Author |
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Lake Amour
Master of Master Baiters
Joined: 17 Mar 2017
Posts: 524
Location: The Orphanage
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Posted:
Wed Aug 08, 2018 12:25 am |
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Miss Connie is working the books and thinks it may need to get pushed to 2000 years. Fiddler on the Roof is putting a dent in the orphanage's finances at the moment.
Might as well pit the three offers against each other. Whichever of the lad's characters can come up with a video of If I Were A Rich Man, thus helping Eliot's chances at landing the role, gets the loan. |
_________________ Mr Hump Here's Audio Book Collection
"Some of my co workers are beginning to say that you are making a fool of me but I strongly believe you" - Mr Hump Here
"You and your orphanage has destroyed my perfect life" - Mr Hump Here
"Also beside the rear entry as a quicker way to get Fellatio, is there any other thing you need?" - Mr Hump Here
"EAT SHIT AND FUCK YOURSELF WITH RUBBISH." - Tom Sawyer
Team Humphere |
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MrMystery314
Djinn and Tonic
Joined: 13 Dec 2014
Posts: 2077
Location: Herding penguins
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Posted:
Wed Aug 08, 2018 12:47 am |
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I don't think even Humphere was this stupid, but his brain may have atrophied from the "grape" level to the "shriveled raisin" level. How does this lad, Humphere or not, not wonder why the orphans have any control over who gives a loan to the orphanage? This is going to be a hilarious bait if it wasn't already funny.
Edit: Here's an interesting idea that I just came up with based on one of Padme's old baits: language lessons. The orphanage already has Spanish and French teachers, so once Pastor B learns that our lad is from Nigeria and most likely speaks Igbo, he asks if the lad can record some videos teaching the alphabet and basic phrases. It's kind of random, but it could be another time waster as the lad helps more and more with the orphans' education. |
_________________ π π¦ π° π° π° x26
"ALL THE SAME NOT AN UNGRATEFUL BITCH"-Mr. Humphere
"Bro i have seen hell"-Mr. Humphere
"Also i know how inquisitive all this press can be, i hope the picture of the goat fucking me is not on news or news paper"-Mr. Humphere
"GO TO HELL JUSTIN for having played with me all these while, what the fuck is wrong with you you are such as an asshole"-Charles J Colocino JR
"I will tell you I'm a computer illiterate I know more than you" - Eric Marshall
Hello! ~Kitty |
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Jayhawk
Baiting Guru
Joined: 07 Jul 2006
Posts: 5727
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Posted:
Wed Aug 08, 2018 1:55 am |
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I am going to brush off his Yolanda Adams character. We stand no chance of getting him to do a video if I stay in contact with "her."
Andrew Davis gets back to me regarding musical theater
Hello B
Thanks for your mail it's well understood, I was very good at stage performance management of musical theater to make sure the stage is very planed in order!
My regards to all the orphans
I am sorry but I cannot do business with you. According to the orphan Elliot stage management is for losers and we should only do business with those that know what it's like to experience the bright lights and wear the greasepaint .
I wonder if I can get him to stage an entire Broadway musical. |
_________________ x8 < slacking?
just checked the site for update now, shipment smurfs in Porto Novo. Yes!! - Stanley
i will not share my smurfs with anybody again - Stanley (again)
Yes pets are allowed as far as you will occupy the apartment alone, you can release the Kraken.
i will kill you even if it take me to go to jail i will do that because i hate you with all my life....
assisin killer to Feathers McGraw
PLEASE I BEG YOU TO LET ME KNOW THAT PIGGIES OF YOURS PLEASE... assisin killer to Feathers again
x5 Team Humphere
Long Live Silver Peak Orphanage! - Loan Lad Langwenya Andile
Last edited by Jayhawk on Wed Aug 08, 2018 2:17 pm; edited 1 time in total |
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Jayhawk
Baiting Guru
Joined: 07 Jul 2006
Posts: 5727
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Posted:
Wed Aug 08, 2018 2:04 am |
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Five minutes after I sent the email to Andrew Davis I got the same original email from Yolanda Adams offering the loan. Pastor B is not a happy camper.
I cannot believe you would take the name of a famous and well respected performer like Yolanda Adams in an attempt to rip off an orphanage. You should be ashamed of yourself.
I will let him stew for a little while before letting his first character know he is back in. |
_________________ x8 < slacking?
just checked the site for update now, shipment smurfs in Porto Novo. Yes!! - Stanley
i will not share my smurfs with anybody again - Stanley (again)
Yes pets are allowed as far as you will occupy the apartment alone, you can release the Kraken.
i will kill you even if it take me to go to jail i will do that because i hate you with all my life....
assisin killer to Feathers McGraw
PLEASE I BEG YOU TO LET ME KNOW THAT PIGGIES OF YOURS PLEASE... assisin killer to Feathers again
x5 Team Humphere
Long Live Silver Peak Orphanage! - Loan Lad Langwenya Andile |
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MrMystery314
Djinn and Tonic
Joined: 13 Dec 2014
Posts: 2077
Location: Herding penguins
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Posted:
Wed Aug 08, 2018 2:18 am |
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Hey, don't insult stage managers! The crew works hard even if they aren't on stage. On a more serious note, staging a musical would be hilarious. I nominate "The Producers," if only because having a bunch of lads sing things like "look out, here comes the master race!" would make Eater history. Maybe I'm too ambitious, but there is no doubt about it, this lad must do something related to a musical. Once again, his stupidity astounds me; he's getting completely sidetracked from the loan itself. |
_________________ π π¦ π° π° π° x26
"ALL THE SAME NOT AN UNGRATEFUL BITCH"-Mr. Humphere
"Bro i have seen hell"-Mr. Humphere
"Also i know how inquisitive all this press can be, i hope the picture of the goat fucking me is not on news or news paper"-Mr. Humphere
"GO TO HELL JUSTIN for having played with me all these while, what the fuck is wrong with you you are such as an asshole"-Charles J Colocino JR
"I will tell you I'm a computer illiterate I know more than you" - Eric Marshall
Hello! ~Kitty |
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Jayhawk
Baiting Guru
Joined: 07 Jul 2006
Posts: 5727
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Posted:
Wed Aug 08, 2018 2:31 am |
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^^ I really want him to sing If I was a Rich Man from Fiddler. My second choice would be a bunch of lads walking around singing Anatevka, also from Fiddler. |
_________________ x8 < slacking?
just checked the site for update now, shipment smurfs in Porto Novo. Yes!! - Stanley
i will not share my smurfs with anybody again - Stanley (again)
Yes pets are allowed as far as you will occupy the apartment alone, you can release the Kraken.
i will kill you even if it take me to go to jail i will do that because i hate you with all my life....
assisin killer to Feathers McGraw
PLEASE I BEG YOU TO LET ME KNOW THAT PIGGIES OF YOURS PLEASE... assisin killer to Feathers again
x5 Team Humphere
Long Live Silver Peak Orphanage! - Loan Lad Langwenya Andile |
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Jayhawk
Baiting Guru
Joined: 07 Jul 2006
Posts: 5727
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Posted:
Wed Aug 08, 2018 12:33 pm |
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He is in full blown panic mode. From the lender Andrew Davis
Quote: |
Dear B
Can I speak with this your Elliot!
Best Regards |
No you may not speak with Elliot. We have decided to go with a different lender. Good day to you sir.
From Yolanda Adams
Quote: |
Hello
What are you talking about? I'm here to help you |
You are nothing but a two bit chief looking to steal from orphans. You are not the real Yolanda Adams.
A new loan offer shows up in my box from Sister Mary James
Quote: |
Hello
We bring you and your family good news, Our bank is currently giving
out Loan for at low as 4%
If youβre interested please email us
Best Wishes
Sister Mary James
Operational Manager
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And from the lad's original character Mr. Andilie
Quote: |
Hello Pastor Williams
Please I'm so sorry! It's hurt me that I did not hear
From my Young star Young Eliot!
Please your loan check is ready waiting for transfer to you ( Peak Orphanage)
Best Regards
Mr. Andile |
Hello Mr. Andie. It is good to hear from you. Sir, I have to be honest with you. When your customer service said that you were not really a performer I got very very angry. I even started to shop around for another loan. Then the orphan Elliot came to me and said Please Pastor B. It was not his fault. Don't blame him for a mistake someone else made. The boy had tears in his eyes I tell you. Tears rolling down his cheeks. So Mr. Andie if the loan is still available I am interested. But can we make the loan period for 2,000 years? Sister Mary reran the finances and she says that is the time period we will need for a payback.
Mr. Andie I would suggest that your customer service people no longer be involved in this loan as clearly they do not know what they are doing. I would also suggest that we start communicating through your personal email account so a mistake like this does not happen again.
Mr. Andie I do have a request of you. Do you mind if I give the young orphan Elliot your contact information? Friday is his birthday and giving him the contact information of a great stage performer like yourself is the greatest gift I can think of to give him. That boy is something special. He says you are his hero. I don't know what I would do to the person who hurts him. That is the crime that I could not forgive.
If the 2,000 year term is acceptable I will rework the presentation and present to the board when they meet on Friday. Thank you Mr. Andie and I look forward to doing business with you.
Pastor B
That's four lenders now. |
_________________ x8 < slacking?
just checked the site for update now, shipment smurfs in Porto Novo. Yes!! - Stanley
i will not share my smurfs with anybody again - Stanley (again)
Yes pets are allowed as far as you will occupy the apartment alone, you can release the Kraken.
i will kill you even if it take me to go to jail i will do that because i hate you with all my life....
assisin killer to Feathers McGraw
PLEASE I BEG YOU TO LET ME KNOW THAT PIGGIES OF YOURS PLEASE... assisin killer to Feathers again
x5 Team Humphere
Long Live Silver Peak Orphanage! - Loan Lad Langwenya Andile |
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Jayhawk
Baiting Guru
Joined: 07 Jul 2006
Posts: 5727
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Posted:
Wed Aug 08, 2018 2:14 pm |
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Mr. Andilie
Quote: |
Dear Pastor Williams
Thanks for your mail once again I'm grateful for the privilege help
the orphanage.
Yes 2,000 years is very accepted by me on the fact that it's purely
hummanity and putting a smile on orphans faces
Wow I'm so glad once more to hear from young Elliot, please be very
free to give him my contact, Happy Birthday to him in advance the
Future is BRIGHT
Thanks and God bless you
Best Regards
Mr. Andile |
Not to revisit the Humphere vs. Not Humphere debate, but the following caught my eye from his Andrew Davis character
Quote: |
Can I speak with this your Elliot! |
Reminded me of the email his lottery character sent to Pastor B concerning Feathers
Quote: |
I do not trust this your boy |
Humphere also liked to tell Elliot "The future is bright."
We are up to 2,000 years on the loan. Can we get it higher? |
_________________ x8 < slacking?
just checked the site for update now, shipment smurfs in Porto Novo. Yes!! - Stanley
i will not share my smurfs with anybody again - Stanley (again)
Yes pets are allowed as far as you will occupy the apartment alone, you can release the Kraken.
i will kill you even if it take me to go to jail i will do that because i hate you with all my life....
assisin killer to Feathers McGraw
PLEASE I BEG YOU TO LET ME KNOW THAT PIGGIES OF YOURS PLEASE... assisin killer to Feathers again
x5 Team Humphere
Long Live Silver Peak Orphanage! - Loan Lad Langwenya Andile |
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MrMystery314
Djinn and Tonic
Joined: 13 Dec 2014
Posts: 2077
Location: Herding penguins
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Posted:
Wed Aug 08, 2018 2:20 pm |
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I honestly have no words for this. This is simply beautiful. I think you can get to 10000 years for the loan. Prove me right. |
_________________ π π¦ π° π° π° x26
"ALL THE SAME NOT AN UNGRATEFUL BITCH"-Mr. Humphere
"Bro i have seen hell"-Mr. Humphere
"Also i know how inquisitive all this press can be, i hope the picture of the goat fucking me is not on news or news paper"-Mr. Humphere
"GO TO HELL JUSTIN for having played with me all these while, what the fuck is wrong with you you are such as an asshole"-Charles J Colocino JR
"I will tell you I'm a computer illiterate I know more than you" - Eric Marshall
Hello! ~Kitty |
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Jayhawk
Baiting Guru
Joined: 07 Jul 2006
Posts: 5727
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Posted:
Wed Aug 08, 2018 5:05 pm |
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An excited Elliot emails his hero. In the Humphere bait all Elliot got to do was be an obnoxious brat before being hit over the head with a rock and pushed in the lake to drown by Feathers, so I thought I would give him a bigger role this time.
Elliot:
Quote: |
Hello Mr. Andile. My name is Elliot and I am an orphan at the Silver Peak Home for Orphans. I believe Pastor B told you about me. I hope it is okay that I send you an email. I am your biggest fan. I hope that someday I can be a professional performer just like you. Can you tell me a little bit more about yourself? How did you get your start in musical theater? What is your favorite role to sing? What advice would you give to someone like myself who dreams of one day being on stage performing as a professional?
Good golly, I can't believe I am writing someone as famous as you. Will you be my friend? |
Yes, Elliot is just as annoying this time around.
And Pastor B emails the lad
Quote: |
Hello Mr. Andie
Thank you for allowing me to pass your contact information along to the orphan Elliot. When I told him a great performer like yourself wanted to be his friend he jumped up and down crying tears of joy. He should be contacting you shortly, if he has not done so already.
I just finished up the package for the board presentation on Friday so once I get the official approval I will be sending the loan fees to the bank account you provided me.Thank you again for your hard work and the generous donation your company made of $500,000. I assure you it will be put to good use.
God Bless
Pastor B |
I have decided to remove the color coding identifying the characters, as I have run out of colors.
I sure hope nothing goes wrong with the Board presentation on Friday. The fact that the original repayment information was for a period of 900 years and the loan is now for 2,000 years shouldn't mess things up, right? |
_________________ x8 < slacking?
just checked the site for update now, shipment smurfs in Porto Novo. Yes!! - Stanley
i will not share my smurfs with anybody again - Stanley (again)
Yes pets are allowed as far as you will occupy the apartment alone, you can release the Kraken.
i will kill you even if it take me to go to jail i will do that because i hate you with all my life....
assisin killer to Feathers McGraw
PLEASE I BEG YOU TO LET ME KNOW THAT PIGGIES OF YOURS PLEASE... assisin killer to Feathers again
x5 Team Humphere
Long Live Silver Peak Orphanage! - Loan Lad Langwenya Andile |
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Jayhawk
Baiting Guru
Joined: 07 Jul 2006
Posts: 5727
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Posted:
Wed Aug 08, 2018 6:21 pm |
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Damn I hate lads. Keep in mind when reading the following that the lad is doing this in attempt to steal a large sum of money from an orphanage. This is why we do what we do.
To Pastor B
Quote: |
Dear Pastor Williams
Thanks for your hard work too it's not easy to service humanity God Almighty will surely blessed you abundantly!
Yes Young Eliot has email me I'm so glad too what a great privilege
Once you get the approval about the payment please notify me make sure the payment is made accurately with the Bank Account and the evidence of payment be sent for confirmation and verification OK
Once Thanks for this privilege
God bless u
Best Regards
Mr. Andile |
And to the young orphan Elliot
Quote: |
Hello Elliot
How are you? Yes Pastor Williams told me about you and so glad to have you as a friend and as biggest fan in silver Peak Home for 0rphans,
Yes my good friend one day will be a professional and ssuccessful Performer the future is BRIGHT it's the much love I have for you I'm working very hard to make sure the Loan for the musical Theater in Silver Peak Home of 0rphans Will be successful as soon as Possible!
I'm Mr. Andile I was much more like you when I develop my future and likeness for musical Theater, I'm a God fearing man with honest heart I love children
Yes I started my musical theater as a very young age at 16years
My favorite role to sing it's a stage performing
My advice for you my good friend is to keep your dreams and aspirations alive okay don't give up one you will be a professional performer put God first in all!
Hope to hear from you soon
God bless u
Best regards
Mr. Andile |
By the way, if you are ever looking for a place to locate your character feel free to use Silver Peak Nevada. It truly is ghost town with literally nothing in it but a run down shack and a Transponder (is that what you call it?)for relaying electricity. Oh, and a lonely tumbleweed I like to call "Kevin". It has that and a zip code (89047) which comes in handy when a lad looks up online to see the nearest Western Union. Silver Peak played a large role in the California Energy crisis of 2000 and 2001 when Enron attempted to relay all the electricity needed for the entire state through a tiny transponder in Silver Peak. Naturally they couldn't get all of it through, so by law Enron was able to go out on the open market to purchase the needed electricity and charge whatever they wanted. See, around here you get educated as well as entertained.
Now in my version of Silver Peak it has a bank, a local High School (Go Scorpions!) and various other things that make up a small town. But no Western Union or Moneygram. The new Wal Mart is scheduled to be completed next fall and then things will really pick up. And now it has a First rate theater group in the orphans. The town just keeps growing and growing.
edit - An excited Elliot responds
Quote: |
OMG! I cannot believe you emailed me back OMG OMG OMG!!!!!!! I also can't believe you called me your friend! OMG OMG OMG OMG!!!!!!
Mr. Andile you don't know how much this means to me. To have a big successful star like yourself take an interest in little old me Elliot Nobody is just beyond belief. The orphans will be so jealous when I tell them.
Mr. Andile I am sure you get asked this all the time but could I possibly have an autographed picture of you to hang on my wall? Please sign it TO MY FRIEND ELLIOT My birthday is Friday and that would be the bestest Birthday present in the world!
Your friend (I still can't believe it!!
Elliot |
I am now about 80% convinced that this is Humphere but I want a real autographed photo to either prove or disprove it. |
_________________ x8 < slacking?
just checked the site for update now, shipment smurfs in Porto Novo. Yes!! - Stanley
i will not share my smurfs with anybody again - Stanley (again)
Yes pets are allowed as far as you will occupy the apartment alone, you can release the Kraken.
i will kill you even if it take me to go to jail i will do that because i hate you with all my life....
assisin killer to Feathers McGraw
PLEASE I BEG YOU TO LET ME KNOW THAT PIGGIES OF YOURS PLEASE... assisin killer to Feathers again
x5 Team Humphere
Long Live Silver Peak Orphanage! - Loan Lad Langwenya Andile |
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Jayhawk
Baiting Guru
Joined: 07 Jul 2006
Posts: 5727
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Posted:
Wed Aug 08, 2018 11:07 pm |
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Our lad is working Elliot. He obviously does not want to send a picture of himself
Lad:
Quote: |
Hello my friend
Thanks for your mail OK, You are a STAR!
Happy Birthday in Advance, once we send the check to Pastor Williams I will also send you a gift I'm so proud of you!
God bless u |
Elliot
Quote: |
haha I am not a STAR yet but I hope to be one day just like you. OMG you are going to send me a present. What is it? What is it?
Me Andile you did not answer my question about getting an autographed picture of you. When can I expect to get that? You are my idol and it would mean so much to me and I hope you can get it to my soon.
I have to go to rehearsal now. We are rehearsing Fiddler and I am singing the role of Tevye. It is a challenge that is for sure. Good by Mr. Andile and please let me know about that autographed picture.
Your friend Elliot |
Lad
Quote: |
Hello Elliot
Okay I will send you the autographed picture of me very soon
I see you becoming a STAR |
Pastor B will remain silent to him until Friday. Elliot, however, will bug the shit out of him
Elliot:
Quote: |
Hello my friend Mr. Andile. I just finished practice for Fiddler and it did not go well. I just can't get into the character of Tevye. I am having trouble finding his center. I'm sure a big star like you has played Tevye. What did you do to prepare?
Your friend
Elliot |
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_________________ x8 < slacking?
just checked the site for update now, shipment smurfs in Porto Novo. Yes!! - Stanley
i will not share my smurfs with anybody again - Stanley (again)
Yes pets are allowed as far as you will occupy the apartment alone, you can release the Kraken.
i will kill you even if it take me to go to jail i will do that because i hate you with all my life....
assisin killer to Feathers McGraw
PLEASE I BEG YOU TO LET ME KNOW THAT PIGGIES OF YOURS PLEASE... assisin killer to Feathers again
x5 Team Humphere
Long Live Silver Peak Orphanage! - Loan Lad Langwenya Andile |
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Lake Amour
Master of Master Baiters
Joined: 17 Mar 2017
Posts: 524
Location: The Orphanage
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Posted:
Thu Aug 09, 2018 12:28 am |
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It is weird seeing one of your own characters through the eyes of another baiter. Keep bugging the hell out of him!
Sure hope he survives this bait. I put the odds at 1:500. Pretty good for Eliot. |
_________________ Mr Hump Here's Audio Book Collection
"Some of my co workers are beginning to say that you are making a fool of me but I strongly believe you" - Mr Hump Here
"You and your orphanage has destroyed my perfect life" - Mr Hump Here
"Also beside the rear entry as a quicker way to get Fellatio, is there any other thing you need?" - Mr Hump Here
"EAT SHIT AND FUCK YOURSELF WITH RUBBISH." - Tom Sawyer
Team Humphere |
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Jayhawk
Baiting Guru
Joined: 07 Jul 2006
Posts: 5727
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Posted:
Thu Aug 09, 2018 12:43 pm |
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To Elliot:
Quote: |
Hello Elliot
Don't be discouraged all you just need to do to be determined donation is a key to success!
God bless u |
Elliot:
Quote: |
Hello Mr. Andile. Where is my augographed picture? The other orphans are saying I am making all this up about you. Please send me my autographed picture.
Your friend Elliot
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He obviously does not want to send the signed picture
Quote: |
Hello Elliot
Please be claim I want to post my flamed photo to you along with the loan check on post okay
Thanks for your understanding |
Elliot is a bit of a diva
Quote: |
I cannot wait for the signed picture. The other orphans are saying that I am making this up and they are making fun of me. I will not rehearse anymore until I get that picture.
Your friend Elliot |
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_________________ x8 < slacking?
just checked the site for update now, shipment smurfs in Porto Novo. Yes!! - Stanley
i will not share my smurfs with anybody again - Stanley (again)
Yes pets are allowed as far as you will occupy the apartment alone, you can release the Kraken.
i will kill you even if it take me to go to jail i will do that because i hate you with all my life....
assisin killer to Feathers McGraw
PLEASE I BEG YOU TO LET ME KNOW THAT PIGGIES OF YOURS PLEASE... assisin killer to Feathers again
x5 Team Humphere
Long Live Silver Peak Orphanage! - Loan Lad Langwenya Andile |
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Lake Amour
Master of Master Baiters
Joined: 17 Mar 2017
Posts: 524
Location: The Orphanage
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Posted:
Thu Aug 09, 2018 3:30 pm |
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I'll post the dialogue later but Sister Mary has been able to secure a $15M loan over 5000 years. Sadly, 10,000 years was not an option. Good enough. Someone run a loan calculator on that. |
_________________ Mr Hump Here's Audio Book Collection
"Some of my co workers are beginning to say that you are making a fool of me but I strongly believe you" - Mr Hump Here
"You and your orphanage has destroyed my perfect life" - Mr Hump Here
"Also beside the rear entry as a quicker way to get Fellatio, is there any other thing you need?" - Mr Hump Here
"EAT SHIT AND FUCK YOURSELF WITH RUBBISH." - Tom Sawyer
Team Humphere |
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MrMystery314
Djinn and Tonic
Joined: 13 Dec 2014
Posts: 2077
Location: Herding penguins
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Posted:
Thu Aug 09, 2018 4:44 pm |
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What's a "flamed photo" and why is Humphere wanting to send Eliot that instead of an autographed photo? And why has he not sent Eliot his musical videos yet? Bad lad, so mean to poor Eliot... |
_________________ π π¦ π° π° π° x26
"ALL THE SAME NOT AN UNGRATEFUL BITCH"-Mr. Humphere
"Bro i have seen hell"-Mr. Humphere
"Also i know how inquisitive all this press can be, i hope the picture of the goat fucking me is not on news or news paper"-Mr. Humphere
"GO TO HELL JUSTIN for having played with me all these while, what the fuck is wrong with you you are such as an asshole"-Charles J Colocino JR
"I will tell you I'm a computer illiterate I know more than you" - Eric Marshall
Hello! ~Kitty |
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Lake Amour
Master of Master Baiters
Joined: 17 Mar 2017
Posts: 524
Location: The Orphanage
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Posted:
Thu Aug 09, 2018 7:02 pm |
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From Sister Mary...
Quote: |
My dear mr Andile,
I write you with great excitment indeed kind sir as I talk with our dear Pastor B and my name Sister Mary and I sir be in charge of finanaces in the office here at the orphanage. Dear Passtor say you will help us with loan and that be just very kind of you sir indeed. Also all the orphans be very excited about you offer to help and that be very nice of you like I say.
I inform you now kind sir that I indeed have meetings with the Board (they sometimes very mean to me i must confess) but I want you to be finance person for us. But a few things to help us out. I need to know the longest term loan you have available. We are looking for repayment over 10,000 years but if ye perhaps can only do 5,000 that would be just fine. Loan amount to be 15 mil. If you could get me a written form that would be most kind of you if i may declare and i shall right now.
Also, orphans , the little people that live here at orphanage demand all monies come from theater producing and acting people only. Could you please sumbit a photograph of some sort of yourself in a play or on stage with our Orrphanage name on it?
I confess I pretty new at this orphanage as i recent transfer here and you could real help me sir in making a good impression with the board and we will make good team together sir! You and me!
Now sir little orphan Eliot just walk in now and get so excited i writing to you and he say to say hi to you now and so i shall. |
Quote: |
Dear Mary
Thanks for your mail it's well understood OK! I want you to know that everything is perfectly in place for the Loan of $10,000000:00 and our humble donation of $500,000:00 and the Check is fully ready!
If you want any variation please fill out the below information Okay
Loan Amount:...........
Coubtry :....................
Stat:............................
Loan duration:............
If you have any friends and family who need a loan please feel free to give them my contacts for personal Loan, business Loan etc
Hope to hear from you soon
Best Regards
Mr. Andile |
Quote: |
Oh my dear mr Andile,
Yes my sir, we going to make a good team! Do you say perhaps it be possible for loan of 15 mil over 10,000 year or is only 5,000 year possible? Ye indeed let me know soonest? |
Quote: |
Dear Mary
Thanks for your mail it's well noted we are going to really be a good team group to help families and friends with financial aid all over the world
Yes $15,000000:00 under the repayment year of 5,000 Years |
Quote: |
Oh my dear sweet mr Andile,
You make this old woman so happy. Now I bother to present your offer to the board of directors and we going to work as a team to make them so happy indeed kind sir. Might you be able to get me the documents requested it be the formal proposal written out and the photograph of you on stage and as you know in Nevada we need you to send form 11754367-B but i sure you know that already but please hurry sir as i know we have competing offers and since i new here i want to make best impression but i think ye and yours know that yes sir! |
Quote: |
Hello Mary
Thanks for your mail everything is perfectly in place OK! |
An he attached a picture of Bon Iver, labeled ironically, Bon Iver.
Quote: |
Oh my dear kind sir,
I dareth say I confuse just very confuse as I take you beautiful picture and show it to sweet Orphan Eliot and he say that be no way and that is bon iver and not a loan officer and i can't dare show it to the Board of directors or they going to fire me! Are you trying to get me firred Mr Andile??? I sure hope not as I trust Ye and think ye doing quite good but I need ye photo of you on stage and not bon iver.
So here what we do. We work as a team. I will get started on the Nevada form as I mention earlier but ye not provide so I will work on that part. You work on photo of your performance and it must have orphanage name on it, i sure you understand to prevent fraud and whatnot. You get that to me soonest as meeting suppose be tomorrow sir. |
No photo, no loan. |
_________________ Mr Hump Here's Audio Book Collection
"Some of my co workers are beginning to say that you are making a fool of me but I strongly believe you" - Mr Hump Here
"You and your orphanage has destroyed my perfect life" - Mr Hump Here
"Also beside the rear entry as a quicker way to get Fellatio, is there any other thing you need?" - Mr Hump Here
"EAT SHIT AND FUCK YOURSELF WITH RUBBISH." - Tom Sawyer
Team Humphere
Last edited by Lake Amour on Sun Aug 12, 2018 3:08 am; edited 1 time in total |
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Discombobulated lass
Master of Master Baiters
Joined: 04 Jan 2016
Posts: 702
Location: Feeding the cat
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Posted:
Thu Aug 09, 2018 9:09 pm |
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You do realise you're gonna put this poor lad off orphanages for life. I just bet he wants to choke the lot of you |
_________________ I am a perpetrator of terminalogical inexactitudes - sometimes!
I am a very proud mother!
bred by Animal Farm Boars
π courtesy of Linoline and Bware
"I am sick and tired of all the the the stress you are give me" - Director, Money Gram Benin
"They have waisted our call card, more than $30, this is not right..." Lad on WU Secure
"You have mental health problems and i hope you know that?? The Shizz |
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Jayhawk
Baiting Guru
Joined: 07 Jul 2006
Posts: 5727
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Posted:
Thu Aug 09, 2018 11:38 pm |
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Lad to Elliot:
Quote: |
Hello Elliot
How are you? How was your night? Please go to rehearsal so you can be a STAR I love you so
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Attached was a picture of a pasty white guy with red hair playing the keyboard. Elliot does not immediately respond so he sends another one
Quote: |
Hello Elliot
Please go to rehearsal I love you so much
I want you to be a STAR like me! |
Elliot responds
Quote: |
I want it autographed! |
Yes, Elliot is a bit of a Diva.
Quote: |
Dear Elliot
You have to appreciate this privilage!
Best Regards |
Quote: |
I want it autographed!! |
A Diva and a brat
Quote: |
Okay its well noted I will send you the autographed |
and
Quote: |
Okay I will send it for you as my biggest fan |
and
Quote: |
Hello Elliot
I'm I still your friend? You need to defend me always the Orphanage loan of $15,000000:00 Check is fully ready ! |
This HAS to be Humphere. No lad could possibly be this stupid. I'm glad we got it up to $15 mil. The orphanage is planning to do Miss Saigon and helicopters aren't cheap. |
_________________ x8 < slacking?
just checked the site for update now, shipment smurfs in Porto Novo. Yes!! - Stanley
i will not share my smurfs with anybody again - Stanley (again)
Yes pets are allowed as far as you will occupy the apartment alone, you can release the Kraken.
i will kill you even if it take me to go to jail i will do that because i hate you with all my life....
assisin killer to Feathers McGraw
PLEASE I BEG YOU TO LET ME KNOW THAT PIGGIES OF YOURS PLEASE... assisin killer to Feathers again
x5 Team Humphere
Long Live Silver Peak Orphanage! - Loan Lad Langwenya Andile |
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MrMystery314
Djinn and Tonic
Joined: 13 Dec 2014
Posts: 2077
Location: Herding penguins
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Posted:
Thu Aug 09, 2018 11:49 pm |
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I am struggling to find words for this sheer lad stupidity. Can he record a video of him playing the piano and singing for Eliot? Also, will Feathers ever return? Thereβs no way that Humphere wouldnβt recognize Feathers, right? Who knows at this point. |
_________________ π π¦ π° π° π° x26
"ALL THE SAME NOT AN UNGRATEFUL BITCH"-Mr. Humphere
"Bro i have seen hell"-Mr. Humphere
"Also i know how inquisitive all this press can be, i hope the picture of the goat fucking me is not on news or news paper"-Mr. Humphere
"GO TO HELL JUSTIN for having played with me all these while, what the fuck is wrong with you you are such as an asshole"-Charles J Colocino JR
"I will tell you I'm a computer illiterate I know more than you" - Eric Marshall
Hello! ~Kitty |
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Jayhawk
Baiting Guru
Joined: 07 Jul 2006
Posts: 5727
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Posted:
Thu Aug 09, 2018 11:52 pm |
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Pastor B breaks the news to our hero
Quote: |
Mr. Andile you have made a big mistake. The orphan Elliot was just in my office and he was in tears. Tears I tell you. He said that instead of an autographed picture of you performing you sent him a picture of some guy named Ben Over. Why would you do something like that? Mr. Andile I told you before that we can only do business with people from the theater and I refuse to do business with people who lie to me. You have left me no choice but to cancel our loan. That is a shame too as I had the paperwork ready to present to the board. Why would you do something like this? You broke young orphan Elliot's heart. Broke his heart I tell you. |
I think this is the fourth time Pastor B has cancelled the loan, but I could be wrong. Hopefully by this point he will have realized that without an autographed picture of HIM there will be no loan. |
_________________ x8 < slacking?
just checked the site for update now, shipment smurfs in Porto Novo. Yes!! - Stanley
i will not share my smurfs with anybody again - Stanley (again)
Yes pets are allowed as far as you will occupy the apartment alone, you can release the Kraken.
i will kill you even if it take me to go to jail i will do that because i hate you with all my life....
assisin killer to Feathers McGraw
PLEASE I BEG YOU TO LET ME KNOW THAT PIGGIES OF YOURS PLEASE... assisin killer to Feathers again
x5 Team Humphere
Long Live Silver Peak Orphanage! - Loan Lad Langwenya Andile |
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Jayhawk
Baiting Guru
Joined: 07 Jul 2006
Posts: 5727
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Posted:
Fri Aug 10, 2018 1:58 am |
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Elliot responds
Quote: |
No I am not still your friend. Did you really think I was so stupid as to think the picture you sent me was of you? Really? I told Pastor Burroughs all about it and he was as mad as me. Why would you do something like that to me? I thought you were my friend but you are just a bad man. |
Humphere hated being called a bad man. He is going to have to do some big time sucking up to Elliot to get out of this one. |
_________________ x8 < slacking?
just checked the site for update now, shipment smurfs in Porto Novo. Yes!! - Stanley
i will not share my smurfs with anybody again - Stanley (again)
Yes pets are allowed as far as you will occupy the apartment alone, you can release the Kraken.
i will kill you even if it take me to go to jail i will do that because i hate you with all my life....
assisin killer to Feathers McGraw
PLEASE I BEG YOU TO LET ME KNOW THAT PIGGIES OF YOURS PLEASE... assisin killer to Feathers again
x5 Team Humphere
Long Live Silver Peak Orphanage! - Loan Lad Langwenya Andile |
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Jayhawk
Baiting Guru
Joined: 07 Jul 2006
Posts: 5727
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Posted:
Fri Aug 10, 2018 11:26 am |
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I was wondering how he was going to explain the picture. He already has use the Customer Care Sent It excuse, so he had to come up with a new reason. To Elliot:
Quote: |
Hello Elliot
I just sent that picture for you to show that that is my mentor okay, you just have to understand me
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And
Quote: |
Hello Elliot
I'm very sorry for that please
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To Pastor B
Quote: |
Dear pastor Williams
Please I'm very sorry I just sent him the picture to show him that the guy was my mentor, please I will send him the Autographed okay please understand me I'm sorry, I just send him my mentor picture to keep my my young friend Elliot happy please I'm sorry!
As I speak with you now the Loan Check is Ready Waiting for your payment!
I'm very sorry please I have also apologize to him (Young Elloit)
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Pastor B responds
Quote: |
I think we are past the point of an autographed picture clearing things up, wouldn't you agree? Young Elliot has locked himself in his room and is refusing to rehearse. The boy is devastated. And on his birthday of all days. If you want to make things right you need to send a video of yourself singing happy birthday to young Elliot. . A video of YOU not your mentor or someone from customer care or pastor frank the town drunk. YOU! Then and only then will you stand a chance of getting this loan back on track. |
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_________________ x8 < slacking?
just checked the site for update now, shipment smurfs in Porto Novo. Yes!! - Stanley
i will not share my smurfs with anybody again - Stanley (again)
Yes pets are allowed as far as you will occupy the apartment alone, you can release the Kraken.
i will kill you even if it take me to go to jail i will do that because i hate you with all my life....
assisin killer to Feathers McGraw
PLEASE I BEG YOU TO LET ME KNOW THAT PIGGIES OF YOURS PLEASE... assisin killer to Feathers again
x5 Team Humphere
Long Live Silver Peak Orphanage! - Loan Lad Langwenya Andile |
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Jayhawk
Baiting Guru
Joined: 07 Jul 2006
Posts: 5727
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Posted:
Fri Aug 10, 2018 2:11 pm |
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He is in panic mode once again
To Elliot:
Quote: |
Hello Elliot
Happy birthday to you i will send u the autograph okay |
And to Pastor B.
Quote: |
Dear pastor Williams
Okay I will think over it because itβs against our laws to send videos on line to our businesses partners letβs me contract my legal advisers
In our law itβs the loan seeker should go through this!
Best Regards |
He really does not want to send that video.
Quote: |
Hello Mr. Andie
Thank you for your email. I shalll start looking elsewhere for my loan. Perhaps from someone who does not constantly lie to me.
Pastor William B |
I'm guessing his legal advisers will tell him not to do it. I believe this is the fifth time Pastor B has cancelled the loan. I fully expect my inbox to start filling up with loan offers. |
_________________ x8 < slacking?
just checked the site for update now, shipment smurfs in Porto Novo. Yes!! - Stanley
i will not share my smurfs with anybody again - Stanley (again)
Yes pets are allowed as far as you will occupy the apartment alone, you can release the Kraken.
i will kill you even if it take me to go to jail i will do that because i hate you with all my life....
assisin killer to Feathers McGraw
PLEASE I BEG YOU TO LET ME KNOW THAT PIGGIES OF YOURS PLEASE... assisin killer to Feathers again
x5 Team Humphere
Long Live Silver Peak Orphanage! - Loan Lad Langwenya Andile |
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Lake Amour
Master of Master Baiters
Joined: 17 Mar 2017
Posts: 524
Location: The Orphanage
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Posted:
Fri Aug 10, 2018 3:24 pm |
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To Sister Mary:
Quote: |
Hello Mary
I want you to know that it's me that require the full picture of you and the orphanage! It's not easy to give a loan check of $15,000000:00 I will only send my photo d
Flame to place in the orphanage office
along with that check and my Humble donation of $500,000:00
Thanks for your understanding |
I don't understand that jibberish at all.
Sister replies...
Quote: |
my dear sweet mr andile,
I am about to go in front of the board. You have not sent me the required materials and thus there be no way I can get thiss approved! I think ye trying to get me fired just like last person to try this trickery! I going to lose my job now and little orphan eliot admire you so and yet ye let thy down and this all be very sad indeed. I thought we were a team but you think there be an i in team and there is not kind sir if i may say so myself. |
Lad isn't budging. I'm solidly in the "Not Hump" camp.
Quote: |
Dear Mary
Okay well we have to contact our legal advisers ! |
Quote: |
Dear sir,
I hath no time for you games. Other loan people are going to win this loan an it be all you fault and it be Orphan Eliot birthday and he so upset he is shading tears. Dear pastor say you record birthday video for him and that be quite nice of you to do.
Your teammate,
Sister Mary |
The "shading tears" is from Hump. Thought I'd try it. I like the parallels. |
_________________ Mr Hump Here's Audio Book Collection
"Some of my co workers are beginning to say that you are making a fool of me but I strongly believe you" - Mr Hump Here
"You and your orphanage has destroyed my perfect life" - Mr Hump Here
"Also beside the rear entry as a quicker way to get Fellatio, is there any other thing you need?" - Mr Hump Here
"EAT SHIT AND FUCK YOURSELF WITH RUBBISH." - Tom Sawyer
Team Humphere
Last edited by Lake Amour on Sun Aug 12, 2018 3:08 am; edited 1 time in total |
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