers. The "geographical position on the map" is updated every hour and the distance deviation (error) does not exceed 2-300 meters.

I suppose that today, or tomorrow, your parcel will be transported to the next airport. There are many parcels delivered / picked up and these operations depend on local people. Sometimes, there are unjustified delays, but this is "the specific issues" and we can only solve the problem with patience.

Thank you for using TSC, the finest in 5-Star Customer Service.
Claude

===

12.30 - The slap of the day! Laughing

Quote:

Son, a good day is known from the early hours of the morning! Unfortunately, this is not the case today. Sven, let me tell you that I'm really disappointed on you!
The fact that you have not sent me (until now) the required video-material, makes me think that you're not decided about your marriage to our young sister Anna.
Son, our Church accepts only those who really want it! We do not beg anyone to enter our community, we only accept honest admissions requests!
If you do not want Anna anymore, it's enough to say that. You do not have to postpone things indefinitely, because this attitude is rude!

If you need 3 days to respond to a simple request, I do not think you are worthy of receiving the kissing of the Holy Lamb and I do not think our sister Anna needs to continue her relationship with you.
It seems incredible to me that you allow yourself to treat this delicate problem with so much superficiality! This type of attitude is intolerable and unacceptable.
Right now I'm going to contact our dear brother in Faith, pastor Paul, and I'll communicate to him my displeasure on you.
I will also recommend freezing the transportation of your parcel until all these blur and ambiguity have been clarified.
I do not want to accept that an unserious and unscrupulous man to enter between us. An apple that is sick will also spoil the healthy ones! I will not tolerate it!

Be blessed,
Cardinal Agnarr

===

14.00 - My manager Claude writes to our moron... it looks like the old cardinal Agnarr is very upset and he blocked the shipment.
Ohh, poor Sven, you're starting to have trouble in Paradis? Laughing

Quote:

Dear Sven,

I have just received a worrying message from our Cassablanca branch (in Morocco). Right now!
It seems that the package # ***JHL5Z868I7*** has received a FREEZE "red-flag" from the Sender.
The Moroccan TSC manager told me that your package was supposed to be transported to Senegal (Dakar) this night, but now it's stopped in TSC Cassablanca warehouse.
Do you know anything about this? What happens there?

Thank you for using TSC, the finest in 5-Star Customer Service.
Claude

===

Posted: Thu Jan 17, 2019 1:15 pm

Our Sven will be a very happy lad today. I didn't chat with him much, messenger shows that he hasn't been online for hours. This morning he only told me he has a busy day. Laughing

Posted: Thu Jan 17, 2019 1:29 pm

Ohh, he will quick learn that the Church authority cannot be ignored. We have a sacred hierarchy, who must be very well respected! Right? Laughing

The most saddest thing Twisted Evil

is that Anna has her hands tied and she can not intervene in favor of Sven. Poor idiot! Laughing

===

15.09 - Our idiot wrote to my cardinal, about "that video". Laughing

Quote:

Have just concluded the video you will get it in some minutes

5 minutes later, he's playing "innocence card" in front of Claude (TSC manager)... he really want "his" parcel. Laughing

Quote:

I don't know anything about this please do what you can do I want my parcel

My manager Claude:

Quote:

Dear Sven,

I do not know what is going on and, if The Sender blocks the transport, I can not intervene.
You need to get in touch with The Sender and fix this curious situation.
In these cases (frozen transport), parcels are returned back to their home country after a 3-5 day of waiting period.

Thank you for using TSC, the finest in 5-Star Customer Service.
Claude

The idiot sent previous Claude's message to Anna... the young woman is puzzled and understands nothing. Laughing

Quote:

Honey, what's going on? The sender is rev. Paul, why would he do this? What did you say to him?

The moron, to Claude:

Quote:

Thank you for your response.

The moron, to Anna... he claims to have been very busy with Rose (talent scout). Laughing

Quote:

It's all about the delay of the video Cardinal requested for. The video delayed because of Rose requirements that I went to look for

Anna:

Quote:

What did you tell Cardinal Agnarr that made him do this?

Today is a hard day for him. Laughing

Posted: Thu Jan 17, 2019 2:46 pm

We have another video! Sent both to sister Dave and the cardinal Laughing

Sven answering the Cardinal's questions

Sven to Anna

Quote:

I told him I will send him the video this morning which I went out. But now have sent him the video

Anna to Sven

Quote:

Obviously you forgot to tell him this morning that you were going to send it later today.

Sven

Quote:

Yes honey, tomorrow is the deadline Rosy gave and I had to rush to a place where I can get the stuff needed. I forgot to send him a mail

Quote:

Did you contact him now

Anna

Quote:

Who?

Posted: Thu Jan 17, 2019 2:46 pm

Another trophy!

Sven, asking permission to join the church and marry Anna: ~~~THE MOVIE~~~

===

15.27 - Sven, sending the movie to cardinal Agnarr... Unfortunately, the cardinal will read the message only tomorrow morning ... the package remains for now in Morocco.

Quote:

Dear Sir,

Sorry for the delay

Edit: Is the same movie. Laughing

===

15.55 - Sven, to my cardinal:

Quote:

Dear Sir,

I forgot to send you a mail I went out to get some tools which I needed to submit today which tomorrow is the deadline. That was why I couldn't get the video across as promise so sorry Cardinal such won't repeat itself. Thanks

Kinds Regards
Sven

===

Posted: Thu Jan 17, 2019 3:31 pm

Sven to Emma

Quote:

Rev and Cardinal

Emma to Sven

Quote:

Why me? I didn't mess this up. You should contact them yourself and explain.

Sven to Emma

Quote:

Have done that

Emma to Sven

Quote:

So why do you need to disturb me with that request? I"m working and it's very busy right now

Posted: Thu Jan 17, 2019 4:50 pm

Hoping that "his delicate" problem has been resolved, Sven writes to Claude:

Quote:

Did you get any update from the sender

Claude's answer:

Quote:

Dear Sven,

I have nothing new to communicate, the situation is stationary.
Did you get in touch with The Sender?
If you solved the problem, then I'm sure everything will be fine.

Thank you for using TSC, the finest in 5-Star Customer Service.
Claude

Sven, very polite.

Quote:

Okay thank you

===

Tomorrow morning, the old cardinal will accept Sven's excuses and will allow the resumption of transport. Laughing

Of course, the dear Sven will have to make a penance: write the prayer Pater Noster - by hand - for 30 times. Laughing

Posted: Thu Jan 17, 2019 5:01 pm

Sister Dave in response to the video Sven sent her

Quote:

Dear Brother Sven,

Thank you for sending this. I will send it to Cardinal Agnarr.
Do you know what I can tell rev. Greenham about when he can expect you to send the video of the song and the 10 Bible verses? Anna promised to send hers this evening.

Be blessed,
Sister Dave

Quote:

Am already on mine now no more delay. I get it across on some hours time today. Please inform reverend that the first video delayed because i need to submit some requirements about the work I will do when am in England in which the deadline is tomorrow. I got an update for the parcel that there is red flag on it by the sender. Thanks

Kind regards,
Sven

Anna: Did you get response from cardinal Agnarr after you explained what happened?
Sven: Nope
Only from dave
Anna: so nothing changed about the parcel?
Sven: The company said they are yet to receive any update from the sender
Anna: ok, so we have to wait.
did you make the pictures for rose today?
Sven: Ok
Working on the song and bible verses
I have the colors needed now
Anna: colors?
oh, for the clothes?
Sven: Yes
Anna: did Dave send you a message about the Bible verses as well?
I'm going to work on mine this evening
Sven: I will send the verses with the video this evening
Anna: That's good. At least our wedding preparations won't have any more delays
Sven: So I will have time to complete Rose requirements
Sven: Yeah
Anna: yes, have you finished that?
Sven: What
Anna: the pictures for Rose
Sven: Not yet I will get it across tonight
Anna: so tomorrow you'll have time enough to look for that statues you promised me
Sven: (long pause) Are you not busy now
Anna: Yes I am, but I want to know what's going on

Let it go.... "I, Sven, am not a gay!"	View next topic View previous topic